The Marauders and Lily Read Order of the Phoenix
by Elspeth25
Summary: Sequel to The Marauders and Lily Read Goblet of Fire. The fifth Harry Potter book falls into the hands of Lily and the Marauders. As with the previous three books, they read it in the Room of Requirement. Please read and review.
1. Dudley Demented

Author's Note: Well, I have got my sixth fic up. Thanks goes to my sister, Lady Alianne, who has kindly volunteered to be my beta and looked over this chapter, even though it's taking time away from updating her fics. Then I again, I am her beta, so it's to be expected. Oh, and she is going to have an new chapter up very soon in her fic _A Different Future_, which is what the life for the Marauders is like after they've read the Harry Potter books.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I repeat, I do not own Harry Potter, other than my books. This is not written to make money, but merely for entertainment. Do not bother to sue me, because I am a college student with not much in the way of money.

The next morning, after breakfast, Lily and the Marauders went to the Room of Requirement to read _Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix._ As they settled down on the loveseat and comfy armchairs, Remus and James quickly summarized what had happened in the last few chapters of _Goblet of Fire _for Peter. He was relieved to find that Dumbledore had taken action to combat Voldemort's rise to power, and very annoyed that Fudge hadn't done so. Peter then volunteered to read the first chapter.

**CHAPTER ONE  
Dudley Demented**

"Oh, did something happen to Dudley?" asked Sirius, looking excited.

"I hope so, because otherwise this chapter is going to be boring," said James. "I'm not interested in reading a chapter about Harry's stupid and fat cousin."

**The hottest day of the summer so far was drawing to a close and a drowsy silence lay over the large, square houses of Privet Drive. Cars that were usually gleaming stood dusty in their drives and lawns that were once emerald green lay parched and yellowing -for the use of hosepipes had been banned due to drought. Deprived of their usual car-washing and lawn-mowing pursuits, the inhabitants of Privet Drive had retreated into the shade of their cool houses, windows thrown wide in the hope of tempting in a nonexistent breeze. The only person left outdoors was a teenage boy who was lying flat on his back in a flowerbed outside number four.**

"Must be Harry," said Lily. "What is he doing outside? Did the Dursleys kick him out for a few hours?" Sirius frowned and pulled out his Dursley list.

**He was a skinny, black-haired, bespectacled boy who had the pinched, slightly unhealthy look of someone who has grown a lot in a short space of time. **

"It is Harry," said Remus. "And it looks like he has reached his growth spurt at about the same time you did, James."

**His jeans were torn and dirty, his T-shirt baggy and faded, and the soles of his trainers were peeling away from the uppers.**

"What!" exclaimed Peter. "The Dursleys didn't bother to give him decent clothes and shoes?" Sirius frowned and added again to his Dursley list.

**Harry Potter's appearance did not endear him to the neighbours, who were the sort of people who thought scruffiness ought to be punishable by law, **

"Hey, it's not his fault that his relatives don't give him decent clothes to wear!" snapped James. "Why doesn't Harry change some of his galleons into pounds and buy some decent Muggle clothes?"

"Because the Dursleys would notice and ask where he had gotten the clothes, and then Harry would be forced to tell them about the small fortune you and Lily left him," responded Remus.

**but as he had hidden himself behind a large hydrangea bush this evening he was quite invisible to passers-by. In fact, the only way he would be spotted was if his Uncle Vernon or Aunt Petunia stuck their heads out of the living-room window and looked straight down into the flowerbed below.**

**On the whole, Harry thought he was to be congratulated on his idea of hiding here. He was not, perhaps, very comfortable lying on the hot, hard earth but, on the other hand, nobody was glaring at him, grinding their teeth so loudly that he could not hear the news, or shooting nasty questions at him, as had happened every time he had tried sitting down in the living room to watch television with his aunt and uncle.**

"What!" demanded Sirius. "Harry has every right to watch the news!" He added to his Dursley list.

**Almost as though this thought had fluttered through the open window, Vernon Dursley, Harry's uncle, suddenly spoke.**

**"Glad to see the boy's stopped trying to butt in. Where is he, anyway?"**

**"I don't know," said Aunt Petunia, unconcerned. 'Not in the house."**

**Uncle Vernon grunted.**

**'Watching the news …' he said scathingly. 'I'd like to know what he's really up to. As if a normal boy cares what's on the news -Dudley hasn't got a clue what's going on; doubt he knows who the Prime Minister is! Anyway, it's not as if there'd be anything about his lot on our news — '**

"But there could be reports of unexplained deaths!" snapped Lily. "Harry just wants to know what Voldemort, sorry Peter, Moldywart, is up to!"

**'Vernon, shh!' said Aunt Petunia. 'The window's open!'**

**'Oh - yes - sorry, dear.'**

**The Dursleys fell silent. Harry listened to a jingle about Fruit 'n' Bran breakfast cereal while he watched Mrs. Figg, a batty cat-loving old lady from nearby Wisteria Walk, amble slowly past. She was frowning and muttering to herself. Harry was very pleased he was concealed behind the bush, as Mrs. Figg had recently taken to asking him round for tea whenever she met him in the street. **

"Why is she doing that?" asked Peter.

"Maybe she's the Arabella Figg that Dumbledore asked Sirius to contact," answered James. Then seeing Peter's puzzled look, he explained, "I told you that Dumbledore asked Sirius to contact some people from the 'old crowd'. Besides Remus, Dumbledore also mentioned Arabella Figg and Mundungus Fletcher."

**She had rounded the corner and vanished from view before Uncle Vernon's voice floated out of the window again.**

**'Dudders out for tea?'**

**'At the Polkisses',' said Aunt Petunia fondly. 'He's got so many little friends, he's so popular."**

**Harry suppressed a snort with difficulty. The Dursleys really were astonishingly stupid about their son, Dudley. They had swallowed all his dim-witted lies about having tea with a different member of his gang every night of the summer holidays. Harry knew perfectly well that Dudley had not been to tea anywhere; he and his gang spent every evening vandalising the play park, smoking on street corners and throwing stones at passing cars and children. **

"So Dudley's turned into a juvenile deliquent," commented Lily. "Why am I not surprised?"

**Harry had seen them at it during his evening walks around Little Whinging; he had spent most of the holidays wandering the streets, scavenging newspapers from bins along the way.**

**The opening notes of the music that heralded the seven o'clock news reached Harry's ears and his stomach turned over. Perhaps tonight - after a month of waiting - would be the night.**

**'Record numbers of stranded holiday makers fill airports as the Spanish baggage-handlers' strike reaches its second week -**

"A strike?" asked Peter, puzzled.

"That's when workers stop working in protest until they've gotten better working conditions or higher wages or something similar," explained Remus.

**'Give 'em a lifelong siesta, I would,' snarled Uncle Vernon over the end of the newsreader's sentence, but no matter; outside in the flowerbed, Harry's stomach seemed to unclench. If anything had happened, it would surely have been the first item on the news; death and destruction were more important than stranded holidaymakers.**

"It would," muttered Sirius. "Well, Moldywart's keeping a low profile at the moment, so that's good."

**He let out a long, slow breath and stared up at the brilliant blue sky. Every day this summer had been the same: the tension, the expectation, the temporary relief, and then mounting tension again… and always, growing more insistent all the time, the question of why nothing had happened yet.**

**He kept listening, just in case there was some small clue, not recognised for what it really was by the Muggles - an unexplained disappearance, perhaps, or some strange accident… but the baggage-handlers' strike was followed by news about the drought in the Southeast ('I hope he's listening next door!' bellowed Uncle Vernon. 'Him with his sprinklers on at three in the morning!'), then a helicopter that had almost crashed in a field in Surrey, then a famous actress's divorce from her famous husband ('As if we're interested in their sordid affairs,' sniffed Aunt Petunia, who had followed the case obsessively in every magazine she could lay her bony hands on).**

"Petunia likes to do that now," said Lily. "Then when it comes up on the news, she acts like she's not interested."

**Harry closed his eyes against the now blazing evening sky as the newsreader said, '- and finally, Bungy the budgie has found a novel way of keeping cool this summer. Bungy, who lives at the Five Feathers in Barnsley, has learned to water ski! Mary Dorkins went to find out more.'**

"What's a budgie?" asked Peter.

"Budgie, or budgerigar, is a type of bird," replied Remus. "Specifically, a small parrot, also known as a parakeet in the States."

"Did you swallow a dictionary?" asked James, awed. "Or was an encyclopedia in a past life?" Remus gave him a look that said plainly, _I read, unlike you_.

**Harry opened his eyes. If they had reached water-skiing budgerigars, there would be nothing else worth hearing. He rolled cautiously on to his front and raised himself on to his knees and elbows, preparing to crawl out from under the window.**

**He had moved about two inches when several things happened in very quick succession.**

"What happened?" asked Sirius, sitting up right. They all looked alarmed.

**A loud, echoing crack broke the sleepy silence like a gunshot; a cat streaked out from under a parked car and flew out of sight; a shriek, a bellowed oath and the sound of breaking china came from the Dursleys' living room, and as though this was the signal Harry had been waiting for he jumped to his feet, at the same time pulling from the waistband of his jeans a thin wooden wand as if he were unsheathing a sword - but before he could draw himself up to full height, the top of his head collided with the Dursleys' open window. **

"Ouch," said James, wincing. "That has got to hurt. Poor Harry."

**The resultant crash made Aunt Petunia scream even louder.**

**Harry felt as though his head had been split in two. Eyes streaming, he swayed, trying to focus on the street to spot the source of the noise, but he had barely staggered upright when two large purple hands reached through the open window and closed tightly around his throat.**

"Get your hands off my son, Dursley!" snapped Lily. Sirius added to his Dursley list.

**'Put - it - away!' Uncle Vernon snarled into Harry's ear. 'Now. Before - anyone - sees!'**

**'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wand; then, as the pain in the top of Harry's head gave a particularly nasty throb, Uncle Vernon yelped and released Harry as though he had received an electric shock. Some invisible force seemed to have surged through his nephew, making him impossible to hold.**

"Serves you right, Dursley," muttered Peter. "Keep your hands of Harry."

**Panting, Harry fell forwards over the hydrangea bush, straightened up and stared around. There was no sign of what had caused the loud cracking noise, but there were several faces peering through various nearby windows. Harry stuffed his wand hastily back into his jeans and tried to look innocent.**

**'Lovely evening!' shouted Uncle Vernon, waving at Mrs. Number Seven opposite, who was glaring from behind her net curtains. 'Did you hear that car backfire just now? Gave Petunia and me quite a turn!'**

**He continued to grin in a horrible, manic way until all the curious neighbours had disappeared from their various windows, then the grin became a grimace of rage as he beckoned Harry back towards him.**

"I suppose he's going to blame everything on Harry now," said Remus.

**Harry moved a few steps closer, taking care to stop just short of the point at which Uncle Vernon's outstretched hands could resume their strangling.**

**'What the devil do you mean by it, boy?' asked Uncle Vernon in a croaky voice that trembled with fury.**

**'What do I mean by what?' said Harry coldly. He kept looking left and right up the street, still hoping to see the person who had made the cracking noise.**

**'Making a racket like a starting pistol right outside our -'**

"Harry didn't make that noise!" snapped Sirius. "Stop accusing him of stuff he hasn't done!" He added to his list.

**'I didn't make that noise,' said Harry firmly.**

**Aunt Petunia's thin, horsy face now appeared beside Uncle Vernon's wide, purple one. She looked livid.**

**'Why were you lurking under our window?'**

"To listen to the news since you're making it difficult for him to watch it in the living room!" shouted Lily.

**'Yes - yes, good point, Petunia! What were you doing under our window, boy?'**

**'Listening to the news,' said Harry in a resigned voice.**

"Why couldn't you have lied?" asked Sirius. "You could have said that you were just resting there or something?"

**His aunt and uncle exchanged looks of outrage.**

**'Listening to the news! Again?'**

**'Well, it changes every day, you see,' said Harry.**

**'Don't you be clever with me, boy! I want to know what you're really up to - and don't give me any more of this listening to the news tosh! You know perfectly well that your lot -'**

**'Careful, Vernon!' breathed Aunt Petunia, and Uncle Vernon lowered his voice so that Harry could barely hear him,'- that your lot don't get on our news!'**

"They will if it involves strange death or disappearances!" snapped James. "Or like when Sirius was on the news."

**'That's all you know,' said Harry.**

**The Dursleys goggled at him for a few seconds, then Aunt Petunia said, 'You're a nasty little liar. What are all those -' she, too, lowered her voice so that Harry had to lip-read the next word, '- owls doing if they're not bringing you news?'**

**'Aha!' said Uncle Vernon in a triumphant whisper. 'Get out of that one, boy! As if we didn't know you get all your news from those pestilential birds!'**

**Harry hesitated for a moment. It cost him something to tell the truth this time, even though his aunt and uncle could not possibly know how bad he felt at admitting it.**

**'The owls… aren't bringing me news,' he said tonelessly.**

"What?" yelped Peter. "If Harry's not getting the _Daily Prophet_, wouldn't Ron and Hermione be telling him what's going on?"

"Maybe they're not allowed to, in case the letters are intercepted," suggested Remus. "Like when Sirius wouldn't reveal to Harry where he was hiding in his letters."

**'I don't believe it,' said Aunt Petunia at once.**

**'No more do I,' said Uncle Vernon forcefully.**

**'We know you're up to something funny,' said Aunt Petunia.**

**'We're not stupid, you know,' said Uncle Vernon.**

"Really?" asked Sirius. "That's news to me!" The others chuckled at this statement.

**'Well, that's news to me,' said Harry, his temper rising, and before the Dursleys could call him back, he had wheeled about, crossed the front lawn, stepped over the low garden wall and was striding off up the street.**

**He was in trouble now and he knew it. He would have to face his aunt and uncle later and pay the price for his rudeness, but he did not care very much just at the moment; he had much more pressing matters on his mind.**

"Yeah, like who made that sound," said James. "And where's Dudley? The chapter title has his name, but so far there hasn't been any mention of him besides Petunia thinking he's having tea at a friend's house and Harry thinking about the reality."

**Harry was sure the cracking noise had been made by someone Apparating or Disapparating. It was exactly the sound Dobby the house-elf made when he vanished into thin air. **

"But wouldn't the sound be quieter since house-elves are smaller than wizards?" asked Peter.

"Yeah," said Remus. "Maybe it was a wizard or witch."

**Was it possible that Dobby was here in Privet Drive? Could Dobby be following him right at this very moment? As this thought occurred he wheeled around and stared back down Privet Drive, but it appeared to be completely deserted and Harry was sure that Dobby did not know how to become invisible.**

**He walked on, hardly aware of the route he was taking, for he had pounded these streets so often lately that his feet carried him to his favourite haunts automatically. Every few steps he glanced back over his shoulder. Someone magical had been near him as he lay among Aunt Petunia's dying begonias, he was sure of it. Why hadn't they spoken to him, why hadn't they made contact, why were they hiding now?**

"Maybe they're not supposed to?" asked Lily. "Or they could have Disapparated out of Privet Drive."

**And then, as his feeling of frustration peaked, his certainty leaked away.**

**Perhaps it hadn't been a magical sound after all. Perhaps he was so desperate for the tiniest sign of contact from the world to which he belonged that he was simply overreacting to perfectly ordinary noises. Could he be sure it hadn't been the sound of something breaking inside a neighbour's house?**

"I suppose," said James, but he looked skeptical.

**Harry felt a dull, sinking sensation in his stomach and before he knew it the feeling of hopelessness that had plagued him all summer rolled over him once again.**

**Tomorrow morning he would be woken by the alarm at five o'clock so he could pay the owl that delivered the _Daily Prophet_ -**

"So Harry is getting the _Daily Prophet_," said Sirius. "So then why would he say that he's not getting any news?"

"Probably because it doesn't have anything to do with Moldywart," answered Remus. "If Fudge refuses to believe that Moldywart's back, then the newspaper isn't going to print anything concerning his return."

**but was there any point continuing to take it? Harry merely glanced at the front page before throwing it aside these days; when the idiots who ran the paper finally realised that Voldemort was back it would be headline news, and that was the only kind Harry cared about.**

"Well, unless Moldeywart shows himself, the _Daily Prophet_ and much of the Ministry aren't going to believe that he's back," said Lily.

**If he was lucky, there would also be owls carrying letters from his best friends Ron and Hermione, though any expectation he'd had that their letters would bring him news had long since been dashed.**

_**We can't say much about you-know-what, obviously… We've been told not to say anything important in case our letters go astray… We're quite busy but I can't give you details here… There's a fair amount going on, we'll tell you everything when we see you…**_

"So Hermione and Ron have to be careful about what they put in writing," said Peter. "But it must be frustrating for Harry."

**But when were they going to see him? Nobody seemed too bothered with a precise date. Hermione had scribbled _'I expect we'll be seeing you quite soon_' inside his birthday card, but how soon was soon? As far as Harry could tell from the vague hints in their letters, Hermione and Ron were in the same place, presumably at Ron's parents' house. He could hardly bear to think of the pair of them having fun at The Burrow when he was stuck in Privet Drive. In fact, he was so angry with them he had thrown away, unopened, the two boxes of Honeydukes chocolates they'd sent him for his birthday. **

"It's not their fault that they can't tell you anything and you can't leave Privet Drive yet!" cried James.

**He'd regretted it later, after the wilted salad Aunt Petunia had provided for dinner that night.**

"See?" said Remus. "You should have kept your temper and and the chocolate."

**And what were Ron and Hermione busy with? Why wasn't he, Harry, busy? Hadn't he proved himself capable of handling much more than them? Had they all forgotten what he had done? Hadn't it been he who had entered that graveyard and watched Cedric being murdered, and been tied to that tombstone and nearly killed?**

"Yes," said Sirius, looking sad. "But Dumbledore probably wants you to remain at Privet Drive for the time being because you're safer there."

**Don't think about that, Harry told himself sternly for the hundredth lime that summer. It was bad enough that he kept revisiting the graveyard in his nightmares, without dwelling on it in his waking moments too.**

"My poor son," said Lily. "If only I could be there for him."

**He turned a corner into Magnolia Crescent; halfway along he passed the narrow alleyway down the side of a garage where he had first clapped eyes on his godfather. Sirius, at least, seemed to understand how Harry was feeling. Admittedly, his letters were just as empty of proper news as Ron and Hermione's, but at least they contained words of caution and consolation instead of tantalising hints:**

_**I know this must be frustrating for you… Keep your nose clean and everything will be OK… Be careful and don't do anything rash…**_

Sirius grinned and Peter said, "Thank Merlin Sirius understands what Harry's feeling."

**Well, thought Harry, as he crossed Magnolia Crescent, turned into Magnolia Road and headed towards the darkening play park, he had (by and large) done as Sirius advised. He had at least resisted the temptation to tie his trunk to his broomstick and set off for The Burrow by himself. **

"Thank Merlin you resisted that temptation!" exclaimed Lily, looking relieved. "What if the Weasleys weren't at their home at all?"

"Where else would they be?" asked James. Lily shrugged, because she had no idea, the others apparently didn't either.

**In fact, Harry thought his behaviour had been very good considering how frustrated and angry he felt at being stuck in Privet Drive so long, reduced to hiding in flowerbeds in the hope of hearing something that might point to what Lord Voldemort was doing. Nevertheless, it was quite galling to be told not to be rash by a man who had served twelve years in the wizard prison, Azkaban, escaped, attempted to commit the murder he had been convicted for in the first place, then gone on the run with a stolen Hippogriff.**

"Just because I've done some rash things doesn't mean that I want you to do the same, Harry!" exclaimed Sirius. "With Moldywart back in power, you're in danger, and I want you to be safe, even if you have to be stuck at the Dursleys!"

**Harry vaulted over the locked park gate and set off across the parched grass. The park was as empty as the surrounding streets. When he reached the swings he sank on to the only one that Dudley and his friends had not yet managed to break, coiled one arm around the chain and stared moodily at the ground. He would not be able to hide in the Dursleys' flowerbed again. **

"If you had lied about it, then you would be able to hide in the flowerbed again!" said Peter.

**Tomorrow, he would have to think of some fresh way of listening to the news. In the meantime, he had nothing to look forward to but another restless, disturbed night, because even when he escaped the nightmares about Cedric he had unsettling dreams about long dark corridors, all finishing in dead ends and locked doors, which he supposed had something to do with the trapped feeling he had when he was awake. **

"I wonder if those dreams mean anything," mused Remus. "Probably not, except as an expression of Harry's trapped feeling."

**Often the old scar on his forehead prickled uncomfortably, but he did not fool himself that Ron or Hermione or Sirius would find that very interesting any more. In the past, his scar hurting had warned that Voldemort was getting stronger again, but now that Voldemort was back they would probably remind him that its regular irritation was only to be expected… nothing to worry about… old news…**

"It might be expected, but it can't be nothing to worry about!" exclaimed James.

**The injustice of it all welled up inside him so that he wanted to yell with fury. If it hadn't been for him, nobody would even have known Voldemort was back! And his reward was to be stuck in Little Whinging for four solid weeks, completely cut off from the magical world, reduced to squatting among dying begonias so that he could hear about water-skiing budgerigars! **

"Calm down Harry!" said Lily, looking alarmed. "You need to keep a rein on your temper! And you're probably stuck at Privte Drive at the moment because it's safer. I'm sure in a few days you'll be allowed to join the Weasleys and Hermione."

**How could Dumbledore have forgotten him so easily? Why had Ron and Hermione got together without inviting him along, too? **

"Probably because Dumbledore isn't allowing you to leave yet," said Remus practically.

**How much longer was he supposed to endure Sirius telling him to sit tight and be a good boy; or resist the temptation to write to the stupid _Daily Prophet_ and point out that Voldemort had returned? **

"Even if you did write to the _Daily Prophet_ that Moldywart returned, they probably wouldn't believe you," said Sirius. "And even if they did, Fudge could be putting pressure on them to do what he says, so they might not print it."

**These furious thoughts whirled around in Harry's head, and his insides writhed with anger as a sultry, velvety night fell around him, the air full of the smell of warm, dry grass, and the only sound that of the low grumble of traffic on the road beyond the park railings.**

**He did not know how long he had sat on the swing before the sound of voices interrupted his musings and he looked up. The streetlamps from the surrounding roads were casting a misty glow strong enough to silhouette a group of people making their way across the park. One of them was singing a loud, crude song. The others were laughing. A soft ticking noise came from several expensive racing bikes that they were wheeling along.**

**Harry knew who those people were. The figure in front was unmistakeably his cousin, Dudley Dursley, wending his way home, accompanied by his faithful gang.**

"And now Dudley appears!" said Peter, grimacing. "And we can find out what the chapter title means."

**Dudley was as vast as ever, but a year's hard dieting and the discovery of a new talent had wrought quite a change in his physique. As Uncle Vernon delightedly told anyone who would listen, Dudley had recently become the Junior Heavyweight Inter-School Boxing Champion of the Southeast. **

"Boxing?" asked Sirius. "What's that?"

"It's a Muggle sport," responded Lily. "Two people put on these large gloves and punch each other with them for a certain number of rounds. If one of them collapses for the count of ten, then he loses that round. The person who wins the most rounds or gains the most points is the winner. I'm not entirely sure about the rules and stuff, since I'm not interested in it."

**'The noble sport', as Uncle Vernon called it, had made Dudley even more formidable than he had seemed to Harry in their primary school days when he had served as Dudley's first punchball. Harry was not remotely afraid of his cousin any more but he still didn't think that Dudley learning to punch harder and more accurately was cause for celebration.**

"We don't either," said James, frowning.

**Neighbourhood children all around were terrified of him - even more terrified than they were of 'that Potter boy' who, they had been warned, was a hardened hooligan and attended St. Brutus's Secure Centre for Incurably Criminal Boys.**

"Harry doesn't go there!" snapped Remus. "Are the Dursleys still spreading that around?"

"Well, Harry doesn't go around punching the neighborhood children, so it's no wonder they're more scared of Dudley," said Peter.

**Harry watched the dark figures crossing the grass and wondered who they had been beating up tonight. Look round, Harry found himself thinking as he watched them. Come on… look round… I'm sitting here all alone… come and have a go…**

"That might not be a good idea," said Lily. "Dudley might be too afraid of magic to do anything to Harry, his firends won't be."

**If Dudley's friends saw him sitting here, they would be sure to make a beeline for him, and what would Dudley do then? He wouldn't want to lose face in front of the gang, but he'd be terrified of provoking Harry… it would be really fun to watch Dudley's dilemma, to taunt him, watch him, with him powerless to respond… and if any of the others tried hitting Harry, he was ready - he had his wand. Let them try… he'd love to vent some of his frustration on the boys who had once made his life hell.**

"But then you'll get in trouble for using magic out of school!" protested Remus. "You could even be expelled!"

**But they didn't turn around, they didn't see him, they were almost at the railings. Harry mastered the impulse to call after them… seeking a fight was not a smart move… he must not use magic… he would be risking expulsion again. ****The voices of Dudley's gang died away; they were out of sight, heading along Magnolia Road.**

**There you go, Sirius, Harry thought dully. Nothing rash. Kept my nose clean. Exactly the opposite of what you'd have done.**

"Maybe," said Sirius. "But I wouldn't do that in your time, Harry! I'm an adult then, and somewhat responsible. And you have to be careful these days!"

**He got to his feet and stretched. Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon seemed to feel that whenever Dudley turned up was the right time to be home, and any time after that was much too late. Uncle Vernon had threatened to lock Harry in the shed if he came home after Dudley ever again, so, stifling a yawn, and still scowling, Harry set off towards the park gate.**

"If you ever lock Harry in the shed, I swear I'll find some way to hex you!" snapped James. Sirius added "threatening Harry" to the Dursley list.

**Magnolia Road, like Privet Drive, was full of large, square houses with perfectly manicured lawns, all owned by large, square owners who drove very clean cars similar to Uncle Vernon's. Harry preferred Little Whinging by night, when the curtained windows made patches of jewel-bright colour in the darkness and he ran no danger of hearing disapproving mutters about his 'delinquent' appearance when he passed the householders. He walked quickly, so that halfway along Magnolia Road Dudley's gang came into view again; they were saying their farewells at the entrance to Magnolia Crescent. Harry stepped into the shadow of a large lilac tree and waited.**

**'… squealed like a pig, didn't he?' Malcolm was saying, to guffaws from the others.**

"So they were out bullying little kids," said Peter, frowning.

"I wish I could hex them," muttered Sirius. "We don't go around bullying defenceless people much younger than us."

Lily opened her mouth to contradict him, but then shut it again as she realized that Sirius was right. Snape and the rest of the students over fourth year in school were in a position to defend themselves, and the Marauders didn't bother the younger students except with harmless pranks.

**'Nice right hook, Big D,' said Piers.**

"So is that what Dudley's being nicknamed by his friends?" asked James. "I wonder how they'd react if they heard the names Petunia calls him."

**'Same time tomorrow?' said Dudley.  
'Round at my place, my parents will be out,' said Gordon.  
'See you then,' said Dudley.  
'Bye, Dud!'  
'See ya, Big D!'**

**Harry waited for the rest of the gang to move on before setting off again. **

"Wise move," said Remus.

**When their voices had faded once more he headed around the corner into Magnolia Crescent and by walking very quickly he soon came within hailing distance of Dudley, who was strolling along at his ease, humming tunelessly.**

**'Hey, Big D!'**

**Dudley turned. 'Oh,' he grunted. 'It's you.'**

**'How long have you been "Big D" then?' said Harry.**

**'Shut it,' snarled Dudley, turning away.**

**"Cool name," said Harry, grinning and falling into step beside his cousin. "But you'll always be 'Ickle Diddykins' to me."**

They all laughed. "Too bad Dudley's gang can't hear Harry!" gasped Peter between laughter.

**'I said, SHUT IT!' said Dudley, whose ham-like hands had curled into fists.**

**'Don't the boys know that's what your mum calls you?'**

**'Shut your face.'**

**"You don't tell her to shut her face. What about 'Popkin' and 'Dinky Diddydums', can I use them then?"**

They all laughed again.

**Dudley said nothing. The effort of keeping himself from hitting Harry seemed to demand all his self-control.**

**'So who've you been beating up tonight?' Harry asked, his grin fading. 'Another ten-year-old? I know you did Mark Evans two nights ago -**

"Evans?" asked James. "Could he be any relation to you, Lily?"

"I don't think so," replied Lily. "Evans is a very common last name, James."

**'He was asking for it,' snarled Dudley.**

"Really?" said Remus acidly.

**'Oh yeah?'**

**'He cheeked me.'**

"That was brave of this Mark boy," commented Peter.

**"Yeah? Did he say you look like a pig that's been taught to walk on its hind legs? 'Cause that's not cheek, Dud, that's true."**

"Yeah, it is true," said Sirius. They all chuckled.

**A muscle was twitching in Dudley's jaw. It gave Harry enormous satisfaction to know how furious he was making Dudley; he felt as though he was siphoning off his own frustration into his cousin, the only outlet he had.**

**They turned right down the narrow alleyway where Harry had first seen Sirius and which formed a short cut between Magnolia Crescent and Wisteria Walk. It was empty and much darker than the streets it linked because there were no streetlamps. Their footsteps were muffled between garage walls on one side and a high fence on the other.**

**"Think you're a big man carrying that thing, don't you?" Dudley said after a few seconds.**

"Does he mean Harry's wand?" asked James.

"Probably," responded Lily.

**'What thing?'**

**'That - that thing you are hiding.'**

**Harry grinned again.**

**'Not as stupid as you look, are you, Dud? But I's'pose, if you were, you wouldn't be able to walk and talk at the same time.'**

They all burst into laughter again.

**Harry pulled out his wand. He saw Dudley look sideways at it.**

**'You're not allowed,' Dudley said at once. 'I know you're not. You'd get expelled from that freak school you go to.'**

**'How d'you know they haven't changed the rules, Big D?'**

**'They haven't,' said Dudley, though he didn't sound completely convinced.**

"Oooh, he's getting scared," mocked Sirius.

**Harry laughed softly.**

**'You haven't got the guts to take me on without that thing, have you?' Dudley snarled.**

**'Whereas you just need four mates behind you before you can beat up a ten-year old. You know that boxing title you keep banging on about? How old was your opponent? Seven? Eight?'**

**'He was sixteen, for your information,' snarled Dudley, 'and he was out cold for twenty minutes after I'd finished with him and he was twice as heavy as you. You just wait till I tell Dad you had that thing out -'**

"And now Dudley's so scared that he's running to his father," laughed Peter.

**'Running to Daddy now, are you? Is his ickle boxing champ frightened of nasty Harry's wand?'**

**'Not this brave at night, are you?' sneered Dudley.  
**

**'This is night, Diddykins. That's what we call it when it goes all dark like this.'**

**'I mean when you're in bed!' Dudley snarled.**

"What is Dudley talking about?" demanded Remus. The others shrugged.

**He had stopped walking. Harry stopped too, staring at his cousin. From the little he could see of Dudley's large face, he was wearing a strangely triumphant look.**

**'What d'you mean, I'm not brave when I'm in bed?' said Harry, completely nonplussed. 'What am I supposed to be frightened of, pillows or something?'**

**'I heard you last night,' said Dudley breathlessly. 'Talking in your sleep. Moaning.'**

"Oh no, Dudley must have heard Harry during a nightmare," groaned Lily.

**'What d'you mean?' Harry said again, but there was a cold, plunging sensation in his stomach. He had revisited the graveyard last night in his dreams.**

**Dudley gave a harsh bark of laughter, then adopted a high-pitched whimpering voice.**

**"'Don't kill Cedric! Don't kill Cedric!' Who's Cedric - your boyfriend?"**

"No, he was a nice boy who got killed by Voldemort!" snapped Sirius angrily. He added to his Dursley list.

**'I - you're lying,' said Harry automatically. But his mouth had gone dry. He knew Dudley wasn't lying - how else would he know about Cedric?**

**"'Dad! Help me, Dad! He's going to kill me, Dad! Boo hoo!'"**

**'Shut up,' said Harry quietly. 'Shut up, Dudley, I'm warning you!'**

**"'Come and help me, Dad! Mum, come and help me! He's killed Cedric! Dad, help me! He's going to -' Don't you point that thing at me!"**

**Dudley backed into the alley wall. Harry was pointing the wand directly at Dudley's heart. Harry could feel fourteen years' hatred of Dudley pounding in his veins - what wouldn't he give to strike now, to jinx Dudley so thoroughly he'd have to crawl home like an insect, struck dumb, sprouting feelers…**

"However sweet revenge might be, it's not worth being expelled from Hogwarts, Harry," said Remus.

**'Don't ever talk about that again,' Harry snarled. 'D'you understand me?'**

**'Point that thing somewhere else!'**

**'I said, do you understand me?'**

**'Point it somewhere else!'**

**'DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?'**

**'GET THAT THING AWAY FROM -'**

**Dudley gave an odd, shuddering gasp, as though he had been doused in icy water.**

"What happened?" askled Peter, frowning at the book in his hands. Then he continued reading.

**Something had happened to the night. The star-strewn indigo sky was suddenly pitch black and lightless - the stars, the moon, the misty streetlamps at either end of the alley had vanished. The distant rumble of cars and the whisper of trees had gone. The balmy evening was suddenly piercingly, bitingly cold. They were surrounded by total, impenetrable, silent darkness, as though some giant hand had dropped a thick, icy mantle over the entire alleyway, blinding them.**

"Something bad is going on," said Lily. "But I don't know what it is."

**For a split second Harry thought he had done magic without meaning to, despite the fact that he'd been resisting as hard as he could - then his reason caught up with his senses - he didn't have the power to turn off the stars. He turned his head this way and that, trying to see something, but the darkness pressed on his eyes like a weightless veil.**

**Dudley's terrified voice broke in Harry's ear.**

**'W-what are you d-doing? St-stop it!'**

"Harry's not doing anything!" yelled James. "Someone else is!"

**'I'm not doing anything! Shut up and don't move!'**

**'I c-can't see! I've g-gone blind! I -'**

**'I said shut up!'**

**Harry stood stock still, turning his sightless eyes left and right. The cold was so intense he was shivering all over; goose bumps had erupted up his arms and the hairs on the back of his neck were standing up - he opened his eyes to their fullest extent, staring blankly around, unseeing.**

**It was impossible… they couldn't be here… not in Little Whinging… he strained his ears… he would hear them before he saw them…**

"What's here?" asked Peter in a trembling voice.

**'I'll t-tell Dad!' Dudley whimpered. 'W-where are you? What are you d-do—?'**

**'Will you shut up?' Harry hissed, I'm trying to lis—'**

**But he fell silent. He had heard just the thing he had been dreading.**

**There was something in the alleyway apart from themselves, something that was drawing long, hoarse, rattling breaths. Harry felt a horrible jolt of dread as he stood trembling in the freezing air.**

"Oh no!" gasped Remus. "It can't be!"

**'C-cut it out! Stop doing it! I'll h-hit you, I swear I will!'**

**'Dudley, shut—'**

**WHAM.**

**A fist made contact with the side of Harry's head, lifting him off his feet. **

"You idiot!" shouted Sirius, adding to his list.

**Small white lights popped in front of his eyes. For the second time in an hour Harry felt as though his head had been cleaved in two; next moment, he had landed hard on the ground and his wand had flown out of his hand.**

**'You moron, Dudley!' Harry yelled, his eyes watering with pain as he scrambled to his hands and knees, feeling around frantically in the blackness. He heard Dudley blundering away, hitting the alley fence, stumbling.**

**'DUDLEY, COME BACK! YOU'RE RUNNING RIGHT AT IT!'**

**There was a horrible squealing yell and Dudley's footsteps stopped. At the same moment, Harry felt a creeping chill behind him that could mean only one thing. There was more than one.**

"It's n-not a d-dementor, is i-it?" asked Peter, face pale and scared.

"It sounds like it," answered Remus, face grim.

**'DUDLEY, KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT! WHATEVER YOU DO, KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT! Wand!' Harry muttered frantically, his hands flying over the ground like spiders. 'Where's - wand -come on - lumos!'**

**He said the spell automatically, desperate for light to help him in his search - and to his disbelieving relief, light flared inches from his right hand - the wand tip had ignited. Harry snatched it up, scrambled to his feet and turned around.**

**His stomach turned over.**

**A towering, hooded figure was gliding smoothly towards him, hovering over the ground, no feet or face visible beneath its robes, sucking on the night as it came.**

"It is a dementor," groaned James. "That explains the chapter title. What in Merlin's name are dementors doing at Privet Drive? Did Moldywart somehow get them there?"

**Stumbling backwards, Harry raised his wand.**

**'Expecto patronum!'**

**A silvery wisp of vapour shot from the tip of the wand and the Dementor slowed, but the spell hadn't worked properly; tripping over his own feet, Harry retreated further as the Dementor bore down upon him, panic fogging his brain - concentrate - A pair of grey, slimy, scabbed hands slid from inside the Dementor's robes, reaching for him. A rushing noise filled Harry's ears.**

"Oh no!" cried Lily. She buried her face in James' shoulder. Peter's voice shook as he read.

**'Expecto patronum!'**

**His voice sounded dim and distant. Another wisp of silver smoke, feebler than the last, drifted from the wand - he couldn't do it any more, he couldn't work the spell.**

**There was laughter inside his own head, shrill, high-pitched laughter… he could smell the Dementor's putrid, death-cold breath filling his own lungs, drowning him - think… something happy…**

**But there was no happiness in him… the Dementor's icy fingers were closing on his throat - the high-pitched laughter was growing louder and louder, and a voice spoke inside his head: 'Bow to death, Harry…it might even be painless… I would not know … I have never died …"**

"NO!" shouted Sirius. "Fight it and produce a proper Patronus, Harry!"

**He was never going to see Ron and Hermione again - ****And their faces burst clearly into his mind as he fought for breath.  
'EXPECTO PATRONUM!'**

**An enormous silver stag erupted from the tip of Harry's wand; **

The Marauders all cheered and Lily looked up, face full of relief.

**its antlers caught the Dementor in the place where the heart should have been; it was thrown backwards, weightless as darkness, and as the stag charged, the Dementor swooped away, bat-like and defeated.**

**'THIS WAY!' Harry shouted at the stag. Wheeling around, he sprinted down the alleyway, holding the lit wand aloft. 'DUDLEY? DUDLEY!'**

**He had run barely a dozen steps when he reached them: Dudley was curled up on the ground, his arms clamped over his face. A second Dementor was crouching low over him, gripping his wrists in its slimy hands, prising them slowly almost lovingly apart, lowering its hooded head towards Dudley's face as though about to kiss him.**

"No!" gasped Remus. "This cannot be happening!"

**'GET IT!' Harry bellowed, and with a rushing, roaring sound, the silver stag he had conjured came galloping past him. The Dementor's eyeless face was barely an inch from Dudley's when the silver antlers caught it; the thing was thrown up into the air and, like its fellow, it soared away and was absorbed into the darkness; the stag cantered to the end of the alleyway and dissolved into silver mist.**

They all cheered again. "But won't Harry be in trouble for doing magic outside of school?" asked Peter.

"No he won't," replied James. "Not once he explains about the dementors and how he was forced to save him and his cousin from them."

**Moon, stars and streetlamps burst back into life. A warm breeze swept the alleyway. Trees rustled in neighbouring gardens and the mundane rumble of cars in Magnolia Crescent filled the air again.**

**Harry stood quite still, all his senses vibrating, taking in the abrupt return to normality. After a moment, he became aware that his T-shirt was sticking to him; he was drenched in sweat.**

"Oh my poor son," said Lily. "You need to eat some chocolate, dear."

**He could not believe what had just happened. Dementors here, in Little Whinging.**

"We can't either," said Sirius. "At least you were able to repel them."

**Dudley lay curled up on the ground, whimpering and shaking. Harry bent down to see whether he was in a fit state to stand up, but then he heard loud, running footsteps behind him. Instinctively raising his wand again, he span on his heel to face the newcomer.**

"I wonder who's coming," said Peter.

**Mrs. Figg, their batty old neighbour, came panting into sight. **

"What is she doing there?" asked Remus, frowning.

**Her grizzled grey hair was escaping from its hairnet, a clanking string shopping bag was swinging from her wrist and her feet were halfway out of her tartan carpet slippers. Harry made to stow his wand hurriedly out of sight, but -**

**'Don't put it away idiot boy!' she shrieked. 'What if there are more of them around? Oh, I'm going to kill Mundungus Fletcher!'**

They all stared at the book in shock. Finally Lily said, "Looks like Mrs. Figg is the Arabella Figg Dumbledore mentioned. Which means she's a witch. Or a Squib."

"Yeah," said Sirius. "I guess Dumbledore had her near Harry so she could keep an eye on him."

"And what does Mundungus Fletcher have to do with all this?" asked Peter. "Why does Mrs. Figg want to kill him?"

"Maybe he was supposed to watch Harry, but Disapparated," suggested Remus. "That makes the most sense."

"It does," says James. "And Mrs. Figgs would be mad that he left when he was supposed to watch Harry and dementors showed up." As the chapter was over, he volunteered to read the second chapter and took the book from Peter.


	2. A Peck of Owls

Author's Note: I wanted to have this up yestderday, but my sister and beta didn't send this to me until this morning. So it's up a day later than I wanted.

**CHAPTER TWO  
A Peck of Owls**

"Does that mean that Harry is going to get a lot of owls sent to him?" asked Peter.

"It sounds like it," responded Lily. "His friends, Sirius, and the Ministry will have found out what happened and send letters to him regarding the dementor incident."

**'What?' said Harry blankly.**

**'He left!' said Mrs. Figg, wringing her hands. 'Left to see someone about a batch of cauldrons that fell off the back of a broom! I told him I'd flay him alive if he went, and now look! Dementors! It's just lucky I put Mr. Tibbies on the case! **

"Who's Mr. Tibbies?" asked Sirius.

"I think it's one of Mrs. Figg's cats," answered Remus.

**But we haven't got time to stand around! Hurry, now, we've got to get you back! Oh, the trouble this is going to cause! I will kill him!'**

"If Mundungus Fletcher was supposed to be keeping an eye out on Harry, then I'm tempted to kill him too for not being there to help Harry with the dementors," said James.

**'But -' The revelation that his batty old cat-obsessed neighbour knew what Dementors were was almost as big a shock to Harry as meeting two of them down the alleyway. 'You're - you're a witch?'**

"Apparently she us," said Peter.

**'I'm a Squib, **

"Or she could be a squib," said Sirius, blinking. "So this is the second one we've met, after Filch."

**as Mundungus knows full well, so how on earth was I supposed to help you fight off Dementors? He left you completely without cover when I'd warned him -'**

"I can't believe he did that!" snapped Lily. "He's supposed to be keeping an eye on Harry, and instead he just Disapparates away!"

"Probably he had to go check out some stolen goods," said James bitterly. "I'm starting to regret holding some things for him back in first year."

**'This Mundungus has been following me? Hang on - it was him! He Disapparated from the front of my house!'**

**'Yes, yes, yes, but luckily I'd stationed Mr. Tibbies under a car just in case, and Mr. Tibbies came and warned me, but by the time I got to your house you'd gone - and now - oh, what's Dumbledore going to say? You!' she shrieked at Dudley, still supine on the alley floor. 'Get your fat bottom off the ground, quick!'**

**'You know Dumbledore?' said Harry, staring at her.**

"Who wouldn't?" asked Remus. "Besides Muggles I mean."

**'Of course I know Dumbledore, who doesn't know Dumbledore? But come on - I'll be no help if they come back, I've never so much as Transfigured a teabag.'**

**She stooped down, seized one of Dudley's massive arms in her wizened hands and tugged.**

**'Get up, you useless lump, get up!'**

**But Dudley either could not or would not move. He remained on the ground, trembling and ashen-faced, his mouth shut very tight.**

"Poor Dudley, having to face a dementor," said Lily. The others nodded in agreement, because even though they hated Dudley, they didn't like the fact that he had almost recieved the Kiss.

**'I'll do it.' Harry took hold of Dudley's arm and heaved. With an enormous effort he managed to hoist him to his feet. Dudley seemed to be on the point of fainting. His small eyes were rolling in their sockets and sweat was beading his face; the moment Harry let go of him he swayed dangerously.**

"Oh dear," said Remus. "I hope Dudley can walk home like this."

**'Hurry up!' said Mrs. Figg hysterically.**

**Harry pulled one of Dudley's massive arms around his own shoulders and dragged him towards the road, sagging slightly under the weight. Mrs. Figg tottered along in front of them, peering anxiously around the corner.**

"Can't Mrs. Figg help with getting Dudley home?" asked James.

"I suppose she's busy keeping a lookout for more dementors," said Sirius.

**'Keep your wand out,' she told Harry, as they entered Wisteria Walk. 'Never mind the Statute of Secrecy now, there's going to be hell to pay anyway, we might as well be hanged for a dragon as an egg. Talk about the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery… this was exactly what Dumbledore was afraid of - **

"What was Dumbledore afraid of?" asked Peter. "That dementors were going to turn up at Privet Drive? Or that something would happen, forcing Harry to do magic?"

"Either of them is likely," replied James.

**What's that at the end of the street? Oh, it's just Mr. Prentice… don't put your wand away, boy, don't I keep telling you I'm no use?'**

**It was not easy to hold a wand steady and haul Dudley along at the same time. Harry gave his cousin an impatient dig in the ribs, but Dudley seemed to have lost all desire for independent movement. He was slumped on Harry's shoulder, his large feet dragging along the ground.**

"Well, Dudley has been badly affected by the dementors," said Remus. "But he'll recover."

**'Why didn't you tell me you're a Squib, Mrs. Figg?' asked Harry, panting with the effort to keep walking. 'All those times I came round your house - why didn't you say anything?'**

"Yeah, why didn't she say anything?" asked Sirius.

"Probably because Dumbledore told her not to," responded Lily.

**'Dumbledore's orders. I was to keep an eye on you but not say anything, you were too young. I'm sorry I gave you such a miserable time, Harry, but the Dursleys would never have let you come if they'd thought you enjoyed it. **

"Well, of course not," said Peter sourly. Sirius frowned and added to his Dursley list.

**It wasn't easy, you know… but oh my word,' she said tragically, wringing her hands once more, 'when Dumbledore hears about this - how could Mundungus have left, he was supposed to be on duty until midnight - where is he? How am I going to tell Dumbledore what's happened? I can't Apparate.'**

"Harry's got Hedwig, so you can send Dumbledore a letter via her," said James.

**'I've got an owl, you can borrow her.' Harry groaned, wondering whether his spine was going to snap under Dudleys weight.**

**'Harry, you don't understand! Dumbledore will need to act as quickly as possible, the Ministry have their own ways of detecting underage magic, they'll know already, you mark my words.'**

"What, do they have a tracking spell on the wand?" asked Sirius.

"I don't think so," answered Remus. "You and James do magic frquently over the summer, but you don't get any warning letters. The Ministry can only detect, or think they can detect, underage magic if it's in a Muggle house or neighborhood. That's why Harry got in trouble when Dobby used the Hover Charm to smash the pudding."

**'But I was getting rid of Dementors, I had to use magic - they're going to be more worried about what Dementors were doing floating around Wisteria Walk, surely?'**

"I suppose," said Lily. "But the way Fudge was acting at the end of the last book, he might not believe that dementors were really at Wisteria Walk. And even if he did, he might think it was a fluke."

"Yeah," said Peter. "Well, Fudge definitely won't believe that Moldywart had anything to do with the dementors, and say that the dementors can't be outside Ministry control."

"But that was the last book," pointed out Remus. "Fudge could have changed and accepted that Moldywart was back, but is reluctant to tell anyone because of the panic it would cause."

**'Oh, my dear, I wish it were so, but I'm afraid - MUNDUNGUS FLETCHER, I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!'**

**There was a loud crack and a strong smell of drink mingled with stale tobacco filled the air as a squat, unshaven man in a tattered overcoat materialised right in front of them. He had short, bandy legs, long straggly ginger hair and bloodshot, baggy eyes that gave him the doleful look of a basset hound. **

"Well, old Dung sure has changed since he was in school," commented Sirius. "So he smokes and drinks in addition to fencing stolen goods."

**He was also clutching a silvery bundle that Harry recognised at once as an Invisibility Cloak.**

"So the guard on Harry has to be be unseen," said Peter.

**'S'up, Figgy?' **

James and Sirius chuckled. "I can't believe Dung called Mrs. Figg 'Figgy'!" said James.

**he said, staring from Mrs. Figg to Harry and Dudley. 'What 'appened to staying undercover?'**

"Dementors showed up!" shrieked Lily. "So there's no point in undercover now!"

**"I'll give you undercover!' cried Mrs. Figg. 'Dementors, you useless, skiving sneak thief!"**

**'Dementors?' repeated Mundungus, aghast. 'Dementors, 'ere?'**

**'Yes, here, you worthless pile of bat droppings, here!' shrieked Mrs Figg. 'Dementors attacking the boy on your watch!'**

"Does this mean that there are other people keeping an eye on Harry?" asked Peter.

"I would think so," replied James. "With Voldemort back, Dumbledore would want people making sure Harry is safe while wandering about the neighborhood."

**'Blimey,' said Mundungus weakly, looking from Mrs. Figg to Harry, and back again. 'Blimey, I -'**

**'And you off buying stolen cauldrons! Didn't I tell you not to go? Didn't I?'**

**'I - well, I -' Mundungus looked deeply uncomfortable. 'It — it was a very good business opportunity, see -'**

"OH, SO A BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY IS WORTH MORE THAN MY SON'S LIFE?!" shouted Lily, losing her temper.

**Mrs. Figg raised the arm from which her string bag dangled and whacked Mundungus around the face and neck with it; judging by the clanking noise it made it was full of cat food.**

"Serves Mundungus right," muttered Sirius angrily.

**'Ouch - gerroff - gerroff, you mad old bat! Someone's gotta tell Dumbledore!'**

"Yes, and it had better be you!" snapped Remus. "And you can explain why you weren't around to protect Harry!"

**'Yes - they - have!' yelled Mrs. Figg, swinging the bag of cat food at every bit of Mundungus she could reach. 'And - it - had- better - be - you - and - you - can - tell - him - why - you -weren't - there - to - help!'**

**'Keep your 'airnet on!' said Mundungus, his arms over his head, cowering. 'I'm going, I'm going!'  
And with another loud crack, he vanished.**

**'I hope Dumbledore murders him!' said Mrs. Figg furiously. **

"I'm tempted to hope the same," said Lily, frowning.

**'Now come on, Harry, what are you waiting for?'**

**Harry decided not to waste his remaining breath on pointing out that he could barely walk under Dudley's bulk. He gave the semi-conscious Dudley a heave and staggered onwards.**

**'I'll take you to the door,' said Mrs. Figg, as they turned into Privet Drive. 'Just in case there are more of them around… oh my word, what a catastrophe… and you had to fight them off yourself… and Dumbledore said we were to keep you from doing magic at all costs… well, it's no good crying over spilt potion, I suppose… but the cat's among the pixies now.'**

"This is terrible," said Peter. "Harry forced to magic because Mundungus was stupid enough to skip out partway through his watch."

**'So,' Harry panted, 'Dumbledore's… been having… me followed?'**

**'Of course he has,' said Mrs. Figg impatiently. 'Did you expect him to let you wander around on your own after what happened in June? Good Lord, boy, they told me you were intelligent… right… get inside and stay there,' she said, as they reached number four. 'I expect someone will be in touch with you soon enough.'**

"I suppose," said James. "But what is Mrs. Figg going to do?"

**'What are you going to do?' asked Harry quickly.**

**'I'm going straight home,' said Mrs. Figg, staring around the dark street and shuddering. 'I'll need to wait for more instructions. Just stay in the house. Goodnight.'**

"But can't you hang around to explain things to the Dursleys?" asked Sirius. "And give Harry more information?"

**'Hang on, don't go yet! I want to know -**

**But Mrs. Figg had already set off at a trot, carpet slippers flopping, string bag clanking.**

**'Wait!' Harry shouted after her. He had a million questions to ask anyone who was in contact with Dumbledore; but within seconds Mrs. Figg was swallowed by the darkness. Scowling, Harry readjusted Dudley on his shoulder and made his slow, painful way up number four's garden path.**

"Poor Harry, having to deal with all this," said Remus.

**The hall light was on. Harry stuck his wand back inside the waistband of his jeans, rang the bell and watched Aunt Petunia's outline grow larger and larger, oddly distorted by the rippling glass in the front door.**

**'Diddy! About time too, I was getting quite - quite - Diddy, what's the matter!'**

**Harry looked sideways at Dudley and ducked out from under his arm just in time. Dudley swayed on the spot for a moment, his face pale green… then he opened his mouth and vomited all over the doormat.**

"Yuck!" they all exclaimed, grimacing.

**'DIDDY! Diddy, what's the matter with you? Vernon? VERNON!'**

**Harry's uncle came galumphing out of the living room, walrus moustache blowing hither and thither as it always did when he was agitated. He hurried forwards to help Aunt Petunia negotiate a weak-kneed Dudley over the threshold while avoiding stepping in the pool of sick.**

"Ugh," said Peter. "I hope Dudley recovers."

**'He's ill, Vernon!'**

**'What is it, son? What's happened? Did Mrs. Polkiss give you something foreign for tea?'**

"Dudley didn't have tea!" snapped Remus. "He ran into a dementor!"

**'Why are you all covered in dirt, darling? Have you been lying on the ground?'**

**'Hang on - you haven't been mugged, have you, son?'**

"No, it was a dementor!" shouted Sirius. "And Dudley's more likely to mug someone than the other way around!"

**Aunt Petunia screamed.**

**'Phone the police, Vernon! Phone the police! Diddy, darling, speak to Mummy! What did they do to you?'**

**In all the kerfuffle nobody seemed to have noticed Harry, which suited him perfectly. He managed to slip inside just before Uncle Vernon slammed the door and, while the Dursleys made their noisy progress down the hall towards the kitchen, Harry moved carefully and quietly towards the stairs.**

"Good thinking," said James. "Hurry up and get to your room."

**'Who did it, son? Give us names. We'll get them, don't worry.'**

**'Shh! He's trying to say something, Vernon! What is it, Diddy? Tell Mummy!'**

**Harry's foot was on the bottom-most stair when Dudley found his voice.**

**'Him.'**

"Oh no," groaned Lily. "And now Harry's going to get in trouble."

**Harry froze, foot on the stair, face screwed up, braced for the explosion.**

**'BOY! COME HERE!'**

**With a feeling of mingled dread and anger, Harry removed his foot slowly from the stair and turned to follow the Dursleys.**

"Why couldn't Mrs. Figg have stayed?" asked Peter.

**The scrupulously clean kitchen had an oddly unreal glitter after the darkness outside. Aunt Petunia was ushering Dudley into a chair; he was still very green and clammy-looking. Uncle Vernon standing in front of the draining board, glaring at Harry through tiny, narrowed eyes.**

**'What have you done to my son?' he said in a menacing growl.**

"Nothing!" snapped James. "Harry didn't do anything! It was a dementor!"

**'Nothing,' said Harry, knowing perfectly well that Uncle Vernon wouldn't believe him.**

**'What did he do to you, Diddy?' Aunt Petunia said in a quavering voice, now sponging sick from the front of Dudley's leather jacket. 'Was it - was it you-know-what, darling? Did he use - his thing?'**

"Harry used his wand, but it was to fight a dementor!" shouted Sirius.

**Slowly, tremulously, Dudley nodded.**

**'I didn't!' Harry said sharply, as Aunt Petunia let out a wail and Uncle Vernon raised his fists. 'I didn't do anything to him, it wasn't me, it was -**

**But at that precise moment a screech owl swooped in through the kitchen window. Narrowly missing the top of Uncle Vernon's head, it soared across the kitchen, dropped the large parchment envelope it was carrying in its beak at Harry's feet, turned gracefully, the tips of its wings just brushing the top of the fridge, then zoomed outside again and off across the garden.**

"Is this good timing?" asked Lily.

"Well, it's going to distract things for a few minutes," responded Remus.

**'OWLS!' bellowed Uncle Vernon, the well-worn vein in his temple pulsing angrily as he slammed the kitchen window shut. 'OWLS AGAIN! I WILL NOT HAVE ANY MORE OWLS IN MY HOUSE!'**

**But Harry was already ripping open the envelope and pulling out the letter inside, his heart pounding somewhere in the region of his Adam's apple.**

"I wonder who sent it," said Peter.

"I'm guessing it would be the Ministry," replied James. "They would write first. Then Dumbledore and Sirius might write."

**_Dear Mr. Potter,  
We have received intelligence that you performed the Patronus Charm at twenty-three minutes past nine this evening in a Muggle-inhabited area and in the presence of a Muggle._**

"See?" said James. "It's the Ministry."

**_The seventy of this breach of the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery has resulted in your expulsion from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Ministry representatives will be calling at your place of residence shortly to destroy your wand._**

"_WHAT_!" shrieked Lily. "They will not snap my son's wand! He only did magic to combat two dementors! And don't they have to grant a hearing first before expelling students for underage magic?"

"Yes, they do," said Remus, frowning. "Harry had no choice but to do magic, so he can't just be expelled like that and have his wand destroyed."

**_As you have already received an official warning for a previous offence under Section 13 of the International Confederation of Warlocks' Statute of Secrecy, we regret to inform you that your presence is required at a disciplinary hearing at the Ministry of Magic at 9 a.m. on the twelfth of August._**

"If he's got a disciplinary hearing, then why are they expelling him Hogwarts and going to snap his wand right now?" demanded Sirius.

**_Hoping you are well,  
Yours sincerely,  
Mafalda Hopkirk  
Improper Use of Magic Office  
Ministry of Magic_**

**Harry read the letter through twice. He was only vaguely aware of Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia talking. Inside his head, all was icy and numb. One fact had penetrated his consciousness like a paralysing dart. He was expelled from Hogwarts. It was all over. He was never going back.**

"NO!" shouted James. "Dumbledore will straighten things out and remind the Ministry about the law! Students can't be expelled until after a hearing to find him innocent or guilty!"

**He looked up at the Dursleys. Uncle Vernon was purple-faced, shouting, his fists still raised; Aunt Petunia had her arms around Dudley, who was retching again.**

**Harry's temporarily stupefied brain seemed to reawaken. _Ministry representatives will be calling at your place of residence shortly to destroy your wand._ There was only one thing for it. He would have to run - now. Where he was going to go, Harry didn't know, but he was certain of one thing: at Hogwarts or outside it, he needed his wand. In an almost dreamlike state, he pulled his wand out and turned to leave the kitchen.**

"Er, are you sure this is a good idea, Harry?" asked Remus. "Voldemort's back and you're in danger. Besides, I'm sure Dumbledore's at the Ministry now, straightening everything out."

**'Where d'you think you're going?' yelled Uncle Vernon. When Harry didn't reply, he pounded across the kitchen to block the doorway into the hall. 'I haven't finished with you, boy!'**

**'Get out of the way,' said Harry quietly.**

**'You're going to stay here and explain how my son —'**

"It was stupid dementor!" snapped Lily. "Now move out of the way and let my son go!"

**'If you don't get out of the way I'm going to jinx you,' said Harry, raising the wand.**

**'You can't pull that one on me!' snarled Uncle Vernon. 'I know you're not allowed to use it outside that madhouse you call a school!'**

"Well, he's been expelled, so it no longer matters!" snapped Peter.

**'The madhouse has chucked me out,' said Harry. 'So I can do whatever I like. You've got three seconds. One - two -'**

**A resounding CRACK filled the kitchen. Aunt Petunia screamed, 'hide!' Vernon yelled and ducked, but for the third time that night Harry was searching for the source of a disturbance he had not made. He spotted it at once: a dazed and ruffled-looking barn owl was sitting outside on the kitchen sill, having just collided with the closed window.**

"So that was what the noise was," said Sirius. "I wonder who sent the letter."

**Ignoring Uncle Vernon's anguished yell of 'OWLS!' Harry crossed the room at a run and wrenched the window open. The owl stuck out its leg, to which a small roll of parchment was tied, shook its leathers, and took off the moment Harry had taken the letter. Hands shaking, Harry unfurled the second message, which was written very hastily and blotchily in black ink.**

**_Harry —  
Dumbledore's just arrived at the Ministry and he's trying to sort it all out. _**

"See?" asked Remus. "Just as I thought! Dumbledore won't let Harry be expelled."

**_DO NOT LEAVE YOUR AUNT AND UNCLE'S HOUSE. DO NOT DO ANY MORE MAGIC. DO NOT SURRENDER YOUR WAND. Arthur Weasley_**

"Good advice," said Lily. "Listen to Arthur Weasley, Harry."

**Dumbledore was trying to sort it all out… what did that mean? How much power did Dumbledore have to override the Ministry of Magic? Was there a chance that he might be allowed back to Hogwarts, then? **

"Yes!" shouted Sirius. "Dumbledore will remind the Ministry about the law and Harry will be able to prove at the hearing that he used to fight off dementors, so can't be expelled!"

**A small shoot of hope burgeoned in Harry's chest, almost immediately strangled by panic - how was he supposed to refuse to surrender his wand without doing magic? He'd have to duel with the Ministry representatives, and if he did that, he'd be lucky to escape Azkaban, let alone expulsion.**

"You can hide it!" exclaimed Peter.

"No, Harry can't," said James. "The Ministry officials could just summon it."

**His mind was racing… he could run for it and risk being captured by the Ministry, or stay put and wait for them to find him here. He was much more tempted by the former course, but he knew Mr Weasley had his best interests at heart… and after all, Dumbledore had sorted out much worse than this before.**

"Yeah," said Lily. "Stay put and let Dumbledore sort things out."

**'Right,' Harry said, 'I've changed my mind, I'm staying.' He flung himself down at the kitchen table and faced Dudley and Aunt Petunia. The Dursleys appeared taken aback at his abrupt change of mind. Aunt Petunia glanced despairingly at Uncle Vernon. The vein in his purple temple was throbbing worse than ever.**

**'Who are all these ruddy owls from?' he growled.**

"The first was from the Ministry of Magic, the second from Arthur Weasley," replied Sirius.

**The first one was from the Ministry of Magic, expelling me,' said Harry calmly. He was straining his ears to catch any noises outside, in case the Ministry representatives were approaching, and it was easier and quieter to answer Uncle Vernon's questions than to have him start raging and bellowing. 'The second one was from my friend Ron's dad, who works at the Ministry.'**

**'Ministry of Magic?' bellowed Uncle Vernon. 'People like you in government! Oh, this explains everything, everything, no wonder the country's going to the dogs.'**

"It is not!" snapped Peter. "The Ministry of Magic works perfectly well!"

**When Harry did not respond, Uncle Vernon glared at him, then spat out, 'And why have you been expelled?'**

**'Because I did magic.'**

**'AHA!' roared Uncle Vernon, slamming his fist down on top of the fridge, which sprang open; several of Dudley's low-fat snacks toppled out and burst on the floor. 'So you admit it! What did you do to Dudley?'**

"Harry didn't do anything to Dudley!" snapped Remus. "He was fighting the dementors and saving Dudley's life! I mean soul!"

**'Nothing,' said Harry, slightly less calmly. 'That wasn't me -'**

**'Was,' muttered Dudley unexpectedly, and Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia instantly made flapping gestures at Harry to quieten him while they both bent low over Dudley.**

**'Go on, son,' said Uncle Vernon, 'what did he do?'**

**'Tell us, darling,' whispered Aunt Petunia.**

**'Pointed his wand at me,' Dudley mumbled.**

"But Harry didn't use it!" shouted James impatiently.

**'Yeah, I did, but I didn't use -' Harry began angrily, but -**

**'SHUT UP!' roared Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia in unison.**

**'Go on, son,' repeated Uncle Vernon, moustache blowing about furiously.**

**'All went dark,' Dudley said hoarsely, shuddering. 'Everything dark. And then I h-heard… things. Inside m-my head.'**

"That was the dementor!" snapped Peter.

**Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia exchanged looks of utter horror. If their least favourite thing in the world was magic - closely followed by neighbours who cheated more than they did on the hosepipe ban - people who heard voices were definitely in the bottom ten. They obviously thought Dudley was losing his mind.**

**'What sort of things did you hear, Popkin?' breathed Aunt Petunia, very white-faced and with tears in her eyes.**

"His worst memories," muttered Sirius. "If he has any."

**But Dudley seemed incapable of saying. He shuddered again and shook his large blond head, and despite the sense of numb dread that had settled on Harry since the arrival of the first owl, he felt a certain curiosity. Dementors caused a person to relive the worst moments of their life. What would spoiled, pampered, bullying Dudley have been forced to hear?**

**'How come you fell over, son?' said Uncle Vernon, in an unnaturally quiet voice, the kind of voice he might adopt at the bedside of a very ill person.**

**'T-tripped,' said Dudley shakily. 'And then -**

**He gestured at his massive chest. Harry understood. Dudley was remembering the clammy cold that filled the lungs as hope and happiness were sucked out of you.**

**'Horrible,' croaked Dudley. 'Cold. Really cold.'**

**'OK,' said Uncle Vernon, in a voice of forced calm, while Aunt Petunia laid an anxious hand on Dudley's forehead to feel his temperature. 'What happened then, Dudders?'**

**'Felt… felt… felt… as if… as if…'**

"As if he'd never be happy again," supplied James.

**'As if you'd never be happy again,' Harry supplied dully.**

**'Yes,' Dudley whispered, still trembling.**

**'So!' said Uncle Vernon, voice restored to full and considerable volume as he straightened up. 'You put some crackpot spell on my son so he'd hear voices and believe he was - was doomed to misery, or something, did you?'**

"No he didn't!" shouted Lily. "It was an eff-ing dementor!"

**'How many times do I have to tell you?' said Harry, temper and voice both rising. 'It wasn't me! It was a couple of Dementors!'**

**'A couple of - what's this codswallop?'**

**'De - men - tors,' said Harry slowly and clearly. 'Two of them.'**

**'And what the ruddy hell are Dementors?'**

**'They guard the wizard prison, Azkaban,' said Aunt Petunia.**

"How does she know that?" asked Remus. The Marauders looked at Lily, puzzled.

"I suppose she heard me talk about it a couple of times with my parents," said Lily.

**Two seconds of ringing silence followed these words before Aunt Petunia clapped her hand over her mouth as though she had let slip a disgusting swear word. Uncle Vernon was goggling at her. Harrys brain reeled. Mrs. Figg was one thing - but Aunt Petunia?**

**'How d'you know that?' he asked her, astonished.**

**Aunt Petunia looked quite appalled with herself. She glanced at Uncle Vernon in fearful apology, then lowered her hand slightly to reveal her horsy teeth.**

**'I heard - that awful boy - telling her about them - years ago,' she said jerkily.**

"Does she mean that I told you about them, Lily?" asked James.

Lily shrugged. "Probably."

**'If you mean my mum and dad, why don't you use their names?' said Harry loudly, but Aunt Petunia ignored him. She seemed horribly flustered.**

**Harry was stunned. Except for one outburst years ago, in the course of which Aunt Petunia had screamed that Harry's mother had been a freak, he had never heard her mention her sister. He was astounded that she had remembered this scrap of information about the magical world for so long, when she usually put all her energies into pretending it didn't exist.**

"We're astounded too," said Remus.

**Uncle Vernon opened his mouth, closed it again, opened it once more, shut it, then, apparently struggling to remember how to talk, opened it for a third time and croaked, 'So - so - they - er - they - er - they actually exist, do they - er - Dementy-whatsits?'**

"Yeah, they do," said Peter. "And they're called dementors."

**Aunt Petunia nodded.**

**Uncle Vernon looked from Aunt Petunia to Dudley to Harry as if hoping somebody was going to shout 'April Fool!' When nobody did, he opened his mouth yet again, but was spared the struggle to find more words by the arrival of the third owl of the evening. It zoomed through the still-open window like a feathery cannon-ball and landed with a clatter on the kitchen table, causing all three of the Dursleys to jump with fright. Harry tore a second official-looking envelope from the owls beak and ripped it open as the owl swooped back out into the night.**

**'Enough - effing - owls,' muttered Uncle Vernon distractedly, stomping over to the window and slamming it shut again.**

**_Dear Mr. Potter,  
Further to our letter of approximately twenty-two minutes ago, the Ministry of Magic has revised its decision to destroy your wand forthwith. You may retain your wand until your disciplinary hearing on the twelfth of August, at which time an official decision will be taken._**

"That's better," said Sirius. "Obviously Dumbledore was able to sort things out."

**_Following discussions with the Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, the Ministry has agreed that the question of your expulsion will also be decided at that time. You should therefore consider yourself suspended from school pending further enquiries.  
With best wishes,  
Yours sincerely,  
Mafalda Hopkirk  
Improper Use of Magic Office  
Ministry of Magic_**

"Well, that's good too," said Lily. "Harry's not expelled yet. He can prove his innocence at the hearing and everything will be all right."

**Harry read this letter through three times in quick succession. The miserable knot in his chest loosened slightly with the relief of k****nowing he was not yet definitely expelled, though his fears were by no means banished. Everything seemed to hang on this hearing on the twelfth of August.**

**'Well?' said Uncle Vernon, recalling Harry to his surroundings. 'What now? Have they sentenced you to anything? Do your lot have the death penalty?' he added as a hopeful afterthought.**

"We don't have the Death Penalty!" snapped James. "We got rid of it a number of years before the Muggle government decided to do so."

**'I've got to go to a hearing,' said Harry.**

**'And they'll sentence you there?'**

**'I suppose so.'**

**'I won't give up hope, then,' said Uncle Vernon nastily.**

"Oh shut up, Dursley," snapped Sirius. He added to his Dursley list.

**'Well, if that's all,' said Harry, getting to his feet. He was desperate to be alone, to think, perhaps to send a letter to Ron, Hermione or Sirius.**

**'NO, IT RUDDY WELL IS NOT ALL!' bellowed Uncle Vernon. 'SIT BACK DOWN!'**

**'What now?' said Harry impatiently.**

**'DUDLEY!' roared Uncle Vernon. 'I want to know exactly what happened to my son!'**

"He was almost Kissed by a dementor, but Harry was able to conjure a Patronus and drive it and the second one away!" snapped Peter.

**'FINE!' yelled Harry, and in his temper, red and gold sparks shot out of the end of his wand, still clutched in his hand. All three Dursleys flinched, looking terrified. 'Dudley and 1 were in the alleyway between Magnolia Crescent and Wisteria Walk,' said Harry, speaking fast, fighting to control his temper. 'Dudley thought he'd be smart with me, I pulled out my wand but didn't use it. Then two Dementors turned up —'**

**'But what ARE Dementoids?' asked Uncle Vernon furiously. 'What do they DO?'**

"They're beings that suck the happiness out of you and given the chance, will suck out your soul," said Remus.

**'I told you - they suck all the happiness out of you,' said Harry, 'and if they get the chance, they kiss you -'**

**'Kiss you?' said Uncle Vernon, his eyes popping slightly. 'Kiss you?'**

"Yeah, that's what it's called when dementors suck your soul from your mouth," said Peter, shuddering.

**'It's what they call it when they suck the soul out of your mouth.'**

**Aunt Petunia uttered a soft scream.  
'His soul? They didn't take - he's still got his -'**

"Of course they didn't get his soul!" snapped James. "You can tell if they had!"

**She seized Dudley by the shoulders and shook him, as though testing to see whether she could hear his soul rattling around inside him.**

**'Of course they didn't get his soul, you'd know if they had,' said Harry, exasperated.**

**'Fought 'em off, did you, son?' said Uncle Vernon loudly, with the appearance of a man struggling to bring the conversation back on to a plane he understood. 'Gave 'em the old one-two, did you?'**

"You can't give a Dementor 'the old one-two'!" snapped Sirius, exasperated.

**'You can't give a Dementor the old one-two,' said Harry through clenched teeth.**

**'Why's he all right, then?' blustered Uncle Vernon. 'Why isn't he all empty, then?'**

**'Because I used the Patronus -'**

**WHOOSH. With a clattering, a whirring of wings and a soft fall of dust, a fourth owl came shooting out of the kitchen fireplace.**

**'FOR GOD'S SAKE!' roared Uncle Vernon, pulling great clumps of hair out of his moustache, something he hadn't been driven to do in a long time. 'I WILL NOT HAVE OWLS HERE, I WILL NOT TOLERATE THIS, I TELL YOU!'**

"You can't stop owls from showing up!" exclaimed Lily.

**But Harry was already pulling a roll of parchment from the owl's leg. He was so convinced that this letter had to be from Dumbledore, explaining everything - the Dementors, Mrs Figg, what the Ministry was up to, how he, Dumbledore, intended to sort everything out - that for the first time in his life he was disappointed to see Sirius's handwriting. **

"What!" exclaimed Sirius. "I'm hurt! You don't think I can't explain things, Harry?"

"Well, Harry probably thinks Dumbledore is the only one who can properly explain things," said Remus. "but I expect Dumbledore's too busy to write to Harry."

**Ignoring Uncle Vernon's ongoing rant about owls, and narrowing his eyes against a second cloud of dust as the most recent owl look off back up the chimney, Harry read Sirius's message.**

**_Arthur has just told us what's happened. Don't leave the house again, whatever you do._**

"That's all I wrote?" asked Sirius, frowning. "Why didn't I write more?"

"You probably weren't allowed to explain anything in case the letter was intercepted," replied Lily. "And you likely wanted Harry to be safe first."

**Harry found this such an inadequate response to everything that had happened tonight that he turned the piece of parchment over, looking for the rest of the letter, but there was nothing else.**

**And now his temper was rising again. Wasn't anybody going to say 'well done' for fighting off two Dementors single-handed? Both Mr. Weasley and Sirius were acting as though he'd misbehaved, and were saving their tellings-off until they could ascertain how much damage had been done.**

"You're in danger!" exclaimed James. "Nobody's going to be saying well-done for what you did until they're certain you're safe and out of trouble!"

**'… a peck, I mean, pack of owls shooting in and out of my house. I won't have it, boy, 1 won't -'**

**'I can't stop the owls coming,' Harry snapped, crushing Sirius's letter in his fist.**

**'I want the truth about what happened tonight!' barked Uncle Vernon. 'If it was Demenders who hurt Dudley, how come you've been expelled? You did you-know-what, you've admitted it!'**

"It was the only to fight off the Dementors," snapped Peter. "And can't you get the name right?"

**Harry took a deep, steadying breath. His head was beginning to ache again. He wanted more than anything to get out of the kitchen, and away from the Dursleys.**

**'I did the Patronus Charm to get rid of the Dementors,' he said, forcing himself to remain calm. 'It's the only thing that works against them.'**

**'But what were Dementoids doing in Little Whinging?' said Uncle Vernon in an outraged tone.**

**'Couldn't tell you,' said Harry wearily. 'No idea.'**

"It could have been Voldemort who sent them," said Remus. Peter flinched and Remus said, sighing, "Sorry, Peter."

**His head was pounding in the glare of the strip-lighting now. His anger was ebbing away. He felt drained, exhausted. The Dursleys were all staring at him.**

**'It's you,' said Uncle Vernon forcefully. 'It's got something to do with you, boy, I know it. Why else would they turn up here? Why else would they be down that alleyway? You've got to be the only - the only -' Evidently, he couldn't bring himself to say the word 'wizard'. 'The only you-know-what for miles.'**

"Yeah," said James, frowning. "But why would Vol-er Moldywart, send Dementors after Harry when he hasn't done anything big so far?"

**'I don't know why they were here.'**

**But at Uncle Vernon's words, Harry's exhausted brain had ground back into action. Why had the Dementors come to Little Whinging? How could it be coincidence that they had arrived in the alleyway where Harry was? Had they been sent? Had the Ministry of Magic lost control of the Dementors? Had they deserted Azkaban and joined Voldemort, as Dumbledore had predicted they would?**

"Maybe," said Lily. "But wouldn't it be in the paper if Dementors suddenly disappeared from Azkaban? Even if the Ministry isn't accepting the fact that Moldywart's back, they'd still mention it if the Dementors deserted."

**'These Demembers guard some weirdo prison?' asked Uncle Vernon, lumbering along in the wake of Harry's train of thought.**

**'Yes,' said Harry.**

**If only his head would stop hurting, if only he could just leave the kitchen and get to his dark bedroom and think…**

**'Oho! They were coming to arrest you!' said Uncle Vernon, with the triumphant air of a man reaching an unassailable conclusion. 'That's it, isn't it, boy? You're on the run from the law!'**

"Harry's not on the run from the law!" snapped Peter. "Moldywart probably sent the Dementors to attack Harry!"

**'Of course I'm not,' said Harry, shaking his head as though to scare off a fly, his mind racing now.**

**'Then why -?'**

**'He must have sent them,' said Harry quietly, more to himself than to Uncle Vernon.**

**'What's that? Who must have sent them?'**

**'Lord Voldemort,' said Harry.**

**He registered dimly how strange it was that the Dursleys, who flinched, winced and squawked if they heard words like 'wizard', 'magic' or 'wand', could hear the name of the most evil wizard of all time without the slightest tremor.**

"Well, they're Muggles," said Sirius, shrugging.

**'Lord - hang on,' said Uncle Vernon, his face screwed up, a look of dawning comprehension coming into his piggy eyes. 'I've heard that name… that was the one who —'**

**'Murdered my parents, yes,' Harry said dully.**

**'But he's gone,' said Uncle Vernon impatiently, without the slightest sign that the murder of Harry's parents might be a painful topic. 'That giant bloke said so. He's gone.'**

"For thirteen years," muttered James. "Then he came back more than a month ago."

**'He's back,' said Harry heavily.**

**It felt very strange to be standing here in Aunt Petunia's surgically clean kitchen, beside the top-of-the-range fridge and the wide-screen television, talking calmly of Lord Voldemort to Uncle Vernon. The arrival of the Dementors in Little Whinging seemed to have breached the great, invisible wall that divided the relentlessly non-magical world of Privet Drive and the world beyond, Harry's two lives had somehow become fused and everything had been turned upside-down; the Dursleys were asking for details about the magical world, and Mrs. Figg knew Albus Dumbledore; Dementors were soaring around Little Whinging, and he might never return to Hogwarts. Harry's head throbbed more painfully.**

"My poor son," said Lily sadly. "If only I were there to help him deal with this."

**'Back?' whispered Aunt Petunia.**

**She was looking at Harry as she had never looked at him before. And all of a sudden, for the very first time in his life, Harry fully appreciated that Aunt Petunia was his mother's sister. He could not have said why this hit him so very powerfully at this moment. All he knew was that he was not the only person in the room who had an inkling of what Lord Voldemort being back might mean. **

"Well, she does know quite a bit of the wizarding world from hearing all those discussions at the dinner table during the holidays," said Lily.

**Aunt Petunia had never in her life looked at him like that before. Her large, pale eyes (so unlike her sister's) were not narrowed in dislike or anger, they were wide and fearful. The furious pretence that Aunt Petunia had maintained all Harry's life - that there was no magic and no world other than the world she inhabited with Uncle Vernon - seemed to have fallen away.**

**'Yes,' Harry said, talking directly to Aunt Petunia now. 'He came back a month ago. I saw him.'**

**Her hands found Dudley's massive leather-clad shoulders and clutched them.**

**'Hang on,' said Uncle Vernon, looking from his wife to Harry and back again, apparently dazed and confused by the unprecedented understanding that seemed to have sprung up between them. 'Hang on. This Lord Voldything's back, you say.'**

"Yes, Voldemort's back!" shouted Remus. Peter flinched, but the others paid no attention to it.

**'Yes.'**

**'The one who murdered your parents.'**

**'Yes.'**

**'And now he's sending Dismembers after you?'**

"It's Dementors, and it looks like it!" snapped James. "Can't Dursley get the term right?"

**'Looks like it,' said Harry.**

**'I see,' said Uncle Vernon, looking from his white-faced wife to Harry and hitching up his trousers. He seemed to be swelling, his great purple face stretching before Harry's eyes. 'Well, that settles it,' he said, his shirt front straining as he inflated himself, 'you can get out of this house, boy!'**

"_What_?!" they all asked, staring at the book in shock.

Peter said, "But he can't kick Harry out! Harry's supposed to stay in the house!" Sirius picked up quill and added to his Dursley list.

**'What?' said Harry.**

**'You heard me - OUT!' Uncle Vernon bellowed, and even Aunt Petunia and Dudley jumped. 'OUT! OUT! I should've done this years ago! Owls treating the place like a rest home, puddings exploding, half the lounge destroyed, Dudley's tail, Marge bobbing around on the ceiling and that flying Ford Anglia - OUT! OUT! You've had it! You're history! You're not staying here if some loony's after you, you're not endangering my wife and son, you're not bringing trouble down on us. If you're going the same way as your useless parents, I've had it! OUT!'**

"You can't force Harry out!" shouted Lily. "It's not safe for him to leave, except to go to Hogwarts, and he can't do that now!"

**Harry stood rooted to the spot. The letters from the Ministry, Mr. Weasley and Sirius were all crushed in his left hand. _Don't leave the house again, whatever you do. DO NOT LEAVE YOUR AUNT AND UNCLE'S HOUSE._**

**'You heard me!' said Uncle Vernon, bending forwards now, his massive purple face coming so close to Harry's, he actually felt flecks of spit hit his face. 'Get going! You were all keen to leave half an hour ago! I'm right behind you! Get out and never darken our doorstep again! Why we ever kept you in the first place, I don't know, Marge was right, it should have been the orphanage. **

"Well, the orphanage would be a million times better than your home!" snapped James.

**We were too damn soft for our own good, thought we could squash it out of you, thought we could turn you normal, but you've been rotten from the beginning and I've had enough - owls!'**

**The fifth owl zoomed down the chimney so fast it actually hit the floor before zooming into the air again with a loud screech. Harry raised his hand to seize the letter, which was in a scarlet envelope, but it soared straight over his head, flying directly at Aunt Petunia, who let out a scream and ducked, her arms over her face. The owl dropped the red envelope on her head, turned, and flew straight back up the chimney.**

"Did someone send Harry or the Dursleys a Howler?" asked Sirius incredulously.

**Harry darted forwards to pick up the letter, but Aunt Petunia beat him to it.**

**'You can open it if you like,' said Harry, 'but I'll hear what it says anyway. That's a Howler.'**

**'Let go of it, Petunia!' roared Uncle Vernon. 'Don't touch it, it could be dangerous!'**

**'It's addressed to me,' said Aunt Petunia in a shaking voice. 'It's addressed to me, Vernon, look! Mrs. Petunia Dursley, The Kitchen, Number Four, Privet Drive -'**

"Who sent my sister a Howler?" asked Lily, shocked.

"Dumbledore?" suggested Remus. "Only Hogwarts would give an exact address like that."

**She caught her breath, horrified. The red envelope had begun to smoke.**

**'Open it!' Harry urged her. 'Get it over with! It'll happen anyway.'**

**'No.'**

"Even if you don't open it, you'll hear what it says," said James,

**Aunt Petunia's hand was trembling. She looked wildly around the kitchen as though looking for an escape route, but too late -the envelope burst into flames. Aunt Petunia screamed and dropped it.**

**An awful voice filled the kitchen, echoing in the confined space, issuing from the burning letter on the table.**

**'_Remember my last, Petunia_.'**

"Who sent it, and what is it referring to?" asked Peter.

"It could be Dumbledore," said Sirius. "But what it's referring to, I have no clue." The others didn't either.

**Aunt Petunia looked as though she might faint. She sank into the chair beside Dudley, her face in her hands. The remains of the envelope smouldered into ash in the silence.**

**'What is this?' Uncle Vernon said hoarsely. 'What - I don't -Petunia?'**

**Aunt Petunia said nothing. Dudley was staring stupidly at his mother, his mouth hanging open. The silence spiralled horribly. Harry was watching his aunt, utterly bewildered, his head throbbing fit to burst.**

"We're all very bewildered, too," said James.

**'Petunia, dear?' said Uncle Vernon timidly. 'P-Petunia?'**

**She raised her head. She was still trembling. She swallowed.**

**'The boy - the boy will have to stay, Vernon,' she said weakly.**

"At least my sister has some sense," said Lily. "Or that Howler put some sense into her."

**'W-what?'**

**'He stays,' she said. She was not looking at Harry. She got to her feet again.**

**'He… but Petunia…'**

**'If we throw him out, the neighbours will talk,' she said. She was rapidly regaining her usual brisk, snappish manner, though she was still very pale. 'They'll ask awkward questions, they'll want to know where he's gone. We'll have to keep him.'**

"That reason makes sense," said Sirius bitterly. "Now Dursley won't be able to throw Harry out."

**Uncle Vernon was deflating like an old tyre.**

**'But Petunia, dear -**

**Aunt Petunia ignored him. She turned to Harry. 'You're to stay in your room,' she said. 'You're not to leave the house. Now get to bed.' **

**Harry didn't move. 'Who was that Howler from?'**

"Probably Dumbledore, but it could be someone else," said Remus.

**'Don't ask questions,' Aunt Petunia snapped. **

**'Are you in touch with wizards?'**

**'I told you to get to bed!'**

**'What did it mean? Remember the last what?'**

"We are curious to know," said Peter. "Why can't Petunia tell Harry."

**'Go to bed!'**

**'How come -?'**

**'YOU HEARD YOUR AUNT, NOW GO UP TO BED!'**

"And Harry will have to listen to Dursley and go to bed," muttered James. "Well, the chapter's over, and nothing really got explained." Lily vounteered to read the third chapter and took the book from him.


	3. The Advance Guard

Author's Note: Sorry that it has taken awhile to update. My grandmother celebrated her birthday the past weekend and I had to vist her. Also, my sister didn't finish betaing this until today. Or rather, she didn't send it to me until this morning.

**CHAPTER THREE **

**The Advance Guard**

They exchanged puzzled looks. "The Advance Guard?" asked Peter. "What's that?"

"No clue," responded Sirius, shrugging.

**_I've just been attacked by Dementors and I might be expelled from Hogwarts. I want to know what's going on and when I'm going to get out of here._**

**Harry copied these words on to three separate pieces of parchment the moment he reached the desk in his dark bedroom. He addressed the first to Sirius, the second to Ron and the third to Hermione. His owl, Hedwig, was off hunting; her cage stood empty on the desk. Harry paced the bedroom waiting for her to come back, his head pounding, his brain too busy for sleep even though his eyes stung and itched with tiredness. His back ached from hauling Dudley home, and the two lumps on his head where the window and Dudley had hit him were throbbing painfully.**

"Poor Harry," said Lily. "His head must hurt terribly."

**Up and down he paced, consumed with anger and frustration, grinding his teeth and clenching his fists, casting angry looks out at the empty, star-strewn sky every time he passed the window. Dementors sent to get him, Mrs. Figg and Mundungus Fletcher tailing him in secret, then suspension from Hogwarts and a hearing at the Ministry of Magic - and still no one was telling him what was going on.**

"Yeah, why can't someone tell Harry something about what's going on?" demanded James.

**And what, what, had that Howler been about? Whose voice had echoed so horribly, so menacingly, through the kitchen?**

"We have no clue," said Remus. "But the address seems to hint toward Dumbledore, though it could be almost anyone."

**Why was he still trapped here without information? Why was everyone treating him like some naughty kid? _Don't do any more magic, stay in the house…_**

"They don't mean it!" exclaimed Lily. "They're just all very concerned about your safety and don't want you getting into any more trouble with the Ministry."

**He kicked his school trunk as he passed it, but far from relieving his anger he felt worse, as he now had a sharp pain in his toe to deal with in addition to the pain in the rest of his body.**

**Just as he limped past the window, Hedwig soared through it with a soft rustle of wings like a small ghost.**

**'About time!' Harry snarled, as she landed lightly on top of her cage. 'You can put that down, I've got work for you!' **

"Hey, don't take your frustrations out on your innocent Hedwig!" scolded Remus.

**Hedwig's large, round, amber eyes gazed at him reproachfully over the dead frog clamped in her beak.**

**'Come here,' said Harry, picking up the three small rolls of parchment and a leather thong and tying the scrolls to her scaly leg. 'Take these straight to Sirius, Ron and Hermione and don't come back here without good long replies. Keep pecking them till they've written decent-length answers if you've got to. Understand?'**

"But what if Ron and Hermione aren't allowed to explain anything?" asked James.

**Hedwig gave a muffled hooting noise, her beak still full of frog.**

**'Get going, then,' said Harry.**

**She took off immediately. The moment she'd gone, Harry threw himself down on his bed without undressing and stared at the dark ceiling. In addition to every other miserable feeling, he now felt guilty that he'd been irritable with Hedwig; she was the only friend he had at number four, Privet Drive. But he'd make it up to her when she came back with the answers from Sirius, Ron and Hermione.**

"Well, that's good," said Peter. "Harry realizes he shouldn't have snapped at Hedwig and wants to make amends."

**They were bound to write back quickly; they couldn't possibly ignore a Dementor attack. He'd probably wake up tomorrow to three fat letters full of sympathy and plans for his immediate removal to The Burrow. And with that comforting idea, sleep rolled over him, stifling all further thought.**

**But Hedwig didn't return next morning. **

"Apparently they're not allowed to write anything of information," said Sirius. "So they're not bothering to write at all for the moment."

**Harry spent the day in his bedroom, leaving it only to go to the bathroom. Three times that day Aunt Petunia shoved food into his room through the cat-flap Uncle Vernon had installed three summers ago. Every time Harry heard her approaching he tried to question her about the Howler, but he might as well have interrogated the doorknob for all the answers he got. Otherwise, the Dursleys kept well clear of his bedroom. Harry couldn't see the point of forcing his company on them; another row would achieve nothing except perhaps make him so angry he'd perform more illegal magic.**

"Yeah, and you don't need any more of that happening," said James.

**So it went on for three whole days. Harry was alternately filled with restless energy that made him unable to settle to anything, during which time he paced his bedroom, furious at the whole lot of them for leaving him to stew in this mess; and with a lethargy so complete that he could lie on his bed for an hour at a time, staring dazedly into space, aching with dread at the thought of the Ministry hearing.**

"Don't be!" exclaimed Lily. "They can't possibly find you guilty and expell you from Hogwarts! You'll explain the situation and let you off!"

**What if they ruled against him? What if he was expelled and his wand was snapped in half? What would he do, where would he go? He could not return to living full-time with the Dursleys, not now he knew the other world, the one to which he really belonged. Might he be able to move into Sirius's house, as Sirius had suggested a year ago, before he had been forced to flee from the Ministry? **

"If you're found guilty, which I doubt will happen, you definitely can move in with me, Harry!" exclaimed Sirius.

**Would Harry be allowed to live there alone, given that he was still underage? Or would the matter of where he went next be decided for him? Had his breach of the International Statute of Secrecy been severe enough to land him in a cell in Azkaban?**

"Surely not!" exclaimed Peter, looking horrified. "Harry can't be sent to Azkaban for fighting off dementors!"

**Whenever this thought occurred, Harry invariably slid off his bed and began pacing again.**

**On the fourth night after Hedwig's departure Harry was lying in one of his apathetic phases, staring at the ceiling, his exhausted mind quite blank, when his uncle entered his bedroom. Harry looked slowly around at him. Uncle Vernon was wearing his best suit and an expression of enormous smugness.**

"Oh, is he going somewhere?" asked Remus. "I hope he is."

**'We're going out,' he said.**

**'Sorry?'**

**'We - that is to say, your aunt, Dudley and I - are going out.'**

"Oh, that's wonderful!" exclaimed Peter. "Harry gets to be away from his horrid relatives!"

**'Fine,' said Harry dully, looking back at the ceiling.**

**'You are not to leave your bedroom while we are away.'**

**'OK.'**

**'You are not to touch the television, the stereo, or any of our possessions.'**

"Like Harry would," said Sirius. "And what's a stereo?"

"Something Muggles use to play music," responded Lily.

**'Right.'**

**'You are not to steal food from the fridge.'**

**'OK.'**

**'I am going to lock your door.'**

"Hey, do you intend to starve Harry?" demanded James. "Or prevent him from using the bathroom?"

"I imagine that the Dursleys are only going out for the evening, so Harry'll be all right," said Remus.

**'You do that.'**

"I can't believe Harry can just accept all this so calmly!" exclaimed Lily.

**Uncle Vernon glared at Harry, clearly suspicious of this lack of argument, then stomped out of the room and closed the door behind him. Harry heard the key turn in the lock and Uncle Vernon's footsteps walking heavily down the stairs. A few minutes later he heard the slamming of car doors, the rumble of an engine, and the unmistakeable sound of the car sweeping out of the drive.**

"Good, they're gone," said Sirius.

**Harry had no particular feeling about the Dursleys leaving. It made no difference to him whether they were in the house or not. He could not even summon the energy to get up and turn on his bedroom light. The room grew steadily darker around him as he lay listening to the night sounds through the window he kept open all the time, waiting for the blessed moment when Hedwig returned. The empty house creaked around him. The pipes gurgled. Harry lay there in a kind of stupor, thinking of nothing, suspended in misery.**

"Why is Harry's summer so bad?" asked James. "It's even worse than when Harry was locked in his room for a week during the second book."

**Then, quite distinctly, he heard a crash in the kitchen below. **

"What happened?" asked Peter. "The Dursleys couldn't have returned so soon, could they?"

"I don't think so," said Lily. "Harry didn't hear their car. I hope it's not thieves or anything."

**He sat bolt upright, listening intently. The Dursleys couldn't be back, it was much too soon, and in any case he hadn't heard their car.**

**There was silence for a few seconds, then voices. Burglars, he thought, sliding off the bed on to his feet - but a split second later it occurred to him that burglars would keep their voices down, and whoever was moving around in the kitchen was certainly not troubling to do so.**

"Well, if it's not burglars, then who could it be?" asked Remus.

**He snatched up his wand from the bedside table and stood facing his bedroom door, listening with all his might. Next moment, he jumped as the lock gave a loud click and his door swung open. Harry stood motionless, staring through the open doorway at the dark upstairs landing, straining his ears for further sounds, but none came. He hesitated for a moment, then moved swiftly and silently out of his room to the head of the stairs.**

"Be careful, Harry!" cried Lily. "You don't want to get hurt!"

**His heart shot upwards into his throat. There were people standing in the shadowy hall below, silhouetted against the streetlight glowing through the glass door; eight or nine of them, all, as far as he could see, looking up at him.**

**'Lower your wand, boy, before you take someone's eye out,' said a low, growling voice.**

"Hey, that sounds like Moody's voice!" exclaimed James. "But is it really Moody, or someone using Polyjuice Potion?"

**Harry's heart was thumping uncontrollably. He knew that voice, but he did not lower his wand.**

**'Professor Moody?' he said uncertainly.**

**'I don't know so much about "Professor",' growled the voice, 'never got round to much teaching, did I? Get down here, we want to see you properly.'**

"We?" asked Peter. "Who are the other people with Moody?"

**Harry lowered his wand slightly but did not relax his grip on it, nor did he move. He had very good reason to be suspicious. He had recently spent nine months in what he had thought was Mad-Eye Moody's company only to find out that it wasn't Moody at all, but an impostor; an impostor, moreover, who had tried to kill Harry before being unmasked. **

"And Crouch Jr. deserved to have the Dememtor's Kiss, but it could have happened until after he could have confessed to the Ministry!" snapped Sirius.

**But before he could make a decision about what to do next, a second, slightly hoarse voice floated upstairs.**

**'It's all right, Harry. We've come to take you away.'**

**Harry's heart leapt. He knew that voice, too, though he hadn't heard it for over a year.**

**'P-Professor Lupin?' he said disbelievingly. 'Is that you?'**

"Oh, I'm there!" exclaimed Remus, smiling. "I suppose we're there to take Harry away."

**'Why are we all standing in the dark?' said a third voice, this one completely unfamiliar, a woman's. 'Lumos.'**

**A wand-tip flared, illuminating the hall with magical light. Harry blinked. The people below were crowded around the foot of the stairs, gazing up at him intently, some craning their heads for a better look.**

**Remus Lupin stood nearest to him. Though still quite young, Lupin looked tired and rather ill; he had more grey hairs than when Harry had last said goodbye to him and his robes were more patched and shabbier than ever. **

"Moony, what happened to you?" asked James, concerned. "How could your robes be in such a state? And gray hair?"

"I have gray hair now," pointed out Remus calmly. "I suppose the transformations are taking a toll on me, even with the Wolfsbane Potion. And no doubt I haven't been able to find employment after I resigned from teaching, so I can't afford new robes."

**Nevertheless, he was smiling broadly at Harry, who tried to smile back despite his state of shock.**

**'Oooh, he looks just like I thought he would,' said the witch who was holding her lit wand aloft. She looked the youngest there; she had a pale heart-shaped face, dark twinkling eyes, and short spiky hair that was a violent shade of violet. 'Wotcher, Harry!'**

"Andie has a pale, heart-shaped face," remarked Sirius. "But I don't think that could be her. She doesn't go around with purple hair. She just keeps it to her normal hair color unless she has to use her Metamorphmagus powers for a disguise or something."

**'Yeah, I see what you mean, Remus,' said a bald black wizard standing furthest back - he had a deep, slow voice and wore a single gold hoop in his ear - 'he looks exactly like James.'**

"That guy sounds familar," said Lily. "Maybe he was at Hogwarts a few year above us."

**'Except the eyes,' said a wheezy-voiced, silver-haired wizard at the back. 'Lily's eyes.'**

**Mad-Eye Moody, who had long grizzled grey hair and a large chunk missing from his nose, was squinting suspiciously at Harry through his mismatched eyes. One eye was small, dark and beady, the other large, round and electric blue - the magical eye that could see through walls, doors and the back of Moody's own head. 'Are you quite sure it's him, Lupin?' he growled. 'It'd be a nice lookout if we bring back some Death Eater impersonating him. We ought to ask him something only the real Potter would know. Unless anyone brought any Veritaserum?'**

"I don't think anyone would have thought to bring Veritaserum," said Peter. "So you'll just have to ask a question."

**'Harry, what form does your Patronus take?' Lupin asked. **

**'A stag,' said Harry nervously. **

**'That's him, Mad-Eye,' said Lupin.**

**Very conscious of everybody still staring at him, Harry descended the stairs, stowing his wand in the back pocket of his jeans as he came.**

**'Don't put your wand there, boy!' roared Moody. 'What if it ignited? Better wizards than you have lost buttocks, you know!'**

**'Who d'you know who's lost a buttock?' the violet-haired woman asked Mad-Eye interestedly.**

"Probably himself," muttered James. Everyone chuckled.

**'Never you mind, you just keep your wand out of your back pocket!' growled Mad-Eye. 'Elementary wand-safety, nobody bothers about it any more.' He stumped off towards the kitchen. 'And I saw that,' he added irritably, as the woman rolled her eyes towards the ceiling.**

"I like this woman," said Sirius. "She's cool and I wouldn't mind dating her."

"Sirius, you already have a girlfriend," said Lily. "Beth Potter, James' cousin. And this woman is older than you."

"No she isn't," said Sirius. "I'd be older than her. In the books, anyway." Lily sighed and threw up her hands.

**Lupin held out his hand and shook Harry's. 'How are you?' he asked, looking closely at Harry. **

**'F-fine…'**

**Harry could hardly believe this was real. Four weeks with nothing, not the tiniest hint of a plan to remove him from Privet Drive, and suddenly a whole bunch of wizards was standing matter-of-factly in the house as though this was a long-standing arrangement. **

"They probably didn't want to write anything about it in case it got intercepted," said Remus. "That way no Death Eaters would be able to ambush them or something."

**He glanced at the people surrounding Lupin; they were still gazing avidly at him. He felt very conscious of the fact that he had not combed his hair for four days.**

**'I'm - you're really lucky the Dursleys are out…' he mumbled.**

**'Lucky, ha!' said the violet-haired woman. 'It was me who lured them out of the way. Sent a letter by Muggle post telling them they'd been short-listed for the All-England Best Kept Suburban Lawn Competition. They're heading off to the prize-giving right now… or they think they are.'**

They chuckled and Peter said, "She must be Muggleborn if she could send a letter without the Dursleys suspecting anything odd."

**Harry had a fleeting vision of Uncle Vernon's face when he realised there was no All-England Best Kept Suburban Lawn Competition.**

They all laughed.

**'We are leaving, aren't we?' he asked. 'Soon?'**

**'Almost at once,' said Lupin, 'we're just waiting for the all-clear.'**

**'Where are we going? The Burrow?' Harry asked hopefully.**

**'Not The Burrow, no,' said Lupin, motioning Harry towards the kitchen; the little knot of wizards followed, all still eyeing Harry curiously. 'Too risky. We've set up Headquarters somewhere undetectable. It's taken a while…'**

"Headquarters?" asked Remus. "For what? And where would they be?"

**Mad-Eye Moody was now sitting at the kitchen table swigging from a hip flask, his magical eye spinning in all directions, taking in the Dursleys' many labour-saving appliances.**

**'This is Alastor Moody, Harry.' Lupin continued, pointing towards Moody.**

**'Yeah, I know,' said Harry uncomfortably. It felt odd to be introduced to somebody he'd thought he'd known for a year.**

**'And this is Nymphadora -'**

"Nymphadora?" asked Sirius incredulously. "As in my cousin? The daughter of Andie and Ted Tonks? I can't believe she's all grown up. She's just a little girl of four right now."

**'Don't call me Nymphadora, Remus,' said the young witch with a shudder, 'it's Tonks.'**

**'Nymphadora Tonks, who prefers to be known by her surname only,' finished Lupin.**

"Well, I would too if my mother gave me a name like Nymphadora," said Lily, shuddering.

Sirius nodded. "I don't know what Andie was thinking when she named her daughter that. Ted liked the names Jessica and Crystal, but Andie insisted on Nymphadora. I call her Dora and Ted does too."

**'So would you if your fool of a mother had called you Nymphadora,' muttered Tonks.**

James chuckled. "Well, now that the young witch turns out to be your cousin, you can't date her, Sirius."

"I didn't actually mean it," snapped Sirius, annoyed. "I am dating Beth, after all, and I really like her. And you must be mad if you think I'm going to date a four-year old. Or rather, someone that's at least ten years younger than me. Remus might, though."

Remus gave Sirius a look. "Are you mad? Do you really think I'd go and date a girl that's years younger than me? And what girl would have me with my condition? Well, Lily and Beth wouldn't mind, but they're already taken."

**'And this is Kingsley Shacklebolt.'**

"No wonder he sounded familar," said Remus. "Kingsley was in Gryffindor and three or four years above us."

**He indicated the tall black wizard, who bowed. 'Elphias Doge.' The wheezy-voiced wizard nodded. 'Dedalus Diggle -'**

"Harry met him already," said James. "Once when he bowed to Harry in a shop and another time at the Leaky Cauldron. But why is Diggle there to help take Harry away? And the other wizards?'

"Maybe they're part of some group," suggested Peter.

"Maybe," said Lily. "But I don't see why they all have to be there. Moody and Remus, yes, but why Sirius' cousin and Kingsley and the rest? Unless Dumbledore wants Harry to be safe and asked for a large group to protect Harry when they take him to Headquarters."

**'We've met before,' squeaked the excitable Diggle, dropping his violet-coloured top hat.**

**'Emmeline Vance.' **

"Emmeline?" asked Lily, blinking. "She was a Gryffindor prefect and three years above us. She helped me in Transfiguration in my third year."

**A stately-looking witch in an emerald green shawl inclined her head. 'Sturgis Podmore.' **

"Don't know who he is," said James. "Though I've heard of his family."

**A square-jawed wizard with thick straw-coloured hair winked. 'And Hestia Jones.' A pink-cheeked, black-haired witch waved from next to the toaster.**

"I dated her last year," commented Sirius.

"Yeah, for three weeks," said Remus. "Then you ended it and started dating Sarah Bell."

"Oh yeah," said Sirius, remembering. "Then I broke up with Sarah after a month and asked Amy Huang out."

"I'm amazed you're still with Beth," said James. "The longest you were with a girl in the past was almost two months. You've been dating my cousin for almost four months now, five if you count the time you spent with her during the summer."

"That's because I'm serious about her," answered Sirius. "Not that I wasn't Sirius before-" There were groans at his pun-"but I really like Beth and my feelings for her are along the lines of your feelings with Lily, James."

**Harry inclined his head awkwardly at each of them as they were introduced. He wished they would look at something other than him; it was as though he had suddenly been ushered on-stage. He also wondered why so many of them were there.**

"We're wondering too," said Peter.

**'A surprising number of people volunteered to come and get you,' said Lupin, as though he had read Harry's mind; the corners of his mouth twitched slightly.**

**'Yeah, well, the more the better,' said Moody darkly. 'We're your guard, Potter.'**

"Ah, so that explains the chapter title," said Lily,

**'We're just waiting for the signal to tell us it's safe to set off,' said Lupin, glancing out of the kitchen window. 'We've got about fifteen minutes.'**

**'Very clean, aren't they, these Muggles?' said the witch called Tonks, who was looking around the kitchen with great interest. 'My dad's Muggle-born and he's a right old slob. I suppose it varies, just as it does with wizards?'**

"Yeah," said Sirius. "Ted is a bit of a slob, but Andie's good with household spells, so it doesn't matter so much."

**'Er - yeah,' said Harry. 'Look -' he turned back to Lupin, 'what's going on, I haven't heard anything from anyone, what's Vol—?'**

**Several of the witches and wizards made odd hissing noises; Dedalus Diggle dropped his hat again and Moody growled, 'Shut up!'**

"What?" asked James. "Why can't Harry discuss Voldemort?" Peter flinched.

**'What?' said Harry.**

**'We're not discussing anything here, it's too risky,' said Moody, turning his normal eye on Harry. **

"Oh, so that's why," said Peter. "But why would it be too risky?" The others shrugged.

**His magical eye remained focused on the ceiling. 'Damn it,' he added angrily, putting a hand up to the magical eye, 'it keeps getting stuck - ever since that scum wore it.'**

**And with a nasty squelching sound much like a plunger being pulled from a sink, he popped out his eye.**

"That's disgusting," said Remus, wincing. The others nodded in agreement.

**'Mad-Eye, you do know that's disgusting, don't you?' said Tonks conversationally.**

**'Get me a glass of water, would you, Harry,' requested Moody.**

**Harry crossed to the dishwasher, took out a clean glass and filled it with water at the sink, still watched eagerly by the band of wizards. Their relentless staring was starting to annoy him.**

"Why do they have to stare at them?" demanded Peter.

**'Cheers,' said Moody, when Harry handed him the glass. He dropped the magical eyeball into the water and prodded it up and down; the eye whizzed around, staring at them all in turn. 'I want three hundred and sixty degrees visibility on the return journey.'**

**'How're we getting - wherever we're going?' Harry asked.**

**'Brooms,' said Lupin. 'Only way. You're too young to Apparate, they'll be watching the Floo Network and it's more than our life's worth to set up an unauthorised Portkey.'**

**'Remus says you're a good flier,' said Kingsley Shacklebolt in his deep voice.**

"_Good_?" demanded James. "That's an understatement. Harry's great! He might even be better than me, seeing as how he made the house team in in his first year!"

**'He's excellent,' said Lupin, who was checking his watch. 'Anyway, you'd better go and get packed, Harry, we want to be ready to go when the signal comes.'**

**'I'll come and help you,' said Tonks brightly.**

"That's good," said Sirius. "Harry and Dora can get to know each other better."

**She followed Harry back into the hall and up the stairs, looking around with much curiosity and interest.**

**'Funny place,' she said. 'It's a bit too clean, d'you know what I mean? Bit unnatural. Oh, this is better,' she added, as they entered Harry's bedroom and he turned on the light.**

"So obviously, Harry's room is messy, unlike the rest of the house," said Remus.

**His room was certainly much messier than the rest of the house. Confined to it for four days in a very bad mood, Harry had not bothered tidying up after himself. Most of the books he owned were strewn over the floor where he'd tried to distract himself with each in turn and thrown it aside; Hedwig's cage needed cleaning out and was starting to smell; and his trunk lay open, revealing a jumbled mixture of Muggle clothes and wizards' robes that had spilled on to the floor around it.**

"Harry James Potter, how can you be such a slob?" demanded Lily, frowning. "You're worse than James!"

"Calm down, Lily," said James. "It seems that normally Harry is relatively neat, but after four days of being in a bad mood, he slipped and didn't bother tidying..

**Harry started picking up books and throwing them hastily into his trunk. Tonks paused at his open wardrobe to look critically at her reflection in the mirror on the inside of the door.**

**'You know, I don't think violet's really my colour,' she said pensively, tugging at a lock of spiky hair. 'D'you think it makes me look a bit peaky?'**

"Maybe," said Peter. "You can try a different color."

**'Er -' said Harry, looking up at her over the top of _Quidditch Teams of Britain and Ireland_.**

**'Yeah, it does,' said Tonks decisively. She screwed up her eyes in a strained expression as though she was struggling to remember something. A second later, her hair had turned bubble-gum pink.**

**'How did you do that?' said Harry, gaping at her as she opened her eyes again.**

"Dora's a Metamorphmagus," said Sirius. "Or prehaps I had better call her Tonks like the book does."

**'I'm a Metamorphmagus,' she said, looking back at her reflection and turning her head so that she could see her hair from all directions. 'It means I can change my appearance at will,' she added, spotting Harry's puzzled expression in the mirror behind her. 'I was born one. I got top marks in Concealment and Disguise during Auror training without any study at all, it was great.'**

"Wow, my little cousin's an Auror. That's impressive." Sirius grinned.

**'You're an Auror?' said Harry, impressed. Being a Dark-wizard-catcher was the only career he'd ever considered after Hogwarts.**

**'Yeah,' said Tonks, looking proud. 'Kingsley is as well, he's a bit higher up than me, though. I only qualified a year ago. Nearly failed on Stealth and Tracking. I'm dead clumsy, did you hear me break that plate when we arrived downstairs?'**

"Didn't you say that Dora, er Tonks, is clumsy now, Sirius?" asked James. Sirius nodded.

**'Can you learn how to be a Metamorphmagus?' Harry asked her, straightening up, completely forgetting about packing.  
Tonks chuckled.**

"Sorry," said Remus. "You're born one. So you can't hide your scar, Harry, except with the spells and potions."

**'Bet you wouldn't mind hiding that scar sometimes, eh?'  
Her eyes found the lightning-shaped scar on Harry's forehead.**

**'No, I wouldn't mind,' Harry mumbled, turning away. He did not like people staring at his scar.**

"We can sympathize," said Peter.

**'Well, you'll have to learn the hard way, I'm afraid,' said Tonks. 'Metamorphmagi are really rare, they're born, not made. Most wizards need to use a wand, or potions, to change their appearance. But we've got to get going, Harry, we're supposed to be packing,' she added guiltily, looking around at all the mess on the floor.**

**'Oh — yeah,' said Harry, grabbing a few more books.**

**'Don't be stupid, it'll be much quicker if I - pack!' cried Tonks, waving her wand in a long, sweeping movement over the floor. Books, clothes, telescope and scales all soared into the air and flew pell-mell into the trunk. 'It's not very neat,' said Tonks, walking over to the trunk and looking down at the jumble inside. 'My mum's got this knack of getting stuff to fit itself in neatly - she even gets the socks to fold themselves - but I've never mastered how she does it - it's a kind of flick -'**

"Andie really is very tidy," said Sirius. "Even though she never needed to do any of the household spells until after she eloped with Ted. Before the family house-elves just did the cleaning."

**She flicked her wand hopefully.**

**One of Harry's socks gave a feeble sort of wiggle and flopped back on top of the mess in the trunk.**

"Well, it looks like Tonks isn't very good with household spells," commented James.

**'Ah, well,' said Tonks, slamming the trunk's lid shut, 'at least it's all in. That could do with a bit of cleaning, too.' She pointed her wand at Hedwig's cage. 'Scourgify.' A few feathers and droppings vanished. 'Well, that's a bit better - I've never quite got the hang of these householdy sort of spells. Right - got everything? Cauldron? Broom? Wow! - A Firebolt!'**

"She sounds impressed with Harry's broom," commented Lily.

"Who wouldn't be?" asked Peter.

**Her eyes widened as they fell on the broomstick in Harry's right hand. It was his pride and joy, a gift from Sirius, an international-standard broomstick.**

**'And I'm still riding a Comet Two Sixty,' said Tonks enviously. 'Ah well… wand still in your jeans? Both buttocks still on? **

There were a few chuckles at that.

**OK, let's go. Locomotor trunk.'**

**Harry's trunk rose a few inches into the air. Holding her wand like a conductor's baton, Tonks made the trunk hover across the room and out of the door ahead of them, Hedwig's cage in her left hand. Harry followed her down the stairs carrying his broomstick.**

**Back in the kitchen Moody had replaced his eye, which was spinning so fast after its cleaning it made Harry feel sick to look at it. Kingsley Shacklebolt and Sturgis Podmore were examining the microwave and Hestia Jones was laughing at a potato peeler she had come across while rummaging in the drawers. Lupin was sealing a letter addressed to the Dursleys.**

**'Excellent,' said Lupin, looking up as Tonks and Harry entered. 'We've got about a minute, I think. We should probably get out into the garden so we're ready. Harry, I've left a letter telling your aunt and uncle not to worry -'**

"They won't," said Remus darkly.

**'They won't,' said Harry.**

**'- that you're safe -'**

"They wouldn't care at all," muttered Sirius angrily.

**'That'll just depress them.'**

**'- and you'll see them next summer.'**

**'Do I have to?'**

**Lupin smiled but made no answer.**

**'Come here, boy,' said Moody gruffly, beckoning Harry towards him with his wand. 'I need to Disillusion you.'**

**'You need to what?' said Harry nervously.**

"Disillusion you," said James. "It makes you blend in with your surroundings, like that lizard who can change colors to blend-"

"It's called a chameleon," interrupted Lily. "And why can't Harry use his Invisibility Cloak?"

"Because it'll probably come off when they're flying," said Remus.

**'Disillusionment Charm,' said Moody, raising his wand. 'Lupin says you've got an Invisibility Cloak, but it won't stay on while we're flying; this'll disguise you better. Here you go -'**

**He rapped him hard on the top of the head and Harry felt a curious sensation as though Moody had just smashed an egg there; cold trickles seemed to be running down his body from the point the wand had struck.**

**'Nice one, Mad-Eye,' said Tonks appreciatively, staring at Harry's midriff.**

"Must have worked very well," said Sirius. "Though I don't know if I like the idea of my cousin staring at my godson's midriff."

**Harry looked down at his body, or rather, what had been his body, for it didn't look anything like his any more. It was not invisible; it had simply taken on the exact colour and texture of the kitchen unit behind him. He seemed to have become a human chameleon.**

"Yep," said Peter. "That's how a Disillusionment Charm works."

**'Come on,' said Moody, unlocking the back door with his wand.**

**They all stepped outside on to Uncle Vernon's beautifully kept lawn.**

**'Clear night,' grunted Moody, his magical eye scanning the heavens. 'Could've done with a bit more cloud cover. Right, you,' he barked at Harry, 'we're going to be flying in close formation. Tonks'll be right in front of you, keep close on her tail. Lupin'll be covering you from below I'm going to be behind you. The rest'll be circling us. We don't break ranks for anything, got me? If one of us is killed -'**

"Is that likely?" asked Lily.

"Not unless Death Eaters got wind of the fact that Harry was being removed from Privet Drive," replied James. "Moody is probably just being his usual paranoid self."

**'Is that likely?' Harry asked apprehensively, but Moody ignored him.**

**'- the others keep flying, don't stop, don't break ranks. If they take out all of us and you survive, Harry, the rear guard are standing by to take over; keep flying east and they'll join you.'**

**'Stop being so cheerful, Mad-Eye, he'll think we're not taking this seriously,' said Tonks, as she strapped Harry's trunk and Hedwig's cage into a harness hanging from her broom.**

"Dora, er, Tonks, is probably being sarcastic," said Sirius.

**'I'm just telling the boy the plan,' growled Moody. 'Our job's to deliver him safely to Headquarters and if we die in the attempt -'**

**'No one's going to die,' said Kingsley Shacklebolt in his deep, calming voice.**

"Thank Merlin Kingsley's there with a voice of reason," said Remus.

**'Mount your brooms, that's the first signal!' said Lupin sharply, pointing into the sky.**

**Far, far above them, a shower of bright red sparks had flared among the stars, Harry recognised them at once as wand sparks. He swung his right leg over his Firebolt, gripped its handle tightly and felt it vibrating very slightly, as though it was as keen as he was to be up in the air once more.**

**'Second signal, let's go!' said Lupin loudly as more sparks, green this time, exploded high above them.**

**Harry kicked off hard from the ground. The cool night air rushed through his hair as the neat square gardens of Privet Drive fell away, shrinking rapidly into a patchwork of dark greens and blacks, and every thought of the Ministry hearing was swept from his mind as though the rush of air had blown it out of his head. He felt as though his heart was going to explode with pleasure; he was flying again, flying away from Privet Drive as he'd been fantasising about all summer, he was going home… for a few glorious moments, all his problems seemed to recede to nothing, insignificant in the vast, starry sky.**

"Ah, flying can make anyone forget his troubles for awhile," sighed James happily.

"Unless you're scared of heights or flying," pointed out Peter.

**'Hard left, hard left, there's a Muggle looking up!' shouted Moody from behind him. Tonks swerved and Harry followed her, watching his trunk swinging wildly beneath her broom. 'We need more height… give it another quarter of a mile!'**

**Harry's eyes watered in the chill as they soared upwards; he could see nothing below now but tiny pinpricks of light that were car headlights and streetlamps. Two of those tiny lights might belong to Uncle Vernon's car… the Dursleys would be heading back to their empty house right now, full of rage about the non-existent Lawn Competition…**

They all laughed at the thought.

**and Harry laughed aloud at the thought, though his voice was drowned by the flapping robes of the others, the creaking of the harness holding his trunk and the cage, and the whoosh of the wind in their ears as they sped through the air. He had not felt this alive in a month, or this happy.**

"Oh, my poor son," said Lily. "He has such terrible summers."

**'Bearing south!' shouted Mad-Eye. 'Town ahead!'**

**They soared right to avoid passing directly over the glittering spider's web of lights below.**

**'Bear southeast and keep climbing, there's some low cloud ahead we can lose ourselves in!' called Moody.**

"Is Moody mad?" demanded Remus. "If they go through some clouds, they'll get soaked!"

**'We're not going through clouds!' shouted Tonks angrily, 'we'll get soaked, Mad-Eye!'**

"Thank Merlin Tonks spoke up to object to it," said James.

**Harry was relieved to hear her say this; his hands were growing numb on the Firebolt's handle. He wished he had thought to put on a coat; he was starting to shiver.**

"Oh, Harry, you're chilled!" exclaimed Lily. "I hope you don't catch a cold." James rolled his eyes.

**They altered their course every now and then according to Mad-Eyes instructions. Harry's eyes were screwed up against the rush of icy wind that was starting to make his ears ache; he could remember being this cold on a broom only once before, during the Quidditch match against Hufflepuff in his third year, which had taken place in a storm. The guard around him was circling continuously like giant birds of prey. Harry lost track of time. He wondered how long they had been flying, it felt like an hour at least.**

"Probably," said Peter. "I wonder where they're going. Is it as far as away as the Burrow?"

"I hope not," said James. "It took three or four hours to get there by flying car."

**'Turning southwest!' yelled Moody 'We want to avoid the motorway!'**

**Harry was now so chilled he thought longingly of the snug, dry interiors of the cars streaming along below, then, even more longingly, of travelling by Floo powder; it might be uncomfortable to spin around in fireplaces but it was at least warm in the flames… Kingsley Shacklebolt swooped around him, bald pate and earring gleaming slightly in the moonlight… now Emmeline Vance was on his right, her wand out, her head turning left and right… then she, too, swooped over him, to be replaced by Sturgis Podmore…**

**'We ought to double back for a bit, just to make sure we're not being followed!' Moody shouted.**

"They're already frozen to their brooms!" screeched Lily. "With you wanting to go off course, it'll take you until next week to arrive at your destination!"

**'ARE YOU MAD, MAD-EYE?' Tonks screamed from the front. 'We're all frozen to our brooms! If we keep going off-course we're not going to get there until next week! Besides, we're nearly there now!'**

**'Time to start the descent!' came Lupin's voice. 'Follow Tonks, Harry!'**

"Thank Merlin it's over and they're about to arrive," said James.

**Harry followed Tonks into a dive. They were heading for the largest collection of lights he had yet seen, a huge, sprawling crisscrossing mass, glittering in lines and grids, interspersed with patches of deepest black. **

"Must be a city then," said Remus. "Like London or something."

**Lower and lower they flew, until Harry could see individual headlights and streetlamps, chimneys and television aerials. He wanted to reach the ground very much, though he felt sure someone would have to unfreeze him from his broom.**

**'Here we go!' called Tonks, and a few seconds later she had landed.**

**Harry touched down right behind her and dismounted on a patch of unkempt grass in the middle of a small square. Tonks was already unbuckling Harry's trunk. Shivering, Harry looked around. The grimy fronts of the surrounding houses were not welcoming; some of them had broken windows, glimmering dully in the light from the streetlamps, paint was peeling from many of the doors and heaps of rubbish lay outside several sets of front steps.**

"What place is this?" asked Sirius. "The street's old and dirty."

**'Where are we?' Harry asked, but Lupin said quietly, 'In a minute.'**

**Moody was rummaging in his cloak, his gnarled hands clumsy with cold.**

**'Got it,' he muttered, raising what looked like a silver cigarette lighter into the air and clicking it.**

"That's the Put-Outer," said Peter. "Did Moody borrow it from Dumbledore?"

The others blinked, then remembered that Dumbledore had one and had used it in the first chapter of the first book. "Probably," said Lily.

**The nearest streetlamp went out with a pop. He clicked the unlighter again; the next lamp went out; he kept clicking until every lamp in the square was extinguished and the only remaining light came from curtained windows and the sickle moon overhead.**

**'Borrowed it from Dumbledore,' growled Moody, pocketing the Put-Outer. 'That'll take care of any Muggles looking out of the window, see? Now come on, quick.'**

"Where are they going?" asked James.

**He took Harry by the arm and led him from the patch of grass, across the road and on to the pavement; Lupin and Tonks followed, carrying Harry's trunk between them, the rest of the guard, all with their wands out, flanking them.**

**The muffled pounding of a stereo was coming from an upper window in the nearest house. A pungent smell of rotting rubbish came from the pile of bulging bin-bags just inside the broken gate.**

"Yuck!" exclaimed Lily. "This neighborhood sounds like one of the worse parts of L:ondon."

**'Here,' Moody muttered, thrusting a piece of parchment towards Harry's Disillusioned hand and holding his lit wand close to it, so as to illuminate the writing. 'Read quickly and memorise.'**

**Harry looked down at the piece of paper. The narrow handwriting was vaguely familiar. It said:  
_The Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix may be found at number twelve, Grimmauld Place, London_.**

Sirius, James, and Remus stared at the book in shock. "That's the address of the Black family home!" gasped Sirius finally.

"What!" yelped Lily, dropping the book in her hands. "The Headquarters are at your family home, Sirius?"

Sirius nodded slowly and Peter said, "So that's why the address sounded familiar. What's the Order of the Phoenix?"

Remus shrugged. "Probably something to do with the 'old crowd' Dumbledore mentioned. Must be fighting Moldywart or something."

"I guess," said James. "But I'm amazed that the Headquarters are at the Black residence. I mean, Sirius' been disowned."

"I guess something happened to Regulus so that when my parents died, I ended up inheriting the house," said Sirius. "And then I let it be used for this Order of the Phoenix." He then volunteered to read the next chapter and picked up the book.


	4. Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place

Author's Note: I was replacing my chapter one because my sister pointed out a typo, and I accidentally ended up updating as chapter four. I instantly realized my error and deleted the new chapter. That is why many of my readers got an e-mail saying I updated when I really didn't. Sorry about that. Here is the real chapter four.

**CHAPTER FOUR**

**Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place**

**"What's the Order of the ‐?" Harry began. **

**'Not here, boy! snarled Moody. Wait till we're inside!'**

**He pulled the piece of parchment out of Harry's hand and set fire to it with his wand-tip. As the message curled into flames and floated to the ground, Harry looked around at the houses again. They were standing outside number eleven; he looked to the left and saw number ten; to the right, however, was number thirteen.**

**'But where's ‐?'**

"It's going to be between the houses," said Remus. "You'll probably have to think about what you just read, since the house is likely under a Fidelius Charm."

"And there's lots of other protections, too," said Sirius. "My father made it Unplottable and everything. Only witches and wizards could see the house by the time he was done."

**'Think about what you've just memorised,' said Lupin quietly.**

**Harry thought, and no sooner had he reached the part about number twelve, Grimmauld Place, than a battered door emerged out of nowhere between numbers eleven and thirteen, followed swiftly by dirty walls and grimy windows. It was as though an extra house had inflated, pushing those on either side out of its way. Harry gaped at it. The stereo in number eleven thudded on. Apparently the Muggles inside hadn't felt anything.**

"They wouldn't," said James.

**'Come on, hurry,' growled Moody, prodding Harry in the back.**

**Harry walked up the worn stone steps, staring at the newly materialised door. Its black paint was shabby and scratched. The silver doorknocker was in the form of a twisted serpent. There was no keyhole or letterbox.**

**Lupin pulled out his wand and tapped the door once. Harry heard many loud, metallic clicks and what sounded like the clatter of a chain. The door creaked open.**

**'Get in quick, Harry,' Lupin whispered, 'but don't go far inside and don't touch anything.'**

"Whyever not?" asked Lily.

"This is Sirius' house we're talking about," said Peter. "Or rather, the Black house." Lily nodded in understanding.

**Harry stepped over the threshold into the almost total darkness of the hall. He could smell damp, dust and a sweetish, rotting smell; the place had the feeling of a derelict building. He looked over his shoulder and saw the others filing in behind him, Lupin and Tonks carrying his trunk and Hedwig's cage. Moody was standing on the top step releasing the balls of light the Put-Outer had stolen from the streetlamps; they flew back to their bulbs and the square glowed momentarily with orange light before Moody limped inside and closed the front door, so that the darkness in the hall became complete.**

"I can't believe that this Order of the Phoenix is using my old home for Headquarters," said Sirius, shaking his head. "I thought after I ran away the past summer, I'd never set foot inside it again."

**'Here ‐'**

**He rapped Harry hard over the head with his wand; Harry felt as though something hot was trickling down his back this time and knew that the Disillusionment Charm must have lifed.**

**'Now stay still, everyone, while I give us a bit of light in here,' Moody whispered.**

**The others' hushed voices were giving Harry an odd feeling of foreboding; it was as though they had just entered the house of a dying person. He heard a soft hissing noise and then old-fashioned gas lamps sputtered into life all along the walls, casting a flickering insubstantial light over the peeling wallpaper and threadbare carpet of a long, gloomy hallway, where a cobwebby chandelier glimmered overhead and age-blackened portraits hung crooked on the walls. Harry heard something scuttling behind the skirting board. Both the chandelier and the candelabra on a rickety table nearby were shaped like serpents.**

"Is your old house really like that?" asked Lily, shuddering. Sirius nodded.

"I've seen it before," said James. "When the Blacks had social functions and all the wealthy and influential pureblood families were invitied. I first met Sirius at one of those functions and we got to be friends."

**There were hurried footsteps and Ron's mother, Mrs. Weasley, emerged from a door at the far end of the hall. She was beaming in welcome as she hurried towards them, though Harry noticed that she was rather thinner and paler than she had been last time he had seen her.**

"Apparently Voldemort's return and having to combat it has affected her greatly," remarked Remus.

**'Oh, Harry, it's lovely to see you!' she whispered, pulling him into a rib-cracking hug before holding him at arm's length and examining him critically. 'You're looking peaky; you need feeding up, but you'll have to wait a bit for dinner, I'm afraid.' ****She turned to the gang of wizards behind him and whispered urgently, "He's just arrived, the meeting's started."**

"Who's just arrived?" asked Peter curiously. The others shrugged.

**The wizards behind Harry all made noises of interest and excitement and began filing past him towards the door through which Mrs. Weasley had just come. Harry made to follow Lupin, but Mrs. Weasley held him back.**

**'No, Harry, the meetings only for members of the Order. Ron and Hermione are upstairs, you can wait with them until the meetings over, then we'll have dinner. And keep your voice down in the hall,' she added in an urgent whisper.**

"Why?" asked Lily, looking over at Sirius. "Is there something that Harry could wake up if he makes too much noise?"

Sirius shrugged. "I really don't know. There's nothing in the front hall now that could be set off now. Unless Molly's afraid of waking up one of the portraits. But they don't usually rant and rave if they're disturbed."

"Just how terrible is your house, Sirius?" asked Peter.

"You'll see," said Sirius darkly.

**'Why?'**

**'I don't want anything to wake up.'**

**'What d'you ‐?'**

**'I'll explain later, I've got to hurry, I'm supposed to be at the meeting ‐ I'll just show you where you're sleeping.'**

**Pressing her finger to her lips, she led him on tiptoe past a pair of long, moth-eaten curtains, behind which Harry supposed there must be another door,**

"I don't think so," said James. "Sirius, have any curtains been added to the hall since I was last there?" Sirius shook his head.

**and after skirting a large umbrella stand that looked as though it had been made from a severed troll's leg they started up the dark staircase, passing a row of shrunken heads mounted on plaques on the wall. A closer look showed Harry that the heads belonged to house-elves. All of them had the same rather snout-like nose.**

"House elves?" asked Remus in shock. "You never mentioned that before! All you've ever told Peter and me is that your house is depressing and the decorated the way you'd expect a Dark wizarding house would be decorated."

Sirius grimaced. "I don't like talking about the family home, Remus. The house-elf heads was a tradition started by dear old Aunt Elladora. When a house-elf got too old to carry tea trays, he or she got beheaded and the heads were stuck on the wall."

**Harry's bewilderment deepened with every step he took. What on earth were they doing in a house that looked as though it belonged to the darkest of wizards?**

"Apparently Sirius inherited the family home and he let it be used as Headquarters for this Order of the Phoenix," said James.

**'Mrs. Weasley, why ‐?'**

**'Ron and Hermione will explain everything, dear, I've really got to dash,' Mrs. Weasley whispered distractedly. 'There ‐' they had reached the second landing, '-you're the door on the right. I'll call you when it's over.' ****And she hurried off downstairs again.**

**Harry crossed the dingy landing, turned the bedroom doorknob, which was shaped like a serpent's head, and opened the door.**

**He caught a brief glimpse of a gloomy high-ceilinged, twin-bedded room; then there was a loud twittering noise, followed by an even louder shriek, and his vision was completely obscured by a large quantity of very bushy hair. **

"Ah, Hermione must have spotted him and is now giving Harry a big hug," said Remus, sounding slightly amused.

**Hermione had thrown herself on to him in a hug that nearly knocked him flat, while Ron's tiny owl, Pigwidgeon, zoomed excitedly round and round their heads.**

**'HARRY! Ron, he's here, Harry's here! We didn't hear you arrive! Oh, how are you? Are you all right? Have you been furious with us? I bet you have, I know our letters were useless - but we couldn't tell you anything, Dumbledore made us swear we wouldn't, oh, we've got so much to tell you, and you've got things to tell us - the Dementors! When we heard - and that Ministry hearing - it's just outrageous, I've looked it all up, they can't expel you, they just can't, there's provision in the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery for the use of magic in life-threatening situations‐'**

"Let Harry breathe," said Lily, also sounding a bit amused. "Well, Hermione's concerned for Harry and seems to understand what he's going through."

**'Let him breathe, Hermione,' said Ron, grinning as he closed the door behind Harry. He seemed to have grown several more inches during their month apart, making him taller and more gangly looking than ever, though the long nose, bright red hair and freckles were the same.**

**Still beaming, Hermione let go of Harry, but before she could say another word there was a soft whooshing sound and something white soared from the top of a dark wardrobe and landed gently on Harry's shoulder.**

"And there's Hedwig," said Peter.

**'Hedwig!'**

**The snowy owl clicked her beak and nibbled his ear affectionately as Harry stroked her feathers.**

**'She's been in a right state,' said Ron. 'Pecked us half to death when she brought your last letters, look at this ‐'  
He showed Harry the index finger on his right hand, which sported a half-healed but clearly deep cut.**

Lily frowned. "You shouldn't have told Hedwig to peck your friends, even if you did want answers, Harry."

Peter nodded. "Yeah. Poor Ron."

**'Oh, yeah,' Harry said. 'Sorry about that, but I wanted answers, you know ‐'**

**'We wanted to give them to you, mate,' said Ron. 'Hermione was going spare, she kept saying you'd do something stupid if you were stuck all on your own without news, but Dumbledore made us ‐'**

**'- swear not to tell me,' said Harry. 'Yeah, Hermione's already said.'**

**The warm glow that had flared inside him at the sight of his two best friends was extinguished as something icy flooded the pitof his stomach. All of a sudden - after yearning to see them for a solid month — he felt he would rather Ron and Hermione left him alone.**

"What!" yelped Sirius, looking shocked. "Ron and Hermione are your best friends, Harry! How can you not want to see them anymore!"

**There was a strained silence in which Harry stroked Hedwig automatically, not looking at either of the others.**

**'He seemed to think it was best,' said Hermione rather breathlessly. 'Dumbledore, I mean.'**

**'Right,' said Harry. He noticed that her hands, too, bore the marks of Hedwig's beak and found that he was not at all sorry.**

"Excuse me?" asked James. "It's not their fault they couldn't write any proper information, Harry. Dumbledore made them promise not to, so don't be mad at them."

**'I think he thought you were safest with the Muggles ‐' Ron began.**

**'Yeah?' said Harry, raising his eyebrows. 'Have either of you been attacked by Dementors this summer?'**

**'Well, no ‐ but that's why he's had people from the Order of the Phoenix tailing you all the time ‐'**

**Harry felt a great jolt in his guts as though he had just missed a step going downstairs. So everyone had known he was being followed, except him.**

"I can understand that Harry might feel a bit angry about that," said Remus.

**'Didn't work that well, though, did it?' said Harry, doing his utmost to keep his voice even. 'Had to look after myself after all, didn't I?'**

"Well, Mundungus was being an idiot when he decided that buying stolen cauldrons was more important than Harry's safety," said James. "Still, Harry shouldn't get too angry over something he couldn't control."

**'He was so angry,' said Hermione, in an almost awestruck voice. 'Dumbledore. We saw him. When he found out Mundungus had left before his shift had ended. He was scary.'**

**'Well, I'm glad he left,' Harry said coldly. 'If he hadn't, I wouldn't have done magic and Dumbledore would probably have left me at Privet Drive all summer.'**

"Dumbledore wouldn't have done that!" exclaimed Lily. "He would have had you taken away eventually."

**'Aren't you… aren't you worried about the Ministry of Magic hearing?' said Hermione quietly.**

**'No,' Harry lied defiantly. He walked away from them, looking around, with Hedwig nestled contentedly on his shoulder, but this room was not likely to raise his spirits. It was dank and dark. A blank stretch of canvas in an ornate picture frame was all that relieved the bareness of the peeling walls, and as Harry passed it he thought he heard someone, who was lurking out of sight, snigger.**

"I know that picture," said Sirius. "I think it's the portrait of Phineas Nigellus Black. He was a former Headmaster of Hogwarts, and he divides his time between his portrait frame at Hogwarts and the one at the Black home."

**'So why's Dumbledore been so keen to keep me in the dark?' Harry asked, still trying hard to keep his voice casual. 'Did you‐er‐bother to ask him at all?'**

**He glanced up just in time to see them exchanging a look that told him he was behaving just as they had feared he would. It did nothing to improve his temper.**

**'We told Dumbledore we wanted to tell you what was going on,' said Ron. 'We did, mate. But he's really busy now, we've only seen him twice since we came here and he didn't have much time, he just made us swear not to tell you important stuff when we wrote, he said the owls might be intercepted.'**

"I thought so," said Remus. "Ron, Hermione, and Sirius couldn't write anything important in case they opwls were intercepted."

**'He could still've kept me informed if he'd wanted to,' Harry said shortly. 'You're not telling me he doesn't know ways to send messages without owls.'**

"Harry has a point," said Peter. "But maybe Dumbledore didn't want Harry to know anything just yet."

**Hermione glanced at Ron and then said, 'I thought that, too. But he didn't want you to know anything.'**

**'Maybe he thinks I can't be trusted,' said Harry, watching their expressions. **

"Dumbledore would never think that!" exclaimed James in shock.

"Of course not," said Peter.

**'Don't be thick,' said Ron, looking highly disconcerted.**

**'Or that I can't take care of myself.'**

"Dumbledore doesn't think that!' exclaimed Lily. "He probably didn't tell you anything important to keep you from doing something rash!"

"Yeah," said Sirius. "What Lily said."

**'Of course he doesn't think that!' said Hermione anxiously.**

**'So how come I have to stay at the Dursleys' while you two get to join in everything that's going on here?' said Harry, the words tumbling over one another in a rush, his voice growing louder with every word. 'How come you two are allowed to know everything that's going on?'**

"I don't think Ron and Hermione are allowed to know everything that's going on," said Remus. "Mrs. Weasley said the meeting was just for Order members, and they wouldn't be part of this Order."

**'We're not!' Ron interrupted. 'Mum won't let us near the meetings, she says we're too young ‐'**

**But before he knew it, Harry was shouting.**

**'SO YOU HAVEN'T BEEN IN THE MEETINGS, BIG DEAL! YOU'VE STILL BEEN HERE, HAVEN'T YOU? YOU'VE STILL BEEN TOGETHER! ME, I'VE BEEN STUCK AT THE DURSLEYS' FOR A MONTH! AND I'VE HANDLED MORE THAN YOU TWO'VE EVER MANAGED AND DUMBLEDORE KNOWS IT ‐WHO SAVED THE PHILOSOPHER'S STONE? WHO GOT RID OF RIDDLE? WHO SAVED BOTH YOUR SKINS FROM THE DEMENTORS?'**

"Harry James Potter!" scolded Lily. "Can't you learn to control you temper instead of shouting in capital letters? It's not Ron and Hermione's fault that they can't tell you anything. Don't take out your anger on them! If you have a problem with not being informed on things, then take the issue up with Dumbledore."

**Every bitter and resentful thought Harry had had in the past month was pouring out of him: his frustration at the lack of news, the hurt that they had all been together without him, his fury at being followed and not told about it‐all the feelings he was half-ashamed of finally burst their boundaries. Hedwig took fright at the noise and soared off to the top of the wardrobe again; Pigwidgeon twittered in alarm and zoomed even taster around their heads.**

"Harry, could you please take your frustrations out in some other way than just yelling at your friends?" asked James, alarmed. "They're not responsible for your not knowing anything important, Dumbledore is. Take your problem to him."

**'WHO HAD TO GET PAST DRAGONS AND SPHINXES AND EVERY OTHER FOUL THING LAST YEAR? WHO SAW HIM COME BACK? WHO HAD TO ESCAPE FROM HIM? ME!'**

**Ron was standing there with his mouth half-open, clearly stunned and at a loss for anything to say, whilst Hermione looked on the verge of tears.**

The Marauders all looked aghast at the book, for none of them had ever yelled at each other like that. Lily shook her head at Harry's behavior.

**'BUT WHY SHOULD I KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON? WHY SHOULD ANYONE BOTHER TO TELL ME WHAT'S BEEN HAPPENING?'**

"Dumbledore probably has a very good reason to not let you know anything right now, Harry!" said Remus.

**'Harry, we wanted to tell you, we really did ‐' Hermione began.**

**'CANT'VE WANTED TO THAT MUCH, CAN YOU, OR YOU'D HAVE SENT ME AN OWL, BUT DUMBLEDORE MADE YOU SWEAR ‐'**

**'Well, he did-'**

**'FOUR WEEKS I'VE BEEN STUCK IN PRIVET DRIVE, NICKING PAPERS OUT OF BINS TO TRY AND FIND OUT WHAT'S BEEN GOING ON ‐'**

Peter looked frightened. "I'm glad none of you guys are like that."

**'We wanted to ‐'**

**'I SUPPOSE YOU'VE BEEN HAVING A REAL LAUGH, HAVEN'T YOU, ALL HOLED UP HERE TOGETHER ‐'**

**'No, honest ‐'**

**'Harry we're really sorry!' said Hermione desperately, her eyes now sparkling with tears. 'You're absolutely right, Harry ‐ I'd be furious if it was me!'**

"Calm down, Harry!" exclaimed Sirius. "Ron and Hermione know what you're going through. Stop taking out your anger on them!"

**Harry glared at her, still breathing deeply, then turned away from them again, pacing up and down. Hedwig hooted glumly from the top of the wardrobe. There was a long pause, broken only by the mournful creak of the floorboards below Harry's feet.**

**'What is this place, anyway?' he shot at Ron and Hermione.**

"The Black family home and currently Headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix," said James.

**'Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix,' said Ron at once.**

**'Is anyone going to bother telling me what the Order of the Phoenix ‐?'**

**'It's a secret society,' said Hermione quickly. 'Dumbledore's in charge, he founded it. It's the people who fought against You-Know-Who last time.'**

"I wonder if we ever become part of it when we graduate," said Lily.

"Well, seeing as Sirius and Remus are part of in Harry's time, I assume we did join it after we graduated," replied Remus.

**'Who's in it?' said Harry, coming to a halt with his hands in his pockets.**

**'Quite a few people ‐'**

**'We've met about twenty of them,' said Ron, 'but we think there are more.'**

"There probably are," said Peter.

**Harry glared at them.**

**'Well?' he demanded, looking from one to the other.**

**'Er,' said Ron. 'Well what?'**

**'Voldemort!' said Harry furiously, and both Ron and Hermione winced. 'What's happening? What's he up to? Where is he? What are we doing to stop him?'**

"Well, Voldemort doesn't seem to be doing anything at the moment, or it'd be big news," said Sirius.

**'We've told you, the Order don't let us in on their meetings,' said Hermione nervously. 'So we don't know the details ‐ but we've got a general idea,' she added hastily, seeing the look on Harry's face.**

**'Fred and George have invented Extendable Ears, see,' said Ron. 'They're really useful.'**

"They invented something like that?" asked James, impressed. "Wow. That means they can eavesdrop on the meetings."

**'Extendable ‐?'**

**'Ears, yeah. Only we've had to stop using them lately because Mum found out and went berserk. **

"It's to be expected," said Sirius, sounding glum. "But how did Molly find out in the first place?"

**Fred and George had to hide them all to stop Mum binning them. But we got a good bit of use out of them before Mum realised what was going on. We know some of the Order are following known Death Eaters, keeping tabs on them, you know ‐'**

"So they're tailing Lucius Malfoy and the rest that showed up at the Graveyeard?" asked Peter. The others nodded.

**'Some of them are working on recruiting more people to the Order ‐' said Hermione.**

**'And some of them are standing guard over something,' said Ron. 'They're always talking about guard duty.'**

"And that would be Harry they're guarding," said Lily.

**'Couldn't have been me, could it?' said Harry sarcastically.**

**'Oh, yeah,' said Ron, with a look of dawning comprehension.**

"And now you realize," said Remus sarcastically.

**Harry snorted. He walked around the room again, looking anywhere but at Ron and Hermione. 'So, what have you two been doing, if you're not allowed in meetings?' he demanded. 'You said you'd been busy.'**

**'We have,' said Hermione quickly. 'We've been decontaminating this house, it's been empty for ages and stuff's been breeding in here. **

"And I doubt Kreacher made any effort in cleaning the house," muttered Sirius.

**We've managed to clean out the kitchen, most of the bedrooms and I think we're doing the drawing room tomo‐'**

**With two loud cracks, Fred and George, Ron's elder twin brothers, had materialised out of thin air in the middle of the room. Pigwidgeon twittered more wildly than ever and zoomed off to join Hedwig on top of the wardrobe.**

"It looks like the twins passed their Apparation tests," remarked James, grinning.

**'Stop doing that!' Hermione said weakly to the twins, who were as vividly red-haired as Ron, though stockier and slightly shorter.**

**'Hello, Harry,' said George, beaming at him. 'We thought we heard your dulcet tones.'**

"I think people a hundred miles away heard Harry shouting," said Remus, shaking his head.

**'You don't want to bottle up your anger like that, Harry, let it all out,' said Fred, also beaming. 'There might be a couple of people fifty miles away who didn't hear you.'**

**'You two passed your Apparation tests, then?' asked Harry grumpily.**

**'With distinction,' said Fred, who was holding what looked like a piece of very long, flesh-coloured string.**

"Must be an Extendable Ear," said Peter. "They must be trying to eavesdrop, but Harry's shouting would keep them from hearing anything else."

**'It would have taken you about thirty seconds longer to walk down the stairs,' said Ron.**

**'Time is Galleons, little brother,' said Fred. 'Anyway, Harry, you're interfering with reception. Extendable Ears,' he added in response to Harry's raised eyebrows, and held up the string which Harry now saw was trailing out on to the landing. 'We're trying to hear what's going on downstairs.'**

"They'd better be careful," said Lily. "They certainly don't want Molly catching them with the Extendable Ears."

**'You want to be careful,' said Ron, staring at the Ear, 'if Mum sees one of them again…'**

**'It's worth the risk, that's a major meeting they're having,' said Fred.**

**The door opened and a long mane of red hair appeared.**

"Looks like Ginny's appeared on the scene," said Remus.

**'Oh, hello, Harry!' said Ron's younger sister, Ginny, brightly. 'I thought I heard your voice.' **

"Anybody within a fifty-mile radius would have heard," muttered James.

**Turning to Fred and George, she said, 'It's no-go with the Extendable Ears, she's gone and put an Imperturbable Charm on the kitchen door.'**

**'How d'you know?' said George, looking crestfallen.**

**'Tonks told me how to find out,' said Ginny. **

"That's nice of Dora, er, Tonks," said Sirius. "She sounds cool. Wait, I can't believe I'm saying this about my four-year old cousin."

**'You just chuck stuff at the door and if it can't make contact the door's been Imperturbed. I've been flicking Dungbombs at it from the top of the stairs and they just soar away from it, so there's no way the Extendable Ears will be able to get under the gap.'**

**Fred heaved a deep sigh.**

**'Shame. I really fancied finding out what old Snape's been up to.'**

"Snape's there?" asked Peter, frowning. "What's he doing here?"

"Attending an Order meeting," replied Lily. "Why else? Dumbledore trusts him, and he's probably back to spying on Voldemort for the Order."

**'Snape!' said Harry quickly. 'Is he here?'**

**'Yeah,' said George, carefully closing the door and sitting down on one of the beds; Fred and Ginny followed. 'Giving a report. Top secret.'**

**'Git,' said Fred idly.**

**'He's on our side now,' said Hermione reprovingly.**

"That doesn't mean Snivelly's still not a git," said Sirius.

**Ron snorted. 'Doesn't stop him being a git. The way he looks at us when he sees us.'**

**'Bill doesn't like him, either,' said Ginny, as though that settled the matter.**

"Well, who likes Snape?" asked James. "Besides Dumbledore and Slughorn?"

"Slughorn only likes Snape because he's good at Potions and has the potential to become great," Remus pointed out. "And because he's related to some rich pureblood family."

**Harry was not sure his anger had abated yet; but his thirst for information was now overcoming his urge to keep shouting. He sank on to the bed opposite the others.**

**'Is Bill here?' he asked. 'I thought he was working in Egypt?'**

"Yeah, he was working in Egypt!" exclaimed Peter. "What's he doing back in Britain?"

**'He applied for a desk job so he could come home and work for the Order,' said Fred. 'He says he misses the tombs, but,' he smirked, 'there are compensations.'**

**'What d'you mean?'**

**'Remember old Fleur Delacour?' said George. "She's got a job at Gringotts to 'eemprove 'er Eeenglish ‐'"**

"Oh that would explain it," said Lily, giggling. "Bill's probably been giving Fleur many private 'lessons'."

**'And Bill's been giving her a lot of private lessons,' sniggered Fred.**

**'Charlie's in the Order, too,' said George, 'but he's still in Romania. Dumbledore wants as many foreign wizards brought in as possible, so Charlie's trying to make contacts on his days off.'**

"Can't Percy do it?" asked James. "He's working in the Department of International Magical Cooperation the last we heard."

**'Couldn't Percy do that?' Harry asked. The last he had heard, the third Weasley brother was working in the Department of International Magical Cooperation at the Ministry of Magic.**

**At Harry's words, all the Weasleys and Hermione exchanged darkly significant looks.**

"Is something going on with Percy?" asked Peter, frowning.

**'Whatever you do, don't mention Percy in front of Mum and Dad,' Ron told Harry in a tense voice.**

**'Why not?'**

**'Because every time Percy's name's mentioned, Dad breaks whatever he's holding and Mum starts crying,' Fred said.**

"Oh no!' gasped Lily. "It can't be what I think it is!"

**'It's been awful,' said Ginny sadly.**

**'I think we're well shot of him,' said George, with an uncharacteristically ugly look on his face.**

"Looks like Percy pulled a Crouch," said Sirius, shaking his head. "His career was more important than his family. With the ambition Percy has, I'm surprised he didn't end up in Slytherin."

"He probably wasn't cunning or evil enough to get sorted there," said Remus. "Or he asked the Sorting Hat to not place him there."

**'What's happened?' Harry said.**

**'Percy and Dad had a row,' said Fred. 'I've never seen Dad row with anyone like that. It's normally Mum who shouts.'**

**'It was the first week back after term ended,' said Ron. 'We were about to come and join the Order. Percy came home and told us he'd been promoted.'**

"You're kidding!" gasped Lily. "How can Percy be promoted after the oversight he made regarding Crouch?"

**'You're kidding?' said Harry.**

**Though he knew perfectly well that Percy was highly ambitious, Harry's impression was that Percy had not made a great success of his first job at the Ministry of Magic. Percy had committed the fairly large oversight of failing to notice that his boss was being controlled by Lord Voldemort (not that the Ministry had believed it ‐ they all thought Mr. Crouch had gone mad).**

**'Yeah, we were all surprised,' said George, 'because Percy got into a load of trouble about Crouch, there was an inquiry and everything. They said Percy ought to have realised Crouch was off his rocker and informed a superior. But you know Percy, Crouch left him in charge, he wasn't going to complain.'**

"So why did Percy get promoted then?" asked Sirius.

**'So how come they promoted him?'**

**'That's exactly what we wondered,' said Ron, who seemed very keen to keep normal conversation going now that Harry had stopped yelling. 'He came home really pleased with himself - even more pleased than usual, if you can imagine that - and told Dad he'd been offered a position in Fudge's own office. A really good one for someone only a year out of Hogwarts: Junior Assistant to the Minister. **

"How in Merlin's name did Percy get a promotion like that?" asked Peter.

"Who knows?" asked Remus, shrugging.

**He expected Dad to be all impressed, I think.'**

**'Only Dad wasn't,' said Fred grimly.**

**'Why not?' said Harry.**

**'Well, apparently Fudge has been storming round the Ministry checking that nobody's having any contact with Dumbledore,' said George.**

**'Dumbledore's name is mud with the Ministry these days, see,' said Fred. 'They all think he's just making trouble saying You-Know-Who's back.'**

"Dumbledore's not making trouble!" James burst out. "He's telling the truth! Harry saw it happen! He could even show you the memory in a Pensieve if you don't believe it!"

**'Dad says Fudge has made it clear that anyone who's in league with Dumbledore can clear out their desks,' said George. ****'Trouble is, Fudge suspects Dad, he knows he's friendly with Dumbledore, and he's always thought Dad's a bit of a weirdo because of his Muggle obsession.'**

"But what does that have to do with Percy?" asked Peter, looking confused.

**'But what's that got to do with Percy?' asked Harry, confused.**

**'I'm coming to that. Dad reckons Fudge only wants Percy in his office because he wants to use him to spy on the family ‐ and Dumbledore.'**

"Oh dear," said Lily. "I don't think Percy was too pleased to hear that."

**Harry let out a low whistle.**

**'Bet Percy loved that.'**

**Ron laughed in a hollow sort of way.**

**'He went completely berserk. He said - well, he said loads of terrible stuff. He said he's been having to struggle against Dad's lousy reputation ever since he joined the Ministry and that Dad's got no ambition and that's why we've always been‐you know‐not had a lot of money, I mean ‐'**

"He _what_?" demanded Sirius. "How can Percy say stuff like that? His family's great, unlike mine!"

**'What?' said Harry in disbelief, as Ginny made a noise like an angry cat.**

**'I know,' said Ron in a low voice. 'And it got worse. He said Dad was an idiot to run around with Dumbledore, that Dumbledore was heading for big trouble and Dad was going to go down with him, and that he ‐ Percy ‐ knew where his loyalty lay and it was with the Ministry. And if Mum and Dad were going to become traitors to the Ministry he was going to make sure everyone knew he didn't belong to our family any more. And he packed his bags the same night and left. He's living here in London now.'**

"Your family's more important than the bloody Ministry!" snapped Remus. "How did Percy end up like this?" Sirius angrily added Percy's name to his miscellaneous list.

**Harry swore under his breath. He had always liked Percy least of Ron's brothers, but he had never imagined he would say such things to Mr. Weasley.**

"We've never imagined such a thing, either," said James, shaking his head.

**'Mum's been in a right state,' said Ron dully. 'You know‐crying and stuff. She came up to London to try and talk to Percy but he slammed the door in her face. I dunno what he does if he meets Dad at work‐ignores him, I s'pose.'**

**'But Percy must know Voldemort's back,' said Harry slowly. 'He's not stupid, he must know your mum and dad wouldn't risk everything without proof.'**

"Prehaps, but he's more worried about advancing his career at the moment," said Sirius sourly.

**'Yeah, well, your name got dragged into the row,' said Ron, shooting Harry a furtive look. 'Percy said the only evidence was your word and… I dunno… he didn't think it was good enough.'**

"WHAT!" yelled James. "He doesn't think my son's word is good enough!"

**'Percy takes the Daily Prophet seriously,' said Hermione tartly, and the others all nodded.**

"What is Hermione talking about?" asked Peter, confused.

**'What are you talking about?' Harry asked, looking around at them all. They were all regarding him warily.**

**'Haven't ‐ haven't you been getting the Daily Prophet?' Hermione asked nervously.**

"Yes, Harry's getting it," said Lily. "But he only looks at the front page."

**'Yeah, I have!' said Harry.**

**'Have you ‐ er ‐ been reading it thoroughly?' Hermione asked, still more anxiously.**

**'Not cover to cover,' said Harry defensively. 'If they were going to report anything about Voldemort it would be headline news, wouldn't it?'**

"Well, yes," said Peter. "It would be headline news."

**The others flinched at the sound of the name. Hermione hurried on, 'Well, you'd need to read it cover to cover to pick it up, but they ‐ um ‐ they mention you a couple of times a week.'**

**'But I'd have seen-'**

"Not if all you've been reading is the front page, Harry," said Remus.

**'Not if you've only been reading the front page, you wouldn't,' said Hermione, shaking her head. 'I'm not talking about big articles. They just slip you in, like you're a standing joke.'**

"'A standing joke'?" repeated Peter. "But Harry's isn't one! He's telling the truth!"

**'What d'you ‐?'**

**'It's quite nasty, actually,' said Hermione in a voice of forced calm. 'They're just building on Rita's stuff.'**

"But Rita's not writing any more articles for the _Daily Prophet_," said Lily. "Not unless she wants Hermione to reveal that she's an unregistered Animagus."

**'But she's not writing for them any more, is she?'**

**'Oh, no, she's kept her promise ‐ not that she's got any choice,' Hermione added with satisfaction. 'But she laid the foundation for what they're trying to do now.'**

"And what that be?" asked James impatiently. "That my son is some lying, attention-seeking prat?"

**'Which is what?' said Harry impatiently.**

**'OK, you know she wrote that you were collapsing all over the place and saying your scar was hurting and all that?'**

**'Yeah,' said Harry, who was not likely to forget Rita Skeeters stories about him in a hurry.**

"We wouldn't either," said Peter.

**"Well, they're writing about you as though you're this deluded, attention-seeking person who thinks he's a great tragic hero or something," said Hermione, very fast, as though it would be less unpleasant for Harry to hear these facts quickly. "They keep slipping in snide comments about you. If some far-fetched story appears, they say something like, 'A tale worthy of Harry Potter', and if anyone has a funny accident or anything it's, 'Let's hope he hasn't got a scar on his forehead or we'll be asked to worship him next' ‐"**

"Harry doesn't want anyone worshipping him!" said Remus hotly. "And he's not lying! Voldemort really is back!"

**'I don't want anyone to worship ‐' Harry began hotly.**

**'I know you don't,' said Hermione quickly, looking frightened. 'I know, Harry. But you see what they're doing? They want to turn you into someone nobody will believe. Fudge is behind it, I'll bet anything. They want wizards on the street to think you're just some stupid boy who's a bit of a joke, who tells ridiculous tall stories because he loves being famous and wants to keep it going.'**

"How dare they!' raged Lily. "Harry's not lying in order to get attention! He's telling the truth!" Sirius added to his miscellaneous list and he and James began cursing Fudge and the Ministry under their breath.

**'I didn't ask ‐ I didn't want ‐ Voldemort killed my parents!' Harry spluttered. 'I got famous because he murdered my family but couldn't kill me! Who wants to be famous for that? Don't they think I'd rather it'd never ‐'**

**'We know, Harry,' said Ginny earnestly.**

**'And of course, they didn't report a word about the Dementors attacking you,' said Hermione. 'Someone's told them to keep that quiet. That should've been a really big story, out-of-control Dementors. They haven't even reported that you broke the International Statute of Secrecy. We thought they would, it would tie in so well with this image of you as some stupid show-off. We think they're biding their time until you're expelled, then they're really going to go to town - I mean, if you're expelled, obviously,' she went on hastily. 'You really shouldn't be, not if they abide by their own laws, there's no case against you.'**

"Well, of course," said Remus. "Though with the way the Ministry's behaving, they might not abide by their laws. They were going to expel Harry and snap his wand until Dumbledore sorted things out."

**They were back on the hearing and Harry did not want to think about that. He cast around for another change of subject, but was saved the necessity of finding one by the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs.**

**'Uh oh.'**

**Fred gave the Extendable Ear a hearty tug; there was another loud crack and he and George vanished. Seconds later, Mrs Weasley appeared in the bedroom doorway.**

**'The meeting's over, you can come down and have dinner now. Everyone's dying to see you, Harry. And who's left all those Dungbombs outside the kitchen door?'**

**'Crookshanks,' said Ginny unblushingly. 'He loves playing with them.'**

**'Oh,' said Mrs Weasley, 'I thought it might have been Kreacher, he keeps doing odd things like that. **

"Yeah, he would," growled Sirius. "That house elf is terrible."

**Now don't forget to keep your voices down in the hall. Ginny, your hands are filthy, what have you been doing? Go and wash them before dinner, please.'**

**Ginny grimaced at the others and followed her mother out of the room, leaving Harry alone with Ron and Hermione. Both of them were watching him apprehensively, as though they feared he would start shouting again now that everyone else had gone. The sight of them looking so nervous made him feel slightly ashamed.**

"You should be even more ashamed of yourself, Harry," scolded Lily.

**'Look…' he muttered, but Ron shook his head, and Hermione said quietly, 'We knew you'd be angry, Harry, we really don't blame you, but you've got to understand, we did try to persuade Dumbledore ‐'**

**'Yeah, I know,' said Harry shortly.**

**He cast around for a topic that didn't involve his headmaster, because the very thought of Dumbledore made Harry's insides burn with anger again.**

"Hey, Dumbledore has his reasons for doing things!" protested Peter. "Talk with him before you get mad at him!"

**'Who's Kreacher?' he asked.**

"The Black family house elf," snapped Sirius. "A complete nutter and believes all the rubbish my family spouts. He probably calls me a blood-traitor and everything."

**'The house-elf who lives here,' said Ron. 'Nutter. Never met one like him.'**

"He is one," said James. "He was polite enough the few times I ran into him, but I could tell he wasn't like other house-elves."

**Hermione frowned at Ron.**

**'He's not a nutter, Ron.'**

**'His life's ambition is to have his head cut off and stuck up on a plaque just like his mother,' said Ron irritably. 'Is that normal, Hermione?'**

Lily looked shocked. "That is most definitely not normal."

**'Well ‐ well, if he is a bit strange, it's not his fault.'**

**Ron rolled his eyes at Harry.**

**'Hermione still hasn't given up on SPEW ‐'**

"We can see that," said Peter, shaking his head.

**'It's not SPEW!' said Hermione heatedly. 'It's the Society for the Promotion of Elfish Welfare. And it's not just me, Dumbledore says we should be kind to Kreacher too.'**

**'Yeah, yeah,' said Ron. 'C'mon, I'm starving.'**

**He led the way out of the door and on to the landing, but before they could descend the stairs‐****'Hold it!' Ron breathed, flinging out an arm to stop Harry and Hermione walking any further. 'They're still in the hall, we might be able to hear something.'**

"Yeah, you might," said James.

**The three of them looked cautiously over the banisters. The gloomy hallway below was packed with witches and wizards, including all of Harry's guard. They were whispering excitedly together. In the very centre of the group Harry saw the dark, greasy-haired head and prominent nose of his least favourite teacher at Hogwarts, Professor Snape. Harry leant further over the banisters. He was very interested in what Snape was doing for the Order of the Phoenix…**

"We're interested too," said Remus.

**A thin piece of flesh-coloured string descended in front of Harrys eyes. Looking up, he saw Fred and George on the landing above, cautiously lowering the Extendable Ear towards the dark knot of people below. A moment later, however, they all began to move towards the front door and out of sight.**

"Darn it," muttered Sirius.

**'Dammit,' Harry heard Fred whisper, as he hoisted the Extendable Ear back up again.**

**They heard the front door open, then close.**

**'Snape never eats here,' Ron told Harry quietly. **

"Thank Merlin," said James. "The sight of him would curdle my food and I'd lose my appetite."

**'Thank God. C'mon.'**

**'And don't forget to keep your voice down in the hall, Harry,' Hermione whispered.**

**As they passed the row of house-elf heads on the wall, they saw Lupin, Mrs. Weasley and Tonks at the front door, magically sealing its many locks and bolts behind those who had just left.**

**'We're eating down in the kitchen,' Mrs. Weasley whispered, meeting them at the bottom of the stairs. 'Harry, dear, if you'll just tiptoe across the hall, it's through this door here ‐'**

**CRASH.**

"Looks like Tonks crashed into something," said Peter.

**'Tonks!' cried Mrs. Weasley in exasperation, turning to look behind her.**

**"I'm sorry!"wailed Tonks, who was lying flat on the floor. "It's that stupid umbrella stand, ****that's the second time I've tripped over-"**

"Then get rid of that umbrella stand if Tonks is going to trip over it!" exclaimed Lily. "Besides, who wants to keep something around that looks like a troll's leg?"

**But the rest of her words were drowned by a horrible, ear-splitting, blood-curdling screech.**

"Sounds like my mother," said Sirius, wincing. "She can scream like a banshee."

**The moth-eaten velvet curtains Harry had passed earlier had flown apart, but there was no door behind them. For a split second, Harry thought he was looking through a window, a window behind which an old woman in a black cap was screaming and screaming as though she were being tortured‐then he realised it was simply a life-size portrait, but the most realistic, and the most unpleasant, he had ever seen in his life.**

"Ugh," said Peter, shuddering. "I wonder who the old woman is."

**The old woman was drooling, her eyes were rolling, the yellowing skin of her face stretched taut as she screamed; **

"Oh no," groaned Sirius. "It looks like it's a portrait of my mother."

**and all along the hall behind them, the other portraits awoke and began to yell, too, so that Harry actually screwed up his eyes at the noise and clapped his hands over his ears.**

**Lupin and Mrs. Weasley darted forward and tried to tug the curtains shut over the old woman, but they would not close and she screeched louder than ever, brandishing clawed hands as though trying to tear at their faces.**

"Good thing she's a portrait and can't actually tear their faces," said Lily, shaking her head in disgust.

**'Filth! Scum! By-products of dirt and vileness! Half-breeds, mutants, freaks, begone from this place! How dare you befoul the house of my fathers ‐'**

"It really sounds like your mum, Padfoot," said James, shuddering.

**Tonks apologised over and over again, dragging the huge, heavy troll's leg back off the floor; Mrs. Weasley abandoned the attempt to close the curtains and hurried up and down the hall, stunning all the other portraits with her wand; and a man with long black hair came charging out of a door facing Harry.**

"Is it me?" asked Sirius, looking interested now. "It must be me, since I have long black hair."

**'Shut up, you horrible old hag, shut UP!' he roared, seizing the curtain Mrs. Weasley had abandoned.**

"If that is your mum, Sirius, she definitely sounds like a horrible old hag," said Lily.

**The old woman's face blanched.**

**'Yoooou!' she howled, her eyes popping at the sight of the man. 'Blood traitor, abomination, shame of my flesh!'**

Peter winced. "Yep, it sounds like your mum, Sirius. I can't believe a mother could ever be like that."

**'I said ‐ shut ‐ UP!' roared the man, and with a stupendous effort he and Lupin managed to force the curtains closed again.**

**The old woman's screeches died and an echoing silence fell. Panting slightly and sweeping his long dark hair out of his eyes, Harry's godfather Sirius turned to face him.**

**'Hello, Harry,' he said grimly, 'I see you've met my mother.'**

"I knew it," muttered Sirius angrily. "That's my dear old mum. Or rather, a portrait of her."

"Horrible," said Remus, shaking his head. "But why can't the portrait of Mrs. Black be removed?"

"Probably there's a permanent Sticking Charm attatched to it," said James sourly.

"Well, that's the end of the chapter," said Lily. "Who wants to read next?" Remus volunteered.

Author's Note: Someone (I can't remember who and I don't feel like looking up my reviews to find out) has suggested having Fred and George brought into the Room of Requirement so they can meet their idols and vice versa. So please vote in a review if you want Fred and George appearing so the Marauders and Lily can meet them. If a majority of reviewers vote yes, then I will have them appear in chapter six and maybe seven.


	5. The Order of the Phoenix

Author's Note: I wanted to have this up yesterday in honor of Fred and Geroge's birthday, but my sister hid this for an April Fool's Day prank and didn't give it back to me until this morning. It turns out she e-mailed to herself, then deleted the file on my computer. I got her back with a prank, though, so we're even. We're not Fred and George, or James and Sirius, so we didn't have a prank war. Besides, even if we did, it wouldn't last very long, since we're limited by the fact that we have no magic and not much imagination when it comes to pranks.

**CHAPTER FIVE **

**The Order of the Phoenix**

**'Your ‐?'**

**'My dear old mum, yeah,' said Sirius. 'We've been trying to get her down for a month but we think she put a Permanent Sticking Charm on the back of the canvas. Let's get downstairs, quick, before they all wake up again.'**

"Good idea," said James, grimacing.

**'But what's a portrait of your mother doing here?' Harry asked, bewildered, as they went through the door from the hall and led the way down a flight of narrow stone steps, the others just behind them.**

"It's there because this is Sirius' house," said Remus.

**'Hasn't anyone told you? This was my parents' house,' said Sirius. 'But I'm the last Black left, so it's mine now. I offered it to Dumbledore for Headquarters‐about the only useful thing I've been able to do.'**

Sirius grimaced. "I suppose I've been confined to the house since I'm still on the run."

**Harry, who had expected a better welcome, noted how hard and bitter Sirius's voice sounded. He followed his godfather to the bottom of the steps and through a door leading into the basement kitchen.**

**It was scarcely less gloomy than the hall above, a cavernous room with rough stone walls. Most of the light was coming from a large fire at the far end of the room. A haze of pipe smoke hung in the air like battle fumes, through which loomed the menacing shapes of heavy iron pots and pans hanging from the dark ceiling. Many chairs had been crammed into the room for the meeting and a long wooden table stood in the middle of them, littered with rolls of parchment, goblets, empty wine bottles, and a heap of what appeared to be rags. Mr. Weasley and his eldest son Bill were talking quietly with their heads together at the end of the table.**

"I suppose they're still discussing the meeting," said Peter.

**Mrs. Weasley cleared her throat. Her husband, a thin, balding, red-haired man who wore horn-rimmed glasses, looked around and jumped to his feet.**

**'Harry!' Mr. Weasley said, hurrying forward to greet him, and shaking his hand vigorously. 'Good to see you!'**

**Over his shoulder Harry saw Bill, who still wore his long hair in a ponytail, hastily rolling up the lengths of parchment left on the table.**

**'Journey all right, Harry?' Bill called, trying to gather up twelve scrolls at once. 'Mad-Eye didn't make you come via Greenland, then?'**

"Not for lack of trying though," commented Lily.

**'He tried,' said Tonks, striding over to help Bill and immediately toppling a candle on to the last piece of parchment. 'Oh no ‐sorry‐'**

"She's gotten even more clumsy," said Sirius, shaking his head in amusement.

**'Here, dear,' said Mrs. Weasley, sounding exasperated, and she repaired the parchment with a wave of her wand. In the flash of light caused by Mrs. Weasley's charm Harry caught a glimpse of what looked like the plan of a building.**

**Mrs. Weasley had seen him looking. She snatched the plan off the table and stuffed it into Bill's already overladen arms.**

"Oh no," said James. "Molly's too observant."

**'This sort of thing ought to be cleared away promptly at the end of meetings,' she snapped, before sweeping off towards an ancient dresser from which she started unloading dinner plates.**

**Bill took out his wand, muttered, 'Evanesco!' and the scrolls vanished.**

**'Sit down, Harry,' said Sirius. 'You've met Mundungus, haven't you?'**

"Where's Mundungus?" asked Peter, frowning. "Harry didn't see him."

**The thing Harry had taken to be a pile of rags gave a prolonged, grunting snore, then jerked awake.**

"Oh, so that's what the pile of rags is," said Lily. "Mundungus."

**'Some'n say m'name?' Mundungus mumbled sleepily. 'I 'gree with Sirius…' He raised a very grubby hand in the air as though voting, his droopy, bloodshot eyes unfocused.**

"Okay," said Remus, raising his eyebrows. "Well, at least he's agreeing with what Sirius wants."

**Ginny giggled.**

**'The meeting's over, Dung,' said Sirius, as they all sat down around him at the table. 'Harry's arrived.'**

**'Eh?'said Mundungus, peering balefully at Harry through his matted ginger hair. 'Blimey, so 'e 'as. Yeah… you all right, 'Arry?'**

**'Yeah,' said Harry.**

"But he's not really all right," said Lily. "Harry's just yelled at his friends, and he's not very happy at being left in the dark."

**Mundungus fumbled nervously in his pockets, still staring at Harry, and pulled out a grimy black pipe. He stuck it in his mouth, ignited the end of it with his wand and took a deep pull on it. Great billowing clouds of greenish smoke obscured him within seconds.**

**'Owe you a 'pology,' grunted a voice from the middle of the smelly cloud.**

**'For the last time, Mundungus,' called Mrs. Weasley, 'will you please not smoke that thing in the kitchen, especially not when we're about to eat!'**

James wrinkled his nose. "The smoke probably smells horrible."

**'Ah,' said Mundungus. 'Right. Sorry, Molly.'**

**The cloud of smoke vanished as Mundungus stowed his pipe back in his pocket, but an acrid smell of burning socks lingered.**

They all made faces and shuddered.

**'And if you want dinner before midnight I'll need a hand,' Mrs. Weasley said to the room at large. 'No, you can stay where you are, Harry dear, you've had a long journey.'**

**'What can I do, Molly?' said Tonks enthusiastically, bounding forwards.**

"Er, having Tonks helping in the kitchen is probably not a good idea," said Remus.

**Mrs. Weasley hesitated, looking apprehensive.**

"I would be apprehensive, too," said Peter.

**'Er ‐ no, it's all right, Tonks, you have a rest too, you've done enough today.'**

**'No, no, I want to help!' said Tonks brightly, knocking over a chair as she hurried towards the dresser, from which Ginny was collecting cutlery.**

"Not a good idea," said Sirius. "Tonks could trip and hurt someone while carrying a knife."

**Soon, a series of heavy knives were chopping meat and vegetables of their own accord, supervised by Mr. Weasley, while Mrs. Weasley stirred a cauldron dangling over the fire and the others took out plates, more goblets and food from the pantry. Harry was left at the table with Sirius and Mundungus, who was still blinking at him mournfully.**

**'Seen old Figgy since?' he asked.**

"Nope," said James. "Harry hasn't seen anyone since he was confined to his room except the Dursleys and the advance guard."

**'No,' said Harry, 'I haven't seen anyone.'**

**'See, I wouldn't 'ave left,' said Mundungus, leaning forward, a pleading note in his voice, 'but I 'ad a business opportunity-'**

"Buying stolen cauldrons isn't more important than my son's safety!" snapped Lily.

**Harry felt something brush against his knees and started, but it was only Crookshanks, Hermione's bandy-legged ginger cat, who wound himself once around Harry's legs, purring, then jumped on to Sirius's lap and curled up. Sirius scratched him absent-mindedly behind the ears as he turned, still grim-faced, to Harry.**

**'Had a good summer so far?'**

"Harry's summer has been completely lousy!" snapped Sirius. "Surely my future self would know that!"

**'No, it's been lousy,' said Harry.**

**For the first time, something like a grin flitted across Sirius's face.**

**'Don't know what you're complaining about, myself.'**

"Excuse me?" asked Sirius, blinking in surprise.

"Why did your future self just say that?" asked Peter.

**'What?' said Harry incredulously.**

**'Personally, I'd have welcomed a Dementor attack. A deadly struggle for my soul would have broken the monotony nicely. You think you've had it bad, at least you've been able to get out and about, stretch your legs, get into a few fights… I've been stuck inside for a month.'**

"Oh, so that's why," said Remus. "But why can't you just transform into Padfoot and go for a quick walk around the street?"

**'How come?' asked Harry, frowning.**

**'Because the Ministry of Magic's still after me, and Voldemort will know all about me being an Animagus by now, Wormtail will have told him, so my big disguise is useless. There's not much I can do for the Order of the Phoenix… or so Dumbledore feels.'**

"That's too bad, Sirius," said Lily. "Why can't Dumbledore find something for you to do?" Sirius shrugged.

"That's awful, mate," said James. "This is completely off the track, but do you think Fred and George know who the Marauders really are?"

"Probably," said Remus. "If they're living at Headquarters, they'll have found out by now that I'm Moony and Sirius is Padfoot."

"Hey, we should get the Room to have Fred and George appear when we finish the chapter!" suggested Sirius. "It'd be cool. We could have a prank war, and they could get to meet the Marauders as teenagers."

Peter looked excited. "That's a great idea! We'll get to meet the ones that are following our footsteps!"

James. "It is a great idea, Sirius. We really should do that."

Remus and Lily groaned and did not look at all happy. "No, don't have them arrive," said Lily. "Can you just imagine the mayhem it would cause?"

However, Sirius and James looked delighted with the idea. "Yeah, just imagine the chaos!" exclaimed Sirius happily.

"We'd have so much fun," said James. "A prank war with Fred and George would be just the thing."

Peter nodded. "It would be cool," he said, siding with James and Sirius.

Lily and Remus groaned again. "It's a terrible idea!" snapped Remus. "I don't want to deal with the chaos of having the Weasley twins here! Having Harry and his friends appear was enough!" The others, except for Lily, ignored him.

**There was something about the slightly flattened tone of voice in which Sirius uttered Dumbledore's name that told Harry that Sirius, too, was not very happy with the Headmaster. Harry felt a sudden upsurge of affection for his godfather.**

"That's nice of you, Harry," said Sirius, temporarily forgetting that he wanted to meet Fred and George.

**'At least you've known what's been going on,' he said bracingly.**

"That's true," said Peter. "But on the other hand, Sirius can't leave the house."

**'Oh yeah,' said Sirius sarcastically. 'Listening to Snape's reports, having to take all his snide hints that he's out there risking his life while I'm sat on my backside here having a nice comfortable time… asking me how the cleanings going ‐'**

"That does sound terrible," said James. "Really, Snivellus is unbearable."

**'What cleaning?' asked Harry.**

**'Trying to make this place fit for human habitation,' said Sirius, waving a hand around the dismal kitchen. 'No one's lived here for ten years, not since my dear mother died, unless you count her old house-elf, and he's gone round the twist, hasn't cleaned anything in ages.'**

"'Gone around the twist'?" asked Remus. "I suppose so, if there's nobody for him to talk to except the portraits."

**'Sirius,' said Mundungus, who did not appear to have paid any attention to the conversation, but had been closely examining an empty goblet. 'This solid silver, mate?'**

Lily looked disgusted. "I suppose he wants to get his hands on the goblets so he can sell them."

**'Yes,' said Sirius, surveying it with distaste. 'Finest fifteenth-century goblin-wrought silver, embossed with the Black family crest.'**

**'That'd come orf, though,' muttered Mundungus, polishing it with his cuff.**

**'Fred ‐ George ‐ NO, JUST CARRY THEM!' Mrs. Weasley shrieked.**

"The twins are doing magic?" asked Peter in surprise.

"Well, yeah," said Remus. "They said in the last book that they were turning of age in April, and they can Apparate now."

"Seeing as they're pranksters," said Sirius, "I'm willing to bet that their birthday is on April Fool's Day."

"That is the logical date for their birthday," said Lily thoughtfully.

James nodded. "I wish I was born on April Fool's Day. Well, having Fred and George possibly born on that day is good enough."

**Harry, Sirius and Mundungus looked round and, within a split second, they had dived away from the table. Fred and George had bewitched a large cauldron of stew, an iron flagon of Butterbeer and a heavy wooden breadboard, complete with knife, to hurtle through the air towards them. The stew skidded the length of the table and came to a halt just before the end, leaving a long black burn on the wooden surface; the flagon of Butterbeer fell with a crash, spilling its contents everywhere; the bread knife slipped off the board and landed, point down and quivering ominously, exactly where Sirius's right hand had been seconds before.**

Sirius winced. "Good thing I removed my hand."

**'FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE!' screamed Mrs. Weasley. 'THERE WAS NO NEED‐I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS‐JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE ALLOWED TO USE MAGIC NOW, YOU DON'T HAVE TO WHIP YOUR WANDS OUT FOR EVERY TINY LITTLE THING!'**

"She's angry," said James. "I wonder if my mum will sound like that when I start to do some magic over the holidays."

**'We were just trying to save a bit of time!' said Fred, hurrying forward to wrench the bread knife out of the table. 'Sorry, Sirius, mate‐didn't mean to‐'**

Sirius and James couldn't help laughing about it. Lily and Remus gave them reproving looks.

**Harry and Sirius were both laughing; **

"Why am I not surprised?" asked Remus, raising his eyes heavenward. "If the current Sirius is going to laugh about it, the future one will obviously do so."

**Mundungus, who had toppled backwards off his chair, was swearing as he got to his feet; Crookshanks had given an angry hiss and shot off under the dresser, from where his large yellow eyes glowed in the darkness.**

**'Boys,' Mr. Weasley said, lifting the stew back into the middle of the table, 'your mother's right, you're supposed to show a sense of responsibility now you've come of age‐'**

"Not that the twins will," muttered Lily. "They're prankster's through and through."

**'None of your brothers caused this sort of trouble!' Mrs. Weasley raged at the twins as she slammed a fresh flagon of Butterbeer on to the table, and spilling almost as much again. 'Bill didn't feel the need to Apparate every few feet! Charlie didn't charm everything he met! Percy‐'**

"Oh no, she's mentioned Percy," groaned Peter.

**She stopped dead, catching her breath with a frightened look at her husband, whose expression was suddenly wooden.**

**'Let's eat,' said Bill quickly.**

"So, a change of subject," said Lily. "To get away from mentioning Percy."

**'It looks wonderful, Molly,' said Lupin, ladling stew on to a plate for her and handing it across the table.**

"And it'll taste wonderful, too," said Sirius with longing. He quickly conjured some food and began eating.

**For a few minutes there was silence but for the chink of plates and cutlery and the scraping of chairs as everyone settled down to their food. Then Mrs. Weasley turned to Sirius.**

"I wonder what Molly wants with you, Sirius," said Peter.

**'I've been meaning to tell you, Sirius, there's something trapped in that writing desk in the drawing room, it keeps rattling and shaking. Of course, it could just be a Boggart, but I thought we ought to ask Alastor to have a look at it before we let it out.'**

"Oh yeah," said James. "Moody'll be able to see through the desk to see if it's a boggart."

"And he'll probably be able to see it in its natural form," said Remus.

"I wonder what else he'll be able to see with that magical eye of his," said Sirius. "Like through a witch's-"

"Sirius Orion Black!" snapped Lily. "We've already gone through this once! Get that filthy idea out of your head!"

**'Whatever you like,' said Sirius indifferently.**

"Looks like you don't care very much about it," commented Remus.

**'The curtains in there are full of Doxys, too,' Mrs. Weasley went on. 'I thought we might try and tackle them tomorrow.'**

"That'll be fun," said James sarcastically. "I bet Harry'll be asked to help out with getting rid of the doxies."

**'I look forward to it,' said Sirius. Harry heard the sarcasm in his voice, but he was not sure that anyone else did.**

**Opposite Harry, Tonks was entertaining Hermione and Ginny by transforming her nose between mouthfuls. **

"That's nice of Tonks," said Peter. "I wonder what kind of noses she'll be doing."

**Screwing up her eyes each time with the same pained expression she had worn back in Harry's bedroom, her nose swelled to a beak-like protuberance that resembled Snape's, **

"Urgh," they all said, grimacing.

**shrank to the size of a button mushroom and then sprouted a great deal of hair from each nostril. Apparently this was a regular mealtime entertainment, because Hermione and Ginny were soon requesting their favourite noses.**

**'Do that one like a pig snout, Tonks.' ****Tonks obliged, and Harry, looking up, had the fleeting impression that a female Dudley was grinning at him from across the table.**

"Double urgh!" they exclaimed.

**Mr. Weasley, Bill and Lupin were having an intense discussion about goblins.**

**'They're not giving anything away yet,' said Bill. 'I still can't work out whether or not they believe he's back. Course, they might prefer not to take sides at all. Keep out of it.'**

"That's possible," said James. "But I very much doubt the goblins would join Voldemort. After all the attacks on goblins going on right now, I don't see them going over to him in the second war."

**'I'm sure they'd never go over to You-Know-Who,' said Mr Weasley, shaking his head. They've suffered losses too; remember that goblin family he murdered last time, somewhere near Nottingham?'**

"Mr. Weasley seems to agree with you, James," said Lily.

**'I think it depends what they're offered,' said Lupin. 'And I'm not talking about gold. If they're offered the freedoms we've been denying them for centuries they're going to be tempted. **

"Yeah, that's true," said Remus. "Voldemort might become smart and offer them some rights if they join him and he wins."

**Have you still not had any luck with Ragnok, Bill?'**

**'He's feeling pretty anti-wizard at the moment,' said Bill, 'he hasn't stopped raging about the Bagman business, he reckons the Ministry did a cover-up, those goblins never got their gold from him, you know ‐'**

"The Ministry didn't do a cover-up!" exclaimed Peter. "Bagman ran for it!"

**A gale of laughter from the middle of the table drowned the rest of Bill's words. Fred, George, Ron and Mundungus were rolling around in their seats.**

**"… and then,' choked Mundungus, tears running down his face, 'and then, if you'll believe it, 'e says to me, 'e says, 'Ere, Dung, where didja get all them toads from? 'Cos some son of a Bludger's gone and nicked all mine!' And I says, 'Nicked all your toads, Will, what next? So you'll be wanting some more, then?'**

"And I suppose Mundungus has the oads and sells them back to WIll for lots of money," said Sirius, grinning.

**And if you'll believe me, lads, the gormless gargoyle buys all 'is own toads back orf me for a lot more'n what 'e paid in the first place‐"**

James and Sirius began laughing, and then Peter joined in. Lily and Remus looked disapproving, Lily most of all.

**'I don't think we need to hear any more of your business dealings, thank you very much, Mundungus,' said Mrs. Weasley sharply, as Ron slumped forwards on to the table, howling with laughter.**

**'Beg pardon, Molly,' said Mundungus at once, wiping his eyes and winking at Harry. 'But, you know, Will nicked 'em orf Warty Harris in the first place so I wasn't really doing nothing wrong.'**

"Really?" asked Lily coldly. "Nothing wrong? It looks like Mundungus never learned the difference between right and wrong."

"Yeah," said Remus, nodding. "Just because Will nick-, er, stole the toads in the first place doesn't mean it's all right to steal them and sell them back for a higher price."

**'I don't know where you learned about right and wrong, Mundungus, but you seem to have missed a few crucial lessons,' said Mrs. Weasley coldly.**

**Fred and George buried their faces in their goblets of Butterbeer; George was hiccoughing. For some reason, Mrs. Weasley threw a very nasty look at Sirius before getting to her feet and going to fetch a large rhubarb crumble for pudding. **

"Hey, why is she glaring at me?" asked Sirius. "I'm not the one that's responsible for Dung's behavior!"

**Harry looked round at his godfather.**

**'Molly doesn't approve of Mundungus,' said Sirius in an undertone.**

"I can see why," said James dryly.

**'How come he's in the Order?' Harry said, very quietly.**

"He must be useful somehow," said Peter. "But I don't see how."

**'He's useful,' Sirius muttered. 'Knows all the crooks ‐ well, he would, seeing as he's one himself. But he's also very loyal to Dumbledore, who helped him out of a tight spot once. It pays to have someone like Dung around, he hears things we don't. But Molly thinks inviting him to stay for dinner is going too far. She hasn't forgiven him for slipping off duty when he was supposed to be tailing you.'**

"I haven't forgiven him," snapped Lily. "Thinking a shady business deal was more important than guarding my son!"

**Three helpings of rhubarb crumble and custard later and the waistband on Harry's jeans was feeling uncomfortably tight (which was saying something as the jeans had once been Dudley's). As he laid down his spoon there was a lull in the general conversation: Mr Weasley was leaning back in his chair, looking replete and relaxed; Tonks was yawning widely, her nose now back to normal; and Ginny, who had lured Crookshanks out from under the dresser, was sitting cross-legged on the floor, rolling Butterbeer corks for him to chase.**

**'Nearly time for bed, I think,' said Mrs. Weasley with a yawn.**

"Probably," said Remus. "It is getting pretty late."

**'Not just yet, Molly,' said Sirius, pushing away his empty plate and turning to look at Harry. 'You know, I'm surprised at you. I thought the first thing you'd do when you got here would be to start asking questions about Voldemort.'**

They all sat bolt upright. James said a bit uncertainly, "Well, Harry did ask about Voldemort, but Ron and Hermione weren't able to tell him much."

**The atmosphere in the room changed with the rapidity Harry associated with the arrival of Dementors. Where seconds before it had been sleepily relaxed, it was now alert, even tense. A frisson had gone around the table at the mention of Voldemort's name. Lupin, who had been about to take a sip of wine, lowered his goblet slowly, looking wary.**

**'I did!' said Harry indignantly. 'I asked Ron and Hermione but they said we're not allowed in the Order, so‐'**

**'And they're quite right,' said Mrs. Weasley. 'You're too young.'**

"I guess," said Sirius. "But that doesn't mean that Harry can't get a general picture of what's going on."

**She was sitting bolt upright in her chair, her fists clenched on its arms, every trace of drowsiness gone.**

**'Since when did someone have to be in the Order of the Phoenix to ask questions?' asked Sirius. 'Harry's been trapped in that Muggle house for a month. He's got the right to know what's been happen—'**

"Yeah!" exclaimed Peter. "Harry should know something of what's going on."

**'Hang on!' interrupted George loudly.**

**'How come Harry gets his questions answered?' said Fred angrily.**

**'We've been trying to get stuff out of you for a month and you haven't told us a single stinking thing!' said George.**

"That's because you're not part of the Order and don't have Voldemort after you!" exclaimed Lily.

**"'You're too young, you're not in the Order,'" said Fred, in a high-pitched voice that sounded uncannily like his mother's. 'Harry's not even of age!'**

**'It's not my fault you haven't been told what the Order's doing,' said Sirius calmly, 'that's your parents' decision. **

"That too," said Sirius. "But I'm Harry's godfather and part guardian, and so I can decide if I want Harry to be briefed."

**Harry, on the other hand‐'**

**'It's not down to you to decide what's good for Harry!' said Mrs. Weasley sharply. The expression on her normally kind face looked dangerous. 'You haven't forgotten what Dumbledore said, I suppose?'**

**'Which bit?' Sirius asked politely, but with the air of a man readying himself for a fight.**

**'The bit about not telling Harry more than he needs to know,' said Mrs. Weasley, placing a heavy emphasis on the last three words.**

"Sirius is not going to tell Harry more than he needs to know!" exclaimed Remus. "I'm there, and I can make sure Sirius does as told." Sirius gave him a wry smile.

**Ron, Hermione, Fred and George's heads swivelled from Sirius to Mrs. Weasley as though they were following a tennis rally. Ginny was kneeling amid a pile of abandoned Butterbeer corks, watching the conversation with her mouth slightly open. Lupin's eyes were fixed on Sirius.**

**'I don't intend to tell him more than he needs to know, Molly,' said Sirius. 'But as he was the one who saw Voldemort come back' (again, there was a collective shudder around the table at the name) **

"It's just a name!" said James in exasperation. "He's not going to appear just because you've said his name."

**'he has more right than most to ‐'**

**'He's not a member of the Order of the Phoenix!' said Mrs. Weasley. 'He's only fifteen and‐'**

**'And he's dealt with as much as most in the Order,' said Sirius, 'and more than some.'**

Peter nodded. "Harry has done lots of great and dangerous things."

**'No one's denying what he's done!' said Mrs. Weasley, her voice rising, her fists trembling on the arms of her chair. 'But he's still ‐'**

**'He's not a child!' said Sirius impatiently.**

"Sirius," said James, looking at Sirius. "Harry might not be a child, but he's not an adult yet, either. You have to be careful with him."

**'He's not an adult either!' said Mrs. Weasley, the colour rising in her cheeks. 'He's not James, Sirius!'**

"I know who Harry is!" shouted Sirius. "I know he's not James."

**'I'm perfectly clear who he is, thanks, Molly,' said Sirius coldly.**

**'I'm not sure you are!'said Mrs. Weasley. 'Sometimes, the way you talk about him, it's as though you think you've got your best friend back!'**

"Well, he does look like James," said Remus.

**'What's wrong with that?' said Harry.**

**'What's wrong, Harry, is that you are not your father, however much you might look like him!' said Mrs. Weasley, her eyes still boring into Sirius. 'You are still at school and adults responsible for you should not forget it!'**

"Are you saying that Sirius is an irresponsible godfather?" asked Lily. "I admit that he's not exactly the best, but he did give Harry good advice all throughout the last book. He warned Harry to be careful and came back to Britain just to keep an eye on him."

**'Meaning I'm an irresponsible godfather?' demanded Sirius, his voice rising.**

**'Meaning you have been known to act rashly, Sirius, which is why Dumbledore keeps reminding you to stay at home and-'**

**'We'll leave my instructions from Dumbledore out of this, if you please!' said Sirius loudly.**

"Not good," said Peter. "Sirius and Molly are arguing over Harry."

**'Arthur!' said Mrs. Weasley, rounding on her husband. 'Arthur, back me up!'**

**Mr. Weasley did not speak at once. He took off his glasses and cleaned them slowly on his robes, not looking at his wife. Only when he had replaced them carefully on his nose did he reply.**

**'Dumbledore knows the position has changed, Molly. He accepts that Harry will have to be filled in, to a certain extent, now that he is staying at Headquarters.'**

"It looks like Arthur is sort of on Sirius' side," commented Lily.

**'Yes, but there's a difference between that and inviting him to ask whatever he likes!'**

**'Personally,' said Lupin quietly, looking away from Sirius at last, as Mrs. Weasley turned quickly to him, hopeful that finally she was about to get an ally, 'I think it better that Harry gets the facts - not all the facts, Molly, but the general picture‐from us, rather than a garbled version from… others.'**

"Good for you, Remus," said James. "You're offering a suitable compromise."

**His expression was mild, but Harry felt sure Lupin, at least, knew that some Extendable Ears had survived Mrs. Weasley's purge.**

"Well, I am a Marauder," said Remus.

**'Well,' said Mrs. Weasley, breathing deeply and looking around the table for support that did not come, 'well… I can see I'm going to be overruled. I'll just say this: Dumbledore must have had his reasons for not wanting Harry to know too much, and speaking as someone who has Harry's best interests at heart ‐'**

"It looks like Molly sees Harry as a son," said Peter.

**'He's not your son,' said Sirius quietly.**

**'He's as good as,' said Mrs. Weasley fiercely. **

"It's nice of her to say so," admitted Sirius. "it's like when your mum sort of adopted me, James."

**'Who else has he got?'**

**'He's got me!'**

**'Yes,' said Mrs. Weasley, her lip curling, 'the thing is, it's been rather difficult for you to look after him while you've been locked up in Azkaban, hasn't it?'**

"When did she start sounding like Snape?" asked Remus, frowning.

**Sirius started to rise from his chair.**

**'Molly, you're not the only person at this table who cares about Harry,' said Lupin sharply. 'Sirius, sit down.'**

**Mrs. Weasley's lower lip was trembling. Sirius sank slowly back into his chair, his face white.**

**'I think Harry ought to be allowed a say in this,' Lupin continued, 'he's old enough to decide for himself.'**

"Yeah, Harry should have some say in it," said James.

**'I want to know what's been going on,' Harry said at once.**

**He did not look at Mrs. Weasley. He had been touched by what she had said about his being as good as a son, but he was also impatient with her mollycoddling. Sirius was right, he was not a child.**

"But you're not an adult, either, Harry," protested Lily. "you need some limits."

**'Very well,' said Mrs Weasley, her voice cracking. 'Ginny‐Ron‐Hermione‐Fred‐George‐I want you out of this kitchen, now.'**

"And they're not going to be happy over Harry being able to be told things and they can't," said Peter.

**There was instant uproar.**

"Thought so," commented Sirius. "Fred and George are of age, after all. Though if Ron and Hermione aren't allowed to listen, Harry will tell what was said, anyway."

**'We're of age!' Fred and George bellowed together.**

**'If Harry's allowed, why can't I?' shouted Ron.**

**'Mum, I want to hear!' wailed Ginny.**

"I doubt Ginny will be allowed to listen, though," said Peter.

**'NO!' shouted Mrs. Weasley, standing up, her eyes overbright. 'I absolutely forbid‐'**

**'Molly, you can't stop Fred and George,' said Mr. Weasley wearily. 'They are of age.'**

"That's true," said James. "They are of age and really can't be stopped."

**'They're still at school.'**

**'But they're legally adults now,' said Mr. Weasley, in the same tired voice.**

**Mrs. Weasley was now scarlet in the face.**

**'I ‐ oh, all right then, Fred and George can stay, but Ron‐'**

"Harry will just tell Ron and Hermione everything that's said, Molly," pointed out Sirius. "So you might as well let them stay and listen."

**'Harry'll tell me and Hermione everything you say anyway!' said Ron hotly. 'Won't ‐ won't you?' he added uncertainly, meeting Harry's eyes.**

**For a split second, Harry considered telling Ron that he wouldn't tell him a single word, that he could try a taste of being kept in the dark and see how he liked it. But the nasty impulse vanished as they looked at each other.**

"Good,' said Lily. "if you had followed through with that nasty impulse, Harry, I would have been very mad."

**'Course I will,' Harry said.**

**Ron and Hermione beamed.**

**'Fine!' shouted Mrs. Weasley. 'Fine! Ginny‐BED!'**

"She's not going to go quietly, though," said Remus.

**Ginny did not go quietly. **

"As I expected," said Remus. "If the others can listen, she'll want to as well."

**They could hear her raging and storming at her mother all the way up the stairs, and when she reached the hall Mrs. Black's ear-splitting shrieks were added to the din. Lupin hurried off to the portrait to restore calm. It was only after he had returned, closing the kitchen door behind him and taking his seat at the table again, that Sirius spoke.**

**'OK, Harry… what do you want to know?'**

"Obviously where Voldemort is and what he's up to," said James at once."

**Harry took a deep breath and asked the question that had obsessed him for the last month.**

**'Where's Voldemort?' he said, ignoring the renewed shudders and winces at the name. 'What's he doing? I've been trying to watch the Muggle news, and there hasn't been anything that looks like him yet, no funny deaths or anything.'**

**That's because there haven't been any funny deaths yet,' said Sirius, 'not as far as we know, anyway… and we know quite a lot.'**

**'More than he thinks we do, anyway,' said Lupin.**

**'How come he's stopped killing people?' Harry asked. He knew Voldemort had murdered more than once in the last year alone.**

"Probably because he doesn't want to draw attention to himself when he doesn't have all that much power," said Lily. "He only has like twenty Death Eaters and they won't be enough for him to invade the Ministry or something."

**'Because he doesn't want to draw attention to himself,' said Sirius. 'It would be dangerous for him. His comeback didn't come off quite the way he wanted it to, you see. He messed it up.'**

**'Or rather, you messed it up for him,' said Lupin, with a satisfied smile.**

**'How?' Harry asked, perplexed.**

"By your surviving and reporting it to Dumbledore, of course!" exclaimed Sirius.

**'You weren't supposed to survive!' said Sirius. 'Nobody apart from his Death Eaters was supposed to know he'd come back. But you survived to bear witness.'**

**'And the very last person he wanted alerted to his return the moment he got back was Dumbledore,' said Lupin. 'And you made sure Dumbledore knew at once.'**

**'How has that helped?' Harry asked.**

"Dumbledore is the only person Moldywart's scare of," said Peter. "And he started up the Order again to fight him."

**'Are you kidding?' said Bill incredulously. 'Dumbledore was the only one You-Know-Who was ever scared of!'**

**'Thanks to you, Dumbledore was able to recall the Order of the Phoenix about an hour after Voldemort returned,' said Sirius.**

"That's good," said James.

**'So, what's the Order been doing?' said Harry, looking around at them all.**

**'Working as hard as we can to make sure Voldemort can't carry out his plans,' said Sirius.**

**'How d'you know what his plans are?' Harry asked quickly.**

"Maybe Snape is spying on the Death Eaters for Dumbledore," said Lily.

**'Dumbledore's got a shrewd idea,' said Lupin, 'and Dumbledore's shrewd ideas normally turn out to be accurate.'**

**'So what does Dumbledore reckon he's planning?'**

**'Well, firstly, he wants to build up his army again,' said Sirius. 'In the old days he had huge numbers at his command: witches and wizards he'd bullied or bewitched into following him, his faithful Death Eaters, a great variety of Dark creatures. You heard him planning to recruit the giants; well, they'll be just one of the groups he's after. He's certainly not going to try and take on the Ministry of Magic with only a dozen Death Eaters.'**

"Who else is going to try to get?" asked Peter. "The goblins, werewolves, and vampires?"

"Probably," answered Remus. "And some other magical beings that aren't being treated as equals by the Ministry."

**'So you're trying to stop him getting more followers?'**

**'We're doing our best,' said Lupin.**

**'How?'**

**'Well, the main thing is to try and convince as many people as possible that You-Know-Who really has returned, to put them on their guard,' said Bill. 'It's proving tricky, though.'**

**'Why?'**

"Because the Ministry won't accept the fact that Voldemort's back!" snapped Sirius.

**'Because of the Ministry's attitude,' said Tonks. 'You saw Cornelius Fudge after You-Know-Who came back, Harry. Well, he hasn't shifted his position at all. He's absolutely refusing to believe it's happened.'**

"But why does he have to be so stupid?" demanded Lily. "Harry saw Voldemort return and Dumbledore backed him up!"

**'But why?' said Harry desperately. 'Why's he being so stupid? If Dumbledore‐'**

**'Ah, well, you've put your finger on the problem,' said Mr. Weasley with a wry smile. 'Dumbledore.'**

"Why is Dumbledore the problem?" asked Peter.

**'Fudge is frightened of him, you see,' said Tonks sadly.**

"How in Merlin's name can Fudge be frightened of Dumbledore?" asked Remus incredulously.

**'Frightened of Dumbledore?' said Harry incredulously.**

**'Frightened of what he's up to,' said Mr. Weasley. 'Fudge thinks Dumbledore's plotting to overthrow him. He thinks Dumbledore wants to be Minister for Magic.'**

"But Dumbledore doesn't want to be Minister of Magic!" exclaimed Sirius. "It said so in the first book!"

**'But Dumbledore doesn't want‐'**

**'Of course he doesn't,' said Mr. Weasley. 'He's never wanted the Minister'****s job, even though a lot of people wanted him to take it when Millicent Bagnold retired. Fudge came to power instead, but ****he's never quite forgotten how much popular support Dumbledore had, even though Dumbledore never applied for the job.'**

"But that's silly!" exclaimed James. "Dumbledore's not Fudge's enemy! If they're both against Voldemort, then they're on the same side! Dumbledore said so in the last book!"

**'Deep down, Fudge knows Dumbledore's much cleverer than he is, a much more powerful wizard, and in the early days of his Ministry he was forever asking Dumbledore for help and advice,' said Lupin. 'But it seems he's become fond of power, and much more confident. He loves being Minister for Magic and he's managed to convince himself that he's the clever one and Dumbledore's simply stirring up trouble for the sake of it.'**

"But-," spluttered Peter. "How can Fudge even think that Dumbledore would make it all up?"

**'How can he think that?' said Harry angrily. 'How can he think Dumbledore would just make it all up ‐ that I'd make it all up?'**

**'Because accepting that Voldemort's back would mean trouble like the Ministry hasn't had to cope with for nearly fourteen years,' said Sirius bitterly. 'Fudge just can't bring himself to face it. It's so much more comfortable to convince himself Dumbledore's lying to destabilise him.'**

"But-!" exclaimed Remus. "Dumbledore would never do such a thing!' Sirius quickly grabbed his miscellaneous list and began listing Fudge's shortcomings in regards to Dumbledore and Voldemort's return.

**'You see the problem,' said Lupin. 'While the Ministry insists there is nothing to fear from Voldemort it's hard to convince people he's back, especially as they really don't want to believe it in the first place. What's more, the Ministry's leaning heavily on the Daily Prophet not to report any of what they're calling Dumbledore's rumour-mongering, so most of the wizarding community are completely unaware any things happened, and that makes them easy targets for the Death Eaters if they're using the Imperius Curse.'**

"Oh dear," said Lily. "The Ministry's resorting to censoring, when I thought only countries like the USSR or something limited freedom of speech."

**'But you're telling people, aren't you?' said Harry, looking around at Mr. Weasley, Sirius, Bill, Mundungus, Lupin and Tonks. 'You're letting people know he's back?'**

"Well, I can't, since I'm on the run," said Sirius wryly. "And Moony isn't going to be welcomed in many wizarding homes for being a werewolf."

"And not many people are going to listen to someone connected to the low-life," said Remus. "And Tonks and Arthur would probably be fired if they spread the word about Voldemort's return."

**They all smiled humourlessly.**

**'Well, as everyone thinks I'm a mad mass-murderer and the Ministry's put a ten thousand Galleon price on my head, I can hardly stroll up the street and start handing out leaflets, can I?' said Sirius restlessly.**

"Like I said," said Sirius, shaking his head.

**'And I'm not a very popular dinner guest with most of the community,' said Lupin. 'It's an occupational hazard of being a werewolf.'**

"Well, of course," said Remus sarcastically.

"It's not fair," Peter burst out. "You're not dangerous." Remus smiled at him.

**'Tonks and Arthur would lose their jobs at the Ministry if they started shooting their mouths off,' said Sirius, 'and it's very important for us to have spies inside the Ministry, because you can bet Voldemort will have them.'**

**'We've managed to convince a couple of people, though,' said Mr. Weasley. 'Tonks here, for one -**

"Oh right, she'd be too young to join the Order now," said Lily.

**she's too young to have been in the Order of the Phoenix last time, and having Aurors on our side is a huge advantage‐Kingsley Shacklebolt's been a real asset, too; he's in charge of the hunt for Sirius, so he's been feeding the Ministry information that Sirius is in Tibet.'**

"Well, that's a relief," said James. "Good of Kingsley to do so."

**'But if none of you are putting the news out that Voldemorts back‐' Harry began.**

**'Who said none of us are putting the news out?' said Sirius. 'Why d'you think Dumbledore's in such trouble?'**

"Just how much trouble is Dumbledore in?" asked Peter.

**'What d'you mean?' Harry asked.**

**'They're trying to discredit him,' said Lupin. 'Didn't you see the Daily Prophet last week? They reported that he'd been voted out of the Chairmanship of the International Confederation of Wizards because he's getting old and losing his grip, **

"What!" they all gasped, shocked and furious.

**but it's not true; he was voted out by Ministry wizards after he made a speech announcing Voldemort's return. They've demoted him from Chief Warlock on the Wizengamot‐that's the Wizard High Court‐and they're talking about taking away his Order of Merlin, First Class, too.'**

"They can't do that!" snapped Remus. "If they're going to take an Order of Merlin away, then take the one Lockhart was granted."

**'But Dumbledore says he doesn't care what they do as long as they don't take him off the Chocolate Frog Cards,' said Bill, grinning.**

"How can Dumbledore make a joke about this?" asked James.

"Maybe he wasn't joking," suggested Lily. "Maybe his cards are linked and can give Dumbledore information on their owners."

"Maybe," said Sirius, though he sounded skeptical.

**'It's no laughing matter,' said Mr. Weasley sharply. 'If he carries on defying the Ministry like this he could end up in Azkaban, and the last thing we want is to have Dumbledore locked up. While You-Know-Who knows Dumbledore's out  
there and wise to what he's up to he's going to go cautiously. If Dumbledore's out of the way‐well, You-Know-Who will have a clear field.'**

"That's not good," said Peter. "We don't want that happening."

**'But if Voldemort's trying to recruit more Death Eaters it's bound to get out that he's come back, isn't it?' asked Harry desperately.**

**'Voldemort doesn't march up to people's houses and bang on their front doors, Harry,' said Sirius. 'He tricks, jinxes and blackmails them. He's well-practised at operating in secret. In any case, gathering followers is only one thing he's interested in. He's got other plans too, plans he can put into operation very quietly indeed, and he's concentrating on those for the moment.'**

"Well, what Voldemort be after besides followers?" asked Remus. "A weapon of some sort?"

**'What's he after apart from followers?' Harry asked swiftly. He thought he saw Sirius and Lupin exchange the most fleeting of looks before Sirius answered.**

**'Stuff he can only get by stealth.'**

**When Harry continued to look puzzled, Sirius said, 'Like a weapon. Something he didn't have last time.'**

"So what weapon would it be?" asked Peter.

"Well, it can't be anything Muggle like guns," said Lily.

**'When he was powerful before?'**

**'Yes.'**

**'Like what kind of weapon?' said Harry. 'Something worse than the Avada Kedavra‐?'**

**'That's enough!'**

"Looks like Molly's back," said Sirius, groaning.

**Mrs. Weasley spoke from the shadows beside the door. Harry hadn't noticed her return from taking Ginny upstairs. Her arms were crossed and she looked furious.**

**'I want you in bed, now. All of you,' she added, looking around at Fred, George, Ron and Hermione.**

**'You can't boss us ‐' Fred began.**

"Actually, she can," said Remus. "Even though you're of age, you're still living with your parents, and they have sopme say in what you do."

**'Watch me,' snarled Mrs. Weasley. She was trembling slightly as she looked at Sirius. 'You've given Harry plenty of information. Any more and you might just as well induct him into the Order straightaway.'**

**'Why not?' said Harry quickly. 'I'll join, I want to join, I want to fight.'**

"No, you can't!" exclaimed Lily. "Harry, you can't just skip out of school to do things for the Order! And you'll have to face Voldemort soon enough already. You needn't concern yourself with Order missions right now."

**'No.'**

**It was not Mrs. Weasley who spoke this time, but Lupin.**

"I think the same as Lily, apparently," said Remus mildly, though he did look a bit surprised.

**'The Order is comprised only of overage wizards,' he said. 'Wizards who have left school,' he added, as Fred and George opened their mouths. 'There are dangers involved of which you can have no idea, any of you… I think Molly's right, Sirius. We've said enough.'**

Sirius shrugged. "Well, I guess so. Though I wish Harry could have been told a bit more."

**Sirius half-shrugged but did not argue. Mrs. Weasley beckoned imperiously to her sons and Hermione. One by one they stood up and Harry, recognising defeat, followed suit.**

"Well, that was an interesting chapter," said James. "So, what do we do about Fred and George appearing?"

"I'm all for it," said Sirius instantly.

"No, don't!" snapped Lily. "Just think of the mayhem!"

"Which is why I want them here," said Sirius.

Remus groaned. "No, I can't stand the chaos! You guys said you wanted to have a prank war with them!"

They all looked at Peter. "What do you think?"

Peter thought for a minute, then said, "Well, I think that-"

Author's Note: So far, a majority of reviewers have said they want Fred and George appearing, so it look like they are. However, the voting is still going on and it could change. You'll find out the results next chapter.


	6. Noble and Most Ancient House of Black

**Author's Note: I am extremely sorry about the long time it took to update. I was busy with school, and I had to work out some kinks with this chapter. I'm sure my readers were able to occupy themselves with fics that are as good or better than mine. Here's the chapter. Oh, and if you have any good prank ideas for the prank war, send them to me in a review or pm. I'll use them in the next chapter, which won't take so long to update as this one was.**

Peter finished, "Yes to Fred and George coming." Lily and Remus groaned loudly, while James and Sirius looked delighted. They instantly made their wish and Fred and George appeared, wands and sweets in their hands. When they spotted Lily and the Marauders, they looked around, confused.

Remus quickly explained what was going on. "Oh, so that's what happened," said Fred. His eyes lit up. "Wow, we're actually meeting our idols as teenagers!"

George bowed. "We bow to your greatness and worship you, O Mighty Marauders." He then looked at Peter. "If you're reading books about Harry Potter, then you know what Wormtail-"

"We do," interrupted Lily. "But Peter feels really bad about what his future self did in the books and took an Unbreakable Vow to never join Voldemort and betray us."

"Okay," said Fred. "Hey, that means the future will be changed!"

James nodded, then pointed at the sweets. "What are those? Trick sweets?"

"Sort of," responded George. "They're part of the Skiving Snackboxes we invented. It's a range of sweets that will make you ill."

"Not seriously ill, mind," added Fred. "Just enough to get you out of class. We've got Fainting Fancies, Puking Pastilles, Nosebleed Nougats, and Fever Fudges. One end will make you sick, while the other end make you healthy again once you're out of class."

Sirius looked impressed. "Wish we could have one of the Skiving Snackboxes now. I could use one to get out of class."

"We're really impressed by all that we've read about you," said Remus. "Sirius and James say you're the next Marauders."

"And we're really glad that you got the Marauders' Map," said Peter. "We couldn't think of anyone better to get it, besides Harry of course."

Fred and George grinned. "Well, that Map helped us out of so many fixes," said Fred. "It was a wrench giving it away to Harry, but he needed it more than we did. And when we found out who the Marauders were, we knew that giving it to Harry was the right thing."

"How did you find out how to work the Map?" asked Lily.

"Well, we figured out that it had to be hiding something," said George. "We first tried to see if it was using invisible ink. When it wasn't, we asked it to reveal its secret."

"The Marauders started replying," continued Fred. "It must have realized that we were pranksters, because it congratulated us on getting our hands on it, and then gave us a few hints."

"We read the hints, and managed to puzzle out how the map worked," concluded George. "One of the hints was, 'Mr. Moony says that if you are up to no good, then please tap the parchment with your wand and solemnly swear.' And another was, 'Mr. Padfoot would like to add that once your mischief is managed, to please tap the parchment and say so.' We worked those out."

"Cool," said Peter. "It was smart of you to figure it out."

James nodded. "Anyway, how about a prank war? Sirius and me against you twins."

Fred and George eagerly agreed to the idea, while Lily and Remus groaned. The rules were that all pranks would be funny, but not harmful or too embarassing, and the Room of Requirement could not be used except to provide materials for a prank. It could not be used to wish for a prank to happen. A scoreboard was conjured and Remus was in charge of keeping track of the score.

James and Sirius held a whispered conversation, then hit Fred and George with a spell that made thier hair and robes flash green and silver. The twins banished the charm, then forced a Canary Cream down James' and Sirius' throats. A minute later, they were transformed into large canaries. Remus marked a tally each on both sides of the scoreboard.

Once James and Sirius had molted, they tossed itching powder on the twins, who began itching all over their body. Remus added another tally on the Marauders' side of the scoreboard. Once the twins had stopped itching, they hit Sirius and James with a spell that made them float up in the air and start doing the chicken dance. Lily, Peter, and Remus burst out into laughter.

Two more pranks later, the prank war temporarily stopped. Lily picked up the book. "I'll read chapter six now. We can resume the prank war once it's over."

**CHAPTER SIX  
The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black**

Sirius snorted. "It is ancient, but it's not very noble."

**Mrs. Weasley followed them upstairs looking grim. **

**'I want you all to go straight to bed, no talking,' she said as they reached the first landing, 'we've got a busy day tomorrow. I expect Ginny's asleep,' she added to Hermione, 'so try not to wake her up.'**

"Yeah right," said Fred. "Know what I said? I said, 'If Ginny's not lying awake waiting for Hermione-"

"Enough, George, I mean Fred," interrupted Lily. "I'm going to read what you said in a second."

**'Asleep, yeah, right,' said Fred in an undertone, after Hermione bade them goodnight and they were climbing to the next floor. 'If Ginny's not lying awake waiting for Hermione to tell her everything they said downstairs then I'm a Flobberworm -'**

**'All right, Ron, Harry,' said Mrs. Weasley on the second landing, pointing them into their bedroom. 'Off to bed with you.'**

"However, they probably won't go to sleep right away," said Remus. "They'll likely stay up a bit to discuss what they've heard."

"Yeah," said George. "Fred and I-" He broked off as a piece of paper fell in his lap. He picked it up and read out loud, "Okay, please keep quiet, Fred and George. You can make comments, but you're not supposed to reveal what you or anyone else did in the book, even if it's later on in the chapter. Lily and the Marauders will read about it eventually. Now, you can disobey me and do what you like, but if you do, I'll have you removed from the Room of Requirement and send you back to your own time and you'll never finish the prank war. I have the power to do so, you know. So keep your mouth shut about future events. Yours truly, Perdita, the sender of the books."

"When we brought in Harry and his friends, they got a note too," said James. "It also told them not to go about revealing future events."

Fred and George sighed. "Okay, we'll keep our mouth shut about future events."

**'Night,' Harry and Ron said to the twins.**

**'Sleep tight,' said Fred, winking.**

"What are you guys up to?" asked Lily.

"You'll see," answered George. "We can't tell you in case we get sent back to our own time."

**Mrs. Weasley closed the door behind Harry with a sharp snap. The bedroom looked, if anything, even danker and gloomier than it had on first sight. The blank picture on the wall was now breathing very slowly and deeply, as though its invisible occupant was asleep. Harry put on his pyjamas, took off his glasses and climbed into his chilly bed while Ron threw Owl Treats up on top of the wardrobe to pacify Hedwig and Pigwidgeon, who were clattering around and rustling their wings restlessly.**

**'We can't let them out to hunt every night,' Ron explained as he pulled on his maroon pyjamas. 'Dumbledore doesn't want too many owls swooping around the square, thinks it'll look suspicious. Oh yeah… I forgot…'**

**He crossed to the door and bolted it.**

**'What're you doing that for?'**

"Because of Kreacher," said Fred. "He'll come wandering in if you don't bolt the door."

**'Kreacher,' said Ron as he turned off the light. 'First night I was here he came wandering in at three in the morning. Trust me, you don't want to wake up and find him prowling around your room. Anyway…' he got into his bed, settled down under the covers then turned to look at Harry in the darkness; Harry could see his outline by the moonlight filtering in through the grimy window, 'what d'you reckon?'**

**Harry didn't need to ask what Ron meant.**

**'Well, they didn't tell us much we couldn't have guessed, did they?' he said, thinking of all that had been said downstairs. 'I mean, all they've really said is that the Order's trying to stop people joining Vol—'**

Fred and George drew in their breaths.

**There was a sharp intake of breath from Ron.**

**'—demort,' said Harry firmly. 'When are you going to start using his name? Sirius and Lupin do.'**

"Yeah, maybe we should start saying his name," mused George.

"Or you could call him Moldywart," suggested Peter. "I was trying to say his name, but switched the 'm' and 'v' and it came out as Moldywart."

The twins burst out laughing. "That's a good one!" exclaimed Fred. "I think we will call him that!"

**Ron ignored this last comment.**

**'Yeah, you're right,' he said, 'we already knew nearly everything they told us, from using the Extendable Ears. The only new bit was -'**

**Crack.  
'OUCH!'**

"You two just Apparated into their room, didn't you?" asked Sirius. The twins nodded.

**'Keep your voice down, Ron, or Mum'll be back up here.'  
'You two just Apparated on my knees!'**

**'Yeah, well, it's harder in the dark.'**

**Harry saw the blurred outlines of Fred and George leaping down from Ron's bed. There was a groan of bedsprings and Harry's mattress descended a few inches as George sat down near his feet.**

**'So, got there yet?' said George eagerly.**

**'The weapon Sirius mentioned?' said Harry.**

**'Let slip, more like,' said Fred with relish, now sitting next to Ron. 'We didn't hear about that on the old Extendables, did we?'**

"No, we didn't," said Fred. "It feels sort of weird reading, or rather hearing, about what we're saying and doing." George nodded in agreement.

**'What d'you reckon it is?' said Harry.**

**'Could be anything,' said Fred.**

**'But there can't be anything worse than the Avada Kedavra Curse, can there?' said Ron. What's worse than death?'**

"What did I suggest?" asked George. "Oh yeah, something that can kill loads of people at once."

**'Maybe it's something that can kill loads of people at once,' suggested George.**

Lily gave George a look. "Could you not do that? I'm going to read what you say anyway."

**'Maybe it's some particularly painful way of killing people,' said Ron fearfully.**

"There's the Cruciatus Curse," said James. "Moldywart doesn't need anything more than that."

**'He's got the Cruciatus Curse for causing pain,' said Harry, 'he doesn't need anything more efficient than that.'**

**There was a pause and Harry knew that the others, like him, were wondering what horrors this weapon could perpetrate.**

"It could be anything, really," said Peter, shuddering.

**'So who d'you think's got it now?' asked George.**

"Well, I for one hope it's on our side," said Remus. "We don't want Moldywart getting his hands on it."

**'I hope it's our side,' said Ron, sounding slightly nervous.**

**'If it is, Dumbledore's probably keeping it,' said Fred.**

**'Where?' said Ron quickly. 'Hogwarts?'**

**'Bet it is!' said George. 'That's where he hid the Philosopher's Stone.'**

**'A weapon's going to be a lot bigger than the Stone, though!' said Ron.**

"Not necessarily," said Lily. "Sometimes small things can be powerful. Dynamite's not all that big, but it can blast a hole in a mountain."

**'Not necessarily,' said Fred.**

**'Yeah, size is no guarantee of power,' said George. 'Look at Ginny.'**

"Huh?" the Marauders and Lily asked, looking at the twins.

"Trust me, you never want to be on the receiving end of one of her Bat-Bogey Hexes," said Fred.

**'What d'you mean?' said Harry.**

**'You've never been on the receiving end of one of her Bat-Bogey Hexes, have you?'**

**'Shhh!' said Fred, half-rising from the bed. 'Listen!'**

**They fell silent. Footsteps were coming up the stairs.**

"You mum's coming up, isn't she?" asked Remus. Fred and George nodded.

**'Mum,' said George and without further ado there was a loud crack and Harry felt the weight vanish from the end of his bed. A few seconds later, they heard the floorboard creak outside their door; Mrs. Weasley was plainly listening to check whether or not they were talking.**

**Hedwig and Pigwidgeon hooted dolefully. The floorboard creaked again and they heard her heading upstairs to check on Fred and George.**

"Sounds as if she doesn't trust you guys," commented Sirius.

**'She doesn't trust us at all, you know,' said Ron regretfully.**

**Harry was sure he would not be able to fall asleep; the evening had been so packed with things to think about that he fully expected to lie awake for hours mulling it all over. He wanted to continue talking to Ron, but Mrs. Weasley was now creaking back downstairs again, and once she had gone he distinctly heard others making their way upstairs… in fact, many-legged creatures were cantering softly up and down outside the bedroom door, and Hagrid the Care of Magical Creatures teacher was saying, 'Beauties, arm they, eh, Harry? We'll be studyin' weapons this term …' and Harry saw that the creatures had cannons for heads and were wheeling to face him… he ducked…**

"What?" asked Fred, frowning.

"I think Harry fell asleep and this is his dream," said James.

**The next thing he knew, he was curled into a warm ball under his bedclothes and George's loud voice was filling the room.**

**'Mum says get up, your breakfast is in the kitchen and then she needs you in the drawing room, there are loads more Doxys than she thought and she's found a nest of dead Puffskeins under the sofa.'**

"How many Doxys are there?" asked Remus, frowning. "And there's a nest of dead Puffskeins too?"

George remembered something. "Remember when you used Ron's Puffskein for bludger practice, Fred?" Fred nodded, remembering.

**Half an hour later Harry and Ron, who had dressed and breakfasted quickly, entered the drawing room, a long, high-ceilinged room on the first floor with olive green walls covered in dirty tapestries. The carpet exhaled little clouds of dust every time someone put their foot on it and the long, moss green velvet curtains were buzzing as though swarming with invisible bees. It was around these that Mrs. Weasley, Hermione, Ginny, Fred and George were grouped, all looking rather peculiar as they had each tied a cloth over their nose and mouth. Each of them was also holding a large bottle of black liquid with a nozzle at the end.**

"Ugh, I don't envy them," said Peter. "Having to sprat Doxys for the day."

**'Cover your faces and take a spray,' Mrs. Weasley said to Harry and Ron the moment she saw them, pointing to two more bottles of black liquid standing on a spindle-legged table. 'It's Doxycide. I've never seen an infestation this bad-what that house-elf's been doing for the last ten years -'**

**Hermione's face was half concealed by a tea towel but Harry distinctly saw her throw a reproachful look at Mrs. Weasley.**

**'Kreacher's really old, he probably couldn't manage-'**

"Yeah right," muttered James.

"Kreacher's trying to sneak stuff into his room so we couldn't throw them out," said Fred.

**'You'd be surprised what Kreacher can manage when he wants to, Hermione,' said Sirius, who had just entered the room carrying a bloodstained bag of what appeared to be dead rats. 'I've just been feeding Buckbeak,' he added, in reply to Harry's enquiring look. 'I keep him upstairs in my mothers bedroom. Anyway… this writing desk…'**

**He dropped the bag of rats into an armchair, then bent over to examine the locked cabinet which, Harry now noticed for the first time, was shaking slightly.**

**'Well, Molly, I'm pretty sure this is a Boggart,' said Sirius, peering through the keyhole, 'but perhaps we ought to let Mad-Eye have a shifty at it before we let it out'knowing my mother, it could be something much worse.'**

"I wouldn't be surprised," said Sirius.

"Well, it did turn out to be a broggart," said George. "I won't say any more, though."

**'Right you are, Sirius,' said Mrs. Weasley.**

**They were both speaking in carefully light, polite voices that told Harry quite plainly that neither had forgotten their disagreement of the night before.**

**A loud, clanging bell sounded from downstairs, followed at once by the cacophony of screams and wails that had been triggered the previous night by Tonks knocking over the umbrella stand.**

"They're not supposed to ring the bell!" exclaimed Sirius. "it'll just set off my mum's portrait again!"

**'I keep telling them not to ring the doorbell!' said Sirius exasperatedly, hurrying out of the room. They heard him thundering down the stairs as Mrs. Black's screeches echoed up through the house once more: ****'Stains, of dishonour, filthy half-breeds, blood traitors, children of filth-!'**

"This is getting annoying," muttered Lily.

**'Close the door, please, Harry,' said Mrs. Weasley.**

**Harry took as much time as he dared to close the drawing-room door; he wanted to listen to what was going on downstairs. Sirius had obviously managed to shut the curtains over his mother's portrait because she had stopped screaming. He heard Sirius walking down the hall, then the clattering of the chain on the front door, and then a deep voice he recognised as Kingsley Shacklebolt's saying, 'Hestia's just relieved me, so she's got Moody's Cloak now, thought I'd leave a report for Dumbledore…'**

Fred and George decided to stop listening for a few minutes, and began whispering to each other, planning pranks to do against Sirius and James.

**Feeling Mrs. Weasley's eyes on the back of his head, Harry regretfully closed the drawing room door and rejoined the Doxy party.**

**Mrs. Weasley was bending over to check the page on Doxys in _Gilderoy Lockhart's Guide to Household Pests_, which was lying open on the sofa.**

"Why is she consulting that book?" asked Remus. "Didn't Ron tell her that Lockhart's a fraud?"

"Well, the book has to be accurate," said James. "Even though Lockhart never did any of the stuff, other people did."

**'Right, you lot, you need to be careful, because Doxys bite and their teeth are poisonous. I've got a bottle of antidote here, but I'd rather nobody needed it.'**

**She straightened up, positioned herself squarely in front of the curtains and beckoned them all forward.**

**'When I say the word, start spraying immediately,' she said. 'They'll come flying out at us, I expect, but it says on the sprays one good squirt will paralyse them. When they're immobilised, just throw them in this bucket.'**

"Well, at least it shouldn't be too difficult," commented Peter.

**She stepped carefully out of their line of fire, and raised her own spray.**

**'All right - squirt!'**

**Harry had been spraying only a few seconds when a fully-grown Doxy came soaring out of a fold in the material, shiny beetle-like wings whirring, tiny needle-sharp teeth bared, its fairy-like body covered with thick black hair and its four tiny lists clenched with fury. Harry caught it full in the face with a blast of Doxycide. It froze in midair and fell, with a surprisingly loud thunk, on to the worn carpet below. Harry picked it up and threw it in the bucket.**

"Great shot, Harry!" exclaimed James.

**'Fred, what are you doing?' said Mrs. Weasley sharply. 'Spray that at once and throw it away!'**

**Harry looked round. Fred was holding a struggling Doxy between his forefinger and thumb.**

**'Right-o,' Fred said brightly, spraying the Doxy quickly in the face so that it fainted, but the moment Mrs. Weasley's back was turned he pocketed it with a wink.**

"Why did you want the doxy?" asked Sirius.

Fred looked up. "Oh, to experiment with Doxy venom for our Skiving Snackboxes."

**'We want to experiment with Doxy venom for our Skiving Snackboxes,' George told Harry under his breath.**

**Deftly spraying two Doxys at once as they soared straight for his nose, Harry moved closer to George and muttered out of the corner of his mouth, 'What are Skiving Snackboxes?'**

**'Range of sweets to make you ill,' George whispered, keeping a wary eye on Mrs. Weasley's back. 'Not seriously ill, mind, just ill enough to get you out of a class when you feel like it. Fred and I have been developing them this summer. They're double-ended, colour-coded chews. If you eat the orange half of the Puking Pastilles, you throw up. Moment you've been rushed out of the lesson for the hospital wing, you swallow the purple half-'**

"And that will restore you back to full health, right?" asked Remus. George nodded.

**"-'which restores you to full fitness, enabling you to pursue the leisure activity of your own choice during an hour that would otherwise have been devoted to unproftable boredom.' That's what we're putting in the adverts, anyway," whispered Fred, who had edged over out of Mrs. Weasley's line of vision and was now sweeping a few stray Doxys from the floor and adding them to his pocket. 'But they still need a bit of work. At the moment our testers are having a bit of trouble stopping themselves puking long enough to swallow the purple end.'**

"Testers?" asked Lily. "Who are they?"

"Well, us," said Fred. "It's not like we can get anyone else."

**'Testers?'**

**'Us,' said Fred. 'We take it in turns. George did the Fainting Fancies - we both tried the Nosebleed Nougat -'**

**'Mum thought we'd been duelling,' said George.**

**'Joke shop still on, then?' Harry muttered, pretending to be adjusting the nozzle on his spray.**

"Of course," said George, grinning. "We're in the process of getting premises. But currently it's just a mail-order service."

**'Well, we haven't had a chance to get premises yet,' said Fred, dropping his voice even lower as Mrs. Weasley mopped her brow with her scarf before returning to the attack, 'so we're running it as a mail-order service at the moment. We put advertisements in the Daily Prophet last week.'**

**'All thanks to you, mate,' said George. 'But don't worry… Mum hasn't got a clue. She won't read the Daily Prophet any more, 'cause of it telling lies about you and Dumbledore.'**

"Well, that's good," said Peter.

**Harry grinned. He had forced the Weasley twins to take the thousand Galleons prize money he had won in the Triwizard Tournament to help them realise their ambition to open a joke shop, but he was still glad to know that his part in furthering their plans was unknown to Mrs. Weasley. She did not think running a joke shop was a suitable career for two of her sons.**

"But it's obvious you guys'll succeed in it," said James. "So your mum should let you pursue it." The twins grinned broadly.

**The de-Doxying of the curtains took most of the morning. It was past midday when Mrs. Weasley finally removed her protective scarf, sank into a sagging armchair and sprang up again with a cry of disgust, having sat on the bag of dead rats. **

They all began laughing.

**The curtains were no longer buzzing; they hung limp and damp from the intensive spraying. At the foot of them unconscious Doxys lay crammed in the bucket beside a bowl of their black eggs, at which Crookshanks was now sniffing and Fred and George were shooting covetous looks.**

**'I think we'll tackle those after lunch.' Mrs. Weasley pointed at the dusty glass-fronted cabinets standing on either side of the mantelpiece. **

"They'll be full of Dark Art stuff," said Sirius.

**They were crammed with an odd assortment of objects: a selection of rusty daggers, claws, a coiled snakeskin, a number of tarnished silver boxes inscribed with languages Harry could not understand and, least pleasant of all, an ornate crystal bottle with a large opal set into the stopper, full of what Harry was quite sure was blood.**

"I think it's dragon blood, though, not human blood or something," said Sirius.

**The clanging doorbell rang again. Everyone looked at Mrs. Weasley.**

**'Stay here,' she said firmly, snatching up the bag of rats as Mrs. Black's screeches started up again from down below. 'I'll bring up some sandwiches.'**

**She left the room, closing the door carefully behind her. At once, everyone dashed over to the window to look down on the doorstep. They could see the top of an unkempt gingery head and a stack of precariously balanced cauldrons.**

**'Mundungus!' said Hermione. 'What's he brought all those cauldrons for?'**

"Probably looking for a place to keep them," muttered Lily blackly. "I mean, he was buying stolen cauldrons the night he was supposed to be guarding Harry."

**'Probably looking for a sale place to keep them,' said Harry. 'Isn't that what he was doing the night he was supposed to be tailing me? Picking up dodgy cauldrons?'**

**'Yeah, you're right!' said Fred, as the front door opened; Mundungus heaved his cauldrons through it and disappeared from view. 'Blimey, Mum won't like that…'**

"That's an understatement," said Remus.

**He and George crossed to the door and stood beside it, listening closely. Mrs Black's screaming had stopped.**

**'Mundungus is talking to Sirius and Kingsley,' Fred muttered, frowning with concentration. 'Can't hear properly… d'you reckon we can risk the Extendable Ears?'**

**'Might be worth it,' said George. 'I could sneak upstairs and get a pair-'**

"I don't think you'll need it," said Peter. "Your mum's going to start shouting soon, isn't she?" The twins nodded.

**But at that precise moment there was an explosion of sound from downstairs that rendered Extendable Ears quite unnecessary. All of them could hear exactly what Mrs. Weasley was shouting at the top of her voice.**

**'WE ARE NOT RUNNING A HIDEOUT FOR STOLEN GOODS!'**

**'I love hearing Mum shouting at someone else,' said Fred, with a satisfied smile on his face as he opened the door an inch or so to allow Mrs. Weasley's voice to permeate the room better, 'it makes such a nice change.'**

"Yeah," said George. "It does make a nice change."

**'- COMPLETELY IRRESPONSIBLE, AS IF WE HAVEN'T GOT ENOUGH TO WORRY ABOUT WITHOUT YOU DRAGGING STOLEN CAULDRONS INTO THE HOUSE -'**

**'The idiots are letting her get into her stride,' said George, shaking his head. 'You've got to head her off early otherwise she builds up a head of steam and goes on for hours. And she's been dying to have a go at Mundungus ever since he sneaked off when he was supposed to be following you, Harry - and there goes Sirius's mum again.'**

They began chuckling over it.

**Mrs. Weasley's voice was lost amid fresh shrieks and screams from the portraits in the hall.**

**George made to shut the door to drown the noise, but before he could do so, a house-elf edged into the room.**

"Kreacher!" spat Sirius.

**Except for the filthy rag tied like a loincloth around its middle, it was completely naked. It looked very old. Its skin seemed to be several times too big for it and, though it was bald like all house-elves, there was a quantity of white hair growing out of its large, batlike ears. Its eyes were a bloodshot and watery grey and its fleshy nose was large and rather snoutlike.**

"Yep, it's Kreacher," muttered Sirius. "Only he's like twenty years older."

**The elf took absolutely no notice of Harry and the rest. Acting as though it could not see them, it shuffled hunchbacked, slowly and doggedly, towards the far end of the room, all the while muttering under its breath in a hoarse, deep voice like a bullfrogs.**

**'… smells like a drain and a criminal to boot, but she's no better, nasty old blood traitor with her brats messing up my mistress's house, oh, my poor mistress, if she knew, if she knew the scum they've let into her house, what would she say to old Kreacher, oh, the shame of it, Mudbloods and werewolves and traitors and thieves, poor old Kreacher, what can he do…'**

"He sounds horrible!" exclaimed Lily. "No wonder you don't like him, Sirius."

**'Hello, Kreacher,' said Fred very loudly, closing the door with a snap.**

**The house-elf froze in his tracks, stopped muttering, and gave a very pronounced and very unconvincing start of surprise.**

**'Kreacher did not see young master,' he said, turning around and bowing to Fred. Still facing the carpet, he added, perfectly audibly, 'Nasty little brat of a blood traitor it is.'**

"How dare he!" exclaimed James. "The Weasleys are one of the best wizarding families!"

**'Sorry?' said George. 'Didn't catch that last bit.'**

**'Kreacher said nothing,' said the elf, with a second bow to George, adding in a clear undertone, 'and there's its twin, unnatural little beasts they are.'**

"You're the unnatural little beast!' snapped Sirius.

**Harry didn't know whether to laugh or not. The elf straightened up, eyeing them all malevolently, and apparently convinced that they could not hear him as he continued to mutter.**

**'… and there's the Mudblood, standing there bold as brass, oh, if my mistress knew, oh, how she'd cry, and there's a new boy, Kreacher doesn't know his name. What is he doing here? Kreacher doesn't know…'**

**'This is Harry, Kreacher,' said Herrmone tentatively. 'Harry Potter.'**

**Kreacher's pale eyes widened and he muttered faster and more furiously than ever.**

**'The Mudblood is talking to Kreacher as though she is my friend, if Kreacher's mistress saw him in such company, oh, what would she say-'**

"Don't call Hermione the 'm' word!" exclaimed Remus angrily.

**'Don't call her a Mudblood!' said Ron and Ginny together, very angrily.**

**'It doesn't matter,' Hermione whispered, 'he's not in his right mind, he doesn't know what he's-'**

"Oh really?" inquired Sirius angrily. "Kreacher may be insane, but he knows exactly what he's saying!"

**'Don't kid yourself, Hermione, he knows exactly what he's saying,' said Fred, eyeing Kreacher with great dislike.**

**Kreacher was still muttering, his eyes on Harry.**

**'Is it true? Is it Harry Potter? Kreacher can see the scar, it must be true, that's the boy who stopped the Dark Lord, Kreacher wonders how he did it-'**

"Shut up, Kreacher," said Lily flatly.

**'Don't we all, Kreacher,' said Fred.**

**'What do you want, anyway?' George asked.**

**Kreacher's huge eyes darted towards George.**

**'Kreacher is cleaning,' he said evasively.**

"A likely story," commented Sirius.

**'A likely story,' said a voice behind Harry.**

**Sirius had come back; he was glowering at the elf from the doorway. **

"I figured I'd say something like that," said Sirius.

**The noise in the hall had abated; perhaps Mrs. Weasley and Mundungus had moved their argument down into the kitchen.**

**At the sight of Sirius, Kreacher flung himself into a ridiculously low bow that flattened his snoutltke nose on the floor.**

**'Stand up straight,' said Sirius impatiently. 'Now, what are you up to?'**

**'Kreacher is cleaning,' the elf repeated. 'Kreacher lives to serve the Noble House of Black -'**

**'And it's getting blacker every day, it's filthy,' said Sirius.**

**'Master always liked his little joke,' said Kreacher, bowing again, and continuing in an undertone, 'Master was a nasty ungrateful swine who broke his mother's heart -'**

"My mother doesn't have a heart!" snapped Sirius. "She's only keeping herself alive out of spite."

**'My mother didn't have a heart, Kreacher,' snapped Sirius. 'She kept herself alive out of pure spite.'**

**Kreacher bowed again as he spoke.**

**'Whatever Master says,' he muttered furiously. 'Master is not fit to wipe slime from his mother's boots, oh, my poor mistress, what would she say if she saw Kreacher serving him, how she hated him, what a disappointment he was-'**

"Oh, please shut up," said Peter. "Kreacher is so annoying."

**'I asked you what you were up to,' said Sirius coldly. 'Every time you show up pretending to be cleaning, you sneak something off to your room so we can't throw it out.'**

**'Kreacher would never move anything from its proper place in Master's house,' said the elf, then muttered very fast, 'Mistress would never forgive Kreacher if the tapestry was thrown out, seven centuries it's been in the family, Kreacher must save it, Kreacher will not let Master and the blood traitors and the brats destroy it-'**

"Oh that," said Sirius. "I wouldn't put it past Mother to have put a Permanent Sticking Charm on the back of it."

**'I thought it might be that,' said Sirius, casting a disdainful look at the opposite wall. 'She'll have put another Permanent Sticking Charm on the back of it, I don't doubt, but if I can get rid of it I certainly will. Now go away, Kreacher.'**

**It seemed that Kreacher did not dare disobey a direct order; nevertheless, the look he gave Sirius as he shuffled out past him was full of deepest loathing and he muttered all the way out of the room.**

"Oh, that house elf!" raged Lily. "I'm actually tempted to strangle him!"

**'- comes back from Azkaban ordering Kreacher around, oh, my poor mistress, what would she say if she saw the house now, scum living in it, her treasures thrown out, she swore he was no son of hers and he's back, they say he's a murderer too-'**

**'Keep muttering and I will be a murderer!' said Sirius irritably as he slammed the door shut on the elf.**

**'Sirius, he's not right in the head,' Hermione pleaded, 'I don't think he realises we can hear him.'**

**'He's been alone too long,' said Sirius, 'taking mad orders from my mother's portrait and talking to himself, but he was always a foul little-'**

"Yeah," said James. "Kreacher really is a foul little-" He broke off, as what he wanted to say would no doubt irk Lily.

**'If you could just set him free,' said Hermione hopefully, 'maybe-'**

"Well, Kreacher can't be set free, as he knows too much about the Order," said Remus.

**'We can't set him free, he knows too much about the Order,' said Sirius curtly. 'And anyway, the shock would kill him. You suggest to him that he leaves this house, see how he takes it.'**

**Sirius walked across the room to where the tapestry Kreacher had been trying to protect hung the length of the wall. Harry and the others followed.**

**The tapestry looked immensely old; it was faded and looked as though Doxys had gnawed it in places. Nevertheless, the golden thread with which it was embroidered still glinted brightly enough to show them a sprawling family tree dating back(as far as Harry could tell) to the Middle Ages. Large words at the very top of the tapestry read:**

_**The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black Toujours pur**_

Sirius snorted. "It's not all that pure. They just blast anyone off that doesn't fit in with the family. There's probably a few Blacks around that aren't being acknowledged. You know, because of Marius Black and Phineas Black. Marius was blasted off because he was a Squib, and Phineas, son of Phineas Nigellus Black, got removed for supporting Muggle rights."

**'You're not on here!' said Harry, after scanning the bottom of the tree closely.**

**'I used to be there,' said Sirius, pointing at a small, round, charred hole in the tapestry, rather like a cigarette burn. 'My sweet old mother blasted me off after I ran away from home-Kreacher's quite fond of muttering the story under his breath.'**

**'You ran away from home?'**

"Yeah," said Sirius. "I ran away to James' house this past summer."

**'When I was about sixteen,' said Sirius. 'I'd had enough.'**

**'Where did you go?' asked Harry, staring at him.**

**'Your dad's place,' said Sirius. 'Your grandparents were really good about it; they sort of adopted me as a second son. Yeah, I camped out at your dad's in the school holidays, and when I was seventeen I got a place of my own. My Uncle Alphard had left me a decent bit of gold - he's been wiped off here, too, that's probably why - anyway, after that I looked after myself. I was always welcome at Mr. and Mrs. Potter's for Sunday lunch, though.'**

**'But… why did you… ?'**

"I left because I couldn't stand my family any longer," snapped Sirius.

**'Leave?' Sirius smiled bitterly and ran his fingers through his long, unkempt hair. 'Because I hated the whole lot of them: my parents, with their pure-blood mania, convinced that to be a Black made you practically royal… my idiot brother, soft enough to believe them… that's him.'**

**Sirius jabbed a finger at the very bottom of the tree, at the name 'Regulus Black'. A date of death (some fifteen years previously) followed the date of birth.**

**'He was younger than me,' said Sirius, 'and a much better son, as I was constantly reminded.'**

**'But he died,' said Harry.**

**'Yeah,' said Sirius. 'Stupid idiot… he joined the Death Eaters.'**

"Why am I not surprised?" asked Sirius. "Regulus and I got along well enough when we were kids, but after I started Hogwarts, we drifted apart and he listened to everything our parents said."

**'You're kidding!'**

**'Come on, Harry, haven't you seen enough of this house to tell what kind of wizards my family were?' said Sirius testily.**

**'Were - were your parents Death Eaters as well?'**

**'No, no, but believe me, they thought Voldemort had the right idea, they were all for the purification of the wizarding race, getting rid of Muggleborns and having purebloods in charge. They weren't alone, either, there were quite a few people, before Voldemort showed his true colours, who thought he had the right idea about things… they got cold feet when they saw what he was prepared to do to get power, though. But I bet my parents thought Regulus was a right little hero for joining up at first.'**

They all made a face.

**'Was he killed by an Auror?' Harry asked tentatively.**

**'Oh, no,' said Sirius. 'No, he was murdered by Voldemort. Or on Voldemort's orders, more likely; I doubt Regulus was ever important enough to be killed by Voldemort in person. From what I found out after he died, he got in so far, then panicked about what he was being asked to do and tried to back out. Well, you don't just hand in your resignation to Voldemort. It's a lifetime of service or death.'**

"Idiot," muttered Sirius.

**'Lunch,' said Mrs. Weasley's voice.**

**She was holding her wand high in front of her, balancing a huge tray loaded with sandwiches and cake on its tip. She was very red in the face and still looked angry. The others moved over to her, eager for some food, but Harry remained with Sirius, who had bent closer to the tapestry.**

**'I haven't looked at this for years. There's Phineas Nigellus… my great-great-grandfather, see?… least popular Headmaster Hogwarts ever had… and Araminta Meliflua… cousin of my mothers… tried to force through a Ministry Bill to make Muggle-hunting legal… and dear Aunt Elladora… she started the family tradition of beheading house-elves when they got too old to carry tea trays… of course, any time the family produced someone halfway decent they were disowned. **

"Yeah," muttered Sirius. "Like with Phineas and Isla and Cedrella and Andromeda. Isla got disowned for marrying a Muggle, and Cedrella for marrying a Weasley."

**I see Tonks isn't on here. Maybe that's why Kreacher won't take orders from her-he's supposed to do whatever anyone in the family asks him-'**

**'You and Tonks are related?' Harry asked, surprised.**

"Well, yeah," said Sirius. "Her mother Andromeda is my favorite cousin. I secretly attended her wedding with Ted Tonks. Mother found out about it, though, and I got locked in my room for two weeks."

**'Oh, yeah, her mother Andromeda was my favourite cousin,' said Sirius, examining the tapestry closely. 'No, Andromeda's not on here either, look-'**

**He pointed to another small round burn mark between two names, Bellatrix and Narcissa.**

**'Andromeda's sisters are still here because they made lovely, respectable pureblood marriages, but Andromeda married a Muggleborn, Ted Tonks, so-'**

**Sirius mimed blasting the tapestry with a wand and laughed sourly. Harry, however, did not laugh; he was too busy staring at the names to the right of Andromeda's burn mark. A double line of gold embroidery linked Narcissa Black with Lucius Malfoy and a single vertical gold line from their names led to the name Draco.**

**'You're related to the Malfoys!'**

"That's because all the pureblood families are related," said James. "I'm related to Sirius because my mother was a Black. She's the only decent Black that hasn't got disowned."

"Well, she did marry into a pureblood family that's considered respectable by wizarding society," pointed out Remus.

**The pureblood families are all interrelated,' said Sirius. 'If you're only going to let your sons and daughters marry purebloods your choice is very limited; there are hardly any of us left. Molly and I are cousins by marriage and Arthur's something like my second cousin once removed. But there's no point looking for them on here - if ever a family was a bunch of blood traitors it's the Weasleys.'**

**But Harry was now looking at the name to the left of Andromeda's burn: Bellatrix Black, which was connected by a double line to Rodolphus Lestrange.**

**'Lestrange…' Harry said aloud. The name had stirred something in his memory; he knew it from somewhere, but for a moment he couldn't think where, though it gave him an odd, creeping sensation in the pit of his stomach.**

**'They're in Azkaban,' said Sirius shortly.**

"So that means they were the ones that tortured the Longbottoms, right?" asked Lily.

Remus nodded, and when he saw the twins look puzzled, explained, "The Lestranges were arrested for torturing Neville's parents into insanity because they thought the Longbottoms might have some idea as to Moldywart's whereabouts."

**Harry looked at him curiously.**

**'Bellatrix and her husband Rodolphus came in with Barty Crouch junior,' said Sirius, in the same brusque voice. 'Rodolphus's brother Rabastan was with them, too.'**

**Then Harry remembered. He had seen Bellatrix Lestrange inside Dumbledore's Pensieve, the strange device in which thoughts and memories could be stored: a tall dark woman with heavy-lidded eyes, who had stood at her trial and proclaimed her continuing allegiance to Lord Voldemort, her pride that she had tried to find him after his downfall and her conviction that she would one day be rewarded for her loyaty.**

"I hate her," said Sirius. "She's my least favorite cousin. Narcissa's more bearable than her."

**'You never said she was your-'**

**'Does it matter if she's my cousin?' snapped Sirius. 'As far as I'm concerned, they're not my family. She's certainly not my family. I haven't seen her since I was your age, unless you count a glimpse of her coming into Azkaban. D'you think I'm proud of having a relative like her?'**

**'Sorry,' said Harry quickly, 'I didn't mean-I was just surprised, that's all-'**

**'It doesn't matter, don't apologise,' Sirius mumbled. He turned away from the tapestry, his hands deep in his pockets. 'I don't like being back here,' he said, staring across the drawing room. 'I never thought I'd be stuck in this house again.'**

"Poor Sirius," said Peter. Sirius smiled wryly.

**Harry understood completely. He knew how he would feel, when he was grown up and thought he was free of the place for ever, to return and live at number four, Privet Drive.**

**'It's ideal for Headquarters, of course,' Sirius said. 'My father put every security measure known to wizardkind on it when he lived here. It's unplottable, so Muggles could never come and call-as if they'd ever have wanted to- and now Dumbledore's added his protection, you'd be hard put to find a safer house anywhere. Dumbledore is Secret Keeper for the Order, you know - nobody can find Headquarters unless he tells them personally where it is - that note Moody showed you last night, that was from Dumbledore…' **

"Well that means the location fo the Order is safe," said James.

**Sirius gave a short, bark-like laugh. 'If my parents could see the use their house was being put to now… well, my mother's portrait should give you some idea'**

**He scowled for a moment, then sighed.**

**'I wouldn't mind if I could just get out occasionally and do something useful. I've asked Dumbledore whether I can escort you to your hearing-as Snuffles, obviously-so I can give you a bit of moral support, what d'you think?'**

"I don't think Dumbledore would let you do that," said Remus.

"He didn't," said Fred.

**Harry felt as though his stomach had sunk through the dusty carpet. He had not thought about the hearing once since dinner the previous evening; in the excitement of being back with the people he liked best, and hearing everything that was going on, it had completely flown his mind. At Sirius's words, however, the crushing sense of dread returned to him. He stared at Hermione and the Weasleys, all tucking into their sandwiches, and thought how he would feel if they went back to Hogwarts without him.**

"You can always stay at Grimmauld Place with me!" exclaimed Sirius.

**'Don't worry,' Sirius said. Harry looked up and realised that Sirius had been watching him. 'I'm sure they'll clear you, there's definitely something in the International Statute of Secrecy about being allowed to use magic to save your own life.'**

"Yeah," said James. "Oh, does Harry get cleared, Fred and George?"

Fred opened his mouth to answer when a second slip of parchment appeared. He picked it up and read, "No, you are not going to reveal if Harry is found innocent, or I will send you back to your own time, Fredrick Weasley. And James Potter, please use your mind. You still have many chapters to read, so you should be able to figure out on your own if Harry will get off even before you read about his hearing. Lily, please continue reading. Yours truly, Perdita."

James frowned when Fred was done. "So I guess Harry does get off. Otherwise there wouldn't be so many chapters left to read." Lily gave him a look, then resumed reading.

**'But if they do expel me,' said Harry quietly, 'can I come back here and live with you?'**

**Sirius smiled sadly. 'We'll see.'**

**"I'd feel a lot better about the hearing if I knew I didn't have to go back to the Dursleys'," Harry pressed him.**

**'They must be bad if you prefer this place,' said Sirius gloomily.**

"They are," muttered Lily.

**'Hurry up, you two, or there won't be any food left,' Mrs. Weasley called.**

**Sirius heaved another great sigh, cast a dark look at the tapestry, then he and Harry went to join the others.**

**Harry tried his best not to think about the hearing while they emptied the glass-fronted cabinets that afternoon. Fortunately for him, it was a job that required a lot of concentration, as many of the objects in there seemed very reluctant to leave their dusty shelves. Sirius sustained a bad bite from a silver snuffbox; within seconds his bitten hand had developed an unpleasant crusty covering like a tough brown glove.**

Remus looked over Lily's shoulder and reread the last sentence. "I think the snuffbox has Wartcap powder in it. The effects sound like the effects of Wartcap powder."

**'It's OK,' he said, examining the hand with interest before tapping it lightly with his wand and restoring its skin to normal, 'must be Wartcap powder in there.'**

**He threw the box aside into the sack where they were depositing the debris from the cabinets; Harry saw George wrap his own hand carefully in a cloth moments later and sneak the box into his already Doxy-filled pocket.**

The Marauders chuckled. "More stuff to test for your Skiving Snackboxes?" asked Sirius. The twins nodded.

**They found an unpleasant-looking silver instrument, something like a many-legged pair of tweezers, which scuttled up Harry's arm like a spider when he picked it up, and attempted to puncture his skin. Sirius seized it and smashed it with a heavy book entitled _Nature's Nobility: A Wizarding Genealogy_. **

"Thank Merlin," said Lily. "If you hadn't seized and smashed it, Merlins knows the effect on Harry if it had actually punctured his skin."

**There was a musical box that emitted a faintly sinister, tinkling tune when wound, and they all found themselves becoming curiously weak and sleepy, until Ginny had the sense to slam the lid shut; a heavy locket that none of them could open; a number of ancient seals; and, in a dusty box, an Order of Merlin, First Class, that had been awarded to Sirius's grandfather for 'services to the Ministry'.**

"It just means he gave them a load of gold," said Sirius contemptuously. "I wouldn't brag about it."

**'It means he gave them a load of gold,' said Sirius contemptuously, throwing the medal into the rubbish sack.**

"Even the future me says so!" exclaimed Sirius.

**Several times Kreacher sidled into the room and attempted to smuggle things away under his loincloth, muttering horrible curses every time they caught him at it. When Sirius wrested a large golden ring bearing the Black crest from his grip, Kreacher actually burst into furious tears and left the room sobbing under his breath and calling Sirius names Harry had never heard before.**

**'It was my father's,' said Sirius, throwing the ring into the sack. 'Kreacher wasn't quite as devoted to him as to my mother, but I still caught him snogging a pair of my father's old trousers last week.'**

They all snorted at the image.

**Mrs. Weasley kept them all working very hard over the next few days. The drawing room took three days to decontaminate. Finally, the only undesirable things left in it were the tapestry of the Black family tree, which resisted all their attempts to remove it from the wall, **

"Couldn't you just burn it?" asked Peter. "I think that might work."

Fred and George looked at him. "Yeah, it could work," said George.

"We'll suggest it," added Fred.

**and the rattling writing desk. Moody had not dropped by Headquarters yet, so they could not be sure what was inside it.**

**They moved from the drawing room to a dining room on the ground floor where they found spiders as large as saucers lurking in the dresser (Ron left the room hurriedly to make a cup of tea and did not return for an hour and a half). **

"Well, Ron is afraid of spiders," said Remus.

**The china, which bore the Black crest and motto, was all thrown unceremoniously into a sack by Sirius, and the same fate met a set of old photographs in tarnished silver frames, all of whose occupants squealed shrilly as the glass covering them smashed.**

**Snape might refer to their work as 'cleaning', but in Harry's opinion they were really waging war on the house, which was putting up a very good fight, aided and abetted by Kreacher. The house-elf kept appearing wherever they were congregated, his muttering becoming more and more offensive as he attempted to remove anything he could from the rubbish sacks. Sirius went as far as to threaten him with clothes, but Kreacher fixed him with a watery stare and said, 'Master must do as Master wishes,' before turning away and muttering very loudly, 'but Master will not turn Kreacher away, no, because Kreacher knows what they are up to, oh yes, he is plotting against the Dark Lord, yes, with these Mudbloods and traitors and scum…'**

"No wonder why you hate Kreacher," said Lily. "He really is the most foul being I've ever met. Or read of, anyway."

**At which Sirius, ignoring Hermione's protests, seized Kreacher by the back of his loincloth and threw him bodily from the room.**

**The doorbell rang several times a day, which was the cue for Sirius's mother to start shrieking again, and for Harry and the others to attempt to eavesdrop on the visitor, though they gleaned very little from the brief glimpses and snatches of conversation they were able to sneak before Mrs. Weasley recalled them to their tasks. Snape flitted in and out of the house several times more, though to Harry's relief they never came face to face; **

"Thank Merlin," muttered James.

**Harry also caught sight of his Transfiguration teacher Professor McGonagall, looking very odd in a Muggle dress and coat, **

"I wish we could have seen McGonagall dressed like that," said Sirius.

**and she also seemed too busy to linger. Sometimes, however, the visitors stayed to help. Tonks joined them for a memorable afternoon in which they found a murderous old ghoul lurking in an upstairs toilet, **

"Ugh, that's horrible," said Peter, shuddering.

**and Lupin, who was staying in the house with Sirius but who left it for long periods to do mysterious work for the Order, helped them repair a grandfather clock that had developed the unpleasant habit of shooting heavy bolts at passers-by. **

"That clock has never done that before," said Sirius. "I guess after several years with nobody but Kreacher in the house, it started doing that."

**Mundungus redeemed himself slightly in Mrs. Weasley's eyes by rescuing Ron from an ancient set of purple robes that had tried to strangle him when he removed them from their wardrobe.**

**Despite the fact that he was still sleeping badly, still having dreams about corridors and locked doors that made his scar prickle, Harry was managing to have fun for the first time all summer. **

"How can cleaning house be fun?" demanded Fred.

"Well, Harry is away from the Dursleys," pointed out Lily. "And he is with his friends and Sirius."

**As long as he was busy he was happy; when the action abated, however, whenever he dropped his guard, or lay exhausted in bed watching blurred shadows move across the ceiling, the thought of the looming Ministry hearing returned to him. Fear jabbed at his insides like needles as he wondered what was going to happen to him if he was expelled. The idea was so terrible that he did not dare voice it aloud, not even to Ron and Hermione, who, though he often saw them whispering together and casting anxious looks in his direction, followed his lead in not mentioning it. **

"They're good friends," said Remus.

**Sometimes, he could not prevent his imagination showing him a faceless Ministry official who was snapping his wand in two and ordering him back to the Dursleys'… but he would not go. He was determined on that. He would come back here to Grimmauld Place and live with Sirius.**

"And I'll welcome you with open arms," said Sirius.

**He felt as though a brick had dropped into his stomach when Mrs. Weasley turned to him during dinner on Wednesday evening and sad quietly, 'I've ironed your best clothes for tomorrow morning, Harry, and I want you to wash your hair tonight, too. A good first impression can work wonders.'**

"The hearing's the next day?" gasped Lily. "Oh, this is so nerve-wracking, even if we do know that Harry must have gotten off, or the books wouldn't be so thick."

**Ron, Hermione, Fred, George and Ginny all stopped talking and looked over at him. Harry nodded and tried to keep eating his chop, but his mouth had become so dry he could not chew.**

"I wouldn't be able to eat either," said James.

**'How am I getting there?' he asked Mrs. Weasley, trying to sound unconcerned.**

**'Arthur's taking you to work with him,' said Mrs. Weasley gently.**

**Mr. Weasley smiled encouragingly at Harry across the table. ****'You can wait in my office until it's time for the hearing,' he said.**

"Well, Arthur can give Harry some advice on how to act during the hearing," said Remus. " I wonder who's the Head of Magical Law Enforcement. He or she would probably be running the hearing."

**Harry looked over at Sirius, but before he could ask the question, Mrs. Weasley had answered it.**

**'Professor Dumbledore doesn't think it's a good idea for Sirius to go with you, and I must say I -'**

"She probably thinks Dumbledore is right," muttered Sirius. "Why am I not surprised? I didn't think I'd be allowed to become Padfoot and go to the hearing to give moral support."

**'- think he's quite right,' said Sirius through clenched teeth.**

**Mrs. Weasley pursed her lips.**

**'When did Dumbledore tell you that?' Harry said, staring at Sirius.**

**'He came last night, when you were in bed,' said Mr. Weasley.**

"_What_?" demanded James. "Dumbledore came the night before and didn't even ask to see Harry?"

"Well, Harry was in bed at the time," pointed out Lily. "Molly must have told Dumbledore that and he decided to not bother Harry."

**Sirius stabbed moodily at a potato with his fork. Harry lowered his own eyes to his plate. The thought that Dumbledore had been in the house on the eve of his hearing and not asked to see him made him feel, if it were possible, even worse.**

"Poor Harry," said Remus. "I guess Dumbledore should have asked to see Harry, even if he was in bed."

As the chapter was over, the prank war resumed.


	7. The Ministry of Magic

Author's Note: Thanks to podge17, Pinksakurablossom, Ze Ultimate Fanfic Writer, ProperT, and EndearinglyEccentric for their suggestions concerning the prank war. A huge bar of virtual chocolate and a basket of virtual cookies goes to each of you. Sorry about the long time to update. Real life gets in the way, like exams. I will try to have the next chapter up in less time than it took for this chapter, but it might not happen.

The prank war resumed. First Fred and George hit Sirius and James with a Hair-Lengthening Charm, which made their hair grow all the way to their feet before they were able to stop the charm. In return, Sirius and James did a charm that caused identical long white beards to sprout on the twins' faces, like it had when they tried to enter their names in the Goblet of Fire.

The twins in turn had the room provide a Shrinking Solution, which they forced the Marauders to drink, thereby turning them small. Then they remembered something they had seen in a Muggle ad and did a transfiguration that made the Marauders look like the Pillsbury Doughboy. The others burst into a fit of giggles and Lily and Remus gave in to the urge to poke Sirius and James. Peter and the twins soon followed in the poking, and Lily conjured a camera and took a picture. Finally Fred and George turned Sirius and James back to their normal selves and gave them the antidote to the potion.

James and Sirius walked to a corner and had a whispered discussion in how to get the twins back. Finally they came up with an idea and set it up. "Okay, we're ready. Come on over."

The twins exchanged looks, then took a few steps forward. When James and Sirius just stood there, wicked grins on their faces, Fred and George exchanged puzzled looks, then began backing away. However, both of them stepped into loops that had suddenly appeared behind them and got hooked up to the ceiling. They began bobbing up and down like they were bungee jumping. A Cushioning Charm kept them from banging their head. The others burst into laughter and after a few minutes, the twins used their wands to cut themselves down. They fell down on the ground in a heap, somewhat dizzy and embarrassed, but otherwise unhurt.

When the twins recovered, they conjured some Ton-Tongue Toffees and managed to get the Marauders to eat them. Their tongues began growing. The twins, Lily, and the other two Marauders burst into laughter and by the time Remus and Lily calmed down enough to shrink Sirius' and James' tongues, they had grown almost six feet.

More pranks were played, such as the twins transforming Sirius' and James' robes to bright green with "I love Snivellus Snape and want to kiss him" written in silver all over the robes. Lily, Remus, and Peter laughed over that until they almost cried. James and Sirius weren't amused at all, at least not until after they had transformed their robes back to normal. Then they admitted that it was a very good prank.

After, the twins found themselves wearing very frilly, lacy robes, and pink bows in their hair. Next to them, a table all set for tea appeared and the twins were ordered to have a tea party. However, when they poured out the tea, a green sludge appeared. Getting suspicious, they broke open a cream cake and found it stuffed with something red that was not strawberry jam. It turned to be sludge as well. Fred and George vanished the tea table and turned their robes back to normal.

Finally both sides declared themselves all out of pranks and Remus checked the scoreboard. The Marauders' side had a score of 24, while the twins had one of 25. "And the winners of this prank war are Fred and George Weasley!" announced Remus.

Then Remus nodded at Lily, who immediately set off the prank they had planned once the prank war was over. The James found himself in the kind of outfit Little Bo Peep might have worn, complete with a shepherd's crook. The twins were in sheep costumes. Sirius was in a sheep costume as well, but his was black. Then Lily recited, "Little Bo Peep has lost her sheep, but doesn't know where to find them. Leave them alone and they'll come home, wagging their tails behind them."

Then Remus recited, "Baa, baa, black sheep, have you any wool? Yes sir, yes sir, three bags full. One for my master, one for my dame, and one for the little boy who lives down the lane."

Three bags, presumably of wool, appeared next to Sirius and Peter said laughingly, "Okay, Sirius, you have to give Remus, Lily, and me each a bag of wool."

"What is this all about?" demanded James. "Why am I in this absurd Muggle outfit?"

"You're Little Bo Peep," said Lily. "I got the idea for the prank from Muggle nursery rhymes. Come on, Sirius, you have to act out the nursery rhyme Remus recited. Give a bag to Remus, then to me and Peter."

Sirius, looking grumpy, thrust the bags of wool at Lily, Remus, and Peter. "Happy now? And why do I have to be in this stupid black sheep's costume? Is it because of my last name?"

Peter grinned. "Yep. I got the idea to prank you guys once the prank war was over, Lily thought up of having you act out nusery rhymes, and Remus did most of the magic."

"Well, we're not going to walk about wagging our fake tails," snapped George.

"Though it is a good prank," said Fred. He began laughing when Remus pulled out a camera and took a photo of James in the Little Bo Peep costume.

"Hey!" protested James angrily.

Remus smirked. "It'll be good blackmail material, James. I can talk you out of a few pranks by threatening to make copies of this and spreading it around Hogwarts." He turned to Sirius, transformed the sheep outfit into the same one James was wearing, and took a photo of him as well.

Lily burst into laughter, then calmed down enough to transform the four boys back to their normal robes. Then Peter picked up the book and began reading the next chapter.

**CHAPTER SEVEN  
THE MINISTRY OF MAGIC**

**Harry awoke at half past five the next morning as abruptly and completely as if somebody had yelled in his ear. For a few moments he lay immobile as the prospect of the disciplinary hearing filled every tiny particle of his brain, then, unable to bear it, he leapt out of bed and put on his glasses. Mrs Weasley had laid out his freshly laundered jeans and T-shirt at the foot of his bed. Harry scrambled into them. The blank picture on the wall sniggered.**

"That portrait is getting annoying," said James. "If it is Phineas Nigellus, why doesn't he show himself?"

**Ron was lying sprawled on his back with his mouth wide open, fast asleep. He did not stir as Harry crossed the room, stepped out on to the landing and closed the door softly behind him. Trying not to think of the next time he would see Ron, when they might no longer be fellow students at Hogwarts, Harry walked quietly down the stairs, past the heads of Kreacher's ancestors, and down into the kitchen.**

"You'll be all right, Harry," said Lily. "There's still so much of the book, so it means you must have been let off."

**He had expected it to be empty, but when he reached the door he heard the soft rumble of voices on the other side. He pushed it open and saw Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, Sirius, Lupin and Tonks sitting there almost as though they were waiting for him. All were fully dressed except Mrs. Weasley, who was wearing a quilted purple dressing gown. She leapt to her feet the moment Harry entered.**

**"Breakfast," she said as she pulled out her wand and hurried over to the fire.**

**"M - m - morning, Harry," yawned Tonks. Her hair was blonde and curly this morning.**

"I hope it won't make her look like Narcissa," muttered Sirius.

**"Sleep all right?"**

**"Yeah," said Harry.**

**"I've b - b - been up all night," she said, with another shuddering yawn. "Come and sit down ..."**

**She drew out a chair, knocking over the one beside it in the process.**

"Clumsy as ever," commented Remus.

**"What do you want, Harry?" Mrs. Weasley called. "Porridge? Muffins? Kippers? Bacon and eggs? Toast?"**

**"Just - just toast, thanks," said Harry.**

**Lupin glanced at Harry, then said to Tonks, "What were you saying about Scrimgeour?"**

"Who's Scrimegeour?" asked Peter.

"I've heard of him," said James. "He's an Auror, I think."

"He is," said George. "He's the Head of the Auror Division in our time."

**"Oh ... yeah ... well, we need to be a bit more careful, he's been asking Kingsley and me funny questions ..."**

**Harry felt vaguely grateful that he was not required to join in the conversation. His insides were squirming. Mrs. Weasley placed a couple of pieces of toast and marmalade in front of him; he tried to eat, but it was like chewing carpet. Mrs. Weasley sat down on his other side and started fussing with his T-shirt, tucking in the label and smoothing out the creases across his shoulders. He wished she wouldn't.**

"But you have to be neat and presentable, Harry," said Lily. "Since I'm not there to do it, I'm glad Mrs. Weasley is."

**"... and I'll have to tell Dumbledore I can't do night duty tomorrow, I'm just too tired," Tonks finished, yawning hugely again.**

**"I'll cover for you," said Mr. Weasley. "I'm OK, I've got a report to finish anyway."**

**Mr. Weasley was not wearing wizards' robes but a pair of pinstriped trousers and an old bomber jacket. He turned from Tonks to Harry.**

**"How are you feeling?"**

**Harry shrugged.**

**"It'll all be over soon," Mr. Weasley said bracingly. "In a few hours' time you'll be cleared." Harry said nothing. "****The hearing's on my floor, in Amelia Bones's office. She's Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, and the one who'll be questioning you."**

"Hey, Amelia Bones was a few years above us, wasn't she?" asked James.

"Yeah," answered Sirius. "She was okay. I think Harry won't have to worry too much."

**"Amelia Bones is OK, Harry," said Tonks earnestly. "She's fair, she'll hear you out."**

"That's good," said Peter. "I just remembered, Susan Bones was sorted into Hufflepuff in the first book. So is Amelia her mother?"

"More likely she's Susan's aunt," corrected Remus. "If Amelia married, her last name would be changed to her husband's, unless she happens to be one of those women who keep their maiden name. And even if she did do that, any child of hers would take the father's name. Or it would be a hyphenated version, like Bones-Smith or something similar."

"She is Susan's aunt," said Fred. "We met Susan and she said so when Harry asked if she was related to Madam Bones."

**Harry nodded, still unable to think of anything to say.**

**"Don't lose your temper," said Sirius abruptly. "Be polite and stick to the facts."  
Harry nodded again.**

**"The law's on your side," said Lupin quietly. "Even underage wizards are allowed to use magic in life-threatening situations."**

"And Amelia will hear you out and no doubt let you off," said Sirius.

**Something very cold trickled down the back of Harry's neck; for a moment he thought someone was putting a Disillusionment Charm on him, then he realised that Mrs. Weasley was attacking his hair with a wet comb. She pressed hard on the top of his head.**

**"Doesn't it ever lie flat?" she said desperately.**

"He's a Potter," said James. "Their hair never lies flat. Well, for the boys, anyway."

**Harry shook his head.**

**Mr. Weasley checked his watch and looked up at Harry.**

**"I think we'll go now," he said. "We're a bit early but I think you'll be better off at the Ministry than hanging around here."**

**"OK," said Harry automatically, dropping his toast and getting to his feet.**

**"You'll be all right, Harry," said Tonks, patting him on the arm.**

**"Good luck," said Lupin. "I'm sure it will be fine."**

**"And if it's not," said Sirius grimly, "I'll see to Amelia Bones for you ..."**

"Sirius!" gasped Lily. "You really wouldn't do anything to Amelia Bones, would you?"

"I wouldn't do anything to her now," responded Sirius. "The future me in the book seems to have a different idea, though, so I wouldn't know."

**Harry smiled weakly. Mrs. Weasley hugged him.**

**"We've all got our fingers crossed," she said.**

**"Right," said Harry. "Well ... see you later then."**

**He followed Mr. Weasley upstairs and along the hall. He could hear Sirius's mother grunting in her sleep behind her curtains. Mr. Weasley unbolted the door and they stepped out into the cold, grey dawn.**

**"You don't normally walk to work, do you?" Harry asked him, as they set off briskly around the square.**

**"No, I usually Apparate," said Mr. Weasley, "but obviously you can't, and I think it's best we arrive in a thoroughly non-magical fashion ... makes a better impression, given what you're being disciplined for ..."**

"Yeah, I guess," sighed Peter.

**Mr. Weasley kept his hand inside his jacket as they walked. Harry knew it was clenched around his wand. The run-down streets were almost deserted, but when they arrived at the miserable little underground station they found it already full of early-morning commuters. As ever when he found himself in close proximity to Muggles going about their daily business, Mr. Weasley was hard put to contain his enthusiasm.**

"Which means Dad will be pointing out the different machines and jabber about them excitedly," sighed George.

**"Simply fabulous," he whispered, indicating the automatic ticket machines. "Wonderfully ingenious."**

**"They're out of order," said Harry, pointing at the sign.**

**"Yes, but even so ..." said Mr. Weasley, beaming at them fondly.**

"Thought so," said Fred, rolling his eyes.

**They bought their tickets instead from a sleepy-looking guard (Harry handled the transaction, as Mr. Weasley was not very good with Muggle money) and five minutes later they were boarding an underground train that rattled them off towards the centre of London. Mr. Weasley kept anxiously checking and re-checking the Underground Map above the windows.**

**"Four more stops, Harry ... Three stops left now ... Two stops to go, Harry ..."**

**They got off at a station in the very heart of London, and were swept from the train in a tide of besuited men and women carrying briefcases. Up the escalator they went, through the ticket barrier (Mr. Weasley delighted with the way the stile swallowed his ticket), and emerged on to a broad street lined with imposing-looking buildings and already full of traffic.**

"Looks like they're in the part of London where all the government buildings are," commented Lily.

**"Where are we?" said Mr. Weasley blankly, and for one heart-stopping moment Harry thought they had got off at the wrong station despite Mr. Weasley's continual references to the map; but a second later he said, "Ah yes ... this way, Harry," and led him down a side road.**

**"Sorry," he said, "but I never come by train and it all looks rather different from a Muggle perspective. As a matter of fact, I've never even used the visitors' entrance before."**

"What's the visitor's entrance?" asked Sirius.

"I believe Dad said it was an out-of-order telephone box," replied George.

**The further they walked, the smaller and less imposing the buildings became, until finally they reached a street that contained several rather shabby-looking offices, a pub and an overflowing skip. Harry had expected a rather more impressive location for the Ministry of Magic.**

"Actually, the Ministry of Magic is underground," said Remus.

**"Here we are," said Mr. Weasley brightly, pointing at an old red telephone box, which was missing several panes of glass and stood before a heavily graffitied wall. "After you, Harry." ****He opened the telephone-box door.**

**Harry stepped inside, wondering what on earth this was about. **

"You just dial a number, get a badge if you're a vistor, and then get taken to the lobby," said Fred.

**Mr. Weasley folded himself in beside Harry and closed the door. It was a tight fit; Harry was jammed against the telephone apparatus, which was hanging crookedly from the wall as though a vandal had tried to rip it off. Mr Weasley reached past Harry for the receiver.**

**"Mr. Weasley, I think this might be out of order, too," Harry said.**

**"No, no, I'm sure it's fine," said Mr. Weasley, holding the receiver above his head and peering at the dial. "Let's see ... six ..." he dialled the number, "two ... four ... and another four ... and another two ..."**

Lily took out a piece of parchment and began writing on it. After a minute, she exclaimed, "Got it! Six-two-four-four-two spells 'magic'!" Seeing the others' confused looks, she explained, "The numbers on the telephone, except for one and zero, also have letters." She showed the telephone dial she had drawn.

"I see," said James. "Well, if you forget the number to the Ministry, as long as you remember the word 'magic', you'll be fine."

**As the dial whirred smoothly back into place, a cool female voice sounded inside the telephone box, not from the receiver in Mr. Weasley's hand, but as loudly and plainly as though an invisible woman were standing right beside them.**

"So that's how it works," commented Sirius. "I wonder if that's how you get into the Ministry now."

**"Welcome to the Ministry of Magic. Please state your name and business."**

**"Er ..." said Mr. Weasley, clearly uncertain whether or not he should talk into the receiver. ****He compromised by holding the mouthpiece to his ear, "Arthur Weasley, Misuse of Muggle Artefacts Office, here to escort Harry Potter, who has been asked to attend a disciplinary hearing ..."**

**"Thank you," said the cool female voice. "Visitor, please take the badge and attach it to the front of your robes."**

"Whoever that woman is, she doesn't seem to be showing much emotion," commented Peter. "Her job must be a bit boring.

**There was a click and a rattle, and Harry saw something slide out of the metal chute where returned coins usually appeared. He picked it up: it was a square silver badge with _Harry Potter, Disciplinary Hearing_ on it. He pinned it to the front of his T-shirt as the female voice spoke again.**

**"Visitor to the Ministry, you are required to submit to a search and present your wand for registration at the security desk, which is located at the far end of the Atrium."**

"Still the same procedure," said James. "I've been to the Ministry a couple of time with Dad."

**The floor of the telephone box shuddered. They were sinking slowly into the ground.**

"So the telephone box also works as a lift," said Lily thoughtfully.

**Harry watched apprehensively as the pavement seemed to rise up past the glass windows of the telephone box until darkness closed over their heads. Then he could see nothing at all; he could hear only a dull grinding noise as the telephone box made its way down through the earth. After about a minute, though it felt much longer to Harry, a chink of golden light illuminated his feet and, widening, rose up his body, until it hit him in the face and he had to blink to stop his eyes watering.**

"They've arrived," said Sirius.

**"The Ministry of Magic wishes you a pleasant day," said the woman's voice.**

**The door of the telephone box sprang open and Mr. Weasley stepped out of it, followed by Harry, whose mouth had fallen open.**

**They were standing at one end of a very long and splendid hall with a highly polished, dark wood floor. The peacock blue ceiling was inlaid with gleaming golden symbols that kept moving and changing like some enormous heavenly noticeboard. The walls on each side were panelled in shiny dark wood and had many gilded fireplaces set into them. Every few seconds a witch or wizard would emerge from one of the left-hand fireplaces with a soft whoosh. On the right-hand side, short queues were forming before each fireplace, waiting to depart.**

"Wow, the lobby area looks nice," said Lily.

**Halfway down the hall was a fountain. A group of golden statues, larger than life-size, stood in the middle of a circular pool. Tallest of them all was a noble-looking wizard with his wand pointing straight up in the air. Grouped around him were a beautiful witch, a centaur, a goblin and a house-elf. The last three were all looking adoringly up at the witch and wizard. **

"Okay, a house-elf might look adoringly at a witch and wizard, but not a centaur or goblin," said James, frowning. "That fountain needs to be changed." The others nodded in agreement.

**Glittering jets of water were flying from the ends of their wands, the point of the centaur's arrow, the tip of the goblins hat and each of the house-elf's ears, so that the tinkling hiss of falling water was added to the pops and cracks of the Apparators and the clatter of footsteps as hundreds of witches and wizards, most of whom were wearing glum, early-morning looks, strode towards a set of golden gates at the far end of the hall.**

**"This way," said Mr. Weasley.**

**They joined the throng, wending their way between the Ministry workers, some of whom were carrying tottering piles of parchment, others battered briefcases; still others were reading the Daily Prophet while they walked. As they passed the fountain Harry saw silver Sickles and bronze Knuts glinting up at him from the bottom of the pool. A small smudged sign beside it read:**

**ALL PROCEEDS FROM THE FOUNTAIN OF MAGICAL BRETHREN WILL BE GIVEN TO ST. MUNGO'S HOSPITAL FOR MAGICAL MALADIES AND INJURIES.**

**_If I'm not expelled from Hogwarts, I'll put in ten Galleons_, Harry found himself thinking desperately.**

"You won't be expelled, Harry," said Remus, "so I'm certain you'll put in the ten galleons."

**"Over here, Harry," said Mr. Weasley, and they stepped out of the stream of Ministry employees heading for the golden gates. Seated at a desk to the left, beneath a sign saying Security, a badly-shaven wizard in peacock blue robes looked up as they approached and put down his Daily Prophet.**

**"I'm escorting a visitor," said Mr. Weasley, gesturing towards Harry.**

**"Step over here," said the wizard in a bored voice.**

**Harry walked closer to him and the wizard held up a long golden rod, thin and flexible as a car aerial, and passed it up and down Harry's front and back.**

"Sounds like the wizarding equalivalent of a metal detector," said Lily. "That's a Muggle device that beeps when it detects metal on somebody and then the person using it can check if it's a weapon or not."

**"Wand," grunted the security wizard at Harry, putting down the golden instrument and holding out his hand.**

**Harry produced his wand. The wizard dropped it on to a strange brass instrument, which looked something like a set of scales with only one dish. It began to vibrate. A narrow strip of parchment came speeding out of a slit in the base. The wizard tore this off and read the writing on it.**

**"Eleven inches, phoenix-feather core, been in use four years. That correct?"**

"Of course," said Remus.

**"Yes," said Harry nervously.**

**"I keep this," said the wizard, impaling the slip of parchment on a small brass spike. "You get this back," he added, thrusting the wand at Harry.**

**"Thank you."**

**"Hang on ..." said the wizard slowly.**

**His eyes had darted from the silver visitors badge on Harry's chest to his forehead.**

"Oh great, another person who realizes who Harry is and has to check out his scar," groaned James.

**"Thank you, Eric," said Mr. Weasley firmly, and grasping Harry by the shoulder he steered him away from the desk and back into the stream of wizards and witches walking through the golden gates.**

**Jostled slightly by the crowd, Harry followed Mr. Weasley through the gates into the smaller hall beyond, where at least twenty lifts stood behind wrought golden grilles. Harry and Mr. Weasley joined the crowd around one of them. Nearby, stood a big bearded wizard holding a large cardboard box which was emitting rasping noises.**

**"All right, Arthur?" said the wizard, nodding at Mr. Weasley.**

**"What've you got there, Bob?" asked Mr. Weasley, looking at the box.**

**"We're not sure," said the wizard seriously. 'We thought it was a bog-standard chicken until it started breathing fire. Looks like a serious breach of the Ban on Experimental Breeding to me."**

"Probably," said Remus.

**With a great jangling and clattering a lift descended in front of them; the golden grille slid back and Harry and Mr. Weasley stepped into the lift with the rest of the crowd and Harry found himself jammed against the back wall. Several witches and wizards were looking at him curiously; he stared at his feet to avoid catching anyone's eye, flattening his fringe as he did so. **

"Good idea, Harry," said Sirius.

**The grilles slid shut with a crash and the lift ascended slowly, chains rattling, while the same cool female voice Harry had heard in the telephone box rang out again.**

**"Level Seven, Department of Magical Games and Sports, incorporating the British and Irish Quidditch League Headquarters, Official Gobstones Club, and Ludicrous Patents Office."**

**The lift doors opened. Harry glimpsed an untidy-looking corridor, with various posters of Quidditch teams tacked lopsidedly on the walls. One of the wizards in the lift, who was carrying an armful of broomsticks, extricated himself with difficulty and disappeared down the corridor. The doors closed, the lift juddered upwards again and the woman's voice announced: ****"Level Six, Department of Magical Transportation, incorporating the Floo Network Authority, Broom Regulatory Control, Portkey Office and Apparation Test Centre."**

"This is getting boring," complained Fred. "I've been to the Ministry before with Dad and I really don't need to hear this,"

"Well, I've never been to the Ministry, so this is actually quite interesting for me!" snapped Lily.

**Once again the lift doors opened and four or five witches and wizards got out; at the same time, several paper aeroplanes swooped into the lift. Harry stared up at them as they flapped idly around above his head; they were a pale violet colour and he could see Ministry of Magic stamped along the edge of their wings.**

"Oh yeah, the memos," said James. "Owls got to be too messy, so they made the memos into paper aeroplanes and magicked them."

**"Just inter-departmental memos," Mr. Weasley muttered to him. "We used to use owls, but the mess was unbelievable ... droppings all over the desks ..."**

**As they clattered upwards again the memos flapped around the lamp swaying from the lift's ceiling.**

**"Level Five, Department of International Magical Cooperation, incorporating the International Magical Trading Standards Body, the International Magical Office of Law and the International Confederation of Wizards, British Seats."**

**When the doors opened, two of the memos zoomed out with a few more of the witches and wizards, but several more memos zoomed in, so that the light from the lamp flickered and flashed overhead as they darted around it.**

**"Level Four, Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, incorporating Beast, Being and Spirit Divisions, Goblin Liaison Office and Pest Advisory Bureau."**

Sirius and the Weasley twins yawned in boredom, while Remus commented, "The guy with the fire-breathing chicken will be getting off here."

**"S'cuse," said the wizard carrying the fire-breathing chicken and he left the lift pursued by a little flock of memos. The doors clanged shut yet again.**

**"Level Three, Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes, including the Accidental Magic Reversal Squad, Obliviator Headquarters and Muggle-Worthy Excuse Committee."**

**Everybody left the lift on this floor except Mr. Weasley, Harry and a witch who was reading an extremely long piece of parchment that was trailing on the floor. The remaining memos continued to soar around the lamp as the lift juddered upwards again, then the doors opened and the voice made its announcement.**

**"Level Two, Department of Magical Law Enforcement, including the Improper Use of Magic Office, Auror Headquarters and Wizengamot Administration Services."**

"And that would be Arthur's floor and he and Harry will get off," said James.

**"This is us, Harry," said Mr. Weasley, and they followed the witch out of the lift into a corridor lined with doors. "My office is on the other side of the floor."**

**"Mr. Weasley" said Harry, as they passed a window through which sunlight was streaming, "aren't we still underground?"**

"Yes, but like the ceiling in the Great Hall at Hogwarts, the windows are enchanted," said Remus. "Magical Maintence decides what kind weather they'll get. I suppose if they want a pay raise, they'll probably make storms or something."

**"Yes, we are," said Mr. Weasley. "Those are enchanted windows. Magical Maintenance decide what weather we'll get every day. We had two months of hurricanes last time they were angling for a pay rise ... Just round here, Harry."**

**They turned a corner, walked through a pair of heavy oak doors and emerged in a cluttered open area divided into cubicles, which was buzzing with talk and laughter. Memos were zooming in and out of cubicles like miniature rockets. A lopsided sign on the nearest cubicle read: Auror Headquarters.**

"I wonder if they'll see Tonks," said Peter.

"I don't think so, since she's still in Grimmauld Place," said Remus. "But they'll probably run into Kingsley Shacklebolt."

**Harry looked surreptitiously through the doorways as they passed. The Aurors had covered their cubicle walls with everything from pictures of wanted wizards and photographs of their families, to posters of their favourite Quidditch teams and articles from the Daily Prophet. A scarlet-robed man with a ponytail longer than Bill's was sitting with his boots up on his desk, dictating a report to his quill. A little further along, a witch with a patch over one eye was talking over the top of her cubicle wall to Kingsley Shacklebolt.**

"You were right about them running into Kingsley," said George.

**"Morning, Weasley," said Kingsley carelessly, as they drew nearer. "I've been wanting a word with you, have you got a second?"**

**"Yes, if it really is a second," said Mr. Weasley, "I'm in rather a hurry."**

**They were talking as though they hardly knew each other and when Harry opened his mouth to say hello to Kingsley, Mr. Weasley stood on his foot. **

"Why are they acting like that?" asked Peter.

"Come on, the Order of the Phoenix is a secret group!" exclaimed James. "The members can't act as if they're friends unless they already were before they joined the Order."

**They followed Kingsley along the row and into the very last cubicle.**

**Harry received a slight shock; blinking down at him from every direction was Sirius's face. Newspaper cuttings and old photographs - even the one of Sirius being best man at the Potters' wedding -papered the walls. The only Sirius-free space was a map of the world in which little red pins were glowing like jewels.**

"What?" asked Sirius, blinking. "Oh right, Kingsley's in charge of the search for me."

**"Here," said Kingsley brusquely to Mr. Weasley, shoving a sheaf of parchment into his hand. "I need as much information as possible on flying Muggle vehicles sighted in the last twelve months. We've received information that Black might still be using his old motorcycle."**

Sirius snorted. "Well, I'm not using it. Hey, I wonder what happened to it. Hagrid had it last."

**Kingsley tipped Harry an enormous wink and added, in a whisper, "Give him the magazine, he might find it interesting."**

"What magazine?" asked Peter. "And if he's referring to Sirius, what would he find interesting?" The others shrugged.

**Then he said in normal tones, "And don't take too long, Weasley, the delay on that firelegs report held our investigation up for a month."**

**"If you had read my report you would know that the term is firearms," said Mr. Weasley coolly. "And I'm afraid you'll have to wait for information on motorcycles; we're extremely busy at the moment." He dropped his voice and said, "If you can get away before seven, Molly's making meatballs."**

**He beckoned to Harry and led him out of Kingsley's cubicle, through a second set of oak doors, into another passage, turned left, marched along another corridor, turned right into a dimly lit and distinctly shabby corridor, and finally reached a dead end, where a door on the left stood ajar, revealing a broom cupboard, and a door on the right bore a tarnished brass plaque reading: Misuse of Muggle Artefacts.**

**Mr.**** Weasley's dingy office seemed to be slightly smaller than the broom cupboard. **

"Excuse me?" asked Lily. "Why would an office be smaller than a broom cupboard? Just because the Misuse of Muggle Artefacts office isn't a very important one doesn't mean it can have a tiny office!"

"Well, Dad doesn't mind too much," said George.

**Two desks had been crammed inside it and there was barely space to move around them because of all the overflowing filing cabinets lining the walls, on top of which were tottering piles of files. The little wall space available bore witness to Mr. Weasley's obsessions: several posters of cars, including one of a dismantled engine; two illustrations of postboxes he seemed to have cut out of Muggle children's books; and a diagram showing how to wire a plug.**

**Sitting on top of Mr. Weasley's overflowing in-tray was an old toaster that was hiccoughing in a disconsolate way and a pair of empty leather gloves that were twiddling their thumbs. A photograph of the Weasley family stood beside the in-tray. Harry noticed that Percy appeared to have walked out of it.**

Fred and George growled and looked angry.

**"We haven't got a window," said Mr. Weasley apologetically, taking off his bomber jacket and placing it on the back of his chair. "We've asked, but they don't seem to think we need one. Have a seat, Harry, doesn't look as if Perkins is in yet."**

**Harry squeezed himself into the chair behind Perkins's desk while Mr. Weasley riffled through the sheaf of parchment Kingsley Shacklebolt had given him.**

**"Ah," he said, grinning, as he extracted a copy of a magazine entitled _The Quibbler_ from its midst, **

"That explains it," said Remus, sounding amused. "It came out a year ago and the articles are certainly very amusing."

**"yes ..." He flicked through it. "Yes, he's right, I'm sure Sirus will find that very amusing - **

"Must be an article about me," said Sirius. "Only it'll be about something ridculous, like I'm the son of Moldywart or I'm innocent because I'm really Gilderoy Lockhart."

**oh dear, what's this now?"**

**A memo had just zoomed in through the open door and fluttered to rest on top of the hiccoughing toaster. Mr Weasley unfolded it and read it aloud.**

**"'Third regurgitating public toilet reported in Bethnal Green, kindly investigate immediately.' This is getting ridiculous ..."**

"Oh yuck!" exclaimed Lily, pulling a face.

"What?" asked Peter, frowning. Then he remembered the meaning of 'regurgitating' and made a face like the others.

**"A regurgitating toilet?"**

**"Anti-Muggle pranksters," said Mr. Weasley, frowning. "We had two last week, one in Wimbledon, one in Elephant and Castle. Muggles are pulling the flush and instead of everything disappearing - well, you can imagine. The poor things keep calling in those - pumbles, I think they're called - you know, the ones who mend pipes and things."**

"They're called plumbers," said Lily.

"It is disgusting, but it would be a good prank to play on Snivellus or the Dursleys," said James. Sirius nodded and added it to his list of prank ideas.

The twins then asked about Sirius' lists, and then said, "Well, you're going to need to make a new one later on in this book, Sirius."

"Harry said so when we wished him here," said Sirius. "Who is it on?"

Fred opened his mouth, but George nudged him and said, "We can't, or this Perdita person will removed us."

**"Plumbers?"**

**"Exactly, yes, but of course they're flummoxed. I only hope we can catch whoever's doing it."**

**"Will it be Aurors who catch them?"**

**"Oh no, this is too trivial for Aurors, it'll be the ordinary Magical Law Enforcement Patrol - ah, Harry, this is Perkins."**

**A stooped, timid-looking old wizard with fluffy white hair had just entered the room, panting.**

**"Oh, Arthur!" he said desperately, without looking at Harry. "Thank goodness, I didn't know what to do for the best, whether to wait here for you or not. I've just sent an owl to your home but you've obviously missed it - an urgent message came ten minutes ago -"**

**"I know about the regurgitating toilet," said Mr Weasley.**

**"No, no, it's not the toilet, it's the Potter boy's hearing - they've changed the time and venue - it starts at eight o'clock now and it's down in old Courtroom Ten -"**

"_What_?" gasped Lily. "Why have they changed the time?"

"And why is it being held in old Courtroom Ten?" demanded James angrily. "That's only being used when Death Eaters are being tried!"

"Actually it hasn't been used in years," said George. "Oh wait, that's our time."

"_Hasn't been used in years_?" repeated Sirius, as angry as James. He grabbed his quill, then realized that he had nobody he could really get back at, unless he wanted to target the entire Ministry, which was rather stupid. He put down the quill and hoped he could find out who was responsible for the change soon.

"So why is the hearing being held there instead of in Amelia Bones' office?" asked Remus. "What, is the entire Wizengamot going to try him?"

Peter gasped. "I hope not. That would be terrible."

**"Down in old - but they told me - Merlin's beard!"**

**Mr. Weasley looked at his watch, let out a yelp and leapt from his chair.  
"Quick, Harry, we should have been there five minutes ago!"**

"Oh no, they're late," groaned Lily.

**Perkins flattened himself against the filing cabinets as Mr. Weasley left the office at a run, Harry close on his heels.**

**"Why have they changed the time?" Harry said breathlessly, as they hurtled past the Auror cubicles; people poked out their heads and stared as they streaked past. Harry felt as though he'd left all his insides back at Perkins's desk.**

**"I've no idea, but thank goodness we got here so early, if you'd missed it, it would have been catastrophic!"**

"It would have been," said Peter, shivering.

**Mr Weasley skidded to a halt beside the lifts and jabbed impatiently at the 'down' button.  
"Come ON!"**

**The lift clattered into view and they hurried inside. Every time it stopped Mr. Weasley cursed furiously and pummelled the number nine button.**

**"Those courtrooms haven't been used in years," said Mr. Weasley angrily. "I can't think why they're doing it down there - unless -but no -"**

"I think Dad's thinking along the same lines as you, Professor Lup-er, Remus," said Fred.

"If the entire Wizengamot is trying my son, I swear I'll find out whoever's responsible and hex them into oblivion!" snapped James.

**A plump witch carrying a smoking goblet entered the lift at that moment, and Mr. Weasley did not elaborate.**

**"The Atrium," said the cool female voice and the golden grilles slid open, showing Harry a distant glimpse of the golden statues in the fountain. The plump witch got out and a sallow-skinned wizard with a very mournful face got in.**

**"Morning, Arthur," he said in a sepulchral voice as the lift began to descend. "Don't often see you down here."**

**"Urgent business, Bode," said Mr. Weasley, who was bouncing on the balls of his feet and throwing anxious looks over at Harry.**

**"Ah, yes," said Bode, surveying Harry unblinkingly. "Of course."**

**Harry barely had emotion to spare for Bode, but his unfaltering gaze did not make him feel any more comfortable.**

**"Department of Mysteries," said the cool female voice, and left it at that.**

"Looks like this Bode person works for the Department of Mysteries," commented Peter.

"That's not important!" snapped Sirius. "The hearing is!"

**"Quick, Harry," said Mr. Weasley as the lift doors rattled open, and they sped up a corridor that was quite different from those above. The walls were bare; there were no windows and no doors apart from a plain black one set at the very end of the corridor.  
Harry expected them to go through it, but instead Mr. Weasley seized him by the arm and dragged him to the left, where there was an opening leading to a flight of steps.**

"Well, I've never been here before," said James. "I don't understand why the hearing had to be moved down there. This is ridculous."

**"Down here, down here," panted Mr. Weasley, taking two steps at a time. "The lift doesn't even come down this far ... why they're doing it down there I ..."**

**They reached the bottom of the steps and ran along yet another corridor, which bore a great resemblance to the one that led to Snape's dungeon at Hogwarts, with rough stone walls and torches in brackets. The doors they passed here were heavy wooden ones with iron bolts and keyholes.**

**"Courtroom ... Ten ... I think ... we're nearly ... yes."**

**Mr. Weasley stumbled to a halt outside a grimy dark door with an immense iron lock and slumped against the wall, clutching at a stitch in his chest.**

**"Go on," he panted, pointing his thumb at the door. "Get in there."**

"Isn't Arthur going to go in with him?" asked Lily.

"I don't think he's allowed, Lily," said Remus gently. "But I'm sure Dumbledore will be there to be Harry's defense or something."

**"Aren't - aren't you coming with -?"**

**"No, no, I'm not allowed. Good luck!"**

**Harry's heart was beating a violent tattoo against his Adam's apple. He swallowed hard, turned the heavy iron door handle and stepped inside the courtroom.**

"I really hopt it's not the entire Wizengamot trying Harry," said Sirius. Fred and George looked grim, but didn't say anything. After a few minutes, they exchanged prank ideas with James and Sirius, then bid everyone good-bye and left. Finally Remus took the book and started the next chapter.


	8. The Hearing

Author's Note: I am dreadfully sorry about the long time it took to update. I was busy with exams and such, so had little time to update. My sister was busy as well, or I'd have asked her to write this chapter for me. My exams are over now, so I promise I will update more frequently. In apology, I send everyone a basket of virtual cookies and chocolate to all my readers who had to wait so long for this chapter. Again, I am dreadfully sorry about the wait.

**The Hearing**

**Harry gasped; he could not help himself. The large dungeon he had entered was horribly familiar. He had not only seen it before, he had been here before. This was the place he had visited inside Dumbledore's Pensieve, the place where he had watched the Lestranges sentenced to life imprisonment in Azkaban.**

"_What?_" yelped James. "But - but - that's totally unfair! They can't try Harry in there!"

**The walls were made of dark stone, dimly lit by torches. Empty benches rose on either side of him, but ahead, in the highest benches of all, were many shadowy figures. They had been talking in low voices, but as the heavy door swung closed behind Harry an ominous silence fell.**

"This sounds terrible," said Peter, shivering.

**A cold male voice rang across the courtroom.**

**'You're late.'**

**'Sorry,' said Harry nervously 'I — I didn't know the time had been changed.'**

**'That is not the Wizengamot's fault,' said the voice. 'An owl was sent to you this morning. Take your seat.'**

"Oh no," groaned Remus. "I was right, the entire Wizengamot _is_ in charge of the hearing." Sirius and James cursesd.

**Harry dropped his gaze to the chair in the centre of the room, the arms of which were covered in chains. He had seen those chains spring to life and bind** **whoever sat between them. **

"If those chains bind Harry, I'll - I'll- ," began Sirius threateningly.

**His footsteps echoed loudly as he walked across the stone floor. When he sat gingerly on the edge of the chair the chains clinked threateningly, but did not bind him. **

"Good," said James, but he still didn't look happy.

**Feeling rather sick, he looked up at the people seated at the bench above.**

**There were about fifty of them, all, as far as he could see, wearing plum-coloured robes with an elaborately worked silver W on the left-hand side of the chest and all staring down their noses at him, some with very austere expressions, others looks of frank curiosity.**

"The curious ones might be on Harry's side," said Lily. "But I think the austere ones won't, no matter what Harry says."

**In the very middle of the front row sat Cornelius Fudge, the Minister for Magic. Fudge was a portly man who often sported a lime-green bowler hat, though today he had dispensed with it; he had dispensed, too, with the indulgent smile he had once worn when he spoke to Harry. **

"I'm getting the feeling that Fudge is the one responsible for this," said Remus. Sirius grabbed his miscellaneous list and quckly began writing.

**A broad, square-jawed witch with very short grey hair sat on Fudge's left; she wore a monocle and looked forbidding. On Fudge's right was another witch, but she was sitting so far back on the bench that her face was in shadow.**

**'Very well,' said Fudge. 'The accused being present - finally - let us begin. Are you ready?' he called down the row.**

**'Yes, sir,' said an eager voice Harry knew. Ron's brother Percy was sitting at the very end of the front bench. Harry looked at Percy, expecting some sign of recognition from him, but none came. Percy's eyes, behind his horn'rimmed glasses, were fixed on his parchment, a quill poised in his hand.**

Sirius wrote again on his list. James snapped, "Percy should know better. But he's letting ambition get in the way of things. I'm surprised he wasn't in Slytherin."

**'Disciplinary hearing of the twelfth of August,' said Fudge in a ringing voice, and Percy began taking notes at once, 'into offences committed under the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery and the International Statute of Serecy by Harry James Potter, resident at number four, Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey.**

**'Interrogators: Cornelius Oswald Fudge, Minister for Magic; Amelia Susan Bones, Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement; Dolores Jane Umbridge, Senior Undersecretary to the Minister. Court Scribe, Percy Ignatius Weasley - '**

**'Witness for the defence, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore,' said a quiet voice from behind Harry, who turned his head so fast he cricked his neck.**

"Dumbledore's here!' exclaimed Peter. "Now everything will be all right."

**Dumbledore was striding serenely across the room wearing long midnight-blue robes and a perfectly calm expression. His long silver beard and hair gleamed in the torchlight as he drew level with Harry and looked up at Fudge through the half-moon spectacles that rested halfway down his very crooked nose.**

**The members of the Wizengamot were muttering. All eyes were now on Dumbledore. Some looked annoyed, others slightly frightened; two elderly witches in the back row, however, raised their hands and waved in welcome.**

"Well, at least not everybody hates Dumbledore," said Remus.

**A powerful emotion had risen in Harry's chest at the sight of Dumbledore, a fortified, hopeful feeling rather like that which phoenix song gave him. He wanted to catch Dumbledore's eye, but Dumbledore was not looking his way; he was continuing to look up at the obviously flustered Fudge.**

**'Ah,' said Fudge, who looked thoroughly disconcerted. 'Dumbledore. Yes. You - er - got our - er - message that the time and - er - place of the hearing had been changed, then?'**

"Looks like it was done on purpose," snapped Lily. "Probably hoping that Dumbledore wouldn't show up then."

**'I must have missed it,' said Dumbledore cheerfully. 'However, due to a lucky mistake I arrived at the Ministry three hours early, so no harm done.'**

**'Yes - well - I suppose we'll need another chair - I - Weasley, could you -?'**

**'Not to worry, not to worry,' said Dumbledore pleasantly; he took out his wand, gave it a little flick, and a squashy chintz armchair appeared out of nowhere next to Harry.**

"So typical of Dumbledore," commented James. "Now let's hope he can help Harry out of this mess."

**Dumbledore sat down, put the tips of his long fingers together and surveyed Fudge over them with an expression of polite interest. The Wizengamot was still muttering and fidgeting restlessly; only when Fudge spoke again did they settle down.**

**'Yes,' said Fudge again, shuffling his notes. 'Well, then. So. The charges. Yes.'**

**He extricated a piece of parchment from the pile before him, took a deep breath, and read out, 'The charges against the accused are as follows:**

**'That he did knowingly, deliberately and in full awareness of the illegality of his actions, having received a previous written warning from the Ministry of Magic on a similar charge, produce a Patronus Charm in a Muggle-inhabited area, in the presence of a Muggle, on the second of August at twenty-three minutes past nine, which constitutes an offence under Paragraph C of the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery, 1875, and also under Section 13 of the International Confederation of Warlocks' Statute of Secrecy.**

"He did it because of the dementors!" snapped Lily. "Harry knows better than to do magic outside of school unless he had good reason to!"

**'You are Harry James Potter, of number four, Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey?' Fudge said, glaring at Harry over the top of his parchment.**

**'Yes,' Harry said.**

**'You received an official warning from the Ministry for using illegal magic three years ago, did you not?'**

"Yes, but Harry wasn't responsible for that one!" snapped James. "Dobby was the one that did magic."

**'Yes, but -'**

**'And yet you conjured a Patronus on the night of the second of August?' said Fudge.**

**'Yes,' said Harry, 'but -'**

**'Knowing that you are not permitted to use magic outside school while you are under the age of seventeen?'**

"Hey, let Harry finish speaking!" protested Sirius. "Don't interrupt him."

**'Yes, but -'**

**'Knowing that you were in an area full of Muggles?'**

**'Yes, but -'**

**'Fully aware that you were in close proximity to a Muggle at the time?'**

"Yes, but Harry only did the Patronus Charm because of the stupid Dementors!" yelled Remus angrily.

**'Yes,' said Harry angrily, 'but I only used it because we were -'**

**The witch with the monocle cut across him in a booming voice.**

**'You produced a fully-fledged Patronus?'**

**'Yes,' said Harry, 'because -'**

**'A corporeal Patronus?'**

**'A - what?' said Harry.**

**'Your Patronus had a clearly defined form? I mean to say, it was more than vapour or smoke?'**

"Of course," said Peter. "It's been a stag since Harry's third year."

**'Yes,' said Harry, feeling both impatient and slightly desperate, 'it's a stag, it's always a stag.'**

**'Always?' boomed Madam Bones. 'You have produced a Patronus before now?'**

Lily looked imaptient. "Yes! Harry's been able to produce a Patronus since the end of third year!"

**'Yes,' said Harry, 'I've been doing it for over a year.'**

**'And you are fifteen years old?'**

**'Yes, and -'**

**'You learned this at school?'**

**'Yes, Professor Lupin taught me in my third year, because of the -'**

**'Impressive,' said Madam Bones, staring down at him, 'a true Patronus at his age… very impressive indeed.'**

"It is," said James, sounding proud. Then he became worried again.

**Some of the wizards and witches around her were muttering again; a few nodded, but others were frowning and shaking their heads.**

**'It's not a question of how impressive the magic was,' said Fudge in a testy voice, 'in fact, the more impressive the worse it is, I would have thought, given that the boy did it in plain view of a Muggle!'**

**Those who had been frowning now murmured in agreement, but it was the sight of Percy's sanctimonious little nod that goaded Harry into speech.**

**'I did it because of the Dementors!' he said loudly, before anyone could interrupt him again.**

**He had expected more muttering, but the silence that fell seemed to be somehow denser than before.**

"Why are they silent now?" asked Peter. "Shouldn't they be worried that something like this happened?"

**'Dementors?' said Madam Bones after a moment, her thick eyebrows rising until her monocle looked in danger of falling out. 'What do you mean, boy?'**

**'I mean there were two Dementors down that alleyway and they went for me and my cousin!'**

**'Ah,' said Fudge again, smirking unpleasantly as he looked around at the Wizengamot, as though inviting them to share the joke. 'Yes. Yes, I thought we'd be hearing something like this.'**

"He doesn't believe Harry!" raged Sirius. He began adding to his list.

**'Dementors in Little Whinging?' Madam Bones said, in a tone of great surprise. 'I don't understand -'**

**'Don't you, Amelia?' said Fudge, still smirking. 'Let me explain. He's been thinking it through and decided Dementors would make a very nice little cover story, very nice indeed. Muggles can't see Dementors, can they, boy? Highly convenient, highly convenient… so it's just your word and no witnesses…'**

"Harry's not lying!" snapped Remus. "And Mrs. Figg was there, so she's a witness!"

**'I'm not lying!' said Harry loudly, over another outbreak of muttering from the court. 'There were two of them, coming from opposite ends of the alley, everything went dark and cold and my cousin felt them and ran for it -'**

**'Enough, enough!' said Fudge, with a very supercilious look on his face. 'I'm sorry to interrupt what I'm sure would have been a very well-rehearsed story -'**

"It's not a well-rehearsed story!" protested Peter. "It really happened."

**Dumbledore cleared his throat. The Wizengamot fell silent again.**

**'We do, in fact, have a witness to the presence of Dementors in that alleyway,' he said, 'other than Dudley Dursley, I mean.'**

James smiled. "Yeah, Mrs. Figg was there."

Lily frowned. "But can Squibs see Dementors?"

"I don't know," responded Remus. "But even if Mrs. Figg couldn't see them, she would have still felt the effects."

**Fudge's plump face seemed to slacken, as though somebody had let air out of it. He stared down at Dumbledore for a moment or two, then, with the appearance of a man pulling himself back together, said, 'We haven't got time to listen to more tarradiddles, I'm afraid, Dumbledore. I want this dealt with quickly -'**

"But under the Wizengamot Charter of Rights, the accused has the right to present witnesses!" exclaimed Sirius. "What in Merlin's name are you doing Fudge?"

**'I may be wrong,' said Dumbledore pleasantly, 'but I am sure that under the Wizengamot Charter of Rights, the accused has the right to present witnesses for his or her case? Isn't that the policy of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, Madam Bones?' he continued, addressing the witch in the monocle.**

**'True,' said Madam Bones. 'Perfectly true.'**

"So that's Amelia Bones," said Peter. "She's changed since she was last in school."

**'Oh, very well, very well,' snapped Fudge. 'Where is this person?'**

**'I brought her with me,' said Dumbledore. 'She's just outside the door. Should I -?'**

**'No — Weasley, you go,' Fudge barked at Percy, who got up at once, ran down the stone steps from the judge's balcony and hurried past Dumbledore and Harry without glancing at them.**

**A moment later, Percy returned, followed by Mrs. Figg. She looked scared and more batty than ever. Harry wished she had thought to change out of her carpet slippers.**

"Oh dear," said Lily. "Mrs. Figg should have made herself look more presentable."

**Dumbledore stood up and gave Mrs. Figg his chair, conjuring a second one for himself.**

**'Full name?' said Fudge loudly, when Mrs. Figg had perched herself nervously on the very edge of her seat.**

**'Arabella Doreen Figg,' said Mrs. Figg in her quavery voice.**

"So she is the one Dumbledore mentioned in the last book!" exclaimed Peter. The others gave him odd looks, because it wasn't important.

**'And who exactly are you?' said Fudge, in a bored and lofty voice.**

**'I'm a resident of Little Whinging, close to where Harry Potter lives,' said Mrs. Figg.**

**'We have no record of any witch or wizard living in Little Whinging, other than Harry Potter,' said Madam Bones at once. 'That situation has always been closely monitored, given… given past events.'**

"She's a Squib, and I don't see why the Ministry wouldn't have her registered!" snapped Lily. "They have rights too! I can understand why Filch is so mean to the students."

**'I'm a Squib,' said Mrs. Figg. 'So you wouldn't have me registered, would you?'**

**'A Squib, eh?' said Fudge, eyeing her closely. 'We'll be checking that. You'll leave details of your parentage with my assistant Weasley. Incidentally, can Squibs see Dementors?' he added, looking left and right along the bench.**

**'Yes, we can!' said Mrs. Figg indignantly.**

"I hope she's telling the truth," stated Remus.

**Fudge looked back down at her, his eyebrows raised. 'Very well,' he said aloofly. 'What is your story?'**

**'I had gone out to buy cat food from the corner shop at the end of Wisteria Walk, around about nine o'clock, on the evening of the second of August,' gabbled Mrs. Figg at once, as though she had learned what she was saying by heart, 'when I heard a disturbance down the alleyway between Magnolia Crescent and Wisteria Walk. On approaching the mouth of the alleyway I saw Dementors running -'**

"Dementors don't run," said Sirius. "They glide. Or sort of float in the air."

**'Running?' said Madam Bones sharply. 'Dementors don't run, they glide.'**

**'That's what I meant to say,' said Mrs. Figg quickly, patches of pink appearing in her withered cheeks. 'Gliding along the alley towards what looked like two boys.'**

**'What did they look like?' said Madam Bones, narrowing her eyes so that the edge of the monocle disappeared into her flesh.**

**'Well, one was very large and the other one rather skinny -'**

**'No, no,' said Madam Bones impatiently. 'The Dementors… describe them.'**

**'Oh,' said Mrs. Figg, the pink flush creeping up her neck now. 'They were big. Big and wearing cloaks.'**

"Okay," said James slowly. "It sounds like to me that Squibs can't really see Dementors and all that Mrs. Figg saw at most would be a picture of them. This isn't good"

**Harry felt a horrible sinking in the pit of his stomach. Whatever Mrs. Figg might say, it sounded to him as though the most she had ever seen was a picture of a Dementor, and a picture could never convey the truth of what these beings were like: the eerie way they moved, hovering inches over the ground; or the rotting smell of them; or that terrible rattling noise they made as they sucked on the surrounding air…**

They all shuddered.

**In the second row, a dumpy wizard with a large black moustache leaned close to whisper in the ear of his neighbour, a frizzy-haired witch. She smirked and nodded.**

"It sounds like they don't believe Mrs. Figg," said Peter.

**'Big and wearing cloaks,' repeated Madam Bones coolly, while Fudge snorted derisively. 'I see. Anything else?'**

**'Yes,' said Mrs. Figg. 'I felt them. Everything went cold, and this was a very warm summer's night, mark you. And I felt… as though all happiness had gone from the world… and I remembered… dreadful things…'**

"Well, she described the effects of a Dementor accurately," said Lily brightly.

**Her voice shook and died.  
Madam Bones's eyes widened slightly. Harry could see red marks under her eyebrow where the monocle had dug into it.**

**'What did the Dementors do?' she asked, and Harry felt a rush of hope.**

"Good," said Sirius. "It looks like Amelia believes what happened."

**'They went for the boys,' said Mrs. Figg, her voice stronger and more confident now, the pink flush ebbing away from her face. 'One of them had fallen. The other was backing away, trying to repel the Dementor. That was Harry. He tried twice and produced only silver vapour. On the third attempt, he produced a Patronus, which charged down the first Dementor and then, with his encouragement, chased the second one away from his cousin. And that that is what happened,' Mrs. Figg finished, somewhat lamely.**

"Well, her testimony was accurate," said Remus. "Now let's just hope the majority of the Wizengamot believe it."

**Madam Bones looked down at Mrs. Figg in silence. Fudge was not looking at her at all, but fidgeting with his papers. Finally, he raised his eyes and said, rather aggressively, 'That's what you saw, is it?'**

**'That is what happened,' Mrs. Figg repeated.**

**'Very well,' said Fudge. 'You may go.'**

**Mrs. Figg cast a frightened look from Fudge to Dumbledore, then got up and shuffled off towards the door. Harry heard it thud shut behind her.**

**'Not a very convincing witness,' said Fudge loftily.**

"But Mrs. Figg described the effects of a Dementor attack accurately!" protested Lily. "And she was teliing the truth! Well, except maybe the part about Squibs being able to see Dementors."

**'Oh, I don't know,' said Madam Bones, in her booming voice. 'She certainly described the effects of a Dementor attack very accurately. And I can't imagine why she would say they were there if they weren't.'**

**'But Dementors wandering into a Muggle suburb and just happening to come across a wizard?' snorted Fudge. 'The odds on that must be very, very long. Even Bagman wouldn't have bet -'**

"Voldemort must have sent the Dementors," said James, ignoring Peter's flinch.

**'Oh, I don't think any of us believe the Dementors were there by coincidence,' said Dumbledore lightly.**

**The witch sitting to the right of Fudge, with her face in shadow, moved slightly but everyone else was quite still and silent.**

**'And what is that supposed to mean?' Fudge asked icily.**

**'It means that I think they were ordered there,' said Dumbledore.**

"We agree," said Sirius.

**'I think we might have a record of it if someone had ordered a pair of Dementors to go strolling through Little Whanging!' barked Fudge.**

**'Not if the Dementors are taking orders from someone other than the Ministry of Magic these days,' said Dumbledore calmly. 'I have already given you my views on this matter, Cornelius.'**

**'Yes, you have,' said Fudge forcefully, 'and I have no reason to believe that your views are anything other than bilge, Dumbledore. The Dementors remain in place in Azkaban and are doing everything we ask them to.'**

"Maybe they are for now," said Remus. "But they will eventuallly join Voldemort, because he has more to offer them! Peter, will you please stop flinching every time someone says his name? We can't say Moldywart all the time."

**'Then,' said Dumbledore, quietly but clearly, 'we must ask ourselves why somebody within the Ministry ordered a pair of Dementors into that alleyway on the second of August.'**

"But who in the Ministry would do such a thing?" asked Peter. "Unless there's someone who wants to get Harry expelled from Hogwarts."

**In the complete silence that greeted these words, the witch to the right of Fudge leaned forwards so that Harry saw her for the first time.**

**He thought she looked just like a large, pale toad. She was rather squat with a broad, flabby face, as little neck as Uncle Vernon and a very wide, slack mouth. Her eyes were large, round and slightly bulging. Even the little black velvet bow perched on top of her short curly hair put him in mind of a large fly she was about to catch in a long sticky tongue.**

They all made faces. "I don't envy anyone with those looks," said Lily. "She probably got a lot of teasing as 'Toad Girl' or whatever at school."

**'The Chair recognises Dolores Jane Umbridge, Senior Undersecretary to the Minister' said Fudge.**

**The witch spoke in a fluttery, girlish, high-pitched voice that took Harry aback; he had been expecting a croak.**

"We had too," said Sirius, snickering.

**'I'm sure I must have misunderstood you, Professor Dumbledore,' she said, with a simper that left her big, round eyes as cold as ever. 'So silly of me. But it sounded for a teensy moment as though you were suggesting that the Ministry of Magic had ordered an attack on this boy!'**

"Why is Umbridge talking like she speaking to a six-year old?" asked James.

**She gave a silvery laugh that made the hairs on the back of Harry's neck stand up. A few other members of the Wizengamot laughed with her. It could not have been plainer that not one of them was really amused.**

**'If it is true that the Dementors are taking orders only from the Ministry of Magic, and it is also true that two Dementors attacked Harry and his cousin a week ago, then it follows logically that somebody at the Ministry might have ordered the attacks,' said Dumbledore politely. **

"Yeah, Dumbledore's right," said Peter.

**'Of course, these particular Dementors may have been outside Ministry control -'**

**'There are no Dementors outside Ministry control!' snapped Fudge, who had turned brick red.**

"I hope so," said Remus, looking unhappy.

**Dumbledore inclined his head in a little bow.**

**'Then undoubtedly the Ministry will be making a full inquiry into why two Dementors were so very far from Azkaban and why they atacked without authorisation.'**

**'It is not for you to decide what the Ministry of Magic does or does not do, Dumbledore!' snapped Fudge, now a shade of magenta of which Uncle Vernon would have been proud.**

**'Of course it isn't,' said Dumbledore mildly. 'I was merely expressing my confidence that this matter will not go uninvestigated.'**

**He glanced at Madam Bones, who readjusted her monocle and stared back at him, frowning slightly.**

"Well, Amelia sounds as if she taking this matter seriously," said James.

**'I would remind everybody that the behaviour of these Dementors, if indeed they are not figments of this boy's imagination, is not the subject of this hearing!' said Fudge. 'We are here to examine Harry Potter's offences under the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery!'**

**'Of course we are,' said Dumbledore, 'but the presence of Dementors in that alleyway is highly relevant. Clause Seven of the Decree states that magic may be used before Muggles in exceptional circumstances, and as those exceptional circumstances include situations which threaten the life of the wizard or witch him- or herself, or any witches, wizards or Muggles present at the time of the -'**

**'We are familiar with Clause Seven, thank you very much!' snarled Fudge.**

**'Of course you are,' said Dumbledore courteously. 'Then we are in agreement that Harrys use of the Patronus Charm in these circumstances falls precisely into the category of excptional circumstances the clause describes?'**

**'If there were Dementors, which I doubt.'**

"There really were!" snapped Lily angrily. "You even heard from Mrs. Figg, backing up Harry's story!"

**'You have heard it from an eyewitness,' Dumbledore interrupted. 'If you still doubt her truthfulness, call her back, question her again. I am sure she would not object.'**

**'I - that - not -' blustered Fudge, fiddling with the papers before him. 'It's - I want this over with today, Dumbledore!'**

**'But naturally, you would not care how many times you heard from a witness, if the alternative was a serious miscarriage of justice,' said Dumbledore.**

**'Serious miscarriage, my hat!' said Fudge at the top of his voice. 'Have you ever bothered to tot up the number of cock-and-bull stories this boy has come out with, Dumbledore, while trying to cover up his flagrant misuse of magic out of school? I suppose you've forgotten the Hover Charm he used three years ago -'**

"Harry didn't do it!" shouted Sirius. "That was Dobby the house-elf!"

**'That wasn't me, it was a house-elf!' said Harry.**

**'YOU SEE?' roared Fudge, gesturing flamboyantly in Harry's direction. 'A house-elf! In a Muggle house! I ask you.'**

**'The house-elf in question is currently in the employ of Hogwarts School,' said Dumbledore. 'I can summon him here in an instant to give evidence if you wish.'**

**'I - not - I haven't got time to listen to house-elves! Anyway, that's not the only - he blew up his aunt, for God's sake!' Fudge shouted, banging his fist on the judge's bench and upsetting a bottle of ink.**

"But that was because Harry lost his temper!" yelled Peter. "And you let him off!"

**'And you very kindly did not press charges on that occasion, accepting, I presume, that even the best wizards cannot always control their emotions,' said Dumbledore calmly, as Fudge attempted to scrub the ink off his notes.**

**'And I haven't even started on what he gets up to at school-'**

"But the Ministry can't punish students over what they do at school!" protested Remus. "Only the Hogwarts staff can!"

**'But, as the Ministry has no authority to punish Hogwarts students for misdemeanours at school, Harry's behaviour there is not relevant to this hearing,' said Dumbledore, as politely as ever, but now with a suggestion of coolness behind his words.**

**'Oho!' said Fudge. 'Not our business what he does at school, eh? You think so?'**

"The Ministry doesn't have the power to expel students or interfere in what they do at Hogwartys!" snapped Lily. "What is the matter with you, Fudge?"  
Sirius added to his miscellaneous list and commented, "If Fudge keeps this up, I may have to start a list just for him."

**'The Ministry does not have the power to expel Hogwarts students, Cornelius, as I reminded you on the night of the second of August,' said Dumbledore. 'Nor does it have the right to confiscate wands until charges have been successfully proven; again, as  
I reminded you on the night of the second of August. In your admirable haste to ensure that the law is upheld, you appear, inadvertently I am sure, to have overlooked a few laws yourself.'**

"It looks like it," said James darkly.

**'Laws can be changed,' said Fudge savagely.**

**'Of course they can,' said Dumbledore, inclining his head. 'And you certainly seem to be making many changes, Cornelius. Why, in the few short weeks since I was asked to leave the Wizengamot, it has already become the practice to hold a full criminal trial to deal with a simple matter of underage magic!'**

"_What_?!" demanded Remus incredulously. "So Fudge is the one responsible for Harry's hearing to be changed from just having Amelis Bones be in charge of it."

**A few of the wizards above them shifted uncomfortably in their seats. Fudge turned a slightly deeper shade of puce. The toadlike witch on his right, however, merely gazed at Dumbledore, her face quite expressionless.**

**'As far as I am aware,' Dumbledore continued, 'there is no law yet in place that says this court's job is to punish Harry for every bit of magic he has ever performed. He has been charged with a specific offence and he has presented his defence. All he and I can do now is to await your verdict.'**

"And that verdict had better be Harry being found inncoent," said Peter flatly.

**Dumbledore put his fingertips together again and said no more. Fudge glared at him, evidently incensed. Harry glanced sideways at Dumbledore, seeking reassurance; he was not at all sure that Dumbledore was right in telling the Wizengamot, in effect, that it was about time they made a decision. Again, however, Dumbledore seemed oblivious to Harry's attempt to catch his eye. He continued to look up at the benches where the entire Wizengamot had fallen into urgent, whispered conversations.**

**Harry looked at his feet. His heart, which seemed to have swollen to an unnatural size, was thumping loudly under his ribs. **

"Poor Harry," said Lily. "I wish I could be there for him."

**He had expected the hearing to last longer than this. He was not at all sure that he had made a good impression. He had not really said very much. He ought to have explained more fully about the Dementors, about how he had fallen over, about how both he and Dudley had nearly been kissed…**

"It wouldn't do you much good where Fudge is concerned," said Sirius darkly. "He'd be convinced that you were making this all up."

**Twice he looked up at Fudge and opened his mouth to speak, but his swollen heart was now constricting his air passages and both times he merely took a deep breath and looked back down at his shoes.**

"Speaking now wouldn't do you much good," said James sadly.

**Then the whispering stopped. Harry wanted to look up at the judges, but found that it was really much, much easier to examining his laces.**

**"Those in favor of clearing the witness of all charges?" said Madam Bones's booming voice.**

**Harry's head jerked upward. There were hands in the air, many of them... more than half! **

They all burst into spontaneous cheers. "The majority thinks that Harry's innocent!" exclaimed Peter happily.

**Breathing very fast, he tried to count, but before he could finish Madam Bones had said, "And those in favor of conviction?"**

**Fudge raised his hand; **

"I thought he would," said Remus disgustedly.

**so did half a dozen others, including the witch on his right and the heavily mustached wizard and the frizzy-haired witch in the second row.**

**Fudge glanced around at them all, looking as though there was something large stuck in his throat, then lowered his own hand. He took two deep breaths and then said, in a voice distorted by suppressed rage, "Very well, very well ... cleared of all charges."**

They all cheered again.

**"Excellent," said Dumbledore briskly, spinging to his feet, pulling out his wand, and causing the two chintz armchairs to vanish. "Well, I must be getting along. Good day to you all."**

**And without looking once at Harry, he swept from the dungeon.**

"Why didn't Dumbledore say something to Harry?" asked Peter.

"He probably didn't want to in front of the Wizengamot," answered Lily.

"But he could have still given Harry a look or something," protested Sirius.

Remus shrugged. "Dumbledore must have his reasons for not looking at Harry. Anyway, the chapter's over."

"I'll read next," volunteered James. He took the book from Remus.


	9. The Woes of Mrs Weasley

**CHAPTER NINE  
The Woes of Mrs. Weasely**

They all looked confused by this chapter title. "What happens to Molly?" asked Sirius. "Why would she have woes?"

"Maybe something going on the war affected her," suggested Remus.

**Dumbledore's abrupt departure took Harry completely by surprise. He remained sitting where he was in the chained chair, struggling with his feelings of shock and relief. The Wizengamot were all getting to their feet, talking, gathering up their papers and packing them away. Harry stood up. Nobody seemed to be paying him the slightest bit of attention, except the toadlike witch on Fudge's right, who was now gazing down at him instead of at Dumbledore. **

"Why do I have the feeling that she'll be important later on?" asked James.

"I do too," said Lily. "Let's just hope she doesn't turn out to be the Defense Against Dark Arts teacher or something."

"Why?" asked Peter. "I mean, I know she doesn't sound very nice, but why would she be the Defense teacher?"

"Maybe because Harry has met, or in Moody's case, heard about, his Defense teachers before the school term had actually started," answered Remus. "Just look. Harry met Quirrell in the Leaky Cauldron, Lockhart at Flourish and Blotts, me on the Hogwarts Express, and heard about Moody at the Weasley's house."

"So that means Harry will meet or hear about the new Defense teacher before term starts, then," concluded Peter.

**Ignoring her, he tried to catch Fudge's eye, or Madam Bones's, wanting to ask whether he was free to go, but Fudge seemed quite determined not to notice Harry, and Madam Bones was busy with her briefcase, so he took a few tentative steps towards the exit and, when nobody called him back, broke into a very fast walk.**

**He took the last few steps at a run, wrenched open the door and almost collided with Mr. Weasley, who was standing right outside, looking pale and apprehensive.**

**"Dumbledore didn't say ‐"**

"Harry's cleared!" exclaimed James happily. They all cheered again.

**"Cleared," Harry said, pulling the door closed behind him, "of all charges!"**

**Beaming, Mr. Weasley seized Harry by the shoulders.**

**"Harry, that's wonderful! Well, of course, they couldn't have found you guilty, not on the evidence, but even so, I can't pretend I wasn't ‐"**

**But Mr. Weasley broke off, because the courtroom door had just opened again. The Wizengamot were filing out.**

**"Merlin's beard!" exclaimed Mr. Weasley wonderingly, pulling Harry aside to let them all pass. "You were tried by the full court?"**

"Looks like it," said Sirius darkly. "I wonder what Fudge was playing at."

**"I think so," said Harry quietly.**

**One or two of the wizards nodded to Harry as they passed and a few, including Madam Bones, said, "Morning, Arthur," to Mr. Weasley, but most averted their eyes. Cornelius Fudge and the toadlike witch were almost the last to leave the dungeon. Fudge acted as though Mr. Weasley and Harry were part of the wall, but again, the witch looked almost appraisingly at Harry as she passed. Last of all to pass was Percy. Like Fudge, he completely ignored his father and Harry; he marched past clutching a large roll of parchment and a handful of spare quills, his back rigid and his nose in the air. **

"I just thought of something," said Lily suddenly. "What if Percy's only pretending? Dumbledore might have asked him to stage the seperation from his family so Fudge will think Percy's on his side, but in reality, Percy would be using his position at the Ministry to bring Dumbledore information."

"Good point, Lily," said James. "I did find it hard to believe that Percy could turn on his family like that, even if he is ambitious. Having one Crouch is enough."

**The lines around Mr. Weasley's mouth tightened slightly, but other than this he gave no sign that he had seen his third son.**

**"I'm going to take you straight back so you can tell the others the good news," he said, beckoning Harry forwards as Percy's heels disappeared up the steps to Level Nine. "I'll drop you off on the way to that toilet in Bethnal Green. Come on- "**

**"So, what will you have to do about the toilet?" Harry asked, grinning. Everything suddenly seemed five times funnier than usual. It was starting to sink in: he was cleared, he was going back to Hogwarts.**

"Yeah," said Sirius grinning. "We knew that you had to be cleared or the rest of the book would have no point, but there was that tiny bit of doubt..."

**"Oh, its a simple enough anti-jinx," said Mr. Weasley as they mounted the stairs, "but it's not so much having to repair the damage, its more the attitude behind the vandalism, Harry. Muggle-baiting might strike some wizards as funny, but it's an expression of something much deeper and nastier, and I for one -"**

**Mr. Weasley broke off in mid-sentence. They had just reached the ninth-level corridor and Cornelius Fudge was standing a few feet away from them, talking quietly to a tall man with sleek blond hair and a pointed, pale face.**

"Lucius Malfoy!" growled Sirius.

"What's he doing at the Ministry?" demanded Peter. "And with the Minister?"

**The second man turned at the sound of their footsteps. He, too, broke off in mid-conversation, his cold grey eyes narrowed and fixed upon Harry's face.**

**'Well, well, well- Patronus Potter,' said Lucius Malfoy coolly.**

"Oh!" exclaimed Lily. "I'm tempted to strangle him! He was there in that graveyard, after all!"

**Harry felt winded, as though he had just walked into something solid. He had last seen those cold grey eyes through slits in a Death Eater's hood, and last heard that man's voice jeering in a dark graveyard while Lord Voldemort tortured him. Harry could not believe that Lucius Malfoy dared look him in the face; he could not believe that he was here, in the Ministry of Magic, or that Cornelius Fudge was talking to him, when Harry had told Fudge mere weeks ago that Malfoy was a Death Eater.**

"Well, Fudge is not going to believe that Malfoy is a Death Eater!" snapped Remus. "Especially considering the bribes and donations to charitable causes Malfoy would have given."

**'The Minister was just telling me about your lucky escape, Potter,' drawled Mr. Malfoy. 'Quite astonishing, the way you continue to wriggle out of very tight holes- snakelike, in fact.'**

"IT IS NOT SNAKELIKE!" shouted James. "A lion can beat a snake any time!"

**Mr. Weasley gripped Harry's shoulder in warning.**

**'Yeah,' said Harry, 'yeah, I'm good at escaping.'**

**Lucius Malfoy raised his eyes to Mr. Weasley's face.**

**'And Arthur Weasley too! What are you doing here, Arthur?'**

"He works at the Ministry!" snapped Peter.

**'I work here,' said Mr Weasley curtly.**

**'Not here, surely?' said Mr. Malfoy, raising his eyebrows and glancing towards the door over Mr. Weasley's shoulder. 'I thought you were up on the second floor- don't you do something that involves sneaking Muggle artefacts home and bewitching them?'**

"Oh, if I get my hands on that dratted Lucius Malfoy!" spat Lily. Sirius was busily writing away on his Malfoy list, while James jotted down some good hexes and pranks to do on Malfoy.

**'No,' Mr. Weasley snapped, his fingers now biting into Harry's shoulder.**

**'What are you doing here, anyway?' Harry asked Lucius Malfoy.**

**'I don't think private matters between myself and the Minister are any concern of yours, Potter,' said Malfoy, smoothing the front of his robes. Harry distinctly heard the gentle clinking of what sounded like a full pocket of gold. **

"Bribes!" spat Sirius. "Or to be more accurate, 'donations' to the Ministry."

**'Really, just because you are Dumbledore's favourite boy, you must not expect the same indulgence from the rest of us- shall we go up to your office, then, Minister?'**

**'Certainly,' said Fudge, turning his back on Harry and Mr. Weasley. 'This way, Lucius.'**

**They strode off together, talking in low voices. Mr. Weasley did not let go of Harry's shoulder until they had disappeared into the lift.**

**"Why wasn't he waiting outside Fudge's office if they've got business to do together?" Harry burst out furiously. "What was he doing down here?"**

"Probably trying to sneak down to the courtroom and find out the outcome, I bet," said Remus.

**"Trying to sneak down to the courtroom, if you ask me,' said Mr. Weasley, looking extremely agitated and glancing over his shoulder as though making sure they could not be overheard. "Trying to find out whether you'd been expelled or not. I'll leave a note for Dumbledore when I drop you off, he ought to know Malfoy's been talking to Fudge again."**

**"What private business have they got together, anyway?"**

"'Donations' to the Ministry, of course," said James angrily.

**"Gold, I expect," said Mr. Weasley angrily. "Malfoy's been giving generously to all sorts of things for years - gets him in with the right people - then he can ask favours - delay laws he doesn't want passed - oh, he's very well-connected, Lucius Malfoy."**

"He doesn't deserve to be so well-connected," said Sirius angrily.

**The lift arrived; it was empty except for a flock of memos that flapped around Mr. Weasley's head as he pressed the button for the Atrium and the doors clanged shut. He waved them away irritably.**

**"Mr. Weasley," said Harry slowly, "if Fudge is meeting Death Eaters like Malfoy, if he's seeing them alone, how do we know they haven't put the Imperius Curse on him?"**

**"Don't think it hasn't occurred to us, Harry," said Mr. Weasley quietly. "But Dumbledore thinks Fudge is acting of his own accord at the moment - **

"It's still doesn't do the Order any good," pointed out Peter.

**which, as Dumbledore says, is not a lot of comfort. Best not talk about it any more just now, Harry."**

**The doors slid open and they stepped out into the now almost deserted Atrium. Eric the watchwizard was hidden behind his Daily Prophet again. They had walked straight past the golden fountain before Harry remembered.**

**"Wait -" he told Mr. Weasley, and, pulling his moneybag from his pocket, he turned back to the fountain.**

**He looked up into the handsome wizard's face, but close-to Harry thought he looked rather weak and foolish. The witch was wearing a vapid smile like a beauty contestant, and from what Harry knew of goblins and centaurs, they were most unlikely to be caught staring so soppily at humans of any description. **

"Yeah," said Lily. "They wouldn't. That fountain really out to be changed."

**Only the house-elf's attitude of creeping servility looked convincing. With a grin at the thought of what Hermione would say if she could see the statue of the elf, Harry turned his moneybag upside-down and emptied not just ten Galleons, but the whole contents into the pool.**

"Well, that was nice of Harry," said Remus.

**"I knew it!" yelled Ron, punching the air. "You always get away with stuff!"**

**"They were bound to clear you," said Hermione, who had looked positively faint with anxiety when Harry had entered the kitchen and was now holding a shaking hand over her eys, "there was no case against you, none at all."**

**"Everyone seems quite relieved, though, considering you all knew I'd get off," said Harry, smiling.**

"There was always that doubt that you wouldn't," said James.

**Mrs. Weasley was wiping her face on her apron, and Fred, George and Ginny were doing a kind of war dance to a chant that went: "He got off, he got off, he got off -"**

They all laughed at the twins and Giny's antics.

**"That's enough! Settle down!" shouted Mr. Weasley, though he too was smiling. "Listen, Sirius, Lucius Malfoy was at the Ministry -"**

**"What?" said Sirius sharply.**

**"He got off, he got off, he got off- "**

**"Be quiet, you three! Yes, we saw him talking to Fudge on Level Nine, then they went up to Fudge's office together. Dumbledore ought to know."**

"Yes, he should," said Peter.

**"Absolutely," said Sirius. "We'll tell him, don't worry."**

**"Well, I'd better get going, there's a vomiting toilet waiting for me in Bethnal Green. Molly, I'll be late, I'm covering for Tonks, but Kingsley might be dropping in for dinner -"**

**"He got off, he got off, he got off -"**

**"That's enough - Fred - George - Ginny!" said Mrs. Weasley, as Mr. Weasley left the kitchen. "Harry, dear, come and sit down, have some lunch, you hardly ate breakfast."**

"Yes," said Lily in a motherly manner. "Eat up, Harry. You're far too thin, and my dratted sister doesn't help matters any."

**Ron and Hermione sat themselves down opposite him, looking happier than they had done since he had first arrived at Grimmauld Place, and Harry's feeling of giddy relief, which had been somewhat dented by his encounter with Lucius Malfoy, swelled again. The gloomy house seemed warmer and more welcoming all of a sudden; even Kreacher looked less ugly as he poked his snoutlike nose into the kitchen to investigate the source of all the noise.**

**"Course, once Dumbledore turned up on your side, there was no way they were going to convict you," said Ron happily, now dishing great mounds of mashed potato on to everyone's plates.**

**"Yeah, he swung it for me," said Harry. He felt it would sound highly ungrateful, not to mention childish, to say, "I wish he'd talked to me, though. Or even looked at me."**

"Yes, it would be," said Remus. "But on the other hand, you have a point, Harry. Dumbledore should have at least looked at you, not ignored you."

**And as he thought this, the scar on his forehead burned so badly that he clapped his hand to it.**

**"What's up?" said Hermione, looking alarmed.**

**"Scar," Harry mumbled. "But it's nothing- it happens all the time now -"**

"But it's still not good news," said Sirius, anxious about his godson.

**None of the others had noticed a thing; all of them were now helping themselves to food while gloating over Harry's narrow escape; Fred, George and Ginny were still singing. Hermione looked rather anxious, but before she could say anything, Ron had said happily, "I bet Dumbledore turns up this evening, to celebrate with us, you know."**

**"I don't think he'll be able to, Ron," said Mrs. Weasley, setting a huge plate of roast chicken down in front of Harry. "He's really very busy at the moment."**

**"HE GOT OFF, HE GOT OFF, HE GOT OFF-"**

**"SHUT UP!" roared Mrs. Weasley.**

They all burst into laughter again.

**Over the next few days Harry could not help noticing that there was one person within number twelve, Grimmauld Place, who did not seem wholly overjoyed that he would be returning to Hogwarts. Sirius had put up a very good show of happiness on first hearing the news, wringing Harry's hand and beaming just  
like the rest of them. Soon, however, he was moodier and surlier than before, talking less to everybody, even Harry, and spending increasing amounts of time shut up in his mother's room with Buckbeak.**

They all turned to look at Sirius, who was looking bewildered himself. "I'm glad that Harry got off, so how come the future me isn't so happy about it?"

"Maybe you had gotten your hopes up about Harry living with you," suggested Remus.

**"Don't you go feeling guilty!" said Hermione sternly, after Harry had confided some of his feelings to her and Ron while they scrubbed out a mouldy cupboard on the third floor a fe days later. "You belong at Hogwarts and Sirius knows it. Personally, I think he's being selfish."**

James looked startled. "Selfish? I can't think of a time when Sirius was selfish."

**"That's a bit harsh, Hermione," said Ron, frowning as he attempted to prise off a bit of mould that had attached itself firmly to his finger, "you wouldn't want to be stuck inside this house without any company."**

"But Sirius has company," pointed out Peter. "The Order members drop by, as it's Headquarters. And Remus is living there."

**"He'll have company!" said Hermione. "It's Headquarters to the Order of the Phoenix, isn't it? He just got his hopes up that Harry would be coming to live here with him."**

**"I don't think that's true," said Harry, wringing out his cloth. "He wouldn't give me a straight answer when I asked him if I could."**

"Well, Sirius probably didn't want to get his hopes on even more," said Lily, looking at Sirius, who looked annoyed with himself. "Or maybe Dumbledore is the one to decide where Harry lives."

**"He just didn't want to get his own hopes up even more," said Hermione wisely. "And he probably felt a bit guilty himself, because I think a part of him was really hoping you'd be expelled. Then you'd both be outcasts together."**

**"Come off it!" said Harry and Ron together, but Hermione merely shrugged.**

**"Suit yourselves. But I sometimes think Ron's mum's right and Sirius gets confused about whether you're you or your father, Harry."**

**"So you think he's touched in the head?" said Harry heatedly.**

**"No, I just think he's been very lonely for a long time," said Hermione simply.**

Sirius opened his mouth to protest, then shut it. After a minute, he said, "Hermione has a point. I probably do see James in Harry. And I guess a part of me really did want Harry to be able to live with me, in the future."

**At this point, Mrs. Weasley entered the bedroom behind them.**

**"Still not finished?" she said, poking her head into the cupboard.**

**"I thought you might be here to tell us to have a break!" said Ron bitterly. "D'you know how much mould we've got rid of since we arrived here?"**

**"You were so keen to help the Order," said Mrs. Weasley, "you can do your bit by making Headquarters fit to live in."**

**"I feel like a house-elf," grumbled Ron.**

**"Well, now you understand what dreadful lives they lead, perhaps you'll be a bit more active in SPEW!" said Hermione hopefully, as Mrs. Weasley left them to it. "You know, maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to show people exactly how horrible it is to clean all the time - we could do a sponsored scrub of Gryffindor common room, all proceeds to SPEW, it would raise awareness as well as funds."**

"Nobody is going to go for it," said Remus, shaking his head. "And the house-elves would be insulted. Or think that they weren't doing a proper job themsleves."

**"I'll sponsor you to shut up about SPEW," Ron muttered irritably, but only so Harry could hear him.**

**Harry found himself daydreaming about Hogwarts more and more as the end of the holidays approached; he could not wait to see Hagrid again, to play Quidditch, even to stroll across the vegetable patches to the Herbology greenhouses; it would be a treat just to leave this dusty, musty house, where half of the cupboards were still bolted shut and Kreacher wheezed insults out of the shadows as you passed, though Harry was careful not to say any of this within earshot of Sirius.**

"Ah," said James. "Things have gotten boring at Headquarters."

"Well. duh!" snapped Sirius. "I got bored after five minutes of being at Grimmauld Place and counted the days until I could leave to spend the rest of the summer with your family, James."

**The fact was that living at the Headquarters of the anti-Voldemort movement was not nearly as interesting or exciting as Harry would have expected before he'd experienced it. Though members of the Order of the Phoenix came and went regularly, sometimes staying for meals, sometimes only for a few minutes of whispered conversation, Mrs. Weasley made sure that Harry and the others were kept well out of earshot (whether Extendable or normal) and nobody, not even Sirius, seemed to feel that Harry needed to know anything more than he had heard on the night of his arrival.**

"Darn!" said Peter. "It would be nice to get some more information."

**On the very last day of the holidays Harry was sweeping up Hedwig's owl droppings from the top of the wardrobe when Ron entered heir bedroom carrying a couple of envelopes.**

**"Booklists have arrived," he said, throwing one of the envelopes up to Harry, who was standing on a chair. "About time, I thought they'd forgotten, they usually come much earlier than this- "**

**Harry swept the last of the droppings into a rubbish bag and threw the bag over Ron's head into the wastepaper basket in the corner, which swallowed it and belched loudly. He then opened his letter. It contained two pieces of parchment: one the usual reminder that term started on the first of September; the other telling him which books he would need for the coming year.**

**"Only two new ones," he said, reading the list, _The Standard Book of Spells, Grade 5_, by Miranda Goshawk, and _Defensive Magical Theory_, by Wilbert Slinkhard."**

"Theory?" asked Lily, frowning. "It looks like the new Defense Against Dark Arts teacher won't be teaching very much in the way of practical stuff. Not like Remus or the fake Moody."

**Crack.  
Fred and George Apparated right beside Harry. He was so used to them doing this by now that he didn't even fall off his chair.**

**"We were just wondering who set the Slinkhard book," said Fred conversationally.**

**"Because it means Dumbledore's found a new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher," said George.**

**"And about time too," said Fred.**

**"What d'you mean?" Harry asked, jumping down beside them.**

**"Well, we overheard Mum and Dad talking on the Extendable Ears a few weeks back," Fred told Harry, "and from what they were saying, Dumbledore was having real trouble finding anyone to do the job this year."**

"Considering what happened to the last four, it's to be expected," said Peter.

**"Not surprising, is it, when you look at what's happened to the last four?" said George.**

**"One sacked, one dead, one's memory removed and one locked in a trunk for nine months," said Harry, counting them off on his fingers. "Yeah, I see what you mean."**

**"What's up with you, Ron?" asked Fred.**

**Ron did not answer. Harry looked round. Ron was standing very still with his mouth slightly open, gaping at his letter from Hogwarts.**

"Why would he be gaping?" asked James. "Did he get some news?"

"Well, it is Harry and Ron's fifth year," said Remus.

James still looked confused, so Lily clarified, "That's when the new prefects get chosen, James!"

**"What's the matter?" said Fred impatiently, moving around Ron to look over his shoulder at the parchment.**

**Fred's mouth fell open, too.**

**"Prefect?" he said, staring incredulously at the letter. "Prefect?"**

"_Ron_ got prefect?" they all asked incredulously.

"This is ... unexpected," said Peter finally.

"That's an understatement," said Remus. "I thought Harry might get the prefect job."

James looked slightly horrified. "The son of a Marauder become a prefect? The very idea!"

"Well, apparently you become Head Boy next year, so you can't talk, Prongs," said Sirius.

"And Remus is a prefect, and he's a Marauder," pointed out Lily.

"But - but - that's different!" protested James. "And Remus is the good one, so of course he was going to get the badge!"

Remus gave a wry smile. "And probably because Dumbledore hoped I could exercise some control over you and Padfoot. Of course, I've failed miserably so far. And might I remind you that you and Padfoot teased me quite a bit after you found out I was made prefect, Prongs?"

**George leapt forwards, seized the envelope in Ron's other hand and turned it upside-down. Harry saw something scarlet and gold fall into George's palm.**

**"No way," said George in a hushed voice.**

**"There's been a mistake," said Fred, snatching the letter out of Ron's grasp and holding it up to the light as though checking for a watermark. "No one in their right mind would make Ron a prefect."**

"Well, that's not exactly true," said Lily. "Ron has done some good stuff, and being a prefect would be good for him."

"And since Hermione's bound to be made a prefect as well, they can spend time alone," pointed out Sirius. "It's obvious to me that they have feelings for each other, though they don't quite know it yet, and patrolling together might make them realize it."

**The twins' heads turned in unison and both of them stared at Harry.**

**"We thought you were a cert!" said Fred, in a tone that suggested Harry had tricked them in some way.**

"Well, it is true that Harry was the more likely candidate to be made prefect," said Peter.

**"We thought Dumbledore was bound to pick you!" said George indignantly.**

**"Winning the Triwizard and everything!" said Fred.**

**"I suppose all the mad stuff must've counted against him," said George to Fred.**

**"Yeah," said Fred slowly. "Yeah, you've caused too much trouble, mate. Well, at least one of you's got their priorities right."**

"This is a quandry," said James. "Part of me is glad that as the son of a Marauder, he's not a prefect. But another part of me isn't happy at all about it. With all the stuff he's done, Harry seems the obvious choice as the new Gryffindor prefect. But I guess if it can't be Harry, Ron's the best choice."

**He strode over to Harry and clapped him on the back while giving Ron a scathing look.**

**"Prefect- ickle Ronnie the Prefect."**

**"Ohh, Mum's going to be revolting," groaned George, thrusting the prefect badge back at Ron as though it might contaminate him.**

**Ron, who still had not said a word, took the badge, stared at it for a moment, then held it out to Harry as though asking mutely for confirmation that it was genuine. Harry took it. A large 'P' was superimposed on the Gryffindor lion. He had seen a badge just like this on Percy's chest on his very first day at Hogwarts.**

"Er, wasn't Percy's badge silver?" asked Sirius. "So shouldn't Harry not recognize Ron's badge?"  
"The author must have made a mistake," responded Lily.

**The door banged open. Hermione came tearing into the room, her cheeks flushed and her hair flying. There was an envelope in her hand.**

**"Did you - did you get -?"**

**She spotted the badge in Harry's hand and let out a shriek.**

**"I knew it!" she said excitedly, brandishing her letter. "Me too, Harry, me too!"**

"As we expected, Hermione's got the badge," said Remus. "But she's mistaken about Harry. Boy, is she going to get a shock when she finds out that it's Ron."

**"No," said Harry quickly, pushing the badge back into Ron's hand. "It's Ron, not me."**

**"It - what? I-"**

**"Ron's prefect, not me," Harry said.**

**"Ron?" said Hermione, her jaw dropping. "But - are you sure? I mean -"**

"She's definitely got a shock," commented Peter.

**She turned red as Ron looked round at her with a defiant expression on his face.**

**"It's my name on the letter," he said.**

**"I -" said Hermione, looking thoroughly bewildered. "I - well - wow! Well done, Ron! That's really -"**

"Unexpected," said James. "Though he is the obvious choice if Harry wasn't made prefect."

**"Unexpected," said George, nodding.**

**"No," said Hermione, blushing harder than ever, "no it's not - Ron's done loads of - he's really- "**

**The door behind her opened a little wider and Mrs. Weasley backed into the room carrying a pile of freshly laundered robes.**

"And once Molly find out about Ron, she's going to be ecstatic, to say the least," said Remus.

**"Ginny said the booklists had come at last," she said, glancing around at all the envelopes as she made her way over to the bed and started sorting the robes into two piles. "If you give them to me I'll take them over to Diagon Alley this afternoon and get your books while you're packing. Ron, I'll have to get you more pyjamas, these are at least six inches too short, I can't believe how fast you're growing - what colour would you like?"**

**"Get him red and gold to match his badge," said George, smirking.**

"So the twins are going to tell their mother about it, are they?" asked Peter.

**"Match his what?" said Mrs. Weasley absently, rolling up a pair of maroon socks and placing them on Ron's pile.**

**"His badge," said Fred, with the air of getting the worst over quickly. "His lovely shiny new prefect's badge."**

They all chuckled over this.

**Fred's words took a moment to penetrate Mrs. Weasley's preoccupation with pyjamas.**

**"His - but - Ron, you're not -?"**

**Ron held up his badge.**

**Mrs. Weasley let out a shriek just like Hermione's.**

**"I don't believe it! I don't believe it! Oh, Ron, how wonderful! A prefect! That's everyone in the family!"**

"What about Fred and George?" demanded Sirius. "Oh, and Ginny?"

**"What are Fred and I, next-door neighbours?" said George indignantly, as his mother pushed him aside and flung her arms around her youngest son.**

They chuckled over George's reply.

**"Wait until your father hears! Ron, I'm so proud of you, what wonderful news, you could end up Head Boy just like Bill and Percy, it's the first step! **

"Just as long as you turn out like Bill and not like Percy," said Lily.

**Oh, what a thing to happen in the middle of all this worry, I'm just thrilled, oh, Ronnie -"**

**Fred and George were both making loud retching noises behind her back but Mrs. Weasley did not notice; arms tight around Ron's neck, she was kissing him all over his face, which had turned a brighter scarlet than his badge.**

They laughed over Mrs. Weasley's fussing over Ron.

**"Mum don't - Mum, get a grip -" he muttered, trying to push her away.**

**She let go of him and said breathlessly, 'Well, what will it be? We gave Percy an owl, but you've already got one, of course."**

**"W-what do you mean?" said Ron, looking as though he did not dare believe his ears.**

**"You've got to have a reward for this!" said Mrs. Weasley fondly. "How about a nice new set of dress robes?"**

**"We've already bought him some," said Fred sourly, who looked as though he sincerely regretted this generosity.**

**"Or a new cauldron, Charlies old one's rusting through, or a new rat, you always liked Scabbers -"**

Peter flinched and looked embarrassed, and James said, "I really doubt Ron will be getting a rat anytime soon. He'll more likely ask for a new broom or a set of Chudley Cannon robes or something similar."

**"Mum," said Ron hopefully, "can I have a new broom?"**

**Mrs. Weasley's face fell slightly; broomsticks were expensive.**

**"Not a really good one!" Ron hastened to add. "Just - just a new one for a change -"**

**Mrs. Weasley hesitated, then smiled.**

**"Of course you can - well, I'd better get going if I've got a broom to buy too. I'll see you all later - little Ronnie, a prefect! And don't forget to pack your trunks - a prefect - oh, I'm all of a dither!"**

They all chuckled again.

**She gave Ron yet another kiss on the cheek, sniffed loudly, and bustled from the room.**

**Fred and George exchanged looks.**

**"You don't mind if we don't kiss you, do you, Ron?" said Fred in a falsely anxious voice.**

**"We could curtsey, if you like," said George.**

"Oh, those twins are hilarious!" exclaimed Sirius between fits of laughter.

"You and James acted exactly like that," snapped Remus. "You were there when my mum found out I was made prefect. She was very proud of me and after she had left the room, you began acting like that."

**"Oh, shut up," said Ron, scowling at them.**

"I told you guys to shut up as well," commented Remus.

"And I asked if you would put us in detention if we didn't," remembered Sirius. "Then you threw up your hands and said, 'Will you at least try to behave sometimes?'"

**"Or what?" said Fred, an evil grin spreading across his face. "Going to put us in detention?"**

**"I'd love to see him try," sniggered George.**

**"He could if you don't watch out!" said Hermione angrily.**

**Fred and George burst out laughing, and Ron muttered, "Drop it, Hermione."**

**"We're going to have to watch our step, George," said Fred, pretending to tremble, "with these two on our case -"**

"Will, Hermione will be on your case," said Peter. "Ron probably won't as much."

**"Yeah, it looks like our law-breaking days are finally over," said George, shaking his head.**

**And with another loud crack, the twins Disapparated.**

**"Those two!" said Hermione furiously, staring up at the ceiling, through which they could now hear Fred and George roaring with laughter in the room upstairs. "Don't pay any attention to them, Ron, they're only jealous!"**

"I doubt it," said James. "Seeing as they're like us, I don't think they could be jealous. Sirius and I weren't when Remus was made prefect. Though Mum was disappointed that I didn't get the badge and said if I had just behaved like Remus, I could have gotten it. But why take the fun out of life?"?

**"I don't think they are," said Ron doubtfully, also looking up at the ceiling. "They've always said only prats become prefects - still," he added on a happier note, "they've never had new brooms! I wish I could go with Mum and choose- she'll never be able to afford a Nimbus, but there's the new Cleansweep out, that'd be great - yeah, I think I'll go and tell her I like the Cleansweep, just so she knows."**

**He dashed from the room, leaving Harry and Hermione alone.**

**For some reason, Harry found he did not want to look at ****Hermione.**

"Poor Harry," said Lily. "He's obviously not completely happy that he didn't get the badge, but he's going to but on a happy face for his friends."

**He turned to his bed, picked up the pile of clean robes Mrs. Weasley had laid on it and crossed the room to his trunk.**

**"Harry?" said Hermione tentatively.**

**"Well done, Hermione," said Harry, so heartily it did not sound like his voice at all, and, still not looking at her, "brilliant. Prefect. Great."**

"Thought so," said Lily. "Oh, I wish I were there to comfort him. There must be a good reason why Harry didn't get the badge. Maybe with all that was going on, being prefect might have been an added pressure."

**"Thanks," said Hermione. "Erm - Harry - could I borrow Hedwig so I can tell Mum and Dad? They'll be really pleased - I mean prefect is something they can understand."**

**"Yeah, no problem," said Harry, still in the horrible hearty voice that did not belong to him. "Take her!"**

**He leaned over his trunk, laid the robes on the bottom of it and pretended to be rummaging for something while Hermione crossed to the wardrobe and called Hedwig down. A few moments passed; Harry heard the door close but remained bent double, listening; the only sounds he could hear were the blank picture on the wall sniggering again and the wastepaper basket in the corner coughing up the owl droppings.**

**He straightened up and looked behind him. Hermione had left and Hedwig had gone. Harry hurried across the room, closed the door, then returned slowly to his bed and sank on to it, gazing unseeingly at the foot of the wardrobe.**

"I'm really starting to wish that Harry had gotten prefect, even if he is the son of a Marauder," said James. "His mother is one, so it would be understandable."

**He had forgotten completely about prefects being chosen in the fifth year. He had been too anxious about the possibility of being expelled to spare a thought for the fact that badges must be winging their way towards certain people. But if he had remembered - if he had thought about it - what would he have expected?**

**Not this, said a small and truthful voice inside his head.**

**Harry screwed up his face and buried it in his hands. He could not lie to himself; if he had known the prefect badge was on its way, he would have expected it to come to him, not Ron. Did this make him as arrogant as Draco Malfoy? Did he think himself superior to everyone else? Did he really believe he was better than Ron?**

"The answer had better be no," said Lily firmly. "Except maybe in Quidditch and Defense Against Dark Arts."

**No, said the small voice defiantly.**

**Was that true? Harry wondered, anxiously probing his own feelings.**

**I'm better at Quidditch, said the voice. But I'm not better at anything else.**

**That was definitely true, Harry thought; he was no better than Ron in lessons.**

"Except in Defense," said Sirius. "You got a perfect score on Moony's final exam, while Ron didn't, and was able to completely throw off the Imperius Curse."

**But what about outside lessons? What about those adventures he, Ron and Hermione had had together since starting at Hogwarts, often risking much worse than expulsion?**

**Well, Ron and Hermione were with me most of the time, said the voice in Harry's head.**

**Not all the time, though, Harry argued with himself. They didn't fight Quirrell with me. They didn't take on Riddle and the Basilisk. They didn't get rid of all those Dementors the night Sirius escaped. They weren't in that graveyard with me, the night Voldemort returned - And the same feeling of ill-usage that had overwhelmed him on the night he had arrived rose again. I've definitely done more, Harry thought indignantly. I've done more than either of them!**

"You can't be mad at Hermione being prefect, are you Harry?" asked Remus. "There's always been a female prefect with a male, and Hermione's the logical choice among the fifth year girls in Gryffindor. You surely can't expect Lavender or Parvati to made prefect."

**But maybe, said the small voice fairly, maybe Dumbledore doesn't choose prefects because they've got themselves into a load of dangerous situations - maybe he chooses them for other reasons - Ron must have something you don't -**

"I think Dumbledore decided that Harry shouldn't be made prefect for some reason and that Ron was the obvious choice out of Ron, Neville, Dean, and Seamus," said Peter.

**Harry opened his eyes and stared through his fingers at the wardrobe's clawed feet, remembering what Fred had said: "No one in their right mind would make Ron a prefect -"**

**Harry gave a small snort of laughter. A second later he felt sickened with himself.**

"You'd better," scolded Lily. "It's not Ron's fault. He didn't ask McGonagall to recommend him as prefect and have Dumbledore give him the badge."

**Ron had not asked Dumbledore to give him the prefect badge. This was not Ron's fault. Was he, Harry, Ron's best friend in the world, going to sulk because he didn't have a badge, laugh with the twins behind Ron's back, ruin this for Ron when, for the first time, he had beaten Harry at something?**

"If you do, I am going to be very disappointed in you," said James.

"And I'll find a way to ground you for a month!" added Lily.

**At this point Harry heard Ron's footsteps on the stairs again. He stood up, straightened his glasses, and hitched a grin on to his face as Ron bounded back through the door.**

**"Just caught her!" he said happily. "She says she'll get the Cleansweep if she can."**

**"Cool," Harry said, and he was relieved to hear that his voice had stopped sounding hearty. "Listen - Ron - well done, mate."**

**The smile faded off Ron's face.**

**"I never thought it would be me!" he said, shaking his head. "I thought it would be you!"**

"Well, Ron isn't rubbing it in Harry's face," said Sirius. "That's good."

**"Nah, I've caused too much trouble," Harry said, echoing Fred.**

**"Yeah," said Ron, "yeah, I suppose- well, we'd better get our trunks packed, hadn't we?"**

**It was odd how widely their possessions seemed to have scattered themselves since they had arrived. It took them most of the afternoon to retrieve their books and belongings from all over the house and stow them back inside their school trunks. Harry noticed that Ron kept moving his prefect's badge around, first placing it on his bedside table, then putting it into his jeans pocket, then taking it out and lying it on his folded robes, as though to see the effect of the red on the black. **

"Well, at least he's not behaving totally like Percy when he was made prefect," said Remus.

**Only when Fred and George dropped in and offered to attach it to his forehead with a Permanent Sticking Charm did he wrap it tenderly in his maroon socks and lock it in his trunk.**

**Mrs. Weasley returned from Diagon Alley around six o'clock, laden with books and carrying a long package wrapped in thick brown paper that Ron took from her with a moan of longing.**

**"Never mind unwrapping it now, people are arriving for dinner, I want you all downstairs," she said, but the moment she was out of sight Ron ripped off the paper in a frenzy and examined every inch of his new broom, an ecstatic expression on his face.**

"A Cleansweep is a pretty decent broom," said James. "Though obviously not as good as Harry's brooms."

**Down in the basement Mrs. Weasley had hung a scarlet banner over the heavily laden dinner table, which read:**

**CONGRATULATIONS RON AND HERMIONE NEW PREFECTS**

**She looked in a better mood than Harry had seen her all holiday.**

"She would be," commented Lily. "Her youngest son's been made prefect."

**"I thought we'd have a little party, not a sit-down dinner," she told Harry, Ron, Hermione, Fred, George and Ginny as they entered the room. "Your father and Bill are on their way, Ron. I've sent them both owls and they're thrilled," she added, beaming.**

**Fred rolled his eyes.**

**Sirius, Lupin, Tonks, and Kingsley Shacklebolt were already there and Mad-Eye Moody stumped in shortly after Harry had got himself a Butterbeer.**

**"Oh, Alastor, I am glad you're here," said Mrs. Weasley brightly, as Mad-Eye shrugged off his travelling cloak. "We've been wanting to ask you for ages - could you have a look in the writing desk in the drawing room and tell us what's inside it? We haven't wanted to open it just in case it's something really nasty."**

**"No problem, Molly -"**

**Moody's electric-blue eye swivelled upwards and stared fixedly through the ceiling of the kitchen.**

Lily gave Sirius a stern look. "Don't you dare make any disgusting comments about Moody's revolving eye like you did last time, Sirius Black."

**"Drawing room- " he growled, as the pupil contracted. "Desk in the corner? Yeah, I see it - yeah, it's a Boggart- want me to go up and get rid of it, Molly?"**

**"No, no, I'll do it myself later," beamed Mrs. Weasley, "you have your drink. We're having a little bit of a celebration, actually -" She gestured at the scarlet banner. "Fourth prefect in the family!" she said fondly, ruffling Ron's hair.**

**"Prefect, eh?" growled Moody, his normal eye on Ron and his magical eye swivelling around to gaze into the side of his head. Harry had the very uncomfortable feeling it was looking at him and moved away towards Sirius and Lupin.**

**"Well, congratulations," said Moody, still glaring at Ron with his normal eye, "authority figures always attract trouble, but I suppose Dumbledore thinks you can withstand most major jinxes or he wouldn't have appointed you -"**

"Trust Moody to look at it that way," said Remus.

**Ron looked rather startled at this view of the matter but was saved the trouble of responding by the arrival of his father and oldest brother. Mrs. Weasley was in such a good mood she did not even complain that they had brought Mundungus with them; he was wearing a long overcoat that seemed oddly lumpy in unlikely places and declined the offer to remove it and put it with Moody's travelling cloak.**

Lily tsked. "More illegal or stolen things, no doubt."

**"Well, I think a toast is in order," said Mr. Weasley, when everyone had a drink. He raised his goblet. "To Ron and Hermione, the new Gryffindor prefects!"**

**Ron and Hermione beamed as everyone drank to them, and then applauded.**

**"I was never a prefect myself," said Tonks brightly from behind Harry as everybody moved towards the table to help themselves to food. Her hair was tomato red and waist-length today; she looked like Ginny's older sister. "My Head of House said I lacked certain necessary qualities."**

"I'm not surprised," said Sirius. "Andi was something of a rebel and troublemaker herself, though she did avoid being caught and was made prefect. I guess Tonks took more after me and got caught."

**"Like what?" said Ginny, who was choosing a baked potato.**

**"Like the ability to behave myself," said Tonks.**

They all laughed. "Definitely takes after me," said Sirius.

**Ginny laughed; Hermione looked as though she did not know whether to smile or not and compromised by taking an extra large gulp of Butterbeer and choking on it.**

**"What about you, Sirius?" Ginny asked, thumping Hermione on the back.**

Sirius burst into a fit of laughter. "Oh please, nobody in their right mind would have ever made me prefect! I spend too much time in detention with James!"

**Sirius, who was right beside Harry, let out his usual bark-like laugh.**

**"No one would have made me a prefect, I spent too much time in detention with James. **

"Exactly!" exclaimed Sirius. "The future me said almost exactly the same thing!"

**Lupin was the good boy, he got the badge."**

**"I think Dumbledore might have hoped I would be able to exercise some control over my best friends," said Lupin. "I need scarcely say that I failed dismally."**

"Yeah," said Remus, smiling. "And the future me said almost the same thing I did."

**Harry's mood suddenly lifted. His father had not been a prefect either. All at once the party seemed much more enjoyable; he loaded up his plate, feeling doubly fond of everyone in the room.**

"It's a good thing I didn't make prefect then," said James. "Harry's not so disappointed at not making prefect since it turns out I didn't."

**Ron was rhapsodising about his new broom to anybody who would listen.**

**"- nought to seventy in ten seconds, not bad, is it? When you think the Comet Two Ninety's only nought to sixty and that's with a decent tailwind according to _Which Broomstick_?"**

**Hermione was talking very earnestly to Lupin about her view of elf rights.**

Remus made a face. "This is going to be boring. But to be polite, I'm going to just stand there and put up with Hermione's talk."

**"I mean, it's the same kind of nonsense as werewolf segregation, isn't it?**

"She does have a point," said Remus. "But unlike werewolves, house-elves actually like being enslaved. Except for Dobby, and even he preferred work. He just wanted a decent master or mistress to work for and some wages."

**It all stems from this horrible thing wizards have of thinking they're superior to other creatures -"**

"We don't think we're superior to other creatures," protested Lily. "Neither does Dumbledore."

"Just because the five of us and Dumbledore don't, doesn't mean the rest of the wizarding world think the same way," said James.

**Mrs. Weasley and Bill were having their usual argument about Bill's hair.**

**"- getting really out of hand, and you're so good-looking, it would look much better shorter, wouldn't it, Harry?"**

"Well, Fleur Delacour seems to like Bill's long hair," said Sirius, grinning. "Or Bill would have gotten his hair cut the day she started working at Gringotts."

**"Oh - I dunno -" said Harry, slightly alarmed at being asked his opinion; he slid away from them in the direction of Fred and George, who were huddled in a corner with Mundungus.**

"Doing trade with him," said Lily disapproving, shaking her head.

**Mundungus stopped talking when he saw Harry, but Fred winked and beckoned Harry closer.**

**"It's OK," he told Mundungus, "we can trust Harry, he's our financial backer."**

**"Look what Dung's got us," said George, holding out his hand to Harry. It was full of what looked like shrivelled black pods. A faint rattling noise was coming from them, even though they were completely stationary.**

"Sounds like Venomous Tentacula seeds," said Sirius. "But aren't they a Non-Tradeable Substance?"

"Well, Dung would be able to get his hands on some," said James.

**"Venomous Tentacula seeds," said George. "We need them for the Skiving Snackboxes but they're a Class C Non-Tradeable Substance so we"ve been having a bit of trouble getting hold of them."**

**"Ten Galleons the lot, then, Dung?" said Fred.**

**"Wiv all the trouble I went to to get 'em?" said Mundungus, his saggy, bloodshot eyes stretching even wider. "I'm sorry, lads, but I'm not taking a Knut under twenty."**

**"Dung likes his little joke," Fred said to Harry.**

**"Yeah, his best one so far has been six Sickles for a bag of Knarl quills," said George.**

"Six sickles for a bag of Knarl quills?" asked Peter. "Don't they cost two sickles at the Apothecary in Diagon Alley?"

"Yeah," said Remus. "Dung obviously is trying to get more money."

**"Be careful," Harry warned them quietly.**

**"What?" said Fred. "Mum's busy cooing over Prefect Ron, we're OK."**

"But what about Moody?" asked James. "He could have his magical eye on you."

**"But Moody could have his eye on you," Harry pointed out.**

**Mundungus looked nervously over his shoulder.**

**"Good point, that," he grunted. "All right, lads, ten it is, if you'll take 'em quick."**

**"Cheers, Harry!" said Fred delightedly, when Mundungus had emptied his pockets into the twins' outstretched hands and scuttled off towards the food. "We'd better get these upstairs -"**

**Harry watched them go, feeling slightly uneasy. It had just occurred to him that Mr. and Mrs. Weasley would want to know how Fred and George were financing their joke shop busiess when, as was inevitable, they finally found out about it. Giving the twins his Triwizard winnings had seemed a simple thing to do at the time, but what if it led to another family row and a Percy-like estrangement? **

"I very much doubt it," said Lily. "Molly will no doubt be mad, but she's not going to be so mad that the twins will break away from the family."

**Would Mrs. Weasley still feel that Harry was as good as her son if she found out he had made it possible for Fred and George to start a career she thought quite unsuitable?**

"The twins will no doubt succeed, which will bring their mother around," said James. "Her feelings for Harry won't change."

**Standing where the twins had left him, with nothing but a guilty weight in the pit ol his stomaeh tor eompany, Harry caught the sound of his own name. Kingsley Shacklebolt's deep voice was audible even over the surrounding chatter.**

**"- why Dumbledore didn't make Potter a prefect?" said Kingsley.**

**"He'll have had his reasons," replied Lupin.**

"True," said Lily. "But it would make Harry feel better if her were prefect. But on the other hand, Ron wouldn't have a new broom and his mother being so proud of him."

**"But it would've shown confidence in him. It's what I'd've done," persisted Kingsley, "specially with the Daily Prophet having a go at him every few days -"**

"Yeah," said Sirius. "I hope we can find out why Dumbledore didn't make Harry prefect."

**Harry did not look round; he did not want Lupin or Kingsley to know he had heard. Though not remotely hungry, he followed Mundungus back towards the table. His pleasure in the party had evaporated as quickly as it had come; he wished he were upstairs in bed.**

**Mad-Eye Moody was sniffing at a chicken-leg with what remained of his nose; evidently he could not detect any trace of poison, because he then tore a strip off it with his teeth.**

**"- the handles made of Spanish oak with anti-jinx varnish and in-built vibration control -" Ron was saying to Tonks.**

"So, Ron's still talking about his broom," said James, laughing.

"You went on and on about your Nimbus One Thousand after you got it," said Remus.

**Mrs. Weasley yawned widely.**

**"Well, I think I"ll sort out that Boggart before I turn in - Arthur, I don'****t want this lot up too late, all right? Night, Harry, dear."**

**She left the kitchen. Harry set down his plate and wondered whether he could follow her without attracting attention.**

**"You all right, Potter?" grunted Moody.**

**"Yeah, fine," lied Harry.**

**Moody took a swig from his hipflask, his electric-blue eye staring sideways at Harry.**

**"Come here, I've got something that might interest you," he said.**

**From an inner pocket of his robes Moody pulled a very tattered, old wizarding photograph.**

**"Original Order of the Phoenix," growled Moody. **

"Oh!" exclaimed Lily. "Then that means Harry can see us, because we were bound to have been part of the Order then as well!"

**"Found it last night when I was looking for my spare Invisibility Cloak, seeing as Podmore hasn't had the manners to return my best one… thought people might like to see it."**

**Harry took the photograph. A small crowd of people, some waving at him, others lifting their glasses, looked back up at him.**

**"There's me," said Moody, unnecessarily pointing at himself. The Moody in the picture was unmistakeable, though his hair was slightly less grey and his nose was intact. "And there's Dumbledore beside me, Dedalus Diggle on the other side - that's Marlene McKinnon, she was killed two weeks after this was taken, they got her whole family. **

"What!" exclaimed Lily. "Not Marlene, my dormmate!"

**That's Frank and Alice Longbottom -"**

"Oh no!" gasped Remus. "That's Neville's parents! I don't think this photo will improve Harry's mood any."

**Harry's stomach, already uncomfortable, clenched as he looked at Alice Longbottom; he knew her round, friendly face very well, even though he had never met her, because she was the image of her son, Neville.**

**"— poor devils," growled Moody. "Better dead than what happened to them - **

"Yes," said James. They all looked sad, remembering what Neville ahd told them and what they had found out in the fourth book.

**and that's Emmeline Vance, you've met her, and that there's Lupin, obviously- Benjy Fenwick, he copped it too, we only ever found bits of him- **

"Benjy Fenwick!" gasped Remus. "Not that Ravenclaw Sirius and James made sprout in boils last year!"

Sirius and James winced. "I think we're starting to regret ever playing that prank on him," said James.

**shift aside there," he added, poking the picture, and the little photographic people edged sideways, so that those who were partially obscured could move to the front.**

**"That's Edgar Bones - brother of Amelia Bones, they got him and his family, too, he was a great wizard- Sturgis Podmore, blimey, he looks young- Caradoc Dearborn, vanished six months after this, we never found his body- Hagrid, of course, looks exactly the same as ever- Elphias Doge, you've met him, I'd forgotten he used to wear that stupid hat- Gideon Prewett, it took five Death Eaters to kill him and his brother Fabian, they fought like heroes **

"Hey, aren't they Molly's brothers?" asked Remus. "Gideon was in Gryffindor, too, five years above us, and he mentioned having a sister named Molly who married a Weasley."

"Oh dear," said Lily. "If Molly lost her brothers the first time around, I wonder how she feels now."

**- budge along, budge along -"**

**The little people in the photograph jostled among themselves and those hidden right at the back appeared at the forefront of the picture.**

**"That's Dumbledore's brother Aberforth, only time I ever met him, strange bloke - that's Dorcas Meadowes, Voldemort killed her personally **

Lily gasped. "Not my friend from Hufflepuff!" Tears welled up in her eyes and James began to try to comfort her.

**- Sirius, when he still had short hair - and - there you go, thought that would interest you!"**

**Harry's heart turned over. His mother and father were beaming up at him, sitting on either side of a small, watery-eyed man whom Harry recognised at once as Wormtail, the one who had betrayed his parents' whereabouts to Voldemort and so helped to bring about their deaths.**

Peter flinched again and began banging his head on his hands. "Stop that, Peter," said Remus. "We know you feel terrible about it and took an Unbreakable Vow to keep from making it happen."

**"Eh?" said Moody.**

**Harry looked up into Moody's heavily scarred and pitted face. Evidently Moody was under the impression he had just given Harry a bit of a treat.**

"Well, you haven't," said Lily, wiping her eyes.

**"Yeah," said Harry, once again attempting to grin. "Er… listen, I've just remembered, I haven't packed my -"**

**He was spared the trouble of inventing an object he had not packed. Sirius had just said, "What's that you've got there, Mad-Eye?" and Moody had turned towards him. Harry crossed the kitchen, slipped through the door and up the stairs before anyone could call him back.**

**He did not know why it had been such a shock; he had seen pictures of his parents before, after all, and he had met Wormtail but to have them sprung on him like that, when he was least expecting it - no one would like that, he thought angrily-**

"True," said James. "It would be a shock for anyone, really."

"Yeah," said Lily. "It was a shock for me too, finding out that my friend Dorcas would be killed by Voldemort."

**And then, to see them surrounded by all those other happy faces - Benjy Eenwick, who had been found in bits, and Gideon Prewett, who had died like a hero, and the Longbottoms, who had been tortured into madness - all waving happily out of the photograph forever more, not knowing that they were doomed - well, Moody might find that interesting - he, Harry, found it disturbing - Harry tiptoed up the stairs in the hall past the stuffed elf-heads, glad to be on his own again, but as he approached the first landing he heard noises. Someone was sobbing in the drawing room.**

"Didn't Molly go to the drawing room to deal with the boggart?" asked Peter.

"Yeah," replied Remus. "I hope it isn't her crying in there. Thugh it might explain the chpater title."

**"Hello?" Harry said.**

**There was no answer but the sobbing continued. He climbed the remaining stairs two at a time, walked across the landing and opened the drawing-room door.**

**Someone was cowering against the dark wall, her wand in her hand, her whole body shaking with sobs. Sprawled on the dusty old carpet in a patch of moonlight, clearly dead, was Ron.**

_"What_!" they all gasped in shock.

"But Ron's downstairs!" protested Peter. "Isn't he?"

"It might be Molly's boggart," suggested Sirius.

**All the air seemed to vanish from Harry's lungs; he felt as though he were falling through the floor; his brain turned icy cold - Ron dead, no, it couldn't be - ****But wait a moment, it couldn't be - Ron was downstairs - "****Mrs Weasley?" Harry croaked.**

**"R - r - riddikulus!" Mrs. Weasley sobbed, pointing her shaking wand at Ron's body.**

"It is a boggart," said James, shaking his head.

**Crack.  
Ron's body turned into Bill's, spread-eagled on his back, his eyes wide open and empty. Mrs. Weasley sobbed harder than ever.**

**"R - riddikulus!" she sobbed again.**

**Crack.  
Mr. Weasley's body replaced Bill's, his glasses askew, a trickle of blood running down his face.**

"And apparently her worst fear is seeing her family dead," said Lily, startign to cry again. "Oh, poor Molly."

"And this explains the chapter title," said Remus heavily.

**"No!" Mrs. Weasley moaned. "No - riddikulus! Riddikulus! RIDDlKULUS!"  
Crack. Dead twins. Crack. Dead Percy. Crack. Dead Harry-**

"And Harry's included," said Sirius sadly. "She definitely sees Harry as one of her sons. Ginny's body will be next."

**"Mrs. Weasley, just get out of here!" shouted Harry, staring down at his own dead body on the floor. "Let someone else -"**

**"What's going on?"**

**Lupin had come running into the room, closely followed by Sirius, with Moody stumping along behind them. **

"Thank goodness," said Lily, wiping her eyes. "They will take care of things.

**Lupin looked from Mrs. Weasley to the dead Harry on the floor and seemed to understand in an instant. Pulling out his own wand, he said, very firmly and clearly: "****Riddikulus!"**

**Harry's body vanished. A silvery orb hung in the air over the spot where it had lain. Lupin waved his wand once more and the orb vanished in a puff of smoke.**

**"Oh - oh - oh!" gulped Mrs. Weasley, and she broke into a storm of crying, her face in her hands.**

"Poor Molly," said Peter. They all looked sympathetically at the book.

**"Molly," said Lupin bleakly, walking over to her. "Molly don't…"**

**Next second, she was sobbing her heart out on Lupin's shoulder.**

**"Molly, it was just a Boggart," he said soothingly, patting her on the head, "just a stupid Boggart -"**

**"I see them d - d - dead all the time!" Mrs. Weasley moaned into his shoulder. "All the t - t - time! I d - d - dream about it -"**

"Seeing as her brothers died in the first war, it's to be expected," said Remus bleakly, shaking his head.

**Sirius was staring at the patch of carpet where the Boggart, pretending to be Harry's body, had lain. Moody was looking at Harry, who avoided his gaze. He had a funny feeling Moody's magical eye had followed him all the way out of the kitchen.**

"It probably did," said James.

**"D-d - don't tell Arthur," Mrs. Weasley was gulping now, mopping her eyes frantically with her cuffs. "I d - d - don't want him to know - being silly -"**

**Lupin handed her a handkerchief and she blew her nose.  
"Harry, I'm so sorry. What must you think of me?" she said shakily. "Not even able to get rid of a Boggart -"**

**"Don't be stupid," said Harry, trying to smile.**

**"I'm just - s - so worried," she said, tears spilling out of her eyes again. "Half the f - f - family's in the Order, it'll b - b - be a miracle if we all come through this- and P - P - Percy's not talking to us- what if something d-d - dreadful happens and we've never in - in - made it up with him? And what's going to happen if Arthur and I get killed, who's g - g - going to look after Ron and Ginny?"**

"The Order will, of course," said Sirius firmly.

**"Molly that's enough; said Lupin firmly. "This isn't like last time. The Order are better prepared, we've got a head start, we know what Voldemort's up to -"**

**Mrs. Weasley gave a little squeak of fright at the sound of the name.**

**"Oh, Molly, come on, it's about time you got used to hearing his name - look, I can't promise no one's going to get hurt, nobody can promise that, but we're much better off than we were last time. You weren't in the Order then, you don't understand. Last time we were outnumbered twenty to one by the Death Eaters and they were picking us off one by one -"**

They all gapsed and flinched.

**Harry thought of the photograph again, of his parents' beaming faces. He knew Moody was still watching him.**

**"Don't worry about Percy," said Sirius abruptly. "He'll come round. It's only a matter of time before Voldemort moves into the open; once he does, the whole Ministry's going to be begging us to forgive them. And I'm not sure I'll be accepting their apology," he added bitterly.**

"Not everyone in the Ministry thinks Voldemort can't have returned," said Lily, frowning at Sirius.

**"And as for who's going to look after Ron and Ginny if you and Arthur died," said Lupin, smiling slightly, "what do you think we'd do, let them starve?"**

**Mrs. Weasley smiled tremulously.**

**"Being silly," she muttered again, mopping her eyes.**

**But Harry, closing his bedroom door behind him some ten minutes later, could not think Mrs. Weasley silly. He could still see his parents beaming up at him from the tattered old photograph, unaware that their lives, like so many of those around them, were drawing to a close. The image of the Boggart posing as the corpse of each member of Mrs. Weasley's family in turn kept flashing before his eyes.**

They all shuddered.

**Without warning, the scar on his forehead seared with pain again and his stomach churned horribly.**

**"Cut it out," he said firmly, rubbing the scar as the pain receded.**

**"First sigh of madness, talking to your own head," said a sly voice from the empty picture on the wall.**

"Oh shut up, Phineas or whomever you are," snapped Sirius.

**Harry ignored it. He felt older than he had ever felt in his life and it seemed extraordinary to him that barely an hour ago he had been worried about a joke shop and who had got a prefect's badge**

"Oh, my poor son," said Lily. "I wish I could be there for him."

"Me too," said James.

"Moony and I there," said Sirius. "Can't you talk to us, Harry? We'd try to help you."

There was a collective sigh, then Peter took the book to read next.


	10. Luna Lovegood

Author's Note: I completely forgot that Luna had shown up with Harry and his friends when the Marauders and Lily wished for them to appear in the Room of Requirement. Thankls to all the reviewers who pointed it out to me. I have edited this chapter and fixed the mistake.

**CHAPTER TEN  
Luna Lovegood**

They all blinked upon hearing the chapter title. "Not that girl that was with Harry when we wished for him and his friends to appear?" asked Peter.

"I would guess so," said Remus. "It can't be the new Defense teacher, that's for certain."

"Well, we finally get to see how Harry met Luna," said Lily.

"And we can see what she's like," said James. "We don't know much about her."

"Yeah, we were only introduced to her and found out that Harry considers her his friend because she helped him with something major," said Sirius. "We don't know anything else."

**Harry had a troubled nights sleep. His parents wove in and out of his dreams, never speaking; Mrs. Weasley sobbed over Kreacher's dead body,**

"Like that's ever going to happen," muttered James.

**watched by Ron and Hermione who were wearing crowns, and yet again Harry found himself walking down a corridor ending in a locked door. He awoke abruptly with his scar prickling to find Ron already dressed and talking to him. **

**"… better hurry up, Mum's going ballistic, she says we're going to miss the train."**

"You'd better not miss the train again," said Lily firmly. "Otherwise you'd have to take the Knight Bus, or have to Floo to Hogwarts."

**There was a lot of commotion in the house. From what he heard as he dressed at top speed, Harry gathered that Fred and George had bewitched their trunks to fly downstairs to save the bother of carrying them, with the result that they had hurtled straight into Ginny and knocked her down two flights of stairs into the hall; **

"Poor Ginny," said Remus, wincing. "That must have hurt."

**Mrs. Black and Mrs. Weasley were both screaming at the top of their voices.**

**"- COULD HAVE DONE HER A SERIOUS INJURY, YOU IDIOTS -"**

**"- FILTHY HALF-BREEDS, BESMIRCHING THE HOUSE OF MY FATHERS -"**

"WILL YOU EVER SHUT UP, MOTHER!" shouted Sirius, looking annoyed.

**Hermione came hurrying into the room looking flustered, just as Harry was putting on his trainers. Hedwig was swaying on her shoulder, and she was carrying a squirming Crookshanks in her arms.**

**"Mum and Dad just sent Hedwig back." The owl fluttered obligingly over and perched on top of her cage. "Are you ready yet?"**

**"Nearly. Is Ginny all right?" Harry asked, shoving on his glasses.**

**"Mrs. Weasley's patched her up," said Hermione. "But now Mad-Eye's complaining that we can't leave unless Sturgis Podmore's here, otherwise the guard will be one short."**

"Why is Sturgis late?" asked Peter, puzzled.

"Who knows?" responded Remus. "Maybe he got held up with something."

**"Guard?" said Harry. "We have to go to King's Cross with a guard?"**

**"You have to go to King's Cross with a guard," Hermione corrected him.**

**"Why?" said Harry irritably. "I thought Voldemort was supposed to be lying low, or are you telling me he's going to jump out from behind a dustbin to try and do me in?"**

"Well, that's unlikely to happen," said James. "But Moody probably just wants to be on the safe side."

**"I don't know, it's just what Mad-Eye says," said Hermione distractedly, looking at her watch, "but if we don't leave soon we're definitely going to miss the train…"**

**'WILL YOU LOT GET DOWN HERE NOW, PLEASE!' Mrs. Weasley bellowed and Hermione jumped as though scalded and hurried out of the room. Harry seized Hedwig, stuffed her unceremoniously into her cage, and set off downstairs after Hermione, dragging his trunk.**

**Mrs. Black's portrait was howling with rage but nobody was bothering to close the curtains over her; all the noise in the hall was bound to rouse her again, anyway.**

"The portrait of my mother is even worse than the real thing," said Sirius in disbelief.

**"Harry, you're to come with me and Tonks," shouted Mrs. Weasley over the repeated screeches of "MUDBLOODS! SCUM! CREATURES OF DIRT!" - "Leave your trunk and your owl, Alastor's going to deal with the luggage… oh, for heaven's sake, Sirius, Dumbledore said no!"**

"What did I do that Dumbledore said no to?" asked Sirius.

"Let me continue reading and you'll find out," said Peter.

**A bear-like black dog had appeared at Harry's side as he was clambering over the various trunks cluttering the hall to get to Mrs. Weasley.**

"Ah," said Lily. "You turned into Padfoot so you could accompany Harry to King's Cross."

**"Oh honestly…" said Mrs. Weasley despairingly. "Well, on your own head be it!"**

**She wrenched open the front door and stepped out into the weak September sunlight. Harry and the dog followed her. The door slammed behind them and Mrs. Black's screeches were cut off instantly.**

**"Where's Tonks?" Harry said, looking round as they went down the stone steps of number twelve, which vanished the moment they reached the pavement.**

**"She's waiting for us just up here," said Mrs. Weasley stiffly, averting her eyes from the lolloping black dog beside Harry.**

"What's the big deal to Sirius being there?" asked Peter. "He's in his Animagus form."

"But what if he's spotted by someone?" asked Lily worriedly.

"But nobody knows about my form except the Order members, Harry, Hermione, and the Weasley kids," pointed out Sirius.

"The Death Eaters will likely know about it as well!" snapped Remus. "Wormtail would have told them." Peter flinched and there was a look of pain.

"Okay Peter, please stop agonizing over stuff you did in a book," said James. "You know it's not going to come true now."

**An old woman greeted them on the corner. She had tightly curled grey hair and wore a purple hat shaped like a pork pie.**

"Huh?" asked Peter. "Oh right, Tonks is a Metamorphagus."

**'Wotcher, Harry,' she said, winking. "Better hurry up, hadn't we, Molly?" she added, checking her watch.**

**"I know, I know," moaned Mrs. Weasley, lengthening her stride, "but Mad-Eye wanted to wait for Sturgis… if only Arthur could have got us cars from the Ministry again… but Fudge won't let him borrow so much as an empty ink bottle these days… how Muggles can stand travelling without magic."**

**But the great black dog gave a joyful bark and gambolled around them, snapping at pigeons and chasing its own tail. **

They all had a good laugh over this, even Sirius.

**Harry couldn't help laughing. Sirius had been trapped inside for a very long time. Mrs. Weasley pursed her lips in an almost Aunt Petunia-ish way.**

**It took them twenty minutes to reach King's Cross on foot and nothing more eventful happened during that time than Sirius scaring a couple of cats for Harry's entertainment. Once inside the station they lingered casually beside the barrier between platforms nine and ten until the coast was clear, then each of them leaned against it in turn and fell easily through on to Platform nine and three-quarters, where the Hogwarts Express stood belching sooty steam over a platform packed with departing students and their families. Harry inhaled the familiar smell and felt his spirits soar… he was really going back…**

"Yes, you are," said Lily, smiling fondly. "Hogwarts is great."

**"I hope the others make it in time," said Mrs. Weasley anxiously, staring behind her at the wrought-iron arch spanning the platform, through which new arrivals would come.**

**"Nice dog, Harry!" called a tall boy with dreadlocks.**

"Must be Lee Jordan," commented James. "His commentery for the Quidditch matches are always so entertaining."

**"Thanks, Lee," said Harry, grinning, as Sirius wagged his tail frantically.**

**"Oh good," said Mrs. Weasley, sounding relieved, "here's Alastor with the luggage, look…"**

**A porter's cap pulled low over his mismatched eyes, Moody came limping through the archway pushing a trolley loaded with their trunks.**

**"All OK," he muttered to Mrs. Weasley and Tonks, "don't think we were followed…"**

**Seconds later, Mr. Weasley emerged on to the platform with Ron and Hermione. They had almost unloaded Moody's luggage trolley when Fred, George and Ginny turned up with Lupin.**

**"No trouble?" growled Moody.**

**"Nothing," said Lupin.**

**"I'll still be reporting Sturgis to Dumbledore," said Moody, "that's the second time he's not turned up in a week. Getting as unreliable as Mundungus."**

"What?!" exclaimed Remus. "What's happened to Sturgis that keeps him from showing up for duty twice?" The others shrugged.

**"Well, look after yourselves," said Lupin, shaking hands all round. He reached Harry last and gave him a clap on the shoulder. "You too. Harry. Be careful."**

**"Yeah, keep your head down and your eyes peeled," said Moody, shaking Harry's hand too. "And don't forget, all of you - careful what you put in writing. If in doubt, don't put it in a letter at all."**

**"It's been great meeting all of you," said Tonks, hugging Hermione and Ginny. "We'll see you soon, I expect."**

"Well, you should at the very least see Dora, er Tonks, again," said Sirius. "She's young enough to relate to the teens, and is really cool." Then he shook his head. "I can't believe I'm saying this about a kid who likes to suck her thumb and turn her hair into weird colors to annoy her mum."

**A warning whistle sounded; the students still on the platform started hurrying on to the train.**

**"Quick, quick," said Mrs. Weasley distractedly, hugging them at random and catching Harry twice. "Write… be good… if you've forgotten anything we'll send it on… on to the train, now, hurry…"**

**For one brief moment, the great black dog reared on to its hind legs and placed its front paws on Harry's shoulders, but Mrs. Weasley shoved Harry away towards the train door, hissing, "For heaven's sake, act more like a dog, Sirius!"**

"Aww, why can't I give Harry a doggy hug?" protested Sirius. "I won't be seeing Harry for quite awhile. At least not until Christmas."

**"See you!" Harry called out of the open window as the train began to move, while Ron, Hermione and Ginny waved beside him. The figures of Tonks, Lupin, Moody and Mr. and Mrs. Weasley shrank rapidly but the black dog was bounding alongside the window, wagging its tail; blurred people on the platform were laughing to see it chasing the train, then they rounded a bend, and Sirius was gone.**

**"He shouldn't have come with us," said Hermione in a worried voice.**

**"Oh, lighten up," said Ron, "he hasn't seen daylight for months, poor bloke."**

"True," said Lily. "But let's all hope nobody who wasn't supposed to recognized Sirius."

**"Well," said Fred, clapping his hands together, "can't stand around chatting all day, we've got business to discuss with Lee. See you later," and he and George disappeared down the corridor to the right.**

**The train was gathering still more speed, so that the houses outside the window flashed past, and they swayed where they stood.**

**"Shall we go and find a compartment, then?" Harry asked.**

"I just remembered!" exclaimed Remus. "Ron and Hermione have to go to the prefect's carriage! Which means they can't be with Harry at the moment."

"Yeah," said Peter, remembering. "James and Sirius weren't that happy about it when Remus told them that he couldn't sit in the Marauder's carriage until after the prefects' meeting. Then when he did arrive, he had to get up every so often to help patrol the train."

**Ron and Hermione exchanged looks.**

**"Er," said Ron.**

**"We're - well - Ron and I are supposed to go into the prefect carriage," Hermione said awkwardly.**

**Ron wasn't looking at Harry; he seemed to have become intensely interested in the fingernails on his left hand.**

"Poor Harry," said James. "And poor Ron."

**"Oh," said Harry. "Right. Fine."**

**"I don't think we'll have to stay there all journey," said Hermione quickly. "Our letters said we just get instructions from the Head Boy and Girl and then patrol the corridors from time to time."**

**"Fine," said Harry again. "Well, I - I might see you later, then."**

**"Yeah, definitely," said Ron, casting a shifty, anxious look at Harry. "It's a pain having to go down there, I'd rather - but we have to - I mean, I'm not enjoying it, I'm not Percy," he finished defiantly.**

"We know," they all said.

**"I know you're not," said Harry and he grinned. But as Hermione and Ron dragged their trunks, Crookshanks and a caged Pigwidgeon off towards the engine end of the train, Harry felt an odd sense of loss. He had never travelled on the Hogwarts Express without Ron.**

"Ron will turn up in an hour or so," soothed Lily.

**"Come on," Ginny told him, "if we get a move on we'll be able to save them places."**

**"Right," said Harry, picking up Hedwig's cage in one hand and the handle of his trunk in the other. They struggled off down the corridor, peering through the glass-panelled doors into the compartments they passed, which were already full. Harry could not help noticing that a lot of people stared back at him with great interest and that several of them nudged their neighbours and pointed him out. After he had met this behaviour in five consecutive carriages he remembered that the Daily Prophet had been telling its reader all summer what a lying show-off he was. He wondered dully whether the people now staring and whispering believed the stories.**

"Some of them probably do," said Remus. "But I imagine just about everyone in Slytherin believe you."

**In the very last carriage they met Neville Longbottom, Harry's fellow fifth-year Gryffindor, his round face shining with the effort of pulling his trunk along and maintaining a one-handed grip on his struggling toad, Trevor.**

**"Hi, Harry" he panted. "Hi, Ginny… everywhere's full… I can't find a seat…"**

**"What are you talking about?" said Ginny, who had squeezed past Neville to peer into the compartment behind him. "There's room in this one, there's only Loony Lovegood in here —"**

"Loony?" asked James puzzled. "I thought the chapter title was 'Luna Lovegood'."

"Maybe it's a nickname," suggested Sirius. "Because she's a bit weird or something."

**Neville mumbled something about not wanting to disturb anyone.**

**"Don't be silly," said Ginny, laughing, "she's all right."**

**She slid the door open and pulled her trunk inside. Harry and Neville followed.**

**"Hi, Luna," said Ginny, "is it OK if we take these seats?"**

"Well, at least Ginny doesn't call Luna 'Loony' to her face," said Lily, frowning slightly.

**The girl beside the window looked up. She had straggly, waist-length, dirty-blonde hair, very pale eyebrows and protuberant eyes that gave her a permanently surprised look. Harry knew at once why Neville had chosen to pass this compartment by. The girl gave off an aura of distinct dottiness. Perhaps it was the fact that she had stuck her wand behind her left ear for safekeeping, or that she had chosen to wear a necklace of Butterbeer corks, or that she was reading a magazine upside-down. **

James and Sirius sniggered, and Peter remarked, "Well, that explains why she's called 'Loony'."

"Luna has to be in Ginny's year, if Ginny knows her," said Remus thoughtfully. "But I don't think she's in Gryffindor, or Harry would have definitely seen her before and made note of it."

"Yeah, if someone that odd turned up in Gryffindor, we'd notice," said James, still snickering.

"James Potter!" exclaimed Lily. "Will you stop that right now! Just because she looks a bit odd doesn't give you the right to laugh at her." James instantly stopped laughing at Luna.

**Her eyes ranged over Neville and came to rest on Harry. She nodded.**

**"Thanks," said Ginny, smiling at her.**

**Harry and Neville stowed the three trunks and Hedwig's cage in the luggage rack and sat down. Luna watched them over her upside-down magazine, which was called _The _****_Quibbler_. **

"Definitely must be related to the editor," said Sirius. "Probably Luna's his daughter."

**She did not seem to need to blink as much as normal humans. She stared and stared at Harry, who had taken the seat opposite her and now wished he hadn't.**

**"Had a good summer, Luna?" Ginny asked.**

**"Yes," said Luna dreamily, without taking her eyes off Harry. "Yes, it was quite enjoyable, you know. You're Harry Potter," she added.**

"Well, who else would he be?" asked James sarcastically. "Draco Malfoy?"

**"I know I am," said Harry.**

**Neville chuckled. Luna turned her pale eyes on him instead.**

**"And I don't know who you are."**

**"I'm nobody," said Neville hurriedly.**

"No you're not!" snapped Lily. "You're a nice person. Neville, and have hidden talents."

**"No you're not," said Ginny sharply. "Neville Longbottom - Luna Lovegood. Luna's in my year, but in Ravenclaw."**

James raised a brow. "I wasn't expecting her to be Ravenclaw."

"She has to have brains," said Remus. "Don't go judging her by her appearance."

**"Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure," said Luna in a singsong voice.**

"What the heck does that mean?" asked Peter, confushed.

"I think it means something like unmeasurable intelligence is the greatest thing man has," said Lily. Peter looked slightly less confused. Remus then clarified it even further and then Peter finally completely understood.

**She raised her upside-down magazine high enough to hide her face and fell silent. Harry and Neville looked at each other with their eyebrows raised. Ginny suppressed a giggle.**

**The train rattled onwards, speeding them out into open country. It was an odd, unsettled sort of day; one moment the carriage was full of sunlight and the next they were passing beneath ominously grey clouds.**

"Oh dear, the weather's turning nasty," said Lily. "It'll probably start raining soon."

**"Guess what I got for my birthday?" said Neville.**

**"Another Remembrall?" said Harry, remembering the marble-like device Neville's grandmother had sent him in an effort to improve his abysmal memory.**

**"No," said Neville. "I could do with one, though, 1 lost the old one ages ago… no, look at this…"**

**He dug the hand that was not keeping a firm grip on Trevor into his schoolbag and after a little bit of rummaging pulled out what appeared to be a small grey cactus in a pot, except that it was covered with what looked like boils rather than spines.**

"I recognize the plant, but I can't recall the name at the moment," said Remus. "It begins with 'm', I think."

**"Mimbulus mimbletonia," he said proudly.**

"Yes! That's the name!" exclaimed Remus.

**Harry stared at the thing. It was pulsating slightly, giving it the rather sinister look of some diseased internal organ.**

**"It's really, really rare," said Neville, beaming. "I don't know it there's one in the greenhouse at Hogwarts, even. I can't wait to show it to Professor Sprout. My Great Uncle Algie got it for me in Assyria. I'm going to see if I can breed from it."**

"Well, it's a better present that a toad for getting your Hogwarts letter," said Sirius. "And Neville's best subject is Herbology."

"Well, toads were probably in fashion when Neville's great-uncle went to school," said James.

**Harry knew that Neville's favourite subject was Herbology but for the life of him he could not see what he would want with this stunted little plant.**

**"Does it - er - do anything?" he asked.**

**"Loads of stuff!" said Neville proudly. "It's got an amazing defensive mechanism. Here, hold Trevor for me…"**

"No!" exclaimed Remus. "I remember reading that if you prod it, it sprays Stinksap everywhere!" Seeing the other's looks, he added, "Of course, it's not poisonous or anything, but it stinks."

**He dumped the toad into Harry's lap and took a quill from his schoolbag. Luna Lovegood's popping eyes appeared over the top of her upside-down magazine again, to watch what Neville was doing. Neville held the Mimbulus mimbletonia up to his eyes, his tongue between his teeth, chose his spot, and gave the plant a sharp prod with the tip of his quill.**

**Liquid squirted from every boil on the plant; thick, stinking, dark green jets of it. **

They all winced.

**They hit the ceiling, the windows, and spattered Luna Lovegood's magazine; Ginny, who had flung her arms up in front of her face just in time, merely looked as though she was wearing a slimy green hat, but Harry, whose hands had been busy preventing Trevor's escape, received a faceful. It smelled like rancid manure.**

"Yuck!" they exclaimed, making faces.

**Neville, whose face and torso were also drenched, shook his head to get the worst out of his eyes.**

**"S - sorry," he gasped. "I haven't tried that before… didn't realise it would be quite so… don't worry, though, Stinksap's not poisonous," he added nervously, as Harry spat a mouthful on to the floor.**

"But it stinks!" protested Peter. "That's why it's called 'Stinksap'!"

**At that precise moment the door of their compartment slid open.  
"Oh… hello, Harry," said a nervous voice. "Um… bad time?"**

**Harry wiped the lenses of his glasses with his Trevor-free hand. A very pretty girl with long, shiny black hair was standing in the doorway smiling at him: Cho Chang, the Seeker on the Ravenclaw Quidditch team.**

"Oh no!" exclaimed Lily, though she couldn't help bursting into a fit of giggles. "Harry's crush has to show up!"

The Marauders, minus Remus began laughing hysterically. "He's covered in Stinksap!" chortled James. "Just as Cho Chang walks in!"

"How hilarious!" gasped Sirius, unable to stop his laughter. "Oh, if only we could be there to tease Harry about it!"

Remus, who had been laughing about it, but not as much as the other Marauders, said sternly, "Well, you've gotten into embarrassing situations, Prongs, then had Lily walk in on it. You turn red, but still can't help asking her if she'd go out with you." James stopped laughing and glared at him.

**"Oh… hi," said Harry blankly.**

**"Um…" said Cho. "Well… just thought I'd say hello… bye then."**

**Rather pink in the face, she closed the door and departed. Harry slumped back in his seat and groaned. He would have liked Cho to discover him sitting with a group of very cool people laughing their heads off at a joke he had just told; he would not have chosen to be sitting with Neville and Loony Lovegood, clutching a toad and dripping in Stinksap.**

"Look, you father didn't get me to agree to go out with him by impressing me or hanging around with cool friends, Harry James Potter!" snapped Lily. "He won me over by acting like his inner self, which is nice and sweet and concerned about his future son! Just be yourself. Anyone who doesn't like that isn't worth dating."

**"Never mind," said Ginny bracingly. "Look, we can easily get rid of all this." She pulled out her wand. "Scourgify!"**

**The Stinksap vanished.**

**"Sorry," said Neville again, in a small voice.**

**Ron and Hermione did not turn up for nearly an hour, by which time the food trolley had already gone by. Harry, Ginny, and Neville had finished their pumpkin pasties and were busy swapping Chocolate Frog Cards when the compartment door slid open and they walked in, accompanied by Crookshanks and a shrilly hooting Pigwidgeon in his cage.**

**"I'm starving," said Ron, stowing Pigwidgeon next to Hedwig, grabbing a Chocolate Frog from Harry and throwing himself into the seat next to him. He ripped open the wrapper, bit off the frog's head and leaned back with his eyes closed as though he had had a very exhausting morning.**

**"Well, there are two fifth-year prefects from each house," said Hermione, looking thoroughly disgruntled as she took her seat. "Boy and girl from each."**

**"And guess who's a Slytherin prefect?" said Ron, still with his eyes closed.**

"Probably Draco Malfoy," growled Sirius.

**"Malfoy," replied Harry at once, certain his worst fear would be confirmed.**

**"Course," said Ron bitterly, stuffing the rest of the Frog into his mouth and taking another.**

**"And that complete cow Pansy Parkinson," said Hermione viciously. "How she got to be a prefect when she's thicker than a concussed troll…"**

"Well, the only other girl in Slytherin that's been mentioned is Millicent Bulstrode, and I don't think you'd want her as prefect," said James. "Especially considering that she's built like a female Crabbe or Goyle."

**"Who are Hufflepuff's?" Harry asked.**

**"Ernie Macmillan and Hannah Abbott," said Ron thickly.**

"Well, they're okay," said Sirius. "Except maybe for their wearing 'Support Cedric' badges and thinking that Harry was the Heir of Sytherin."

"They're in Hufflepuff, so of course they'd have to support Cedric," pointed out Lily.

"Okay, that can be excused," said Sirius. "But not the thinking that Harry was the Heir. But Ernie did apologize, so he's not that bad."

**"And Anthony Goldstein and Padma Patil for Ravenclaw," said Hermione.**

"Well, Ron went with Padma to the Yule Ball, and she sounds okay," said Peter.

"Yeah," said Remus. "But we don't know anything about Anthony Goldstein. He doesn't seem to have been mentioned before."

**"You went to the Yule Ball with Padma Patil," said a vague voice.**

**Everyone turned to look at Luna Lovegood, who was gazing unblinkingly at Ron over the top of _The Quibbler_. He swallowed his mouthful of Frog.**

**"Yeah, I know I did," he said, looking mildly surprised.**

**"She didn't enjoy it very much," Luna informed him. "She doesn't think you treated her very well, because you wouldn't dance with her. I don't think I'd have minded," she added thoughtfully, "I don't like dancing very much."**

"Okay," said Lily slowly, looking besmused. There was a moment of silence.

Peter finally broke it to say, "I guess Ron should have asked Luna to the ball, then."

**She retreated behind _The Quibbler_ again. Ron stared at the cover with his mouth hanging open for a few seconds, then looked around at Ginny for some kind of explanation, but Ginny had stuffed her knuckles in her mouth to stop herself giggling. Ron shook his head, bemused, then checked his watch.**

**"We're supposed to patrol the corridors every so often," he told Harry and Neville, "and we can give out punishments if people are misbehaving. I can't wait to get Crabbe and Goyle for something-"**

"If I were prefect, I couldn't wait either," said Sirius. "Hey, remember when I asked Moony if he'd give Snivellus detention a few days after he'd gotten the badge?"

"Yes," said Remus, frowning. "And I told you that I wasn't supposed to abuse my position. Then I gave in and said if I spotted Snape breaking a rule, I'd give him detention."

**"You're not supposed to abuse your position, Ron!" said Hermione sharply.**

"Yeah, like Malfoy won't abuse his position at all," said James sourly.

**"Yeah, right, because Malfoy won't abuse it at all," said Ron sarcastically.**

**"So you're going to descend to his level?"**

**"No, I'm just going to make sure I get his mates before he gets mine."**

"Good," said Sirius, grinning.

**"For heaven's sake, Ron -"**

**"I'll make Goyle do lines, it'll kill him, he hates writing," said Ron happily. He lowered his voice to Goyle's low grunt and, screwing up his face in a look of pained concentration, mimed writing in midair. "I… must… not… look…like… a… baboon's… backside."**

They all burst out in hysterical laughter. When Peter recovered, he continued reading.

**Everyone laughed, but nobody laughed harder than Luna Lovegood. She let out a scream of mirth that caused Hedwig to wake up and flap her wings indignantly and Crookshanks to leap up into the luggage rack, hissing. Luna laughed so hard her magazine slipped out of her grasp, slid down her legs and on to the floor.**

**"That was funny!"**

**Her prominent eyes swam with tears as she gasped for breath, staring at Ron. **

"Okay," said Lily. "That girl is officially weird. Who laughs that hard at something funny?" Then she spotted Sirius gasping for breath and amended, "Besides Sirius, I mean."

**Utterly nonplussed, he looked around at the others, who were now laughing at the expression on Ron's face and at the ludicrously prolonged laughter of Luna Lovegood, who was rocking backwards and forwards, clutching her sides.**

**"Are you taking the mickey?" said Ron, frowning at her.**

**"Baboon's… backside!" she choked, holding her ribs.**

**Everyone else was watching Luna laughing, but Harry glancing at the magazine on the floor, noticed something that made him dive for it. Upside-down it had been hard to tell what the picture on the front was, but Harry now realised it was a fairly bad cartoon of Cornelius Fudge; Harry only recognised him because of the lime-green bowler hat. One of Fudge's hands was clenched around a bag of gold; the other hand was throttling a goblin. The cartoon was captioned: _How Far Will Fudge Go to Gain Gringotts?_**

"Huh?" asked Peter, blinking at the page. "Why would Fudge want to gain control of Gringotts?"

**Beneath this were listed the titles of other articles inside the magazine.**

**_Corruption in the Quidditch League: How the Tornados are Taking Control  
Secrets of the Ancient Runes Revealed  
Sirius Black: Villain or Victim?_**

"Well, the last article sounds interesting," said Sirius. "But considering it's _The Quibbler_, it'll be something totally impossible."

**"Can I have a look at this?" Harry asked Luna eagerly.  
She nodded, still gazing at Ron, breathless with laughter.**

**Harry opened the magazine and scanned the index. Until this moment he had completely forgotten the magazine Kingsley had handed Mr. Weasley to give to Sirius, but it must have been this edition of _The Quibbler_.**

**He found the page, and turned excitedly to the article.**

**This, too, was illustrated by a rather bad cartoon; in fact, Harry would not have known it was supposed to be Sirius if it hadn't been captioned. Sirius was standing on a pile of human bones with his wand out. The headline on the article said:**

**SIRIUS- BLACK AS HE'S PAINTED?**

**_Notorious mass murderer or innocent singing sensation?_**

"Excuse me?" asked Remus, spluttering. "Read that again, Peter." When Peter had done so, Remus continued, "Since when has Sirius been a singing sensation? He couldn't carry a tune in a bucket!"

**Harry had to read this first sentence several times before he was convinced that he had not misunderstood it. Since when had Sirius been a singing sensation?**

"Yeah, exactly my thoughts!" exclaimed James.

"Hey, I can sing!" retorted Sirius, sounding offended. He then broke into a rather off-key rendention of "God Rest Ye Merry Hippogriffs." Lily and Peter winced and put their hands over their ears, while Remus put a Silencing Charm on Sirius.

**_For fourteen years Sirius Black has been believed guilty of the mass murder of twelve innocent Muggles and one wizard. Black's audacious escape from Azkaban two years ago has led to the widest manhunt ever conducted by the Ministry of Magic. None of us has ever questioned that he deserves to be recaptured and handed back to the Dementors._**

"All the Order members, except Snape, has questioned that!" sanpped Lily.

**_BUT DOES HE?  
Startling new evidence has recently come to light that Sirius Black may not have committed the crimes for which he was sent to Azkaban. In fact, says Doris Purkiss, of 18 Acanthia Way, Little Norton, Black may not even have been present at the killings._**

**_"What people don't realise is that Sirius Black is a false name," says Mrs. Purkiss._**

"A false name?" asked Peter incredulously. He turned to stare at Sirius, who looked grumpy and was waving his arms to get the other's attention. Remus gave a start and quickly removed the Silencing Charm.

**_"The man people believe to be Sirius Black is actually Stubby Boardman, lead singer of popular singing group The Hobgoblins, who retired from public life after being struck on the ear by a turnip at a concert in Little Norton Church Hall nearly fifteen years ago. I recognised him the moment I saw his picture in the paper. Now, Stubby couldn't possibly have committed those crimes, because on the day in question he happened to be enjoying a romantic candlelit dinner with me. I have written to the Minister for Magic and am expecting him to give Stubby, alias Sirius, a full pardon any day now."_**

They all laughed and Remus said, "Well, that'll happen the day God kisses Satan and everyone claps. Really, Fudge is not going to believe one deluded woman."

**Harry finished reading and stared at the page in disbelief. Perhaps it was a joke, he thought, perhaps the magazine often printed spoof items. He flicked back a few pages and found the piece on Fudge.**

**_Cornelius Fudge, the Minister for Magic, denied that he had any plans to take over the running of the Wizarding Bank, Gringotts, when he was elected Minister for Magic five years ago. Fudge has always insisted that he wants nothing more than to cooperate peacefully with the guardians of our gold. BUT DOES HE?_**

**_Sources close to the Minister have recently disclosed that Fudge's dearest ambition is to seize control of the goblin gold supplies and that he will not hesitate to use force if need be._**

"Okay, Fudge is an idiot, but I don't think he'd be willing to offend the goblins like this," said James.

**_"It wouldn't be the first time, either," said a Ministry insider. "Cornelius 'Goblin-Crusher' Fudge, that's what his friends call him. If you could hear him when he thinks no one's listening, oh, he's always talking about the goblins he's had done in; he's had them drowned, he's had them dropped off buildings, he's had them poisoned, he's had them cooked in pies…"_**

"I really find it hard to believe that Fudge would order goblins to be baked in pies," said Lily. "Well, at least _The Quibbler_ has entertainment value."

**Harry did not read any further. Fudge might have many faults but Harry found it extremely hard to imagine him ordering goblins to be cooked in pies. He flicked through the rest of the magazine. Pausing every few pages, he read: an accusation that the Tutshill Tornados were winning the Quidditch League by a combination of blackmail, illegal broom-tampering and torture; **

"Well, that isn't very likely either," commented Remus.

**an interview with a wizard who claimed to have flown to the moon on a Cleansweep Six and brought back a bag of moon frogs to pove it; **

"Or that," said Lily. "You can't fly tot he moon on a broom. How would you be able to leave the atmosphere? And how would you even be able to breathe? Those astronaunts in the States and the Soviet Union have to wear special suits with oxygen tanks if they're going to outer space."

**and an article on ancient runes which at least explained why Luna had been reading _The Quibbler_ upside-down. According to the magazine, if you turned the runes on their heads they revealed a spell to make your enemy's ears turn into kumquats.**

"Hey, we should turn Snivelly's ears into kumquats!' exclaimed Sirius, jotting it down on the list of prank ideas.

"How about if I turn _your_ ears into kumquats?" snapped Lily. "Just leave Snape alone for awhile."

**In fact, compared to the rest of the articles in _The Quibbler_, the suggestion that Sirius might really be the lead singer of The Hobgoblins was quite sensible.**

"Yeah, it is," remarked Peter.

**"Anything good in there?" asked Ron as Harry closed the magazine.**

**"Of course not," said Hermione scathingly, before Harry could answer. "_The Quibbler_'s rubbish, everyone knows that."**

**"Excuse me," said Luna; her voice had suddenly lost its dreamy quality. "My father's the editor."**

"Oh dear," said Lily. "Well, Hermione's going to embarrassed about insulting _The Quibbler_ now."

**"I - oh," said Hermione, looking embarrassed. "Well… it's got some interesting… I mean, it's quite…"**

**"I'll have it back, thank you," said Luna coldly, and leaning forwards she snatched it out of Harry's hands. Riffling through it to page fifty-seven, she turned it resolutely upside-down again and disappeared behind it, just as the compartment door opened for the third time.**

"Malfoy and his goons," muttered Remus angrily. "Must they show up every time Harry's on the train to Hogwarts?"

**Harry looked around; he had expected this, but that did not make the sight of Draco Malfoy smirking at him from between his cronies Crabbe and Goyle any more enjoyable.**

**"What?" he said aggressively, before Malfoy could open his mouth.**

**"Manners, Potter, or I'll have to give you a detention," drawled Malfoy, whose sleek blond hair and pointed chin were just like his fathers. "You see, I, unlike you, have been made a prefect, which means that I, unlike you, have the power to hand out punishments."**

"Well, Ron has the power to hand out punishments too!" snapped James.

**"Yeah," said Harry, "but you, unlike me, are a git, so get out and leave us alone."**

**Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Neville laughed. Malfoy's lip curled.**

**"Tell me, how does it feel being second-best to Weasley, Potter?" he asked.**

"Harry doesn't mind!" retorted Lily. "Much."

**"Shut up, Malfoy," said Hermione sharply.**

**"I seem to have touched a nerve," said Malfoy, smirking. "Well, just watch yourself, Potter, because I'll be _dogging_ your footsteps in case you step out of line."**

Lily gasped and Remus said, "I don't think Malfoy's choice of words is a coincidence."

Sirius looked blank for a moment, then understood. He groaned and said, "Lucius Malfoy must have spotted me and told Draco."

**"Get out!" said Hermione, standing up.**

**Sniggering, Malfoy gave Harry a last malicious look and departed, with Crabbe and Goyle lumbering along in his wake. Hermione slammed the compartment door behind them and turned to look at Harry, who knew at once that she, like him, had registered what Malfoy had said and been just as unnerved by it.**

**"Chuck us another Frog," said Ron, who had clearly noticed nothing.**

"Ron can be a bit thick sometimes," said James, shaking his head.

**Harry could not talk freely in front of Neville and Luna. He exchanged another nervous look with Hermione, then stared out of the window.**

**He had thought Sirius coming with him to the station was a bit of a laugh, but suddenly it seemed reckless, if not downright dangerous… Hermione had been right… Sirius should not have come. What if Mr. Malfoy had noticed the black dog and told Draco? What if he had deduced that the Weasleys, Lupin, Tonks, and Moody knew where Sirius was hiding? Or had Malfoy's use of the word 'dogging' been a coincidence?**

"I doubt it," said Peter, giving Sirius a worried look.

**The weather remained undecided as they travelled further and further north. Rain spattered the windows in a half-hearted way, then the sun put in a feeble appearance before clouds drifted over it once more. When darkness fell and lamps came on inside the carriages, Luna rolled up _The Quibbler_, put it carefully away in her bag and took to staring at everyone in the compartment instead.**

**Harry was sitting with his forehead pressed against the train window, trying to get a first distant glimpse of Hogwarts, but it was a moonless night and the rain-streaked window was grimy.**

**"We'd better change," said Hermione at last, and all of them opened their trunks with difficulty and pulled on their school robes. She and Ron pinned their prefect badges carefully to their chests. Harry saw Ron checking his reflection in the black window.**

**At last, the train began to slow down and they heard the usual racket up and down it as everybody scrambled to get their luggage and pes assembled, ready to get off. As Ron and Hermione were supposed to supervise all this, they disappeared from the carriage again, leaving Harry and the others to look after Crookshanks and Pigwidgeon.**

**"I'll carry that owl, if you like," said Luna to Harry, reaching out for Pigwidgeon as Neville stowed Trevor carefully in an inside pocket.**

"That's nice of Luna," said Lily. "Hmmm, I wonder if she's got a crush on Ron. She's offering to carry his owl, laughed very hard at what he said, and said she wouldn't have minded going to the Yule Ball with him."

"Well, even if she does have a crush on Ron, nothings going to come of it," said Remus. "Ron thinks her weird, and from the hints the previous books, he'll end up with Hermione, if he opens his eyes and realizes it."

**"Oh - er - thanks," said Harry, handing her the cage and hoisting Hedwig's more securely into his arms.**

**They shuffled out of the compartment feeling the first sting of the night air on their faces as they joined the crowd in the coridor. Slowly, they moved towards the doors. Harry could smell the pine trees that lined the path down to the lake.**

**He stepped down on to the platform and looked around, listening for the familiar call of "firs'-years over 'ere… firs'-years…"**

**But it did not come. Instead, a quite different voice, a brisk female one, was calling out, "First-years line up over here, please! All first-years to me!"**

"Hey, where's Hagrid?" asked Peter. "He should be there?"

"Well, Dumbledore sent him on a mission, maybe to try to get the giants on the Order' side," said James. "Maybe Hagrid hasn't returned from it yet."

**A lantern came swinging towards Harry and by its light he saw the prominent chin and severe haircut of Professor Grubbly-Plank, the witch who had taken over Hagrid's Care of Magical Creatures lessons for a while the previous year.**

**"Where's Hagrid?" he said out loud.**

**"I don't know," said Ginny, 'but we'd better get out of the way, we're blocking the door."**

**"Oh, yeah…"**

**Harry and Ginny became separated as they moved off along the platform and out through the station. Jostled by the crowd, Harry squinted through the darkness for a glimpse of Hagrid; he had to be here, Harry had been relying on it - seeing Hagrid again was one of the things he'd been looking forward to most. But there was no sign of him.**

"He's probably still on his mission for the Order," said Sirius.

**He can't have left, Harry told himself as he shuffled slowly through a narrow doorway on to the road outside with the rest of the crowd. He's just got a cold or something…**

**He looked around for Ron or Hermione, wanting to know what they thought about the reappearance of Professor Grubbly-Plank, but neither of them was anywhere near him, so he allowed himself to be shunted forwards on to the dark rain-washed road outside Hogsmeade Station.**

**Here stood the hundred or so horseless stagecoaches that always took the students above first year up to the castle. Harry glanced quickly at them, turned away to keep a lookout for Ron and Hermione, then did a double-take.**

**The coaches were no longer horseless. There were creatures standing between the carriage shafts. **

"Oh yeah, Harry can see thestrals now," said Remus. "Because he saw Cedric die."

"But why didn't Harry see them at the end of term?" asked Peter.

"Probably because Cedric's death hadn't sunk in yet," answered Lily. "But it has now, which is why he can see thestrals. I can see them, because I saw my grandmother die two years ago, during the summer holidays."

**If he had had to give them a name, he supposed he would have called them horses, though there was something reptilian about them, too. They were completely fleshless, their black coats clinging to their skeletons, of which every bone was visible. Their heads were dragonish, and their pupil-less eyes white and staring. Wings sprouted from each wither - vast, black leathery wings that looked as though they ought to belong to giant bats. Standing still and quiet in the gathering gloom, the creatures looked eerie and sinister. Harry could not understand why the coaches were being pulled by these horrible horses when they were quite capable of moving along by themselves.**

"Actually, the thestrals have always been pulling the carriages," said James. "They're invisible to people unless they've seen someone die."

**"Where's Pig?" said Ron's voice, right behind Harry.**

**"That Luna girl was carrying him," said Harry, turning quickly, eager to consult Ron about Hagrid. "Where d'you reckon -"**

**"- Hagrid is? I dunno," said Ron, sounding worried. "He'd better be OK…"**

**A short distance away, Draco Malfoy, followed by a small gang of cronies including Crabbe, Goyle and Pansy Parkinson, was pushing some timid-looking second-years out of the way so that he and his friends could get a coach to themselves. **

"That's mean and horrible!" exclaimed Peter. Sirius added to his Malfoy list, not caring that he didn't know who the second-years were.

**Seconds later, Hermione emerged panting from the crowd.**

**"Malfoy was being absolutely foul to a first-year back there. I swear I'm going to report him, he's only had his badge three minutes and he's using it to bully people worse than ever… **

"If Malfoy keeps it up, he might get removed as prefect," said Sirius hopefully.

**where's Crookshanks?"**

**"Ginny's got him," said Harry. "There she is…"**

**Ginny had just emerged from the crowd, clutching a squirming Crookshanks.**

**"Thanks," said Hermione, relieving Ginny of the cat. "Come on, let's get a carriage together before they all fill up…"**

**"I haven't got Pig yet!" Ron said, but Hermione was already heading off towards the nearest unoccupied coach. Harry remained behind with Ron.**

**"What are those things, d'you reckon?" he asked Ron, nodding at the horrible horses as the other students surged past them.**

"Ron probably can't see them," said Remus.

**"What things?"**

**"Those horse -"**

**Luna appeared holding Pigwidgeon's cage in her arms; the tiny owl was twittering excitedly as usual.**

**"Here you are," she said. "He's a sweet little owl, isn't he?"**

**"Er… yeah… he's all right," said Ron gruffly. "Well, come on then, let's get in… what were you saying, Harry?"**

**"I was saying, what are those horse things?" Harry said, as he, Ron and Luna made for the carriage in which Hermione and Ginny were already sitting.**

**"What horse things?"**

"Yep, Ron can't see them," said James.

**"The horse things pulling the carriages!" said Harry impatiently. They were, after all, about three feet from the nearest one; it was watching them with empty white eyes. Ron, however, gave Harry a perplexed look.**

**"What are you talking about?"**

**"I'm talking about - look!"**

"It's pointless, Harry, because those thestrals are invisible to Ron," said Lily.

**Harry grabbed Ron's arm and wheeled him about so that he was face to face with the winged horse. Ron stared straight at it for a second, then looked back at Harry.**

**"What am I supposed to be looking at?"**

**"At the - there, between the shafts! Harnessed to the coach! It's right there in front -"**

**But as Ron continued to look bemused, a strange thought occurred to Harry.**

**"Can't… can't you see them?"**

"Of course he can't!" exclaimed Peter. "Ron's never seen anyone die!"

**"See what?"**

**"Can't you see what's pulling the carriages?"**

**Ron looked seriously alarmed now.**

**"Are you feeling all right, Harry?"**

"Yes, Harry's all right!" snapped Remus. "Honestly, don't you know anything about thestrals? They're mentioned in _Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them_!"

**"I… yeah…"**

**Harry felt utterly bewildered. The horse was there in front of him, gleaming solidly in the dim light issuing from the station windows behind them, vapour rising from its nostrils in the chilly night air. Yet, unless Ron was faking - and it was a very feeble joke if he was - Ron could not see it at all.**

**"Shall we get in, then?" said Ron uncertainly, looking at Harry as though worried about him.**

**"Yeah," said Harry. "Yeah, go on…"**

**"It's all right," said a dreamy voice from beside Harry as Ron vanished into the coach's dark interior. "You're not going mad or anything. I can see them, too."**

"So Luna can see thestrals too," said Sirius. "I wonder who she saw die."

**"Can you?" said Harry desperately, turning to Luna. He could see the bat-winged horses reflected in her wide silvery eyes.**

**"Oh, yes," said Luna, "I've been able to see them ever since my first day here. They've always pulled the carriages. Don't worry. You're just as sane as I am."**

"Well, that's not very comforting, considering how odd she is," said Lily. "But in the matter of seeing thestrals, Harry's as sane as Luna."

**Smiling faintly, she climbed into the musty interior of the carriage after Ron. Not altogether reassured, Harry followed her.**

"Well, that's the end of the chapter," said Peter. "Who wants to read next?" Sirius volunteered.

Author's Note: The "That''ll happen when God kisses Satan and everyone claps" is paraphrased from the book _And Eternity_, written by Piers Anthony.


	11. The Sorting Hat's New Song

**Author's Note: Thanks to narniantitanthelastairbender, who kindly wrote the chapter for me. He/She was the first one done, which is mainly why I am posting the chapter. And thanks goes to Dan Man, Ze Ultimate Fanfic Writer, Lovin Potter, and everyone else that volunteered to write the chapter. **

**Chapter 11: The Sorting Hat's New Song**

"But the Hat sings a new song every year, why's it so important now?" asked James confusedly.

"Well, maybe it's going to predict something about the future!" replied Remus thoughtfully.

"You think the Hat knows Divination?" asked Sirius. James asked the Room of Requirement for a pillow and when it appeared, threw it at Sirius. "OI! Watch it!" exclaimed Sirius.

**Harry did not want to tell the others that he and Luna were having the same hallucination, if that was what it was,**

"But it's not a hallucination, Harry!" said Lily.

**so he said nothing more about the horses as he sat down inside the carriage and slammed the door behind him. Nevertheless, he could not help watching the silhouettes of the horses moving beyond the window.**

**"Did everyone see that Grubbly-Plank woman?" asked Ginny. "What's she doing back here? Hagrid can't have left, can he?"**

"What reason would he have to leave?" said James. "Hogwarts is Hagrid's home!"

**"I'll be quite glad if he has," said Luna, "He isn't a very good teacher, is he?"**

"Yes, he is!" yelled the Marauders and Lily in unison.

**"Yes, he is!" said Harry, Ron and Ginny angrily.**

"Wait, what about Hermione?" asked Sirius.

**Harry glared at Hermione. She cleared her throat and quickly said, "Erm…yes…he's very good."**

"You better believe it!" shouted James and Sirius.

**"Well, we in Ravenclaw think he's a bit of a joke," said Luna, unfazed.**

**"You've got a rubbish sense of humour then," Ron snapped, as the wheels below them creaked into motion.**

"You tell her, Ron!" said Lily, forgetting that she had stood up for Luna in the previous chapter.

**Luna did not seem perturbed by Ron's rudeness; on the contrary, she simply watched him for a while as though he were a mildly interesting television programme.**

"Somebody's got a crush on Ron!" sang Sirius and the rest of the Marauders and Lily pelted him with pillows.

"Shut up and read!"

**Rattling and swaying, the carriages moved in convoy up the road. When they passed between the tall stone pillars topped with winged boars on either side of the gates to the school grounds, Harry leaned forwards to try and see whether there were any lights on in Hagrid's cabin by the Forbidden Forest, but the grounds were in complete darkness.** **Hogwarts Castle, however, loomed ever closer: a towering mass of turrets, jet black against the dark sky, here and there a window blazing fiery bright above them.**

"Yep, that's Hogwarts, all right!" said Sirius proudly and ducked Remus's pillow. "You have a horrible aim, Remmy."

**The carriages jingled to a halt near the stone steps leading up to the oak front doors and Harry got out of the carriage first. He turned again to look for lit windows down by the Forest, but there was definitely no sign of life within Hagrid's cabin.**

"I hope Hagrid's all right," said Lily worriedly.

"He'll be fine," replied James, although slightly unsure.

**Unwillingly, because he had half-hoped they would have vanished, he turned his eyes instead upon the strange, skeletal creatures standing quietly in the chill night air, their blank white eyes gleaming.**

"Well, they are rather creepy-looking, but they're not vicious at all," said Lily.

**Harry had once before had the experience of seeing something that Ron could not, but that had been a reflection in a mirror, something much more insubstantial than a hundred very solid-looking beasts strong enough to pull a fleet of carriages. If Luna was to be believed, the beasts had always been there but invisible. Why, then, could Harry suddenly see them, and why could Ron not?**

"Because you saw Cedric die and Ron didn't," said Sirius simply.

**"Are you coming or what?" said Ron beside him. **

**"Oh… yeah," said Harry quickly and they joined the crowd hurrying up the stone steps into the castle. **

**The Entrance Hall was ablaze with torches and echoing with footsteps as the students crossed the flagged stone floor for the double doors to the right, leading to the Great Hall and the start-of-term feast. **

"We know what the Entrance Hall looks like!" grumbled James.

**The four long house tables in the Great Hall were filling up under the starless black ceiling, which was just like the sky they could glimpse through the high windows. Candles floated in midair all along the tables, illuminating the silvery ghosts who were dotted about the Hall and the faces of the students talking eagerly, exchanging summer news, shouting greetings at friends from other houses, eyeing one another's new haircuts and robes. Again, Harry noticed people putting their heads together to whisper as he passed; he gritted his teeth and tried to act as though he neither noticed nor cared.**

"Oh, poor Harry, he's going to have a really rough year if no one believes him!" said Lily sadly.

**Luna drifted away from them at the Ravenclaw table. The moment they reached Gryffindors, Ginny was hailed by some fellow fourth-years and left to sit with them; Harry, Ron, Hermione and Neville found seats together about halfway down the table between Nearly Headless Nick, the Gryffindor house ghost, and Parvati Patil and Lavender Brown, the last two of whom gave Harry airy, overly-friendly greetings that made him quite sure they had stopped talking about him a split second before.**

"I knew I never liked those girls," declared Lily. "Too gossipy."

**He had more important things to worry about, however: he was looking over the students' heads to the staff table that ran along the top wall of the Hall. **

**"He's not there."**

"Who, Hagrid?" asked Peter.

"Who else would he be looking for, that Umbridge woman?" joked James and they laughed.

**Ron and Hermione scanned the staff table too, though there was no real need; Hagrid's size made him instantly obvious in any lineup.**

"Too true."

**"He can't have left," said Ron, sounding slightly anxious. **

**"Of course he hasn't," said Harry firmly.**

"See, Harry agrees with me!" said James proudly.

**"You don't think he's… _hurt_, or anything, do you?" said Hermione uneasily. **

**"No," said Harry at once.**

"And once again, he agrees!" repeated James and Remus waved a pillow threateningly at him.

**"But where is he, then?" **

**There was a pause, then Harry said very quietly, so that Neville, Parvati and Lavender could not hear, "Maybe he's not back yet. You know - from his mission - the thing he was doing over the summer for Dumbledore."**

"Yeah, he's looking for the giants," said Sirius.

**"Yeah…yeah, that'll be it," said Ron, sounding reassured, but Hermione bit her lip, looking up and down the staff table as though hoping for some conclusive explanation of Hagrid's absence.**

**"Who's that?" she said sharply, pointing towards the middle of the staff table.**

"Who's who?" asked Peter.

"Well, let me read and find out, Wormtail!" said Sirius impatiently.

**Harry's eyes followed hers. They lit first upon Professor Dumbledore, sitting in his high-backed golden chair at the centre of the long staff table, wearing deep-purple robes scattered with silvery stars and a matching hat. Dumbledore's head was inclined towards the woman sitting next to him, who was talking into his ear. She looked, Harry thought, like somebody's maiden aunt: squat, with short, curly, mousy-brown hair in which she had placed a horrible pink Alice band that matched the fluffy pink cardigan she wore over her robes.**

"Er…James, I think you spoke too soon about Umbridge," said Remus, going pale at the description of the woman.

**Then she turned her face slightly to take a sip from her goblet and he saw, with a shock of recognition, a pallid, toadlike face and a pair of prominent, pouchy eyes. **

**"It's that Umbridge woman!"**

"What's she here for?!" said James, furious that the witch who wanted Harry to be found guilty was at Hogwarts.

**"Who?" said Hermione. **

**"She was at my hearing, she works for Fudge!" **

**"Nice cardigan," said Ron, smirking.**

They all snorted at this.

**"She works for Fudge?" Hermione repeated, frowning. "What on earth's she doing here, then?" **

**"Dunno…" **

**Hermione scanned the staff table, her eyes narrowed. **

**"No," she muttered, "No, surely not…"**

"What is that girl up to now?" asked Sirius exasperatedly.

"I think…no, it can't be!" exclaimed Lily, shocked.

"What?" asked James eagerly, but Lily didn't respond.

**Harry did not understand what she was talking about but did not ask; his attention had been caught by Professor Grubbly-Plank who had just appeared behind the staff table; she worked her way along to the very end and took the seat that ought to have been Hagrid's.**

"That means Hagrid probably won't be back for a while," said Sirius sadly. He liked Hagrid as a teacher, mainly because Hagrid's first lesson involved Malfoy getting injured.

**That meant the first-years must have crossed the lake and reached the castle, and sure enough, a few seconds later, the doors from the Entrance Hall opened. A long line of scared-looking first-years entered,** **led by Professor McGonagall, who was carrying a stool on which sat an ancient wizard's hat, heavily patched and darned with a wide rip near the frayed brim.**

"Well, it's Sorting time. Maybe we'll find out what the chapter title means," said Lily optimistically.

**The buzz of talk in the Great Hall faded away. The first-years lined up in front of the staff table facing the rest of the students, and Professor McGonagall placed the stool carefully in front of them, then stood back. **

**The first-years' faces glowed palely in the candlelight. A small boy right in the middle of the row looked as though he was trembling.**

"Yeah, we were all terrified during our Sorting, remember, Remus?" reminisced James.

"Really? I seem to remember two boys going around convincing everyone that they were going to have to do a difficult and advanced bit of magic in front of the entire school!" replied Remus with a smirk. Sirius and James wore well-practiced innocent looks.

"Who, us?"

**Harry recalled, fleetingly, how terrified he had felt when he had stood there, waiting for the unknown test that would determine to which house he belonged. **

"But you ended up in Gryffindor, Harry!" cheered James.

**The whole school waited with bated breath. Then the rip near the hat's brim opened wide like a mouth and the Sorting Hat burst into song:**

"Can I skip it?" interrupted Sirius.

"No, we might miss something important. Remember the chapter title?" reminded Lily and Sirius sighed begrudgingly before continuing.

**_"In times of old when I was new _**

**_And Hogwarts barely started _**

**_The founders of our noble school _**

**_Thought never to be parted:_**

Everyone except Sirius cringed: he was singing (rather horribly) to the tune of the Hogwarts School Song.

**_United by a common goal,_**

**_They had the selfsame yearning,_ **

**_To make the world's best magic school_**

**_And pass along their learning._ **

**_'Together we will build and teach!'_**

**_The four good friends decided_ **

**_And never did they dream that they_**

**_Might some day be divided,_ **

**_For were there such friends anywhere_ **

**_As Slytherin and Gryffindor?_**

"Slytherin and Gryffindor? Not bloody likely!" said James and Sirius incredulously. Lily glared at them.

"It happened centuries ago, something might've changed along the way!"

**_Unless it was the second pair_ **

**_Of Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw?_ **

**_So how could it have gone so wrong?_**

**_How could such friendships fail?_ **

**_Why, I was there and so can tell_ **

**_The whole sad, sorry tale._ **

**_Said Slytherin, 'We'll teach just those_**

**_Whose ancestry is purest.'_ **

**_Said Ravenclaw, 'We'll teach those whose_**

**_Intelligence is surest.'_ **

**_Said Gryffindor, 'We'll teach all those_**

**_With brave deeds to their name,"_**

"Go, Gryffindor!" shouted James and Sirius.

**_Said Hufflepuff, 'I'll teach the lot,_**

**_And treat them just the same.'_ **

**_These differences caused little strife_**

**_When first they came to light,_ **

**_For each of the four founders had_**

**_A house in which they might_ **

**_Take only those they wanted, so,_**

**_For instance, Slytherin_**

**_Took only pure-blood wizards_ **

**_Of great cunning, just like him,_ **

**_And only those of sharpest mind_ **

**_Were taught by Ravenclaw_**

**_While the bravest and the boldest_ **

**_Went to daring Gryffindor._**

They cheered.

**_Good Hufflepuff, she took the rest,_**

**_And taught them all she knew,_ **

**_Thus the houses and their founders_ **

**_Retained friendships firm and true. _**

**_So Hogwarts worked in harmony_ **

**_For several happy years,_**

**_But then discord crept among us _**

**_Feeding on our faults and fears._ **

**_The houses that, like pillars four, _**

**_Had once held up our school,_ **

**_Now turned upon each other and,_ **

**_Divided, sought to rule._**

**_And for a while it seemed the school_**

**_Must meet an early end,_**

**_What with duelling and with fighting_ **

**_And the clash of friend on friend_ **

**_And at last there came a morning _**

**_When old Slytherin departed_ **

**_And though the fighting then died out_**

**_He left us quite downhearted._**

"Doubt it," said Sirius, pausing from his singing. "Bet they threw a party as soon as he left."

**_And never since the founders four_**

**_Were whittled down to three_ **

**_Have the houses been united _**

**_As they once were meant to be. _**

**_And now the Sorting Hat is here _**

**_And you all know the score:_ **

**_I sort you into houses _**

**_Because that is what I'm for, _**

**_But this year I'll go further,_ **

**_Listen closely to my song:_ **

**_Though condemned I am to split you_**

**_Still I worry that it's wrong, _**

**_Though I must fulfill my duty_ **

**_And must quarter every year _**

**_Still I wonder whether Sorting_ **

**_May not bring the end I fear._ **

**_Oh, know the perils, read the signs,_**

**_The warning history shows,_ **

**_For our Hogwarts is in danger_ **

**_From external, deadly foes_ **

**_And we must unite inside her_ **

**_Or we'll crumble from within_ **

**_I have told you, I have warned you…_**

**_Let the Sorting now begin._"**

Everyone sighed in relief when Sirius stopped singing, but Sirius didn't notice.

"Branched out a bit, hasn't it?" said Sirius.

"Too right it has," replied James.

**The Hat became motionless once more; applause broke out, though it was punctured, for the first time in Harry's memory, with muttering and whispers. All across the Great Hall students were exchanging remarks with their neighbours, and Harry, clapping along with everyone else, knew exactly what they were talking about. **

**"Branched out a bit this year, hasn't it?" said Ron, his eyebrows raised. **

**"Too right it has," said Harry.**

Remus, Lily and Peter stared at James and Sirius.

"Copycats," muttered Sirius to the book.

**The Sorting Hat usually confined itself to describing the different qualities looked for by each of the four Hogwarts houses an its own role in Sorting them. Harry could not remember it ever trying to give the school advice before. **

"Oh yeah, Moldywart was powerless for 13 years, all thanks to my wonderful son, so there was no need to advise the school!" said James proudly.

**"I wonder if it's ever given warnings before?" said Hermione, sounding slightly anxious.**

"It does that a lot now because of the war," said Lily.

**"Yes, indeed," said Nearly Headless Nick knowledgeably, leaning across Neville towards her (Neville winced; it was very uncomfortable to have a ghost lean through you).**

"Oh, don't we know it," said Peter, shuddering.

**"The Hat feels itself honour-bound to give the school due warning whenever it feels-" **

**But Professor McGonagall, who was waiting to read out the list of first-years' names, was giving the whispering students the sort of look that scorches.**

The Marauders winced.

"We know that look too well," said Sirius, cringing at the memory.

**Nearly Headless Nick placed a see-through finger to his lips and sat primly upright again as the muttering came to an abrupt end.** **With a last frowning look that swept the four house tables, Professor McGonagall lowered her eyes to her long piece of parchment and called out the first name. **

**"Abercrombie, Euan."**

"Do we know any Abercrombies?" asked Remus.

"Yeah, that 4th year in Gryffindor, Robert Abercrombie," replied James. He took it as a priority to memorize every Gryffindor's name.

"Probably his son, then," said Remus as Sirius continued reading.

**The terrified-looking boy Harry had noticed earlier stumbled forwards and put the Hat on his head; it was only prevented from falling right down to his shoulders by his very prominent ears.**

"Yeah, Rob's ears are pretty big as well!" exclaimed James.

**The Hat considered for a moment, then the rip near the brim opened again and shouted: _"Gryffindor!"_**

"Just like his dad!" shouted Sirius as they all cheered.

**Harry clapped loudly with the rest of Gryffindor house as Euan Abercrombie staggered to their table and sat down, looking as though he would like very much to sink through the floor and never be looked at again.**

"Poor kid," said Lily sympathetically.

**Slowly, the long line of first-years thinned. In the pauses between the names and the Sorting Hat's decisions, Harry could hear Ron's stomach rumbling loudly.**

Now Sirius's stomach rumbled.

"You're hungry again?!" said Remus exasperatedly as a plate of cookies appeared on the table and Sirius stuffed one eagerly into his mouth.

**Finally, "Zeller, Rose" was Sorted into Hufflepuff,** **and Professor McGonagall picked up the Hat and stool and marched them away as Professor Dumbledore rose to his feet. **

**Whatever his recent bitter feelings had been towards his Headmaster, Harry was somehow soothed to see Dumbledore standing before them all.**

"As are we," said Remus.

**Between the absence of Hagrid and the presence of those dragonish horses, he had felt that his return to Hogwarts, so long anticipated, was full of unexpected surprises, like jarring notes in a familiar song. But this, at least, was how it was supposed to be: their Headmaster rising to greet them all before the start-of-term feast.**

**"To our newcomers," said Dumbledore in a ringing voice, his arms stretched wide and a beaming smile on his lips, "Welcome! To our old hands - welcome back! There is a time for speech-making, but this is not it. Tuck in!"**

"Trust Dumbledore to make a joke even when there's a war going on," said Lily, shaking her head even though she was smiling.

**There was an appreciative laugh and an outbreak of applause as Dumbledore sat down neatly and threw his long beard over his shoulder so as to keep it out of the way of his plate - for food had appeared out of nowhere, so that the five long tables were groaning under joints and pies and dishes of vegetables, bread and sauces and flagons of pumpkin juice.**

"Food…" Peter was drooling. He grabbed a cookie from the plate Sirius had gotten, but Sirius snatched it back.

"My cookie!"

**"Excellent," said Ron, with a kind of groan of longing, and he seized the nearest plate of chops and began piling them on to his plate, watched wistfully by Nearly Headless Nick. **

**"What were you saying before the Sorting?" Hermione asked the ghost. "About the Hat giving warnings?"**

**"Oh, yes," said Nick, who seemed glad of a reason to turn away from Ron, who was now eating roast potatoes with almost indecent enthusiasm.**

"Just like Sirius, here," said James, gesturing to Sirius, who was taking a bite out of a cookie with each word.

**"Yes, I have heard the Hat give several warnings before, always at times when it detects periods of great danger for the school. And always, of course, its advice is the same: stand together, be strong from within." **

**"Ow kunnit nofe skusin danger ifzat?" said Ron.**

"He said, how can it know if the school's in danger if it's a hat," translated James. When he noticed the strange looks he was getting, he explained, "I've had experience translating what Sirius says when his mouth is full."

**His mouth was so full Harry thought it was quite an achievement for him to make any noise at all. **

**"I beg your pardon?" said Nearly Headless Nick politely, while Hermione looked revolted. Ron gave an enormous swallow and said, "How can it know if the school's in danger if it's a Hat?"**

"See, I was right!" said James triumphantly.

**"I have no idea," said Nearly Headless Nick. "Of course, it lives in Dumbledore's office, so I daresay it picks things up there."**

"So it wants the houses to be friends? Not likely," said Remus, thinking of Gryffindor and Slytherin in particular.

**"And it wants all the houses to be friends?" said Harry, looking over at the Slytherin table, where Draco Malfoy was holding court.** **"Fat chance."**

"See, Harry agrees," said Remus.

**"Well, now, you shouldn't take that attitude," said Nick reprovingly. "Peaceful co-operation, that's the key. We ghosts, though we belong to separate houses, maintain links of friendship. In spite of the competitiveness between Gryffindor and Slytherin, 1 would never dream of seeking an argument with the Bloody Baron."**

"Cause he's a chicken. And I can't blame him, the Bloody Baron is pretty scary," said Sirius.

**"Only because you're terrified of him," said Ron. **

**Nearly Headless Nick looked highly affronted. **

**"Terrified? I hope I, Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington, have never been guilty of cowardice in my life! The noble blood that runs in my veins-"**

"What blood?" asked Sirius and James in unison.

**"What blood?" asked Ron. "Surely you haven't still got-?" **

**"It's a figure of speech!" said Nearly Headless Nick, now so annoyed his head was trembling ominously on his partially severed neck.**

"And we don't see that often," commented Peter.

**"I assume I am still allowed to enjoy the use of whichever words I like, even if the pleasures of eating and drinking are denied me! But I am quite used to students poking fun at my death, I assure you!"**

Lily looked at the Marauders pointedly and they gave her innocent looks.

**"Nick, he wasn't really laughing at you!" said Hermione, throwing a furious look at Ron.**

**Unfortunately, Ron's mouth was packed to exploding point again and all he could manage was "Node iddum eentup sechew,"**

"No idea what Ron said there," said James, scratching his head as he tried to interpret what Ron had said.

**which Nick did not seem to think constituted an adequate apology. Rising into the air, he straightened his feathered hat and swept away from them to the other end of the table, coming to rest between the Creevey brothers, Colin and Dennis. **

"I pity them," said James, shivering as he remembered how cold ghosts were when they went through you.

**"Well done, Ron," snapped Hermione. **

**"What?" said Ron indignantly, having managed, finally, to swallow his food. "I'm not allowed to ask a simple question?"**

"I thought that was an apology!" said Remus confusedly.

**"Oh, forget it," said Hermione irritably, and the pair of them spent the rest of the meal in huffy silence. **

"So they're being normal, then," said James.

**Harry was too used to their bickering to bother trying to reconcile them; he felt it was a better use of his time to eat his way steadily through his steak and kidney pie, then a large plateful of his favourite treacle tart.**

"Food…" Peter once again attempted to grab a cookie from Sirius, but Sirius pulled the plate out of his reach.

"Sirius, that's mean!" reprimanded Lily and Sirius reluctantly gave Peter one cookie.

**When all the students had finished eating and the noise level in the Hall was starting to creep upwards again, Dumbledore got to his feet once more. Talking ceased immediately as all turned to lace the Headmaster. Harry was feeling pleasantly drowsy now. His four-poster bed was waiting somewhere above, wonderfully warm and soft… **

**"Well, now that we are all digesting another magnificent feast, 1 beg a few moments of your attention for the usual start-of-term notices," said Dumbledore. "First-years ought to know that the Forest in the grounds is out-of-bounds to students - and a few of our older students ought to know by now, too." (Harry, Ron and Hermione exchanged smirks.)**

The Marauders also exchanged smirks and Lily gave them disapproving looks.

**"Mr. Filch, the caretaker, has asked me, for what he tells me is the four-hundred-and-sixty-second time, to remind you all that magic is not permitted in corridors between classes, nor are a number of other things, all of which can be checked on the extensive list now fastened to Mr. Filch's office door.**

"Most of them were banned because of us," said Sirius proudly.

**"We have had two changes in staffing this year. We are very pleased to welcome back Professor Grubbly-Plank, who will be taking Care of Magical Creatures lessons; we are also delighted to introduce Professor Umbridge, our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher."**

**There was a round of polite but fairly unenthusiastic applause, during which Harry, Ron and Hermione exchanged slightly panicked looks; Dumbledore had not said for how long Grubbly-Plank would be teaching. Dumbledore continued, Tryouts for the house Quidditch teams will take place on the-" **

**He broke off, looking enquiringly at Professor Umbridge.**

"Why? What did the toad do?" asked James.

**As she was not much taller standing than sitting, there was a moment when nobody understood why Dumbledore had stopped talking, but then Professor Umbridge cleared her throat, "Hem, _hem_," and it became clear that she had got to her feet and was intending to make a speech.**

"What? But no one ever interrupted Dumbledore before!" said Sirius, shocked.

**Dumbledore only looked taken aback for a moment, then he sat down smartly and looked alertly at Professor Umbridge as though he desired nothing better than to listen to her talk.**

"At least he has manners," remarked Lily.

**Other members of staff were not as adept at hiding their surprise. Professor Sprout's eyebrows had disappeared into her flyaway hair and Professor McGonagall's mouth was as thin as Harry had ever seen it.**

"Which means she must be really mad!" said James.

**No new teacher had ever interrupted Dumbledore before. Many of the students were smirking; this woman obviously did not know how things were done at Hogwarts. **

"No kidding!" said Sirius.

**"Thank you, Headmaster," Professor Umbridge simpered, "for those kind words of welcome." **

**Her voice was high-pitched, breathy and little-girlish and, again, Harry felt a powerful rush of dislike that he could not explain to himself; all he knew was that he loathed everything about her, from her stupid voice to her fluffy pink cardigan.**

"You and me both, Harry," said James contemptuously.

**She gave another little throat-clearing cough ("hem, hem") and continued. **

**"Well, it is lovely to be back at Hogwarts, I must say!" She smiled, revealing very pointed teeth. "And to see such happy little faces looking up at me!"**

"Why do I doubt any of those faces will look happy?" said Remus, shaking his head.

**Harry glanced around. None of the faces he could see looked happy. On the contrary, they all looked rather taken-aback at being addressed as though they were five years old.**

**"I am very much looking forward to getting to know you all and I'm sure we'll be very good friends!"**

"Sure, whatever you say, _Professor_ Umbridge," said James, snickering as he put emphasis on "Professor."

**Students exchanged looks at this; some of them were barely concealing grins. **

**"I'll be her friend as long as I don't have to borrow that cardigan," Parvati whispered to Lavender, and both of them lapsed into silent giggles. **

The Marauders and Lily chuckled at this.

**Professor Umbridge cleared her throat again ("hem, hem"), but when she continued, some of the breathiness had vanished from her voice. She sounded much more businesslike and now her words had a dull learned-by-heart sound to them.**

"Which means we might as well go to sleep," said James.

**"The Ministry of Magic has always considered the education of young witches and wizards to be of vital importance. The rare gifts with which you were born may come to nothing if not nurtured and honed by careful instruction. The ancient skills unique to the wizarding community must be passed down the generations lest we lose them for ever. The treasure trove of magical knowledge amassed by our ancestors must be guarded, replenished and polished by those who have been called to the noble profession of teaching."**

James imitated snoring and Remus threw a pillow at him.

**Professor Umbridge paused here and made a little bow to her fellow staff members, none of whom bowed back to her. Professor McGonagall's dark eyebrows had contracted so that she looked positively hawklike, **

"Oh, scary image," said Sirius and James, shuddering.

**and Harry distinctly saw her exchange a significant glance with Professor Sprout as Umbridge gave another little "_hem, hem"_ and went on with her speech. **

"If she does that stupid little cough again, I'll-I'll-" began James.

"Do what, James? Stammer at her?" asked Sirius, smirking.

**"Every headmaster and headmistress of Hogwarts has brought something new to the weighty task of governing this historic school, and that is as it should be, for without progress there will be stagnation and decay. There again, progress for progress's sake must be discouraged, for our tried and tested traditions often require no tinkering. A balance, then, between old and new, between permanence and change, between tradition and innovation…"**

**Harry found his attentiveness ebbing, as though his brain was slipping in and out of tune.**

"You're not alone," said the Marauders (except Remus). Lily hated to admit it, but this speech was really boring her as well.

**The quiet that always filled the Hall when Dumbledore was speaking was breaking up as students put their heads together, whispering and giggling. Over on the Ravenclaw table Cho Chang was chatting animatedly with her friends. A few seats along from Cho, Luna Lovegood had got out _The Quibbler_ again.**

"Rubbish magazine," snorted James.

**Meanwhile, at the Hufflepuff table Ernie Macmillan was one of the few still staring at Professor Umbridge, but he was glassy-eyed and Harry was sure he was only pretending to listen in an attempt to live up to the new prefect's badge gleaming on his chest. **

**Professor Umbridge did not seem to notice the restlessness of her audience. Harry had the impression that a full-scale riot could have broken out under her nose and she would have ploughed on with her speech.**

"Even if Moldywart came through the front doors?" suggested Sirius.

"Probably," agreed James.

**The teachers, however, were still listening very attentively, and Hermione seemed to be drinking in every word Umbridge spoke, though, judging by her expression, they were not at all to her taste.**

**"…because some changes will be for the better, while others will come, in the fullness of time, to be recognised as errors of judgment. Meanwhile, some old habits will be retained, and rightly so, whereas others, outmoded and outworn, must be abandoned. Let us move forward, then, into a new era of openness, effectiveness and accountability, intent on preserving what ought to be preserved, perfecting what needs to be perfected, and pruning wherever we find practices that ought to be prohibited."**

**She sat down.**

"Finally!" said everyone.

**Dumbledore clapped. The staff followed his lead, though Harry noticed that several of them brought their hands together only once or twice before stopping.**

"I can't blame them," said Sirius.

**A few students joined in, but most had been taken unawares by the end of the speech, not having listened to more than a few words of it, and before they could start applauding properly, Dumbledore had stood up again. **

**"Thank you very much, Professor Umbridge, that was most illuminating," he said, bowing to her. "Now, as I was saying, Quidditch tryouts will be held…" **

**"Yes, it certainly was illuminating," said Hermione in a low voice. **

"She _cannot_ have enjoyed that!" said James, shocked.

**"You're not telling me you enjoyed it?" Ron said quietly, turning a glazed face towards Hermione. "That was about the dullest speech I've ever heard, and _I_ grew up with Percy."**

**"I said illuminating, not enjoyable," said Hermione. "It explained a lot."**

"Yes, it did," said Remus thoughtfully.

**"Did it?" said Harry in surprise. "Sounded like a load of waffle to me."**

"Same here," said Sirius confusedly.

**"There was some important stuff hidden in the waffle," said Hermione grimly. **

**"Was there?" said Ron blankly.**

**"How about: 'progress for progress's sake must be discouraged'? How about: 'pruning wherever we find practices that ought to be prohibited'?"**

"I don't get it," said Peter.

**"Well, what does that mean?" said Ron impatiently. **

**"I'll tell you what it means," said Hermione through gritted teeth. "It means the Ministry's interfering at Hogwarts."**

"What?! They can't do that!" said James furiously.

"But they are," Lily pointed out.

Sirius groaned. "I think I know who Harry was talking about when he said that I would be starting a new list when we got to the fifth book." He took out a new roll of parchment and labeled it "Dolores Umbridge".

**There was a great clattering and banging all around them; Dumbledore had obviously just dismissed the school, because everyone was standing up ready to leave the Hall. Hermione jumped up, looking flustered. **

**"Ron, we're supposed to show the first-years where to go!" **

**"Oh yeah," said Ron, who had obviously forgotten. "Hey - hey, you lot! Midgets!"**

"Thank God you weren't made a prefect, James, otherwise you'd have done the same thing," said Remus.

**_"Ron!"_**

**"Well, they are, they're titchy…"**

"That's one way to put it," said James, his lips twitching.

**"I know, but you can't call them midgets! First-years!" Hermione called commandingly along the table. "This way, please!" **

**A group of new students walked shyly up the gap between the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff tables, all of them trying hard not to lead the group. They did indeed seem very small; Harry was sure he had not appeared that young when he had arrived here.**

"Well, they always seem to shrink with every year," commented Sirius.

**He grinned at them. A blond boy next to Euan Abercrombie looked petrified; he nudged Euan and whispered something in his ear. Euan Abercrombie looked equally frightened and stole a horrified look at Harry, who felt the grin slide off his face like Stinksap.**

"Even the first-years are scared of Harry!" said Lily unhappily.

**"See you later," he said dully to Ron and Hermione and he made his way out of the Great Hall alone, doing everything he could to ignore more whispering, staring and pointing as he passed. He kept his eyes fixed ahead as he wove his way through the crowd in the Entrance Hall, then he hurried up the marble staircase, took a couple of concealed short cuts and had soon left most of the crowds behind.**

"Smart move, Harry," congratulated James.

**He had been stupid not to expect this, he thought angrily as he walked through the much emptier upstairs corridors. Of course everyone was staring at him; he had emerged from the Triwizard maze two months previously clutching the dead body of a fellow student and claiming to have seen Lord Voldemort return to power. There had not been time last term to explain himself before they'd all had to go home - even if he had felt up to giving the whole school a detailed account of the terrible events in that graveyard.**

"You probably wouldn't have felt like it anyway, Harry," said Lily.

**Harry had reached the end of the corridor to the Gryffindor common room and come to a halt in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady before he realised that he did not know the new password.**

"Rotten luck," said Remus.

**"Er…" he said glumly, staring up at the Fat Lady, who smoothed the folds of her pink satin dress and looked sternly back at him.**

**"No password, no entrance," she said loftily. **

**"Harry, I know it!" Someone panted up behind him and he turned to see Neville jogging towards him.**

"Of all people to know the password…" said James, shaking his head.

**"Guess what it is? I'm actually going to be able to remember it for once-" He waved the stunted little cactus he had shown them on the train. "_Mimbulus mimbletonia_."**

"And of all the passwords…" said Sirius, shaking _his_ head.

**"Correct," said the Fat Lady, and her portrait swung open towards them like a door, revealing a circular hole in the wall behind, through which Harry and Neville now climbed. **

**The Gryffindor common room looked as welcoming as ever, a cosy circular tower room full of dilapidated squashy armchairs and rickety old tables.**

"They really ought to get new tables for the common room," commented Sirius.

**A fire was crackling merrily in the grate and a few people were warming their hands by it before going up to their dormitories on the other side of the room. Fred and George Weasley were pinning something up on the noticeboard.**

"Probably something to do with the joke shop," remarked James.

**Harry waved goodnight to them and headed straight for the door to the boys' dormitories; he was not in much of a mood for talking at the moment. Neville followed him. **

**Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan had reached the dormitory first and were in the process of covering the walls beside their beds with posters and photographs. They had been talking as Harry pushed open the door but stopped abruptly the moment they saw him. Harry wondered whether they had been talking about him, then whether he was being paranoid.**

"Probably the first one," said Sirius.

**"Hi," he said, moving across to his own trunk and opening it. **

**"Hey, Harry," said Dean, who was putting on a pair of pyjamas in the West Ham colours.**

"Well, at least if he thinks Harry's mad, he doesn't show it," said Lily brightly.

**"Good holiday?" **

**"Not bad," muttered Harry, as a true account of his holiday would have taken most of the night to relate and he could not face it. "You?" **

**"Yeah, it was OK," chuckled Dean. "Better than Seamus's, anyway, he was just telling me." **

**"Why, what happened, Seamus?" Neville asked as he placed his Mimbulus _mimbletonia_ tenderly on his bedside cabinet. **

**Seamus did not answer immediately; he was making rather a meal of ensuring that his poster of the Kenmare Kestrels Quidditch team was quite straight.**

"Stalling, more like," said Remus.

**Then he said, with his back still turned to Harry, "Me mam didn't want me to come back." **

**"What?" said Harry, pausing in the act of pulling off his robes. **

**"She didn't want me to come back to Hogwarts."**

"And I thought that Mrs. Finnigan was nice," said Lily, shocked.

**Seamus turned away from his poster and pulled his own pyjamas out of his trunk, still not looking at Harry. **

**"But-why?" said Harry, astonished.**

"Because of Harry," said James bitterly.

**He knew that Seamus's mother was a witch and could not understand, therefore, why she should have come over so Dursleyish. **

**Seamus did not answer until he had finished buttoning his pyjamas. **

**"Well," he said in a measured voice, "I suppose… because of you."**

"There is nothing wrong with Harry and I don't see why that witch thinks so!" said Lily furiously and the Marauders eyed her warily.

"Prongs, mate, why'd you choose her?" asked Sirius.

**"What d'you mean?" said Harry quickly. **

**His heart was beating rather fast. He felt vaguely as though something was closing in on him. **

**"Well," said Seamus again, still avoiding Harry's eye, "She… er… well, it's not just you, it's Dumbledore, too…" **

**"She believes the _Daily Prophet_?" said Harry. "She thinks I'm a liar and Dumbledore's an old fool?"**

Lily was seething by now and Sirius kept the book well out of her reach in case she ripped up the book in her fury.

**Seamus looked up at him. **

**"Yeah, something like that." **

**Harry said nothing. He threw his wand down on to his bedside table, pulled off his robes, stuffed them angrily into his trunk and pulled on his pyjamas. He was sick of it; sick of being the person who is stared at and talked about all the time. If any of them knew, if any of them had the faintest idea what it felt like to be the one all these things had happened to… Mrs. Finnigan had no idea, the stupid woman, he thought savagely.**

"Okay, I know you're mad as well, but you don't have to take it out on Seamus's mother!" said Lily, snapping out of her anger. "That's my job," she added as an afterthought

**He got into bed and made to pull the hangings closed around him, but before he could do so, Seamus said, "Look… what _did_ happen that night when… you know, when… with Cedric Diggory and all?"**

"What makes you think he'd want to tell you?" said James aggressively.

**Seamus sounded nervous and eager at the same time. Dean, who had been bending over his trunk trying to retrieve a slipper, went oddly still and Harry knew he was listening hard. **

**"What are you asking me for?" Harry retorted. "Just read the _Daily Prophet_ like your mother, why don't you? That'll tell you all you need to know." **

**"Don't you have a go at my mother," Seamus snapped. **

"He can have a go at anyone who thinks he's mad," said Lily.

**"I'll have a go at anyone who calls me a liar," said Harry. **

**"Don't talk to me like that!"**

"He has every right to talk to you like that!" said James. Sirius, Peter and Remus were slowly inching away from the furious couple.

**"I'll talk to you how I want," said Harry, his temper rising so fast he snatched his wand back from his bedside table.**

"Well, at least now we know he inherited your temper, Lily," joked Sirius, but Lily gave him a look so reminiscent of McGonagall that he shut up.

**"If you've got a problem sharing a dormitory with me, go and ask McGonagall if you can be moved…stop your mummy worrying-"**

**"Leave my mother out of this, Potter!" **

**"What's going on?" **

**Ron had appeared in the doorway.**

"Perfect timing," commented Remus.

**His wide eyes travelled from Harry, who was kneeling on his bed with his wand pointing at Seamus, to Seamus, who was standing there with his fists raised. **

**"He's having a go at my mother!" Seamus yelled. **

**"What?" said Ron. "Harry wouldn't do that — we met your mother, we liked her…" **

"Before she began believing that Harry was an attention-seeking brat!" said James hotly.

**"That's before she started believing every word the stinking _Daily Prophet_ writes about me!" said Harry at the top of his voice. **

**"Oh," said Ron, comprehension dawning across his freckled face. "Oh…right."**

"And now he gets it," said Remus, shaking his head.

**"You know what?" said Seamus heatedly, casting Harry a venomous look. "He's right, I don't want to share a dormitory with him any more, he's mad." **

**"That's out of order, Seamus," said Ron, whose ears were starting to glow red, always a danger sign.**

"Such a loyal friend," said Sirius.

**"Out of order, am I?" shouted Seamus, who in contrast with Ron was going pale. "You believe all the rubbish he's come out with about You-Know-Who, do you, you reckon he's telling the truth?"**

**"Yeah, I do!" said Ron angrily. **

**"Then you're mad, too," said Seamus in disgust. **

**"Yeah? Well, unfortunately for you, pal, I'm also a prefect!" said Ron, jabbing himself in the chest with a finger. "So unless you want detention, watch your mouth!"**

"Yeah, Ron! Tell him who's boss!" cheered James, his anger forgotten.

**Seamus looked for a few seconds as though detention would be a reasonable price to pay to say what was going through his mind; but with a noise of contempt he turned on his heel, vaulted into bed and pulled the hangings shut with such violence that they were ripped from the bed and fell in a dusty pile to the floor. Ron glared at Seamus, then looked at Dean and Neville. **

**"Anyone else's parents got a problem with Harry?" he said aggressively. **

**"My parents are Muggles, mate," said Dean, shrugging. They don't know nothing about no deaths at Hogwarts, because I'm not stupid enough to tell them."**

"Smart move, Dean," said Remus.

**"You don't know my mother, she'd weasel anything out of anyone!" Seamus snapped at him.**

"Gossip, then," said Lily disdainfully.

**"Anyway your parents don't get the _Daily Prophet_. They don't know our Headmaster's been sacked from the Wizengamot and the International Confederation of Wizards because he's losing his marbles." **

"If your mother thinks Dumbledore's mad, then maybe _she's_ the one losing her marbles!" said Sirius, now angry. "Maybe he is a little eccentric, but he's a bloody brilliant Headmaster!"

**"My gran says that's rubbish," piped up Neville. "She says it's the _Daily Prophet_ that's going downhill, not Dumbledore. She's cancelled our subscription. We believe Harry," said Neville simply. He climbed into bed and pulled the covers up to his chin, looking owlishly over them at Seamus. "My gran's always said You-Know-Who would come back one day. She says if Dumbledore says he's back, he's back."**

"I knew I liked that kid!" said James proudly.

**Harry felt a rush of gratitude towards Neville. Nobody else said anything. Seamus got out his wand, repaired the bed hangings and vanished behind them. Dean got into bed, rolled over and fell silent. Neville, who appeared to have nothing more to say either, was gazing fondly at his moonlit cactus.**

**Harry lay back on his pillows while Ron bustled around the next bed, putting his things away. He felt shaken by the argument with Seamus, whom he had always liked very much. How many more people were going to suggest that he was lying, or unhinged?**

"Rough year ahead," said Peter.

**Had Dumbledore suffered like this all summer, as first the Wizengamot, then the International Confederation of Wizards had thrown him from their ranks? Was it anger at Harry, perhaps, that had stopped Dumbledore getting in touch with him for months? The two of them were in this together, after all; Dumbledore had believed Harry, announced his version of events to the whole school and then to the wider wizarding community. Anyone who thought Harry was a liar had to think that Dumbledore was, too, or else that Dumbledore had been hoodwinked…**

"Dumbledore is too smart to be hoodwinked!" declared Remus.

**They'll know we're right in the end, thought Harry miserably, as Ron got into bed and extinguished the last candle in the dormitory. But he wondered how many more attacks like Seamus's he would have to endure before that time came.**

"Oh, poor Harry," said Lily miserably.

"Well, that certainly was eventful. Of all people, who would've thought Seamus would be the one to turn on Harry?" said Remus.

"Who wants to go next?" asked Sirius and Lily volunteered.


	12. Professor Umbridge

Author's Note: I am very sorry that it took such a long time to update. I was busy, and kept putting it off. I promise to try to update more frequently, and my sister has offered to write a few of the chapters for me whenever I'm too busy.

Someone, using my penname, wrote an anonymous review apologizing for the long time to update. That was not me, nor did I authorize anyone, such as my sister, to write it for me. The person also said that I realized I might have to rewrite the other fics in my series due to what was found out about Lily and Snape in Deathly Hallows. While I did tell someone in a review reply that this was the case, I'm not certain I want to do a rewrite. If someone is going to write something in my name, then please get my permission first. The only exception to this is my sister, who is allowed to help me with my work whenever I'm too busy. (But get my permission first, Allison, if you're going to issue any comments for me.)

The author would like to thank her sister, Lady Alianne, for her help in coming up with some of the comments.

**— CHAPTER TWELVE —**

_**Professor Umbridge**_

The Marauders and Lily made faces after reading the chapter title. "That Umbridge woman is probably going to turn out to be a useless teacher like Lockhart was," said Sirius glumly.

"There is a pattern going," pointed out James. "First there's the Voldemort supporter, next is a useless teacher, and third is a competent one. Then we go back to the Voldemort supporter, so that means Umbridge has to be a useless one. And the next Defense teacher will have to be competent."

**Seamus dressed at top speed next morning and left the dormitory before Harry had even put on his socks.  
'Does he think he'll turn into a nutter if he stays in a room with me too long?' asked Harry loudly, as the hem of Seamus's robes whipped out of sight.**

"Harry, just ignore Seamus," said James.

"Well, why can't you ever ignore Severus?" snapped Lily.

James sighed. "I thought you didn't like him and how he's behaving in the books."

"He's only acting like that because of how you're treating him," retorted Lily. "And besides, I only don't like him because he called me a Mudblood. Before he lost his temper and called me that, we were good friends."

The Marauders stared at her in shock. Then Sirius said, "Well, Lily was pretty mad when she first met us on the Hogwarts Express and we insulted Snape or Slytherin house or something, James. And she did get up and told Snape that they were sitting elsewhere."

"Why didn't you ever mention it before?" asked Remus.

"Because I stopped being friends with him and his behavior in the books didn't make me like him again," said Lily calmly. "Snape and I live in the same town, and he told me I was a witch after he spotted me doing magic. We became friends until he called me the 'm' word. Though he did try apologize afterward, I refused to be his friend anymore. And his hanging around people like Mulciber didn't help matters any. Now, can we please get back to the book?"

**'Don't worry about it, Harry,' Dean muttered, hoisting his schoolbag on to his shoulder, 'he's just…'**

**But apparently he was unable to say exactly what Seamus was, and after a slightly awkward pause followed him out of the room.**

**Neville and Ron both gave Harry an it's‐his‐problem‐not‐yours look, but Harry was not much consoled. How much more of this would he have to take?**

"Probably a lot," said Peter, sounding glum. "Most of the students probably won't belive you."

**'What's the matter?' asked Hermione five minutes later, catching up with Harry and Ron halfway across the common room as they all headed towards breakfast. 'You look absolutely ‐ Oh for heaven'****s sake.'**

**She was staring at the common‐room noticeboard, where a large new sign had been put up.**

**_GALLONS OF GALLEONS._**

_**Pocket money failing to keep pace with your outgoings? ****Like to earn a little extra gold? Contact Fred and George Weasley, Gryffindor common room, for simple, part‐time, virtually painless jobs. (We regret that all work is undertaken at applicant's own risk.)**_

"Bet they're trying to get people to test their products on," said James, sounding more cheerful.

**'They are the limit,' said Hermione grimly, taking down the sign, which Fred and George had pinned up over a poster giving the date of the first Hogsmeade weekend, which was to be in October. 'We'll have to talk to them, Ron.'**

"And Ron will be alarmed and not want to do it," commented Sirius.

**Ron looked positively alarmed.**

**'Why?'**

**'Because we're prefects!' said Hermione, as they climbed out through the portrait hole. 'It's up to us to stop this kind of thing!'  
Ron said nothing; Harry could tell from his glum expression that the prospect of stopping Fred and George doing exactly what they liked was not one he found inviting.**

"Like how I felt over the prospect of stopping Prongs and Padfoot," said Remus with a wry smile.

**'Anyway, what's up, Harry?' Hermione continued, as they walked down a flight of stairs lined with portraits of old witches and wizards, all of whom ignored them, being engrossed in their own conversation. 'You look really angry about something.'**

**'Seamus reckons Harry's lying about You‐Know‐Who,' said Ron succinctly, when Harry did not respond.**

**Hermione, who Harry had expected to react angrily on his behalf, sighed.**

**'Yes, Lavender thinks so too,' she said gloomily.**

**'Been having a nice little chat with her about whether or not I'm a lying, attention‐seeking prat, have you?' Harry said loudly.**

"Harry!" exclaimed Lily. "You know perfectly well that Hermione's on your side and would have no doubt told Lavender to be quiet about you."

**'No,' said Hermione calmly. 'I told her to keep her big fat mouth shut about you, actually. And it would be quite nice if you stopped jumping down our throats, Harry, because in case you haven't noticed, Ron and I are on your side.'**

**There was a short pause.**

**'Sorry,' said Harry in a low voice.**

"You should be," said Lily severely.

**'That's quite all right,' said Hermione with dignity. Then she shook her head. 'Don't you remember what Dumbledore said at the last end‐of‐term feast?'**

"I very much doubt that they will," said James. "I couldn't tell you what Dumbledore said in his last speech. Remus and Lily probably could."

**Harry and Ron both looked at her blankly and Hermione sighed again.**

**"About You‐Know‐Who. He said his 'gift for spreading discord and enmity is very great. We can fight it only by showing an equally strong bond of friendship and trust —'"**

**'How do you remember stuff like that?' asked Ron, looking at her in admiration.**

"Because she listens," said Remus. "Like I do."

**'I listen, Ron,' said Hermione, with a touch of asperity.**

**'So do I, but I still couldn't tell you exactly what ‐ʹ  
'The point,' Hermione pressed on loudly, 'is that this sort of thing is exactly what Dumbledore was talking about. You‐Know‐Who's only been back two months and we've already started fighting among ourselves. And the Sorting Hat's warning was the same: stand together, be united —'**

"Fat chance of being friends with the Slytherins," said Peter. "Except maybe with Professor Slughorn."

"Come on, there has to be decent Slytherins," said Remus. "And not just Slughorn."

"Snape was decent until he started hanging out with the wrong people," commented Lily. James and Sirius raised their brows, but didn't say anything.

**'And Harry got it right last night,' retorted Ron. 'If that means we're supposed to get matey with the Slytherins ‐fat chance.'**

**'Well, I think it's a pity we're not trying for a bit of inter‐house unity,' said Hermione crossly.**

**They had reached the foot of the marble staircase. A line of fourth‐year Ravenclaws was crossing the Entrance Hall; they caught sight of Harry and hurried to form a tighter group, as though frightened he might attack stragglers.**

"I doubt Luna's part of that group," said Sirius. The others stared at him and he added, "Well, she didn't seem scared of Harry on the Hogwarts Express. And since she's so odd, I don't think her housemates are going to associate much with her."

**'Yeah, we really ought to be trying to make friends with people like that,' said Harry sarcastically.**

**They followed the Ravenclaws into the Great Hall, all looking instinctively at the staff table as they entered. Professor Grubbly‐Plank was chatting to Professor Sinistra, the Astronomy teacher, and Hagrid was once again conspicuous only by his absence. The enchanted ceiling above them echoed Harry's mood; it was a miserable rain‐cloud grey.**

**'Dumbledore didn't even mention how long that Grubbly‐Plank woman's staying,' he said, as they made their way across to the Gryffindor table .**

"Hagrid's probably on a mission for Dumbledore, prehaps with the giants, and they don't know when he'll be back," said Remus.

**'Maybe…' said Hermione thoughtfully.**

**'What?' said both Harry and Ron together.**

**'Well… maybe he didn't want to draw attention to Hagrid not being here.'**

"Draw attention?" asked Peter. "How can anyone not notice that Hagrid's not there?"

**'What d'you mean, draw attention to it?' said Ron, half‐laughing. 'How could we not notice?'**

**Before Hermione could answer, a tall black girl with long braided hair had marched up to Harry.**

**'Hi, Angelina.'  
'Hi,' she said briskly, 'good summer?' And without waiting for an answer, 'Listen, I've been made Gryffindor Quidditch Captain.'**

**'Nice one,' said Harry, grinning at her; he suspected Angelina's pep talks might not be as long‐winded as Oliver Wood's had been, which could only be an improvement.**

"It would be," said James.

**'Yeah, well, we need a new Keeper now Oliver's left. Tryouts are on Friday at five o'clock and I want the whole team there, all right? Then we can see how the new person'll fit in.'**

**'OK,' said Harry.**

**Angelina smiled at him and departed.**

"Maybe Ron could try out," commented James. "He likes Quidditch, seems to have the build for Keeper, and he does have a new broom now." The others looked at him, then decided he had a point.

**'I'd forgotten Wood had left,' said Hermione vaguely as she sat down beside Ron and pulled a plate of toast towards her. 'I suppose that will make quite a difference to the team?'**

**'I s'pose,' said Harry, taking the bench opposite. 'He was a good Keeper…'**

**'Still, it won't hurt to have some new blood, will it?' said Ron.**

"No, it won't," said Sirius. "As long as the new Keeper is good."

**With a whoosh and a clatter, hundreds of owls came soaring in through the upper windows. They descended all over the Hall, bringing letters and packages to their owners and showering the breakfasters with droplets of water; it was clearly raining hard outside. Hedwig was nowhere to be seen, but Harry was hardly surprised; his only correspondent was Sirius, and he doubted Sirius would have anything new to tell him after only twenty‐four hours apart. Hermione, however, had to move her orange juice aside quickly to make way for a large damp barn owl bearing a sodden _Daily Prophet_ in its beak.**

"Why is she still getting the _Daily_ _Prophet _for, anyway?" asked Peter.

"Probably to see what the other side is saying," answered Lily. "That's what I'd do."

**'What are you still getting that for?' said Harry irritably, thinking of Seamus as Hermione placed a Knut in the leather pouch on the owl's leg and it took off again. 'I'm not bothering… load of rubbish.'**

**'It's best to know what the enemy is saying,' said Hermione darkly, and she unfurled the newspaper and disappeared behind it, not emerging until Harry and Ron had finished eating.  
'Nothing,' she said simply, rolling up the newspaper and laying it down by her plate. 'Nothing about you or Dumbledore or anything.'**

**Professor McGonagall was now moving along the table handing out timetables.**

**'Look at today!' groaned Ron. 'History of Magic, double Potions, Divination and double Defence Against the Dark Arts… Binns, Snape, Trelawney and that Umbridge woman all in one day! I wish Fred and George'd hurry up and get those Skiving Snackboxes sorted…'**

"I do too," said Lily. The others stared at her in surprise and she said, "What? I wouldn't want to have all four of them in one day. One's boring, another's a fraud, the third is mean and favor's Slytherins, and the fourth is bound to be a useless teacher."

**'Do mine ears deceive me?' said Fred, arriving with George and squeezing on to the bench beside Harry. 'Hogwarts prefects surely don't wish to skive off lessons?'**

**'Look what we've got today,' said Ron grumpily, shoving his timetable under Fred's nose. That's the worst Monday I've ever seen.'**

**'Fair point, little bro,' said Fred, scanning the column. 'You can have a bit of Nosebleed Nougat cheap if you like.'**

**'Why's it cheap?' said Ron suspiciously.**

**'Because you'll keep bleeding till you shrivel up, we haven't got an antidote yet,' said George, helping himself to a kipper.**

"Darn," said James. "Have they got antidotes to a Fainting Fancy or something?"

"If you've fainted, how do you take the antidote?" asked Remus.

"Good point," said James. "Maybe you wake up in five minutes so you can take it. If you don't, you faint again."

**'Cheers,' said Ron moodily, pocketing his timetable, 'but I think I'll take the lessons.'**

**'And speaking of your Skiving Snackboxes,' said Hermione, eyeing Fred and George beadily, 'you can't advertise for testers on the Gryffindor noticeboard.'**

**'Says who?' said George, looking astonished.**

**'Says me,' said Hermione. 'And Ron.'**

**'Leave me out of it,' said Ron hastily.**

"Hermione's not going to like it," remarked Peter.

**Hermione glared at him. Fred and George sniggered.  
'You'll be singing a different tune soon enough, Hermione,' said Fred, thickly buttering a crumpet. 'You're starting your fifth year, you'll be begging us for a Snackbox before long.'**

**'And why would starting fifth year mean I want a Skiving Snackbox?' asked Hermione.**

"It's OWL year," said Sirius. "Some people cave in to the pressure. One guy broke out into boils."

"That's because you hexed him for a prank," snapped Remus.

"Oh yeah," said Sirius. "I forgot."

**'Fifth year's OWL year,' said George.**

**'So?'**

**'So you've got your exams coming up, haven't you? They'll be keeping your noses so hard to that grindstone they'll be rubbed raw,' said Fred with satisfaction.**

**'Half our year had minor breakdowns coming up to OWLs,' said George happily. 'Tears and tantrums… Patricia Stimpson kept coming over faint…'**

**'Kenneth Towler came out in boils, d'you remember?' said Fred reminiscently.**

**'That's 'cause you put Bulbadox powder in his pyjamas,' said George.**

Sirius grinned. "So, looks like Fred caused someone to come out in boils, like I did."

**'Oh yeah,' said Fred, grinning. 'I'd forgotten… hard to keep track sometimes, isn't it?'**

**'Anyway, it's a nightmare of a year, the fifth,' said George. 'If you care about exam results, anyway. Fred and I managed to keep our peckers up somehow.'**

**'Yeah… you got, what was it, three OWLs each?' said Ron.**

"Did they get T's in everything else?" asked Peter.

"I think they should have gotten E's just for showing up," remarked Sirius. They all laughed.

**'Yep,' said Fred unconcernedly. 'But we feel our futures lie outside the world of academic achievement.'**

**'We seriously debated whether we were going to bother coming back for our seventh year,' said George brightly, 'now that we've got‐ʹ**

**He broke off at a warning look from Harry, who knew George had been about to mention the Triwizard winnings he had given them.  
ʹ‐ now that we've got our OWLs,' George said hastily. 'I mean, do we really need NEWTs? But we didn't think Mum could take us leaving school early, not on top of Percy turning out to be the world's biggest prat.'**

**'We're not going to waste our last year here, though,' said Fred, looking afiectionately around at the Great Hall. 'We're going to use it to do a bit of market research, find out exactly what the average Hogwarts student requires from a joke shop, carefully evaluate the results of our research, then produce products to fit the demand.'**

**'But where are you going to get the gold to start a joke shop?' Hermione asked sceptically. 'You're going to need all the ingredients and materials ‐ and premises too, I suppose…'**

"Harry gave them his Triwizard earnings," said Sirius. "He just doesn't want you knowing about it yet."

**Harry did not look at the twins. His face felt hot; he deliberately dropped his fork and dived down to retrieve it. He heard Fred say overhead, 'Ask us no questions and we'll tell you no lies, Hermione. C'mon, George, if we get there early we might be able to sell a few Extendable Ears before Herbology.'**

**Harry emerged from under the table to see Fred and George walking away, each carrying a stack of toast.**

**'What did that mean?' said Hermione, looking from Harry to Ron. "'Ask us no questions…' Does that mean they've already got some gold to start a joke shop?'**

"Yes, they do," said Lily.

**'You know, I've been wondering about that,' said Ron, his brow furrowed. 'They bought me a new set of dress robes this summer and I couldn't understand where they got the Galleons…'**

**Harry decided it was time to steer the conversation out of these dangerous waters.**

**'D'you reckon it's true this year's going to be really tough? Because of the exams?'**

**'Oh, yeah,' said Ron. 'Bound to be, isn't it? OWLs are really important, affect the jobs you can apply for and everything. We get career advice, too, later this year, Bill told me. So you can choose what NEWTs you want to do next year.'**

**'D'you know what you want to do after Hogwarts?' Harry asked the other two, as they left the Great Hall shortly afterwards and set off towards their History of Magic classroom.  
'Not really,' said Ron slowly. 'Except… well…'**

**He looked slightly sheepish.**

**'What?' Harry urged him.**

**'Well, it'd be cool to be an Auror,' said Ron in an off‐hand voice.**

"It would be," said James. "If I don't decide to go into Quidditch, that's what I'd want to do. Of course, I don't have to work, because of my family's money."

**'Yeah, it would,' said Harry fervently.**

**'But they're, like, the elite,' said Ron. 'You've got to be really good. What about you, Hermione?'**

**'I don't know,' she said. 'I think I'd like to do something really worthwhile.'**

"Being an Auror is worthwhile!" exclaimed Sirius.

**'An Auror's worthwhile!' said Harry.**

**'Yes, it is, but it's not the only worthwhile thing,' said Hermione thoughtfully, 'I mean, if I could take SPEW further…'**

"Hermione will probably join the Department for the Control and Regulation of Magical Beings and get rights for house-elves and the like," predicted Lily. "Or go in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement."

**Harry and Ron carefully avoided looking at each other.**

**History of Magic was by common consent the most boring subject ever devised by wizardkind. Professor Binns, their ghost teacher, had a wheezy, droning voice that was almost guaranteed to cause severe drowsiness within ten minutes, five in warm weather. He never varied the form of their lessons, but lectured them without pausing while they took notes, or rather, gazed sleepily into space. Harry and Ron had so far managed to scrape passes in this subject only by copying Hermione's notes before exams; she alone seemed able to resist the soporific power of Binns's voice.**

"How does she do that?" wondered Lily. "I can't pay attention to Binns and end up just reading the book and taking notes."

"Well, Moony doesn't seem to have any trouble," said Peter. "So the rest of us Marauders copy his notes."

**Today, they suffered an hour and a half's droning on the subject of giant wars. Harry heard just enough within the first ten minutes to appreciate dimly that in another teacher's hands this subject might have been mildly interesting, **

"Yeah," sighed James. "Why can't Dumbledore get Binns to quit and hire someone else?"

"Maybe because nobody else wants the post and Dumbledore doesn't have to pay Binns," suggested Sirius. "Or he doesn't have the heart to convince Binns to quit."

**but then his brain disengaged, and he spent the remaining hour and twenty minutes playing hangman on a corner of his parchment with Ron, while Hermione shot them filthy looks out of the corner of her eye.**

**'How would it be,' she asked them coldly, as they left the classroom for break (Binns drifting away through the blackboard), 'if I refused to lend you my notes this year?'**

"She'd better not," exclaimed Sirius, sounding alarmed. "Imagine if Moony did that."

"Maybe I should," said Remus, half-teasing.

James gave him and Sirius a look. "Prehaps you've forgotten, but we've dropped History of Magic."

**'We'd fail our OWL,' said Ron. 'If you want that on your conscience, Hermione…'**

**'Well, you'd deserve it,' she snapped. 'You don't even try to listen to him, do you?'**

"I don't listen to him," said Lily. "I just read the book and take notes."

**'We do try' said Ron. 'We just haven't got your brains or your memory or your concentration ‐ you're just cleverer than we are ‐ is it nice to rub it in?'**

**'Oh, don't give me that rubbish,' said Hermione, but she looked slightly mollified as she led the way out into the damp courtyard.**

"Good," said Peter.

**A fine misty drizzle was falling, so that the people standing in huddles around the edges of the yard looked blurred at the edges. Harry, Ron and Hermione chose a secluded corner under a heavily dripping balcony, turning up the collars of their robes against the chilly September air and talking about what Snape was likely to set them in the first lesson of the year. **

"Probably something difficult, like the Polyjuice Potion," suggested Sirius.

"You don't make that until NEWT-level at the very least," pointed out Remus. "Though you do learn about it earlier."

**They had got as far as agreeing that it was likely to be something extremely difficult, just to catch them off guard after a two‐month holiday, when someone walked around the corner towards them.**

**'Hello, Harry!'**

**It was Cho Chang and, what was more, she was on her own again. This was most unusual: Cho was almost always surrounded by a gang of giggling girls; Harry remembered the agony of trying to get her by herself to ask her to the Yule Ball.**

James and Sirius chuckled over the memory of reading about it.

**'Hi,' said Harry, feeling his face grow hot. At least you're not covered in Stinksap this time, he told himself. Cho seemed to be thinking along the same lines.**

James and Sirius opened their mouths to tease Harry, but a look from Lily silenced them.

**'You got that stuff off, then?'**

**'Yeah,' said Harry, trying to grin as though the memory of their last meeting was funny as opposed to mortifying. 'So, did you… er… have a good summer?'**

**The moment he had said this he wished he hadn't ‐ Cedric had been Cho's boyfriend and the memory of his death must have affected her holiday almost as badly as it had affected Harry's. Something seemed to tauten in her face, but she said, 'Oh, it was all right, you know…**

**'Is that a Tornados badge?' Ron demanded suddenly, pointing to the front of Cho's robes, where a sky‐blue badge emblazoned with a double gold T was pinned. 'You don't support them, do you?'**

Lily groaned and snapped, "Ron, can't you see that Cho and Harry want to talk alone? So stop butting in!"

**'Yeah, I do,' said Cho.**

**'Have you always supported them, or just since they started winning the league?' said Ron, in what Harry considered an unnecessarily accusatory tone of voice.**

**'I've supported them since I was six,' said Cho coolly. 'Anyway… see you, Harry.'**

"Now look!" exclaimed Lily, annoyed. "You've annoyed Cho and she's walked away!"

**She walked away. Hermione waited until Cho was halfway across the courtyard before rounding on Ron.**

**'You are so tactless!'**

"I agree," said Lily, nettled. James kissed her, distracting her for a moment.

**'What? I only asked her if ‐ʹ**

**'Couldn't you tell she wanted to talk to Harry on her own?'**

**'So? She could've done, I wasn't stopping ‐ʹ**

"Well, if you hadn't interrupted, Cho and Harry would have kept talking!" snapped Lily, annoyed again.

**'Why on earth were you attacking her about her Quidditch team?'**

**'Attacking? I wasn't attacking her, I was only ‐ʹ**

**'Who cares if she supports the Tornados?'**

**'Oh, come on, half the people you see wearing those badges only bought them last season ‐ʹ**

"But what does that matter?" demanded Lily. "Cho and Harry wanted to have a nice conversation together, and you've ruined it, Ronald Weasley!"

**'But what does it matter!'**

**'It means they're not real fans, they're just jumping on the bandwagon ‐ʹ**

**'That's the bell,' said Harry dully, because Ron and Hermione were bickering too loudly to hear it. They did not stop arguing all the way down to Snape's dungeon, which gave Harry plenty of time to reflect that between Neville and Ron he would be lucky ever to have two minutes of conversation with Cho that he could look back on without wanting to leave the country.**

"On the other hand," said James brightly, "she did seek you out, Harry. She doesn't seem to think you're a liar or crazy or responsible for Cedric's death."

**And yet, he thought, as they joined the queue lining up outside Snape's classroom door, she had chosen to come and talk to him, hadn't she? She had been Cedric's girlfriend; she could easily have hated Harry for coming out of the Triwizard maze alive when Cedric had died, yet she was talking to him in a perfectly friendly way, not as though she thought him mad, or a liar, or in some horrible way responsible for Cedric's death… yes, she had definitely chosen to come and talk to him, and that made the second time in two days… and at this thought, Harry's spirits rose. **

"Good," said Sirius. "Think positively."

**Even the ominous sound of Snape's dungeon door creaking open did not puncture the small, hopeful bubble that seemed to have swelled in his chest. He filed into the classroom behind Ron and Hermione and followed them to their usual table at the back, where he sat down between Ron and Hermione and ignored the huffy, irritable noises now issuing from both of them.**

**'Settle down,' said Snape coldly, shutting the door behind him.**

**There was no real need for the call to order; the moment the class had heard the door close, quiet had fallen and all fidgeting stopped. Snape'****s mere presence was usually enough to ensure a class's silence.**

"Of course," said Sirius sarcastically.

**'Before we begin today's lesson,' said Snape, sweeping over to his desk and staring around at them all, 'I think it appropriate to remind you that next June you will be sitting an important examination, during which you will prove how much you have learned about the composition and use of magical potions. Moronic though some of this class undoubtedly are, I expect you to scrape an 'Acceptable' in your OWL, or suffer my… displeasure.'**

**His gaze lingered this time on Neville, who gulped.**

"Poor Neville," said Peter.

**'After this year, of course, many of you will cease studying with me,' Snape went on. 'I take only the very best into my NEWT Potions class, which means that some of us will certainly be saying goodbye.'**

**His eyes rested on Harry and his lip curled. Harry glared back, feeling a grim pleasure at the idea that he would be able to give up Potions after fifth year.**

"But if you plan to be an Auror, you're going to have to take Potions," pointed out Lily. "Which means you're going to have do well on your Potions OWL and put up with Snape for two more years."

**'But we have another year to go before that happy moment of farewell,' said Snape softly, 'so, whether or not you are intending to attempt NEWT, I advise all of you to concentrate your efforts upon maintaining the high pass level I have come to expect from my OWL student.  
Today we will be mixing a potion that often comes up at Ordinary Wizarding Level: the Draught of Peace, a potion to calm anxiety and soothe agitation. Be warned: if you are too heavy‐handed with the ingredients you will put the drinker into a heavy and sometimes irreversible sleep, so you will need to pay close attention to what you are doing.' On Harry's left, Hermione sat up a little straighter, her expression one of utmost attention. The ingredients and method ‐ʹ Snape flicked his wand ʹ‐ are on the blackboard ‐ʹ (they appeared there) ʹ‐ you will find everything you need —' he flicked his wand again ʹ‐ in the store cupboard —' (the door of the said cupboard sprang open) ʹ‐ you have an hour and a half… start.'**

**Just as Harry, Ron and Hermione had predicted, Snape could hardly have set them a more difficult, fiddly potion. The ingredients had to be added to the cauldron in precisely the right order and quantities; the mixture had to be stirred exactly the right number of times, firstly in clockwise, then in anti‐clockwise directions; the heat of the flames on which it was simmering had to be lowered to exactly the right level for a specific number of minutes before the final ingredient was added.**

"As expected," said Peter glumly. "Slughorn never set such difficult potions the first day of class."

**'A light silver vapour should now be rising from your potion,' called Snape, with ten minutes left to go.**

**Harry, who was sweating profusely, looked desperately around the dungeon. His own cauldron was issuing copious amounts of dark grey steam; Ron's was spitting green sparks. **

"At least Harry's potion is better than Ron's," said Remus brightly.

"That won't be any good with Snape as teacher," pointed out James.

**Seamus was feverishly prodding the flames at the base of his cauldron with the tip of his wand, as they seemed to be going out. The surface of Hermione's potion, however, was a shimmering mist of silver vapour, and as Snape swept by he looked down his hooked nose at it without comment, which meant he could find nothing to criticise.**

**At Harry's cauldron, however, Snape stopped, and looked down at it with a horrible smirk on his face.**

"Oh no," groaned James. Sirius picked up quill and pepared to add to his Snape list.

**'Potter, what is this supposed to be?'**

**The Slytherins at the front of the class all looked up eagerly; they loved hearing Snape taunt Harry.**

Sirius hastily added to the Slytherin list, then turned his attention back to the book.

**'The Draught of Peace,' said Harry tensely.**

**'Tell me, Potter,' said Snape softly, 'can you read?'**

"Of course Harry can!" snapped Sirius.

**Draco Malfoy laughed.**

**'Yes, I can,' said Harry, his fingers clenched tightly around his wand.**

**'Read the third line of the instructions for me, Potter.'**

**Harry squinted at the blackboard; it was not easy to make out the instructions through the haze of multi‐coloured steam now filling the dungeon.**

**"'Add powdered moonstone, stir three times counter‐clockwise, allow to simmer for seven minutes then add two drops of syrup of hellebore.'"**

**His heart sank. He had not added syrup of hellebore, but had proceeded straight to the fourth line of the instructions after allowing his potion to simmer for seven minutes.**

"Drat!" exclaimed James.

**'Did you do everything on the third line, Potter?'**

**'No,' said Harry very quietly.**

**'I beg your pardon?'**

**'No,' said Harry, more loudly. 'I forgot the hellebore.'**

**'I know you did, Potter, which means that this mess is utterly worthless. Evanesco.'**

**The contents of Harry's potion vanished; he was left standing foolishly beside an empty cauldron.**

"_What_!?!" demanded Lily. "How unfair!"

**'Those of you who have managed to read the instructions, fill one flagon with a sample of your potion, label it clearly with your name and bring it up to my desk for testing,' said Snape. **

"But Hermione seems to be the only one who produced a perfect potion!" protested Peter. "So why haven't you commented on the other potions! Some of them must be worse than Harry's."

**'Homework: twelve inches of parchment on the properties of moonstone and its uses in potion‐making, to be handed in on Thursday.'**

**While everyone around him filled their flagons, Harry cleared away his things, seething. His potion had been no worse than Ron's, which was now giving off a foul odour of bad eggs; or Neville's, which had achieved the consistency of just‐mixed cement and which Neville was now having to gouge out of his cauldron; yet it was he, Harry, who would be receiving zero marks for the day's work. **

"Snivellus is totally unfair," grumbled Sirius, adding to his list.

**He stuffed his wand back into his bag and slumped down on to his seat, watching everyone else march up to Snape's desk with filled and corked flagons. When at long last the bell rang, Harry was first out of the dungeon and had already started his lunch by the time Ron and Hermione joined him in the Great Hall The ceiling had turned an even murkier grey during the morning. Rain was lashing the high windows.**

**'That was really unfair,' said Hermione consolingly, sitting down next to Harry and helping herself to shepherd's pie. 'Your potion wasn't nearly as bad as Goyle's; when he put it in his flagon the whole thing shattered and set his robes on fire.'**

They all made noises of disgust and muttered angrily over the injustice.

**'Yeah, well,' said Harry, glowering at his plate, 'since when has Snape ever been fair to me?'**

"Maybe if you didn't prank and hex Snape so much and I had accepted his apology and remained his friend, Snape would be fairer!" snapped Lily, glaring at Sirius and James.

**Neither of the others answered; all three of them knew that Snape and Harry's mutual enmity had been absolute from the moment Harry had set foot in Hogwarts.**

**'I did think he might be a bit better this year,' said Hermione in a disappointed voice. 'I mean… you know…' she looked around carefully; there were half a dozen empty seats on either side of them and nobody was passing the table '… now he's in the Order and everything.'**

"Well, leopards don't change their spots," remarked Remus.

**'Poisonous toadstools don't change their spots,' said Ron sagely. 'Anyway I've always thought Dumbledore was cracked to trust Snape. Where's the evidence he ever really stopped working for You‐Know‐Who?'**

"Dumbledore must have evidence," said James. "Only he hasn't bothered to tell anyone."

**'I think Dumbledore's probably got plenty of evidence, even if he doesn't share it with you, Ron,' snapped Hermione.**

**'Oh, shut up, the pair of you,' said Harry heavily, as Ron opened his mouth to argue back. Hermione and Ron both froze, looking angry and offended. 'Can't you give it a rest?' said Harry. 'You're always having a go at each other, it's driving me mad.' And abandoning his shepherd's pie, he swung his schoolbag back over his shoulder and left them sitting there.**

**He walked up the marble staircase two steps at a time, past the many students hurrying towards lunch. The anger that had just flared so unexpectedly still blazed inside him, and the vision of Ron and Hermione's shocked faces afforded him a sense of deep satisfaction. Serve them right, he thought, why can't they give it a rest … bickering all the time… it's enough to drive anyone up the wall…**

"Well, for Ron and Hermione, it's perfectly natural," said Sirius. "They're arguing like an old married couple. It wouldn't surprise me if they got married one day."

**He passed the large picture of Sir Cadogan the knight on a landing; Sir Cadogan drew his sword and brandished it fiercely at Harry, who ignored him.**

**'Come back, you scurvy dog! Stand fast and fight!' yelled Sir Cadogan in a muffled voice from behind his visor, but Harry merely walked on and when Sir Cadogan attempted to follow him by running into a neighbouring picture, he was rebuffed by its inhabitant, a large and angry‐looking wolfhound.**

**Harry spent the rest of the lunch hour sitting alone underneath the trapdoor at the top of North Tower. Consequently, he was the first to ascend the silver ladder that led to Sybill Trelawney's classroom when the bell rang.**

**After Potions, Divination was Harry's least favourite class, which was due mainly to Professor Trelawney's habit of predicting his premature death every few lessons. **

"Why doesn't Dumbledore ever fire her and find a better teacher?" asked Sirius.

**A thin woman, heavily draped in shawls and glittering with strings of beads, she always reminded Harry of some kind of insect, with her glasses hugely magnifying her eyes. She was busy putting copies of battered leather‐bound books on each of the spindly little tables with which her room was littered when Harry entered the room, but the light cast by the lamps covered by scarves and the low‐burning, sickly‐scented fire was so dim she appeared not to notice him as he took a seat in the shadows. The rest of the class arrived over the next five minutes. Ron emerged from the trapdoor, looked around carefully, spotted Harry and made directly for him, or as directly as he could while having to wend his way between tables, chairs and overstuffed pouffes.**

**'Hermione and me have stopped arguing,' he said, sitting down beside Harry.**

**'Good,' grunted Harry.**

**'But Hermione says she thinks it would be nice if you stopped taking out your temper on us,' said Ron.**

**'I'm not ‐ʹ**

"Yes, you are, Harry James Potter," said Lily sternly.

**'I'm just passing on the message,' said Ron, talking over him. 'But I reckon she's right. It's not our fault how Seamus and Snape treat you.'**

**'I never said it ‐'  
'Good‐day,' said Professor Trelawney in her usual misty, dreamy voice, and Harry broke off, again feeling both annoyed and slightly ashamed of himself. 'And welcome back to Divination. I have, of course, been following your fortunes most carefully over the holidays, and am delighted to see that you have all returned to Hogwarts safely ‐ as, of course, I knew you would.**

**'You will find on the tables before you copies of _The Dream Oracle_, by Inigo Imago. Dream interpretation is a most important means of divining the future and one that may very probably be tested in your OWL. Not, of course, that I believe examination passes or failures are of the remotest importance when it comes to the sacred art of divination. If you have the Seeing Eye, certificates and grades matter very little. However, the Headmaster likes you to sit the examination, so…'**

**Her voice trailed away delicately, leaving them all in no doubt that Professor Trelawney considered her subject above such sordid matters as examinations.**

"Well, that's good," said Sirius. "If others thought the same, then there'd be one subject without any tests."

**'Turn, please, to the introduction and read what Imago has to say on the matter of dream interpretation. Then, divide into pairs. Use _The Dream Oracle_ to interpret each others most recent dreams. Carry on.'**

**The one good thing to be said for this lesson was that it was not a double period. By the time they had all finished reading the introduction of the book, they had barely ten minutes left for dream interpretation. At the table next to Harry and Ron, Dean had paired up with Neville, who immediately embarked on a long‐winded explanation of a nightmare involving a pair of giant scissors wearing his grandmother's best hat; Harry and Ron merely looked at each other glumly.**

**'I never remember my dreams,' said Ron, 'you say one.'**

**'You must remember one of them,' said Harry impatiently.**

**He was not going to share his dreams with anyone. He knew perfectly well what his regular nightmare about a graveyard meant, he did not need Ron or Professor Trelawney or the stupid** **_Dream Oracle_ to tell him.**

**'Well, I dreamed I was playing Quidditch the other night,' said Ron, screwing up his face in an effort to remember. 'What d'you reckon that means?'**

"That you like playing Quidditch, or that you want to," said James.

**'Probably that you're going to be eaten by a giant marshmallow or something,' said Harry, turning the pages of _The Dream Oracle_ without interest. It was very dull work looking up bits of dreams in the Oracle and Harry was not cheered up when Professor Trelawney set them the task of keping a dream diary for a month as homework. When the bell went, he and Ron led the way back down the ladder, Ron grumbling loudly.**

**"D'you realise how much homework we've got already? Binns set us a foot‐and‐a‐half‐long essay on giant wars, Snape wants a foot on the use of moonstones, and now we've got a month's dream diary from Trelawney! Fred and George weren't wrong about OWL year, were they? That Umbridge woman had better not give us any…"**

"From the sound of her, I think she might," said Peter glumly.

**When they entered the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom they found Professor Umbridge already seated at the teacher's desk, wearing the fluffy pink cardigan of the night before and the black velvet bow on top of her head. Harry was again reminded forcibly of a large fly perched unwisely on top of an even larger toad.**

**The class was quiet as it entered the room; Professor Umbridge was, as yet, an unknown quantity and nobody knew how strict a disciplinarian she was likely to be.**

**'Well, good afternoon!' she said, when finally the whole class had sat down.**

**A few people mumbled 'good afternoon' in reply.**

**"Tut, tut," said Professor Umbridge. "That won't do, now, will it? I should like you, please, to reply 'Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge'. One more time, please. Good afternoon, class!"**

James and Sirius snickered and Lily said in disgust, "They're not five-year olds. So stop talking to them like there were, Umbridge."

**'Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge,' they chanted back at her.**

**'There, now,' said Professor Umbridge sweetly. 'That wasn't too difficult, was it? Wands away and quills out, please.'**

**Many of the class exchanged gloomy looks; the order 'wands away' had never yet been followed by a lesson they had found interesting. **

"The fake Moody's lesson on the Unforgiveable Curses was interesting," pointed out Remus. "And that wasn't a practical lesson."

**Harry shoved his wand back inside his bag and pulled out quill, ink and parchment. Professor Umbridge opened her handbag, extracted her own wand, which was an unusually short one, and tapped the blackboard sharply with it; words appeared on the board at once: _Defence Against the Dark Arts A Return to Basic Principles_**

**'Well now, your teaching in this subject has been rather disrupted and fragmented, hasn't it?' stated Professor Umbridge, turning to face the class with her hands clasped neatly in front of her. 'The constant changing of teachers, many of whom do not seem to have followed any Ministry‐approved curriculum, has unfortunately resulted in your being far below the standard we would expect to see in your OWL year.'**

"Between Moony and the imposter Moody, I think you should be up to standard!" snapped Sirius.

**'You will be pleased to know, however, that these problems are now to be rectified. We will be following a carefully structured, theory‐centred, Ministry‐approved course of defensive magic this year. Copy down the following, please.'**

**She rapped the blackboard again; the first message vanished and was replaced by the 'Course Aims'.**

**._ Understanding the principles underlying defensive magic.  
_. _Learning to recognise situations in which defensive magic can legally be used.  
_. _Placing the use of defensive magic in a context for practical use._**

"Sounds boring," muttered Peter. "Will there be any practical lessons at all?"

**For a couple of minutes the room was full of the sound of scratching quills on parchment. When everyone had copied down Professor Umbridge's three course aims she asked, 'Has everybody got a copy of _Defensive Magical Theory_ by Wilbert Slinkhard?'**

**There was a dull murmur of assent throughout the class.**

**"I think we'll try that again," said Professor Umbridge. "When I ask you a question, I should like you to reply, 'Yes, Professor Umbridge', or 'No, Professor Umbridge'. So: has everyone got a copy of _Defensive Magical Theory_ by Wilbert Slinkhard?"**

**'Yes, Professor Umbridge,' rang through the room.**

**"Good," said Professor Umbridge. "I should like you to turn to page five and read 'Chapter One, Basics for Beginners'. There will be no need to talk."**

**Professor Umbridge left the blackboard and settled herself in the chair behind the teacher's desk, observing them all closely with those pouchy toad's eyes. Harry turned to page five of his copy of _Defensive Magical Theory_ and started to read.**

**It was desperately dull, quite as bad as listening to Professor Binns. **

"Umbridge is definitely going to be as useless a teacher as Lockhart," said James sourly. "Actually, she'll be worse, because Lockhart did have one interesting lesson, and he didn't force his students to read a boring book during class. His books had to have been interesting if they sold so well."

**He felt his concentration sliding away from him; he had soon read the same line half a dozen times without taking in more than the first few words. Several silent minutes passed. Next to him, Ron was absent‐mindedly turning his quill over and over in his fingers, staring at the same spot on the page. Harry looked right and received a surprise to shake him out of his torpor. Hermione had not even opened her copy of_ Defensive Magical Theory_. She was staring fixedly at Professor Umbridge with her hand in the air.**

"Excuse me?" asked Remus, looking surprised. "When was the last time Hermione ever neglected to read when told?"

"Like never," responded Lily. The others looked surprised as well.

**Harry could not remember Hermione ever neglecting to read when instructed to, or indeed resisting the temptation to open any book that came under her nose. He looked at her enquiringly, but she merely shook her head slightly to indicate that she was not about to answer questions, and continued to stare at Professor Umbridge, who was looking just as resolutely in another direction.**

**After several more minutes had passed, however, Harry was not the only one watching Hermione. The chapter they had been instructed to read was so tedious that more and more people were choosing to watch Hermione's mute attempt to catch Professor Umbridge's eye rather than struggle on with 'Basics for Beginners'.**

**When more than half the class were staring at Hermione rather than at their books, Professor Umbridge seemed to decide that she could ignore the situation no longer.**

**'Did you want to ask something about the chapter, dear?' she asked Hermione, as though she had only just noticed her.**

"Yeah right," muttered Sirius.

**'Not about the chapter, no,' said Hermione.**

**'Well, we're reading just now,' said Professor Umbridge, showing her small pointed teeth. 'If you have other queries we can deal with them at the end of class.'**

**'I've got a query about your course aims,' said Hermione.**

**Professor Umbridge raised her eyebrows.**

**'And your name is?'**

**'Hermione Granger,' said Hermione.**

**'Well, Miss Granger, I think the course aims are perfectly clear if you read them through carefully,' said Professor Umbridge in a voice of determined sweetness.**

**'Well, I don't,' said Hermione bluntly. 'There's nothing written up there about using defensive spells.'**

"True," said Sirius. "Is this class only going to be about the theory of Defense?"

**There was a short silence in which many members of the class turned their heads to frown at the three course aims still written on the blackboard.**

**'Using defensive spells?' Professor Umbridge repeated with a little laugh. 'Why, I can't imagine any situation arising in my classroom that would require you to use a defensive spell, Miss Granger. You surely aren't expecting to be attacked during class?'**

**'We're not going to use magic?' Ron exclaimed loudly.**

**'Students raise their hands when they wish to speak in my class, Mr.‐?'**

**'Weasley,' said Ron, thrusting his hand into the air.**

**Professor Umbridge, smiling still more widely, turned her back on him. Harry and Hermione immediately raised their hands too. Professor Umbridge's pouchy eyes lingered on Harry for a moment before she addressed Hermione.**

**'Yes, Miss Granger? You wanted to ask something else?'**

**'Yes,' said Hermione. 'Surely the whole point of Defence Against the Dark Arts is to practise defensive spells?'**

"Yes it is!" exclaimed Peter.

**'Are you a Ministry‐trained educational expert, Miss Granger?' asked Professor Umbridge, in her falsely sweet voice.**

**'No, but ‐'**

**"Well then, I'm afraid you are not qualified to decide what the 'whole point' of any class is. Wizards much older and cleverer than you have devised our new ****programme of study. You will be learning about defensive spells in a secure, risk‐free way ‐"**

**'What use is that?' said Harry loudly. 'If we're going to be attacked, it won't be in a ‐'**

**'Hand, Mr. Potter!' sang Professor Umbridge.**

**Harry thrust his fist in the air. Again, Professor Umbridge promptly turned away from him,**

"You can't ignore Harry!" exclaimed James angrily.

**but now several other people had their hands up, too.**

**'And your name is?' Professor Umbridge said to Dean.**

**'Dean Thomas.'**

**'Well, Mr. Thomas?'**

**'Well, it's like Harry said, isn't it?' said Dean. 'If we're going to be attacked, it won't be risk free.'**

**'I repeat,' said Professor Umbridge, smiling in a very irritating fashion at Dean, 'do you expect to be attacked during my classes?'**

"No, but what about real life?" demanded Remus. "What about out in the real world, where there's Voldemort and other dark wizards and creatures?"

**'No, but ‐'**

**Professor Umbridge talked over him. 'I do not wish to criticise the way things have been run in this school,' she said, an unconvincing smile stretching her wide mouth, 'but you have been exposed to some very irresponsible wizards in this class, very irresponsible indeed ‐ not to mention,' she gave a nasty little laugh, 'extremely dangerous half‐breeds.'**

"Okay, Lockhart and Quirrell were irresponsible, but you can't talk that way about Moony!" exclaimed James angrily. "He was the best Defense teacher ever!"

Remus smiled and said, "Thanks, James." Sirius pulled out the newly begun Umbridge list and added, "Insulting Moony" on it.

**'If you mean Professor Lupin,' piped up Dean angrily, 'he was the best we ever ‐'**

"Go Dean!" cheered Sirius. "Tell that foul Umbridge woman!"

**'Hand, Mr. Thomas! As I was saying ‐ you have been introduced to spells that have been complex, inappropriate to your age group and potentially lethal. You have been frightened into believing that you are likely to meet Dark attacks every other day ‐ʹ**

"The fake Moody didn't manage that," snapped Lily.

**'No we haven't,' Hermione said, 'we just ‐'**

**'Your hand is not up, Miss Granger!'**

**Hermione put up her hand. Professor Umbridge turned away from her.**

**'It is my understanding that my predecessor not only performed illegal curses in front of you, he actually performed them on you.'**

"Well, he was a maniac," said Remus. "Though he did teach them many things."

**'Well, he turned out to be a maniac, didn't he?' said Dean hotly. 'Mind you, we still learned loads.'**

**'Your hand is not up, Mr. Thomas!' trilled Professor Umbridge. 'Now, it is the view of the Ministry that a theoretical knowledge will be more than sufficient to get you through your examination, which, after all, is what school is all about. **

"And what happens when you get to the practical part in the Defense OWL?" inquired Lily.

**And your name is?' she added, staring at Parvati, whose hand had just shot up.**

**'Parvati Patil, and isn't there a practical bit in our Defence Against the Dark Arts OWL? Aren't we supposed to show that we can actually do the counter‐curses and things?'**

**'As long as you have studied the theory hard enough, there is no reason why you should not be able to perform the spells under carefully controlled examination conditions,' said Professor Umbridge dismissively.**

"Without practicing them beforehand?" asked James incredulously. Sirius added to the Umbridge list.

**'Without ever practising them beforehand?' said Parvati incredulously. 'Are you telling us that the first time we'll get to do the spells will be during our exam?'**

**'I repeat, as long as you have studied the theory hard enough ‐ʹ**

**'And what good's theory going to be in the real world?' said Harry loudly, his fist in the air again.**

**Professor Umbridge looked up.**

**'This is school, Mr. Potter, not the real world,' she said softly.**

"Prehaps not, but once you leave Hogwarts, you have to be prepared!" exclaimed Remus.

**'So we're not supposed to be prepared for what's waiting for us out there?'**

**There is nothing waiting out there, Mr. Potter.'**

**'Oh, yeah?' said Harry. His temper, which seemed to have been bubbling just beneath the surface all day, was reaching boiling point.**

**'Who do you imagine wants to attack children like yourselves?' enquired Professor Umbridge in a horribly honeyed voice.**

"Hmm, Voldemort comes to mind," said James sarcastically.

**'Hmm, let's think…' said Harry in a mock thoughtful voice. 'Maybe… Lord Voldemort?'**

**Ron gasped; Lavender Brown uttered a little scream; Neville slipped sideways off his stool. Professor Umbridge, however, did not flinch. She was staring at Harry with a grimly satisfied expression on her face.**

**'Ten points from Gryffindor, Mr. Potter.'**

"For telling the truth?" demanded Peter incredulously. Sirius added to the Umbridge list.

**The classroom was silent and still. Everyone was staring at either Umbridge or Harry.**

**'Now, let me make a few things quite plain.'**

**Professor Umbridge stood up and leaned towards them, her stubby‐fingered hands splayed on her desk.**

**'You have been told that a certain Dark wizard has returned from the dead ‐ʹ**

"Moldywart wasn't dead!" exclaimed Peter. "But he has returned to power!"

**'He wasn't dead,' said Harry angrily, 'but yeah, he's returned!'**

**'Mr‐Potter‐you‐have‐already‐lost‐your‐house‐ten‐points‐do‐not‐make‐matters‐worse‐for‐yourself,' said Professor Umbridge in one breath without looking at him. 'As I was saying, you have been informed that a certain Dark wizard is at large once again. This is a lie.'**

"It isn't a lie!" exclaimed Lily. "Harry and a bunch of Death Eaters saw him! Harry fought him and barely managed to escape with his life!"

**'It is NOT a lie!' said Harry. 'I saw him, I fought him!'**

**"Detention, Mr. Potter!" said Professor Umbridge triumphantly. **

"For telling the truth?" demanded Sirius. He added to the list, looking furious.

**"Tomorrow evening. Five o'clock. My office. I repeat, this is a lie. The Ministry of Magic guarantees that you are not in danger from any Dark wizard. If you are still worried, by all means come and see me outside class hours. If someone is alarming you with fibs about reborn Dark wizards, I would like to hear about it. I am here to help. I am your friend. **

"Yeah right," muttered Peter sarcastically.

**And now, you will kindly continue your reading. Page five, 'Basics for Beginners'."**

**Professor Umbridge sat down behind her desk. Harry, however, stood up. Everyone was staring at him; Seamus looked half‐scared, half‐fascinated.**

**'Harry, no!' Hermione whispered in a warning voice, tugging at his sleeve, but Harry jerked his arm out of her reach.**

**'So, according to you, Cedric Diggory dropped dead of his own accord, did he?' Harry asked, his voice shaking.**

**There was a collective intake of breath from the class, for none of them, apart from Ron and Hermione, had ever heard Harry talk about what had happened on the night Cedric had died. They stared avidly from Harry to Professor Umbridge, who had raised her eyes and was staring at him without a trace of a fake smile on her face.**

**'Cedric Diggory's death was a tragic accident,' she said coldly.**

"It was not!" shouted James. "It was murder!"

**'It was murder,' said Harry. He could feel himself shaking. He had hardly spoken to anyone about this, least of all thirty eagerly listening classmates. 'Voldemort killed him and you know it.'**

**Professor Umbridge's face was quite blank. For a moment, Harry thought she was going to scream at him. Then she said, in her softest, most sweetly girlish voice, 'Come here, Mr Potter, dear.'**

"What is she going to do?" asked Peter, sounding worried.

**He kicked his chair aside, strode around Ron and Hermione and up to the teacher's desk. He could feel the rest of the class holding its breath. He felt so angry he did not care what happened next.**

**Professor Umbridge pulled a small roll of pink parchment out of her handbag, stretched it out on the desk, dipped her quill into a bottle of ink and started scribbling, hunched over so that Harry could not see what she was writing. Nobody spoke. After a minute or so she rolled up the parchment and tapped it with her wand; it sealed itself seamlessly so that he could not open it.**

**'Take this to Professor McGonagall, dear,' said Professor Umbridge, holding out the note to him.**

**He took it from her without saying a word, turned on his heel and left the room, not even looking back at Ron and Hermione, slamming the classroom door shut behind him. He walked very fast along the corridor, the note to McGonagall clutched tight in his hand, and turning a corner walked slap into Peeves the poltergeist, a wide‐mouthed little man floating on his back in midair, juggling several inkwells.**

**'Why it's Potty Wee Potter!' cackled Peeves, allowing two of the inkwells to fall to the ground where they smashed and spattered the walls with ink; Harry jumped backwards out of the way with a snarl.**

"Now is not the time, Peeves," said James tiredly. "This is one time when you're annoying, not funny."

**'Get out of it, Peeves.'**

**'Oooh, Crackpot's feeling cranky,' said Peeves, pursuing Harry along the corridor, leering as he zoomed along above him. 'What is it this time, my fine Potty friend? Hearing voices? Seeing visions? Speaking in ‐ʹ Peeves blew a gigantic raspberry '— tongues?'**

**'I said, leave me ALONE!' Harry shouted, running down the nearest flight of stairs, but Peeves merely slid down the banister on his back beside him.**

**'Oh, most think he's barking, the potty wee lad, But some are more kindly and think he's just sad, But Peevesy knows better and says that he's mad —'**

"SHUT UP, PEEVES!" yelled Lily.

**'SHUT UP!'**

**A door to his left flew open and Professor McGonagall emerged from her office looking grim and slightly harassed.**

**'What on earth are you shouting about, Potter?' she snapped, as Peeves cackled gleefully and zoomed out of sight. 'Why aren't you in class?'**

**'I've been sent to see you,' said Harry stiffly.**

**'Sent? What do you mean, sent?'**

**He held out the note from Professor Umbridge. Professor McGonagall took it from him, frowning, slit it open with a tap of her wand, stretched it out and began to read. Her eyes zoomed from side to side behind their square spectacles as she read what Umbridge had written, and with each line they became narrower.**

"Oh no," muttered Sirius.

**'Come in here, Potter.'**

**He followed her inside her study. The door closed automatically behind him.**

**'Well?' said Professor McGonagall, rounding on him. 'Is this true?'**

**'Is what true?' Harry asked, rather more aggressively than he had intended. 'Professor?' he added, in an attempt to sound more polite.**

**'Is it true that you shouted at Professor Umbridge?'**

**'Yes,' said Harry.**

**'You called her a liar?'**

**'Yes.'**

**'You told her He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is back?'**

**'Yes.'**

**Professor McGonagall sat down behind her desk, watching Harry closely. Then she said, 'Have a biscuit, Potter.'**

"What?" they said at once, looking bewildered.

**'Have ‐ what?'**

**'Have a biscuit,' she repeated impatiently, indicating a tartan tin lying on top of one of the piles of papers on her desk. 'And sit down.'**

**There had been a previous occasion when Harry, expecting to be caned by Professor McGonagall, had instead been appointed by her to the Gryffindor Quidditch team. He sank into a chair opposite her and helped himself to a Ginger Newt, feeling just as confused and wrong‐footed as he had done on that occasion.**

"McGonagall's not mad at Harry, then," said James, surprised.

**Professor McGonagall set down Professor Umbridge's note and looked very seriously at Harry.**

**'Potter, you need to be careful.'**

**Harry swallowed his mouthful of Ginger Newt and stared at her. Her tone of voice was not at all what he was used to; it was not brisk, crisp and stern; it was low and anxious and somehow much more human than usual.**

**'Misbehaviour in Dolores Umbridge's class could cost you much more than house points and a detention.'**

**'What do you ‐?'**

**'Potter, use your common sense,' snapped Professor McGonagall, with an abrupt return to her usual manner. 'You know where she comes from, you must know to whom she is reporting.'**

"She's obviously reporting to the Ministry," said Remus.

**The bell rang for the end of the lesson. Overhead and all around came the elephantine sounds of hundreds of students on the move.**

**'It says here she's given you detention every evening this week, starting tomorrow,' Professor McGonagall said, looking down at Umbridge's note again.**

"Every evening this week!" exclaimed James, horrified. Sirius added to his list, but was so angry that he accidently made a large ink blot appear. He impatiently siphoned the blot away and continued writing.

**'Every evening this week!' Harry repeated, horrified. 'But, Professor, couldn't you ‐?'**

**'No, I couldn't,' said Professor McGonagall flatly.**

"I can't believe McGonagall isn't going to do anything!" protested Remus.

**'But ‐ʹ**

**'She is your teacher and has every right to give you detention. You will go to her room at five o'clock tomorrow for the first one. Just remember: tread carefully around Dolores Umbridge.'**

**'But I was telling the truth!' said Harry, outraged. 'Voldemort is back, you know he is; Professor Dumbledore knows he is ‐ʹ**

"We know!" exclaimed Lily. "But most of the Ministry refuses to believe it, so you're going to have to be careful, Harry!"

**'For heaven's sake, Potter!' said Professor McGonagall, straightening her glasses angrily (she had winced horribly when he had used Voldemort's name). 'Do you really think this is about truth or lies? It's about keeping your head down and your temper under control!'**

**She stood up, nostrils wide and mouth very thin, and Harry stood up, too.**

**'Have another biscuit,' she said irritably, thrusting the tin at him.**

**'No, thanks,' said Harry coldly.**

"Just take it," said Sirius. "McGonagall's trying to be nice."

**'Don't be ridiculous,' she snapped.**

**He took one.**

**'Thanks,' he said grudgingly.**

**'Didn't you listen to Dolores Umbridge's speech at the start‐of‐term feast, Potter?'**

"Not really," said James. "It was very boring."

**'Yeah,' said Harry. 'Yeah… she said… progress will be prohibited or… well, it meant that… that the Ministry of Magic is trying to interfere at Hogwarts.'**

**Professor McGonagall eyed him closely for a moment, then sniffed, walked around her desk and held open the door for him.**

**'Well, I'm glad you listen to Hermione Granger at any rate,' she said, pointing him out of her office.**

"She obviously understands Harry very well," said Remus with a slight smile.

"This chapter certainly was dismal," commented Lily. "Who wants to read next?"

James volunteered and took the book.


	13. Detention with Dolores

Author's note: I would like to thank tunfiskur for the help in writing this chapter. (Basically, tunfiskur wrote the comments and I made edits and some minor adjustments.) Happy Thanksgiving to those living in the United States.

Edit: I noticed that the words were running together in a number of places. I have now fixed this.

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN  
Detention with Dolores**

"I hate this chapter already," Sirius said. "No chapter that has the words detention or Dolores in them can be good for Harry!"

"Don't jump to conclusions," Remus said. "Maybe it'll go well, maybe we got the wrong impression of Umbridge." Everyone in the room stared at him as if he were crazy.

"Just trying to think positive," Remus muttered.

**Dinner in the Great Hall that night was not a pleasant experience for Harry. The news about his shouting match with Umbridge had travelled exceptionally fast, even by Hogwarts' standards. He heard whispers all around him as he sat eating between Ron and Hermione. The funny thing was that none of the whisperers seemed to mind him overhearing what they were saying about him. On the contrary, it was as though they were hoping he would get angry and start shouting again, so that they could hear his story first-hand**.

James, who had been holding Lily's hand as well as reading, yelped. "Don't squeeze it so tight!" he said.

"Sorry," Lily said apologetically. "Those kids just make me really angry!"

"You're squeezing my hand again," James whimpered.

"Sorry."

"**He says he saw Cedric Diggory murdered –," "He reckons he duelled with You-Know-Who –" "Come off it. Who does he think he's kidding?" "Pur-lease!" **

"**What I don't get," said Harry through clenched teeth, laying down his knife and fork (his hands were shaking too much to hold them steady), **

"All that rage isn't good for you Harry," Lily said.

"Look who's talking," Sirius muttered under his breath, not daring to say it loud enough for Lily to hear.

"**is why they all believed the story two months ago when Dumbledore told them?" **

"**The thing is, Harry, I'm not sure they did," said Hermione grimly. "Oh, let's get out of here." She slammed down her own knife and fork; Ron looked longingly at his half-finished apple pie but followed suit. People stared at them all the way out of the hall.**

"What are they staring at!" Sirius snapped at the book.

"Please let me read in peace, will you!" James said annoyed.

**"What d'you mean, you're not sure they believed Dumbledore?" Harry asked Hermione when they reached the first-floor landing.**

**"Look, you don't understand what it was like after it happened," said Hermione quietly. "You arrived back in the middle of the lawn clutching Cedric's dead body. None of us saw what happened in the maze, we just had Dumbledore's word for it what You-Know-Who had come back and killed Cedric and fought you."**

**"Which is the truth!" said Harry loudly.**

"You know, Harry's acting kind of like Moony does during that time of the month?" James remarked.

"Please don't call it that," Remus said. "The last time you did Bertha Jorkins heard and told everyone I was half-female."

**"I know it is, Harry, so will you please stop biting my head off?" said Hermione wearily. "It's just that before the truth could sink in, everyone went home for the summer, where they spent two months reading about how you're a nutcase and Dumbledore's going senile!"**

"There's one bright side to this," Lily said and smirked. "Rita Skeeter can't write one word about Harry or Dumbledore. Just imagine how annoyed she must be."

**Rain pounded on the windowpanes as they strode along the empty corridors back to Gryffindor tower. Harry felt as though his first day had lasted a week, but he still had a mountain of homework to do before bed. A dull pounding pain was developing over his right eye. He glanced out of a rain-washed window at the dark grounds as they turned into the Fat Lady's corridor. There was still no light in Hagrid's cabin.**

"When is Hagrid coming back!" Sirius exclaimed.

"He'll be back sometimes," Peter said, but he sounded like he was trying to convince himself just as much as Sirius.

**"Mimbulus mimbletonia," said Hermione, before the Fat Lady could ask. The portrait swung open to reveal the hole behind it and the three of them scrambled through it. The common room was almost empty; nearly everyone was still down at dinner. Crookshanks uncoiled himself from an armchair and trotted to meet them, purring loudly, and when Harry, Ron and Hermione took their three favourite chairs at the fireside he leapt lightly on to Hermione's lap and curled up there like a furry ginger cushion. Harry gazed into the flames, feeling drained and exhausted. "How can Dumbledore have let this happen?" Hermione cried suddenly, making Harry and Ron jump; Crookshanks leapt off her, looking affronted. She pounded the arms of her chair in fury, so that bits of stuffing leaked out of the holes. "How can he let that terrible woman teach us? And in our OWL year, too!"**

"Probably because no one else wanted the position," Lily said glumly.

"And if anyone did, the Ministry probably scared them off," Remus added.

"That too," Lily said.

**"Well, we've never had great Defence Against the Dark Arts teachers, have we?" said Harry.**

"Yes you have!" Sirius and James said at the same time.

"Moony was a great teacher!" Peter added. Remus blushed.

**"You know what it's like, Hagrid told us, nobody wants the job; they say it's jinxed."**

**"Yes, but to employ someone who's actually refusing to let us do magic! What's Dumbledore playing at?"**

**"And she's trying to get people to spy for her," said Ron darkly. "Remember when she said she wanted us to come and tell her if we hear anyone saying You-Know -Who is back?"**

**"Of course she's here to spy on us all, that's obvious, why else would Fudge have wanted her to come?" snapped Hermione.**

"Ah, they're pulling another James/Lily," Sirius said. Everyone looked at him.

"They're arguing," he explained. Lily and James looked insulted.

**"Don't start arguing again," said Harry wearily, as Ron opened his mouth to retaliate. "Can it e just let's just do that homework, get it out of the way?" They collected their schoolbags from a corner and returned to the chairs by the fire. People were coming back from dinner now. Harry kept his face averted from the portrait hole, but could still sense the stares he was attracting.**

"Even his fellow Gryffindors!" James cried.

"Remember Seamus?" Lily said. "And Lavender??

"They don't count as fellow Gryffindors anymore," James said. "And now neither do those people staring at Harry."

"**Shall we do Snape's stuff first?" said Ron, dipping his quill into his ink. "The properties of moonstone and its uses in potion-making," he muttered, writing the words across the top of his parchment as he spoke them. "There." He underlined the title, then looked up expectantly at Hermione. **

Everyone giggled (but if asked, the guys weren't giggling, they were emitting manly chuckles).

**"So, what are the properties of moonstone and its uses in potion-making?" But Hermione was not listening; she was squinting over into the far corner of the room, where Fred, George, and Lee Jordan were now sitting at the centre of a knot of innocent -looking first -years, all of whom were chewing something that seemed to have come out of a large paper bag that Fred was holding.**

"What!" Lily said. "They're testing their stuff on first years!" She looked outraged.

"There's nothing wrong with that," Sirius protested. "I'm sure they're paying them for the work.  
"But it's still wrong," Lily said. "Right James?"  
James' head snapped back to the book and he continued reading hastily.

**"No, I'm sorry, they've gone too far," she said, standing up and looking positively furious. "Come on, Ron."**

**"What?" said Ron, plainly playing for time. "No; come on, Hermione; we can 't tell them off for giving out sweets."**

"He just doesn't want to get involved in this," Lily frowned. "He's just like Remus!" Remus tried not to look guilty, Lily was right.

**"You know perfectly well that those are bits of nosebleed nougat or, or puking pastilles or -"**

**"Fainting fancies?" Harry suggested quietly. One by one, as though hit over the head with an invisible mallet, the first-years were slumping unconscious in their seats; some slid right on to the floor, others merely hung over the arms of their chairs, their tongues rolling out. Most of the people watching were laughing; Hermione, however, squared her shoulders and marched directly over to where Fred and George now stood with clipboards, closely observing the unconscious first-years.**

The Marauders almost laughed at that, but a glare from Lily quieted them.

**Ron rose halfway out of his chair, hovered uncertainly for a moment or two, then muttered to Harry, "She's got it under control," before sinking as low in his chair as his lanky frame permitted.**

"Just like Remus," Lily muttered.

**"That's enough!" Hermione said forcefully to Fred and George, both of whom looked up in mild surprise.**

**"Yeah, you're right," said George, nodding, this dosage looks strong enough, doesn't it?"**

**"I told you this morning, you can't test your rubbish on students!"**

**"We're paying them!" said Fred indignantly.**

**"I don't care, it could be dangerous!"**

**"Rubbish," said Fred. **

**"Calm down, Hermione, they're fine!" said Lee reassuringly as he walked from first-year to first -year, inserting purple sweets into their open mouths.**

**"Yeah, look, they're coming around now," said George. A few of the first-years were indeed stirring. Several looked so shocked to find themselves lying on the floor, or dangling off their chairs, that Harry was sure Fred and George had not warned them what the sweets were going to do.  
**Lily opened her mouth and looked like she was about to complain again, but closed her mouth when James looked tiredly at her.

**"Feel all right?" said George kindly to a small dark-haired girl lying at his feet.  
"I, think so," she said shakily.**

**"Excellent," said Fred happily, but the next second Hermione had snatched both his clipboard and the paper bag of fainting fancies from his hands.**

**"It is NOT excellent!"**

**"Course it is, they're alive, aren't they?" said Fred angrily.**

**"You can't do this, what if you made one of them really ill?"**

**"We're not going to make them ill, we've already tested them all on ourselves, this is just to see if everyone reacts the same."**

**"If you don't stop doing it, I'm going to-" **

**"Put us in detention?" said Fred, in an I'd-like-to-see-you-try-it-voice.**

**"Make us write lines?" said George, smirking. Onlookers all over the room were laughing. Hermione drew herself up to her full height; her eyes were narrowed and her bushy hair seemed to crackle with electricity.**

**"No," she said, her voice quivering with anger, "but I will write to your mother."**

"Ouch," James said. "That's harsh, even for Hermione."

**"You wouldn't," said George, horrified, taking a step back from her.**

**"Oh, yes, I would," said Hermione grimly. "I can't stop you eating the stupid things yourselves, but you're not to give them to the first-years." Fred and George looked thunderstruck. It was clear that as far as they were concerned, Hermione's threat was way below the belt. **

"It is!" Sirius exclaimed.

**With a last threatening look at them, she thrust Fred's clipboard and the bag of fancies back into his arms, and stalked back to her chair by the fire. Ron was down so low in his seat that his nose was roughly level with his knees. "Thank you for your support, Ron," Hermione said acidly.**

**"You handled it fine by yourself," Ron mumbled. **

**Hermione stared down at her blank piece of parchment for a few seconds, then said edgily, "Oh, it's no good, I can't concentrate now. I'm going to bed." She wrenched her bag open; Harry thought she was about to put her books away, but instead she pulled out two misshapen woolly objects, placed them carefully on a table by the fireplace, covered them with a few screwed-up bits of parchment and a broken quill and stood back to admire the effect.**

"Huh?" Everyone looked confused.

**"What in the name of Merlin are you doing?" said Ron, watching her as though fearful for her sanity."**

**"They're hats for house-elves," she said briskly, now stuffing her books back into her bag. "I made them over the summer. I'm a really slow knitter without magic but now I'm back at school I should be able to make lots more."**

"This is going too far," Peter said. "The house elves at Hogwarts are obviously treated well."

**"You're leaving out hats for the house-elves?" said Ron slowly. "And you're covering them up with rubbish first?"**

**"Yes," said Hermione defiantly, swinging her bag on to her back.**

**"That's not on," said Ron angrily. "You're trying to trick them into picking up the hats. You're setting them free when they might not want to be free."**

"You can't set them free," said Remus. "First of all, you're not their owner. Only the headmaster or headmistress can do that. Also, the house-elves have to be handed the clothes to be free. Laying them about for them to pick up doesn't count. Otherwise they wouldn't be able to do the laundry."

**"Of course they want to be free!" said Hermione at once, though her face was turning pink. "Don't you dare touch those hats, Ron!" She turned on her heel and left.**

**Ron waited until she had disappeared through the door to the girls' dormitories, then cleared the rubbish off the woolly hats. "They should at least see what they're picking up," he said firmly. "Anyway," he rolled up the parchment in which he had written the title of Snape's essay, "there's no point trying to finish this now, I can't do it without Hermione, I haven't got a clue what you're supposed to do with moonstones, have you?"**

"Those two would be long screwed if not for Hermione," Lily shook her head. "How come Harry couldn't inherit my interest for studying?'  
"My lazy genes are just much stronger," James said and grinned.

**Harry**** s****hook**** h****is**** h****ead,****noticing**** a****s**** h****e**** d****id**** s****o**** t****hat**** t****he**** a****che**** i****n**** h****is**** r****ight ****temple**** w****as ****getting**** w****orse.**** H****e ****thought**** o****f**** t****he ****long ****essay**** i****n**** g****iant**** w****ars**** a****nd**** t****he**** p****ain**** s****tabbed**** a****t**** h****im**** s****harply.**** K****nowing ****perfectly**** w****ell**** t****hat**** w****hen**** t****he**** m****orning**** c****ame,**** h****e**** w****ould**** r****egret**** n****ot ****f****inishing**** h****is ****homework**** t****hat**** n****ight,**** h****e**** p****iled**** h****is ****books ****back ****into**** h****is**** b****ag.  
**"I hate that feeling," James said.

"**I'm**** g****oing**** t****o**** b****ed****too." He**** p****assed**** S****eamus**** o****n**** t****he**** w****ay**** t****o**** t****he****door**** l****eading**** t****o**** t****he****dormitories,**** b****ut**** d****id**** n****ot**** l****ook**** a****t**** h****im.**** H****arry**** h****ad**** a f****leeting ****impression**** t****hat**** S****eamus**** h****ad**** o****pened**** h****is ****mouth**** t****o**** s****peak,**** b****ut**** h****e**** s****ped**** u****p**** a****nd**** r****eached**** t****he**** s****oothing**** p****eace**** o****f**** t****he**** s****tone**** s****piral**** s****taircase ****without ****having**** t****o ****endure ****any**** m****ore ****provocation.**  
"Do you think he was maybe going to apologize?" Lily said hopefully.

"Maybe," Sirius said. "They have been roommates for four years. I'm surprised Seamus ever believed the crap about Harry being a nut case."  
Everyone looked shocked at Sirius's words of wisdom. "That's right, I can be smart too," Sirius said.

**The**** f****ollowing**** d****ay**** d****awned ****just**** a****s ****leaden**** a****nd**** r****ainy**** a****s**** t****he**** p****revious**** o****ne.**** H****agrid**** w****as**** s****till**** a****bsent**** f****rom**** t****he****staff**** t****able**** a****t**** b****reakfast. "But**** o****n**** t****he**** p****lus**** s****ide,**** n****o**** S****nape**** t****oday," said**** R****on**** b****racingly. Hermione**** y****awned ****widely**** a****nd**** p****oured ****herself**** s****ome ****coffee.**** S****he ****looked ****wildly**** p****leased**** a****bout ****something,**** a****nd**** w****hen**** R****on**** a****sked**** h****er**** w****hat**** s****he**** h****ad**** t****o**** b****e**** s****o**** h****appy**** a****bout,**** s****he**** s****imply**** s****aid,**** "T****he**** h****ats**** h****ave**** g****one.**** S****eems**** t****he**** h****ouse****-****elves**** d****o**** w****ant ****freedom****after**** a****ll." **

"**I**** w****ouldn't**** b****et**** o****n**** i****t," Ron**** t****old**** h****er**** c****uttingly.**** "T****hey**** m****ight**** n****ot**** c****ount**** a****s**** c****lothes.**** T****hey**** d****idn't**** l****ook ****anything**** l****ike**** h****ats**** t****o**** m****e,**** m****ore**** l****ike**** w****oolly**** b****ladders."  
**"This'll make Hermione happy," Remus said sarcastically.

**Hermione**** d****id**** n****ot**** s****peak**** t****o**** h****im**** a****ll**** m****orning. Double**** C****harms**** w****as**** s****ucceeded**** b****y**** D****ouble**** T****ransfiguration.**** P****rofessor**** F****litwick**** a****nd**** P****rofessor**** M****cGonagall**** b****oth**** s****pent**** t****he ****first ****fifteen ****minutes**** o****f**** t****heir**** l****essons**** l****ecturing**** t****he**** c****lass**** o****n**** t****he**** im****portance**** o****f**** O****WLs.**  
"Boring," Sirius said. "I remember those speeches. Do you think they have changed at all?"  
**"What**** y****ou**** m****ust ****remember," said little**** P****rofessor**** F****litwick**** s****queakily,**** p****erched**** a****s ****ever**** o****n**** a p****ile**** o****f**** b****ooks**** s****o**** t****hat**** h****e**** c****ould**** s****ee**** o****ver**** t****he**** t****op**** o****f**** h****is ****desk, "is**** t****hat**** t****hese ****examinations**** m****ay ****i****nfluence**** y****our ****futures**** f****or**** m****any**** y****ears**** t****o**** c****ome!**** I****f**** y****ou**** h****ave**** n****ot ****already**** g****iven ****serious ****thought**** t****o**** y****our ****careers,**** n****ow**** i****s**** t****he**** t****ime**** t****o**** d****o**** s****o.**** A****nd**** i****n**** t****he**** m****eantime, ****I'****m**** a****fraid,**** w****e**** s****hall**** b****e ****working ****harder**** t****han**** e****ver**** t****o ****ensure**** t****hat**** y****ou****'****ll**** d****o**** y****ourselves**** j****ustice!"  
**"Nope," everyone answered.

**They**** t****hen**** s****pent**** o****ver**** a****n**** h****our**** r****evising**** S****ummoning**** C****harms,**** w****hich**** a****ccording**** t****o**** P****rofessor ****F****litwick were bound ****t****o ****c****ome ****up****i****n ****t****heir ****O****WL, ****a****nd ****h****e ****r****ounded ****o****ff ****t****he ****l****esson ****b****y ****s****etting**** t****hem**** t****heir**** l****argest**** e****ver**** a****mount**** o****f**** C****harms homework. It**** w****as**** t****he**** s****ame,**** i****f**** n****ot**** w****orse,**** i****n**** T****ransfiguration. **

"**You**** c****annot**** p****ass**** a****n**** O****WL," said****Professor**** M****cGonagall**** g****rimly, "without**** s****erious ****application, ****practice**** a****nd**** s****tudy. I**** s****ee**** n****o ****reason ****why**** e****verybody**** i****n**** t****his**** c****lass should**** n****ot**** a****chieve**** a****n ****O****WL**** i****n**** T****ransfiguration**** a****s**** l****ong**** a****s**** t****hey**** p****ut**** i****n**** t****he**** w****ork." Neville**** m****ade**** a s****ad**** l****ittle**** d****isbelieving ****noise. "Yes,**** y****ou**** t****oo,**** L****ongbottom," said**** P****rofessor**** M****cGonagall.**** "T****here is**** n****othing**** w****rong**** w****ith**** y****our**** w****ork**** e****xcept**** l****ack**** o****f**** c****onfidence."  
**"How sweet of her," Lily said happily. The Marauders snickered. A sweet McGonagall was hard to imagine.

"**So****today**** w****e**** a****re**** s****tarting**** V****anishing**** s****pells.**** T****hese**** a****re**** e****asier**** t****han**** c****onjuring**** s****pells,**** w****hich**** y****ou**** w****ould**** n****ot**** u****sually**** a****ttempt**** u****ntil**** N****EWT**** l****evel,**** b****ut**** t****hey**** a****re**** s****till**** a****mong**** t****he**** m****ost**** d****ifficult**** m****agic**** y****ou**** w****ill**** b****e**** t****ested**** o****n**** i****n**** y****our**** O****WL." She**** w****as**** q****uite**** r****ight;**** H****arry**** f****ound**** t****he**** V****anishing**** s****pells**** h****orribly**** d****ifficult.**** B****y**** t****he**** e****nd of**** a d****ouble**** p****eriod****, n****either**** h****e**** n****or**** R****on**** h****ad**** m****anaged**** t****o**** V****anish**** t****he**** s****nails**** i****n**** w****hich**** t****hey**** w****ere**** p****ractising,**** t****hough**** R****on**** s****aid**** h****opefully**** h****e**** t****hought**** h****is**** l****ooked**** a b****it**** p****aler.  
**James looked a bit disappointed. Even though Harry had shown again and again that he had not inherited his father's extraordinary talent for Transfiguration, James had hoped Harry would do better on the Vanishing spell, the spell he was the best at himself.

**Hermione,**** o****n**** t****he**** o****ther**** h****and,**** s****uccessfully**** v****anished**** h****er**** s****nail**** o****n**** t****he**** t****hird**** a****ttempt, ****e****arning**** h****er**** a t****en****-****point**** b****onus**** f****or**** G****ryffindor**** f****rom**** P****rofessor ****M****cGonagall.**** S****he**** w****as**** t****he**** o****nly**** p****erson**** n****ot**** g****iven**** h****omework;**** e****verybody**** e****lse**** w****as**** t****old**** t****o**** p****ractise**** t****he**** s****pell**** o****vernight,**** r****eady**** f****or**** a f****resh**** a****ttempt**** o****n**** t****heir**** s****nails**** t****he**** f****ollowing**** a****fternoon. Now**** p****anicking**** s****lightly**** a****bout**** t****he**** a****mount**** o****f**** h****omework**** t****hey**** h****ad**** t****o**** d****o, ****H****arry**** a****nd**** R****on**** s****pent**** t****heir**** l****unch**** h****our**** i****n**** t****he**** l****ibrary**** l****ooking**** u****p**** t****he**** u****ses**** o****f**** m****oonstones**** i****n**** p****otion****-****making.**** S****till**** a****ngry**** a****bout**** R****on's**** s****lur**** o****n**** h****er**** w****oolly**** h****ats,**** H****ermione**** d****id**** n****ot**** j****oin**** t****hem.**** B****y**** t****he**** t****ime**** t****hey**** r****eached**** C****are**** o****f**** M****agical**** C****reatures**** i****n**** t****he**** a****fternoon,**** H****arry's**** h****ead**** w****as**** a****ching**** a****gain.  
**"Poor Harry," Lily said and rubbed the book's pages softly, as if trying to relieve Harry of his headache that way.

**The**** d****ay**** h****ad**** b****ecome**** c****ool**** a****nd**** b****reezy,**** a****nd**** a****s**** t****hey**** w****alked**** d****own**** t****he**** s****loping**** l****awn**** t****owards**** H****agrid's**** c****abin**** o****n**** t****he**** e****dge**** o****f**** t****he ****forbidden ****forest,**** t****hey ****felt**** t****he ****occasional**** d****rop**** o****f**** r****ain**** i****n**** t****heir**** f****aces.**** P****rofessor ****G****rubbly****-****Plank**** s****tood**** w****aiting**** f****or**** t****he**** c****lass****some**** t****en**** y****ards**** f****rom**** H****agrid's ****front ****door,**** a ****long ****trestle**** ta****ble**** i****n ****front**** o****f**** h****er**** l****aden**** w****ith**** t****wigs.**** A****s**** H****arry ****and**** R****on**** r****eached**** h****er,**** a ****loud ****shout**** o****f ****laughter ****sounded ****behind**** t****hem;****turning,**** t****hey**** s****aw**** D****raco**** M****alfoy ****striding ****towards**** t****hem,****surrounded**** b****y**** h****is ****usual**** g****ang**** o****f**** S****lytherin ****cronies.**  
Sirius made a rude hand gesture, and the others looked annoyed at Malfoy.

**He**** h****ad ****clearly ****just**** s****aid ****something ****highly**** a****musing, ****because**** C****rabbe,**** G****oyle,**** P****ansy**** P****arkinson****, a****nd**** t****he**** r****est ****continued**** t****o**** s****nigger**** h****eartily**** a****s**** t****hey ****gathered**** a****round**** t****he ****trestle**** t****able ****and,****judging**** b****y**** t****he**** w****ay**** t****hey**** a****ll ****kept ****looking ****over**** a****t**** H****arry,**** h****e**** w****as ****able**** t****o****guess** **t****he ****subject**** o****f**** t****he**** j****oke ****without**** t****oo**** m****uch ****difficulty.  
**Sirius continued with the hand gesture and added some new ones, waving his hands around so dramatically that his fingers poked in Peter's eyes. "Ouch!"  
"Sorry, Pete."  
**"Everyone**** h****ere?" barked**** P****rofessor**** G****rubbly****-****Plank,**** o****nce**** a****ll**** t****he**** S****lytherins ****and**** G****ryffindors**** h****ad****arrived. "Let's**** start i****n**** t****hen.**** W****ho**** c****an**** t****ell**** m****e**** w****hat ****these ****things**** a****re****called?" She ****indicated**** t****he**** h****eap**** o****f**** t****wigs**** i****n****front**** o****f**** h****er.**** H****ermione's**** h****and**** s****hot**** i****nto**** t****he**** a****ir.**** B****ehind**** h****er**** b****ack, ****M****alfoy**** d****id**** a b****uck****-****toothed ****imitation**** o****f**** h****er ****jumping**** u****p****and**** d****own**** i****n**** e****agerness**** t****o****answer**** a q****uestion.**  
This time, Peter shielded his eyes while Sirius made the gestures again.

**Pansy****Parkinson**** g****ave**** a ****shriek**** o****f**** l****aughter**** t****hat ****turned****almost**** a****t**** o****nce****into**** a s****cream,**** a****s**** t****he**** t****wigs**** o****n**** t****he**** t****able ****leapt**** i****nto**** t****he**** a****ir ****and ****revealed**** t****hemselves**** t****o**** b****e**** w****hat**** l****ooked ****like**** t****iny**** p****ixie****-****ish ****creatures**** m****ade**** o****f**** w****ood,**** e****ach ****with**** k****nobbly ****brown ****arms****and**** l****egs,**** t****wo**** t****wiglike**** f****ingers**** a****t**** t****he**** e****nd**** o****f**** e****ach**** h****and**** a****nd**** a ****funny**** f****lat,**** b****arklike**** f****ace**** i****n ****which ****a pair o****f**** b****eetle****-****brown**** e****yes**** g****littered. "Oooooh!"**** s****aid**** P****arvati**** a****nd**** L****avender,**** t****horoughly ****irritating**** H****arry.**** A****nyone**** w****ould**** h****ave ****thought**** H****agrid**** h****ad**** n****ever**** s****hown**** t****hem ****impressive ****creatures;****admittedly,**** t****he**** f****lobberworms**** h****ad**** b****een**** a b****it**** d****ull,**** b****ut**** t****he ****salamanders ****and**** h****ippogriffs**** h****ad**** b****een ****interesting**** e****nough,****and**** t****he**** B****last****-****Ended**** S****krewts ****perhaps**** t****oo**** m****uch**** s****o.  
**"Those would have been so perfect to set loose in the Slytherin common  
room," Sirius said dreamily and James nodded in agreement.

"**Kindly ****keep**** y****our**** v****oices**** d****own,****girls!" said**** P****rofessor ****G****rubbly****-****Plank**** s****harply,**** s****cattering**** a h****andful**** o****f**** w****hat ****looked ****like ****brown**** r****ice**** a****mong**** t****he**** s****tick****-****creatures,**** w****ho ****immediately**** f****ell**** u****pon**** t****he**** f****ood. "So, anyone**** k****now**** t****he**** n****ames**** o****f ****these****c reatures?**** M****iss**** G****ranger?" **

**"Bowtruckles,"**** s****aid**** H****ermione.**** "T****hey're**** t****ree****-****guardians,**** u****sually**** l****ive**** i****n**** w****and****-****trees."  
**"I remember those," James said. "They tried to poke my eyes out. It was one of the few times I was glad I need glasses."

**"Five**** p****oints**** f****or**** G****ryffindor,"**** s****aid**** P****rofessor**** G****rubbly****-****Plank. "Yes, ****these**** a****re**** b****owtruckles,**** a****nd**** a****s**** M****iss**** G****ranger**** r****ightly**** s****ays,**** t****hey**** g****enerally live**** i****n**** t****rees**** w****hose**** w****ood**** i****s**** o****f**** w****and**** q****uality.**** A****nybody**** k****now**** w****hat**** t****hey**** e****at?"**

"**Woodlice," said**** H****ermione**** p****romptly ****which**** e****xplained**** w****hy**** w****hat**** H****arry**** h****ad**** t****aken**** t****o**** b****e**** g****rains**** o****f ****brown**** r****ice**** w****ere**** m****oving. "But**** f****airy**** e****ggs**** i****f**** t****hey**** c****an**** g****et**** t****hem."**

"**Good**** g****irl,**** t****ake**** a****nother**** f****ive**** p****oints.**** S****o,**** w****henever**** y****ou**** n****eed**** l****eaves**** o****r**** w****ood**** f****rom**** a t****ree**** i****n ****which**** a b****owtruckle**** l****odges,**** i****t**** i****s**** w****ise**** t****o**** h****ave**** a g****ift**** o****f**** w****oodlice**** r****eady**** t****o**** d****istract**** o****r**** p****lacate**** i****t.**** T****hey**** m****ay**** n****ot**** l****ook**** d****angerous,**** b****ut ****i****f**** a****ngered**** t****hey**** w****ill**** t****ry**** t****o**** g****ouge**** a****t**** h****uman**** e****yes ****with**** t****heir**** f****ingers,****which,**** a****s**** y****ou**** c****an**** s****ee,**** a****re**** v****ery**** s****harp**** a****nd**** n****ot**** a****t**** a****ll**** d****esirable**** n****ear**** t****he**** e****yeballs. ****S****o**** i****f**** y****ou'd ****like**** t****o**** g****ather**** c****loser,**** t****ake**** a f****ew**** w****oodlice**** a****nd**** a b****owtruckle?**** I h****ave**** e****nough**** h****ere**** f****or**** o****ne**** b****etween**** t****hree. You**** c****an**** s****tudy ****t****hem more closely. ****I w****ant ****a s****ketch ****f****rom ****e****ach ****o****f ****y****ou with ****a****ll ****b****ody parts ****l****abelled ****b****y ****t****he ****e****nd ****o****f**** t****he**** l****esson."**  
"Sounds boring," Sirius remarked.

"It is not!" snapped Lily.

**The ****c****lass**** s****urged**** f****orwards**** a****round**** t****he**** t****restle**** t****able.**** H****arry ****deliberately ****circled**** a****round**** t****he**** b****ack**** s****o**** t****hat**** h****e ****ended**** u****p****right**** n****ext**** t****o**** P****rofessor**** G****rubbly****-****Plank. "Where's**** H****agrid?" ****h****e**** a****sked**** h****er,**** w****hile ****everyone**** e****lse**** w****as****choosing**** b****owtruckles.**

"**Never**** y****ou**** m****ind," said**** P****rofessor**** G****rubbly****-****Plank**** r****epressively,**** w****hich**** h****ad**** b****een**** h****er ****attitude**** l****ast**** t****ime**** H****agrid**** h****ad**** f****ailed**** t****o**** t****urn**** u****p**** f****or**** a c****lass,**** t****oo.**** S****mirking**** a****ll**** o****ver**** h****is ****pointed**** f****ace, Draco**** M****alfoy**** l****eaned**** a****cross**** H****arry**** a****nd**** s****eized**** t****he ****largest**** b****owtruckle.**

"**Maybe," said**** M****alfoy**** i****n**** a****n ****undertone,**** s****o**** t****hat**** o****nly**** H****arry**** c****ould**** h****ear**** h****im, "the**** s****tupid**** g****reat**** o****af's**** g****ot ****himself**** b****adly****injured."**

"**Maybe**** y****ou**** w****ill**** i****f**** y****ou**** d****on't**** s****hut**** u****p," said ****H****arry**** o****ut**** o****f**** t****he**** s****ide**** o****f**** h****is**** m****outh.**

"Is he trying to mess up with Harry's head?" James said angrily.

"Maybe, but he might be onto something too," Lily said.

"How do you figure that?" James asked.

"I read a few paragraphs ahead," Lily said sheepishly.

"**Maybe**** h****e's**** b****een**** m****essing**** w****ith**** s****tuff**** t****hat's**** t****oo**** b****ig**** f****or**** h****im,**** i****f**** y****ou**** g****et**** m****y**** d****rift." Malfoy**** w****alked**** a****way,**** s****mirking**** o****ver**** h****is**** s****houlder**** a****t**** H****arry,**** w****ho**** f****elt**** s****uddenly**** s****ick.**** D****id**** M****alfoy**** k****now**** s****omething? His**** f****ather**** w****as**** a D****eath**** E****ater****, a****fter**** a****ll;**** w****hat**** i****f**** h****e**** h****ad**** i****nformation**** a****bout**** H****agrid's**** f****ate**** t****hat**** h****ad**** n****ot**** y****et**** r****eached**** t****he**** e****ars**** o****f**** t****he**** O****rder? He**** h****urried**** b****ack**** a****round**** t****he**** t****able**** t****o**** R****on**** a****nd**** H****ermione****, w****ho**** w****ere**** s****quatting**** i****n**** t****he**** g****rass**** s****ome**** d****istance**** a****way**** a****nd**** a****ttempting**** t****o**** p****ersuade**** a b****owtruckle**** t****o**** r****emain**** s****till**** l****ong**** e****nough**** f****or**** t****hem**** t****o**** d****raw**** i****t.**** H****arry**** p****ulled**** o****ut**** p****archment**** a****nd**** q****uill,**** c****rouched**** d****own**** b****eside**** t****he**** o****thers**** a****nd**** r****elated**** i****n**** a w****hisper**** w****hat**** M****alfoy**** h****ad**** j****ust**** s****aid. **

"**Dumbledore**** w****ould**** k****now**** i****f**** s****ome****t****hing**** h****ad**** h****appened**** t****o**** H****agrid," said**** H****ermione**** a****t**** o****nce. "It's**** j****ust**** p****laying**** i****nto**** M****alfoy's**** h****ands**** t****o**** l****ook**** w****orried;**** i****t**** t****ells**** h****im**** w****e**** d****on't**** k****now**** e****xactly**** w****hat's**** g****oing**** o****n.**** W****e've**** g****ot**** t****o**** i****gnore**** h****im,**** H****arry.**** H****ere,**** h****old**** t****he**** b****owtruckle**** f****or**** a m****oment,**** j****ust**** s****o**** I c****an**** d****raw**** i****ts**** f****ace?"**  
"Clever of Hermione, distracting him," Remus said. "It wouldn't be good if Harry exploded again in the middle of class. It would only make him look even crazier."

"**Yes," came**** M****alfoy's**** c****lear**** d****rawl**** f****rom**** t****he**** g****roup**** n****earest**** t****hem, "Father**** w****as**** t****alking**** t****o**** t****he**** M****inister**** j****ust**** a c****ouple**** o****f**** d****ays**** a****go,**** y****ou**** k****now,**** a****nd**** i****t**** s****ounds**** a****s**** t****hough**** t****he**** M****inistry's**** r****eally**** d****etermined**** t****o**** c****rack**** d****own**** o****n**** s****ubstandard**** t****eaching**** i****n**** t****his**** p****lace. So even**** i****f**** t****hat**** o****vergrown**** m****oron**** d****oes**** s****how**** u****p**** a****gain,**** h****e'll**** p****robably**** b****e**** s****ent**** p****acking**** s****traightaway."**  
James and Sirius, and Lily for that matter, were all fuming. Remus and Peter eyed their friends warily.

"**OUCH!" Harry**** h****ad**** g****ripped**** t****he**** b****owtruckle**** s****o**** h****ard**** t****hat**** i****t**** h****ad**** a****lmost**** s****napped,**** a****nd**** i****t**** h****ad**** j****ust**** t****aken**** a g****reat**** r****etaliatory**** s****wipe**** a****t**** h****is**** h****and**** w****ith**** i****ts**** s****harp**** f****ingers,**** l****eaving**** t****wo**** l****ong**** d****eep**** c****uts**** t****here.**** H****arry**** d****ropped**** i****t.**** C****rabbe**** a****nd**** G****oyle,**** w****ho**** h****ad**** a****lready**** b****een**** g****uffawing**** a****t**** t****he**** i****dea**** o****f**** H****agrid**** b****eing**** s****acked,**** l****aughed**** s****till**** h****arder**** a****s**** t****he**** b****owtruckle**** s****et**** o****ff**** a****t**** f****ull****kilt**** t****owards**** t****he**** f****orest,**** a l****ittle**** m****oving**** s****tick****-****man**** s****oon**** s****wallowed**** u****p**** a****mong**** t****he**** t****ree**** r****oots.**** W****hen**** t****he**** b****ell**** e****choed**** d****istantly**** o****ver**** t****he**** g****rounds,****" H****arry**** r****olled**** u****p**** h****is**** b****lood****-****stained**** b****owtruckle**** p****icture**** a****nd**** m****arched**** o****ff to**** H****erbology**** w****ith**** h****is**** h****and**** w****rapped**** i****n**** H****ermione's**** h****andkerchief,**** a****nd**** M****alfoy's**** d****erisive**** l****aughter**** s****till**** r****inging**** i****n**** h****is**** e****ars. **

"**If**** h****e**** c****alls**** H****agrid**** a m****oron**** o****ne**** m****ore**** t****ime," said**** H****arry****through****gritted**** t****eeth.**

"**Harry,**** d****on't**** g****o**** p****icking**** a r****ow**** w****ith**** M****alfoy,**** d****on't****forget, he's**** a p****refect**** n****ow,**** h****e**** c****ould**** m****ake**** l****ife****difficult**** f****or****you."**

"**Wow,**** I w****onder**** w****hat**** i****t'd**** b****e****like**** t****o**** h****ave ****a ****difficult**** l****ife?" said**** H****arry****sarcastically.**  
The Marauders and Lily all looked saddened at that, each feeling like it was their own fault that Harry felt this way.

Ron laughed, but Hermione frowned. Together, they traipsed across the vegetable patch. **T****he**** s****ky**** s****till ****appeared**** u****nable**** t****o**** m****ake**** u****p**** i****ts**** m****ind ****whether**** i****t**** w****anted**** t****o**** r****ain**** o****r ****not. "I**** j****ust**** w****ish**** H****agrid ****would ****hurry**** u****p****and**** g****et**** b****ack,**** t****hat's**** a****ll," said**** H****arry**** i****n**** a l****ow**** v****oice,**** a****s**** t****hey**** r****eached**** t****he**** g****reenhouses. "And**** d****on't**** s****ay**** t****hat**** G****rubbly****-****Plank**** w****oman's**** a b****etter ****teacher!" he ****added ****threateningly.**

"**I**** w****asn't****going**** t****o," said**** H****ermione**** c****almly.**

"**Because ****s****he'll**** n****ever**** be a****s ****good**** a****s**** H****agrid," said**** H****arry ****firmly,**** f****ully**** a****ware**** t****hat**** h****e**** h****ad**** j****ust**** e****xperienced**** a****n**** e****xemplary**** C****are**** o****f**** M****agical**** C****reatures**** l****esson ****and**** w****as ****thoroughly ****annoyed**** a****bout**** i****t.**  
"He's really too stubborn," Lily said.

"I wonder where he got that from," James asked. Lily glared at him.

**The**** d****oor**** o****f**** t****he**** n****earest ****greenhouse**** o****pened ****and**** s****ome**** f****ourth****-****years**** s****pilled**** o****ut**** o****f**** i****t,**** i****ncluding**** G****inny. "Hi," she**** s****aid**** b****rightly**** a****s**** s****he**** p****assed.**

**A f****ew**** s****econds**** l****ater,**** L****una**** L****ovegood**** e****merged,**** t****railing****behind**** t****he**** r****est**** o****f**** t****he**** c****lass,**** a s****mudge**** o****f****earth**** o****n**** h****er**** n****ose,****and**** h****er**** h****air**** t****ied**** i****n**** a k****not**** o****n**** t****he**** t****op**** o****f**** h****er****head.**** W****hen**** s****he**** s****aw**** H****arry,**** h****er**** p****rominent**** e****yes ****seemed**** t****o**** b****ulge**** e****xcitedly**** a****nd**** s****he**** m****ade**** a b****eeline**** s****traight**** f****or ****him.**** M****any**** o****f**** h****is**** c****lassmates**** t****urned**** c****uriously**** t****o**** w****atch.**

**L****una**** t****ook**** a ****great****breath****and**** t****hen**** s****aid, ****without**** s****o ****much**** a****s**** a ****preliminary**** h****ello, "I**** b****elieve**** H****e****-W****ho****-M****ust****-N****ot****-B****e****-N****amed**** i****s**** b****ack**** a****nd ****I b****elieve**** y****ou**** f****ought ****him ****and ****escaped**** f****rom ****him."**  
"That's nice of her," Lily said and smiled.

"**Er, right," said**** H****arry ****awkwardly.**** L****una**** w****as**** w****earing**** w****hat ****l****ooked ****like**** a p****air**** o****f**** o****range ****radishes**** f****or ****earrings,**** a f****act**** t****hat**** P****arvati**** a****nd**** L****avender**** s****eemed**** t****o**** h****ave**** n****oticed,**** a****s**** t****hey**** w****ere ****both ****giggling ****and ****pointing**** a****t**** h****er****earlobes.**

"**You**** c****an**** l****augh," Luna**** s****aid,**** h****er ****voice ****rising,****apparently ****under**** t****he ****impression**** t****hat**** P****arvati**** a****nd**** L****avender**** w****ere ****laughing**** a****t**** w****hat**** s****he**** h****ad**** s****aid**** r****ather**** t****han**** w****hat she**** w****as**** w****earing, "but**** p****eople**** u****sed**** t****o ****believe**** t****here**** w****ere**** n****o ****such ****things**** a****s**** t****he**** B****libbering**** H****umdinger**** o****r**** t****he**** C****rumple****-****Horned**** S****norkack!"  
**The Marauders were having a hard time containing their laughter as well. Even Lily couldn't help but giggle.

"**Well,**** t****hey**** w****ere**** r****ight,**** w****eren't**** t****hey?" said**** H****ermione**** i****mpatiently.**** "T****here**** a****ren't**** a****ny ****such ****things**** a****s**** t****he**** B****libbering**** H****umdinger**** o****r**** t****he**** C****rumple****-****Horned**** S****norkack." Luna**** g****ave**** h****er**** a ****withering**** l****ook ****and ****flounced**** a****way,**** r****adishes**** s****winging**** m****adly****. P****arvati ****and**** L****avender**** w****ere ****not**** t****he ****only**** o****nes**** h****ooting ****with ****laughter**** n****ow.**

"**D'you**** m****ind**** n****ot**** o****ffending**** t****he**** o****nly**** p****eople**** w****ho ****believe**** m****e?" Harry****asked**** H****ermione**** a****s**** t****hey**** m****ade**** t****heir**** w****ay****into**** c****lass. **

"**Oh,**** f****or**** h****eaven's**** s****ake,**** H****arry,**** y****ou**** c****an**** d****o**** b****etter**** t****han**** h****er," said**** H****ermione. "Ginny's**** t****old**** m****e**** a****ll**** a****bout**** h****er; ****apparently,**** s****he'll**** o****nly ****believe**** i****n ****things**** a****s**** l****ong**** a****s**** t****here's**** n****o**** p****roof**** a****t**** a****ll.**** W****ell,**** I w****ouldn't ****expect ****anything**** e****lse**** f****rom ****someone**** w****hose ****father ****runs **_**T**__**he**__** Q**__**uibbler**_**."**  
"Someone doesn't like Luna," Sirius said in a sing-song voice.

"Well, Hermione is a more logical person, while Luna takes things on faith," said James.

**Harry**** t****hought**** o****f**** t****he**** s****inister**** w****inged**** h****orses**** h****e**** h****ad**** s****een**** o****n**** t****he**** n****ight**** h****e**** h****ad ar****rived****and**** h****ow**** L****una**** h****ad**** s****aid**** s****he**** c****ould**** s****ee**** t****hem**** t****o.**** H****is**** s****pirits**** s****ank**** s****lightly.**** H****ad**** s****he**** b****een**** l****ying?**** B****ut**** b****efore**** h****e**** c****ould**** d****evote**** m****uch**** m****ore ****thought**** t****o**** t****he ****matter,**** E****rnie**** M****acmillan**** h****ad**** s****tepped**** u****p**** t****o**** h****im. "I**** w****ant**** y****ou**** t****o**** k****now,**** P****otter," he**** s****aid**** i****n**** a l****oud,**** c****arrying**** v****oice, "that**** i****t's**** n****ot ****only**** w****eirdoes**** w****ho**** s****upport**** y****ou.**** I p****ersonally ****believe**** y****ou**** o****ne h****undred**** p****er****c****ent.**** M****y ****family**** h****ave ****always**** s****tood ****firm ****behind**** D****umbledore, ****and**** s****o**** d****o**** I****."**  
"He sounds like he's making an official statement," Sirius laughed.

"He does, but it's still nice of him," James said.

"**Er, thanks**** v****ery ****much,**** E****rnie," said**** H****arry,**** t****aken**** a****back**** b****ut**** p****leased.**** E****rnie**** m****ight**** b****e**** p****ompous**** o****n**** o****ccasions ****like**** t****his,****but**** H****arry**** w****as**** i****n**** a ****mood**** t****o ****deeply ****appreciate**** a v****ote**** o****f ****confidence**** f****rom**** s****omebody**** w****ho**** d****id**** n****ot**** h****ave ****radishes**** d****angling ****from**** t****heir**** ea****rs.**** E****rnie's**** w****ords**** h****ad**** c****ertainly**** w****iped**** t****he**** s****mile**** f****rom**** L****avender**** B****rown's**** f****ace**** a****nd**** a****s**** h****e**** t****urned**** t****o ****talk**** t****o**** R****on****and**** H****ermione,**** H****arry**** c****aught**** S****eamus's ****expression,**** w****hich ****looked**** b****oth ****confused****and ****defiant.**  
"Thank Merlin!" Lily said. "Looks like Harry's year won't be as bad as it seemed at first."  
"Don't forget, he's still got those detentions with Umbridge left," Peter said  
glumly.

"Oh yeah," Lily said and her face fell.

**To**** n****obody's ****surprise,**** P****rofessor**** S****prout**** s****tarted**** t****heir ****lesson**** b****y ****lecturing**** t****hem**** a****bout**** t****he**** i****mportance**** o****f**** O****WLs.**** H****arry ****wished**** a****ll**** t****he ****teachers**** w****ould**** s****top**** d****oing**** t****his;**** h****e**** w****as**** s****tarting**** t****o**** g****et**** a****n**** a****nxious,**** t****wisted**** f****eeling**** i****n**** h****is ****stomach**** e****very**** t****ime**** h****e ****remembered**** h****ow ****much ****homework**** h****e**** h****ad**** t****o**** d****o,**** a f****eeling**** t****hat**** w****orsened**** d****ramatically**** w****hen**** P****rofessor**** S****prout**** g****ave**** t****hem**** y****et**** a****nother**** e****ssay**** a****t**** t****he**** e****nd**** o****f**** c****lass.**** T****ired**** a****nd**** s****melling**** s****trongly**** o****f**** d****ragon**** d****ung,**** P****rofessor**** S****prout's**** p****referred ****type**** o****f ****fertiliser,**** t****he**** G****ryffindors**** t****rooped ****back**** u****p**** t****o**** t****he**** c****astle**** a****n**** h****our ****and**** a h****alf**** l****ater,**** n****one**** o****f**** t****hem**** t****alking**** v****ery ****much;**** i****t**** h****ad ****been ****another ****long**** d****ay.**  
The Marauders and Lily felt exhausted, just reading about the first days of fifth year, they remembered all too well what it had felt like. A kid in their year had a breakdown and had to go to St. Mungo's, months before the OWLs started.

**As**** H****arry**** w****as**** s****tarving,****and**** h****e**** h****ad**** h****is**** f****irst**** d****etention****with**** U****mbridge**** a****t**** f****ive**** o'****clock,**** h****e**** h****eaded ****straight**** f****or**** d****inner ****without ****dropping**** o****ff**** h****is ****bag**** i****n**** G****ryffindor**** t****ower**** s****o**** t****hat**** h****e ****would ****bolt ****something**** d****own**** b****efore**** f****acing ****whatever**** s****he**** h****ad**** i****n**** s****tore**** f****or**** h****im.**  
Sirius pulled out his Umbridge list and added to it, even though Umbridge hadn't technically done anything – yet.

**He**** h****ad**** b****arely**** r****eached**** t****he**** e****ntrance**** o****f**** t****he**** G****reat**** H****all,****however,**** w****hen**** a l****oud ****and ****angry****voice**** y****elled, "Oi,**** P****otter!"**

"**What**** n****ow?" he**** m****uttered**** w****earily,**** t****urning**** t****o**** f****ace**** A****ngelina**** J****ohnson,**** w****ho**** l****ooked**** a****s**** t****hough**** s****he**** w****as**** i****n**** a t****owering**** t****emper.**

"**I'll**** t****ell**** y****ou**** w****hat**** n****ow," she**** s****aid,**** m****arching****straight**** u****p**** t****o**** h****im ****and ****poking ****him**** h****ard**** i****n**** t****he**** c****hest ****with**** h****er**** f****inger. "How**** c****ome**** y****ou've**** l****anded**** y****ourself**** i****n ****detention**** f****or**** f****ive**** o'****clock**** o****n**** F****riday?" **

"**What?" said**** H****arry. "Why**** – ****oh**** y****eah,**** K****eeper**** t****ryouts!"**

"Sucks to be Harry," Peter muttered. "Now he's going to miss the tryouts too."

"**Now**** h****e****remembers!" snarled**** A****ngelina. "Didn't**** I t****ell**** y****ou**** I w****anted**** t****o**** d****o**** a t****ryout ****with**** t****he**** w****hole**** t****eam,****and**** f****ind ****someone**** w****ho**** f****itted**** i****n**** w****ith ****everyone!**** D****idn't**** I t****ell**** y****ou**** I'****d**** b****ooked**** t****he**** Q****uidditch**** p****itch**** s****pecially?**** A****nd**** n****ow**** y****ou've**** d****ecided**** y****ou're ****n****ot ****going to**** b****e**** t****here!"**

"**I**** d****idn't**** d****ecide**** n****ot**** t****o**** b****e**** t****here!" said ****H****arry,**** s****tung**** b****y**** t****he ****injustice**** o****f**** t****hese**** w****ords. "I**** g****ot ****detention****from**** t****hat**** U****mbridge**** w****oman,**** j****ust**** b****ecause**** I t****old**** h****er**** t****he ****truth**** a****bout**** Y****ou****-****Know****-****Who." **

"**Well,**** y****ou**** c****an ****just**** g****o ****straight**** t****o**** h****er****and**** a****sk**** h****er**** t****o**** l****et**** y****ou**** o****ff**** o****n ****Friday," said**** A****ngelina**** f****iercely, "and I don't**** c****are**** h****ow**** y****ou**** d****o**** i****t.**** T****ell**** h****er**** Y****ou****-****Know****-****Who's**** a f****igment**** o****f**** y****our ****imagination**** i****f**** y****ou**** l****ike, ****just**** m****ake**** s****ure**** y****ou****'r****e**** t****here."**

"Merlin, she's almost as bad as Oliver," Remus said.

**She**** t****urned**** o****n**** h****er**** h****eel**** a****nd**** s****tormed**** a****way. "You**** k****now**** w****hat?" Harry**** s****aid**** t****o**** R****on**** a****nd**** H****ermione**** a****s**** t****hey**** e****ntered**** t****he**** G****reat**** H****all. "I**** t****hink**** w****e'd**** b****etter ****c****heck**** w****ith**** P****uddlemere**** U****nited**** w****hether**** O****liver ****W****ood's**** b****een**** k****illed**** d****uring**** a t****raining**** s****ession,**** b****ecause**** A****ngelina**** s****eems**** t****o**** b****e**** c****hannelling**** h****is**** s****pirit."**  
"Harry seems to think so too," James said.

"**What**** d'****you ****reckon**** a****re**** t****he**** o****dds**** o****f**** U****mbridge**** l****etting**** y****ou**** o****ff**** o****n ****Friday?" said**** R****on**** s****ceptically,**** a****s**** t****hey**** s****at**** d****own**** a****t**** t****he**** G****ryffindor**** t****able.**

"**Less**** t****han**** z****ero," said**** H****arry**** g****lumly,**** t****ipping**** l****amb**** c****hops**** o****n**** t****o**** h****is**** p****late**** a****nd**** s****tarting**** t****o**** e****at. "Better**** t****ry,****though,**** h****adn't**** I?**** I'****ll**** o****ffer**** t****o**** d****o**** t****wo**** m****ore ****detentions**** o****r ****something,**** I d****unno?" He**** s****wallowed**** a ****mouthful**** o****f ****potato****and**** a****dded, "I**** h****ope she**** d****oesn't ****keep**** m****e**** t****oo**** l****ong**** t****his ****evening.**** Y****ou ****realise**** w****e've**** g****ot**** t****o**** w****rite t****hree**** essays,**** p****ractise**** V****anishing**** s****pells**** f****or**** M****cGonagall,**** w****ork**** o****ut**** a c****ounter****-****charm**** f****or**** F****litwick,**** f****inish**** t****he**** b****owtruckle**** d****rawing**** a****nd**** s****tart**** t****hat**** s****tupid**** d****ream ****diary**** f****or**** T****relawney?"  
**"I get a headache just hearing about this much homework," Sirius groaned.

**Ron**** gr****oaned ****and**** f****or**** s****ome**** r****eason**** g****lanced**** u****p**** a****t**** t****he ****ceiling. "And**** i****t ****looks ****like**** i****t's ****going**** t****o**** r****ain." **

**"What's**** t****hat**** g****ot**** t****o**** d****o**** w****ith**** o****ur**** h****omework?" said**** H****ermione,**** h****er ****eyebrows**** r****aised.**

"**Nothing," said**** R****on**** a****t**** o****nce,**** h****is**** e****ars****reddening.  
**"Wonder what that was about," Lily said skeptically.

**At**** f****ive**** t****o ****five**** H****arry**** b****ade**** t****he**** o****ther**** t****wo**** g****oodbye**** a****nd**** s****et**** o****ff**** f****or**** U****mbridge's**** o****ffice**** o****n**** t****he****third ****floor.**** W****hen**** h****e ****knocked**** o****n**** t****he**** d****oor**** s****he**** c****alled, "Come**** i****n," in**** a s****ugary**** v****oice.**** H****e ****entered****c autiously,**** l****ooking**** a****round. He**** h****ad**** k****nown**** t****his**** o****ffice**** u****nder**** t****hree**** o****f**** i****ts ****previous ****occupants. In**** t****he**** d****ays**** w****hen**** G****ilderoy**** L****ockhart**** h****ad**** l****ived**** h****ere**** i****t**** h****ad**** b****een**** p****lastered**** i****n**** b****eaming ****portraits**** o****f ****himself.**  
"Narcissistic git," Sirius muttered.

**When**** L****upin**** h****ad**** o****ccupied**** i****t,**** i****t**** w****as ****likely**** y****ou ****would**** m****eet**** s****ome ****fascinating**** D****ark**** c****reature**** i****n**** a c****age**** o****r**** t****ank**** i****f**** y****ou**** c****ame**** t****o**** c****all.**** I****n**** t****he ****impostor**** M****oody's**** d****ays**** i****t**** h****ad**** b****een ****packed ****with ****various ****instruments ****and ****artefacts**** f****or**** t****he ****detection**** o****f**** w****rongdoing ****and ****concealment.**  
"There's one thing I just noticed," James said. "How come Moony's called by his last name?"  
"This is all Harry's point of view," Lily reasoned. "He's not very close to Remus- no offence Remus.?  
**Now,**** h****owever,**** i****t ****looked ****totally ****unrecognisable.**** T****he ****surfaces**** h****ad**** a****ll ****been**** d****raped**** i****n**** l****acy**** c****overs ****and ****cloths.**** T****here**** w****ere**** s****everal**** v****ases**** f****ull**** o****f**** d****ried**** f****lowers,**** e****ach**** o****ne ****residing**** o****n**** i****ts**** o****wn**** d****oily,****and**** o****n**** o****ne**** o****f**** t****he**** w****alls**** w****as**** a ****collection**** o****f ****ornamental**** p****lates,**** e****ach ****decorated ****with**** a l****arge****Technicolor**** k****itten****, w****earing**** a ****different**** b****ow**** a****round**** i****ts**** n****eck.  
**They all grimaced.

"Oh god, it sounds like a mix of Mrs. Figg's house and a ten-year old girl's bedroom," Remus said.

"I think being in that room is punishment enough by itself," Sirius said.

**These**** w****ere**** s****o**** f****oul**** t****hat**** H****arry**** s****tared**** a****t**** t****hem, ****transfixed,**** u****ntil**** P****rofessor**** U****mbridge**** s****poke**** a****gain. "Good****evening,**** M****. Potter." Harry**** s****tarted ****and ****looked**** a****round.**** H****e**** h****ad**** n****ot ****noticed**** h****er**** a****t ****first ****because**** s****he**** w****as**** w****earing**** a ****luridly**** f****lowered**** s****et**** o****f**** r****obes**** t****hat**** b****lended**** o****nly**** t****oo**** w****ell ****with t****he ****tablecloth**** o****n**** t****he ****desk ****behind**** h****er.  
**"That woman has no taste in clothes," Lily said.

"**Evening,**** P****rofessor**** U****mbridge," Harry**** s****aid**** s****tiffly. **

"**Well,**** s****it**** d****own," she**** s****aid,**** p****ointing**** t****owards**** a s****mall**** t****able**** d****raped**** i****n**** l****ace,**** b****eside**** w****hich**** s****he**** h****ad**** d****rawn**** u****p**** a ****straight****-****backed**** c****hair.**** A p****iece**** o****f**** b****lank**** p****archment**** l****ay**** o****n**** t****he**** t****able,**** a****pparently**** w****aiting**** f****or**** h****im. "Er," said**** H****arry,**** w****ithout**** m****oving. "Professor**** U****mbridge, er, before**** w****e**** s****tart,**** I w****anted**** t****o**** a****sk**** y****ou**** for ****a**** f****avour."**

**Her**** b****ulging**** e****yes**** n****arrowed. "Oh,**** y****es?"**

"I bet she's gloating," James said angrily. "She's going to use this to punish him even further.

**"Well,**** I'****m**** – ****I'm**** o****n**** t****he**** G****ryffindor**** Q****uidditch**** t****eam.**** A****nd**** I w****as**** s****upposed**** t****o**** b****e**** a****t**** t****he**** t****ryouts**** f****or**** t****he**** n****ew**** k****eeper**** a****t ****five**** o'****clock**** o****n**** F****riday**** a****nd**** I w****as – was**** w****ondering**** w****hether**** I c****ould**** s****kip ****detention**** t****hat**** n****ight**** a****nd**** d****o**** i****t – do**** i****t ****another**** n****ight**** i****nstead?" He**** k****new**** l****ong**** b****efore**** h****e**** r****eached**** t****he**** e****nd**** o****f**** h****is**** s****entence**** t****hat**** i****t**** w****as**** n****o**** g****ood. **

"**Oh,**** n****o," said**** U****mbridge,**** s****miling**** s****o**** w****idely**** t****hat**** s****he ****looked**** a****s****though**** s****he**** h****ad**** j****ust**** s****wallowed**** a p****articularly**** j****uicy**** f****ly. "Oh,**** n****o,**** n****o,**** n****o.**** T****his**** i****s**** y****our**** p****unishment**** f****or**** s****preading**** e****vil,**** n****asty,**** a****ttention****-****seeking**** s****tories, ****M****r****. P****otter,**** a****nd**** p****unishments**** c****ertainly**** c****annot**** b****e**** a****djusted**** t****o**** s****uit**** t****he**** g****uilty**** o****ne's**** c****onvenience.**** N****o,**** y****ou**** w****ill**** c****ome here**** a****t ****five**** o'****clock**** t****omorrow,**** a****nd**** t****he**** n****ext**** d****ay,**** a****nd**** o****n**** F****riday**** t****oo,**** a****nd**** y****ou**** w****ill**** d****o**** y****our ****detentions**** a****s**** p****lanned.**** I t****hink**** i****t**** r****ather**** a g****ood**** t****hing**** t****hat**** y****ou****'****re**** m****issing ****something**** y****ou**** r****eally**** w****ant**** t****o**** d****o.**** I****t**** o****ught**** t****o**** r****einforce**** t****he lesson**** I'****m**** t****rying**** t****o**** t****each**** y****ou."**  
"I knew it, James said.

"No one talks to my son that way and gets away with it!" Lily said fuming. "Sirius, add this to your list.'  
"Yes, ma'am," Sirius said, half-terrified of Lily in this state.

**Harry**** f****elt**** t****he**** b****lood**** s****urge**** t****o**** h****is**** h****ead**** a****nd**** h****eard**** a t****humping**** n****oise**** i****n**** h****is**** e****ars.**** S****o**** h****e**** t****old evil,**** n****asty,**** a****ttention****-****seeking**** s****tories,**** d****id**** h****e? She**** w****as**** w****atching**** h****im**** w****ith**** h****er**** h****ead**** s****lightly**** t****o**** o****ne**** s****ide,**** s****till**** s****miling**** w****idely,**** a****s**** t****hough**** s****he**** k****new**** e****xactly**** w****hat**** h****e**** w****as**** t****hinking**** a****nd**** w****as**** w****aiting**** t****o**** s****ee**** w****hether**** h****e**** w****ould**** s****tart**** s****houting**** a****gain.**** W****ith**** a m****assive**** e****ffort,**** H****arry**** l****ooked**** a****way**** f****rom**** h****er,**** d****ropped**** h****is**** s****choolbag**** b****eside**** t****he**** s****traight****-****backed**** c****hair**** a****nd sat**** d****own. **

"**There," said**** U****mbridge**** s****weetly, "we're**** g****etting**** b****etter**** a****t**** c****ontrolling**** o****ur**** t****emper**** a****lready,**** a****ren't**** w****e? Now,**** y****ou****'****re ****going**** t****o**** b****e**** d****oing**** s****ome**** l****ines**** f****or**** m****e,**** M****r****. P****otter."**

"Lines?' Lily said blankly. "That's it?'  
"She can't have served a single detention herself, or she would have come up with something much more creative," Sirius said.

"There must be something more behind it than just writing lines," Remus said. "The chapter wouldn't be named 'Detention with Dolores' if the detention was that boring. And besides, someone as nasty as Umbitch can't be satisfied with something that simple.  
Everyone stared at Remus, who blushed.

"Umbitch?" Sirius said. "Why didn't I think of that?"

**"No,**** n****ot**** w****ith**** y****our**** q****uill," she**** a****dded,**** a****s**** H****arry**** b****ent**** d****own**** t****o**** o****pen**** h****is**** b****ag. "You're**** g****oing**** t****o**** b****e**** u****sing**** a r****ather**** s****pecial**** o****ne**** o****f**** m****ine.**** H****ere**** y****ou**** a****re." She**** h****anded**** h****im**** a l****ong,**** t****hin**** b****lack**** q****uill**** w****ith**** a****n**** u****nusually**** s****harp**** p****oint. "I**** w****ant**** y****ou**** t****o**** w****rite,**** 'I m****ust**** n****ot**** t****ell**** l****ies,'" she**** t****old**** h****im**** s****oftly.**

"**How**** m****any**** t****imes?" Harry**** a****sked,**** w****ith**** a c****reditable**** i****mitation**** o****f**** p****oliteness.**

"**Oh,**** a****s**** l****ong**** a****s**** i****t**** t****akes**** f****or**** t****he**** m****essage**** t****o**** s****ink**** i****n," said**** U****mbridge**** s****weetly. "Off**** y****ou**** g****o."**

"It's an evil quill," Sirius decided. "Designed to brainwash students or something. I'm sure of it."

**She**** m****oved**** o****ver**** t****o**** h****er**** d****esk,**** s****at**** d****own**** a****nd**** w****ent**** o****ver**** a s****tack**** o****f**** p****archment**** t****hat**** l****ooked**** l****ike**** e****ssays**** f****or**** m****arking.**** H****arry**** r****aised**** t****he**** s****harp**** b****lack**** q****uill,**** t****hen**** r****ealised**** w****hat**** w****as**** m****issing. "You**** h****aven't**** g****iven**** m****e**** a****ny**** i****nk," he**** s****aid. **

"**Oh,**** y****ou**** w****on't**** n****eed**** i****nk," said**** P****rofessor**** U****mbridge,**** w****ith**** t****he**** m****erest**** s****uggestion**** o****f**** a l****augh**** i****n**** h****er**** v****oice. Harry**** p****laced**** t****he**** p****oint**** o****f**** t****he**** q****uill**** o****n**** t****he**** p****aper**** a****nd**** w****rote:**_**I m**__**ust**__** n**__**ot**__** t**__**ell**__** l**__**ies. **_**He**** l****et**** o****ut**** a g****asp**** o****f**** p****ain.**** T****he**** w****ords**** h****ad**** a****ppeared**** o****n**** t****he**** p****archment**** i****n**** w****hat**** a****ppeared**** t****o**** b****e**** s****hining**** r****ed**** i****nk.**** A****t**** t****he**** s****ame**** t****ime,**** t****he**** w****ords**** h****ad**** a****ppeared**** o****n**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** H****arry's**** r****ight**** h****and,**** c****ut**** i****nto**** h****is**** s****kin**** a****s**** t****hough**** t****raced**** t****here**** b****y**** s****calpel.**** Y****et**** e****ven**** a****s**** h****e**** s****tared**** a****t**** t****he**** s****hining**** c****ut,**** t****he**** s****kin**** h****ealed**** o****ver**** a****gain,**** l****eaving**** t****he**** p****lace**** w****here**** i****t**** h****ad**** b****een**** s****lightly**** r****edder**** t****han**** b****efore**** c****ut**** q****uite**** s****mooth.**

They all gasped. "That's got to be illegal!" Lily exclaimed.

**Harry**** l****ooked**** ar****ound**** a****t**** U****mbridge.**** S****he**** w****as****watching****him,**** h****er**** w****ide,**** t****oadlike****mouth****stretched**** i****n**** a s****mile. "Yes?"**

"**Nothing," said**** H****arry**** q****uietly. He****looked**** b****ack**** a****t**** t****he****parchment,**** p****laced**** t****he****quill**** o****n**** i****t**** o****nce**** m****ore,**** w****rote**** 'I m****ust**** n****ot**** t****ell**** l****ies,'****and ****felt**** t****he**** s****earing**** p****ain**** o****n**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** h****is**** h****and**** f****or**** a ****second ****time;**** o****nce**** a****gain,**** t****he****words**** h****ad ****been ****cut**** i****nto**** h****is**** s****kin;**** o****nce**** a****gain,**** t****hey ****healed**** o****ver ****seconds ****later. And**** o****n**** i****t**** w****ent.**** A****gain ****and**** a****gain**** H****arry**** w****rote**** t****he ****words**** o****n**** t****he ****parchment**** i****n**** w****hat**** h****e**** s****oon**** c****ame**** t****o**** r****ealise**** w****as**** n****ot**** i****nk, but**** h****is ****own**** b****lood.**  
Peter looked about ready to vomit, and Lily and James looked slightly green at that mistreatment of their son.

**And,**** a****gain**** a****nd again,**** t****he**** w****ords**** w****ere**** c****ut**** i****nto**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** h****is**** h****and,**** h****ealed,**** a****nd**** r****eappeared**** t****he**** n****ext**** t****ime**** h****e**** s****et**** q****uill**** t****o**** p****archment.  
**Sirius eyed his quill warily, before scribbling madly on the Umbridge list.

**Darkness**** f****ell**** o****utside**** U****mbridge's**** w****indow.**** H****arry**** d****id**** n****ot**** a****sk**** w****hen**** h****e**** w****ould**** b****e**** a****llowed**** t****o**** s****top.**** H****e**** d****id**** n****ot**** e****ven**** c****heck**** h****is**** w****atch.**** H****e**** k****new**** s****he**** w****as ****watching ****him**** f****or**** s****igns**** o****f**** w****eakness**** a****nd**** h****e**** w****as**** n****ot**** g****oing**** t****o**** s****how**** a****ny,**** n****ot****even**** i****f**** h****e**** h****ad**** t****o**** s****it**** t****here ****all**** n****ight,****cutting**** o****pen**** h****is****own**** h****and ****with ****his ****quill**

James took a small break, clearly disgusted. They all cursed Umridge mentally.

"**Come**** h****ere," she**** s****aid,****after**** w****hat ****seemed**** h****ours. He**** s****tood**** u****p.**** H****is**** h****and**** w****as**** s****tinging**** p****ainfully.**** W****hen**** h****e**** l****ooked**** d****own**** a****t**** i****t****, h****e**** s****aw**** t****hat**** t****he**** c****ut**** h****ad**** h****ealed,**** b****ut**** t****hat**** t****he**** s****kin**** t****here**** w****as**** r****ed**** r****aw.**

"He's going to have to see Madame Pomfrey after this!" Lily said.

"He won't," James said sadly. "He'll too stubborn to let this affect him."

"**Hand," she**** s****aid. He**** e****xtended**** i****t.**** S****he**** t****ook**** i****t**** i****n**** h****er**** o****wn.**** H****arry**** r****epressed**** a s****hudder**** a****s**** s****he**** t****ouched ****him**** w****ith**** h****er**** t****hick,**** s****tubby**** f****ingers**** o****n**** which**** s****he**** w****ore**** a n****umber**** o****f**** u****gly**** o****ld**** r****ings.**

"Don't touch my son!" Lily snapped.

"**Tut,**** t****ut,**** I d****on't**** s****eem**** t****o**** h****ave**** m****ade**** m****uch**** o****f**** a****n**** i****mpression**** y****et," she**** s****aid,**** s****miling. "Well,**** w****e'll**** j****ust**** h****ave**** t****o**** t****ry**** a****gain**** t****omorrow**** e****vening,**** w****on't**** w****e?**** Y****ou**** m****ay**** g****o."**

"He has to tell Dumbledore about this!" Peter said. "This must be illegal, and if Harry tells someone, maybe Umbridge will go to Azkaban."  
"I doubt that," Remus said. "She's got connections with the Ministry. She would just tell them Dumbledore and Harry made it all up."

**Harry**** l****eft**** h****er**** o****ffice**** w****ithout**** a w****ord.**** T****he**** s****chool**** w****as**** q****uite**** d****eserted;**** i****t**** w****as**** s****urely**** p****ast**** m****idnight.**** H****e**** w****alked**** s****lowly**** u****p**** t****he**** c****orridor,**** t****hen,**** w****hen**** h****e**** h****ad**** t****urned**** t****he**** c****orner**** a****nd**** w****as**** s****ure**** s****he**** w****ould**** n****ot**** h****ear ****h****im,**** b****roke**** i****nto**** a r****un.  
**"Has to run too," Sirius said. "That woman makes my mother sound lovely. Well, not really, but it's close."

**He**** h****ad**** n****ot**** h****ad**** t****ime**** t****o**** p****ractise**** V****anishing**** s****pells,**** h****ad**** n****ot**** w****ritten**** a s****ingle**** d****ream**** i****n**** h****is**** d****ream**** d****iary**** a****nd**** h****ad**** n****ot**** f****inished**** t****he**** d****rawing**** o****f**** t****he**** b****owtruckle,**** n****or**** h****ad**** h****e**** w****ritten**** h****is**** e****ssays.**** H****e**** s****kipped**** b****reakfast**** n****ext**** m****orning**** t****o**** s****cribble**** d****own**** c****ouple**** o****f**** m****ade****-****up**** d****reams**** f****or**** D****ivination,**** t****heir**** f****irst**** l****esson,**** a****nd**** w****as**** s****urprised**** t****o**** f****ind**** d****ishevelled**** R****on**** k****eeping**** h****im**** c****ompany. "How**** c****ome**** y****ou**** d****idn't**** d****o**** it ****last**** n****ight?" ****H****arry**** a****sked,**** a****s**** R****on**** s****tared**** w****ildly**** a****round**** t****he**** c****ommon**** r****oom**** f****or**** i****nspiration.**** R****on,**** w****ho**** h****ad**** b****een**** f****ast**** a****sleep**** w****hen**** H****arry**** g****ot**** b****ack**** t****o**** t****he**** d****ormitory,**** m****uttered**** s****omething**** a****bout doing**** o****ther**** s****tuff,**** b****ent**** l****ow**** o****ver**** h****is**** p****archment**** a****nd**** s****crawled**** a f****ew**** w****ords.  
**"What other stuff?" Peter wondered out loud.

"Probably something he's embarrassed about," James said. "Otherwise he would have told Harry about it."

"**That'll**** h****ave**** t****o**** d****o," he**** s****aid,**** s****lamming**** t****he**** d****iary**** s****hut. "I've**** s****aid**** I d****reamed I was**** b****uying**** a n****ew**** p****air**** o****f**** s****hoes,**** s****he**** c****an't**** m****ake**** a****nything**** w****eird**** o****ut**** o****f**** t****hat,**** c****an**** s****he?"**  
"She'll probably say it means his feet will fall off or something," Lily said.

**They**** h****urried**** o****ff**** t****o**** N****orth**** t****ower**** t****ogether. "How**** w****as**** d****etention**** w****ith**** U****mbridge,**** a****nyway?**** W****hat**** d****id**** s****he**** m****ake**** y****ou**** d****o?"**

**Harry**** h****esitated**** f****or**** a f****raction**** o****f**** a s****econd,**** t****hen**** s****aid, "Lines." **

"**That's**** n****ot**** t****oo**** b****ad,**** t****hen,**** e****h?" said**** R****on. **

"**Nope," said**** H****arry.**

"Why isn't he telling Ron!" Sirius said.

"He probably doesn't want Ron to worry," Remus said. "Would you tell us if this happened to you – no, wait, I forgot who I was talking to. You complain to us about a paper cut." Sirius huffed indignantly.

"**Hey, ****I f****orgot, ****d****id**** s****he**** l****et**** y****ou**** o****ff**** f****or**** F****riday?"**

"**No," said**** H****arry.** **Ron**** g****roaned**** s****ympathetically.**

**It ****w****as**** a****nother**** b****ad**** d****ay**** f****or**** H****arry;**** h****e**** w****as**** o****ne**** o****f**** t****he**** w****orst**** i****n**** T****ransfiguration,**** n****ot**** h****aving**** p****ractised**** V****anishing**** s****pells**** a****t**** a****ll.**** H****e**** h****ad**** t****o**** g****ive**** u****p**** h****is**** l****unch**** h****our**** t****o**** c****omplete**** t****he**** p****icture**** o****f**** t****he**** b****owtruckle**** a****nd,**** m****eanwhile,**** P****rofessors**** M****cGonagall,**** G****rubbly****-****Plank**** a****nd**** S****inistra**** g****ave**** t****hem**** y****et**** m****ore**** h****omework,**** w****hich**** h****e**** h****ad**** n****o**** p****rospect**** o****f**** f****inishing**** t****hat**** e****vening**** b****ecause**** o****f**** h****is**** s****econd**** d****etention**** w****ith**** U****mbridge.**

"I'm glad it's Christmas," Sirius said. "Just reading this puts me off studying for at the least a week."  
"It's not like you study normally," Remus said.

"Sure I do," Sirius said. "I always turn in my essays, don't I?"  
"After you copied mine," Remus muttered.

**To**** c****ap**** i****t**** a****ll,**** A****ngelina**** J****ohnson**** t****racked**** h****im**** d****own**** a****t**** d****inner**** a****gain**** a****nd,**** o****n**** l****earning**** t****hat**** b****e**** w****ould**** n****ot**** b****e**** a****ble**** t****o**** a****ttend**** F****riday's**** K****eeper**** t****ryouts,**** t****old**** h****im**** s****he**** w****as**** n****ot**** a****t**** a****ll**** i****mpressed**** b****y**** h****is**** a****ttitude**** a****nd**** t****hat**** s****he**** e****xpected**** p****layers**** w****ho**** w****ished**** t****o**** r****emain**** o****n**** t****he**** t****eam**** t****o**** p****ut**** t****raining**** b****efore**** t****heir**** o****ther**** c****ommitments. "I'm**** i****n**** d****etention!" ****H****arry**** y****elled**** a****fter**** h****er**** a****s**** s****he**** s****talked**** a****way. "D'you**** t****hink**** I'****d**** r****ather**** b****e**** s****tuck**** i****n**** a r****oom with**** t****hat**** o****ld**** t****oad**** o****r ****p****laying**** Q****uidditch?"**

"**At**** l****east**** i****t's**** o****nly**** l****ines," said**** H****ermione**** c****onsolingly,**** a****s**** H****arry**** s****ank**** b****ack**** o****n****t****o**** h****is**** b****ench**** a****nd**** l****ooked**** d****own**** a****t**** h****is**** s****teak**** a****nd**** k****idney**** p****ie,**** w****hich**** h****e**** n****o**** l****onger**** f****ancied**** v****ery**** m****uch. "It's**** n****ot**** a****s**** i****f**** i****t's**** a d****readful**** p****unishment,**** r****eally?"**

"So he still hasn't told them," Lily noted sadly.

**Harry**** o****pened**** h****is**** m****outh,**** c****losed**** i****t**** a****gain**** a****nd**** n****odded.**** H****e**** w****as**** n****ot ****really ****sure ****why**** h****e**** w****as**** n****ot ****telling**** R****on ****and**** H****ermione**** e****xactly**** w****hat**** w****as ****happening**** i****n**** U****mbridge's**** r****oom:**** h****e**** o****nly**** k****new**** t****hat**** h****e**** d****id**** n****ot**** w****ant**** t****o**** s****ee**** t****heir ****looks**** o****f ****horror;**** t****hat**** w****ould**** m****ake**** t****he**** w****hole**** t****hing ****seem**** w****orse ****and ****therefore**** m****ore ****difficult**** t****o**** f****ace.**  
"Makes-Harry-keep-secrets-from-his-friends," Sirius read out loud as he wrote it on the Umbridge list (though the title had now been changed to Umbitch list.)

"It's Harry himself who's doing that," Peter said.

"It's her fault he's doing it,' Sirius insisted.

**He**** a****lso**** f****elt**** d****imly**** t****hat**** t****his**** w****as**** b****etween**** h****imself**** a****nd**** U****mbridge,**** a p****rivate**** b****attle**** o****f ****w****ills, and**** h****e**** w****as**** n****ot**** g****oing**** t****o**** g****ive**** h****er**** t****he**** s****atisfaction**** o****f**** h****earing**** t****hat**** h****e**** h****ad**** c****omplained**** a****bout**** i****t. "I**** c****an't**** b****elieve**** h****ow**** m****uch**** h****omework**** w****e've**** g****ot,"**** s****aid**** R****on**** m****iserably.**

"**Well,**** w****hy**** d****idn't**** y****ou**** d****o**** a****ny**** l****ast**** n****ight?" Hermione**** a****sked**** h****im. "Where**** w****ere**** y****ou,**** a****nyway?" **

"**I**** w****as**** – f****ancied**** a w****alk," ****s****aid**** R****on**** s****hiftily. Harry**** h****ad**** t****he**** d****istinct**** i****mpression**** t****hat**** h****e**** w****as**** n****ot**** a****lone**** i****n**** c****oncealing**** t****hings**** a****t**** t****he**** m****oment.**  
"Right there with ya Harry," James said.

**The**** s****econd**** d****etention**** w****as**** j****ust as**** b****ad**** a****s**** t****he**** p****revious**** o****ne.**** T****he**** s****kin**** o****n**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** H****arry's**** h****and**** b****ecame**** i****rritated**** m****ore**** q****uickly**** n****ow**** a****nd**** w****as**** s****oon**** r****ed**** a****nd**** i****nflamed.**** H****arry**** t****hought**** i****t**** u****nlikely**** t****hat**** i****t**** w****ould**** k****eep**** h****ealing**** a****s**** e****ffectively**** f****or**** l****ong.**** S****oon**** t****he**** c****ut**** w****ould**** r****emain**** e****tched**** i****nto**** h****is**** h****and**** a****nd**** U****mbridge**** w****ould,**** p****erhaps,**** b****e**** s****atisfied.**** H****e**** l****et**** n****o**** g****asp**** o****f**** p****ain**** e****scape**** h****im,**** h****owever,**** a****nd**** f****rom**** t****he**** m****oment**** o****f**** e****ntering**** t****he**** r****oom**** t****o**** t****he**** m****oment**** o****f**** h****is**** d****ismissal,**** a****gain**** p****ast**** m****idnight,**** h****e**** s****aid**** n****othing**** b****ut 'good**** e****vening' and 'goodnight'  
**Lily was fiddling with her wand like she wanted to hex the book and her expression was not unlike the one Professor McGonagall wore when she caught Sirius and James trying to hex the sorting hat to turn the first years' hair blue.

**His homework ****situation,****however,**** w****as**** n****ow**** d****esperate,**** a****nd**** w****hen**** h****e**** r****eturned**** t****o**** t****he**** G****ryffindor**** c****ommon**** r****oom**** h****e**** d****id**** n****ot,**** t****hough**** e****xhausted,**** g****o**** t****o**** b****ed,**** b****ut**** o****pened**** h****is**** b****ooks**** a****nd**** b****egan**** S****nape's**** m****oonstone**** e****ssay.**** I****t**** w****as**** h****alf-****p****ast**** t****wo**** b****y**** t****he**** t****ime**** h****e**** h****ad**** f****inished**** i****t. ****He**** k****new**** h****e**** h****ad**** d****one**** a p****oor**** j****ob,**** b****ut**** t****here**** w****as**** n****o**** h****elp**** f****or**** i****t;**** u****nless**** h****e**** h****ad**** s****omething**** t****o**** g****ive**** i****n**** h****e**** w****ould**** b****e**** i****n**** d****etention**** w****ith Snape**** n****ext.**** H****e**** t****hen**** d****ashed**** o****ff**** a****nswers**** t****o**** t****he**** q****uestions**** P****rofessor**** M****cGonagall**** h****ad**** s****et**** t****hem,**** c****obbled**** t****ogether**** s****omething**** o****n**** t****he**** p****roper**** h****andling**** o****f**** B****owtruckles**** f****or**** P****rofessor**** G****rubbly****-****Plank,**** a****nd**** s****taggered**** u****p**** t****o**** b****ed,**** w****here**** h****e**** f****ell**** f****ully**** c****lothed**** o****n**** t****op**** o****f**** t****he**** c****overs**** a****nd**** f****ell**** a****sleep**** i****mmediately.**

"He's not getting proper sleep," Lily said worriedly.

**Thursday**** p****assed**** i****n**** a d****aze**** o****f**** t****iredness.**** R****on**** s****eemed**** v****ery**** s****leepy**** t****oo,**** t****hough**** H****arry**** c****ould**** n****ot**** s****ee**** w****hy**** h****e**** s****hould**** b****e.**** H****arry's**** t****hird**** d****etention**** p****assed**** i****n**** t****he**** s****ame**** w****ay**** a****s**** t****he**** p****revious**** t****wo,**** e****xcept**** t****hat**** a****fter**** t****wo**** h****ours**** t****he**** w****ords 'I**** m****ust**** n****ot**** t****ell**** l****ies'**** d****id**** n****ot**** f****ade**** f****rom**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** H****arry's**** h****and,**** b****ut**** r****emained**** s****cratched**** t****here,**** o****ozing**** d****roplets**** o****f**** b****lood.**** T****he**** p****ause**** i****n**** t****he**** p****ointed**** q****uill's**** s****cratching**** m****ade**** P****rofessor**** U****mbridge**** l****ook**** u****p.**

"Oh no, now he's going to have another scar," Sirius groaned. "Like he isn't unlucky enough, looking like Prongs, but he has to be covered in scars, like Moony."  
Remus and James both whacked him on the back of his head. "Ouch!"

**"Ah,****" s****he**** s****aid**** s****oftly,**** m****oving**** a****round**** h****er**** d****esk**** t****o**** e****xamine**** h****is**** h****and**** h****erself. "Good.**** T****hat**** o****ught**** t****o**** s****erve**** a****s**** a r****eminder**** t****o**** y****ou,**** o****ughtn't**** i****t?**** Y****ou**** m****ay**** l****eave**** f****or**** t****onight."**

"**Do**** I s****till**** h****ave**** t****o**** c****ome back**** t****omorrow?" said**** H****arry**** p****icking**** u****p**** h****is**** s****choolbag**** w****ith**** h****is**** l****eft**** h****and**** r****ather**** t****han**** h****is**** s****marting**** r****ight**** o****ne. **

"**Oh**** y****es," said**** P****rofessor**** U****mbridge,**** s****miling**** a****s**** w****idely**** a****s**** b****efore. "Yes,**** I t****hink**** w****e**** c****an**** e****tch**** t****he**** m****essage**** a l****ittle**** d****eeper**** w****ith**** a****nother**** e****vening's**** w****ork."**

"She's scarring my son, isn't that enough for her!" Lily said furiously. "Oh, if I get my hands on her Crucio's too good for her." She continued muttering angrily.

**Harry**** h****ad**** n****ever**** b****efore**** c****onsidered**** t****he**** p****ossibility**** t****hat**** t****here**** m****ight**** b****e**** a****nother**** t****eacher**** i****n**** t****he**** w****orld**** h****e**** h****ated**** m****ore**** t****han**** S****nape,**** b****ut**** a****s**** h****e**** w****alked**** b****ack**** t****owards ****G****ryffindor**** t****ower**** h****e**** h****ad**** t****o**** a****dmit**** h****e**** h****ad**** f****ound**** a s****trong**** c****ontender.**** S****he's**** e****vil,**** h****e**** t****hought,**** a****s**** h****e**** c****limbed**** a s****taircase**** t****o**** t****he**** s****eventh**** f****loor,**** s****he's**** a****n**** e****vil,**** t****wisted,**** b****ad**** o****ld - ****Ron?" He**** h****ad**** r****eached**** t****he**** t****op**** o****f**** t****he**** s****tairs,**** t****urned**** r****ight**** a****nd**** a****lmost**** w****alked**** i****nto**** R****on,**** w****ho**** w****as**** l****urking**** b****ehind**** a s****tatue**** o****f**** C****achlan**** t****he**** Cr****anky,**** c****lutching**** h****is**** b****roomstick.**** H****e**** g****ave**** a g****reat**** l****eap**** o****f**** s****urprise**** w****hen**** h****e**** s****aw**** H****arry**** a****nd**** a****ttempted**** t****o**** h****ide**** h****is**** n****ew**** C****leansweep**** E****leven**** b****ehind**** h****is**** b****ack.**

"That's what he's been skipping his homework for? Flying?' Lily said shocked.

"Maybe he's trying for the team," James said happily.

"That's no reason to skip homework!"

"**What**** a****re**** y****ou**** d****oing?"**

"**Er. nothing." **

"**W****hat**** a****re**** y****ou**** d****oing?" Harry**** f****rowned**** a****t**** h****im. "Come**** o****n,**** y****ou**** c****an**** t****ell**** m****e!**** W****hat**** a****re**** y****ou**** h****iding**** h****ere**** f****or?" **

"**I'm – I'm ****h****iding**** f****rom**** F****red**** a****nd**** G****eorge,**** i****f**** y****ou**** m****ust**** k****now," said**** R****on.**** "T****hey**** j****ust**** w****ent**** p****ast**** w****ith**** a b****unch**** o****f**** f****irst****-****years,**** I b****et**** t****hey're**** t****esting**** s****tuff**** o****n**** t****hem**** a****gain.**** I m****ean,**** t****hey**** c****an't**** d****o**** i****t**** i****n**** t****he**** c****ommon**** r****oom**** n****ow,**** c****an**** t****hey,**** n****ot**** w****ith**** H****ermione**** t****here."  
**They all laughed.

**He**** w****as**** t****alking**** i****n**** a v****ery**** f****ast,**** f****everish**** w****ay. "But**** w****hat**** h****ave**** y****ou**** g****ot**** y****our**** b****room**** f****or,**** y****ou**** h****aven't**** b****een**** f****lying,**** h****ave**** y****ou?" Harry**** a****sked.**

"**I – well – well,**** O****K,**** I'****ll**** t****ell**** y****ou,**** b****ut**** d****on't**** l****augh,**** a****ll**** r****ight?" Ron**** s****aid**** d****efensively,**** t****urning**** r****edder**** w****ith**** e****very**** s****econd. I thought**** I'****d**** t****ry**** o****ut**** f****or**** G****ryffindor**** k****eeper**** n****ow**** I'****ve**** g****ot**** a d****ecent**** b****room.**** T****here.**** G****o**** o****n.**** L****augh."**

"I knew it!" James said.

"**I'm**** n****ot**** l****aughing," said**** H****arry.**** R****on**** b****linked. "It's**** a b****rilliant**** i****dea!**** I****t'd**** b****e**** r****eally**** c****ool**** i****f**** y****ou**** g****ot**** o****n**** t****he**** t****eam! ****I'****ve**** n****ever**** s****een**** y****ou**** p****lay**** K****eeper,**** a****re**** y****ou**** g****ood?"**

"**I'm**** n****ot**** b****ad," said**** R****on,**** w****ho**** l****ooked**** i****mmensely**** r****elieved**** a****t**** H****arry's**** r****eaction. "Charlie,**** F****red,**** a****nd**** G****eorge**** a****lways**** m****ade**** m****e**** K****eep**** f****or**** t****hem**** w****hen**** t****hey**** w****ere**** t****raining**** d****uring**** t****he**** h****olidays."**

"**So**** y****ou've**** b****een**** p****ractising**** t****onight?" **

"**Every**** e****vening**** s****ince**** T****uesday ****just**** o****n**** m****y**** o****wn,**** t****hough.**** I've b****een**** t****rying**** t****o**** b****ewitch**** Q****uaffles**** t****o**** f****ly**** a****t**** m****e,**** b****ut**** i****t**** h****asn't**** b****een**** e****asy**** a****nd**** I d****on't**** k****now**** h****ow**** m****uch**** u****se**** i****t'll**** b****e." Ron**** l****ooked**** n****ervous**** a****nd**** a****nxious. "Fred**** a****nd**** G****eorge**** a****re**** g****oing**** t****o**** l****augh**** t****hemselves**** s****tupid**** w****hen**** I t****urn**** u****p**** f****or**** t****he**** t****ryouts.**** T****hey**** h****aven't**** s****topped**** t****aking**** t****he**** m****ickey**** o****ut**** o****f**** m****e**** s****ince**** I g****ot**** m****ade**** a p****refect."  
**"That's mean," Lily said. "There's nothing wrong with being a prefect."

**"I**** w****ish**** I w****as**** g****oing**** t****o**** b****e**** t****here," said**** H****arry**** b****itterly,**** a****s**** t****hey**** s****et**** o****ff**** t****ogether**** t****owards**** t****he**** c****ommon**** r****oom. **

"**Yeah,**** s****o****o – Harry,**** w****hat's**** t****hat**** o****n**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** y****our**** h****and?" Harry,**** w****ho**** h****ad**** j****ust**** s****cratched**** h****is**** n****ose**** w****ith**** h****is**** f****ree**** r****ight**** h****and,**** t****ried**** t****o**** h****ide**** i****t,**** b****ut**** h****ad**** a****s**** m****uch**** s****uccess**** a****s**** R****on**** w****ith**** h****is**** C****leansweep."**

"**It's**** j****ust**** a c****ut, it's**** n****othing, it's –" But**** R****on**** h****ad**** g****rabbed**** H****arry's**** f****orearm**** a****nd**** p****ulled**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** H****arry's**** h****and**** u****p**** l****evel**** w****ith**** h****is**** e****yes.**** T****here**** w****as**** a p****ause,**** d****uring**** w****hich**** h****e**** s****tared**** a****t**** t****he**** w****ords**** c****arved**** i****nto**** t****he**** s****kin;**** t****hen,**** l****ooking**** s****ick,**** h****e**** r****eleased**** H****arry. "I**** t****hought**** y****ou**** s****aid**** s****he**** w****as**** j****ust**** g****iving**** y****ou**** l****ines?"**

"It's about time someone figures it out," Remus said. "How did he hide his hand for so many days anyway?"

**Harry**** h****esitated,**** b****ut**** a****fter**** a****ll,**** R****on**** h****ad**** b****een**** h****onest**** w****ith**** h****im,**** s****o**** h****e**** t****old**** R****on**** t****he**** t****ruth**** a****bout**** t****he**** h****ours**** h****e**** h****ad**** b****een**** s****pending**** i****n**** U****mbridge's**** o****ffice. "The**** o****ld**** h****ag!" Ron**** s****aid**** i****n**** a r****evolted**** w****hisper**** a****s**** t****hey**** c****ame**** t****o**** a h****alt**** i****n**** f****ront**** o****f**** t****he**** F****at**** L****ady,**** w****ho**** w****as**** d****ozing**** p****eacefully**** w****ith**** h****er**** h****ead**** a****gainst**** h****er**** f****rame. "She's**** s****ick!**** G****o**** t****o**** M****cGonagall,**** s****ay**** s****omething!"**

"**No," said**** H****arry**** a****t**** o****nce. "I'm**** n****ot**** g****iving**** h****er**** t****he**** s****atisfaction**** o****f**** k****nowing**** s****he's**** g****ot**** t****o**** m****e."**

"Harry!" Lily exclaimed

"He really is too stubborn for his own good," Sirius said.

"**Got**** t****o**** y****ou?**** Y****ou**** c****an't**** l****et**** h****er**** g****et**** a****way**** w****ith**** t****his!" **

"**I**** d****on't**** k****now**** h****ow**** m****uch**** p****ower**** M****cGonagall's**** g****ot**** o****ver**** h****er," said**** H****arry.**

"**Dumbledore,**** t****hen,**** t****ell**** D****umbledore!"**

"**No," said**** H****arry**** f****latly.**

"**Why**** n****ot?"**

"**He's**** g****ot**** e****nough**** o****n**** h****is**** m****ind," said**** H****arry,**** b****ut**** t****hat**** w****as**** n****ot**** t****he**** t****rue**** r****eason.**** H****e**** w****as**** n****ot**** g****oing**** t****o**** g****o**** t****o**** D****umbledore**** f****or**** h****elp**** w****hen**** D****umbledore**** h****ad**** n****ot**** s****poken**** t****o**** h****im**** o****nce**** s****ince**** J****une.**

"Then talk to him about it," Lily said.

"Would you talk to someone who seems to be purposely avoiding you?" Remus asked.

"Of cou – no, not really – but he should," Lily said.

"**Well,**** I r****eckon**** y****ou**** s****hould," Ron**** b****egan,**** b****ut**** h****e**** w****as**** i****nterrupted**** b****y**** t****he**** F****at**** L****ady,**** w****ho**** h****ad**** b****een**** w****atching**** t****hem**** s****leepily**** a****nd**** n****ow**** b****urst**** o****ut, "Are**** y****ou**** g****oing**** t****o**** g****ive**** m****e**** t****he**** p****assword**** o****r**** w****ill**** I h****ave**** t****o**** s****tay**** a****wake**** a****ll**** n****ight**** w****aiting**** f****or**** y****ou**** t****o**** f****inish**** y****our**** c****onversation?"  
Friday**** d****awned**** s****ullen**** a****nd**** s****odden**** a****s**** t****he**** r****est**** o****f**** t****he**** w****eek.**** T****hough**** H****arry**** a****utomatically**** g****lanced**** t****owards**** t****he**** s****taff**** t****able**** w****hen**** h****e**** e****ntered**** t****he**** G****reat**** H****all,**** i****t**** w****as**** w****ithout**** a****ny**** r****eal**** h****ope**** o****f**** s****eeing**** H****agrid,**** a****nd**** h****e**** t****urned**** h****is**** m****ind**** i****mmediately**** t****o**** h****is**** m****ore**** p****ressing**** p****roblems,**** s****uch**** a****s**** t****he**** m****ountainous**** p****ile**** o****f**** h****omework**** h****e**** h****ad**** t****o**** d****o**** a****nd the**** p****rospect**** o****f**** y****et**** a****nother**** d****etention**** w****ith**** U****mbridge.**

"That sounds like a fun day," Sirius said sarcastically.

**Two**** t****hings**** s****ustained**** H****arry**** t****hat**** d****ay.**** O****ne**** w****as**** t****he**** t****hought**** t****hat**** i****t**** w****as**** a****lmost**** t****he**** w****eekend;**** t****he**** o****ther**** w****as**** t****hat,**** d****readful**** t****hough**** h****is**** f****inal**** d****etention**** w****ith**** U****mbridge**** w****as**** s****ure**** t****o**** b****e,**** h****e**** h****ad**** a d****istant**** v****iew**** o****f**** t****he**** Q****uidditch**** p****itch**** f****rom**** h****er**** w****indow**** a****nd**** m****ight,**** w****ith**** l****uck,**** b****e**** a****ble**** t****o**** s****ee**** s****omething**** o****f**** R****on's**** t****ryout.**** T****hese**** w****ere**** r****ather**** f****eeble**** r****ays**** o****f**** l****ight,**** i****t**** w****as**** t****rue,**** b****ut**** H****arry**** w****as**** g****rateful**** f****or**** a****nything**** t****hat**** m****ight**** l****ighten**** h****is**** p****resent**** d****arkness;**** h****e**** h****ad**** n****ever**** h****ad**** a w****orse**** f****irst**** w****eek**** o****f**** t****erm**** a****t**** H****ogwarts.  
**"I can't blame him, what a depressing week," James said. "He's already behind in classes, his hand is permanently scarred because of that horrible Umbitch, Hagrid's still not back, nobody believes him about Voldemort, he's going to miss the tryouts, and he thinks he's going crazy because he can see thestrals. I've been to less depressing funerals than that week has been."  
"If that's just the first week, imagine what the rest of the year will be like," Sirius said and shuddered.

**At**** f****ive**** o'****clock**** t****hat**** e****vening**** h****e**** k****nocked**** o****n**** P****rofessor**** U****mbridge's**** o****ffice**** d****oor**** f****or**** w****hat**** h****e**** s****incerely**** h****oped**** w****ould**** b****e**** t****he**** f****inal**** t****ime,**** a****nd**** w****as**** t****old**** t****o**** e****nter.**** T****he**** b****lank**** p****archment**** l****ay**** r****eady**** f****or**** h****im**** o****n**** t****he**** l****ace****-covered t****able,**** t****he**** p****ointed**** b****lack**** q****uill**** b****eside**** i****t. "You**** k****now**** w****hat**** t****o**** d****o,**** M****r****. P****otter," said**** U****mbridge,**** s****miling**** s****weetly**** a****t**** h****im.**

"If she doesn't stop those sweet smiles, I'll take her lace and stick it where the sun doesn't shine," Lily said annoyed.

**Harry**** p****icked**** u****p**** t****he**** q****uill**** a****nd**** g****lanced**** t****hrough**** t****he**** w****indow.**** I****f**** h****e**** j****ust**** s****hifted**** h****is**** c****hair**** a****n**** i****nch**** o****r**** s****o**** t****o**** t****he**** r****ight****on**** t****he**** p****retext**** o****f**** s****hifting**** h****imself**** c****loser**** t****o**** t****he**** t****able,**** h****e**** m****anaged**** i****t. ****H****e**** n****ow**** h****ad**** a d****istant**** v****iew**** o****f**** t****he**** G****ryffindor ****Q****uidditch**** t****eam**** s****oaring**** u****p**** a****nd**** d****own**** t****he**** p****itch,**** w****hile**** h****alf**** a d****ozen**** s****lack**** f****igures**** s****tood**** a****t**** t****he**** f****oot**** o****f**** t****he**** t****hree**** h****igh**** g****oalposts,**** a****pparently**** w****aiting**** t****heir**** t****urn**** t****o**** K****eep.**** I****t**** w****as**** i****mpossible**** t****o**** t****ell**** w****hich**** o****ne**** w****as**** R****on**** a****t ****t****his**** d****istance. **

**I**** m****ust**** n****ot**** t****ell**** l****ies,**** H****arry**** w****rote.**** T****he**** c****ut**** o****n**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** h****is**** r****ight**** h****and**** o****pened**** a****nd**** b****egan**** t****o**** b****leed**** a****fresh. **_**I**__** m**__**ust**__** n**__**ot**__** t**__**ell**__** l**__**ies**_** T****he**** c****ut**** d****ug**** d****eeper,**** s****tinging**** a****nd**** s****marting. **_**I**__** m**__**ust**__** n**__**ot**__** t**__**ell**__** l**__**ies.**_** B****lood**** t****rickled**** d****own**** h****is**** w****rist.**

"Are you okay?" James asked Lily. She was cuddling by his side and he could feel her shaking.

"I'm fine," Lily said and rubbed her eyes angrily to get rid of the tears.

**He**** c****hanced**** a****nother**** g****lance**** o****ut**** o****f**** t****he**** w****indow.**** W****hoever**** w****as**** d****efending**** t****he**** g****oalposts**** n****ow**** w****as**** d****oing**** a v****ery**** p****oor**** j****ob**** i****ndeed.**** K****atie**** B****ell**** s****cored**** t****wice**** i****n**** t****he**** f****ew**** s****econds**** H****arry**** d****ared**** t****o**** w****atch.**** H****oping**** v****ery**** m****uch**** t****hat**** t****he**** K****eeper**** w****asn't**** R****on,**** h****e**** d****ropped**** h****is**** e****yes**** b****ack**** t****o**** t****he**** p****archment**** s****hining**** w****ith**** b****lood. **_**I**__** m**__**ust**__** n**__**ot**__** t**__**ell**__** l**__**ies**__**I**__** m**__**ust**__** n**__**ot**__** t**__**ell**__** l**__**ies**_

"This is sick," Sirius said horrified.

"And twisted, "Remus agreed.

**He**** l****ooked**** u****p**** w****henever**** h****e****thought**** h****e**** c****ould**** r****isk**** i****t;**** w****hen**** h****e**** c****ould**** h****ear**** t****he**** s****cratching**** o****f**** U****mbridge's**** q****uill**** o****r**** t****he**** o****pening**** o****f**** a d****esk**** d****rawer.**** T****he**** t****hird**** p****erson**** t****o**** t****ry**** o****ut**** w****as**** p****retty**** g****ood,**** t****he**** f****ourth**** w****as**** t****errible,**** t****he**** f****ifth**** d****odged**** a B****ludger**** e****xceptionally**** w****ell**** b****ut**** t****hen**** f****umbled**** a****n**** e****asy**** s****ave.**** T****he**** s****ky**** w****as**** d****arkening,**** a****nd**** H****arry**** d****oubted**** h****e**** w****ould**** b****e**** a****ble**** t****o**** s****ee**** t****he**** s****ixth**** a****nd**** s****eventh**** p****eople**** a****t**** a****ll. **_**I**__** m**__**ust**__** n**__**ot**__** t**__**ell**__** l**__**ies. I**__** m**__**ust **__**n**__**ot**__** t**__**ell**__** l**__**ies**_

Lily bit back a sob. James's voice was shaking.

**The**** p****archment**** w****as**** n****ow**** d****otted**** w****ith**** d****rops**** o****f**** b****lood**** f****rom**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** h****is**** h****and,**** w****hich**** w****as**** s****earing**** w****ith**** p****ain.**** W****hen**** h****e**** n****ext**** l****ooked**** u****p,**** n****ight**** h****ad**** f****allen**** a****nd**** t****he**** Q****uidditch**** p****itch**** w****as**** n****o**** l****onger**** v****isible. "Let's**** s****ee**** i****f**** y****ou've**** g****ot**** t****he**** m****essage**** y****et,**** s****hall**** w****e?" said**** U****mbridge's**** s****oft**** v****oice**** h****alf**** a****n**** h****our**** l****ater. She**** m****oved**** t****owards**** h****im,**** s****tretching**** o****ut**** h****er**** s****hort**** r****inged**** f****ingers**** f****or**** h****is**** a****rm.**** A****nd**** w****hen,**** a****s**** s****he**** t****ook**** h****old**** o****f**** h****im**** t****o**** e****xamine**** t****he**** w****ords**** n****ow**** c****ut**** i****nto**** h****is**** s****kin,**** p****ain**** s****eared,**** n****ot**** a****cross**** t****he**** b****ack**** o****f**** h****is**** h****and,**** b****ut**** a****cross**** t****he**** s****car**** o****n**** h****is**** f****orehead.**** A****t**** t****he**** s****ame**** t****ime,**** h****e**** h****ad**** a m****ost**** p****eculiar**** s****ensation**** s****omewhere**** a****round**** h****is**** m****idriff.**

"What?" Peter exclaimed. "Why did his scar hurt?"  
"Do you think she's connected with Voldemort?" Remus asked the others.

"I wouldn't be surprised," Sirius said darkly.

"Just let me read, then you'll know," James said annoyed.

**He**** w****renched**** h****is**** a****rm**** o****ut**** o****f**** h****er**** g****rip**** a****nd**** l****eapt**** t****o**** h****is**** f****eet,**** s****taring**** a****t**** h****er.**** S****he**** l****ooked**** b****ack**** a****t**** h****im,**** a s****mile**** s****tretching**** h****er**** w****ide,**** s****lack**** m****outh. "Yes,**** i****t**** h****urts,**** d****oesn't**** i****t?" she**** s****aid**** s****oftly. He**** d****id**** n****ot**** a****nswer.**** H****is**** h****eart**** w****as**** t****humping**** v****ery**** h****ard**** a****nd**** f****ast.**** W****as**** s****he**** t****alking**** a****bout**** h****is**** h****and**** o****r**** d****id**** s****he**** k****now**** w****hat**** h****e**** h****ad**** j****ust**** f****elt**** o****n**** h****is**** f****orehead? **

"I don't think she is," Lily said. "Connected with Voldemort I mean. I've met people like her. They always like to stay where the power is, which means she will stick with the Ministry, no matter what side they're on."

**"Well,**** I t****hink ****I'****ve**** m****ade**** m****y**** p****oint,**** M****r****. P****otter.**** Y****ou**** m****ay**** g****o." He**** c****aught**** u****p**** h****is**** s****choolbag**** a****nd**** l****eft**** t****he**** r****oom**** a****s**** q****uickly**** a****s**** h****e**** c****ould. Stay**** c****alm,**** h****e**** t****old**** h****imself,**** a****s**** h****e**** s****printed**** u****p**** t****he**** s****tairs.**** S****tay**** c****alm,**** i****t**** d****oesn't**** n****ecessarily**** m****ean**** w****hat**** y****ou**** t****hink**** i****t**** m****eans****  
"Mimbulus**** m****imbletonia!" he**** g****asped**** a****t**** t****he**** F****at**** L****ady,**** w****ho**** s****wung**** f****orwards**** o****nce**** m****ore. A**** r****oar**** o****f**** s****ound**** g****reeted**** h****im.**** R****on**** c****ame**** r****unning**** t****owards**** h****im,**** b****eaming**** a****ll**** o****ver**** h****is**** f****ace**** a****nd**** s****lopping**** b****utterbeer**** d****own**** h****is**** f****ront**** f****rom**** t****he**** g****oblet**** h****e**** w****as**** c****lutching. "Harry,**** I d****id**** i****t,**** I'****m**** i****n, ****I'****m**** K****eeper!"**

They all cheered.

"**What?**** O****h, brilliant!" said**** H****arry,**** t****rying**** t****o**** s****mile**** n****aturally,**** w****hile**** h****is**** h****eart**** c****ontinued**** t****o**** r****ace**** a****nd**** h****is**** h****and**** t****hrobbed**** a****nd**** b****led. **

"**Have**** a b****utterbeer." Ron**** p****ressed**** a b****ottle**** o****n**** h****im.**** "I c****an't**** b****elieve**** i****t. Where's**** H****ermione**** g****one?" **

**"She's**** t****here," said**** F****red,**** w****ho**** w****as**** a****lso**** s****wigging**** B****utterbeer,**** a****nd**** p****ointed**** t****o**** a****n**** a****rmchair**** b****y**** t****he**** f****ire.**** H****ermione**** w****as**** d****ozing**** i****n**** i****t,**** h****er**** d****rink**** d****ipping**** p****recariously**** i****n**** h****er**** h****and.**

"**Well,**** s****he**** s****aid**** s****he**** w****as**** p****leased**** w****hen**** I t****old**** h****er," said**** R****on,**** l****ooking**** s****lightly**** p****ut**** o****ut.**

"**Let**** h****er**** s****leep," said**** G****eorge**** h****astily.**** I****t**** w****as**** a f****ew**** m****oments**** b****efore**** H****arry**** n****oticed**** t****hat**** s****everal**** o****f**** t****he**** f****irst****-****years**** g****athered**** a****round**** t****hem**** b****ore**** u****nmistakable**** s****igns**** o****f**** r****ecent**** n****osebleeds.**

The Marauders snickered, and Lily rolled her eyes.

"**Come**** h****ere,**** R****on,**** a****nd**** s****ee**** i****f**** O****liver's**** o****ld**** r****obes**** f****it**** y****ou," called**** K****atie ****B****ell, "we**** c****an**** t****ake**** o****ff**** h****is**** n****ame**** a****nd**** p****ut**** y****ours**** o****n**** i****nstead."**

**As ****R****on**** m****oved**** a****way,**** A****ngelina**** c****ame**** s****triding**** u****p**** t****o**** H****arry. "Sorry**** I w****as**** a b****it**** s****hort**** w****ith**** y****ou**** e****arlier,**** P****otter," she**** s****aid ****a****bruptly. "It's**** s****tressful****, t****his**** m****anaging**** l****ark,**** y****ou**** k****now,**** I'****m**** s****tarting**** t****o**** t****hink**** I w****as**** a b****it**** h****ard**** o****n**** W****ood**** s****ometimes."**

"She better be sorry," Lily said. "After snapping like that at Harry. It's not like Quidditch is the most important thing in the world."  
"Where have you been?" James asked.

**She a**** t****he**** r****im**** o****f**** h****er**** g****oblet**** w****ith**** a s****light**** f****rown**** o****n**** h****er**** f****ace. "Look,**** I k****now**** h****e's**** y****our**** b****est**** m****ate,**** b****ut**** h****e's**** n****ot**** f****abulous," she**** s****aid**** b****luntly. "I**** t****hink**** w****ith**** a b****it**** o****f**** t****raining**** h****e'll**** b****e**** a****ll**** r****ight,**** t****hough.**** H****e**** c****omes**** f****rom**** a f****amily**** o****f**** g****ood**** Q****uidditch**** p****layers.**** I'****m**** b****anking**** o****n**** h****im**** t****urning**** o****ut**** t****o**** h****ave**** a b****it**** m****ore**** t****alent**** t****han**** h****e**** s****howed**** t****oday,**** t****o**** b****e**** h****onest.**** V****icky**** F****robisher**** a****nd**** G****eoffrey**** H****ooper**** b****oth**** f****lew**** b****etter**** t****his**** e****vening,**** b****ut**** H****ooper's**** a r****eal**** w****hiner,**** h****e's**** a****lways**** m****oaning**** a****bout**** s****omething**** o****r**** o****ther,**** a****nd**** V****icky's**** i****nvolved**** i****n**** a****ll**** s****orts**** o****f**** s****ocieties.**** S****he**** a****dmitted**** h****erself**** t****hat**** i****f**** t****raining**** c****lashed**** w****ith**** h****er**** C****harms**** C****lub**** s****he'd**** p****ut**** C****harms**** f****irst.**

"Oh well, at the least he was third best," Peter said weakly.

"He'll get better," Remus said.

"**Anyway,**** w****e're**** h****aving**** a p****ractice**** s****ession**** a****t**** t****wo**** o'****clock**** t****omorrow,**** s****o**** j****ust**** m****ake**** s****ure**** y****ou're**** t****here**** t****his**** t****ime.**** A****nd**** d****o**** m****e**** a f****avour**** a****nd**** h****elp**** R****on**** a****s**** m****uch**** a****s**** y****ou**** c****an,**** O****K?" He**** n****odded,**** a****nd**** A****ngelina**** s****trolled**** b****ack**** t****o**** A****licia**** S****pinnet.**** H****arry**** m****oved**** o****ver**** t****o**** s****it**** n****ext**** t****o**** H****ermione,**** w****ho ****woke**** w****ith**** a j****erk**** a****s**** h****e**** p****ut**** d****own**** h****is**** b****ag.**

"**Oh, ****H****arry,**** i****t's**** y****ou**** Good**** a****bout**** R****on,**** i****sn't**** i****t?" she**** s****aid**** b****learily. "I'm**** j****ust**** s****o**** –****so-so**** t****ired," she**** y****awned. "I**** w****as**** u****p**** u****ntil**** o****ne ****o'****clock**** m****aking**** m****ore**** h****ats.**** T****hey're**** d****isappearing**** l****ike**** m****ad!"**

"Some other student is probably picking them up," James said.

"Either that or, like Ron said, they just don't count as proper clothes," Sirius snickered.

**And**** s****ure**** e****nough,**** n****ow**** t****hat**** h****e**** l****ooked,**** H****arry**** s****aw**** t****hat**** t****here**** w**** ere**** w****oolly**** h****ats**** c****oncealed**** a****ll**** a****round**** t****he**** r****oom**** w****here**** u****nwary**** e****lves**** m****ight**** a****ccidentally**** p****ick**** t****hem**** u****p. "Great," said**** H****arry**** d****istractedly;**** i****f**** h****e**** d****id**** n****ot**** t****ell**** s****omebody**** s****oon,**** h****e**** w****ould**** b****urst. "Listen,**** H****ermione,**** I w****as**** j****ust**** u****p**** i****n**** U****mbridge's**** o****ffice**** a****nd**** s****he**** t****ouched**** m****y**** a****rm" **

**Hermione**** l****istened**** c****losely.**** W****hen**** H****arry**** h****ad**** f****inished,**** s****he**** s****aid**** s****lowly, "You're**** w****orried**** Y****ou****-****Know****-****Who's**** c****ontrolling**** h****er**** l****ike**** h****e**** c****ontrolled**** Q****uirrell?"**

"Maybe he's controlling her, but not like Quirrell," Sirius said. "Voldemort possessed Quirrell because he had no body, he doesn't need to do that now."

**"Well," said**** H****arry,**** d****ropping**** h****is**** v****oice, "it's**** a p****ossibility,**** i****sn't**** i****t?"**

"**I**** s****uppose**** s****o," said**** H****ermione,**** t****hough**** s****he**** s****ounded**** u****nconvinced. "But**** I d****on't**** t****hink**** h****e**** c****an**** b****e**** p****ossessing her**** t****he**** w****ay**** h****e**** p****ossessed**** Q****uirrell,**** I m****ean,**** h****e's**** p****roperly**** a****live**** a****gain**** n****ow,**** i****sn't**** h****e,**** h****e's**** g****ot**** h****is**** o****wn**** b****ody,**** h****e**** w****ouldn't**** n****eed**** t****o**** s****hare**** s****omeone**** e****lse's.**** H****e**** c****ould**** h****ave**** h****er**** u****nder**** t****he**** I****mperius**** C****urse,**** I s****uppose."**

"I don't see why Voldemort would bother with her anyway," James said. "She's just an old, twisted hag."  
"With good connections," Remus reminded him.

"Well, there's that," James admitted.

**Harry**** w****atched**** F****red,**** G****eorge,**** a****nd**** L****ee**** J****ordan**** j****uggling**** e****mpty**** b****utterbeer**** b****ottles**** f****or**** a m****oment.**** W****hen**** H****ermione**** s****aid, "But**** l****ast**** y****ear**** y****our**** s****car**** h****urt**** w****hen**** n****obody**** w****as**** t****ouching**** y****ou,**** a****nd**** d****idn't**** D****umbledore**** s****ay**** i****t**** h****ad**** t****o**** d****o**** w****ith**** w****hat**** Y****ou****-****Know****-****Who**** w****as**** f****eeling**** a****t**** t****he**** t****ime?**** I m****ean,**** m****aybe**** t****his**** w****asn't**** a****nything**** t****o**** d****o**** w****ith Umbridge**** a****t**** a****ll,**** m****aybe it's**** j****ust**** c****oincidence**** i****t**** h****appened**** w****hile**** y****ou**** w****ere**** w****ith**** h****er?"**

"**She's**** e****vil," said**** H****arry**** f****latly.**** "T****wisted."**

"Don't forget sick, malicious, dreadful, a hag," Sirius counted on his fingers.

"**She's**** h****orrible,**** y****es,**** b****ut****Harry,**** I t****hink**** y****ou**** o****ught**** t****o**** t****ell**** D****umbledore**** y****our**** s****car**** h****urt." It**** w****as**** t****he**** s****econd**** t****ime**** i****n**** t****wo**** d****ays**** h****e**** h****ad**** b****een**** a****dvised**** t****o**** g****o**** t****o**** D****umbledore**** a****nd**** h****is**** a****nswer**** t****o**** H****ermione**** w****as**** j****ust**** t****he**** g****ame**** a****s**** h****is**** a****nswer**** t****o**** R****on. "I'm**** n****ot**** b****othering**** h****im**** w****ith**** t****his.**** L****ike**** y****ou**** j****ust**** s****aid,**** i****t's**** n****ot**** a b****ig**** d****eal.**** I****t's**** b****een**** h****urting ****o****n**** a****nd**** o****ff**** a****ll**** s****ummer. It**** w****as**** j****ust**** a b****it**** w****orse**** t****onight,**** t****hat's**** a****ll."**

"**Harry,**** I'****m**** s****ure**** D****umbledore**** w****ould**** w****ant**** t****o**** b****e**** b****othered**** b****y**** t****his."**

"**Yeah," said**** H****arry,**** b****efore**** h****e**** c****ould**** s****top**** h****imself, "that's**** t****he**** o****nly**** b****it**** o****f**** m****e**** D****umbledore**** c****ares**** a****bout,**** i****sn't**** i****t,**** m****y**** s****car?"**

"Harry James Potter, don't talk about your Headmaster that way!" Lily said sternly. "He does care about you, he's just avoiding you right now."

"**Don't**** s****ay**** t****hat,**** i****t's**** n****ot**** t****rue!" **

"**I**** t****hink****I'll**** w****rite**** a****nd**** t****ell**** S****irius**** a****bout**** i****t,**** s****ee**** w****hat**** h****e**** t****hinks."**

"**Harry,**** y****ou**** c****an't**** p****ut**** s****omething**** l****ike**** t****hat**** i****n**** a l****etter!" aid**** H****ermione,**** l****ooking**** a****larmed. "Don't**** y****ou**** r****emember,**** M****oody**** t****old**** u****s**** t****o**** b****e**** c****areful**** w****hat**** w****e**** p****ut**** i****n**** w****riting!**** W****e**** j****ust**** c****an't**** g****uarantee**** o****wls**** a****ren't**** b****eing**** i****ntercepted**** a****ny**** m****ore!"**

"They can't even write me?" Sirius demanded. "This week is turning even worse."

**"All right, all right, I won't tell him, then!" said Harry irritably. He got to his feet. "I'm going to bed. Tell Ron for me, will you?"**

**"Oh no," said Hermione, looking relieved, "if you're doing that means I can do too, without being rude. I'm absolutely exhausted and I want to make some more hats tomorrow. Listen, you can help me if you like, it's quite fun, I'm getting better, I can do pattern and bobbles and all sorts of things now."**

"That's just what he needs, less time for homework," Remus said.

**Harry looked into her face, which was shining with glee, and tried to look as though he was vaguely tempted by this offer. "Er, no, I don't think I will, thanks," he said. "Er-not tomorrow. I've got loads of homework to do." And he traipsed off to the boys' stairs, leaving her looking slightly disappointed.**

"Finally that chapter's over," James said. "I hope the next one will be better for Harry. Who wants to read next??  
"I'll do it," Remus said and James handed him the book.


	14. Percy and Padfoot

— **CHAPTER FOURTEEN — **

**Percy and Padfoot**

"Hey!" exclaimed Sirius. "I'm in the chapter title. That must mean I'm an important part of this chapter. Maybe I'll talk to Harry or send him a letter that'll help him." He looked happy.

"You're not the only important person in this chapter," pointed out Peter. "Percy's name is part of the chapter title, too."

"Why would Percy be important?" asked Lily. "He's left his family and hasn't had any contact with them. Unless something's happened that involves Percy and Harry heard about it."

**Harry was first to wake up in his dormitory next morning. He lay for a moment watching dust swirl in the ray of sunlight coming through the gap in his four-posters hangings, and savoured the thought that it was Saturday. The first week of term seemed to have dragged on forever, like one gigantic History of Magic lesson.**

"Yeah, it has," said James, making a face. "It was worse than our first week of OWL year."

**Judging by the sleepy silence and the freshly minted look of that beam of sunlight, it was just after daybreak. He pulled open the curtains around his bed, got up and started to dress. The only sound apart from the distant twittering of birds was the slow, deep breathing of his fellow Gryffindors. He opened his schoolbag carefully, pulled out parchment and quill and headed out of the dormitory for the common room.**

**Making straight for his favourite squashy old armchair beside the now extinct fire, Harry settled himself down comfortably and unrolled his parchment while looking around the room. The detritus of crumpled-up bits of parchment, old Gobstones, empty ingredient jars and sweet wrappers that usually covered the common room at the end of each day was gone, as were all Hermione's elf hats. Wondering vaguely how many elves had now been set free whether they wanted to be or not, Harry uncorked his ink bottle, dipped his quill into it, then held it suspended an inch above the smooth yellowish surface of his parchment, thinking hard… but after a minute or so he found himself staring into the empty grate, at a complete loss for what to say.**

**He could now appreciate how hard it had been for Ron and Hermione to write him letters over the summer. How was he supposed to tell Sirius everything that had happened over the past week and pose all the questions he was burning to ask without giving potential letter-thieves a lot of information he did not want them to have?**

They all shrugged. "Well, for one thing, don't address your letter to Sirius," said Remus. "Address it to Snuffles. And then come up with some sort of code, I guess."

**He sat quite motionless for a while, gazing into the fireplace, then, finally coming to a decision, he dipped his quill into the ink bottle once more and set it resolutely on the parchment. **

_**Dear Snuffles,**_

_**Hope you're OK, the first week back here's been terrible, I'm really glad it's the weekend.**_

_**We've got a new Defence**__**Against**__**the Dark Arts teacher, Professor Umbridge. She's nearly as nice as your mum. I'm writing because that thing I wrote to you about last summer happened again last night when I was doing a detention with Umbrige**_

_**We're all**__**missing**__**our biggest friend, we hope he'll be back soon**_

_**Please write back quickly.**_

_**Best,**_

_**Harry**_

"That doesn't sound dangerous," said Lily. "If I had no idea what was going on, I wouldn't learn anything from reading the letter."

"Yeah," said Remus. "Harry did a good job writing this letter."

**Harry reread the letter several times, trying to see it from the point of view of an outsider. He could not see how they would know what he was talking about - or who he was talking to - just from reading this letter. He did hope Sirius would pick up the hint about Hagrid and tell them when he might be back. Harry did not want to ask directly in case it drew too much attention to what Hagrid might be up to while he was not at Hogwarts.**

"That's smart of Harry," said James. "Now, let's just hope that Sirius won't be thick enough to not recognize the hint."

"Hey!" protested Sirius. "I'm smart! I got O's and E's in all my OWLs last year, except for History of Magic and Muggle Studies."

"You only got them because you could do all the spells and knew what to do," pointed out Remus. "You didn't do much studying at all, or you wouldn't have gotten a P in History of Magic and an A in Muggle Studies."

**Considering it was a very short letter, it had taken a long time to write; sunlight had crept halfway across the room while he had been working on it and he could now hear distant sounds of movement from the dormitories above. Sealing the parchment carefully, he climbed through the portrait hole and headed off for the Owlery.**

**'I would **_**not**_** go that way if I were you,' said Nearly Headless Nick, drifting disconcertingly through a wall just ahead of Harry as he walked down the passage. 'Peeves is planning an amusing joke on the next person to pass the bust of Paracelsus halfway down the corridor.'**

"And I suppose the amusing joke is for Paracelsus to fall on top of the person's head," remarked Lily, shaking her head in disgust and annoyance.

**'Does it involve Paracelsus falling on top of the person's head?' asked Harry.**

**'Funnily enough, it **_**does**_**,' said Nearly Headless Nick in a bored voice. 'Subtlety has never been Peeves's strong point. I'm off to try and find the Bloody Baron… he might be able to put a stop to it… see you, Harry.'**

**'Yeah, bye,' said Harry and instead of turning right, he turned left, taking a longer but safer route up to the Owlery. His spirits rose as he walked past window after window showing brilliantly blue sky; he had training later; he would be back on the Quidditch pitch at last.**

Sirius and James cheered, while Lily frowned and said, "There's more to life than Quidditch."

The two stared at her as if she was crazy. "Lily, Harry had a terrible week," said Remus. "He likes playing Quidditch, and it'll help him get over everything that's happened."

**Something brushed his ankles. He looked down and saw the caretaker's skeletal grey cat, Mrs. Norris, slinking past him. She turned lamplike yellow eyes on him for a moment before disappearing behind a statue of Wilfred the Wistful.**

**'I'm not doing anything wrong,' Harry called after her. She had the unmistakeable air of a cat that was of to report to her boss, yet Harry could not see why; he was perfectly entitled to walk up to the Owlery on a Saturday morning.**

"Yeah!" exclaimed Peter. "Mrs. Norris doesn't have any reason to report to Filch."

**The sun was high in the sky now and when Harry entered the Owlery the glassless windows dazzled his eyes; thick silvery beams of sunlight crisscrossed the circular room in which hundreds of owls nestled on rafters, a little restless in the early-morning light, some clearly just returned from hunting. The straw-covered floor crunched a little as he stepped across tiny animal bones, craning his neck for a sight of Hedwig.**

**"There you are," he said, spotting her somewhere near the very top of the vaulted ceiling. "Get down here, I've got a letter for you."**

**With a low hoot she stretched her great white wings and soared down on to his shoulder.**

**'Right, I know this says Snuffles on the outside,' he told her, giving her the letter to clasp in her beak and, without knowing exactly why, whispering, 'but it's for Sirius, OK?'**

**She blinked her amber eyes once and he took that to mean that she understood.**

"Hedwig really is a smart owl," commented James. "It's almost as if she's an Animagus."

"Well, if she was, I think we'd have figured that out by now," said Remus.

**'Safe flight, then,' said Harry and he carried her to one of the windows; with a moment's pressure on his arm, Hedwig took off into the blindingly bright sky. He watched her until she became a tiny black speck and vanished, then switched his gaze to Hagrid's hut, clearly visible from this window, and just as clearly uninhabited, the chimney smokeless, the curtains drawn.**

**The treetops of the Forbidden Forest swayed in a light breeze. Harry watched them, savouring the fresh air on his face, thinking about Quidditch later… then he saw it. A great, reptilian winged horse, just like the ones pulling the Hogwarts carriages, with leathery black wings spread wide like a pterodactyl's, rose up out of the trees like a grotesque, giant bird. It soared in a great circle, then plunged back into the trees. The whole thing had happened so quickly, Harry could hardly believe what he had seen, except that his heart was hammering madly.**

"Harry, you're not crazy," said Lily patiently. "It's a thestral, and you can see them because you saw Cedric die."

**The Owlery door opened behind him. He leapt in shock and, turning quickly, saw Cho Chang holding a letter and a parcel in her hands.**

Sirius grinned wickedly. "Oooh, I wonder how this meeting will turn out."

"Sirius!" exclaimed Lily. "Stop making fun of my son's crush!"

**'Hi,' said Harry automatically.**

**'Oh… hi,' she said breathlessly. 'I didn't think anyone would be up here this early… I only remembered five minutes ago, it's my mum's birthday.'**

**She held up the parcel.**

**'Right,' said Harry. His brain seemed to have jammed. He wanted to say something funny and interesting, but the memory of that terrible winged horse was fresh in his mind.**

**'Nice day,' he said, gesturing to the windows. His insides seemed to shrivel with embarrassment. The weather. He was talking about the **_**weather**_**…**

Sirius started laughing, and James did his best to stifle his laughter. Even Remus and Peter were doing their best to keep straight faces. "Oh dear," said Lily sympathetically. "I wish I could be there to help Harry come up with some good conversation topics."

Remus hid a smile and said, "Uh, Lily, I really don't think Harry would like to have his mother around while he's with Cho. Would you if you were with James?" Lily blushed.

**'Yeah,' said Cho, looking around for a suitable owl. 'Good Quidditch conditions. 1 haven't been out all week, have you?'**

**'No,' said Harry.**

**Cho had selected one of the school barn owls. She coaxed it down on to her arm where it held out an obliging leg so that she could attach the parcel.**

**'Hey, has Gryffindor got a new Keeper yet?' she asked.**

**'Yeah,' said Harry. 'It's my friend Ron Weasley, d'you know him?'**

**'The Tornados-hater?' said Cho rather coolly. 'Is he any good?'**

**'Yeah,' said Harry, 'I think so. I didn't see his tryout, though, I was in detention.'**

**Cho looked up, the parcel only half-attached to the owl's legs.**

**'That Umbridge woman's foul,' she said in a low voice. 'Putting you in detention just because you told the truth about how - how - how he died. Everyone heard about it, it was all over the school. You were really brave standing up to her like that.'**

"That's great!" exclaimed Sirius, forgetting about teasing over Harry's crush. "Cho believes Harry and everything." Then he focused on the last sentence. "She thinks he's brave? Interesting. It looks as if she might return his feelings." He grinned, while Lily rolled her eyes.

**Harry's insides re-inflated so rapidly he felt as though he might actually float a few inches off the dropping-strewn floor. Who cared about a stupid flying horse; Cho thought he had been really brave. For a moment, he considered accidentally-on-purpose showing her his cut hand as he helped her tie her parcel on to her owl… but the very instant this thrilling thought occurred, the Owlery door opened again.**

**Filch the caretaker came wheezing into the room. There were purple patches on his sunken, veined cheeks, his jowls were aquiver and his thin grey hair dishevelled; he had obviously run here. Mrs. Norris came trotting at his heels, gazing up at the owls overhead and mewing hungrily. There was a restless shifting of wings from above and a large brown owl snapped his beak in a menacing fashion.**

"What is Filch doing there?" demanded James. "Harry and Cho aren't doing anything wrong."

**'Aha!' said Filch, taking a flat-footed step towards Harry, his pouchy cheeks trembling with anger. 'I've had a tip-off that you are intending to place a massive order for Dungbombs!"**

"_What_?" snapped Remus. "Who told Filch that Harry was ordering Dungbombs? Especially when he's not even ordering any."

**Harry folded his arms and stared at the caretaker.**

**'Who told you I was ordering Dungbombs?'**

**Cho was looking from Harry to Filch, also frowning; the barn owl on her arm, tired of standing on one leg, gave an admonitory hoot but she ignored it.**

**'I have my sources,' said Filch in a self-satisfied hiss. 'Now hand over whatever it is you're sending.'**

"Harry can't!" said Peter triumphantly. "He already sent his letter to Sirius."

**Feeling immensely thankful that he had not dawdled in posting off the letter, Harry said, 'I can't, it's gone.'**

_**Gone**_**?' said Filch, his face contorting with rage.**

**'Gone,' said Harry calmly.**

**Filch opened his mouth furiously, mouthed for a few seconds, then raked Harry's robes with his eyes.**

**'How do I know you haven't got it in your pocket?'**

**'Because -'**

**'I saw him send it,' said Cho angrily.**

"That's nice of her," said Lily. "Covering for Harry."

**Filch rounded on her.**

**'You saw him -?'**

**'That's right, I saw him,' she said fiercely.**

**There was a moment's pause in which Filch glared at Cho and Cho glared right back, then the caretaker turned on his heel and shuffled back towards the door. He stopped with his hand on the handle and looked back at Harry.**

**'If I get so much as a whiff of a Dungbomb...'**

"You won't," snapped James. "Not from Harry, at any rate."

**He stumped off down the stairs. Mrs. Norris cast a last longing look at the owls and followed him.**

**Harry and Cho looked at each other.**

**'Thanks,' Harry said.**

**'No problem,' said Cho, finally fixing the parcel to the barn owl's other leg, her face slightly pink. 'You **_**weren't**_** ordering Dungbombs, were you?'**

**'No,' said Harry.**

**'I wonder why he thought you were, then?' she said as she carried the owl to the window.**

"He probably didn't," said Remus sourly. "He probably made it up as an excuse to read Harry's letter. Maybe Umbridge put Filch up to it." Sirius quickly jotted down an item on the Umbridge, or rather Umbitch, list, and then put down what Filch did on the miscellaneous list/

**Harry shrugged. He was quite as mystified by that as she was, though oddly it was not bothering him very much at the moment.**

**They left the Owlery together. At the entrance of a corridor that led towards the west wing of the castle, Cho said, 'I'm going this way. Well, I'll… I'll see you around, Harry.'**

**'Yeah… see you.'**

**She smiled at him and departed. Harry walked on, feeling quietly elated. He had managed to have an entire conversation with her and not embarrassed himself once… **_**you were really brave standing up to her like that**_**… Cho had called him brave… she did not hate him for being alive…**

"Why should she?" asked Peter. Then he blinked. "Oh right, Cedric."

**Of course, she had preferred Cedric, he knew that… though if he'd only asked her to the Ball before Cedric had, things might have turned out differently… she had seemed sincerely sorry that she'd had to refuse when Harry asked her…**

"Yeah, she did," said James. "Maybe Harry will break the Potter trend."

"What Potter trend?" asked Lily curiously.

"The one where all Potter men seem to be attracted to redheads and end up marrying one," replied James. "You're a redhead, and I apparently marry you in the future. And my mum's a redhead, my grandmum was one, and Dad says his grandmother was a redhead too."

Lily blushed. Remus pointed out, "Harry is only fifteen. Just because he likes Cho now doesn't mean he'll be that way forever. He could end up following the Potter trend and end up with, oh, Ginny, for instance, because she's a redhead. Or any other girl with red hair."

"Do you want Harry's relationship with Cho to fail or something, Remus?" demanded Sirius.

"No! I don't! I was just being logical and pointing out the truth and –"

"Well, sometimes you don't need to do that," said Sirius.

**'Morning,' Harry said brightly to Ron and Hermione as he joined them at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall.**

**'What are you looking so pleased about?' said Ron, eyeing Harry in surprise.**

"His relatively pleasant meeting with Cho," said James.

**'Erm… Quidditch later,' said Harry happily, pulling a large platter of bacon and eggs towards him.**

**'Oh… yeah…' said Ron. He put down the piece of toast he was eating and took a large swig of pumpkin juice. Then he said, 'Listen… you don't fancy going out a bit earlier with me, do you? Just to - er - give me some practice before training? So I can, you know, get my eye in a bit.'**

**'Yeah, OK,' said Harry.**

**'Look, I don't think you should,' said Hermione seriously. 'You're both really behind on homework as it -'**

"But think of the terrible week Harry had!" cried James. "He needs something to help him relax! Doing homework isn't going to help him with that. Besides, he has Sunday to do it."

**But she broke off; the morning post was arriving and, as usual, the **_**Daily Prophet**_** was soaring towards her in the beak of a screech owl, which landed perilously close to the sugar bowl and held out a leg. Hermione pushed a Knut into its leather pouch, took the newspaper, and scanned the front page critically as the owl took off.**

**'Anything interesting?' said Ron. Harry grinned, knowing Ron was keen to keep her off the subject of homework.**

**'No,' she sighed, 'just some guff about the bass player in the Weird Sisters getting married.'**

**Hermione opened the paper and disappeared behind it. Harry devoted himself to another helping of eggs and bacon. Ron was staring up at the high windows, looking slightly preoccupied.**

**'Wait a moment,' said Hermione suddenly. 'Oh no… Sirius!'**

"What about me?" asked Sirius.

**'What's happened?' said Harry, snatching at the paper so violently it ripped down the middle, with him and Hermione each holding one half.**

**"**_**'The Ministry of Magic has received a tip-off from a reliable source that Sirius Black, notorious mass murderer… blah blah blah… is currently hiding in London!'" **_**Hermione read from her half in an anguished whisper.**

"Oh no!" gasped Lily, staring at Sirius in concern. "It must have been Lucius Malfoy. He had to have had recognised you on the platform, Sirius."

**'Lucius Malfoy, I'll bet anything,' said Harry in a low, furious voice. 'He did recognise Sirius on the platform…'**

**'What?' said Ron, looking alarmed. 'You didn't say -'**

'**Shh!' said the other two.**

"… ___**Ministry warns**__**wizarding community that Black is very dangerous… killed thirteen people… broke out of Azkaban**_** …' the usual rubbish," Hermione concluded, laying down her half of the paper and looking fearfully at Harry and Ron. 'Well, he just won't be able to leave the house again, that's all,' she whispered. 'Dumbledore did warn him not to.'**

**Harry looked down glumly at the bit of the **_**Prophet**_** he had torn off. Most of the page was devoted to an advertisement for Madam Malkins Robes for All Occasions, which was apparently having a sale.**

**'Hey!' he said, flattening it down so Hermione and Ron could see it. 'Look at this!'**

**'I've got all the robes I want,' said Ron.**

**'No,' said Harry. 'Look… this little piece here…'**

"What little piece?" asked Peter.

"If you'd be quiet and let me keep reading, we'd find out," said Remus.

**Ron and Hermione bent closer to read it; the item was barely an inch long and placed right at the bottom of a column. It was headlined:**

_**TRESPASS AT**__**MINISTRY **_

_**Sturgis Podmore, 38, of number two, Laburnum Gardens, Clapham, has appeared in front of the Wizengamot charged with trespass and attempted robbery at the Ministry of Magic on**__**31st August**__**Podmore was arrested by Ministry of Magic watchwizard Eric Munch, who found him attempting to force his way through a top-security door at one o'clock in the morning. Podmore, who refused to speak in his own defence, was convicted on both charges and sentenced to six months in Azkaban**_

"Sturgis Podmore," said James, frowning. "He's an Order member, isn't he? Wasn't Moody really annoyed when Sturgis didn't turn up to be part of the guard going to King's Cross?"

"Yes, he was," said Lily, also frowning. "What was he doing in the Ministry at one in the morning? Especially when he's on duty the next day?"

**'Sturgis Podmore?' said Ron slowly. 'He's that bloke who looks like his head's been thatched, isn't he? He's one of the Ord—'**

**'Ron, shh!' said Hermione, casting a terrified look around them.**

**'Six months in Azkaban!' whispered Harry, shocked. 'Just for trying to get through a door!'**

**'Don't be silly, it wasn't just for trying to get through a door. What on earth was he doing at the Ministry of Magic at one o'clock in the morning?' breathed Hermione.**

**'D'you reckon he was doing something for the Order?' Ron muttered.**

"Why would Sturgis be doing something for the Order when he's supposed to be part of the guard the next day?" inquired Remus. "It doesn't make any sense."

"Maybe the Order didn't think he'd be arrested?" suggested Peter. The others shrugged.

**'Wait a moment…' said Harry slowly. 'Sturgis was supposed to come and see us off, remember?'**

**The other two looked at him.**

**'Yeah, he was supposed to be part of our guard going to King's Cross, remember? And Moody was all annoyed because he didn't turn up; so he couldn't have been on a job for them, could he?'**

**'Well, maybe they didn't expect him to get caught,' said Hermione.**

**'It could be a frame-up!' Ron exclaimed excitedly. 'No - listen!' he went on, dropping his voice dramatically at the threatening look on Hermione's face. 'The Ministry suspects he's one of Dumbledore's lot so - I dunno - they **_**lured**_** him to the Ministry, and he wasn't trying to get through a door at all! Maybe they've just made something up to get him!'**

There was a moment of silence. "That does make sense," said James finally.

**There was a pause while Harry and Hermione considered this. Harry thought it seemed far-fetched. Hermione, on the other hand, looked rather impressed.**

**'Do you know, I wouldn't be at all surprised if that were true.'**

"We wouldn't be, either," said Sirius.

**She folded up her half of the newspaper thoughtfully. As Harry laid down his knife and fork, she seemed to come out of a reverie.**

**'Right, well, I think we should tackle that essay for Sprout on self-fertilising shrubs first and if we're lucky we'll be able to start McGonagall's Inanimatus Conjurus Spell before lunch…'**

"It's useless to expect Harry and Ron to start their homework now," said Lily in a resigned tone of voice. "They'll be off practicing Quidditch until the proper practice session later."

**Harry felt a small twinge of guilt at the thought of the pile of homework awaiting him upstairs, but the sky was a clear, exhilarating blue, and he had not been on his Firebolt for a week…**

**'I mean, we can do it tonight,' said Ron, as he and Harry walked down the sloping lawns towards the Quidditch pitch, their broomsticks over their shoulders, and with Hermione's dire warnings that they would fail all their OWLs still ringing in their ears. 'And we've got tomorrow. She gets too worked up about work, that's her trouble…' **

"That's true," said James. "Hermione needs to relax a bit. She's already the top student in their year. She can afford to relax once in a while."

**There was a pause and he added, in a slightly more anxious tone, 'D'you think she meant it when she said we weren't copying from her?'**

"Yes, she means it," said Sirius. "Hermione hasn't let you copy her work since you became friends with her. All she does is check your work for you."

**'Yeah, I do,' said Harry. 'Still, this is important, too, we've got to practise if we want to stay on the Quidditch team…'**

**'Yeah, that's right,' said Ron, in a heartened tone. 'And we have got plenty of time to do it all…'**

**As they approached the Quidditch pitch, Harry glanced over to his right to where the trees of the Forbidden Forest were swaying darkly. Nothing flew out of them; the sky was empty but for a few distant owls fluttering around the Owlery tower. He had enough to worry about; the flying horse wasn't doing him any harm; he pushed it out of his mind.**

**They collected balls from the cupboard in the changing room and set to work, Ron guarding the three tall goalposts, Harry playing Chaser and trying to get the Quaffle past Ron. Harry thought Ron was pretty good; he blocked three-quarters of the goals Harry attempted to put past him and played better the longer they practised. **

"Not bad," remarked James. "Ron's improving. And it looks as if Harry does have some of my talents as Chaser."

"He also has a little of my Beater skills," said Sirius. "In the first book, he hit the Bludger Oliver Wood let out pretty hard."

**After a couple of hours they returned to the castle for lunch – during which Hermione made it quite clear she thought they were irresponsible – then returned to the Quidditch pitch for the real training session. All their teammates but Angelina were already in the changing room when they entered.**

**'All right, Ron?' said George, winking at him.**

**'Yeah,' said Ron, who had become quieter and quieter all the way down to the pitch.**

**'Ready to show us all up, Ickle Prefect?' said Fred, emerging tousle-haired from the neck of his Quidditch robes, a slightly malicious grin on his face.**

"Oh, please shut up, Fred!" snapped Lily. "Your teasing is not going to help Ron any!"

**'Shut up,' said Ron, stony-faced, pulling on his own team robes for the first time. They fitted him well considering they had been Oliver Wood's, who was rather broader in the shoulder.**

**'OK, everyone,' said Angelina, entering from the Captain's office, already changed. 'Let's get to it; Alicia and Fred, if you can just bring out the ball crate for us. Oh, and there are a couple of people out there watching but I want you to just ignore them, all right?'**

"I bet it's the Slytherins," said Sirius darkly. "They're going to disrupt the practice and make fun of Ron, no doubt." He pulled out his Slytherin list and began adding to it.

**Something in her would-be casual voice made Harry think he might know who the uninvited spectators were, and sure enough, when they left the changing room for the bright sunlight of the pitch it was to a storm of catcalls and jeers from the Slytherin Quidditch team and assorted hangers-on, who were grouped halfway up the empty stands and whose voices echoed loudly around the stadium.**

**"What's that Weasley's riding?" Malfoy called in his sneering drawl. "Why would anyone put a flying charm on a mouldy old log like that?"**

"A Cleansweep Eleven is not a mouldy old log!" snapped James. "It's a perfectly decent broom, probably as fast as the Nimbus One Thousand is now."

**Crabbe, Goyle and Pansy Parkinson guffawed and shrieked with laughter. Ron mounted his broom and kicked off from the ground and Harry followed him, watching his ears turn red from behind. **

**'Ignore them,' he said, accelerating to catch up with Ron, 'we'll see who's laughing after we play them…'**

"That's the right attitude, Harry," said Sirius, busily writing.

**'Exactly the attitude I want, Harry,' said Angelina approvingly, soaring around them with the Quaffle under her arm and slowing to hover on the spot in front of her airborne team. 'OK, everyone, we're going to start with some passes just to warm up, the whole team please -'**

**'Hey, Johnson, what's with that hairstyle, anyway?' shrieked Pansy Parkinson from below. 'Why would anyone want to look like they've got worms coming out of their head?' **

"Ugh," said Lily. "She's as annoying as Malfoy. If Harry had been a girl instead of a boy, she'd probably be enemies with Pansy."

**Angelina swept her long braided hair out of her face and continued calmly, 'Spread out, then, and let's see what we can do…' **

**Harry reversed away from the others to the far side of the pitch. Ron fell back towards the opposite goal. Angelina raised the Quaffle with one hand and threw it hard to Fred, who passed to George, who passed to Harry, who passed to Ron, who dropped it. **

"And the Slytherins will no doubt laugh about it, making Ron nervous," said Remus, shaking his head.

**The Slytherins, led by Malfoy, roared and screamed with laughter. Ron, who had pelted towards the ground to catch the Quaffle before it landed, pulled out of the dive untidily, so that he slipped sideways on his broom, and returned to playing height, blushing. Harry saw Fred and George exchange looks, but uncharacteristically neither of them said anything, for which he was grateful. **

"That's a relief," said Peter. "I guess they think the Slytherins laughing is enough suffering."

**'Pass it on, Ron,' called Angelina, as though nothing had happened. **

**Ron threw the Quaffle to Alicia, who passed back to Harry, who passed to George… **

**'Hey, Potter, how's your scar feeling?' called Malfoy. 'Sure you don't need a lie down? It must be, what, a whole week since you were in the hospital wing, that's a record for you, isn't it?'**

"SHUT UP!" shouted Sirius angrily. He snapped the tip of his quill and caused an inkblot to appear. "UGH! This is your effing fault too, Malfoy!"

The others exchanged looks, then with a sigh, Remus pulled out his wand and siphoned off the ink as Sirius was too annoyed with Malfoy to do magic properly. Lily mended the quill and Sirius then quickly jotted down, "Making me mad so I broke my quill and made a blot."

**George passed to Angelina; she reverse-passed to Harry, who had not been expecting it, but caught it in the very tips of his fingers and passed it quickly to Ron, who lunged for it and missed by inches. **

**'Come on now, Ron,' said Angelina crossly, as he dived for the ground again, chasing the Quaffle. 'Pay attention.' **

**It would have been hard to say whether Ron's face or the Quaffle was a deeper scarlet when he again returned to playing height. Malfoy and the rest of the Slytherin team were howling with laughter. **

"I really want to hex them into oblivion," muttered Lily angrily.

**On his third attempt, Ron caught the Quaffle; perhaps out of relief he passed it on so enthusiastically that it soared straight through Katie's outstretched hands and hit her hard in the face. **

**'Sorry!' Ron groaned, zooming forwards to see whether he had done any damage. **

**'Get back in position, she's fine!' barked Angelina. 'But as you're passing to a teammate, do try not to knock her off her broom, won't you? We've got Bludgers for that!' **

**Katie's nose was bleeding. Down below, the Slytherins were stamping their feet and jeering. Fred and George converged on Katie. **

**'Here, take this,' Fred told her, handing her something small and purple from out of his pocket, 'it'll clear it up in no time.' **

"Must be an antidote to one of their Skivving Snackbox products," said Peter.

**'All right,' called Angelina, 'Fred, George, go and get your bats and a Bludger. Ron, get up to the goalposts. Harry, release the Snitch when I say so. We're going to aim for Ron's goal, obviously.' **

**Harry zoomed off after the twins to fetch the Snitch. **

**'Ron's making a right pig's ear of things, isn't he?'' muttered George, as the three of them landed at the crate containing the balls and opened it to extract one of the Bludgers and the Snitch. **

**''He's just nervous,' said Harry, 'he was fine when I was practising with him this morning.' **

**'Yeah, well, I hope he hasn't peaked too soon,' said Fred gloomily. **

"Me too," said James. "Or Angelina's going to regret making Ron Keeper."

**They returned to the air. When Angelina blew her whistle, Harry released the Snitch and Fred and George let fly the Bludger. From that moment on, Harry was barely aware of what the others were doing. It was his job to recapture the tiny fluttering golden ball that was worth a hundred and fifty points to the Seeker's team and doing so required enormous speed and skill. He accelerated, rolling and swerving in and out of the Chasers, the warm autumn air whipping his face, and the distant yells of the Slytherins so much meaningless roaring in his ears… but too soon, the whistle brought him to a halt again. **

**'Stop - stop - STOP!' screamed Angelina. 'Ron - you're not covering your middle post!' **

**Harry looked round at Ron, who was hovering in front of the left-hand hoop, leaving the other two completely unprotected. **

"Great," muttered Sirius. "Doesn't Ron know that he has to stay around the middle hoop or circle the hoops, not hover to one side? You're going to let goals in that way."

**'Oh… sorry…' **

**'You keep shifting around while you're watching the Chasers!' said Angelina. 'Either stay in centre position until you have to move to defend a hoop, or else circle the hoops, but don't drift vaguely off to one side, that's how you let in the last three goals!' **

**'Sorry…' Ron repeated, his red face shining like a beacon against the bright blue sky. **

"This is not good," said James, shaking his head. "Ron's too nervous to do well."

**'And Katie, can't you do something about that nosebleed?' **

**'It's just getting worse!' said Katie thickly, attempting to stem the flow with her sleeve. **

**Harry glanced round at Fred, who was looking anxious and checking his pockets. He saw Fred pull out something purple, examine it for a second and then look round at Katie, evidently horror-struck. **

"It looks like Fred gave her one of their products instead," said Remus, shaking his head.

**'Well, let's try again,' said Angelina. She was ignoring the Slytherins, who had now set up a chant of '**_**Gryffindor are losers, Gryffindor are**__**losers**_**,' but there was a certain rigidity about her seat on the broom nevertheless. **

**This time they had been flying for barely three minutes when Angelina's whistle sounded. Harry, who had just sighted the Snitch circling the opposite goalpost, pulled up feeling distinctly aggrieved. **

"I would too," said James. "Did Ron do something wrong again?"

**'What now?' he said impatiently to Alicia, who was nearest. **

**'Katie,' she said shortly. **

**Harry turned and saw Angelina, Fred and George all flying as fast as they could towards Katie. Harry and Alicia sped towards her, too. It was plain that Angelina had stopped training just in time; Katie was now chalk white and covered in blood. **

**'She needs the hospital wing,' said Angelina. **

**'We'll take her,' said Fred. 'She - er - might have swallowed a Blood Blisterpod by mistake -' **

"Thought so," muttered Remus. "They really should check their stuff more carefully before handing them out."

**'Well, there's no point continuing with no Beaters and a Chaser gone,' said Angelina glumly as Fred and George zoomed off towards the castle supporting Katie between them. 'Come on, let's go and get changed.' **

"What a terrible practice session," said Sirius. "What with the stupid Slytherins making fun, Ron getting nervous and not doing well, and Katie's nosebleed." The others agreed.

**The Slytherins continued to chant as they trailed back into the changing rooms. **

**'How was practice?' asked Hermione rather coolly half an hour later, as Harry and Ron climbed through the portrait hole into the Gryffindor common room. **

**'It was -' Harry began. **

**'Completely lousy,' said Ron in a hollow voice, sinking into a chair beside Hermione. She looked up at Ron and her frostiness seemed to melt. **

"That's better," said James. "Maybe she'll have some words of comfort for Ron."

"Maybe, but Hermione doesn't always do a good job at comforting people," said Lily. "But at least she has more tact than Ron."

**'Well, it was only your first one,' she said consolingly, 'it's bound to take time to -' **

**'Who said it was me who made it lousy?' snapped Ron. **

"I told you," said Lily. "Hermione's effort at making Ron feel better isn't working."

**'No one,' said Hermione, looking taken aback, 'I thought -' **

**'You thought I was bound to be rubbish?' **

**'No, of course I didn't! Look, you said it was lousy so I just -' **

**'I'm going to get started on some homework,' said Ron angrily and stomped off to the staircase to the boys' dormitories and vanished from sight. Hermione turned to Harry. **

**'Was he lousy?' **

**'No,' said Harry loyally. **

"What a loyal friend," said Sirius. "He knows Ron didn't do that well, but won't say so."

"Considering who his parents and godfather are, it'd be odd if he wasn't," pointed out Remus. "You guys could have shunned me and told everyone I was a werewolf, but didn't."

James rolled his eyes. "Moony, you really need to stop bringing that up. We told you a million times already that we like you very much and think the prejudice against werewolves is stupid."

"Sorry," said Remus, face turning red. He quickly picked up the book and resumed reading.

**Hermione raised her eyebrows. **

**'Well, I suppose he could've played better,' Harry muttered, 'but it was only the first training session, like you said…' **

**Neither Harry nor Ron seemed to make much headway with their homework that night. Harry knew Ron was too preoccupied with how badly he had performed at Quidditch practice and he himself was having difficulty in getting the '**_**Gryffindor are**__**losers**_**' chant out of his head. **

"Gryffindors aren't losers!" snapped James. 'You're a great seeker, Harry. And you've got terrific chasers and beaters, and with a few more training sessions, Ron's going to be great too."

"Yeah," said Peter. "The Slytherins will be singing a different tune once Gryffindor wins the match against them."

**They spent the whole of Sunday in the common room, buried in their books while the room around them filled up, then emptied. It was another clear, fine day and most of their fellow Gryffindors spent the day out in the grounds, enjoying what might well be some of the last sunshine that year. By the evening, Harry felt as though somebody had been beating his brain against the inside of his skull. **

**'You know, we probably should try and get more homework done during the week,' Harry muttered to Ron, as they finally laid aside Professor McGonagall's long essay on the Inanimatus Conjurus Spell and turned miserably to Professor Sinistra's equally long and difficult essay about Jupiter's many moons. **

"Yeah, you should," said Lily. "But then again, that horrible, well, word that rhymes with witch, had to give you a week's worth of detentions, so you really didn't have much to do homework, Harry."

**'Yeah,' said Ron, rubbing slightly bloodshot eyes and throwing his fifth spoiled bit of parchment into the fire beside them. 'Listen… shall we just ask Hermione if we can have a look at what she's done?' **

"It's pointless," said Peter. "Hermione's not going to let you copy."

**Harry glanced over at her; she was sitting with Crookshanks on her lap and chatting merrily to Ginny as a pair of knitting needles flashed in midair in font of her, now knitting a pair of shapeless elf socks. **

**'No,' he said heavily, 'you know she won't let us.' **

**And so they worked on while the sky outside the windows became steadily darker. Slowly, the crowd in the common room began to thin again. At half past eleven, Hermione wandered over to them, yawning. **

**'Nearly done?' **

**'No,' said Ron shortly. **

**'Jupiter's biggest moon is Ganymede, not Callisto,' she said, pointing over Ron's shoulder at a line in his Astronomy essay, 'and it's Io that's got the volcanoes.' **

"At least she willing to check their work and point out errors," said Remus brightly.

**'Thanks,' snarled Ron, scratching out the offending sentences. **

**'Sorry, I only -' **

**'Yeah, well, if you've just come over here to criticise -' **

**'Ron -' **

**'I haven't got time to listen to a sermon, all right, Hermione, I'm up to my neck in it here -' **

**'No - look!' **

**Hermione was pointing to the nearest window. Harry and Ron both looked over. A handsome screech owl was standing on the windowsill, gazing into the room at Ron. **

**'Isn't that Hermes?' said Hermione, sounding amazed. **

"Who's Hermes?" asked Peter, looking puzzled.

"Percy's owl," replied Lily. "It was mentioned in the second book."

"Why is Percy suddenly writing to Ron?" asked James. "He's severed contact with his family."

"Maybe he's trying to get Ron to come over to his way of thinking," suggested Remus.

**'Blimey, it is!' said Ron quietly, throwing down his quill and getting to his feet. 'What's Percy writing to me for?' **

"Probably what Remus said," said Sirius.

**He crossed to the window and opened it; Hermes flew inside, landed on Ron's essay and held out a leg to which a letter was attached. Ron took the letter off it and the owl departed at once, leaving inky footprints across Ron's drawing of the moon Io. **

**'That's definitely Percy's handwriting,' said Ron, sinking back into his chair and staring at the words on the outside of the scroll: **_**Ronald Weasley, Gryffindor House, Hogwarts**_**. He looked up at the other two. 'What d'you reckon?' **

**'Open it!' said Hermione eagerly, and Harry nodded. **

**Ron unrolled the scroll and began to read. The further down the parchment his eyes travelled, the more pronounced became his scowl. **

"Looks what Percy wrote isn't to Ron's taste," said James. "I think what you suggested might be true, Remus. Percy's trying to get Ron over to his way of thinking."

**When he had finished reading, he looked disgusted. He thrust the letter at Harry and Hermione, who leaned towards each other to read it together: **

_**Dear Ron, **_

_**I have only just heard (from no less a person than the Minister for Magic himself, who has it from your new teacher, Professor Umbridge) that you have become a Hogwarts prefect. **_

_**I was most pleasantly surprised when I heard this news and must firstly offer my congratulations. I must admit that I have always been afraid that you would take what we might call the 'Fred and George' route, rather than following in my footsteps, so you can imagine my feelings on hearing you have stopped flouting authority and have decided to shoulder some real responsibility. **_

"Hey!" protested Sirius. "Ron's not completely happy with being prefect! And Harry was the more logical choice. Ron only got it because Dumbledore probably thought Harry had enough to deal with without having the added pressure of being prefect."

_**But I want to give you more than congratulations, Ron, I want to give you some advice, which is why I am sending this at night rather than by the usual morning post. Hopefully, you will be able to read this away from prying eyes and avoid awkward questions. **_

_**From something the Minister let slip when telling me you are now a prefect, I gather that you are still seeing a lot of Harry Potter. I must tell you, Ron, that nothing could put you in danger of losing your badge more than continued fraternisation with that boy. **_

"_What_?!?" demanded James angrily. "Ron would rather give up a million prefect badges than stop being Harry's friend! And the same goes for Hermione, for that matter."

_**Yes, I am sure you are surprised to hear this - no doubt you will say that Potter has always been Dumbledore's favourite - but I feel bound to tell you that Dumbledore may not be in charge at Hogwarts much longer and the people who count have a very different - and probably more accurate - view of Potter's behaviour. I shall say no more here, but if you look at the**_** Daily Prophet **_**tomorrow you will get a good idea of the way the wind is**__**blowing**_** - **_**and see if you can spot yours truly**_

"I cannot believe this!" raged Lily. "Percy's going too far! He knows Harry, he's gone to school with him for three years. He should know better than to think Harry's lying!"

_**Seriously, Ron, you do not want to be tarred with the same brush as Potter, it could be very damaging to your future prospects, and I am talking here about life after school, too. As you must be aware, given that our father escorted him to court, Potter had a disciplinary hearing this summer in front of the whole Wizengamot and he did not come out of it looking too good. He got off on a mere technicality, if you ask me, and many of the people I've spoken to remain convinced of his guilt. **_

"_Mere technicality_?" burst out James. "Harry was innocent! Dementors really did attack him!"

_**It may be that you are afraid to sever ties with Potter -**__**I**__**know that he can be unbalanced and, for all I know, violent - but if you have any worries about this, or have spotted anything else in Potter's behaviour that is troubling you, I urge you to speak to Dolores Umbridge, a truly delightful woman who I know will be only too happy to advise you**_

"Delightful woman?" asked Sirius. "Are we talking about the same person? That foul person deserves the nickname of Umbitch."

_**This leads me to my other bit of advice. As I have hinted above, Dumbledore's regime at Hogwarts may soon be over. Your loyalty, Ron, should be not to him, but to the school and the Ministry. I am very sorry to hear that, so far, Professor Umbridge is encountering very little co-operation from staff as she strives to make those necessary changes within Hogwarts that the Ministry so ardently desires (although she should find this easier from next week - again, see the**_** Daily Prophet **_**tomorrow!). I shall say only this - a student who shows himself willing to help Professor Umbridge now may be very well-placed for Head Boyship in a couple of years**_

"And Ron would cheerfully give up being Head Boy rather than be willing to help Umbitch," muttered James. "Merlin, it's a good thing the Defence position is cursed, because they'll only have to put up with her for a year. With the pattern going on, they're bound to get a competent teacher next year."

_**I am sorry that I was unable to see more of you over the summer. It pains me to criticise our parents, but I am afraid I can no longer live under their roof while they remain mixed up with the dangerous crowd around Dumbledore. (If you are writing to Mother at any point, you might tell her that a certain Sturgis Podmore, who is a great friend of Dumbledore's, has recently been sent to Azkaban for trespass at the Ministry. Perhaps that will open their eyes to the kind of petty criminals with whom they are currently rubbing shoulders.) I count myself very lucky to have escaped the stigma of association with such people - the Minister really could not be more gracious to me - and I do hope, Ron, that you will not allow family ties to blind you to the misguided nature of our parents' beliefs and actions, either. I sincerely hope that, in time, they will realise how mistaken they were and I shall, of course, be ready to accept a full apology when that day comes. **_

"They are not mistaken!" snapped Remus. "You're the one that should be apologising!"

_**Please think over what I have said most carefully, particularly the bit about Harry Potter, and congratulations again on becoming prefect. **_

_**Your brother, **_

_**Percy**_

**Harry looked up at Ron. **

**'Well,' he said, trying to sound as though he found the whole thing a joke, 'if you want to - er - what is it?' - he checked Percy's letter - "Oh yeah - 'sever ties' with me, I swear I won't get violent." **

**'Give it back,' said Ron, holding out his hand. 'He is -' Ron said jerkily, tearing Percy's letter in half, 'the world's -' he tore it into quarters, 'biggest -' he tore it into eighths, 'git.' **

"We agree with you, Ron," said James.

**He threw the pieces into the fire. **

**'Come on, we've got to get this finished sometime before dawn,' he said briskly to Harry, pulling Professor Sinistra's essay back towards him. **

**Hermione was looking at Ron with an odd expression on her face. **

**'Oh, give them here,' she said abruptly. **

**'What?' said Ron. **

**'Give them to me, I'll look through them and correct them,' she said. **

"That is awfully nice of her," said Lily, smiling. "One good thing came as a result of that letter."

**'Are you serious? Ah, Hermione, you're a life-saver,' said Ron, 'what can I -?' **

**"What you can say is, 'We promise we'll never leave our homework this late again,'" she said, holding out both hands for their essays, but she looked slightly amused all the same. **

**'Thanks a million, Hermione,' said Harry weakly, passing over his essay and sinking back into his armchair, rubbing his eyes. **

**It was now past midnight and the common room was deserted but for the three of them and Crookshanks. The only sound was that of Hermione's quill scratching out sentences here and there on their essays and the ruffle of pages as she checked various facts in the reference books strewn across the table. Harry was exhausted. He also felt an odd, sick, empty feeling in his stomach that had nothing to do with tiredness and everything to do with the letter now curling blackly in the heart of the fire. **

"Just ignore that letter," said Sirius. "Percy is a git and doesn't know any better."

**He knew that half the people inside Hogwarts thought him strange, even mad; he knew that the **_**Daily Prophet**_** had been making snide allusions to him for months, but there was something about seeing it written down like that in Percy's writing, about knowing that Percy was advising Ron to drop him and even to tell tales about him to Umbridge, that made his situation real to him as nothing else had. He had known Percy for four years, had stayed in his house during the summer holidays, shared a tent with him during the Quidditch World Cup, had even been awarded full marks by him in the second task of the Triwizard Tournament last year, yet now, Percy thought him unbalanced and possibly violent. **

"Well, Percy has always been ambitious," sighed Lily. "He wants to do well, and therefore he'll swallow whatever the Ministry's saying. I'm surprised he wasn't sorted into Slytherin with all that ambition he has."

**And with a surge of sympathy for his godfather, Harry thought Sirius was probably the only person he knew who could really understand how he felt at the moment, because Sirius was in the same situation. Nearly everyone in the wizarding world thought Sirius a dangerous murderer and a great Voldemort supporter and he had had to live with that knowledge for fourteen years… **

Sirius sighed. "Yeah. But maybe someday my name will be cleared and the Ministry will finally believe that Voldemort's returned."

**Harry blinked. He had just seen something in the fire that could not have been there. It had flashed into sight and vanished immediately. No… it could not have been… he had imagined it because he had been thinking about Sirius… **

**'OK, write that down,' Hermione said to Ron, pushing his essay and a sheet covered in her own writing back to Ron, 'then add this conclusion I've written for you.' **

**'Hermione, you are honestly the most wonderful person I've ever met,' said Ron weakly, 'and if I'm ever rude to you again -' **

**'- I'll know you're back to normal,' said Hermione. 'Harry, yours is OK except for this bit at the end, I think you must have misheard Professor Sinistra, Europa's covered in ice, not mice - Harry?' **

"Well, considering that there's no way to support life outside of Earth, Harry should have realized that Europa being covered with mice should be odd," said Lily.

**Harry had slid off his chair on to his knees and was now crouching on the singed and threadbare hearthrug, gazing into the flames. **

**'Er - Harry?' said Ron uncertainly. 'Why are you down there?' **

**'Because I've just seen Sirius's head in the fire,' said Harry. **

They all looked startled. Then Sirius said, "I must be planning to talk to Harry like I did last year. And that's probably why I'm part of the chapter title!"

**He spoke quite calmly; after all, he had seen Sirius's head in this very fire the previous year and talked to it, too; nevertheless, he could not be sure that he had really seen it this time… it had vanished so quickly… **

**'Sirius's head?' Hermione repeated. 'You mean like when he wanted to talk to you during the Triwizard Tournament? But he wouldn't do that now, it would be too - Sirius!' **

**She gasped, gazing at the fire; Ron dropped his quill. There in the middle of the dancing flames sat Sirius's head, long dark hair falling around his grinning face. **

"I am there!" exclaimed Sirius delightedly. "I'm probably answering Harry's letter this way, since I probably can't send him a letter safely."

**'I was starting to think you'd go to bed before everyone else had disappeared,' he said. 'I've been checking every hour.' **

**'You've been popping into the fire every hour?' Harry said, half-laughing. **

**'Just for a few seconds to check if the coast was clear.' **

"But what if someone saw you?" asked Lily in concern.

"I'd be careful," responded Sirius. "Besides, I'd be gone the moment someone saw me, if it happened."

**'But what if you'd been seen?' said Hermione anxiously. **

**'Well, I think a girl - first-year, by the look of her - might've got a glimpse of me earlier, but don't worry,' Sirius said hastily, as Hermione clapped a hand to her mouth, 'I was gone the moment she looked back at me and I'll bet she just thought I was an oddly-shaped log or something.' **

"I hope so," said Remus. "You're really taking a big risk, Sirius."

**'But, Sirius, this is taking an awful risk -' Hermione began. **

**'You sound like Molly,' said Sirius. 'This was the only way I could come up with of answering Harry's letter without resorting to a code - and codes are breakable.' **

**At the mention of Harry's letter, Hermione and Ron both turned to stare at him. **

**'You didn't say you'd written to Sirius!' said Hermione accusingly. **

**'I forgot,' said Harry, which was perfectly true; his meeting with Cho in the Owlery had driven everything before it out of his mind. 'Don't look at me like that, Hermione, there was no way anyone would have got secret information out of it, was there, Sirius?' **

"There wasn't," said Remus. "It was a very good letter."

**'No, it was very good,' said Sirius, smiling. 'Anyway, we'd better be quick, just in case we're disturbed - your scar.' **

**'What about -?' Ron began, but Hermione interrupted him. 'We'll tell you afterwards. Go on, Sirius.' **

**'Well, I know it can't be fun when it hurts, but we don't think it's anything to really worry about. It kept aching all last year, didn't it?' **

**'Yeah, and Dumbledore said it happened whenever Voldemort was feeling a powerful emotion,' said Harry, ignoring, as usual, Ron and Hermione's winces. 'So maybe he was just, I dunno, really angry or something the night I had that detention.' **

"That's probably what happened," said James.

**'Well, now he's back it's bound to hurt more often,' said Sirius. **

**'So you don't think it had anything to do with Umbridge touching me when I was in detention with her?' Harry asked. **

**'I doubt it,' said Sirius. 'I know her by reputation and I'm sure she's no Death Eater -' **

"But she's certainly evil and sadistic enough to be one," said Lily darkly, frowning at the book.

**'She's foul enough to be one,' said Harry darkly, and Ron and Hermione nodded vigorously in agreement. **

**'Yes, but the world isn't split into good people and Death Eaters,' said Sirius with a wry smile. 'I know she's a nasty piece of work, though - you should hear Remus talk about her.' **

"I know her?" asked Remus in surprise.

"Well, she did make that comment about dangerous half-breeds," pointed out James. "So you must have at least known about her."

**'Does Lupin know her?' asked Harry quickly, remembering Umbridge's comments about dangerous half-breeds during her first lesson. **

**'No,' said Sirius, 'but she drafted a bit of anti-werewolf legislation two years ago that makes it almost impossible for him to get a job.' **

"_What_!" exclaimed Sirius, James, Lily, and Peter indignantly.

"You're a perfectly nice person, Remus!" cried Lily. "It's totally unfair!"

**Harry remembered how much shabbier Lupin looked these days and his dislike of Umbridge deepened even further. **

**"What's she got against werewolves?" said Hermione angrily. **

"The trio's mad at Umbitch, too," said Sirius, looking happy for a second. His face clouded with anger again as he added to the Umbridge list, however.

**'Scared of them, I expect,' said Sirius, smiling at her indignation. 'Apparently she loathes part-humans; she campaigned to have merpeople rounded up and tagged last year, too. Imagine wasting your time and energy persecuting merpeople when there are little toerags like Kreacher on the loose.' **

The Marauders, minus Remus, laughed. "You really could be nicer to Kreacher," scolded Lily. "If you did, Kreacher might be nicer to you, Sirius."

**Ron laughed but Hermione looked upset. **

**'Sirius!' she said reproachfully. 'Honestly, if you made a bit of an effort with Kreacher, I'm sure he'd respond. After all, you are the only member of his family he's got left, and Professor Dumbledore said -' **

**'So, what are Umbridge's lessons like?' Sirius interrupted. 'Is she training you all to kill half-breeds?' **

"No, future me," said Sirius. "She's not letting them use magic. They just read the textbook."

**'No,' said Harry, ignoring Hermione's affronted look at being cut off in her defence of Kreacher. 'She's not letting us use magic at all!' **

**'All we do is read the stupid textbook,' said Ron. **

**'Ah, well, that figures,' said Sirius. 'Our information from inside the Ministry is that Fudge doesn't want you trained in combat.' **

"_Trained in combat_!" exclaimed James incredulously. "Does Fudge think they're forming a wizard army or something?"

_**Trained in combat**_**!' repeated Harry incredulously. 'What does he think we're doing here, forming some sort of wizard army?' **

**'That's exactly what he thinks you're doing,' said Sirius, 'or, rather, that's exactly what he's afraid Dumbledore's doing - forming his own private army, with which he will be able to take on the Ministry of Magic.' **

"That is the most stupid thing I've ever heard," declared Sirius. "Dumbledore would – would – would make out with a guy before he'd form an army and take on the Ministry."

**There was a pause at this, then Ron said, 'That's the most stupid thing I've ever heard, including all the stuff that Luna Lovegood comes out with.' **

**'So we're being prevented from learning Defence Against the Dark Arts because Fudge is scared we'll use spells against the Ministry?' said Hermione, looking furious. **

**'Yep,' said Sirius. 'Fudge thinks Dumbledore will stop at nothing to seize power. He's getting more paranoid about Dumbledore by the day. It's a matter of time before he has Dumbledore arrested on some trumped-up charge.' **

They all looked very angry. James, Lily, and Sirius in particular looked as if they wanted to blast several large objects into pieces and then murder someone.

**This reminded Harry of Percy's letter. **

**'D'you know if there's going to be anything about Dumbledore in the **_**Daily Prophet**_** tomorrow? Ron's brother Percy reckons there will be -' **

**'I don't know,' said Sirius, 'I haven't seen anyone from the Order all weekend, they're all busy. It's just been Kreacher and me here.' **

**There was a definite note of bitterness in Sirius's voice. **

**'So you haven't had any news about Hagrid, either?' **

**'Ah…' said Sirius, 'well, he was supposed to be back by now, no one's sure what's happened to him.' **

"Oh no!" gasped Lily. "Something terrible must have happened to Hagrid!" They all looked extremely worried.

**Then, seeing their stricken faces, he added quickly, 'But Dumbledore's not worried, so don't you three get yourselves in a state; I'm sure Hagrid's fine.' **

"But he was supposed to be back by now!" protested Remus. "Something has to have happened."

**'But if he was supposed to be back by now…' said Hermione in a small, anxious voice. **

**'Madame Maxime was with him, we've been in touch with her and she says they got separated on the journey home - but there's nothing to suggest he's hurt or - well, nothing to suggest he's not perfectly OK.' **

They exchanged looks, still not totally convinced.

**Unconvinced, Harry, Ron and Hermione exchanged worried looks. **

They looked at each other again. "It looks as if we feel the same way as the trio," said James.

**'Listen, don't go asking too many questions about Hagrid,' said Sirius hastily, 'it'll just draw even more attention to the fact that he's not back and I know Dumbledore doesn't want that. Hagrid's tough, he'll be OK.' And when they did not appear cheered by this, Sirius added, 'When's your next Hogsmeade weekend, anyway? I was thinking, we got away with the dog disguise at the station, didn't we? I thought I could -' **

"You will not!" snapped Lily. "It's too dangerous, Sirius!"

"Calm down," said Sirius. "The current me knows it's dangerous, so I'm sure the future me will see sense and not do it."

**'NO!' said Harry and Hermione together, very loudly. **

**'Sirius, didn't you see the **_**Daily Prophet**_**?' said Hermione anxiously. **

**'Oh, that,' said Sirius, grinning, 'they're always guessing where I am, they haven't really got a clue -' **

**'Yeah, but we think this time they have,' said Harry. 'Something Malfoy said on the train made us think he knew it was you, and his father was on the platform, Sirius - you know, Lucius Malfoy - so don't come up here, whatever you do. If Malfoy recognises you again -' **

**'All right, all right, I've got the point,' said Sirius. He looked most displeased. 'Just an idea, thought you might like to get together.' **

**'I would, I just don't want you chucked back in Azkaban!' said Harry. **

"Neither would the rest of us!" exclaimed Peter.

**There was a pause in which Sirius looked out of the fire at Harry, a crease between his sunken eyes. **

**'You're less like your father than I thought,' he said finally, a definite coolness in his voice. 'The risk would've been what made it fun for James.'**

"Actually, it wouldn't be that fun," said James, frowning. "I don't want you thrown back in Azkaban, either, Sirius. Or have you undergo the Dementor's Kiss. The risk is different from the risk of the stuff we normally do. Like the full moon romps with Moony."

**'Look -' **

**"Well, I'd better get going, I can hear Kreacher coming down the stairs," said Sirius, but Harry was sure he was lying. "I'll write to tell you a time I can make it back into the fire, then, shall I? If you can stand to risk it?" **

**There was a tiny **_**pop**_**, and the place where Sirius's head had been was flickering flame once more. **

"Well, the chapter didn't end that well after all," said Sirius in disgust. "I think the future me needs to see sense. Here, Remus, I'll read next. Maybe it'll turn out better than this one.'

"Okay," said Remus. He handed the book to Sirius, who turned to the next page and began reading.


	15. The Hogwarts High Inquisitor

**— CHAPTER FIFTEEN —**

**The Hogwarts High Inquisitor**

"Hogwarts High Inquisitor?" asked Peter. "What the heck does that mean?"

"We'll find out once we read," said James sourly. "It's bound to be nothing good."

**They had expected to have to comb Hermione's Daily Prophet carefully next morning to find the article Percy had mentioned in his letter. However, the departing delivery owl had barely cleared the top of the milk jug when Hermione let out a huge gasp and flattened the newspaper to reveal a large photograph of Dolores Umbridge, smiling widely and blinking slowly at them from beneath the headline.**

**MINISTRY SEEKS EDUCATIONAL REFORM**

**DOLORES UMBR1DGE APPOINTED** **FIRST EVER HIGH INQUISITOR**

"Umbridge is High Inquisitor?" demanded Remus. "What does that mean then? Is she more powerful than a professor?"

**"Umbridge 'High Inquisitor'?" said Harry darkly, his half-eaten piece of toast slipping from his fingers. "What does that mean?" Hermione read aloud:**

**"In a surprise move last night the Ministry of Magic passed new legislation giving itself an unprecedented level of control at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.**

"It looks like you're right, Remus," said Lily. "Umb!tch is going to have more power so interfere at Hogwarts."

**"'The Minister has been growing uneasy about goings-on at Hogwarts for some time,' said junior Assistant to the Minister, Percy Weasley. 'He is now responding to concerns voiced by anxious parents, who feel the school may be moving in a direction they do not approve of.'**

**"'This is not the first time in recent weeks that the Minister, Cornelius Fudge, has used new laws to effect improvements at the** **wizarding school. As recently as 30th August, Educational Decree Number Twenty-two was passed, to ensure that, in the event of the current Headmaster being unable to provide a candidate for a teaching post, the Ministry should select an appropriate person.**

"So that's how she became Defence Against Dark Arts teacher!" exclaimed Sirius angrily. He added to his Umbridge list and a new one he made for Fudge and the Ministry in general.

**'That's how Dolores Umbridge came to be appointed to the teaching staff at Hogwarts,' said Weasley last night. 'Dumbledore couldn't find anyone so the Minister put in Umbridge, and of course, she's been an immediate success —'"**

****"Excuse me?" demanded Lily indignantly. "She had not been an immediate success!" 

**"She's been a WHAT?" said Harry loudly. **

**"Wait, there's more," said Hermione grimly. ****"' –An immediate success, totally revolutionising the teaching of Defence Against the Dark Arts and providing the Minister with on-the-ground feedback about what's really happening at Hogwarts.'**

**"It is this last function that the Ministry has now formalised with the passing of Educational Decree Number Twenty-three, which creates the new position of Hogwarts High Inquisitor.**

**"'This is an exciting new phase in the Minister's plan to get to grips with what some are calling the falling standards at Hogwarts,' said Weasley. 'The Inquisitor will have powers to inspect her fellow educators and make sure that they are coming up to scratch. Professor Umbridge has been offered this position in addition to her own teaching post and we are delighted to say that she had accepted.'**

They all looked furious. "Hey, she shouldn't be able to inspect McGonagall and Flitwick and the like!" protested Peter.

**"The Ministry's new moves have received enthusiastic support from parents of students at Hogwarts.**

**'I feel much easier in my mind now that I know Dumbledore is being subjected to fair and objective evaluation,' said Mr. Lucius Malfoy, 41, speaking from his Wiltshire mansion last night. **

"Yeah right," muttered James. "It is in no way going to be fair and objective." Sirius glared at the book before adding to his Malfoy list.

**'Many of us with our children's best interests at heart have been concerned about some of Dumbledore's eccentric decisions in the last few years and are glad to know that the Ministry is keeping an eye on the situation.'**

**"Among those eccentric decisions are undoubtedly the controversial staff appointments previously described in this newspaper, which have included the employment of werewolf Remus Lupin, half-giant Rubeus Hagrid and delusional ex-Auror, 'Mad-Eye' Moody.**

"Hey, they've been excellent teachers!" snapped Sirius. "Well, okay, Moody was locked in his own trunk for ten months, but Moony's been a great tacher and Hagrid's nice and is doing his best."

**"Rumors abound, of course, that Albus Dumbledore, once Supreme Mugwump of the International Confederation of Wizards and Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot, is no longer up to the task of managing the prestigious school of Hogwarts.**

"Dumbledore is up to the task of managing Hogwarts!" cried Remus.

**"'I think the appointment of the Inquisitor is a first step towards ensuring that Hogwarts has a headmaster in whom we can all repose our confidence,' said a Ministry insider last night.**

**'Wizengamot elders Griselda Marchbanks and Tiberius Ogden have resigned in protest at the introduction of the post of Inquisitor to Hogwarts.**

**"'Hogwarts is a school, not an outpost of Cornelius Fudge's office,' said Madam Marchbanks. 'This is a further, disgusting attempt to discredit Albus Dumbledore.'**

"I'm glad she thinks that way, but she and Tiberius Ogden shouldn't have resigned," said Lily. "It's not going to change things, whereas if they still remained in the Wizengamot, they'd be able to help influence things for the better."

**'(For a full account of Madam Marchbanks's alleged links to subversive goblin groups, turn to page seventeen.) '**

**Hermione finished reading and looked across the table at the other two.**

**'So now we know how we ended up with Umbridge! Fudge passed this 'Educational Decree' and forced her on us! And now he's given her the power to inspect the other teachers!' Hermione was breathing fast and her eyes were very bright. 'I can't believe this. It's outrageous!'**

"We agree with you, Hermione," said Peter.

**'I know it is,' said Harry. He looked down at his right hand, clenched on the table-top, and saw the faint white outline of the words Umbridge had forced him to cut into his skin.**

**But a grin was unfurling on Ron's face.**

**'What?' said Harry and Hermione together, staring at him.**

**'Oh, I can't wait to see McGonagall inspected,' said Ron happily. 'Umbridge won't know what's hit her.' **

"True," said James, grinning. "That's one good thing about all this."

**'Well, come on,' said Hermione, jumping up, 'we'd better get going, if she's inspecting Binns's class we don't want to be late…'**

"I very much doubt Umb!tch will inspect Binns," commented Remus. "What's the point of inspecting a ghost?"

**But Professor Umbridge was not inspecting their History of Magic lesson, which was just as dull as the previous Monday, nor was she in Snape's dungeon when they arrived for double Potions, where Harry's moonstone essay was handed back to him with a large, spiky black 'D' scrawled in an upper corner.**

"Harry got a 'Dreadful' on his essay?" exclaimed Lily, incredulous. "Oh, why couldn't he have inherited my talent in Potions?"

"It's Snape that's grading it, so he might have purposely given Harry a lower grade," pointed out Sirius.

**'I have awarded you the grades you would have received if you presented this work in your OWL,' said Snape with a smirk, as he swept among them, passing back their homework. 'This should give you a realistic idea of what to expect in the examination.'**

**Snape reached the front of the class and turned on his heel to face them. ****"The general standard of this homework was abysmal. Most of you would have failed had this been your examination. I expect to see a great deal more effort for this weeks essay on the various varieties of venom antidotes, or I shall have to start handing out detentions to those dunces who get a 'D'."**

"Oh no," groaned James. "Is my son going to start getting detentions from Snape too? Please, Harry, do better on your next Potions essay."

**He smirked as Malfoy sniggered and said in a carrying whisper, "Some people got a 'D'? Ha!"**

**Harry realised that Hermione was looking sideways to see what grade he had received; he slid his moonstone essay back into his bag as quickly as possible, feeling that he would rather keep that information private.**

**Determined not to give Snape an excuse to fail him this lesson, Harry read and reread every line of instructions on the blackboard at least three times before acting on them. His Strengthening Solution was not precisely the clear turquoise shade of Hermione's but it was at least blue rather than pink, like Neville's, and he delivered a flask of it to Snape's desk at the end of the lesson with a feeling of mingled defiance and relief.**

"Well, Harry's Strengthening Solution should merit an 'Acceptable'," said Remus. "If Snape is fair about his grading, that is."

**'Well, that wasn't as bad as last week, was it?' said Hermione, as they climbed the steps out of the dungeon and made their way across the Entrance Hall towards lunch. 'And the homework didn't go too badly, either, did it?'**

"Maybe not for you, but for Harry and probably Ron, the homework didn't go well," said Peter.

**When neither Ron nor Harry answered, she pressed on, 'I mean, all right, I didn't expect the top grade, not if he's marking to OWL standard, but a pass is quite encouraging at this stage, wouldn't you say?'**

"Hermione probably deserved an 'E' on her essay, but Snape being Snape, would mark it as an 'A'," said Remus.

**Harry made a non-committal noise in his throat.**

**'Of course, a lot can happen between now and the exam, we've got plenty of time to improve, but the grades were getting now are a sort of baseline, aren't they? Something we can build on…'**

**They sat down together at the Gryffindor table.**

**"Obviously, I'd have been thrilled if I'd got an 'O' -"**

"That's enough, Hermione," muttered Sirius. "You don't need to go on and on about it."

**'Hermione,' said Ron sharply, 'if you want to know what grades we got, ask.'**

**'I don't - I didn't mean - well, if you want to tell me -'**

**"I got a 'P'," said Ron, ladling soup into his bowl. 'Happy?'**

"And now Harry's going to feel even worse, because Ron at least got a better mark," said James.

**'Well, that's nothing to be ashamed of,' said Fred, who had just arrived at the table with George and Lee Jordan and was sitting down on Harry's right. "Nothing wrong with a good healthy 'P'."**

"That's because you probably get them much of the time," commented Lily.

**'But," said Hermione, "doesn't 'P' stand for…"**

**"'Poor', yeah," said Lee Jordan. "Still, better than 'D', isn't it? 'Dreadful'?"**

**Harry felt his face grow warm and faked a small coughing fit over his roll. When he emerged from this he was sorry to find that Hermione was still in full flow about OWL grades.**

**"So top grade's 'O' for 'Outstanding'," she was saying, "and then there's 'A' -"**

"No, it's 'E', or 'Exceeds Expectations'," said Remus.

**"No, 'E'," George corrected her, "'E' for 'Exceeds Expectations'. And I've always thought Fred and I should've got 'E' in everything, because we exceeded expectations just by turning up for the exams."**

They all laughed at this.

**They all laughed except Hermione, who ploughed on, "So, after 'E' it's 'A' for 'Acceptable', and that's the last pass grade, isn't it?"**

**"Yep," said Fred, dunking an entire roll in his soup, transferring it to his mouth and swallowing it whole. "Then you get 'P' for 'Poor'-" Ron raised both his arms in mock celebration - "and 'D' for 'Dreadful'."**

"Don't forget 'T' for 'Troll'," said Peter.

"I bet Crabbe and Goyle will get T's on their OWLs," said Sirius. They all chuckled.

**"And then 'T'," George reminded him.**

**"'T'?" asked Hermione, looking appalled. "Even lower than a 'D'? What on earth does 'T' stand for?"**

**"'Troll'," said George promptly.**

**Harry laughed again, though he was not sure whether or not George was joking. He imagined trying to conceal from Hermione that he had received T's in all his OWLs and immediately resolved to work harder from now on.**

"Yes, you'd better," said Lily sternly. "You're not going to be able to become an Auror if you get T's, Harry. The only thing you would be able to do with grades like that is take Stan Shunpike's place on the Knight Bus."

"Or he could play Quidditch professionally," added James. "Harry's very good at it, and none of the teams really care what your grades are as long as you're good at Quidditch."

**"You lot had an inspected lesson yet?" Fred asked them.**

**'No,' said Hermione at once. 'Have you?'**

**'Just now, before lunch,' said George. 'Charms.'**

**'What was it like?' Harry and Hermione asked together.**

**Fred shrugged.**

**'Not that bad. Umbridge just lurked in the corner making notes on a clipboard. You know what Flitwick's like, he treated her like a guest, didn't seem to bother him at all. She didn't say much. Asked Alicia a couple of questions about what the classes are normally like, Alicia told her they were really good, that was it.'**

"Well, I doubt Flitwick will get marked down," said Remus. "He's a good teacher and everything."

**'I can't see old Flitwick getting marked down,' said George, 'he usually gets everyone through their exams all right.'**

**'Who've you got this afternoon?' Fred asked Harry.**

**"Trelawney -"**

**"A 'T' if ever I saw one."**

**" - and Umbridge herself.'**

**'Well, be a good boy and keep your temper with Umbridge today,' said George. 'Angelina'll do her nut if you miss any more Quidditch practices.'**

"Yeah," said Sirius, frowning. "Though if Umbitch wasn't teaching, Harry wouldn't have any reason to lose his temper."

**But Harry did not have to wait for Defence Against the Dark Arts to meet Professor Umbridge. **

"Don't tell me Umbridge is inspecting Trelawney?" groaned Peter, making a face.

**He was pulling out his dream diary in a seat at the very ****back of the shadowy Divination room when Ron elbowed him in the ribs and, looking round, he saw Professor Umbridge emerging through the trapdoor in the floor. The class, which had been talking cheerily fell silent at once. The abrupt fall in the noise level made Professor Trelawney, who had been wafting about handing out copies of _The Dream Oracle_, look round.**

**'Good afternoon, Professor Trelawney,' said Professor Umbridge with her wide smile. 'You received my note, I trust? Giving the time and date of your inspection?'**

**Professor Trelawney nodded curtly and, looking very disgruntled, turned her back on Professor Umbridge and continued to give out books.**

"Obviously Trelawney doesn't like the fact that she has to be inspected," said Lily. "Right now, I hate Umbitch so much that am in complete sympathy with Trelawney."

**Still smiling, Professor Umbridge grasped the back of the nearest armchair and pulled it to the front of the class so that it was a few inches behind Professor Trelawney's seat. She then sat down, took her clipboard from her flowery bag and looked up expectantly, waiting for the class to begin.**

**Professor Trelawney pulled her shawls tight about her with slightly trembling hands and surveyed the class through her hugely mgnifying lenses.**

**'We shall be continuing our study of prophetic dreams today,' she said in a brave attempt at her usual mystic tones, though her voice shook slightly. **

"Not only is she annoyed, but she's also a little afraid," said James, shaking his head. "I actually feel sorry for her."

**'Divide into pairs, please, and interpret each other's latest night-time visions with the aid of the _Oracle_.'**

**She made as though to sweep back to her seat, saw Professor Umbridge sitting right beside it, and immediately veered left towards Parvati and Lavender, who were already deep in discussion about Parvati's most recent dream.**

**Harry opened his copy of _The Dream Oracle_, watching Umbridge covertly. She was already making notes on her clipboard. After a few minutes she got to her feet and began to pace the room in Trelawney's wake, listening to her conversations with students and posing questions here and there. Harry bent his head hurriedly over his book.**

**'Think of a dream, quick,' he told Ron, 'in case the old toad comes our way.''**

**'I did it last time,' Ron protested, 'it's your turn, you tell me one.'**

**'Oh, I dunno…' said Harry desperately, who could not remember dreaming anything at all over the last few days. 'Lets say I dreamed I was… drowning Snape in my cauldron. Yeah, that'll do…'**

"It would," said Sirius, sounding amused. "Too bad we can't do that to him."

"Stop that!" snapped Lily. "Snape was perfectly nice and my friend until he accidentally called me the 'm' word and started getting involved in the wrong crowd. So just leave him alone!"

**Ron chortled as he opened his _Dream Oracle_.**

**'OK, we've got to add your age to the date you had the dream, the number of letters in the subject… would that be 'drowning' or 'cauldron' or 'Snape'?"**

"Any of them would do," muttered Peter.

**'It doesn't matter, pick any of them,' said Harry, chancing a glance behind him. Professor Umbridge was now standing at Professor Trelawney's shoulder making notes while the Divination teacher questioned Nevile about his dream diary.**

**'What night did you dream this again?' Ron said, immersed in calculations.**

**'I dunno, last night, whenever you like,' Harry told him, trying to listen to what Umbridge was saying to Professor Trelawney. They were only a table away from him and Ron now. Professor Umbridge was making another note on her clipboard and Professor Trelawney was looking extremely put out.**

**'Now,' said Umbridge, looking up at Trelawney, 'you've been in this post how long, exactly?'**

**Professor Trelawney scowled at her, arms crossed and shoulders hunched as though wishing to protect herself as much as possible from the indignity of the inspection. After a slight pause in which she seemed to decide that the question was not so offensive that she could reasonably ignore it, she said in a deeply resentful tone, 'Nearly sixteen years.'**

**'Quite a period,' said Professor Umbridge, making a note on her clipboard. 'So it was Professor Dumbledore who appointed you?'**

"Obviously, since there was no law then that said the Ministry could appoint teachers," said Lily in an annoyed tone of voice.

**'That's right,' said Professor Trelawney shortly.**

**Professor Umbridge made another note.**

**'And you are a great-great-granddaughter of the celebrated Seer Cassandra Trelawney?'**

**'Yes,' said Professor Trelawney, holding her head a little higher.**

**Another note on the clipboard.**

**'But I think - correct me if I am mistaken - that you are the first in your family since Cassandra to be possessed of Second Sight?'**

**'These things often skip - er - three generations,' said Professor Trelawney.**

"If it's great-great-granddaughter, wouldn't it be four generations?" asked Remus.

**Professor Umbridge's toadlike smile widened.**

**'Of course,' she said sweetly, making yet another note. 'Well, if you could just predict something for me, then?' And she looked up enquiringly, still smiling.**

"And since it's Trelawney, she won't be able to," said Sirius.

**Professor Trelawney stiffened as though unable to believe her ears. 'I don't understand you,' she said, clutching convulsively at the shawl around her scrawny neck.**

**'I'd like you to make a prediction for me,' said Professor Umbridge very clearly.**

**Harry and Ron were not the only people now watching and listening sneakily from behind their books. Most of the class were staring transfixed at Professor Trelawney as she drew herself up to her full height, her beads and bangles clinking.**

**'The Inner Eye does not See upon command!' she said in scandalised tones.**

"But that's not going to do you any good," said Peter, shaking his head.

**'I see,' said Professor Umbridge softly, making yet another note on her clipboard.**

**'I - but - but… wait!' said Professor Trelawney suddenly, in an attempt at her usual ethereal voice, though the mystical effect was ruined somewhat by the way it was shaking with anger. 'I… I think I do see something… something that concerns you… why, I sense something… something dark… some grave peril…'**

**Professor Trelawney pointed a shaking finger at Professor Umbridge who continued to smile blandly at her, eyebrows raised.**

**'I am afraid… I am afraid that you are in grave danger!' Professor Trelawney finished dramatically.**

"That's not going to impress Umbitch, though," said James.

**There was a pause. Professor Umbridge surveyed Professor Trelawney.**

**'Right,' she said softly, scribbling on her clipboard once more. 'Well, if that's really the best you can do…'**

**She turned away, leaving Professor Trelawney standing rooted to the spot, her chest heaving. Harry caught Ron's eye and knew that Ron was thinking exactly the same as he was: they both knew that Professor Trelawney was an old fraud, but on the other hand, they loathed Umbridge so much that they felt very much on Trelawney's side ****- **

"We feel the same way," said Sirius.

**until she swooped down on them a few seconds later, that is.**

**'Well?' she said, snapping her long fingers under Harry's nose, uncharacteristically brisk. 'Let me see the start you've made on your dream diary, please.'**

**And by the time she had interpreted Harry's dreams at the top of her voice (all of which, even the ones that involved eating porridge, apparently foretold a gruesome and early death), he was feeling much less sympathetic towards her. **

"For Merlin's sake!" exclaimed Lily. "Can't she ever predict something else?"

**All the while, Professor Umbridge stood a few feet away, making notes on that clipboard, and when the bell rang she descended the silver ladder first and was waiting for them all when they reached their Defence Agaist the Dark Arts lesson ten minutes later.**

**She was humming and smiling to herself when they entered the room. Harry and Ron told Hermione, who had been in Arithmancy, exactly what had happened in Divination while they all took out their copies of _Defensive Magical Theory_, but before Hermione could ask any questions Professor Umbridge had called them all to order and silence fell.**

**"Wands away," she instructed them all with a smile, and those people who had been hopeful enough to take them out, sadly returned them to their bags. "As we finished Chapter One last lesson, I would like you all to turn to page nineteen today and commence 'Chapter Two, Common Defensive Theories and their Derivation'. There will be no need to talk."**

They all glared at the book, then Sirius added to his list.

**Still smiling her wide, self-satisfied smile, she sat down at her desk. The class gave an audible sigh as it turned, as one, to page nineteen. Harry wondered dully whether there were enough chapters in the book to keep them reading ****through all this year's lessons and was on the point of checking the contents page when he noticed that Hermione had her hand in the air again.**

**Professor Umbridge had noticed, too, and what was more, she seemed to have worked out a strategy for just such an eventuality. Instead of trying to pretend she had not noticed Hermione she got to her feet and walked around the front row of desks until they were face to face, then she bent down and whispered, so that the rest of the class could not hear, 'What is it this time, Miss Granger?'**

**'I've already read Chapter Two,' said Hermione.**

**'Well then, proceed to Chapter Three.'**

"And Hermione will have read that as well," said Remus. "In fact, she'll have read the entire book already."

**'I've read that too. I've read the whole book.'**

**Professor Umbndge blinked but recovered her poise almost instantly.**

**'Well, then, you should be able to tell me what Slinkhard says about counter-jinxes in Chapter Fifteen.'**

**"He says that counter-jinxes are improperly named," said Hermione promptly. "He says 'counter-jinx' is just a name people give their jinxes when they want to make them sound more acceptable.'**

"Not necessarily," said Sirius. "Some are quite useful when used defensively."

**Professor Umbridge raised her eyebrows and Harry knew she was impressed, against her will.**

**'But I disagree,' Hermione continued.**

**Professor Umbridge's eyebrows rose a little higher and her gaze became distinctly colder.**

**'You disagree?' she repeated.**

**'Yes, I do,' said Hermione, who, unlike Umbridge, was not whispering, but speaking in a clear, carrying voice that had by now attracted the attention of the rest of the class. **

"She's intentionally doing this to get her classmates to see reason," commented Lily.

**'Mr. Slinkhard doesn't like jinxes, does he? But I think they can be very useful when they're used defensively.'**

**'Oh, you do, do you?' said Professor Umbridge, forgetting to whisper and straightening up. 'Well, I'm afraid it is Mr. Slinkhard's opinion, and not yours, that matters within this classroom, Miss Granger.'**

**'But -' Hermione began.**

**'That is enough,' said Professor Umbridge. She walked back to the front of the class and stood before them, all the jauntiness she had shown at the beginning of the lesson gone. 'Miss Granger, I am going to take five points from Gryffindor house.'**

"_What_?!" the Marauders and Lily exclaimed together. "She didn't do anything wrong!"

**There was an outbreak of muttering at this. **

**'What for?' said Harry angrily.**

**'Don't you get involved!' Hermione whispered urgently to him.**

**'For disrupting my class with pointless interruptions,' said Professor Umbridge smoothly. 'I am here to teach you using a Ministry-approved method that does not include inviting students to give their opinions on matters about which they understand very little. Your previous teachers in this subject may have allowed you more licence, but as none of them - with the possible exception of Professor Quirrell, who did at least appear to have restricted himself to age-appropriate subjects - would have passed a Ministry inspection -'**

"Well, if hadn't been for Moldywort possessing him, I'm sure Quirrell would have been a great teacher," said James sarcastically.

**'Yeah, Quirrell was a great teacher,' said Harry loudly, 'there was just that minor drawback of him having Lord Voldemort sticking out of the back of his head.'**

**This pronouncement was followed by one of the loudest silences Harry had ever heard. Then -**

**'I think another week's detentions would do you some good, Mr Potter,' said Umbridge sleekly.**

"Oh no," groaned Peter. "More detentions with that blood quill."

"And Angelina is going to be mad," added Remus.

**The cut on the back of Harry's hand had barely healed and, by the following morning, it was bleeding again. He did not complain during the evening's detention; he was determined not to give Umbridge the satisfaction; over and over again he wrote '_I must not tell lies'_ and not a sound escaped his lips, though the cut deepened with every letter.**

They all looked furiously at the book. Then muttering angrily, Sirius added to his list.

**The very worst part of this second week's worth of detentions was, just as George had predicted, Angelina's reaction. She cornered him just as he arrived at the Gryffindor table for breakfast on Tuesday and shouted so loudly that Professor McGonagall came sweeping down upon the pair of them from the staff table.**

**'Miss Johnson, how dare you make such a racket in the Great Hall! Five points from Gryffindor!'**

**'But Professor - he's gone and landed himself in detention again.'**

**'What's this, Potter?' said Professor McGonagall sharply, rounding on Harry. 'Detention? From whom?'**

**'From Professor Umbridge,' muttered Harry, not meeting Professor McGonagalls beady, square-framed eyes.**

**'Are you telling me,' she said, lowering her voice so that the group of curious Ravenclaws behind them could not hear, 'that after the warning I gave you last Monday you lost your temper in Professor Umbridge's class again?'**

**'Yes,' Harry muttered, speaking to the floor.**

**'Potter, you must get a grip on yourself! You are heading for serious trouble! Another five points from Gryffindor!'**

"_What_?" demanded James. "Yes, Harry shouldn't have lost his temper, but he doesn't need to be punished further with points off, McGonagall!"

**'But - what -? Professor, no!' Harry said, furious at this injustice, 'I'm already being punished by her, why do you have to take points as well?'**

**'Because detentions do not appear to have any effect on you whatsoever!' said Professor McGonagall tartly. 'No, not another word of complaint, Potter! And as for you, Miss Johnson, you will confine your shouting matches to the Quidditch pitch in future or risk losing the team captaincy!'**

**Professor McGonagall strode back towards the staff table. Angelina gave Harry a look of deepest disgust and stalked away, upon which he flung himself on to the bench beside Ron, fuming.**

**'She's taken points off Gryffindor because I'm having my hand sliced open every night! How is that fair, how?'**

"Well, if McGonagall knew what your detentions were, she wouldn't have taken points," said Remus reasonably.

**'I know, mate,' said Ron sympathetically, tipping bacon on to Harry's plate, 'she's bang out of order.'**

**Hermione, however, merely rustled the pages of her Daily Prophet and said nothing.**

**'You think McGonagall was right, do you?' said Harry angrily to the picture of Cornelius Fudge obscuring Hermione's face.**

**'I wish she hadn't taken points from you, but I think she's right to warn you not to lose your temper with Umbridge,' said Hermione's voice, while Fudge gesticulated forcefully from the front page, clearly giving some kind of speech.**

"Well, that's not going to endear Hermione to Harry at this moment," said Lily.

**Harry did not speak to Hermione all through Charms, but when they entered Transfiguration he forgot about being cross with her. Professor Umbridge and her clipboard were sitting in a corner and the sight of her drove the memory of breakfast right out of is head.**

**'Excellent,' whispered Ron, as they sat down in their usual seats. 'Let's see Umbridge get what she deserves.'**

They all grinned and looked expectantly at the book. James and Sirius rubbed their hands in anticipation.

**Professor McGonagall marched into the room without giving the slightest indication that she knew Professor Umbridge was there.**

**'That will do,' she said and silence fell immediately. "Mr. Finnigan, kindly come here and hand back the homework - Miss Brown, please take this box of mice - don't be silly, girl, they won't hurt you - and hand one to each student '-"**

**'Hem, hem,' said Professor Umbridge, employing the same silly little cough she had used to interrupt Dumbledore on the first night of term. Professor McGonagall ignored her. Seamus handed back Harry's essay; Harry took it without looking at him and saw, to his relief, that he had managed an 'A'.**

"That's good," said James. "At least Harry got a pass grade."

**'Right then, everyone, listen closely - Dean Thomas, if you do that to the mouse again I shall put you in detention - most of you have now successfully Vanished your snails and even those who were left with a certain amount of shell have got the gist of the spell. Today, we shall be -'**

**'Hem, hem,' said Professor Umbridge.**

**'Yes?' said Professor McGonagall, turning round, her eyebrows so close together they seemed to form one long, severe line.**

**'I was just wondering, Professor, whether you received my note telling you of the date and time of your inspec—'**

**'Obviously I received it, or I would have asked you what you are doing in my classroom,' said Professor McGonagall, turning her back firmly on Professor Umbridge. **

Lily and the Marauders exchanged looks of glee. "This is excellent!" exclaimed Peter.

**Many of the students exchanged looks of glee. 'As I was saying: today, we shall be practising the altogether more difficult Vanishment of mice. Now, the Vanishing Spell -'**

**'Hem, hem.'**

**'I wonder,' said Professor McGonagall in cold fury, turning on Professor Umbridge, 'how you expect to gain an idea of my usual teaching methods if you continue to interrupt me? You see, I do not generally permit people to talk when I am talking.'**

They all began laughing. "This makes up for the points McGonagall took from Harry!" said Sirius, grinning.

**Professor Umbridge looked as though she had just been slapped in the face. She did not speak, but straightened the parchment on her clipboard and began scribbling furiously.**

**Looking supremely unconcerned, Professor McGonagall addressed the class once more.**

**'As I was saying: the Vanishing Spell becomes more difficult with the complexity of the animal to be Vanished. The snail, as an invertebrate, does not present much of a challenge; the mouse, as a mammal, offers a much greater one. This is not, therefore, magic you can accomplish with your mind on your dinner. So - you know the incantation, let me see what you can do…'**

**'How she can lecture me about not losing my temper with Umbridge!' Harry muttered to Ron under his breath, but he was grinning - his anger with Professor McGonagall had quite evaporated.**

"Our anger has too," said Remus. "This is really great, seeing Umbitch getting what she deserves."

**Professor Umbridge did not follow Professor McGonagall around the class as she had followed Professor Trelawney; perhaps she realised Professor McGonagall would not permit it. She did, however, take many more notes while sitting in her corner, and when Professor McGonagall finally told them all to pack away, she rose with a grim expression on her face.**

**'Well, it's a start,' said Ron, holding up a long wriggling mouse-tail and dropping it back into the box Lavender was passing around.**

**As they filed out of the classroom, Harry saw Professor Umbridge approach the teacher's desk; he nudged Ron, who nudged Hermione in turn, and the three of them deliberately fell back to eavesdrop.**

"I wonder what McGonagall will say," said Peter.

**'How long have you been teaching at Hogwarts?' Professor Umbridge asked.**

**'Thirty-nine years this December,' said Professor McGonagall brusquely, snapping her bag shut.**

**Professor Umbridge made a note.**

**"Very well," she said, "you will receive the results of your inspection in ten days' time."**

**'I can hardly wait,' said Professor McGonagall, in a coldly indifferent voice, and she strode off towards the door. 'Hurry up, you three,' she added, sweeping Harry, Ron and Hermione before her.**

**Harry could not help giving her a faint smile and could have sworn he received one in return.**

"Wow," said James. "This is unexpected."

**He had thought that the next time he would see Umbridge would be in his detention that evening, but he was wrong. When they walked down the lawns towards the Forest for Care of Magical Creatures, they found her and her clipboard waiting for them beside Professor Grubbly-Plank.**

"Oh no, not another inspected lesson," groaned Sirius. Their good mood from reading about McGonagall's inspection vanished.

**'You do not usually take this class, is that correct?' Harry heard her ask as they arrived at the trestle table where the group of captive Bowtruckles were scrabbling around for woodlice like so many living twigs.**

**'Quite correct,' said Professor Grubbly-Plank, hands behind her back and bouncing on the balls of her feet. 'I am a substitute teacher standing in for Professor Hagrid.'**

**Harry exchanged uneasy looks with Ron and Hermione. Malfoy was whispering with Crabbe and Goyle; he would surely love this opportunity to tell tales on Hagrid to a member of the Ministry.**

**'Hmm,' said Professor Umbridge, dropping her voice, though Harry could still hear her quite clearly. 'I wonder - the Headmaster seems strangely reluctant to give me any information on the matter - can you tell me what is causing Professor Hagrid's very extended leave of absence?'**

"I doubt it," said Lily. "Dumbledore wouldn't have told Grubbly-Plank anything about it."

**Harry saw Malfoy look up eagerly and watch Umbridge and Grubbly-Plank closely.**

**"'Fraid I can't,' said Professor Grubbly-Plank breezily. 'Don't know anything more about it than you do. Got an owl from Dumbledore, would I like a couple of weeks' teaching work. I accepted. That's as much as I know. Well… shall I get started then?'**

**'Yes, please do,' said Professor Umbridge, scribbling on her clipboard.**

**Umbridge took a different tack in this class and wandered amongst the students, questioning them on magical creatures. Most people were able to answer well and Harry's spirits lifted somewhat; at least the class was not letting Hagrid down.**

"That's good," said Remus, smiling.

**'Overall,' said Professor Umbridge, returning to Professor Grubbly-Plank's side after a lengthy interrogation of Dean Thomas, 'how do you, as a temporary member of staff - an objective outsider, ****I suppose you might say — how do you find Hogwarts? Do you feel you receive enough support from the school management?'**

**'Oh, yes, Dumbledore's excellent,' said Professor Grubbly-Plank heartily. 'Yes, I'm very happy with the way things are run, very happy indeed.'**

**Looking politely incredulous, Umbridge made a tiny note on her clipboard and went on, 'And what are you planning to cover with this class this year - assuming, of course, that Professor Hagrid does not return?'**

**'Oh, I'll take them through the creatures that most often come up in OWL,' said Professor Grubbly-Plank. 'Not much left to do - they've studied unicorns and Nifflers, I thought we'd cover Porlocks and Kneazles, make sure they can recognise Crups and Knarls, you know…'**

**'Well, _you_ seem to know what you're doing, at any rate,' said Professor Umbridge, making a very obvious tick on her clipboard. **

"Hey, Hagrid knows what he's doing!" snapped Lily angrily.

**Harry did not like the** **emphasis she put on 'you' and liked it even less when she put her next question to Goyle. 'Now, I hear there have been injuries in this class?'**

**Goyle gave a stupid grin. Malfoy hastened to answer the question.**

**'That was me,' he said. 'I was slashed by a Hippogriff.'**

"Only because the idiot wasn't paying attention to Hagrid and insulted Buckbeak!" retorted James.

**'A Hippogriff?' said Professor Umbridge, now scribbling frantically.**

**'Only because he was too stupid to listen to what Hagrid told him to do,' said Harry angrily.**

**Both Ron and Hermione groaned. Professor Umbridge turned her head slowly in Harry's direction.**

**'Another night's detention, I think,' she said softly. 'Well, thank you very much, Professor Grubbly-Plank, I think that's all I need here. You will be receiving the results of your inspection within ten days.'**

**'Jolly good,' said Professor Grubbly-Plank, and Professor Umbridge set off back across the lawn to the castle.**

**It was nearly midnight when Harry left Umbridge's office that night, his hand now bleeding so severely that it was staining the scarf he had wrapped around it. **

"_What_!" they all exclaimed.

"Harry, go tell McGonagall about it!" cried Lily.

"But if he does, I bet Umbridge would get the Ministry to pass a decree that any teacher that complains about her would get sacked," pointed out Remus. "So it wouldn't do much good. Besides, Umbridge would just lie her way out of it."

**He expected the common room to be empty when he returned, but Ron and Hermione had sat up waiting for him. He was pleased to see them, especially as Hermione was disposed to be sympathetic rather than critical.**

**'Here,' she said anxiously, pushing a small bowl of yellow liquid towards him, 'soak your hand in that, it's a solution of strained and pickled Murtlap tentacles, it should help.'**

"That's really nice of her," said Peter.

**Harry placed his bleeding, aching hand into the bowl and experienced a wonderful feeling of relief. Crookshanks curled around his legs, purring loudly, then leapt into his lap and settled down.**

**'Thanks,' he said gratefully, scratching behind Crookshanks's ears with his left hand.**

**'I still reckon you should complain about this,' said Ron in a low voice.**

**'No,' said Harry flatly.**

**'McGonagall would go nuts if she knew —'**

**'Yeah, she probably would,' said Harry dully. 'And how long do you reckon it'd take Umbridge to pass another decree saying anyone who complains about the High Inquisitor gets sacked immediately?'**

"Exactly!" exclaimed Remus. "Harry's thinking along the same lines as me!"

**Ron opened his mouth to retort but nothing came out and, after a moment, he closed it again, defeated.**

**'She's an awful woman,' said Hermione in a small voice. 'Awful. You know, I was just saying to Ron when you came in… we've got to do something about her.'**

**'I suggested poison,' said Ron grimly.**

**'No… I mean, something about what a dreadful teacher she is, and how we're not going to learn any Defence from her at all,' said Hermione.**

"What are you going to do about that?" asked Sirius. "Check out book on Defence from the library and learn the spells on your own?"

**'Well, what can we do about that?' said Ron, yawning. "'S too late, isn't it? She's got the job, she's here to stay. Fudge'll make sure of that."**

**'Well,' said Hermione tentatively. 'You know, I was thinking today…' she shot a slightly nervous look at Harry and then plunged on, 'I was thinking that - maybe the time's come when we should just - just do it ourselves.'**

**'Do what ourselves?' said Harry suspiciously, still floating his hand in the essence of Murtlap tentacles.**

**'Well - learn Defence Against the Dark Arts ourselves,' said Hermione.**

**'Come off it,' groaned Ron. 'You want us to do extra work? D'you realise Harry and I are behind on homework again and it's only the second week?'**

**'But this is much more important than homework!' said Hermione.**

They all stared at the book in shock. "I never thought Hermione would ever say that," said Peter.

**Harry and Ron goggled at her.**

**'I didn't think there was anything in the universe more important than homework!' said Ron.**

**'Don't be silly, of course there is,' said Hermione, and Harry saw, with an ominous feeling, that her face was suddenly alight with the kind of fervour that SPEW usually inspired in her. 'It's about preparing ourselves, like Harry said in Umbridge's first lesson, for what's waiting for us out there. It's about making sure we really can defend ourselves. If we don't learn anything for a whole year -'**

**'We can't do much by ourselves,' said Ron in a defeated voice. 'I mean, all right, we can go and look jinxes up in the library and try and practise them, I suppose -'**

**'No, I agree, we've gone past the stage where we can just learn things out of books,' said Hermione. 'We need a teacher, a proper one, who can show us how to use the spells and correct us if we're going wrong.'**

"Who's going to teach you guys?" asked James. "Moony?"

**'If you're talking about Lupin…' Harry began.**

**'No, no, I'm not talking about Lupin,' said Hermione. 'He's too busy with the Order and, anyway, the most we could see him is during Hogsmeade weekends and that's not nearly often enough.'**

**'Who, then?' said Harry, frowning at her.**

**Hermione heaved a very deep sigh.**

**'Isn't it obvious?' she said. 'I'm talking about you, Harry.'**

They stared at the book for a minute, then exchanged surprised looks. Finally Remus broke the silence. "Hermione wants Harry to teach them Defence?"

"Well, it is what he's best at, along with flying," said Lily.

**There was a moment's silence. A light night breeze rattled the windowpanes behind Ron, and the fire guttered.**

**'About me what?' said Harry.**

**'I'm talking about you teaching us Defence Against the Dark Arts.'**

**Harry stared at her. Then he turned to Ron, ready to exchange the exasperated looks they sometimes shared when Hermione elaborated on far-fetched schemes like SPEW. To Harry's consternation, however, Ron did not look exasperated.**

**He was frowning slightly, apparently thinking. Then he said, 'That's an idea.'**

**'What's an idea?' said Harry.**

"You teaching Defence, Harry," said James. "It's your best subject, and what with all you've done, you'd be able to teach it."

**'You,' said Ron. 'Teaching us to do it.'**

**'But…'**

**Harry was grinning now, sure the pair of them were pulling his leg.**

**'But I'm not a teacher, I can't -'**

**'Harry, you're the best in the year at Defence Against the Dark Arts,' said Hermione.**

**'Me?' said Harry, now grinning more broadly than ever. 'No I'm not, you've beaten me in every test -'**

**'Actually, I haven't,' said Hermione coolly. 'You beat me in our third year - the only year we both sat the test and had a teacher who actually knew the subject. But I'm not talking about test results, Harry. Think what you've done -'**

**'How d'you mean?'**

"Use your brain, Harry!" exclaimed Lily. "You saved the Philosopher's Stone, killed a basilisk, fought a lot of Dementors, participated in the Triwizard Tournament, and dealt with Voldemort's return and escaped!"

**'You know what, I'm not sure I want someone this stupid teaching me,' Ron said to Hermione, smirking slightly. He turned to Harry.**

**'Let's think,' he said, pulling a face like Goyle concentrating. 'Uh… first year - you saved the Philosopher's Stone from You-Know-Who.'**

**'But that was luck,' said Harry, 'it wasn't skill -'**

"So what?" demanded Sirius. "You still faced Moldywart and survived. Not many people can say that."

**'Second year,' Ron interrupted, 'you killed the Basilisk and destroyed Riddle.'**

**'Yeah, but if Fawkes hadn't turned up, I -'**

**'Third year,' said Ron, louder still, 'you fought off about a hundred Dementors at once -'**

**'You know that was a fluke, if the Time-Turner hadn't -'**

"So?" asked Remus. "Most third years can't produce a corporeal Patronus."

**'Last year,' Ron said, almost shouting now, 'you fought off You-Know-Who again -'**

**'Listen to me!' said Harry, almost angrily, because Ron and Hermione were both smirking now. 'Just listen to me, all right? It sounds great when you say it like that, but all that stuff was luck - I didn't know what I was doing half the time, I didn't plan any of it, I just did whatever I could think of, and I nearly always had help -'**

"Yes, but you still had to face Moldywart by yourself!" snapped Lily. "Nobody helped you then. The help was only along the way to facing Moldywart. Besides, you know what it's like to be facing him. Your friends don't!"

**Ron and Hermione were still smirking and Harry felt his temper rise; he wasn't even sure why he was feeling so angry.**

**'Don't sit there grinning like you know better than I do, I was there, wasn't I?' he said heatedly. 'I know what went on, all right? And I didn't get through any of that because I was brilliant at Defence Against the Dark Arts, I got through it all because - because help came at the right time, or because I guessed right - but I just blundered through it all, I didn't have a clue what I was doing - STOP LAUGHING!'**

**The bowl of Murtlap essence fell to the floor and smashed. He became aware that he was on his feet, though he couldn't remember standing up. Crookshanks streaked away under a sofa. Ron and Hermione's smiles had vanished.**

**'You don't know what it's like! You - neither of you - you've never had to face him, have you? You think it's just memorising a bunch of spells and throwing them at him, like you're in class or something? The whole time you're sure you know there's nothing between you and dying except your own - your own brain or guts or whatever - like you can think straight when you know you're about a nanosecond from being murdered, or tortured, or watching your friends die -they've never taught us that in their classes, what it's like to deal with things like that - and you two sit there acting like I'm a clever little boy to be standing here, alive, like Diggory was stupid, like he messed up — you just don't get it, that could just as easily have been me, it would have been if Voldemort hadn't needed me -'**

**'We weren't saying anything like that, mate,' said Ron, looking aghast. 'We weren't having a go at Diggory, we didn't - you've got the wrong end of the -'**

**He looked helplessly at Hermione, whose face was stricken.**

**'Harry,' she said timidly, 'don't you see? This… this is exactly why we need you… we need to know what it's r-really like… facing him… facing V-Voldemort.'**

"Did Hermione actually say the same?" asked Peter, shocked.

"Yes," said Sirius, rereading the sentence. "She did say the name. And she's right. They need to know what it's like facing Voldemort and Harry's the only one that can teach them that."

**It was the first time she had ever said Voldemort's name and it was this, more than anything else, that calmed Harry. Still breathing hard, he sank back into his chair, becoming aware as he did so that his hand was throbbing horribly again. He wished he had not smashed the bowl of Murtlap essence.**

**'Well… think about it,' said Hermione quietly. 'Please?'**

**Harry could not think of anything to say. He was feeling ashamed of his outburst already. **

"You should be, Harry," said Lily in a scolding tone of voice.

**He nodded, hardly aware of what he was agreeing to.**

**Hermione stood up.**

**'Well, I'm off to bed,' she said, in a voice that was clearly as natural as she could make it. 'Erm… night.'**

**Ron had got to his feet, too.**

**'Coming?' he said awkwardly to Harry.**

**'Yeah,' said Harry. 'In… in a minute. I'll just clear this up.'**

**He indicated the smashed bowl on the floor. Ron nodded and left.**

**'Reparo,' Harry muttered, pointing his wand at the broken pieces of china. They flew back together, good as new, but there was no returning the Murtlap essence to the bowl.**

"There is a spell that allows you to do that," said Peter.

"But Harry probably doesn't know it," pointed out Remus."Or he would have done it."

**He was suddenly so tired he was tempted to sink back into his armchair and sleep there, but instead he forced himself to his feet and followed Ron upstairs. His restless night was punctuated once more by dreams of long corridors and locked doors and he awoke next day with his scar pickling again.**

"Not good," said Sirius, shaking his head. "This chapter wasn't very pleasant at all, except for McGonagall's handling of Umbitch during the inspection. Who wants to read next?"

"I will," offered Lily. She took the book from Sirius.


	16. In the Hog's Head

Author's Note: As an early Christmas present, I'm uploading two chapters today. Both are dedicated to all the wonderful people who have read and/or reviewed this fic and my previous ones in this series. I may have Chapter Seventeen up before Christmas, but otherwise, don't expect any updates until after the holidays. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone.

— **CHAPTER SIXTEEN — **

**In the Hog's Head**

"What would the trio be doing in the Hog's Head?" asked James. "It's not exactly a respectable pub. The Three Broomsticks is so much better."

**Hermione made no mention of Harry giving Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons for two whole weeks after her original suggestion. Harry's detentions with Umbridge were finally over (he doubted whether the words now etched into the back of his hand would ever fade entirely); Ron had had four more Quidditch practices and not been shouted at during the last two; and all three of them had managed to Vanish their mice in Transfiguration (Hermione had actually progressed to Vanishing kittens), before the subject was broached again, on a wild, blustery evening at the end of September, when the three of them were sitting in the library, looking up potion ingredients for Snape.**

'**I was wondering,' Hermione said suddenly, 'whether you'd thought any more about Defence Against the Dark Arts, Harry.' **

"I don't think anyone could forget with that b!tch teaching," muttered Sirius darkly.

'**Course I have,' said Harry grumpily, 'can't forget it, can we, with that hag teaching us – ' **

**'I meant the idea Ron and I had -' Ron cast her an alarmed, threatening kind of look. She frowned at him, '- Oh, all right, the idea I had, then - about you teaching us.'**

**Harry did not answer at once. He pretended to be perusing a page of **_**Asiatic Anti**_**-****_Venom_s****, because he did not want to say what was in his mind. **

"I guess a part of him does want to teach Defence," commented Lily.

**He had given the matter a great deal of thought over the past fortnight. Sometimes it seemed an insane idea, just as it had on the night Hermione had proposed it, but at others, he had found himself thinking about the spells that had served him best in his various encounters with Dark creatures and Death Eaters – found himself, in fact, subconsciously planning lessons… **

"Well, you would be a decent teacher," remarked Peter. "As good as Remus."

**'Well,' he said slowly, when he could no longer p****retend to find _Asiatic _****_Anti-Venoms_****interesting, 'yeah, I – I've thought about it a bit.' **

'**And?' said Hermione eagerly. **

'**I dunno,' said Harry, playing for time. He looked up at Ron. **

'**I thought it was a good idea from the start,' said Ron, who seemed keener to join in this conversation now that he was sure Harry was not going to start shouting again. **

**Harry shifted uncomfortably in his chair. **

"**You did listen to what I said about a load of it being luck, didn't you?" **

"But it's not completely luck," said Remus. "You're still very good in Defence, Harry."

**'Yes, Harry,' said Hermione gently, 'but all the same, there's no point pretending that you're not good at Defence Against the Dark Arts, because you are. You were the only person last year who could t****hrow off the Imperius Curse completely, you can produce a Patronus, you can do all sorts of stuff that full-grown wizards can't, Viktor always said -' **

**Ron looked round at her so fast he appeared to crick his neck. Rubbing it, he said, "Yeah? What did Vicky say?" **

**"Ho ho," said Hermione in a bored voice. "He said Harry knew how to do stuff even he didn't, and he was in the final year at Durmstrang." **

They all looked impressed. "Harry really is very good in Defence with that kind of praise," remarked Peter. "He'd make a good Auror."

**Ron was looking at Hermione suspiciously. **

'**You're not still in contact with him, are you?'**

'**So what if I am?' said Hermione coolly, though her face was a little pink. 'I can have a pen-pal if I -' **

"**He didn't only want to be your pen-pal," said Ron accusingly. **

"Maybe, but Hermione doesn't seem to want to be more than that," said Lily. "In fact, from what we've read so far, it seems fairly obvious that they'll end up together."

"Where did you get that idea?" asked Sirius. "Okay, I can see evidence of Ron having feeling for Hermione, but not the other way around."

"Well, Hermione's not going to end up with Harry, because he only sees Hermione as a friend," responded Lily. "And the only boys Hermione knows well besides Harry and Ron are some of her yearmates and Fred and George, and she's not interested in them."

**Hermione shook her head exasperatedly and, ignoring Ron, who was continuing to watch her, said to Harry, "Well, what do you think? Will you teach us?" **

**"Just you and Ron, yeah?"**

**"Well," said Hermione, looking a mite anxious again. "Well… now, don't fly off the handle again, Harry, please… but I really think you ought to teach anyone who wants to learn. I mean, we're talking about defending ourselves against V- Voldemort. Oh, don't be pathetic, Ron. It doesn't seem fair if we don't offer the chance to other people." **

**Harry considered this for a moment, then said, "Yeah, but I doubt anyone except you two would want to be taught by me. I'm a nutter, remember?" **

"Well, Ernie Macmillan, Luna Lovegood, Neville, Cho, Dean, and the twins don't think you're a nutter," said Remus. "I'm sure they wouldn't mind being taught by you."

"**Well, I think you might be surprised how many people would ****be interested in hearing what you've got to say," said Hermione seriously. "Look," she leaned towards him - Ron, who was still watching her with a frown on his face, leaned forwards to listen too - "you know the first weekend in October's a Hogsmeade weekend? How would it be if we tell anyone who's interested to meet us in the village and we can talk it over?"**

'**Why do we have to do it outside school?' said Ron. **

"Because Umb!tch wouldn't like what you're planning to do at all," said James.

**"Because," said Hermione, returning to the diagram of the Chinese Chomping Cabbage she was copying, "I don't think Umbridge would be very happy if she found out what we were up to."**

**Harry had been looking forward to the weekend trip into Hogsmeade, but there was one thing worrying him. Sirius had maintained a stony silence since he had appeared in the fire at the beginning of September; Harry knew they had made him angry by saying they didn't want him to come – but he still worried from time to time that Sirius might throw caution to the winds and turn up anyway. **

"I don't think I would," said Sirius. "I take risks, but not when it's going to involve my getting the Dementor's Kiss or being sent back to Azkaban."

**What were they going to do if the great black dog came bounding up the street towards them in Hogsmeade, perhaps under the nose of Draco Malfoy? **

"**Well, you can't blame him for wanting to get out and about," said Ron, when Harry discussed his fears with him and Hermione. "I mean, he's been on the run for over two years, hasn't he, and I know that can't have been a laugh, but at least he was free, wasn't he? And now he's just shut up all the time with that ghastly elf." **

"Good point," said Lily. "That would explain why your future self is like that, Sirius."

**Hermione scowled at Ron, but otherwise ignored the slight on Kreacher. **

'**The trouble is,' she said to Harry, 'until V-Voldemort – oh, for heaven's sake, Ron – comes out into the open, and Sirius is going to have to stay hidden, isn't he? I mean, the stupid Ministry isn't going to realize Sirius is innocent until they accept that Dumbledore's been telling the truth about him all along. And once the fools start catching real Death Eaters again, it'll be obvious Sirius isn't one… I mean, he hasn't got the Mark, for one thing.' **

"Yeah," muttered James darkly. "Why didn't they check for the Mark when Sirius was first arrested? Idiot Crouch."

'**I don't reckon he'd be stupid enough to turn up,' said Ron bracingly. 'Dumbledore'd go mad if he did and Sirius listens to Dumbledore even if he doesn't like what he hears.' **

**When Harry continued to look worried, Hermione said, 'Listen, Ron and I have been sounding out people who we thought might want to learn some proper Defence Against the Dark Arts, and there are a couple who seem interested. We've told them to meet us in Hogsmeade.' **

**'Right,' said Harry vaguely, his mind still on Sirius. **

'**Don't worry, Harry,' Hermione said quietly. 'You've got enough on your plate without Sirius, too.'**

"Yeah, Harry," said Sirius. "Maybe I should wish for my future self to appear so I can talk to him."

"Don't do that!" cried Remus, alarmed. "Your future self will freak out and could attack your current self. Besides, the future in these books isn't going to come true now. We've changed it with Peter making that Unbreakable Vow."

**She was quite right; of course, he was barely keeping up with his homework, though he was doing much better now that he was no longer spending every evening in detention with Umbridge. Ron was even further behind with his work than Harry, because while they both had Quidditch practice twice a week, Ron also had his prefect duties. However, Hermione, who was taking more subjects than either of them, had not only finished all her homework but was also finding time to knit more elf clothes. Harry had to admit that she was getting better; it was now almost always possible to distinguish between the hats and the socks. **

"That's … good," said Lily slowly, an eyebrow raised.

**The morning of the Hogsmeade visit dawned bright but windy. After breakfast they queued up in front of Filch, who matched their names to the long list of students who had permission from their parents or guardian to visit the village. With a slight pang, Harry remembered that if it hadn't been for Sirius, he would not have been going at all. **

"Don't worry about that, Harry," said Sirius.

**When Harry reached Filch, the caretaker gave a great sniff as though trying to detect a whiff of something from Harry. Then he gave a curt nod that set his jowls aquiver again and Harry walked on, out on to the stone steps and the cold, sunlit day. **

**'Er – why was Filch sniffing you?' asked Ron, as he, Harry and Hermione set off at a brisk pace down the wide drive to the gates. **

'**I suppose he was checking for the smell of Dungbombs,' said Harry with a small laugh. **

"It's not a laughing matter," said Lily sternly. "Filch was no doubt trying to read your letter, probably on Umb!tch's orders."

'**I forgot to tell you…' **

**And he recounted the story of sending his letter to Sirius and Filch bursting in seconds later, demanding to see the letter. To his slight surprise, Hermione found this story highly interesting, much more, indeed, than he did himself. **

"**He said he was tipped off you were ordering Dungbombs? But who tipped him off?"**

'**I dunno,' said Harry, shrugging. 'Maybe Malfoy, he'd think it was a laugh.' **

"Well, I don't see Malfoy getting up early in the morning to do that," said Sirius.

**They walked between the tall stone pillars topped with winged boars and turned left on to the road into the village, the wind whipping their hair into their eyes. **

**'Malfoy?' said Hermione, sceptically. 'Well… yes… maybe…' **

**And she remained deep in thought all the way into the outskirts of Hogsmeade. **

'**Where are we going, anyway?' Harry asked. 'The Three Broomsticks?' **

"Based on the chapter title, answer would be no," said Peter. "It's the Hog's Head."

**'Oh – no,' said Hermione, coming out of her reverie, 'no, it's always packed and really noisy. I've told the others to meet us in the Hog's Head, that other pub, you know the one; it's not on the main road. I think it's a bit… you know… ****dodgy****… but students don't normally go in there, so I don't think we'll be overheard.' **

"But with less people, there's more chance you'll be heard by someone because it's so quiet," said Lily in a worried tone of voice. "A packed and noisy place means that there's less chance of being overheard. I think the Three Broomsticks would be better."

"But –" began James. Then he paused to think it over. "Okay, you have a point, Lily."

**They walked down the main street past Zonko's Wizarding Joke Shop, where they were not surprised to see Fred, George and Lee Jordan, past the post office, from which owls issued at regular intervals, and turned up a side-street at the top of which stood a small inn. A battered wooden sign hung from a rusty bracket over the door, with a picture on it of a wild boar's severed head, leaking blood on to the white cloth around it. The sign creaked in the wind as they approached. All three of them hesitated outside the door. **

"Well, it's not exactly a place most people care to visit," said Sirius. "We went there once, and never went there again. We think the bartender's Dumbledore's brother, though. He looks sort of like Dumbledore, and the place smelled of goats."

"What does the Hog's Head smelling of goats have to do with anything?" asked Lily.

"Aberforth Dumbledore was condemned for practicing improper charms on a goat," replied Remus. "Dumbledore mentioned it in the last book when he was talking Hagrid into coming back and teach, remember?"

"**Well, come on," said Hermione, slightly nervously. Harry led the way inside. **

**It was not at all like the Three Broomsticks, whose large bar gave an impression of gleaming warmth and cleanliness. The Hog's Head bar comprised one small, dingy and very dirty room that smelled strongly of something that might have been goats. The bay windows were so encrusted with grime that very little daylight could permeate the room, which was lit instead with the stubs of candles sitting on rough wooden tables. The floor seemed at first glance to be compressed earth, though as Harry stepped on to it he realized that there was stone beneath what seemed to be the accumulated filth of centuries. **

"No wonder the Hog's Head is considered dodgy," remarked Lily. "If the bartender's probably Aberforth Dumbledore, why is he so different from his brother?"

"Siblings aren't alike," reminded Sirius. "I'm different from Regulus, and you're different from Petunia."

Harry remembered Hagrid mentioning this pub in his first year: 'Yeh get a lot o' funny folk in the Hogs Head,' he had said, explaining how he had won a dragon's egg from a hooded stranger there. At the time Harry had wondered why Hagrid had not found it odd that the stranger kept his face hidden throughout their encounter; now he saw that keeping your face hidden was something of a fashion in the Hog's Head. There was a man at the bar whose whole head was wrapped in dirty grey bandages, though he was still managing to gulp endless glasses of some smoking, fiery substance through a slit over his mouth; two figures shrouded in hoods sat at a table in one of the windows;

"They're not Dementors, are they?" asked Peter nervously.

"If they were, what would they be doing in a pub?" responded Remus. "And they'd drive out all the customers. Please use your mind, Peter."

**Harry might have thought them Dementors if they had not been talking in strong Yorkshire accents, and in a shadowy corner beside the fireplace sat a witch with a thick, black veil that fell to her toes. They could just see the tip of her nose because it caused the veil to protrude slightly. **

'**I don't know about this, Hermione,' Harry muttered, as they crossed to the bar. He was looking particularly at the heavily veiled witch. 'Has it occurred to you Umbridge might be under that?' **

**Hermione cast an appraising eye over the veiled figure. 'Umbridge is shorter than that woman,' she said quietly. 'And anyway, even if Umbridge does come in here there's nothing she can do to stop us, Harry, because I've double- and triple-checked the school rules. We're not out of bounds; I specifically asked Professor Flitwick whether students were allowed to come in the Hog's Head, and he said yes, but he advised me strongly to bring our own glasses. And I've looked up everything I can think of about study groups and homework groups and they're definitely allowed. I just don't think it's a good idea if we parade what were doing.' **

"Yeah, because what you're planning to do isn't exactly a study group," said James dryly.

**'No,' said Harry dryly, 'especially as it's not exactly a homework group you're planning, is it?'**

**The barman sidled towards them out of a back room. He was a grumpy-looking old man with a great deal of long grey hair and beard. He was tall and thin and looked vaguely familiar to Harry. **

"He looked vaguely familiar to us, too, and after awhile, we guessed that he must be Professor Dumbledore's brother," remarked Sirius.

**'What?' he grunted. **

'**Three Butter beers, please,' said Hermione. The man reached beneath the counter and pulled up three very dusty, very dirty bottles, which he slammed on the bar. 'Six Sickles,' he said. **

'**I'll get them,' said Harry quickly, passing over the silver. The barman's eyes travelled over Harry, resting for a fraction of a second on his scar. Then he turned away and deposited Harry's money in an ancient wooden till whose drawer slid open automatically to receive it. Harry, Ron and Hermione retreated to the furthest table from the bar and sat down, looking around. The man in the dirty grey bandages rapped the counter with his knuckles and received another smoking drink from the barman. **

'**You know what?' Ron murmured, looking over at the bar with enthusiasm. "We could order anything we liked in here. I bet that bloke would sell us anything, he wouldn't care. I've always wanted to try Firewhisky –' **

"Ron, you're a prefect," said Lily severely. "You can't be drinking when underage."

'**You – are – a – **_**prefect**_**,' snarled Hermione. **

'**Oh,' said Ron, the smile fading from his face. 'Yeah…' **

**'So, who did you say is supposed to be meeting us?' Harry asked, wrenching open the rusty top of his Butterbeer and taking a swig. **

"**Just a couple of people," Hermione repeated, checking her watch and anxiously towards the door. "I told them to be here about now and I'm sure they all know where it is - oh, look, this might be them now.' A thick band of dusty sunlight split the room in two for a moment and then vanished, blocked by the incoming rush of a crowd people. First came Neville with Dean and Lavender, who were closely followed by Parvati and Padma Patil with (Harry's stomach did a back-flip) Cho and one of her usually giggling girlfriends, then (on her own and looking so dreamy she might have walked in by accident) Luna Lovegood; then Katie Bell, Alicia Spinnet and Angelina Johnson, Colin and Dennis Creevey, Ernie Macmillan, Justin Finch-Fletchley, Hannah Abbott, a Hufflepuff girl with a long plait down her back whose name Harry did not know; three Ravenclaw boys he was pretty sure were called Anthony Goldstein, Michael Corner and Terry Boot, Ginny, closely followed by a tall skinny blond boy with an upturned nose whom Harry recognised vaguely as being a member of the Hufflepuff Quidditch team and, bringing up the rear, Fred and George Weasley with their friend Lee Jordan, all three of whom were carrying large paper bags crammed with Zonko's merchandise.**

"_That's_ what Hermione means by a couple of people'?" demanded James.

"Well, the list isn't bad," said Remus. "The Gryffindor chasers apparently believe Harry about Voldemort's return. We know Ernie does, and he would have talked with his friends and got them to see his way of thinking. Hermione would have talked Lavender and Parvati around, and Padma and Anthony are the Ravenclaw prefects, so Hermione would have talked to them too. And Cho would have brought a friend along."

"But we don't know anything about the other two Ravenclaw boys, the Hufflepuff girl that Harry doesn't know, or that boy that's on the Hufflepuff Quidditch team," said Lily. "Though maybe Terry Boot and Michael Corner are friends with Anthony, and that's why they came. And the girl could be friends with Hannah Abbott."

'**A couple of people?' said Harry hoarsely to Hermione. 'A couple_ of people_?"**

**'Yes, well, the idea seemed quite popular,' said Hermione happily. 'Ron, do you want to pull up some more chairs?' **

**The barman had frozen in the act of wiping out a glass with a rag so filthy it looked as though it had never been washed. Possibly, he had never seen his pub so full. 'Hi,' said Fred, reaching the bar first and counting his companions quickly, 'could we have… twenty-five Butterbeers, please?' **

"_Twenty-five_ students showed up for this, besides the trio?" asked Sirius in shock.

**The barman glared at him for a moment, then, throwing down his rag irritably as though he had been interrupted in something very important, he started passing up dusty Butterbeers from under the bar. 'Cheers,' said Fred, handing them out. 'Cough up, everyone, I haven't got enough gold for all of these…' Harry watched numbly as the large chattering group took their beers from Fred and rummaged in their robes to find coins. He could not imagine what all the people had turned up for**

"They're here because they believe you, or at least don't think you're a liar, and are interested in learning proper Defence Against Dark Arts," said Remus.

**until the horrible thought occurred to him that they might be expecting some kind of speech, at which he rounded on Hermione. 'What have you been telling people?' he said in a low voice. 'What are they expecting?' **

'**I've told you, they just want to hear what you've got to say,' said Hermione soothingly; but Harry continued to look at her so furiously that she added quickly, 'you don't have to do anything yet, I'll speak to them first.' **

**'Hi, Harry,' said Neville, beaming and taking a seat opposite him. Harry tried to smile back, but did not speak; his mouth was exceptionally dry. Cho had just smiled at him and sat down on Ron's right. Her friend, who had curly reddish-blonde hair, did not smile, but gave Harry a thoroughly mistrustful look which plainly told him that, given her way, she would not be here at all.**

"So why did she even bother to come?" inquired James. "Cho must have dragged her along. The girl probably doesn't want to go against Umbridge."

**In twos and threes the new arrivals settled around Harry, Ron and Hermione, some looking rather excited, others curious, Luna Lovegood gazing dreamily into space.**

**When everybody had pulled up a chair, the chatter died out. Every eye was upon Harry. 'Er,' said Hermione, her voice slightly higher than usual out of nerves. 'Well – er – hi.' **

**The group focused its attention on her instead, though eyes continued to dart back regularly to Harry. 'Well… erm… well, you know why you're here. Erm… well, Harry here had the idea, I mean – (Harry had thrown her a sharp look) – I had the idea – that it might be good if people who wanted to study Defence Against the Dark Arts – and I mean, really study it, you know, not the rubbish that Umbridge is doing with us –' (Hermione's voice became suddenly much stronger and more confident) '–because nobody could call that Defence Against the Dark Arts–' ('Hear, hear,' said Anthony Goldstein, and Hermione looked heartened) '–Well, I though it would be good if we, well, took matters into our own hands.' She paused, looked sideways at Harry, and went on, 'And by that I mean learning how to defend us properly, not just in theory but doing the real spells –' **

"**You want to pass your Defence Against the Dark Arts OWL too, though, I bet?" said Michael Corner, who was watching her closely. **

"Yes, but what's more important is that Moldywart's back and they need be able to fight back against him," said James.

'**Of course I do,' said Hermione at once. 'But more than that, I want to be properly trained in defence because… because…' she took a great breath and finished, 'because Lord Voldemort is back.' The reaction was immediate and predictable. Cho's friend shrieked and slopped Butterbeer down herself; Terry Boot gave a kind of involuntary twitch; Padma Patil shuddered, and Neville gave an odd yelp that he managed to turn into a cough. **

"Oh please, it's just a name," said Sirius in exasperation. "There's nothing to be afraid of."

**All of them, however, looked fixedly, even eagerly, at Harry. **

'**Well… that's the plan, anyway,' said Hermione. 'If you want to join us, we need to decide how we're going to ‐'**

'**Where's the proof You-Know-Who's back?' said the blond Hufflepuff player in a rather aggressive voice. **

"Hmm, how about the fact that Harry saw it?" snapped James sarcastically.

'**Well, Dumbledore believes it –' Hermione began. **

'**You mean, Dumbledore believes him,' said the blond boy, nodding at Harry. **

'**Who are you?' said Ron, rather rudely. **

'**Zacharias Smith,' said the boy, 'and I think we've got the right to know what makes him say You-Know-Who's back.' **

'**Exactly', Zacharias said dismissively, 'All Dumbledore told us last year was that Cedric Diggory got killed by You-Know-Who and that you brought Diggory's body back to Hogwarts. He didn't give us details, he didn't tell us exactly how Diggory got murdered, I think we'd all like to know was supposed to be about ‐'**

"If you're to here to just hear about what happened with Voldemort and Cedric, you can leave," snapped Sirius angrily.

**'Look,' said Hermione, intervening swiftly, 'that's really not what this meeting –"**

'**It's OK, Hermione,' said Harry. It had just dawned on him why there were so many people there. Hermione should have seen this coming. Some of these people –maybe even most of them – had turned up in the hopes of hearing Harry's story firsthand. **

"I don't think the Weasleys, Luna, Neville, Cho, the chasers, and Ernie and his friends are there to hear Harry's story firsthand," said Remus. "In the case of the Weasleys, they already know, and the rest have said that they believe Harry."

'**What makes me say You-Know-Who's back?' he repeated, looking Zacharias straight in the face. 'I saw him. But Dumbledore told the whole school what happened last year, and if you didn't believe him, you won't believe me, and I'm not wasting an afternoon trying to convince anyone.' The whole group seemed to have held its breath while Harry spoke. Harry had the impression that even the barman was listening. He was wiping the same glass with the filthy rag, making it steadily dirtier.**

'**I don't want to talk about Cedric Diggory, all right? So if that's what you're here for, you might as well clear out.' He cast an angry look in Hermione's direction. This was, he felt, all her fault; she had decided to display him like some sort of freak and of course they had all turned up to see just how wild his story was. **

"Harry James Potter!' exclaimed Lily indignantly. "Hermione's not displaying you like a freak in the circus! She just wants you to teach Defence."

**But none of them left their seats, not even Zacharias Smith, though he continued to gaze intently at Harry. 'If you've come to hear exactly what it looks like when Voldemort murders someone I can't help you,' Harry said. His temper, always so close to the surface these days, was rising again. He did not take his eyes from Zacharias Smith's aggressive face, and was determined not to look at Cho.**

**'So,' said Hermione, her voice very high-pitched again. 'So… like I was saying… if you want to learn some defence, then we need to work out how we're going to do it, how often we're going to meet and where we're going to -' **

'**Is it true,' interrupted the girl with the long plait down her back, looking at Harry, 'that you can produce a Patronus?' **

"Yes, it's true," said Peter.

**There was a murmur of interest around the group at this. **

**'Yeah,' said Harry slightly defensively. **

'**A corporeal Patronus?' **

"Isn't that the phrase Amelia Bones used?" asked James. "Could this girl be related to her?" Remus picked up the first book and flipped through it.

"Well, during the Sorting, a girl named Susan Bones is mentioned as getting sorted into Hufflepuff. So I think she could be."

**The phrase stirred something in Harry's memory. **

**'Er – you don't know Madam Bones, do you?' he asked. **

**The girl smiled. **

'**She's my auntie,' she said. 'I'm Susan Bones. **

"So, you're right, Remus," commented Sirius.

**She told me about your hearing. So – is it really true? You make a stag Patronus?' **

**'Yes,' said Harry. **

**'Blimey, Harry!' said Lee, looking deeply impressed. 'I never knew that!' **

'**Mum told Ron not to spread it around,' said Fred, grinning at Harry. 'She said you got enough attention as it was.' **

"Well, she's not wrong about that," said Lily.

'**She's not wrong,' mumbled Harry, and a couple of people laughed. **

**The veiled witch sitting alone shifted very slightly in her seat. **

'**And did you kill a Basilisk with that sword in Dumbledore's office?' demanded Terry Boot. 'That's what one of the portraits on the wall told me when I was in there last year…'**

"And why would Terry Boot be in Dumbledore's office?" asked Peter. "Did he get in some big trouble that needed him to see Dumbledore?"

"Who knows?" replied James, shrugging.

'**Er - yeah, I did, yeah,' said Harry. **

**Justin Finch-Fletchley whistled; the Creevey brothers exchanged awestruck looks and Lavender Brown said 'Wow!' softly. **

"I thought the school knew about what happened at the end of Harry's second year," said Lily.

"They probably knew that Harry and Ron went to rescue Ginny and succeeded, but not all the details, like Harry killing the basilisk," answered Remus.

**Harry was feeling slightly hot around the collar now; he was determinedly looking anywhere but at Cho. **

'**And in our first year,' said Neville to the group at large, 'he saved that Philological Stone -' **

"It's Philosopher's Stone, Neville," said Sirius.

**'Philosopher's,' hissed Hermione. **

**'Yes, that – from You-Know-Who,' finished Neville. **

**Hannah Abbott's eyes were as round as Galleons. **

'**And that's not to mention,' said Cho (Harry's eyes snapped across to her; she was looking at him, smiling; his stomach did another somersault)**

Sirius opened his mouth to tease Harry, but a glare from Lily silence him.

'**all the tasks he had to get through in the Triwizard Tournament last year – getting past dragons and merpeople and Acromantula and things…' **

"That's true," said James. "You were great, son. And your forte is Defence Against Dark Arts, along with Quidditch. You know, you'd really make a great Auror, Harry."

**There was a murmur of impressed agreement around the table. Harry's insides were squirming. He was trying to arrange his face so that he did not look too pleased with himself. The fact that Cho had just praised him made it much, much harder for him to say the thing he had sworn to himself he would tell them. **

**'Look,' he said, and everyone fell silent at once, 'I… I don't want to sound like I'm trying to be modest or anything, but… I had a lot of help with all that stuff…' **

"Okay, so Ron and Hermione helped you look of spells and practiced with you," said Lily. "But you still did the spells on your own and fought all those things, Harry. And nobody helped you with the riddle the Sphinx asked."

'**Not with the dragon, you didn't,' said Michael Corner at once. 'That was a seriously cool bit of flying…' **

"It was," admitted Remus. "But Harry still had help. The fake Moody hinted flying was the best way to get past the dragon."

**'Yeah, well –' said Harry, feeling it would be churlish to disagree. **

'**And nobody helped you get rid of those Dementors this summer,' said Susan Bones. **

**'No,' said Harry, 'no, OK, I know I did bits of it without help, but the point I'm trying to make is –' **

'**Are you trying to weasel out of showing us any of this stuff?' said Zacharias Smith. **

'**Here's an idea,' said Ron loudly, before Harry could speak, 'why don't you shut your mouth?' **

**Perhaps the word 'weasel' had affected Ron particularly strongly. In any case, he was now looking at Zacharias as though he would like nothing better than to thump him. Zacharias flushed. **

'**Well, we've all turned up to learn from him and now he's telling us he can't really do any of it,' he said. **

"That's not what Harry said!" exclaimed Peter. "Harry's just being modest about all the stuff he did."

'**That's not what he said,' snarled Fred. **

'**Would you like us to clean out your ears for you?' enquired George, pulling a long and lethal-looking metal instrument from inside one of the Zonko's bags. **

'**Or any part of your body, really, we're not fussy where we stick this,' said Fred.**

"I really don't like this Zacharias Smith," said Sirius. "Why did Hermione invite him?"

"He probably heard Hermione tell the other Hufflepuffs about the meeting and expressed interest in joining," responded Remus. "And Hermione didn't want to refuse in case he would get mad if she did and tell Umbridge."

**'Yes, well,' said Hermione hastily, 'moving on… the point is, are we agreed we want to take lessons from Harry?' **

**There was a murmur of general agreement. Zacharias folded his arms and said nothing, though perhaps this was because he was too busy keeping an eye on the instrument in Fred's hand. **

**'Right,' said Hermione, looking relieved that something had at last been settled. 'Well, then, the next question is how often we do it. I really don't think there's any point in meeting less than once a week –' **

'**Hang on,' said Angelina, 'we need to make sure this doesn't clash with our Quidditch practice.' **

**'No,' said Cho, 'nor with ours.' **

'**Nor ours,' added Zacharias Smith. **

"Just do it the night Slytherin has their practice and the problem's solved," said James.

'**I'm sure we can find a night that suits everyone,' said Hermione, slightly impatiently, 'but you know, this is rather important, we're talking about learning to defend ourselves against V-Voldemort's Death Eaters –' **

'**Well said!' barked Ernie Macmillan, who Harry had been expecting to speak long before this. 'Personally I think this is really important, possibly more important than anything else we'll do this year, even with our OWLs coming up!'**

"Glad that he supports the whole thing," said Sirius. "It makes up for his thinking Harry was the Heir of Slytherin and being a bit rude to him during the Triwizard Tournament."

**He looked around impressively, as though waiting for people to cry 'Surely not!' When nobody spoke, he went on, 'I, personally am at a loss to see why the Ministry has foisted such a useless teacher on us at this critical period. Obviously, they are in denial about the return of You-Know-Who, but to give us a teacher who is trying to actively prevent us from using defensive spells –' **

'**We think the reason Umbridge doesn't want us trained in Defence Against the Dark Arts,' said Hermione, 'is that she's got some… some mad idea that Dumbledore could use the students in the school as a kind of private army. She thinks he'd mobilise us against the Ministry.' **

"Oh please," said Sirius. "Like I said before, Dumbledore would make out with a guy before he'd form an army and attack the Ministry."

Lily rolled her eyes and Peter asked, "What if Dumbledore really does swing that way?"

The others stared at him. Then Remus said, "Not likely," and the matter was closed.

**Nearly everybody looked stunned at this news; everybody except Luna Lovegood, who piped up, 'Well, that makes sense. After all, Cornelius Fudge has got his own private army.' **

"He does?" asked Lily. "Or is this one of the crazy theories that Luna believes?"

**'What?' said Harry, completely thrown by this unexpected piece of information. **

**'Yes, he's got an army of Heliopaths,' said Luna solemnly. **

"First of all, what are Heliopaths?" asked James. "Second, do they even exist? And third, I very much doubt that Fudge would have an army of them."

**'No, he hasn't,' snapped Hermione. **

**'Yes, he has,' said Luna. **

'**What are Heliopaths?' asked Neville, looking blank. **

'**They're spirits of fire,' said Luna, her protuberant eyes widening so that she looked madder than ever, 'great tall flaming creatures that gallop across the ground burning everything in front of ‐' **

"Oh-kay," said Remus. "I'm certain that such creatures don't exist. It looks like it's one of the weird stuff Luna believes."

'**They don't exist, Neville,' said H****ermione tartly. **

**'Oh, yes, they do!' said Luna angrily. **

'I'm sorry, but where's the proof of that?' snapped Hermione.

'**There are plenty of eye-witness accounts. Just because you're so narrow-minded you need to have everything shoved under your nose before you –' **

"You know, I think Luna's Hermione complete opposite," said Lily. "Hermione's logical, while Luna takes things on faith."

**Hem, hem****,' said Ginny, in such a good imitation of Professor Umbridge that several people looked around in alarm and then laughed. 'Weren't we trying to decide how often we're going to meet and have defence lessons?' **

'**Yes,' said Hermione at once, 'yes, we were, you're right, Ginny.' **

'**Well, once a week sounds cool,' said Lee Jordan. **

'**As long as –' began Angelina. **

**'Yes, yes, we know about the Quidditch,' said Hermione in a tense voice. Well, the other thing to decide is where we're going to meet…'**

"You could have meetings here," said Sirius. "In the Room of Requirement. It would fit everyone, and provide everything you need to learn proper Defence Against Dark Arts."

"Well, first, one of them has to know about the Room of Requirement, Padfoot," reminded James.

**This was rather more difficult; the whole group fell silent. **

**'Library?' suggested Katie Bell after a few moments. **

'**I can't see Madam Pince being too chuffed with us doing jinxes in the library,' said Harry. **

'**Maybe an unused classroom?' said Dean. **

'**Yeah,' said Ron, 'McGonagall might let us have hers, she did when Harry was practising for the Triwizard.' **

**But Harry was pretty certain that McGonagall would not be so accommodating this time. For all that Hermione had said about study and homework groups being allowed, he had the distinct feeling that this one might be considered a lot more rebellious. **

"Ask me or Remus for advice, Harry," said Sirius. "We'd be able to tell you about the Room of Requirement."

**'Right, well, we'll try to find somewhere,' said Hermione. 'We'll send a message round to everybody when we've got a time and a place for the first meeting.' **

**She rummaged in her bag and produced parchment and a quill, and then hesitated, rather as though she was steeling herself to say something. **

'**I – I think everybody should write their name down, just so we know who was here. But I also think,' she took a deep breath, 'that we all ought to agree not to shout about what we're doing. So if you sign, you're agreeing not to tell Umbridge or anybody else what we're up to.' **

**Fred reached out for the parchment and cheerfully wrote his signature, but Harry noticed at once that several people looked less than happy at the prospect of putting their names on the list. **

"Oh please, Hermione's not going to leave that list lying around where Umb!tch or any other teacher can see it," said Lily.

'**Er...' said Zacharias slowly, not taking the parchment that George was trying to pass to him, 'well ... I'm sure Ernie will tell me when the meeting is.' **

**But Ernie was looking rather hesitant about signing, too. Hermione raised her eyebrows at him. **

**'I – well, we are **_**prefects**_**,' Ernie burst out. 'And if this list was found… well, I mean to say…you said yourself, if Umbridge finds out –' **

'**You just said this group was the most important thing you'd do this year,' Harry reminded him. **

**'I – yes,' said Ernie, 'yes, I do believe that, it's just –' **

**'Ernie, do you really think I'd leave that list lying around?' said Hermione testily. **

**'No. No, of course not,' said Ernie, looking slightly less anxious. 'I – yes, of course I'll sign.' **

"Good," said James, arms crossed.

**Nobody raised objections after Ernie, though Harry saw Cho's friend give her a rather reproachful look before adding her own name. When the last person –Zacharias – had signed, Hermione took the parchment back and slipped it carefully into her bag. There was an odd feeling in the group now. It was as though they had just signed some kind of contract. **

'**Well, time's ticking on,' said Fred briskly, getting to his feet. 'George, Lee and I have got items of a sensitive nature to purchase, we'll be seeing you all later.' In twos and threes the rest of the group took their leave, too. **

**Cho made rather a business of fastening the catch on her bag before leaving, her long dark curtain of hair swinging forwards to hide her face, **

"Oooh, it looks as if Cho wants to stay behind a bit for a chance to talk with Harry," said Sirius, a delighted looks on his face. "Harry and Cho, sitting in a –" He shut his mouth at a glare from Lily.

**but her friend stood beside her, arms folded, clicking her tongue, so that Cho had little choice but to leave with her. As her friend ushered her through the door, Cho looked back and waved at Harry. **

'**Well, I think that went quite well,' said Hermione happily, as she, Harry and Ron walked out of the Hog's Head into the bright sunlight a few moments later. Harry and Ron were clutching their bottles of Butterbeer. 'That Zacharias bloke's a wart,' said Ron, who was glowering after the figure of Smith, just discernible in the distance. **

"I agree," said Sirius.

'**I don't like him much, either,' admitted Hermione, 'but he overheard me talking to Ernie and Hannah at the Hufflepuff table and he seemed really interested in coming, so what could I say? But the more people the better really – I mean, Michael Corner and his friends wouldn't have come if he hadn't been going out with Ginny –' **

**Ron, who had been draining the last few drops from his Butterbeer bottle, gagged and sprayed Butterbeer down his front. **

"Eww," said Lily, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

"Well, it looks like Ron wasn't expecting this but of news," said Peter.

'**He's WHAT?' spluttered Ron, outraged, his ears now resembling curls of raw beef. 'She's going out with – my sister's going – what d'you mean, Michael Corner?' **

'**Well, that's why he and his friends came, I think –well, they're obviously interested in learning defence, but if Ginny hadn't told Michael what was going on –'**

**'When did this – when did she –?' **

"Well, it's obvious Ron's not reacting well to this news," said James. "Why is it older brothers tend to be so protective of younger sisters?"

'**They met at the Yule Ball and got together at the end of last year,' said Hermione composedly. They had turned into the High Street and she paused outside Scrivenshaft's Quill Shop, where there was a handsome display of pheasant feather quills in the window. 'Hmm… I could do with a new quill.' **

**She turned into the shop. Harry and Ron followed her. **

'**Which one was Michael Corner?' Ron demanded furiously. **

'**The dark one,' said Hermione. **

'**I didn't like him,' said Ron at once. **

"What a big surprise," Lily muttered.

'**Big surprise,' said Hermione under her breath. **

**'But,' said Ron, following Hermione along a row of quills in copper pots, 'I thought Ginny fancied Harry!'**

"But apparently it looks like Ginny doesn't any more," said Remus. "Besides, Harry's attracted to Cho at the moment, so it wouldn't matter if Ginny still fancied him."

"Maybe Harry _will_ break the Potter trend of marrying redheads," remarked James.

**Hermione looked at him rather pityingly and shook her head. 'Ginny used to fancy Harry, but she gave up on him months ago. Not that she doesn't like you, of course,' she added kindly to Harry while she examined a long black and gold quill.**

**Harry, whose head was still full of Cho's parting wave, did not find this subject quite as interesting as Ron, who was positively quivering with indignation, but it did bring something home to him that until now he had not really registered.**

'**So that's why she talks now?' he asked Hermione. 'She never used to talk in front of me.' **

**'Exactly,' said Hermione. 'Yes, I think I'll have this one…' **

**She went up to the counter and handed over fifteen Sickles and two Knuts, with Ron still breathing down her neck. **

**'Ron,' she said severely as she turned and trod on his feet, 'this is exactly why Ginny hasn't told you she's seeing Michael, she knew you'd take it badly. So don't harp**** on**** about it, for heaven's sake.' **

"Good luck about that," said Lily. "I wouldn't be surprised if Ron confronted Michael and threatened all manner of horrible things if he hurt Ginny."

'**What d'you mean? Who's taking anything badly? I'm not going to harp on about anything…' Ron continued to chunter under his breath all the way down the street. **

"Yeah right," muttered Remus.

**Hermione rolled her eyes at Harry and then said in an undertone, while Ron was still muttering imprecations about Michael Corner, 'And talking about Michael and Ginny…what about Cho and you?' **

"What about Harry and Cho?" asked Sirius with great interest.

'**What d'you mean?' said Harry quickly. **

**It was as though boiling water was rising rapidly inside him; a burning sensation that was causing his face to smart in the cold – had he been that obvious? **

"Not really," said James. "You weren't looking at Cho most of the time."

**'Well,' said Hermione, smiling slightly, 'she just couldn't keep her eyes off you, could she?' **

**Harry had never before appreciated just how beautiful the village of Hogsmeade was. **

James and Sirius sniggered, but didn't say anything. "Well, this chapter turned out better than the last," said Peter. "I'll read next." Lily handed the book to him and he began.


	17. Educational Decree Number Twenty Four

Author's Note: My sister, Lady Alianne, wrote most of the comments, thereby enabling me to update. This will be the last chapter up before Christmas. There won't be anymore until after the holidays. I hope all my readers/reviewers have a happy holiday and enjoy themselves.

— **CHAPTER SEVENTEEN — **

**Educational Decree Number Twenty-Four**

"Excuse me?" sputtered James. "An Educational Decree? Like the one that resulted in Umb!tch being hired? This doesn't sound good."

"What do you want to bet that it has something to do with the secret Defence group?" asked Sirius bitterly.

**Harry felt happier for the rest of the weekend than he had done all term. **

"You should be," said Lily warmly. "You're doing something to resist the Ministry and Umbitch, and a number of your classmates believe you, or at least are willing to learn from you."

**He and Ron spent much of Sunday catching up with all their homework again, and although this could hardly be called fun, the last burst of autumn sunshine persisted, so rather than sitting hunched over tables in the common room they took their work outside and lounged in the shade of a large beech tree on the edge of the lake. Hermione, who of course was up to date with all her work, brought more wool outside with her and bewitched her knitting needles so that they flashed and clicked in midair beside her, producing more hats and scarves. **

**Knowing they were doing something to resist Umbridge and the Ministry, and that he was a key part of the rebellion, gave Harry a feeling of immense satisfaction. He kept reliving Saturdays meeting in his mind: all those people, coming to him to learn Defence Against the Dark Arts… and the looks on their faces as they had heard some of the things he had done… and Cho praising his performance in the Triwizard Tournament - knowing all those people did not think him a lying weirdo, but someone to be admired, buoyed him up so much that he was still cheerful on Monday morning, despite the imminent prospect of all his least favourite classes. **

"That's good," said Peter, smiling.

**He and Ron headed downstairs from their dormitory, discussing Angelina's idea that they were to work on a new move called the Sloth Grip Roll during that night's Quidditch practice, and not until they were halfway across the sunlit common room did they notice the addition to the room that had already attracted the attention of a small group of people. **

"It's not the new educational decree, is it?" asked Remus, looking alarmed.

**A large sign had been affixed to the Gryffindor noticeboard; so large it covered everything else on it - the lists of secondhand spellbooks for sale, the regular reminders of school rules from Argus Filch, the Quidditch team training timetable, the offers to barter certain Chocolate Frog Cards for others, the Weasleys' latest advertisement for testers, the dates of the Hogsmeade weekends and the lost and found notices. The new sign was printed in large black letters and there was a highly official-looking seal at the bottom beside a neat and curly signature. **

"I think it is the new decree," said James. "This is not good."

_**BY ORDER OF THE HIGH INQUISITOR**_** _OF HOGWARTS_**

**_All student organisations, societies, teams, groups and clubs are henceforth disbanded._**

"I think the new Defence group has been found out," said Remus, frowning. "Either someone at the meeting told, or one of the customers overheard and reported it."

**_An organisation, society, team, group or club is hereby defined as a regular meeting of three or more students._**

"But what if three or more friends meet together every day to work on homework together?" asked Lily. "Would that count as a club of some sort?"

"Who knows?" answered James. "They'll just have to ask a teacher." 

**_Permission to reform may be sought from the High Inquisitor (Professor Umbridge)._**

**_No student organisation, society, team, group or club may exist without the knowledge and approval of the High Inquisitor._**

**_Any student found to have formed, or to belong to, an organisation, society, team, group or club that has not been approved by the High Inquisitor will be expelled._**

**_The above is in accordance with Educational Decree Number Twenty-four._**

"A new decree," said Peter, sounding dismal. "This is not good."

**_Signed: Dolores Jane Umbridge, High Inquisitor_**

**Harry and Ron read the notice over the heads of some anxious-looking second-years. **

'**Does this mean they're going to shut down the Gobstones Club?' one of them asked his friend. **

'**I reckon you'll be OK with Gobstones,' Ron said darkly, making the second-year jump. 'I don't think we're going to be as lucky, though, do you?' he asked Harry as the second-years hurried away. **

"No, you won't be as lucky," said Sirius. He hurriedly began adding to his list.

**Harry was reading the notice through again. The happiness that had filled him since Saturday was gone. His insides were pulsing with rage. **

'**This isn't a coincidence,' he said, his hands forming fists. 'She knows.'**

'**She can't,' said Ron at once. **

**'There were people listening in that pub. And let's face it, we don't know how many of the people who turned up we can trust… any of them could have run off and told Umbridge…' **

"Yeah," said James. "You really should have held the meeting at the Three Broomsticks, where there was less chance of you being overheard. Then all you'd have to worry about was if any of the people who turned up were trustworthy or not."

"Well, most of them wouldn't have told," said Remus thoughtfully. "The only ones that we should really worry about is that Zacharais Smith and maybe the Ravenclaw boys and Cho's friend. I don't see the Gryffindors, the other Hufflepuffs, Cho, Padma, and Luna reporting it to Umbridge."

"Speaking of the Gryffindors, how did Dennis Creevy get to the meeting?" asked Lily. "I just realized that he would only be a second year, since he was a first year in the last book. You need to be a third year to be able to visit Hogsmeade."

The others shrugged. "Maybe the rules changed so second-years could go," suggested Sirius. "Or maybe it was a mistake by the author. Or maybe Dennis snuck into Hogsmeade for the meeting."

"Dennis sneaking in or the author making a mistake is more likely," said Peter. "The rules haven't been changed in years, and I doubt they will in the future."

**And he had thought they believed him, thought they even admired him… **

'**Zacharias Smith!' said Ron at once, punching a fist into his hand. 'Or - I thought that Michael Corner had a really shifty look, too -' **

'**I wonder if Hermione's seen this yet?' Harry said, looking round at the door to the girls' dormitories. **

'**Let's go and tell her,' said Ron. He bounded forwards, pulled open the door and set off up the spiral staircase. **

"Bad idea!" cried Peter. "The stairs turn into a slide, because boys aren't allowed in the girls' dormatories."

**He was on the sixth stair when there was a loud, wailing, klaxon-like sound and the steps melted together to make a long, smooth stone slide like a helter-skelter. There was a brief moment when Ron tried to keep running, arms working madly like windmills, then he toppled over backwards and shot down the newly created slide, coming to rest on his back at Harry's feet. **

**'Er - I don't think we're allowed in the girls' dormitories,' said Harry, pulling Ron to his feet and trying not to laugh. **

**Two fourth-year girls came zooming gleefully down the stone slide. **

**'Oooh, who tried to get upstairs?' they giggled happily, leaping to their feet and ogling Harry and Ron. **

**'Me,' said Ron, who was still rather dishevelled. 'I didn't realise that would happen. It's not fair!' he added to Harry, as the girls headed off for the portrait hole, still giggling madly. 'Hermione's allowed in our dormitory, how come we're not allowed -?' **

"It's because the Founders thought girls were more trustworthy than boys," said Lily.

**'Well, it's an old-fashioned rule,' said Hermione, who had just slid neatly on to a rug in front of them and was now getting to her feet, 'but it says in _Hogwarts, _****_A History_****, that the founders thought boys were less trustworthy than girls. Anyway, why were you trying to get in there?' **

'**To see you - look at this!' said Ron, dragging her over to the noticeboard. **

**Hermione's eyes slid rapidly down the notice. Her expression became stony. **

'**Someone must have blabbed to her!' Ron said angrily. **

'**They can't have done,' said Hermione in a low voice. **

'**You're so naive,' said Ron, 'you think just because you're all honourable and trustworthy -' **

**'No, they can't have done, because I put a jinx on that piece of parchment we all signed,' said Hermione grimly. **

"That was rather clever of her," remarked James. "So anyone who tries to tell will regret doing it."

**'Believe me, if anyone's run off and told Umbridge, we'll know exactly who they are and they will really regret it.'**

'**What'll happen to them?' said Ron eagerly. **

**'Well, put it this way,' said Hermione, 'it'll make Eloise Midgeon's acne look like a couple of cute freckles. **

"Oooh, I think I know what jinx it is!" exclaimed Sirius. "I think it would be great to have it done on Umbitch or Malfoy or anyone else we have lists for." He quickly jotted it down on his list of prank ideas.

**Come on, let's get down to breakfast and see what the others think… I wonder whether this has been put up in all the houses?' **

**It was immediately apparent on entering the Great Hall that Umbridge's sign had not only appeared in Gryffindor Tower. There was a peculiar intensity about the chatter and an extra measure of movement in the Hall as people scurried up and down their tables conferring on what they had read. Harry, Ron and Hermione had barely taken their seats when Neville, Dean, Fred, George and Ginny descended upon them. **

'**Did you see it?'**

'**D'you reckon she knows?' **

'**What are we going to do?' **

**They were all looking at Harry. He glanced around to make sure there were no teachers near them. **

'**We're going to do it anyway of course,' he said quietly. **

"That's great!" exclaimed James with delight. "You'll just have to make sure Umbitch doesn't find out and find a good place to meet. The Room of Requirement is probably the best place."

'**Knew you'd say that,' said George, beaming and thumping Harry on the arm. **

**'The prefects as well?' said Fred, looking quizzically at Ron and Hermione. **

'**Of course,' said Hermione coolly. **

'**Here come Ernie and Hannah Abbott,' said Ron, looking over his shoulder. '**_**And**_** those Ravenclaw blokes and Smith… and no one looks very spotty.' **

**Hermione looked alarmed. **'**Never mind spots, the idiots can't come over here now, it'll look really suspicious - sit down!' she mouthed to Ernie and Hannah, gesturing frantically to them to rejoin the Hufflepuff table. 'Later! We'll - talk - to - you - later!' **

'**I'll tell Michael,' said Ginny impatiently, swinging herself off her bench, 'the fool, honestly…' **

"If he's a fool, why is Ginny even dating him?" asked Remus.

"Who cares?" asked Sirius. "It's not really important."

**She hurried off towards the Ravenclaw table; Harry watched her go. Cho was sitting not far away, talking to the curly-haired friend she had brought along to the Hog's Head. Would Umbridge have notice scare her off meeting them again? ****But the full repercussions of the sign were not felt until they were leaving the Great Hall for History of Magic. **

"What other repercussions does the sign have?" asked Peter. The others looked puzzled and had no answer.

**'Harry! Ron!' **

**It was Angelina and she was hurrying towards them looking perfectly desperate. **

'**It's OK,' said Harry quietly, when she was near enough to hear him. 'We're still going to -' **

'**You realise she's including Quidditch in this?' Angelina said over him. **

"_What!_?" they all demanded at once. James and Sirius looked furious, while the rest were merely angry.

"She can't do this!" shouted James. "The Quidditch teams shouldn't have to ask permission to reform! Well, maybe Slytherin should and be denied. But the other house teams shouldn't!"

**'We have to go and ask permission to reform the Gryffindor team!' **

**'What****?' said Harry. **

'**No way,' said Ron, appalled. **

'**You read the sign, it mentions teams too! So listen, Harry… I am saying this for the last time… please, please don't lose your temper with Umbridge again or she might not let us play any more!' **

**'OK, OK,' said Harry, for Angelina looked as though she was on the verge of tears. 'Don't worry, I'll behave myself…' **

"You'd better," said Lily darkly. "Though this shouldn't even be happening in the first place."

'**Bet Umbridge is in History of Magic,' said Ron grimly, as they set off for Binn's lesson. 'She hasn't inspected Bins yet… bet you anything she's there…' **

**But he was wrong; the only teacher present when they entered was Professor Binns, floating an inch or so above his chair as usual and preparing to continue his monotonous drone on giant wars. Harry did not even attempt to follow what h****e was saying today; he doodled idly on his parchment, ignoring Hermione's frequent glares and nudges, until a particularly painful poke in the ribs made him look up angrily. **

**'What?'**

**She pointed at the window. Harry looked round. Hedwig was perched on the narrow window ledge, gazing through the thick glass at him, a letter tied to her leg. Harry could not understand it; they had just had breakfast, why on earth hadn't she delivered the letter then, as usual? Many of his classmates were pointing out Hedwig to each other, too. **

**'Oh, I've always loved that owl, she's so beautiful,' Harry heard Lavender sigh to Parvati. **

The Marauders exchanged looks and Sirius muttered, "Girls." Lily glared at him.

**He glanced round at Professor Binns who continued to read his notes, serenely unaware that the class's attention was even less focused upon him than usual. Harry slipped quietly off his chair, crouched down and hurried along the row to the window, where he slid the catch and opened it very slowly. **

**He had expected Hedwig to hold out her leg so that he could remove the letter and then fly off to the Owlery but the moment the window was open wide enough she hopped inside, hooting dolefully. He closed the window with an anxious glance at Professor Binns, crouched low again and sped back to his seat with Hedwig on his shoulder. He regained his seat, transferred Hedwig to his lap and made to remove the letter tied to her leg. **

**Only then did he realise that Hedwig's feathers were oddly ruffled; some were bent the wrong way, and she was holding one of her wings at an odd angle. **

"Hedwig's injuried!" cried Peter, looking alarmed. "How did that happen? Did someone or something attack her?"

'**She's hurt!' Harry whispered, bending his head low over her. Hermione and Ron leaned in closer; Hermione even put down her quill. 'Look - there's something wrong with her wing -' **

**Hedwig was quivering; when Harry made to touch the wing she gave a little jump, all her feathers on end as though she was inflating herself, and gazed at him reproachfully. **

'**Professor Binns,' said Harry loudly, and everyone in the class turned to look at him. 'I'm not feeling well.' **

**Professor Binns raised his eyes from his notes, looking amazed, as always, to find the room in front of him full of people. **

'**Not feeling well?' he repeated hazily. **

'**Not at all well,' said Harry firmly getting to his feet with Hedwig concealed behind his back. 'I think I need to go to the hospital wing.' **

**'Yes,' said Professor Binns, clearly very much wrong-footed. 'Yes… yes, hospital wing… well, off you go, then, Perkins…' **

"Binns called me that once," commented James.

**Once outside the room, Harry returned Hedwig to his shoulder and hurried off up the corridor, pausing to think only when he was out of sight of Binns's door. His first choice of somebody to cure Hedwig would have been Hagrid, of course, but as he had no idea where Hagrid was his only remaining option was to find Professor Grubbly-Plank and hope she would help. **

**He peered out of a window at the blustery, overcast grounds. There was no sign of her anywhere near Hagrid's cabin; if she was not teaching, she was probably in the staff room. He set off downstairs, Hedwig hooting feebly as she swayed on his shoulder. **

**Two stone gargoyles flanked the staff-room door. As Harry approached, one of them croaked, 'You should be in class, Sonny Jim.' **

"I wonder why the gargoyle is calling Harry 'Sonny Jim'," murmered Lily.

"Well, the gargoyle calls me 'Jim', which is short for James," said James. "And since Harry looks like me and is my son, 'Sonny Jim' could fit."

**'This is urgent,' said Harry curtly. **

**'Ooooh, **_**urgent**_**, is it?' said the other gargoyle in a high-pitched voice. 'Well, that's put us in our place, hasn't it?' **

**Harry knocked. He heard footsteps, then the door opened and he found himself face to face with Professor McGonagall. **

'**You haven't been given another detention!' she said at once, her square spectacles flashing alarmingly. **

**'No, Professor!' said Harry hastily. **

'**Well then, why are you out of class?' **

'**It's **_**urgent**_**, apparently,' said the second gargoyle snidely. **

'**I'm looking for Professor Grubbly-Plank,' Harry explained. 'It's my** owl, she's injured.' 

'**Injured owl, did you say?' ****Professor Grubbly-Plank appeared at Professor McGonagall's shoulder, smoking a pipe and holding a copy of the **_**Daily**_** _Prophet_.**

"Good, she can help," said Sirius. "Hedwig will be healed in no time."

'**Yes,' said Harry, lifting Hedwig carefully off his shoulder, 'she turned up after the other post owls and her wing's all funny, look -' **

**Professor Grubbly-Plank stuck her pipe firmly between her teeth and took Hedwig from Harry while Professor McGonagall watched. **

**'Hmm,' said Professor Grubbly-Plank, her pipe waggling slightly as she talked. 'Looks like something's attacked her. Can't think what would have done it, though. Thestrals will sometimes go for birds, of course, but Hagrid's got the Hogwarts Thestrals well-trained not to touch owls.' **

"What if someone attacked Hedwig in order to read Harry's mail?" asked Peter.

"It's very possible," responded Remus.

**Harry neither knew nor cared what Thestrals were; he just wanted to know that Hedwig was going to be all right. Professor McGonagall, however, looked sharply at Harry and said, 'Do you know how far this owl's travelled, Potter?' **

**'Er,' said Harry. 'From London, I think.' **

**He met her eyes briefly and knew, by the way her eyebrows had joined in the middle, that she understood 'London' to mean 'number twelve, Grimmauld Place'. **

**Professor Grubbly-Plank pulled a monocle out of the inside of her robes and screwed it into her eye, to examine Hedwig's wing closely. 'I should be able to sort this out if you leave her with me, Potter,' she said, 'she shouldn't be flying long distances for a few days, in any case.' **

"That's a relief," said Lily. "Hedwig will be fine in a few days and can send letters again."

**'Er - right - thanks,' said Harry, just as the bell rang for break. **

'**No problem,' said Professor Grubbly-Plank gruffly, turning back into the staff room. **

'**Just a moment, Wilhelmina!' said Professor McGonagall. 'Potter's letter!' **

'**Oh yeah!' said Harry, who had momentarily forgotten the scroll tied to Hedwig's leg. Professor Grubbly-Plank handed it over and then disappeared into the staff room carrying Hedwig, who was staring at Harry as though unable to believe he would give her away like this. Feeling slightly guilty, he turned to go, but Professor McGonagall called him back. **

**'Potter!' **

**'Yes, Professor?' **

**She glanced up and down the corridor; there were students coming from both directions. **

'**Bear in mind,' she said quickly and quietly, her eyes on the scroll in his hand, 'that channels of communication in and out of Hogwarts may be being watched, won't you?' **

"Heed McGonagall's warning, Harry," said James sternly. "We don't want Hedwig attacked again."

**'I -' said Harry, but the flood of students rolling along the corridor was almost upon him. Professor McGonagall gave him a curt nod and retreated into the staff room, leaving Harry to be swept out into the courtyard with the crowd. He spotted Ron and Hermione already standing in a sheltered corner, their cloak collars turned up against the wind. Harry slit open the scroll as he hurried towards them and found five words in Sirius's handwriting: **

**_Today, same time, same place_.**

"Well, unless someone knows what it's referring to, nobody can figure out what it means," said Remus,

'**Is Hedwig OK?' asked Hermione anxiously, the moment he was within earshot. **

**'Where did you take her?' asked Ron. **

'**To Grubbly-Plank,' said Harry. 'And I met McGonagall… listen…' **

**And he told them what Professor McGonagall had said. To his surprise, neither of the others looked shocked. On the contrary, they exchanged significant looks. **

**'What?' said Harry, looking from Ron to Hermione and back again? **

**'Well, I was just saying to Ron… what if someone had tried to intercept Hedwig? I mean, she's never been hurt on a flight before, has she?' **

"No, she hasn't," said Lily. "It is likely someone tried to intercept Hedwig."

'**Who's the letter from, anyway?' asked Ron, taking the note from Harry. **

**'Snuffles,' said Harry quietly. **

**"'Same time, same place?' Does he mean the fire in the common room?" **

**'Obviously,' said Hermione, also reading the note. She looked uneasy. 'I just hope nobody else has read this…' **

"But nobody else can figure out what it means, other than it's probably a meeting," protested Peter. "Nobody would have any clue as to what the meeting was, or when or where."

'**But it was still sealed and everything,' said Harry, trying to convince himself as much as her. 'And nobody would understand what it meant if they didn't know where we'd spoken to him before, would they?' **

'**I don't know,' said Hermione anxiously, hitching her bag back over her shoulder as the bell rang again, 'it wouldn't be exactly difficult to reseal the scroll by magic… and if anyone's watching the Floo Network… but I don't really see how we can warn him not to come without **_**that**_** being intercepted, too!' **

"This is not good," said James worriedly. He looked at Sirius. "I don't want you caught and sent back to Azkaban, mate."

"I don't intend to be," said Sirius. "My future self is going to be extra careful during the meeting with Harry."

**They trudged down the stone steps to the dungeons for Potions, all three of them lost in thought, but as they reached the bottom of the steps they were recalled to themselves by the voice of Draco Malfoy who was standing just outside Snape's classroom door, waving around an official-looking piece of parchment and talking much louder than was necessary so that they could hear every word. **

**'Yeah, Umbridge gave the Slytherin Quidditch team permission to continue playing straightaway; I went to ask her first thing this morning. Well, it was pretty much automatic, I mean, she knows my father really well, he's always popping in and out of the Ministry… it'll be interesting to see whether Gryffindor are allowed to keep playing, won't it?' **

"This is not good," said Lily, frowning. "It would be just like Umbridge to refuse to let Gryffindor reform or say that she hadn't made up her mind yet."

'**Don't rise,' Hermione whispered imploringly to Harry and Ron, who were both watching Malfoy, faces set and fists clenched. 'It's what he wants.' **

'**I mean,' said Malfoy, raising his voice a little more, his grey eyes glittering malevolently in Harry and Ron's direction, 'if it's a question of influence with the Ministry, I don't think they've got much chance… from what my father says, they've been looking for an excuse to sack Arthur Weasley for years… and as for Potter… my father says it's a matter of time before the Ministry has him carted off to St. Mungo's… apparently they've got a special ward for people whose brains have been addled by magic.' **

"How dare he!" they all raged.

**Malfoy made a grotesque face, his mouth sagging open and his eyes rolling. Crabbe and Goyle gave their usual grunts of laughter; Pansy Parkinson shrieked with glee. **

**Something collided hard with Harry's shoulder, knocking him sideways. A split second later he realised that Neville had just charged past him, heading straight for Malfoy. **

"Oh no, Malfoy really should not have made that comment," said Remus. "Neville's not going to like it, considering his parents."

**'Neville, no!' **

**Harry leapt forward and seized the back of Neville's robes; Neville struggled frantically, his fists flailing, trying desperately to get at Malfoy who looked, for a moment, extremely shocked. **

'**Help me!' Harry flung at Ron, managing to get an arm around Neville's neck and dragging him backwards, away from the Slytherins. Crabbe and Goyle were flexing their arms as they stepped in front of Malfoy, ready for the fight. Ron seized Neville's arms, and together he and Harry succeeded in dragging Neville back into the Gryffindor line. Neville's face was scarlet; the pressure Harry was exerting on his throat rendered him quite incomprehensible, but odd words spluttered from his mouth. **

**'Not… funny… don't… Mungo's… show… him…' **

"Yeah, Neville's definitely mad at what Malfoy said," commented Sirius, wincing.

**The dungeon door opened. Snape appeared there. His black eyes swept up the Gryffindor line to the point where Harry and Ron were wrestling with Neville. **

**'Fighting, Potter, Weasley, Longbottom?' Snape said in his cold, sneering voice. **

"They weren't fighting!" protested Peter. "Ron and Harry were stopping Neville from fighting with Malfoy!"

**'Ten points from Gryffindor. Release Longbottom, Potter, or it will be detention. Inside, all of you.' **

**Harry let go of Neville, who stood panting and glaring at him. **

'**I had to stop you,' Harry gasped, picking up his bag. 'Crabbe and Goyle would've torn you apart.' **

"True," said Lily. "Neville did get knocked by them in first year during that Quidditch match."

**Neville said nothing; he merely snatched up his own bag and stalked off into the dungeon. **

'**What in the name of Merlin,' said Ron slowly, as they followed Neville, 'was **_**that **_**about?' **

"Well, Neville's parents were tortured to insanity by my _dear_ cousin, her husband, brother-in-law, and Crouch Jr.," said Sirius sarcastically. "That was what it was about." He then began adding his lists.

**Harry did not answer. He knew exactly why the subject of people who were in St. Mungo's because of magical damage to their brains was highly distressing to Neville, but he had sworn to Dumbledore that he would not tell anyone Neville's secret. Even Neville did not know Harry knew. **

**Harry, Ron and Hermione took their usual seats at the back of the class, pulled out parchment, quills and their copies of One**** Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi****. The class around them was whispering about what Neville had just done, but when Snape closed the dungeon door with an echoing bang, everybody immediately fell silent. **

'**You will notice,' said Snape, in his low, sneering voice, 'that we have a guest with us today.'**

**He gestured towards the dim corner of the dungeon and Harry saw Professor Umbridge sitting there, clipboard on her knee. He glanced sideways at Ron and Hermione, his eyebrows raised. Snape and Umbridge, the two teachers he hated most. It was hard to decide which one he wanted to triumph over the other. **

"Well, I think we'd like Snape to triumph," said Remus. "Snape can't like Umbridge, either, and at least his detentions don't involve the use of illegal items like blood quills."

'**We are continuing with our Strengthening Solution today. You will find your mixtures as you left them last lesson; if correctly made they should have matured well over the weekend - instructions -' he waved his wand again '- on the board. Carry on.' **

**Professor Umbridge spent the first half hour of the lesson making notes in her corner. Harry was very interested in hearing her question Snape; so interested, that he was becoming careless with his potion again. **

"That is not good," said Lily, groaning. "Snape will just give Harry a zero for the day and make him write an essay on what he did wrong. Why can't Snape remember that Harry's my son as well as James's?"

'**Salamander blood, Harry!' Hermione moaned, grabbing his wrist to prevent him adding the wrong ingredient for the third time, 'not pomegranate juice!' **

**'Right,' said Harry vaguely, putting down the bottle and continuing to watch the corner. Umbridge had just got to her feet. 'Ha,' he said softly, as she strode between two lines of desks towards Snape, who was bending over Dean Thomas's cauldron. **

**'Well, the class seem fairly advanced for their level,' she said briskly to Snape's back. 'Though I would question whether it is advisable to teach them a potion like the Strengthening Solution. I think the Ministry would prefer it if that was removed from the syllabus.'**

"I don't think Snape will appreciate her interfering with his lesson plan," said Remus.

**Snape straightened up slowly and turned to look at her. **

**'Now… how long have you been teaching at Hogwarts?' she asked, her quill poised over her clipboard. **

'**Fourteen years,' Snape replied. His expression was unfathomable. Harry, watching him closely, added a few drops to his potion; it hissed menacingly and turned from turquoise to orange. **

"Is it supposed to do that?" asked Peter.

Sirius shrugged. "I don't exactly recall what color the Strengthening Solution's supposed to be."

"It's not supposed to turn orange," said Lily. "It's supposed to be-"

"We don't need a Potions lesson right now," said James hastily. "Peter, keep reading."

'**You applied first for the Defence Against the Dark Arts post, I believe?' Professor Umbridge asked Snape. **

'**Yes,' said Snape quietly. **

'**But you were unsuccessful?' **

**Snape's lip curled. ****'Obviously.' **

**Professor Umbridge scribbled on her clipboard. **

'**And you have applied regularly for the Defence Against the Dark Arts post since you first joined the school, I believe?' **

'**Yes,' said Snape quietly, barely moving his lips. He looked very angry. **

"He should be," said Sirius. "Though is he mad at Umbitch or at the question?"

"Probably both," answered Remus.

'**Do you have any idea why Dumbledore has consistently refused to appoint you?' asked Umbridge. **

'**I suggest you ask him,' said Snape jerkily. **

**'Oh, I shall,' said Professor Umbridge, with a sweet smile. **

'**I suppose this is relevant?' Snape asked, his black eyes narrowed. **

'**Oh yes,' said Professor Umbridge, 'yes, the Ministry wants a thorough understanding of teachers' - er - backgrounds.' **

**She turned away, walked over to Pansy Parkinson and began questioning her about the lessons. Snape looked round at Harry and their eyes met for a second. Harry hastily dropped his gaze to his potion, which was now congealing foully and giving off a strong smell of burned rubber. **

'**No marks again, then, Potter,' said Snape maliciously, emptying Harry's cauldron with a wave of his wand. 'You will write me an essay on the correct composition of this potion, indicating how and why you went wrong, to be handed in next lesson, do you understand?' **

"That's completely unfair!" protested Lily. Sirius added to his Snape list.

**'Yes,' said Harry furiously. Snape had already given them homework and he had Quidditch practice this evening; this would mean another couple of sleepless nights. It did not seem possible that he had awoken that morning feeling very happy. All he felt now was a fervent desire for this day to end. **

'**Maybe I'll skive off Divination,' he said glumly, as they stood in the courtyard after lunch, the wind whipping at the hems of robes and brims of hats. 'I'll pretend to be ill and do Snape's essay instead, then I won't have to stay up half the night.' **

'**You can't skive off Divination,' said Hermione severely. **

"Why not?" asked James. "It's a stupid class."

'**Hark who's talking, you walked out of Divination, you hate Trelawney!' said Ron indignantly. **

'**I don't hate her,' said Hermione loftily. 'I just think she's an absolutely appalling teacher and a real old fraud. But Harry's already missed History of Magic and I don't think he ought to miss anything else today!' **

**There was too much truth in this to ignore, so half an hour later Harry took his seat in the hot, overperfumed atmosphere of the Divination classroom, feeling angry with everybody. Professor Trelawney was yet again handing out copies of **_**The**_** _Dream Oracle_****. Harry thought he'd surely be much better employed doing Snape's punishment essay than sitting here trying to find meaning in a lot of made-up dreams. **

"I agree," said Peter.

**It seemed, however, that he was not the only person in Divination who was in a temper. Professor Trelawney slammed a copy of the _Oracle_ down on the table between Harry and Ron and swept away, her lips pursed; she threw the next copy of the _Oracle_ at Seamus and Dean, narrowly avoiding Seamus's head, and thrust the final one into Neville's chest with such force that he slipped off his pouffe. **

**'Well, carry on!' said Professor Trelawney loudly, her voice high-pitched and somewhat hysterical, 'you know what to do! Or am I such a sub-standard teacher that you have never learned how to open a book?' **

"Why is Trelawney acting like this?" asked Peter, confused.

"I think she got the results of her inspection back," replied Lily.

**The class stared perplexedly at her, then at each other. Harry, however, thought he knew what was the matter. As Professor Trelawney flounced back to the high-backed teacher's chair, her magnified eyes full of angry tears, he leaned his head closer to Ron's and muttered, 'I think she's got the results of her inspection back.' **

**'Professor?' said Parvati Patil in a hushed voice (she and Lavender had always rather admired Professor Trelawney). 'Professor, is there anything - er - wrong?' **

**'Wrong!' cried Professor Trelawney in a voice throbbing with emotion. 'Certainly not! I have been insulted, certainly… insinuations have been made against me… unfounded accusations levelled… but no, there is nothing wrong, certainly not!' **

"Yes, it looks as if she did get the results back," said Lily, shaking her head and looking sympathetic.

**She took a great shuddering breath and looked away from Parvati, angry tears spilling from under her glasses. **

'**I say nothing,' she choked, 'of sixteen years of devoted service… it has passed, apparently, unnoticed… but I shall not be insulted, no, I shall not!' **

**'But, Professor, who's insulting you?' asked Parvati timidly. **

'**The Establishment!' said Professor Trelawney, in a deep, dramatic, wavering voice. 'Yes, those with eyes too clouded by the mundane to See as I See, to Know as I Know… of course, we Seers have always been feared, always persecuted… it is - alas - our fate.' **

**She gulped, dabbed at her wet cheeks with the end of her shawl, then she pulled a small embroidered handkerchief from her sleeve, and blew her nose very hard with a sound like Peeves blowing a raspberry. ****Ron sniggered. Lavender shot him a disgusted look. **

**'Professor,' said Parvati, 'do you mean… is it something Professor Umbridge -?'**

'**Do not speak to me about that woman!' cried Professor Trelawney, leaping to her feet, her beads rattling and her spectacles flashing. 'Kindly continue with your work!' **

"That - that - b$#rd!" burst out Sirius. He grabbed his Umbridge list and hurriedly added to it.

**And she spent the rest of the lesson striding among them, tears still leaking from behind her glasses, muttering what sounded like threats under her breath. **

**'… May well choose to leave… the indignity of it… on probation… we shall see… how she dares…' **

'**You and Umbridge have got something in common,' Harry told Hermione quietly when they met again in Defence Against the Dark Arts. 'She obviously reckons Trelawney's an old fraud, too… looks like she's put her on probation.' **

"Just because Trelawney's a fraud doesn't mean she deserves probation!" cried Lily indignantly. The others nodded in agreement.

**Umbridge entered the room as he spoke, wearing her black velvet bow and an expression of great smugness. **

'**Good afternoon, class.' **

'**Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge,' they chanted dully. **

'**Wands away, please.' **

**But there was no answering flurry of movement this time; nobody had bothered to take out their wands. **

**"Please turn to page thirty-four of ****_Defensive Magical Theory_**** and read the third chapter, entitled 'The Case for Non-Offensive Responses to Magical Attack'. There will be -" **

**'- No need to talk,' Harry, Ron and Hermione said together, under their breaths. **

'**No Quidditch practice,' said Angelina in hollow tones when Harry, Ron and Hermione entered the common room after dinner that night. **

"But Harry kept his temper and never said anything to Umb!tch!" protested James, looking horrified.

'**But I kept my temper!' said Harry, horrified. 'I didn't say anything to her, Angelina, I swear, I -'**

'**I know, I know,' said Angelina miserably. 'She just said she needed a bit of time to consider.' **

'**Consider what?' said Ron angrily. 'She's given the Slytherins permission, why not us?' **

**But Harry could imagine how much Umbridge was enjoying holding the threat of no Gryffindor Quidditch team over their heads and could easily understand why she would not want to relinquish that weapon over them too soon. **

"Go to Dumbledore about this," said Remus. "He's the Headmaster and will be able to overrule whatever Umb!tch does."

**'Well,' said Hermione, 'look on the bright side - at least now you'll have time to do Snape's essay!' **

"That's not a bright side!" snapped Sirius.

'**That's a bright side, is it?' snapped Harry, while Ron stared incredulously at Hermione. 'No Quidditch practice, and extra Potions?' **

**Harry slumped down into a chair, dragged his Potions essay reluctantly from his bag and set to work. It was very hard to concentrate; even though he knew Sirius was not due in the fire until much later, he could not help glancing into the flames every few minutes just in case. There was also an incredible amount of noise in the room: Fred and George appeared finally to have perfected one type of Skiving Snackbox, which they were taking turns to demonstrate to a cheering and whooping crowd. **

"I wonder which one they perfected," said James, looking interested.

**First, Fred would take a bite out of the orange end of a chew, at which he would vomit spectacularly into a bucket they had placed in front of them. Then he would force down the purple end of the chew, at which the vomiting would immediately cease. Lee Jordan, who was assisting the demonstration, was lazily Vanishing the vomit at regular intervals with the same Vanishing Spell Snape kept using on Harry's potions. **

"Wow," said Peter. "They've actually succeeded. I wish we could have them here."

**What with the regular sounds of retching, cheering and the sound of Fred and George taking advance orders from the crowd, Harry was finding it exceptionally difficult to focus on the correct method for Strengthening Solution. Hermione was not helping matters; the cheers and the sound of vomit hitting the bottom of Fred and George's bucket were punctuated by her loud and disapproving sniffs, which Harry found, if anything, more distracting. **

'**Just go and stop them, then!' he said irritably, after crossing out the wrong weight of powdered griffin claw for the fourth time. **

"I think if Hermione could, she would have already," said Remus.

'**I can't, they're not **_**technically**_** doing anything wrong,' said Hermione through gritted teeth. 'They're quite within their rights to eat the foul things themselves and I can't find a rule that says the other idiots aren't entitled to buy them, not unless they're proven to be dangerous in some way and it doesn't look as though they are.' **

**She, Harry and Ron watched George projectile-vomit into the bucket, gulp down the rest of the chew and straighten up, beaming with his arms wide to protracted applause. **

'**You know, I don't get why Fred and George only got three OWLs each,' said Harry, watching as Fred, George and Lee collected gold from the eager crowd. 'They really know their stuff.' **

**'Oh, they only know flashy stuff that's of no real use to anyone,' said Hermione disparagingly. **

'**No real use?' said Ron in a strained voice. 'Hermione, they've made about twenty-six Galleons already.' **

"Really?" exclaimed James and Sirius at the same time. They looked intrigued.

**It was a long while before the crowd around the Weasley twins dispersed, then Fred, Lee and George sat up counting their takings even longer, so it was well past midnight when Harry, Ron and Hermione finally had the common room to themselves. At long last, Fred had closed the doorway to the boys' dormitories behind him, rattling his box of Galleons ostentatiously so that Hermione scowled. Harry, who was making very little progress with his Potions essay, decided to give it up for the night. As he put his books away, Ron, who was dozing lightly in an armchair, gave a muffled grunt, awoke, and looked blearily into the fire. **

**'Sirius!' he said. **

"Yay, I'm there!" cheered Sirius.

**Harry whipped round. Sirius's untidy dark head was sitting in the fire again. **

**'Hi,' he said, grinning. **

'**Hi,' chorused Harry, Ron and Hermione, all three kneeling down on the hearthrug. Crookshanks purred loudly and approached the fire, trying, despite the heat, to put his face close to Sirius's. **

'**How're things?' said Sirius. **

'**Not that good,' said Harry, as Hermione pulled Crookshanks back to stop him singeing his whiskers. 'The Ministry's forced through another decree, which means we're not allowed to have Quidditch teams -' **

'**Or secret Defence Against the Dark Arts groups?' said Sirius. **

"The others turned to look at Sirius. "How did you know about that?" demanded Lily.

"Maybe an Order member was at the Hog's Head and overheard," suggested Remus.

**There was a short pause. **

'**How did you know about that?' Harry demanded. **

'**You want to choose your meeting places more carefully,' said Sirius, grinning still more broadly. 'The Hog's Head, I ask you.' **

**'Well, it was better than the Three Broomsticks!' said Hermione defensively. **

"It was not better," said James, shaking his head.

**'That's always packed with people-' **

'**Which means you'd have been harder to overhear,' said Sirius. 'You've got a lot to learn, Hermione.' **

'**Who overheard us?' Harry demanded. **

**'Mundungus, of course,' **

"Mundungus was there?" asked Peter. "But wouldn't they have seen him?"

**said Sirius, and when they all looked puzzled he laughed. 'He was the witch under the veil.' **

**'That was Mundungus?' Harry said, stunned. 'What was he doing in the Hog's Head?' **

"Probably keeping an eye on Harry," muttered Remus.

**'What do you think he was doing?' said Sirius impatiently. 'Keeping an eye on you, of course.' **

'**I'm still being followed?' asked Harry angrily. **

**'Yeah, you are,' said Sirius, 'and just as well, isn't it, if the first thing you're going to do on your weekend off is organise an illegal defence group.' **

**But he looked neither angry nor worried. On the contrary, he was looking at Harry with distinct pride. **

"Of course I would be," said Sirius. "I like what you're doing."

'**Why was Dung hiding from us?' asked Ron, sounding disappointed. 'We'd've liked to've seen him.' **

'**He was banned from the Hog's Head twenty years ago,' said Sirius, 'and that barman's got a long memory. We lost Moody's spare Invisibility Cloak when Sturgis was arrested, so Dung's been dressing as a witch a lot lately… anyway… first of all, Ron - I've sworn to pass on a message from your mother.' **

'**Oh yeah?' said Ron, sounding apprehensive. **

"She'll no doubt tell Ron he's not to take part and ask that Harry and Hermione do the same," said James sourly.

'**She says on no account whatsoever are you to take part in an illegal secret Defence Against the Dark Arts group. She says you'll be expelled for sure and your future will be ruined. She says there will be plenty of time to learn how to defend yourself later and that you are too young to be worrying about that right now. She also' (Sirius's eyes turned to the other two) 'advises Harry and Hermione not to proceed with the group, though she accepts that she has no authority over either of them and simply begs them to remember that she has their best interests at heart. She would have written all this to you, but if the owl had been intercepted you'd all have been in real trouble, and she can't say it for herself because she's on duty tonight.' **

'**On duty doing what?' said Ron quickly. **

'**Never you mind, just stuff for the Order,' said Sirius. 'So it's fallen to me to be the messenger and make sure you tell her I passed it all on, because I don't think she trusts me to.' **

**There was another pause in which Crookshanks, mewing, attempted to paw Sirius's head, and Ron fiddled with a hole in the hearthrug. **

**'So, you want me to say I'm not going to take part in the Defence group?' he muttered finally. **

"Of course not!" exclaimed Sirius. "I want you to do it! You need to be able to defend yourself agaisnt Death Eaters and Moldywart."

**'Me? Certainly not!' said Sirius, looking surprised. 'I think it's an excellent idea!' **

'**You do?' said Harry, his heart lifting. **

'**Of course I do!' said Sirius. 'D'you think your father and I would've lain down and taken orders from an old hag like Umbridge?' **

"We wouldn't," said James flatly.

**'But - last term all you did was tell me to be careful and not take risks -' **

'**Last year, all the evidence was that someone inside Hogwarts was trying to kill you, Harry!' said Sirius impatiently. 'This year, we know there's someone outside Hogwarts who'd like to kill us all, so I think learning to defend yourselves properly is a very good idea!' **

'**And if we do get expelled?' Hermione asked, a quizzical look on her face. **

"But the whole thing was your idea, Hermione!" said Peter.

**'Hermione, this whole thing was your idea!' said Harry, staring at her. **

'**I know it was. I just wondered what Sirius thought,' she said, shrugging. **

**'Well, better expelled and able to defend yourselves than sitting safely in school without a clue,' said Sirius. **

"Quite right," said Lily briskly.

**'Hear, hear,' said Harry and Ron enthusiastically. **

**'So,' said Sirius, 'how are you organising this group? Where are you meeting?' **

**'Well, that's a bit of a problem now,' said Harry. 'Dunno where we're going to be able to go.' **

"The Room of Requirement," said Sirius at once. "Future self, please suggest it."

'**How about the Shrieking Shack?' suggested Sirius. **

"I guess it could work," said James.

"No it won't," snapped Remus. "It's only us Marauders meeting there and the four of us can fit under a single Invisibility cloak, particularly when Peter's in rat form. If twenty-eight students tried to meet there, it just wouldn't work."

**'Hey, that's an idea!' said Ron excitedly, but Hermione made a sceptical noise and all three of them looked at her, Sirius's head turning in the flames. **

**'Well, Sirius, it's just that there were only four of you meeting in the Shrieking Shack when you were at school,' said Hermione, 'and all of you could transform into animals and I suppose you could all have squeezed under a single Invisibility Cloak if you'd wanted to. But there are twenty-eight of us and none of us is an Animagus, so we wouldn't need so much an Invisibility Cloak as an Invisibility Marquee -' **

"Exactly!" exclaimed Remus.

'**Fair point,' said Sirius, looking slightly crestfallen. 'Well, I'm sure you'll come up with somewhere. There used to be a pretty roomy secret passageway behind that big mirror on the fourth floor, you might have enough space to practise jinxes in there.' **

'**Fred and George told me it's blocked,' said Harry, shaking his head. 'Caved in or something.' **

**'Oh…' said Sirius, frowning. **

"Why doesn't my future self remember the Room of Requirement and suggest it?" demanded Sirius impatiently.

**'Well, I'll have a think and get back to -' He broke off. His face was suddenly tense, alarmed. He turned sideways, apparently looking into the solid brick wall of the fireplace. **

**'Sirius?' said Harry anxiously. **

**But he had vanished.**

"I guess you heard someone coming and left, Sirius," said Lily.

**Harry gaped at the flames for a moment, then turned to look at Ron and Hermione. **

**'Why did he -?' **

**Hermione gave a horrified gasp and leapt to her feet, still staring at the fire. A hand had appeared amongst the flames, groping as though to catch hold of something; a stubby, short-fingered hand covered in ugly old-fashioned rings. **

"Oh no," they moaned.

"Umb!tch's been policing the fireplaces," said Peter dismally. "This is not good."

**The three of them ran for it. At the door of the boys' dormitory Harry looked back. Umbridge's hand was still making snatching movements amongst the flames, as though she knew exactly where Sirius's hair had been moments before and was determined to seize it. **

"That was a close call," said Sirius, shuddering. "If she'd caught me, I would be back to Azkaban for sure."

"Well, it looks like you won't be talking to Harry until the Christmas holidays," said James. "Here, I'll read next." He took the book from Peter.


	18. Dumbledore's Army

This chapter is dedicated to one of my reviewers, Zeropolis79.

— **CHAPTER EIGHTEEN — **

**Dumbledore's Army**

"Dumbledore's Army?" asked Peter. "Did Dumbledore really form an army?"

"I think it's more likely that it's the name of the secret Defence group," said James.

**'Umbridge has been reading your mail, Harry. There's no other explanation.' **

"I guess," said Sirius. "But how would she know that the note meant that I was meeting Harry via Floo?"

"Anyone reading it would have figured out that a meeting was being arranged," said Lily. "From there, the reader could work out what kind of meeting it was."

**'You think Umbridge attacked Hedwig?' he said, outraged. **

"She probably did," said Remus sourly. Sirius added to his list.

**'I'm almost certain of it,' said Hermione grimly. 'Watch your frog, it's escaping.' **

**Harry pointed his wand at the bullfrog that had been hopping hopefully towards the other side of the table - '****Accio!****' - ****and it zoomed gloomily back into his hand. **

**Charms was always one of the best lessons in which to enjoy a private chat; there was generally so much movement and activity that the danger of being overheard was very slight. Today, with the room full of croaking bullfrogs and cawing ravens, and with a heavy downpour of rain clattering and pounding against the classroom windows, Harry, Ron and Hermione's whispered discussion about how Umbridge had nearly caught Sirius went quite unnoticed. **

'**I've been suspecting this ever since Filch accused you of ordering Dungbombs, because it seemed such a stupid lie,' Hermione whispered.**

"Yeah, it was a stupid lie," said James, frowning. "It's like something Sirius comes up with whenever McGonagall catches us out of bounds." Sirius pouted, but was silent.

'**I mean, once your letter had been read it would have been quite clear you ****weren't**** ordering them, so you wouldn't have been in trouble at all - it's a bit of a feeble joke, isn't it? But then I thought, what if somebody just wanted an excuse to read your mail? Well then, it would be a perfect way for Umbridge to manage it – tip off Filch, let him do the dirty work and confiscate the letter, then either find a way of stealing it from him or else demand to see it – I don't think Filch would object, when's he ever stuck up for a student's rights? Harry, you're squashing your frog.' **

**Harry looked down; he was indeed squeezing his bullfrog so tightly its eyes were popping; he replaced it hastily upon the desk. **

'**It was a very, very close call last night,' said Hermione. 'I just wonder if Umbridge knows how close it was. ****Silencio**

"I bet the b!tch does," said Sirius bitterly, adding to his list. "Now I can't speak with the trio anymore."

**The bullfrog on which she was practising her Silencing Charm was struck dumb mid-croak and glared at her reproachfully. **

'**If she'd caught Snuffles -' **

"Sirius would either be back in Azkaban or have underwent the Dementor's Kiss," said Peter, shuddering.

**Harry finished the sentence for her. **

**'- He'd probably be back in Azkaban this morning.' He waved his wand without really concentrating; his bullfrog swelled like a green balloon and emitted a high-pitched whistle. **

"Does the author need to make always show how Harry isn't as good at Charms as I am?" asked Lily.

**Silencio****!' said Hermione hastily, pointing her wand at Harry's frog, which deflated silently before them. 'Well, he mustn't do it again, that's all. I just don't know how we're going to let him know. We can't send him an owl.' **

"Sirius isn't stupid," said Remus. "He's not going to risk talking with you again."

'**I don't reckon he'll risk it again,' said Ron. 'He's not stupid; he knows she nearly got him. ****Silencio**

"Yeah," said Sirius. "I'm not stupid. My future self isn't going to meet with you again. At least until nobody like Umb!tch is watching the Floo Network anymore."

**The large and ugly raven in front of him let out a derisive caw. **

**'Silencio. SILENCIO!'**** The raven cawed more loudly. **

'**It's the way you're moving your wand,' said Hermione, watching Ron critically, 'you don't want to wave it, it's more a sharp****jab**

'**Ravens are harder than frogs,' said Ron through clenched teeth. **

**'Fine, let's swap,' said Hermione, seizing Ron's raven and replacing it with her own fat bullfrog. '****Silencio****!' The raven continued to open and close its sharp beak, but no sound came out. **

"And of course, Hermione is going to master the charm," said Peter.

'**Very good, Miss Granger!' said Professor Flitwick's squeaky little voice, making Harry, Ron and Hermione all jump. 'Now, let me see you try, Mr. Weasley.' **

**'Wha—? Oh - oh, right,' said Ron, very flustered. 'Er - silencio!' **

**He jabbed at the bullfrog so hard he poked it in the eye: the frog gave a deafening croak and leapt off the desk. **

**It came as no surprise to any of them that Harry and Ron were given additional practice of the Silencing Charm for homework. **

"Oh great, Harry has even more work," groaned James. "His OWL year is worse than mine. At least I never had to do extra work, because I was able to master the spells."

**They were allowed to remain inside over break due to the downpour outside. They found seats in a noisy and overcrowded classroom on the first floor in which Peeves was floating dreamily up near the chandelier, occasionally blowing an ink pellet at the top of somebody's head. **

"Why did they decide to be in the same room as Peeves?" asked Remus. "Couldn't they have picked a different one?"

"Maybe it was the only one students could use," suggested Lily.

**They had barely sat down when Angelina came struggling towards them through the groups of gossiping students. **

'**I've got permission!' she said. 'To reform the Quidditch team!' **

They all cheered, even Lily. "This is great!' exclaimed James.

**Excellent****!' said Ron and Harry together. **

**'Yeah,' said Angelina, beaming. 'I went to McGonagall and I think she might have appealed to Dumbledore. Anyway, Umbridge had to give in. Ha! So I want you down at the pitch at seven o'clock tonight, all right, because we've got to make up time. You realise we're only three weeks away from our first match?' **

"Ha ha!" laughed Sirius. "Umb!tch might be High Inquisitor, but Dumbledore still has more power over her!"

**She squeezed away from them, narrowly dodged an ink pellet from Peeves, which hit a nearby first-year instead, and vanished from sight. **

**Ron's smile slipped slightly as he looked out of the window, which was now opaque with hammering rain. **

Remus winced. "Quidditch practice in pouring rain. Not good."

'**Hope this clears up. What's up with you, Hermione?' **

**She, too, was gazing at the window, but not as though she really saw it. Her eyes were unfocused and there was a frown on her face. **

'**Just thinking…' she said, still frowning at the rain-washed window. **

'**About Siri— Snuffles?' said Harry. **

**'No… not exactly…' said Hermione slowly. 'More… wondering… I suppose we're doing the right thing… I think… aren't we?' **

"What is she talking about?" asked Peter, looking confused. The others shrugged in reply.

**Harry and Ron looked at each other. **

**'Well, that clears that up,' said Ron. 'It would've been really annoying if you hadn't explained yourself properly.' **

**Hermione looked at him as though she had only just realised he was there. **

'**I was just wondering,' she said, her voice stronger now, 'whether we're doing the right thing, starting this Defence Against the Dark Arts group.' **

"Yes you are!" they all exclaimed at once. "It's a great idea!"

**'What?' said Harry and Ron together? **

**'Hermione, it was your idea in the first place!' said Ron indignantly. **

'**I know,' said Hermione, twisting her fingers together. 'But after talking to Snuffles…'**

"But I'm all for it!" protested Sirius. "So you can go ahead and do it."

'**But he's all for it,' said Harry. **

**'Yes,' said Hermione, staring at the window again. 'Yes, that's what made me think maybe it wasn't a good idea after all…' **

"Oh, I see," said James. "Padfoot's for it, so you decide it's not a good idea, Hermione."

**Peeves floated over them on his stomach, peashooter at the ready; automatically all three of them lifted their bags to cover their heads until he had passed. **

'**Let's get this straight,' said Harry angrily, as they put their bags back on the floor, 'Sirius agrees with us, so you don't think we should do it any more?' **

**Hermione looked tense and rather miserable. Now staring at her own hands, she said, 'Do you honestly trust his judgement?' **

**'Yes, I do!' said Harry at once. 'He's always given us great advice!' **

"Yeah," said Sirius. "Ever since you've known me."

**An ink pellet whizzed past them, striking Katie Bell squarely in the ear. Hermione watched Katie leap to her feet and start throwing things at Peeves;**

"It's not going to get Peeves to stop blowing ink pellets at people," said Remus.

**it was a few moments before Hermione spoke again and it sounded as though she was choosing her words very carefully. **

**'You don't think he has become… sort of… reckless… since he's been cooped up in Grimmauld Place? You don't think he's… kind of… living through us?' **

**"What d'you mean, 'living through us'?" Harry retorted. **

**'I mean… well, I think he'd love to be forming secret Defence societies right under the nose of someone from the Ministry… I think he's really frustrated at how little he can do where he is… so I think he's keen to kind of… egg us on.' **

"Okay, Hermione's starting to sound like Molly," said James. "I suppose Padfoot would be a bit frustrated at being cooped up, but I doubt he'd be keen to egg you guys on as a result. It's something any of us Marauders would want to do."

**Ron looked utterly perplexed. **

'**Sirius is right,' he said, 'you ****do**** sound just like my mother.' **

**Hermione bit her lip and did not answer. The bell rang just as Peeves swooped down on Katie and emptied an entire inkbottle over her head. **

Lily sighed. "Throwing things at Peeves didn't help matters any."

**The weather did not improve as the day wore on, so that at seven o'clock that evening, when Harry and Ron went down to the Quidditch pitch for practice, they were soaked through within minutes, their feet slipping and sliding on the sodden grass. The sky was a deep, thundery grey and it was a relief to gain the warmth and light of the changing rooms, even if they knew the respite was only temporary. They found Fred and George debating whether to use one of their own Skiving Snackboxes to get out of flying. **

"You should," said Peter. "I don't like the idea of flying in this weather." To his surprise, James and Sirius agreed.

**'… But I bet she'd know what we'd done,' Fred said out of the corner of his mouth. 'If only I hadn't offered to sell her some Puking Pastilles yesterday.' **

'**We could try the Fever Fudge,' George muttered, 'no one's seen that yet -'**

'**Does it work?' enquired Ron hopefully, as the hammering of rain on the roof intensified and wind howled around the building. **

'Well, yeah,' said Fred, 'your temperature'll go right up.'

'**But you get these massive pus-filled boils, too,' said George, 'and we haven't worked out how to get rid of them yet.' **

They all made faces. "Ugh!" exclaimed Lily.

'**I can't see any boils,' said Ron, staring at the twins. **

**'No, well, you wouldn't,' said Fred darkly, 'they're not in a place we generally display to the public.' **

'**But they make sitting on a broom a right pain in the -' **

Sirius snickered. "So that's where the boils are."

'**All right, everyone, listen up,' said Angelina loudly, emerging from the Captain's office. 'I know it's not ideal weather, but there's a chance we'll be playing Slytherin in conditions like this so it's a good idea to work out how we're going to cope with them. Harry, didn't you do something to your glasses to stop the rain fogging them up when we played Hufflepuff in that storm?' **

"Actually, it was Hermione who did the spell," said Remus.

'**Hermione did it,' said Harry. He pulled out his wand, tapped his glasses and said, '****Impervius**

'**I think we all ought to try that,' said Angelina. 'If we could just keep the rain off our faces it would really help visibility - all together, come on - Impervius! OK. Let's go.' **

**They all stowed their wands back in the inside pockets of their robes, shouldered their brooms and followed Angelina out of the changing rooms. **

**They squelched through the deepening mud to the middle of the pitch; visibility was still very poor even with the Impervius Charm; light was fading fast and curtains of rain were sweeping the grounds. **

'**All right, on my whistle,' shouted Angelina. **

**Harry kicked off from the ground, spraying mud in all directions, and shot upwards, the wind pulling him slightly off course. **

**He had no idea how he was going to see the Snitch in this weather; he was having enough difficulty seeing the one Bludger with which they were practising; a minute into the practice it almost unseated him and he had to use the Sloth Grip Roll to avoid it. Unfortunately, Angelina did not see this. In fact, she did not appear to be able to see anything; none of them had a clue what the others were doing. The wind was picking up; even at a distance Harry could hear the swishing, pounding sounds of the rain pummelling the surface of the lake. **

"If the weather is this terrible, why bother even holding a practice?" asked Lily.

**Angelina kept them at it for nearly an hour before conceding defeat. She led her sodden and disgruntled team back into the changing rooms, insisting that the practice had not been a waste of time, though without any real conviction in her voice. Fred and George were looking particularly annoyed; both were bandy-legged and winced with every movement. **

"I take it they've had some of their Fever Fudges?" commented James.

**Harry could hear them complaining in low voices as he towelled his hair dry. **

'**I think a few of mine have ruptured,' said Fred in a hollow voice. **

'**Mine haven't,' said George, through clenched teeth, 'they're throbbing like mad… feel bigger if anything.'**

"Ick," said Sirius. "I feel sorry for them."

'**OUCH! ' said Harry. **

**He pressed the towel to his face, his eyes screwed tight with pain. The scar on his forehead had seared again, more painfully than it had in weeks. **

"So what emotion of Moldywart's are you feeling?" asked Peter. "His anger?"

'**What's up?' said several voices. **

**Harry emerged from behind his towel; the changing room was blurred because he was not wearing his glasses, but he could still tell that everyone's face was turned towards him. 'Nothing,' he muttered, 'I - poked myself in the eye, that's all.' But he gave Ron a significant look and the two of them hung back as the rest of the team filed back outside, muffled in their cloaks, their hats pulled low over their ears. **

'**What happened?' said Ron, the moment Alicia had disappeared through the door. 'Was it your scar?' Harry nodded. 'But…' looking scared, Ron strode across to the window and stared out into the rain, 'he - he can't be near us now, can he?' **

"No, it hurt because Harry was feeling his anger," said James.

**'No,' Harry muttered, sinking on to a bench and rubbing his forehead. 'He's probably miles away. It hurt because… he's… angry.' **

**Harry had not meant to say that at all, and heard the words as though a stranger had spoken them - yet knew at once that they were true. He did not know how he knew it, but he did; Voldemort, wherever he was, whatever he was doing, was in a towering temper. **

'**Did you see him?' said Ron, looking horrified. 'Did you… get a vision, or something?' **

**Harry sat quite still, staring at his feet, allowing his mind and his memory to relax in the aftermath of the pain. **

**A confused tangle of shapes, a howling rush of voices… **

'**He wants something done, and it's not happening fast enough,' he said. **

**Again, he felt surprised to hear the words coming out of his mouth, and yet was quite certain they were true. **

**'But… how do you know?' said Ron. **

"Harry has no idea how he knows," said Remus.

**Harry shook his head and covered his eyes with his hands, pressing down upon them with his palms. Little stars erupted in them. He felt Ron sit down on the bench beside him and knew Ron was staring at him. **

**"Is this what it was about last time?" said Ron in a hushed voice. 'When your scar hurt in Umbridge's office? You-Know-Who was angry?'**

**Harry shook his head. **

'**What is it, then?' **

**Harry was thinking himself back. He had been looking into Umbridge's face… his scar had hurt… and he had had that odd feeling in his stomach… a strange, leaping feeling… a **_**happy**_** feeling… but of course, he had not recognised it for what it was, as he had been feeling so miserable himself… **

"Voldemort was _happy_?" demanded Lily. "How horrible."

'**Last time, it was because he was pleased,' he said. 'Really pleased. He thought… something good was going to happen. And the night before we came back to Hogwarts…' he thought back to the moment when his scar had hurt so badly in his and Ron's bedroom in Grimmauld Place… 'He was furious.' **

"I wonder what he was furious about," said Peter.

**He looked round at Ron, who was gaping at him. **

'**You could take over from Trelawney, mate,' he said in an awed voice. **

'**I'm not making prophecies,' said Harry. **

**'No, you know what you're doing?' Ron said, sounding both scared and impressed. 'Harry, you're**** reading You-Know-Who's mind**

"It's sounds more like Harry's reading Moldywart's mood," said Lily.

**'No,' said Harry, shaking his head. 'It's more like… his mood, I suppose. I'm just getting flashes of what mood he's in. Dumbledore said something like this was happening last year. He said that when Voldemort was near me, or when he was feeling hatred, I could tell. Well, now I'm feeling it when he's pleased, too…'**

**There was a pause. The wind and rain lashed at the building. **

'**You've got to tell someone,' said Ron. **

"Harry has already told Dumbledore and me about it," said Sirius.

'**I told Sirius last time.' **

'**Well, tell him about this time!' **

**'Can't, can I?' said Harry grimly. 'Umbridge is watching the owls and the fires, remember?' **

'**Well then, Dumbledore.' **

'**I've just told you, he already knows,' said Harry shortly, getting to his feet, taking his cloak off his peg and swinging it around him. 'There's no point telling him again.' **

"It's only because Dumbledore's ignoring Harry that he's not wanting to tell Dumbledore," said Lily. "Harry, please forget about that speak to the Headmaster!"

**Ron did up the fastening of his own cloak, watching Harry thoughtfully. **

'**Dumbledore'd want to know,' he said.**

**Harry shrugged. **

**'C'mon… we've still got Silencing Charms to practise.' **

**They hurried back through the dark grounds, sliding and stumbling up the muddy lawns, not talking. Harry was thinking hard. What was it that Voldemort wanted done that was not happening quickly enough? '… ****He's got other plans… plans he can put into operation very quietly indeed… stuff he can only get by stealth… like a weapon. Something he didn't have last time**

"Well, it looks like Voldemort's not getting it as fast as he wants," remarked James.

**Harry had not thought about those words in weeks; he had been too absorbed in what was going on at Hogwarts, too busy dwelling on the ongoing battles with Umbridge, the injustice of all the Ministry interference… but now they came back to him and made him wonder…Voldemort's anger would make sense if he was no nearer to laying hands on the weapon, whatever it was. Had the Order thwarted him, stopped him from seizing it? Where was it kept? Who had it now? **

"Well, we're not going to find out anything soon," said Sirius.

'_**Mimbulus mimbletonia**_**,' said Ron's voice and Harry came back to his senses just in time to clamber through the portrait hole into the common room. **

**It appeared that Hermione had gone to bed early, leaving Crookshanks curled in a nearby chair and an assortment of knobbly knitted elf hats lying on a table by the fire. Harry was rather grateful that she was not around, because he did not much want to discuss his scar hurting and have her urge him to go to Dumbledore, too. Ron kept throwing him anxious glances, but Harry pulled out his Charms books and set to work on finishing his essay, though he was only pretending to concentrate and by the time Ron said he was going up to bed, too, he had written hardly anything. **

They exchanged looks and shook their heads in concern.

**Midnight came and went while Harry was reading and rereading a passage about the uses of scurvy-grass, lovage and sneezewort and not taking in a word of it. **

**These plantes are moste efficacious in the inflaming of the Braine, and are therefore much used in Confusing and Befuddlement Draughts, where the wizard is desirous of producing hot-headedness and recklessness…**

… **Hermione said Sirius was becoming reckless cooped up in Grimmauld Place… **

… **moste efficacious in the inflaming of the braine, and are therefore much used****…**

… **The****Daily Prophet**** would think his brain was inflamed if they found out that he knew what Voldemort was feeling… **

… **Therefore much used in Confusing and Befuddlement Draughts****…**

… **Confusing was the word, all right; ****why**** did he know what Voldemort was feeling? What was this weird connection between them, which Dumbledore had never been able to explain satisfactorily? **

"We don't know either," said Remus. "Just that when Voldemort gave you the scar, Harry, he somehow transferred some of his power to you and made the connection."

… **Where the wizard is desirous****… **

… **How Harry would like to sleep…**

…**Of producing hot-headedness…**

… **It was warm and comfortable in his armchair before the fire, with the rain still beating heavily on the windowpanes, Crookshanks purring, and the crackling of the flames… **

**The book slipped from Harry's slack grip and landed with a dull thud on the hearthrug. His head lolled sideways… **

**He was walking once more along a windowless corridor, his footsteps echoing in the silence. As the door at the end of the passage loomed larger, his heart beat fast with excitement… if he could only open it… enter beyond… **

"Okay, why is Harry getting this dream again?" asked Peter. The others shrugged.

**He stretched out his hand… his fingertips were inches from it… **

'**Harry Potter, sir!' **

"Who's there?" asked Sirius.

"There's only one person that calls Harry by his first and last name and adds sir," answered Remus. "That person is Dobby, so it stands to reason that Dobby's there."

**He awoke with a start. The candles had all been extinguished in the common room, but there was something moving close by. **

**'Whozair?' said Harry, sitting upright in his chair. The fire was almost out, the room very dark. **

'**Dobby has your owl, sir!' said a squeaky voice. **

"See?" asked Remus. "I was right."

**'Dobby?' said Harry thickly, peering through the gloom towards the source of the voice.**

**Dobby the house-elf was standing beside the table on which Hermione had left half a dozen of her knitted hats. His large, pointed ears were now sticking out from beneath what looked like all the hats Hermione had ever knitted; he was wearing one on top of the other, so that his head seemed elongated by two or three feet,**

"So that's where all the hats Hermione knitted have gone!" exclaimed Lily. "Dobby's been taking them and wearing them."

**and on the very topmost bobble sat Hedwig, hooting serenely and obviously cured. **

'**Dobby volunteered to return Harry Potter's owl,' said the elf squeakily, with a look of positive adoration on his face. 'Professor Grubbly-Plank says she is all well now, sir.' He sank into a deep bow so that his pencil-like nose brushed the threadbare surface of the hearthrug and Hedwig gave an indignant hoot and fluttered on to the arm of Harry's chair. **

**'Thanks, Dobby!' said Harry, stroking Hedwig's head and blinking hard, trying to rid himself of the image of the door in his dream… it had been very vivid. Surveying Dobby more closely, he noticed that the elf was also wearing several scarves and innumerable socks, so that his feet looked far too big for his body. **

"So Dobby has been taking all the clothes that Hermione has left out?" said James. "Well, the other house elves wouldn't want them."

**'Er… have you been taking all the clothes Hermione's been leaving out?' **

**'Oh, no, sir,' said Dobby happily. 'Dobby has been taking some for Winky, too, sir.' **

**'Yeah, how is Winky?' asked Harry. **

**Dobby's ears drooped slightly. **

**'Winky is still drinking lots, sir,' he said sadly, his enormous round green eyes, large as tennis balls, downcast. 'She still does not care for clothes, Harry Potter. Nor do the other house-elves. None of them will clean Gryffindor Tower any more, not with the hats and socks hidden everywhere, they finds them insulting, sir. Dobby does it all himself, sir, but Dobby does not mind, sir, for he always hopes to meet Harry Potter and tonight, sir, he has got his wish!' **

"Well, Hermione's plan to free house-elves backfired," said Remus. "Not that it worked to begin with, because she's not their owner. All it did was push the work onto Dobby."

**Dobby sank into a deep bow again. 'But Harry Potter does not seem happy,' Dobby went on, straightening up again and looking timidly at Harry. 'Dobby heard him muttering in his sleep. Was Harry Potter having bad dreams?' **

'**Not really bad,' said Harry, yawning and rubbing his eyes. 'I've had worse.'**

**The elf surveyed Harry out of his vast, orb-like eyes. Then he said very seriously, his ears drooping, 'Dobby wishes he could help Harry Potter, for Harry Potter set Dobby free and Dobby is much, much happier now.' **

"I'm sure Dobby will find some way to help Harry," said James. "He did with the gillyweed, even if the fake Moody did arrange it that way."

**Harry smiled. 'You can't help me, Dobby, but thanks for the offer.' **

**He bent and picked up his Potions book. He'd have to try to finish the essay tomorrow. He closed the book and as he did so the firelight illuminated the thin white scars on the back of his hand - the result of his detentions with Umbridge… **

'**Wait a moment - there is something you can do for me, Dobby,' said Harry slowly. **

"I think Harry's going to ask Dobby if he knows someplace where the Defence group can meet without being found!" exclaimed Lily.

"I hope Dobby knows about the Room of Requirement," said Peter.

"If the other house-elves have told him about it, he will," said Sirius. "Remember? One of the house-elves told us about the room when we asked about it. It appeared when we needed it, but we couldn't find it again, so we asked the house-elves about it."

**The elf looked round, beaming. **

'**Name it, Harry Potter, sir!' **

'**I need to find a place where twenty-eight people can practise Defence Against the Dark Arts without being discovered by any of the teachers. Especially,' Harry clenched his hand on the book, so that the scars shone pearly white, 'Professor Umbridge.' **

**He expected the elf's smile to vanish, his ears to droop; he expected him to say it was impossible, or else that he would try to find somewhere, but his hopes were not high. What he had not expected was for Dobby to give a little skip, his ears waggling cheerfully, and clap his hands together. **

'**Dobby knows the perfect place, sir!' he said happily. 'Dobby heard tell of it from the other house-elves when he came to Hogwarts, sir. It is known by us as the Come and Go Room, sir, or else as the Room of Requirement!' **

"YES!" cheered James and Sirius.

"This is great!" exclaimed Lily. "Harry's found out about the Room of Requirement."

'**Why?' said Harry curiously. **

'**Because it is a room that a person can only enter,' said Dobby seriously, 'when they have real need of it. Sometimes it is there, and sometimes it is not, but when it appears, it is always equipped for the seeker's needs. Dobby has used it, sir,' said the elf, dropping his voice and looking guilty, 'when Winky has been very drunk; he has hidden her in the Room of Requirement and he has found antidotes to Butterbeer there, and a nice elf-sized bed to settle her on while she sleeps it off, sir… and Dobby knows Mr. Filch has found extra cleaning materials there when he has run short, sir, and –'**

'**And if you really needed a bathroom,' said Harry, suddenly remembering something Dumbledore had said at the Yule Ball the previous Christmas, 'would it fill itself with chamber pots?' **

"It probably would," said Remus. "Well, that explains Dumbledore's remark."

**'Dobby expects so, sir,' said Dobby, nodding earnestly. 'It is a most amazing room, sir.' **

**'How many people know about it?' said Harry, sitting up straighter in his chair. 'Very few, sir. Mostly people stumbles across it when they needs it, sir, but often they never finds it again, for they do not know that it is always there waiting to be called into service, sir.' **

"It's the perfect place," said Peter. "Umbridge won't find out unless someone tells her, so you'll be safe practicing Defence Against Dark Arts there."

**'It sounds brilliant,' said Harry, his heart racing. 'It sounds perfect, Dobby. When can you show me where it is?' **

**'Any time, Harry Potter, sir,' said Dobby, looking delighted at Harry's enthusiasm. 'We could go now, if you like!' **

**For a moment Harry was tempted to go with Dobby. He was halfway out of his seat, intending to hurry upstairs for his Invisibility Cloak when, not for the first time, a voice very much like Hermione's whispered in his ear: ****reckless****. It was, after all, very late, he was exhausted, and had Snape's essay to finish. **

"Aw," whined Sirius. "I wish Harry would do and see it now."

**'Not tonight, Dobby,' said Harry reluctantly, sinking back into his chair. 'This is really important… I don't want to blow it, it'll need proper planning. Listen, can you just tell me exactly where this Room of Requirement is, and how to get in there?' **

**Their robes billowed and swirled around them as they splashed across the flooded vegetable patch to double Herbology, where they could hardly hear what Professor Sprout was saying over the hammering of raindrops hard as hailstones on the greenhouse roof. The afternoon's Care of Magical Creatures lesson was to be relocated from the storm-swept grounds to a free classroom on the ground floor and, to their intense relief, Angelina had sought out her team at lunch to tell them that Quidditch practice was cancelled. **

"That's good," said James. "Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff won't be practicing either, so they can hold the first meeting that night."

'Good,' said Harry quietly, when she told him, 'because we've found somewhere to have our first Defence meeting. Tonight, eight o'clock, seventh floor opposite that tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy being clubbed by those trolls. Can you tell Katie and Alicia?'

**She looked slightly taken aback but promised to tell the others. Harry returned hungrily to his sausages and mash. When he looked up to take a drink of pumpkin juice, he found Hermione watching him. **

'What?' he said thickly.

**'Well… it's just that Dobby's plans aren't always that safe. Don't you remember when he lost you all the bones in your arm?' **

"True, but the Room of Requirement is perfectly safe!" protested Peter. "We're here now."

'**This room isn't just some mad idea of Dobby's; Dumbledore knows about it, too, he mentioned it to me at the Yule Ball.' **

**Hermione's expression cleared.**

**'Dumbledore told you about it?' **

**'Just in passing,' said Harry, shrugging. **

**'Oh, well, that's all right then,' said Hermione briskly and raised no more objections. **

"Well, she wouldn't once she heard that Dumbledore mentioned it," commented Remus.

**Together with Ron they had spent most of the day seeking out those people who had signed their names to the list in the Hog's Head and telling them where to meet that evening. Somewhat to Harry's disappointment, it was Ginny who managed to find Cho Chang and her friend first; however, by the end of dinner he was confident that the news had been passed to every one of the twenty-five people who had turned up in the Hog's Head. **

**At half past seven Harry, Ron and Hermione left the Gryffindor common room, Harry clutching a certain piece of aged parchment in his hand. **

"Our Map!" exclaimed the Marauders at the same time, grinning widely.

**Fifth-years were allowed to be out in the corridors until nine o'clock, but all three of them kept looking around nervously as they made their way along the seventh floor. **

"If you keep that up, it'll just prove to others that you're up to something," said James. "Us Marauders never act like that just before we're about to pull a prank."

'**Hold it,' Harry warned, unfolding the piece of parchment at the top of the last staircase, tapping it with his wand and muttering, '**_**I**_**solemnly swear that I am up to no good****.' **

**A map of Hogwarts appeared on the blank surface of the parchment. Tiny black moving dots, labelled with names, showed where various people were. **

'**Filch is on the second floor,' said Harry, holding the map close to his eyes, 'and Mrs. Norris is on the fourth.' **

"What about Umb!tch?" asked Sirius. "She'd better not be anywhere near."

'**And Umbridge?' said Hermione anxiously. **

'**In her office,' said Harry, pointing. 'OK, lets go.' **

**They hurried along the corridor to the place Dobby had described to Harry, a stretch of blank wall opposite an enormous tapestry depicting Barnabas the Barmy's foolish attempt to train trolls for the ballet. **

"It's no wonder he was called that," remarked James, snickering. "I mean, come on, training trolls for ballet?"

'**OK,' said Harry quietly, while a moth-eaten troll paused in his relentless clubbing of the would-be ballet teacher to watch them. 'Dobby said to walk past this bit of wall three times, concentrating hard on what we need.' **

"Well, the instructions are correct," said Lily.

**They did so, turning sharply at the window just beyond the blank stretch of wall, then at the man-sized vase on its other side. Ron had screwed up his eyes in concentration; Hermione was whispering something under her breath; Harry's fists were clenched as he stared ahead of him. **

**We need somewhere to learn to fight**** … he thought. ****Just give us a place to practise… somewhere they can't find us****… **

'**Harry!' said Hermione sharply, as they wheeled around after their third walk past. **

**A highly polished door had appeared in the wall. Ron was staring at it, looking slightly wary. Harry reached out, seized the brass handle, pulled open the door and led the way into a spacious room lit with flickering torches like those that illuminated the dungeons eight floors below. **

**The walls were lined with wooden bookcases and instead of chairs there were large silk cushions on the floor. A set of shelves at the far end of the room carried a range of instruments such as Sneakoscopes, Secrecy Sensors and a large, cracked Foe-Glass that Harry was sure had hung, the previous year, in the fake Moody's office. **

"It's the perfect room to practice Defence in," declared Remus.

'**These will be good when we're practising Stunning,' said Ron enthusiastically, prodding one of the cushions with his foot. **

"Yeah," said Peter. "Hey, what if we imagine the room to be like it is in the book just for a few minutes so we can see it, not just read about it?"

The others agreed and after checking the Marauder's Map to make sure that nobody was around, they stepped out into the hall and wished for the Defence room. When they entered, the Room of Requirement looked exactly the way it did in the book. After examining it, they went outside and wished for it to go back to the way it was before. Then they settled on the sofa and armchairs and resumed reading.

'**And just look at these books!' said Hermione excitedly, running a finger along the spines of the large leather-bound tomes. '****A Compendium of Common Curses and their Counter-Actions… The Dark Arts Outsmarted… Self-Defensive Spellwork****… wow…' **

"And as usual, Hermione's excited about all the books," said Sirius.

"Well, the books do sound interesting," said Lily. "And they'll be of more use than the _Defensive Magical Theory_ and the Lockhart books."

**She looked around at Harry, her face glowing, and he saw that the presence of hundreds of books had finally convinced Hermione that what they were doing was right. **

"It would," said Remus, sounding amused.

'**Harry, this is wonderful, there's everything we need here!' **

**And without further ado she slid ****Jinxes for the Jinxed**** from its shelf, sank on to the nearest cushion and began to read. **

There was a gentle knock on the door. Harry looked round. Ginny, Neville, Lavender, Parvati and Dean had arrived.

'**Whoa,' said Dean, staring around, impressed. 'What is this place?' **

"It's the Room of Requirement," stated Peter simply.

**Harry began to explain, but before he had finished more people had arrived and he had to start all over again. By the time eight o'clock arrived, every cushion was occupied. Harry moved across to the door and turned the key protruding from the lock; it clicked in a satisfyingly loud way and everybody fell silent, looking at him. Hermione carefully marked her page of**_**Jinxes**_**for the Jinxed**** and set the book aside. **

'**Well,' said Harry, slightly nervously. 'This is the place we've found for practice sessions, and you've - er - obviously found it OK.' **

**'It's fantastic!' said Cho, and several people murmured their agreement. **

**'It's bizarre,' said Fred, frowning around at it. 'We once hid from Filch in here, remember, George? But it was just a broom cupboard then.' **

"Because that was what you need to hide from Filch in," said James.

'**Hey, Harry, what's this stuff?' asked Dean from the rear of the room, indicating the Sneakoscopes and the Foe-Glass.**

'**Dark detectors,' said Harry, stepping between the cushions to reach them. 'Basically they all show when Dark wizards or enemies are around, but you don't want to rely on them too much, they can be fooled…' **

**He gazed for a moment into the cracked Foe-Glass; shadowy figures were moving around inside it, though none was recognisable. **

"That's because Death Eaters, Voldemort, and Umb!tch are not around close by," said Sirius.

**He turned his back on it.**

'**Well, I've been thinking about the sort of stuff we ought to do first and - er -' He noticed a raised hand. 'What, Hermione?' **

'**I think we ought to elect a leader,' said Hermione. **

"The obvious choice is my son," said Lily. "He's the one teaching."

'**Harry's leader,' said Cho at once, looking at Hermione as though she were mad.**

**Harry's stomach did yet another back-flip. **

'**Yes, but I think we ought to vote on it properly,' said Hermione, unperturbed. 'It makes it formal and it gives him authority. So - everyone who thinks Harry ought to be our leader?' **

**Everybody put up their hand, even Zacharias Smith, though he did it very half-heartedly. **

"Excellent!" exclaimed James. "My son is the leader of the group!"

'**Er - right, thanks,' said Harry, who could feel his face burning. 'And - ****what****, Hermione?' **

'**I also think we ought to have a name,' she said brightly, her hand still in the air. 'It would promote a feeling of team spirit and unity, don't you think?' **

'**Can we be the Anti-Umbridge League?' said Angelina hopefully. **

"That's a good name," said Sirius. "They are against her."

'**Or the Ministry of Magic are Morons Group?' suggested Fred. **

They all chuckled at that and Peter said, "That's really funny. It could work."

'**I was thinking,' said Hermione, frowning at Fred, 'more of a name that didn't tell everyone what we were up to, so we can refer to it safely outside meetings.' **

'**The Defence Association?' said Cho. 'The DA for short, so nobody knows what we're talking about?' **

'**Yeah, the DA's good,' said Ginny. 'Only let's make it stand for Dumbledore's Army, because that's the Ministry's worst fear, isn't it?' **

"You were right, James," said Remus. "So the group is now Dumbledore's Army."

**There was a good deal of appreciative murmuring and laughter at this. **

'**All in favour of the DA?' said Hermione bossily, kneeling up on her cushion to count. 'That's a majority - motion passed!' **

**She pinned the piece of parchment with all of their signatures on it on to the wall and wrote across the top in large letters: DUMBLEDORE'S ARMY.**

"It's an excellent name," said Lily. "It fits and everything."

'**Right,' said Harry, when she had sat down again, 'shall we get practising then? I was thinking, the first thing we should do is ****Expelliarmus****, you know, the Disarming Charm. I know it's pretty basic but I've found it really useful -' **

'**Oh,****please****,' said Zacharias Smith, rolling his eyes and folding his arms. 'I don't think ****Expelliarmus**** is exactly going to help us against You-Know-Who, do you?' **

"It saved Harry's life in June!" snapped James hotly. "I really don't like Smith."

'**I've used it against him,' said Harry quietly. 'It saved my life in June.' **

**Smith opened his mouth stupidly. The rest of the room was very quiet. **

'**But if you think it's beneath you, you can leave,' Harry said. **

**Smith did not move. Nor did anybody else. **

"Of course not," said Peter. "They're there to learn from Harry."

'**OK,' said Harry, his mouth slightly drier than usual with all these eyes upon him, 'I reckon we should all divide into pairs and practise.' **

**It felt very odd to be issuing instructions, but not nearly as odd as seeing them followed. Everybody got to their feet at once and divided up. Predictably, Neville was left partnerless. **

"Poor Neville," said Lily. "I hope Harry offers to partner with him."

'**You can practise with me,' Harry told him. 'Right - on the count of three, then - one, two, three –' **

**The room was suddenly full of shouts of ****Expelliarmus****. Wands flew in all directions; missed spells hit books on shelves and sent them flying into the air. Harry was too quick for Neville, whose wand went spinning out of his hand, hit the ceiling in a shower of sparks and landed with a clatter on top of a bookshelf, from which Harry retrieved it with a Summoning Charm. Glancing around, he thought he had been right to suggest they practise the basics first; there was a lot of shoddy spellwork going on; many people were not succeeding in Disarming their opponents at all, but merely causing them to jump backwards a few paces or wince as their feeble spell whooshed over them.**

"I can't believe that so many of them don't know Disarming," said Sirius, looking incredulous. "Surely Moony or the fake Moody taught them!"

"I don't think Moody would have taught something as basic as Disarming," said Remus. "He went over stuff like the Unforgiveables. As for me, I apparently spent much of my time teaching how to deal with Dark creatures, at least with the third years."

'**Expelliarmus****!' said Neville, and Harry, caught unawares, felt his wand fly out of his hand. **

'**I DID IT!' said Neville gleefully. 'I've never done it before - I DID IT!' **

"Of course, in real battle or duel, the opponent isn't going to be not paying attention, but it's still good," said James. "Especially considering that it's the first time for Neville."

'**Good one!' said Harry encouragingly, deciding not to point out that in a real duel Neville's opponent was unlikely to be staring in the opposite direction with his hand held loosely at his side. 'Listen, Neville, can you take it in turns to practise with Ron and Hermione for a couple of minutes so I can walk around and see how the rest are doing?' **

**Harry moved off into the middle of the room. Something very odd was happening to Zacharias Smith. Every time he opened his mouth to disarm Anthony Goldstein, his own wand would fly out of his hand, yet Anthony did not seem to be making a sound. Harry did not have to look far to solve the mystery: Fred and George were several feet from Smith and taking it in turns to point their wands at his back. **

They all chuckled and Sirius muttered, "Serves Smith right. He's annoying."

'**Sorry, Harry,' said George hastily, when Harry caught his eye. 'Couldn't resist.' **

**Harry walked around the other pairs, trying to correct those who were doing the spell wrong. Ginny was teamed with Michael Corner; she was doing very well, whereas Michael was either very bad or unwilling to jinx her. **

"Maybe it's both," suggested James.

**Ernie Macmillan was flourishing his wand unnecessarily, giving his partner time to get in under his guard; the Creevey brothers were enthusiastic but erratic and mainly responsible for all the books leaping off the shelves around them; Luna Lovegood was similarly patchy, occasionally sending Justin Finch-Fletchley's wand spinning out of his hand, at other times merely causing his hair to stand on end. **

"Well, it looks as if most of them need practice," said Remus, shaking his head.

'**OK, stop!' Harry shouted. '****Stop! STOP****!' **

**I need a whistle****, he thought, and immediately spotted one lying on top of the nearest row of books. He caught it up and blew hard. Everyone lowered their wands.**

'**That wasn't bad, said Harry, 'but there's definite room for improvement.' Zacharias Smith glared at him. 'Let's try again.' **

**He moved off around the room again, stopping here and there to make suggestions. Slowly, the general performance improved. **

"That's good," said Lily. "Harry is turning out to be a decent teacher."

**He avoided going near Cho and her friend for a while, but after walking twice around every other pair in the room felt he could not ignore them any longer. **

'**Oh no,' said Cho rather wildly as he approached. '****Expelliarmious****! I mean, ****Expellimellius**** - I - oh, sorry, Marietta!' **

**Her curly-haired friend's sleeve had caught fire; Marietta extinguished it with her own wand and glared at Harry as though it was his fault. **

'**You made me nervous, I was doing all right before then!' Cho told Harry ruefully. **

"It looks like Cho might return Harry's feelings," said Sirius, grinning. "If she's feeling nervous around him." Lily gave him a Look to keep him making any more comments about it.

'**That was quite good,' Harry lied, but when she raised her eyebrows he said, 'Well, no, it was lousy, but I know you can do it properly, I was watching from over there.' **

**She laughed. Her friend Marietta looked at them rather sourly and turned away. **

'**Don't mind her,' Cho muttered. 'She doesn't really want to be here but I made her come with me. Her parents have forbidden her to do anything that might upset Umbridge. You see - her mum works for the Ministry.' **

"That's not good," said Lily. "If Marietta doesn't want to be here, Cho shouldn't have made her."

'**What about your parents?' asked Harry. **

'**Well, they've forbidden me to get on the wrong side of Umbridge, too,' said Cho, drawing herself up proudly. 'But if they think I'm not going to fight You-Know-Who after what happened to Cedric -' **

"Bringing Cedric up won't help things," said James.

**She broke off, looking rather confused, and an awkward silence fell between them; Terry Boot's wand went whizzing past Harry's ear and hit Alicia Spinnet hard on the nose. **

'**Well, my dad is very supportive of any anti-Ministry action!' said Luna Lovegood proudly from just behind Harry; evidently she had been eavesdropping on his conversation while Justin Finch-Fletchley attempted to disentangle himself from the robes that had flown up over his head. 'He's always saying he'd believe anything of Fudge; I mean, the number of goblins Fudge has had assassinated! And of course he uses the Department of Mysteries to develop terrible poisons, which he secretly feeds to anybody who disagrees with him. And then there's his Umgubular Slashkilter —' **

"Okay," said Sirius slowly. "No wonder some people call Luna 'Loony'."

'**Don't ask,' Harry muttered to Cho as she opened her mouth, looking puzzled. She giggled. **

'**Hey, Harry,' Hermione called from the other end of the room, 'have you checked the time?' **

**He looked down at his watch and was shocked to see it was already ten past nine, which meant they needed to get back to their common rooms immediately or risk being caught and punished by Filch for being out of bounds. He blew his whistle; everybody stopped shouting '****Expelliarmus'**** and the last couple of wands clattered to the floor. **

'**Well, that was pretty good,' said Harry, 'but we've overrun, we'd better leave it here. Same time, same place next week?' **

'**Sooner!' said Dean Thomas eagerly and many people nodded in agreement. **

"Yeah," said James. "They need to meet as often as possible."

**Angelina, however, said quickly, 'The Quidditch season's about to start, we need team practices too!' **

"But this is more important than Quidditch!' protested James. When they all turned to stare at him, he said, "What? It is! If Voldemort wins, do you think anyone will be playing Quidditch again? Defeat him first, then go and play Quidditch."

'**Let's say next Wednesday night, then,' said Harry, 'we can decide on additional meetings then. Come on, we'd better get going.' **

**He pulled out the Marauder's Map again and checked it carefully for signs of teachers on the seventh floor. He let them all leave in threes and fours, watching their tiny dots anxiously to see that they returned safely to their dormitories: the Hufflepuffs to the basement corridor that also led to the kitchens; the Ravenclaws to a tower on the west side of the castle, and the Gryffindors along the corridor to the Fat Lady's portrait. **

'**That was really, really good, Harry,' said Hermione, when finally it was just her, Harry and Ron who were left. **

"It was," said Peter, grinning hugely. "Harry did a great job teaching."

'**Yeah, it was!' said Ron enthusiastically, as they slipped out of the door and watched it melt back into stone behind them. 'Did you see me disarm Hermione, Harry?' **

'**Only once,' said Hermione, stung. 'I got you loads more than you got me ‐' **

'**I did not only get you once, I got you at least three times -' **

'**Well, if you're counting the one where you tripped over your own feet and knocked the wand out of my hand –'**

"Those two are arguing again as usual," said Remus, shaking his head.

**They argued all the way back to the common room, but Harry was not listening to them. He had one eye on the Marauder's Map, but he was also thinking of Cho saying he made her nervous. **

Sirius smirked, but didn't comment. Instead, he volunteered to read next.


	19. The Lion and the Serpent

This chapter is dedicated to my reviewers ProperT, LLAMAS WILL RULE THE WORLD, Ze Ultimate Fanfic Writer, Murdax, and TriGemini. From now on, all chapters will be dedicated to five of my reviewers.

— **CHAPTER NINETEEN — **

**The Lion and the Serpent**

"What kind of chapter title is that?" asked Peter.

"Probably something involving Gryffindor and Slytherin, since the title has both their house symbols," responded Remus.

**Harry felt as though he were carrying some kind of talisman inside his chest over the following two weeks, a glowing secret that supported him through Umbridge's classes and even made it possible for him to smile blandly as he looked into her horrible bulging eyes. He and the DA were resisting her under her very nose, doing the very thing she and the Ministry most feared, and whenever he was supposed to be reading Wilbert Slinkhard's book during her lessons he dwelled instead on satisfying memories of their most recent meetings, remembering how Neville had successfully disarmed Hermione, how Colin Creevey had mastered the Impediment Jinx after three meetings' hard effort, how Parvati Patil had produced such a good Reductor Curse that she had reduced the table carrying all the Sneakoscopes to dust.**

"Well, the students appear to be doing well," said Lily, smiling.

"We're all very proud of you, son," said James. "Keep up the good teaching."

"Besides Moony, Harry's the best Defence Against Dark Arts teacher they've ever had," said Sirius proudly.

**He was finding it almost impossible to fix a regular night of the week for the DA meetings, as they had to accommodate three separate team's Quidditch practices, which were often rearranged due to bad weather conditions; but Harry was not sorry about this; he had a feeling that it was probably better to keep the timing of their meetings unpredictable. If anyone was watching them, it would be hard to make out a pattern. **

"Also, it doesn't make the DA into any sort of club or group," said Remus. "I've found a loophole in that Educational Decree Twenty-Four. It says that any club or teams or whatever is defined as a regular meeting between three or more students. But the DA doesn't have regular meetings, as in meeting every Tuesday or whatever. The meetings are all irregular, as in one week it's on Friday and next week on Wednesday."

"Remus, using that logic, it would also apply to Quidditch, because the practices aren't regular either," said Lily. "And Umbridge didn't look at it like that."

**Hermione soon devised a very clever method of communicating the time and date of the next meeting to all the members in case they needed to change it at short notice, because it would look suspicious if people from different Houses were seen crossing the Great Hall to talk to each other too often. **

"Where would they be without Hermione?" asked James. "She's living proof that witches are as good, or better than, wizards."

**She gave each of the members of the DA a fake Galleon (Ron became very excited when he first saw the basket and was convinced she was actually giving out gold). **

'**You see the numerals around the edge of the coins?' Hermione said, holding one up for examination at the end of their fourth meeting. The coin gleamed fat and yellow in the light from the torches. 'On real Galleons that's just a serial number referring to the goblin who cast the coin. On these fake coins, though, the numbers will change to reflect the time and date of the next meeting. The coins will grow hot when the date changes, so if you're carrying them in a pocket you'll be able to feel them. We take one each, and when Harry sets the date of the next meeting he'll change the numbers on his coin, and because I've put a Protean Charm on them, they'll all change to mimic his.' **

"Hermione can do a Protean Charm?" asked Peter. "But isn't that NEWT level?"

"Yes," said Sirius. "And it's further proof how brilliant Hermione is."

**A blank silence greeted Hermione's words. She looked around at all the faces upturned to her, rather disconcerted. **

**'Well - I thought it was a good idea,' she said uncertainly, 'I mean, even if Umbridge asked us to turn out our pockets, there's nothing fishy about carrying a Galleon, is there? But… well, if you don't want to use them -' **

**'You can do a Protean Charm?' said Terry Boot. **

**'Yes,' said Hermione. **

**'But that's… that's NEWT standard, that is,' he said weakly. **

**'Oh,' said Hermione, trying to look modest. 'Oh… well… yes, I suppose it is.' **

**'How come you're not in Ravenclaw?' he demanded, staring at Hermione with something close to wonder. 'With brains like yours?' **

"Because Hermione wanted to be in Gryffindor rather than Ravenclaw," said Lily. "And she does possess the necessary courage and bravery."

"**Well, the Sorting Hat did seriously consider putting me in Ravenclaw during my Sorting," said Hermione brightly, "but it decided on Gryffindor in the end. So, does that mean we're using the Galleons?" **

**There was a murmur of assent and everybody moved forwards to collect one from the basket. Harry looked sideways at Hermione. **

"**You know what these remind me of?" **

**'No, what's that?' **

'**The Death Eaters' scars. Voldemort touches one of them, and all their scars burn, and they know they've got to join him.' **

"Oh yeah, Harry's right," said Remus. "They are similar to the Death Eaters' scars."

'**Well… yes,' said Hermione quietly, 'that is where I got the idea ... but you'll notice I decided to engrave the date on bits of metal rather than on our members' skin."**

'**Yeah… I prefer your way,' said Harry, grinning, as he slipped his Galleon into his pocket. 'I suppose the only danger with these is that we might accidentally spend them.' **

'**Fat chance,' said Ron, who was examining his own fake Galleon with a slightly mournful air, 'I haven't got any real Galleons to confuse it with.' **

**As the first Quidditch match of the season, Gryffindor versus Slytherin, drew nearer, their DA meetings were put on hold because Angelina insisted on almost daily practices. **

"I know Quidditch is great, but the DA is more important," said James. "I do want Gryffindor to win the match, but if they know nothing about Defence and Voldemort wins, then nobody's going to play Quidditch unless Moldy Voldy says so."

"But Moldywart isn't going to show up anytime soon for them to fight," said Peter reasonably. "So they can focus on Quidditch briefly and then focus back on the DA once the match is over."

**The fact that the Quidditch Cup had not been held for so long added considerably to the interest and excitement surrounding the forthcoming game; the Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs were taking a lively interest in the outcome, for they, of course, would be playing both teams over the coming year; and the Heads of House of the competing teams, though they attempted to disguise it under a decent pretence of sportsmanship, were determined to see their own side victorious. Harry realised how much Professor McGonagall cared about beating Slytherin when she abstained from giving them homework in the week leading up to the match. **

"McGonagall's never done that for us before!" cried Sirius.

'**I think you've got enough to be getting on with at the moment,' she said loftily. Nobody could quite believe their ears until she looked directly at Harry and Ron and said grimly, 'I've become accustomed to seeing the Quidditch Cup in my study, boys, and I really don't want to have to hand it over to Professor Snape, so use the extra time to practise, won't you?' **

"I'm positive they will," said James. "I don't want Sniv –" Lily glared at him and he hastily changed it to, "Snape to get the Cup, either."

**Snape was no less obviously partisan; he had booked the Quidditch pitch for Slytherin practice so often that the Gryffindors had difficulty getting on it to play. He was also turning a deaf ear to the many reports of Slytherin attempts to hex Gryffindor players in the corridors. **

"He_what_?" cried Sirius, outraged. He pulled out his Snape list and added to it.

"Why did Snape have to end up like this?" asked Lily, shaking her head.

**When Alicia Spinnet turned up in the hospital wing with her eyebrows growing so thick and fast they obscured her vision and obstructed her mouth, Snape insisted that she must have attempted a Hair-thickening Charm on herself and refused to listen to the fourteen eye-witnesses who insisted they had seen the Slytherin Keeper, Miles Bletchley, hit her from behind with a jinx while she worked in the library. **

**Harry felt optimistic about Gryffindor's chances; they had, after all, never lost to Malfoy's team. **

"Most of it due to the fact that Harry always manages to catch the Snitch," said Remus.

**Admittedly, Ron was still not performing to Wood's standard, but he was working extremely hard to improve. His greatest weakness was a tendency to lose confidence after he had made a blunder; if he let in one goal he became flustered and was therefore likely to miss more. On the other hand, Harry had seen Ron make some truly spectacular saves when he was on form; during one memorable practice he had hung one-handed from his broom and kicked the Quaffle so hard away from the goal hoop that it soared the length of the pitch and through the centre hoop at the other end; **

"Wow," said Peter. "That was an amazing save."

"Yeah," agreed James. "I don't think anyone's ever done such a save before."

**the rest of the team felt this save compared favourably with one made recently by Barry Ryan, the Irish International Keeper, against Poland's top Chaser, Ladislaw Zamojski. Even Fred had said that Ron might yet make him and George proud, and that they were seriously considering admitting he was related to them, something they assured him they had been trying to deny for four years. **

**The only thing really worrying Harry was how much Ron was allowing the tactics of the Slytherin team to upset him before they even got on to the pitch. **

"Can't Ron just ignore them or come up with a retort?" asked Remus.

**Harry, of course, had endured their snide comments for over four years, so whispers of, 'Hey, Potty, I heard Warrington's sworn to knock you off your broom on Saturday', far from chilling his blood, made him laugh. **

'**Warrington's aim's so pathetic I'd be more worried if he was aiming for the person next to me,' he retorted, which made Ron and Hermione laugh and wiped the smirk off Pansy Parkinson's face. **

**But Ron had never endured a relentless campaign of insults, jeers and intimidation. When Slytherins, some of them seventh-years and considerably larger than he was, muttered as they passed in the corridors, 'Got your bed booked in the hospital wing, Weasley?' he didn't laugh, but turned a delicate shade of green. When Draco Malfoy imitated Ron dropping the Quaffle (which he did whenever they came within sight of each other), Ron's ears glowed red and his hands shook so badly that he was likely to drop whatever he was holding at the time, too.**

"Poor Ron," said Lily sympathetically.

"I'd be like that if I was Ron," said Peter.

**October extinguished itself in a rush of howling winds and driving rain and November arrived, cold as frozen iron, with hard frosts every morning and icy draughts that bit at exposed hands and faces. The skies and the ceiling of the Great Hall turned a pale, pearly grey, the mountains around Hogwarts were snow-capped, and the temperature in the castle dropped so low that many students wore their thick protective dragonskin gloves in the corridors between lessons. **

**The morning of the match dawned bright and cold. **

"Well, at least the weather's good, if somewhat cold," said Sirius.

**When Harry awoke he looked round at Ron's bed and saw him sitting bolt upright, his arms around his knees, staring fixedly into space. **

'**You all right?' said Harry. **

**Ron nodded but did not speak. Harry was reminded forcibly of the time Ron had accidentally put a Slug-vomiting Charm on himself; he looked just as pale and sweaty as he had done then, not to mention as reluctant to open his mouth. **

"I hope Ron gets over his fit of nerves soon," said James worriedly.

'**You just need some breakfast,' Harry said bracingly. 'C'mon.' **

**The Great Hall was filling up fast when they arrived, the talk louder and the mood more exuberant than usual. As they passed the Slytherin table there was an upsurge of noise. Harry looked round and saw that, in addition to the usual green and silver scarves and hats, every one of them was wearing a silver badge in the shape of what seemed to be a crown. For some reason many of them waved at Ron, laughing uproariously. Harry tried to see what was written on the badges as he walked by, but he was too concerned to get Ron past their table quickly to linger long enough to read them. **

"I would bet the contents of my vault that it's something making fun of Gryffindor," said Sirius grimly. "In particular, Ron, since they're waving at him and laughing."

**They received a rousing welcome at the Gryffindor table, where everyone was wearing red and gold, but far from raising Ron's spirits the cheers seemed to sap the last of his morale; he collapsed on to the nearest bench looking as though he were facing his final meal. **

'**I must've been mental to do this,' he said in a croaky whisper. '****Mental**

'**Don't be thick,' said Harry firmly, passing him a choice of cereals, 'you're going to be fine. It's normal to be nervous.' **

"Calm down, Ron," said Lily gently. "I'm sure you'll do well."

'**I'm rubbish,' croaked Ron. 'I'm lousy. I can't play to save my life. What was I thinking?' **

'**Get a grip,' said Harry sternly. 'Look at that save you made with your foot the other day, even Fred and George said it was brilliant.'**

**Ron turned a tortured face to Harry. 'That was an accident,' he whispered miserably. 'I didn't mean to do it - I slipped off my broom when none of you were looking and when I was trying to get back on I kicked the Quaffle by accident.' **

James and Sirius exchanged looks, finding this a very unpleasant surprise. Finally Remus said, "I think we should hope that Ron has a few more accidents like that during the game, or the only way Gryffindor will win is if Harry catches the Snitch quickly."

**'Well,' said Harry, recovering quickly from this unpleasant surprise, 'a few more accidents like that and the game's in the bag, isn't it?' **

**Hermione and Ginny sat down opposite them wearing red and gold scarves, gloves and rosettes. **

'**How're you feeling?' Ginny asked Ron, who was now staring into the dregs of milk at the bottom of his empty cereal bowl as though seriously considering attempting to drown himself in them. **

'**He's just nervous,' said Harry. **

**'Well, that's a good sign, I never feel you perform as well in exams if you're not a bit nervous,' said Hermione heartily. **

"Exams and Quidditch are two different things," said Peter.

**'Hello,' said a vague and dreamy voice from behind them. Harry looked up: Luna Lovegood had drifted over from the Ravenclaw table. Many people were staring at her and a few were openly laughing and pointing; she had managed to procure a hat shaped like a life-size lion's head, which was perched precariously on her head. **

After a moment of silence, Lily said, "Well, she's definitely supporting Gryffindor then."

'**I'm supporting Gryffindor,' said Luna, pointing unnecessarily at her hat. 'Look what it does…' **

**She reached up and tapped the hat with her wand. It opened its mouth wide and gave an extremely realistic roar that made everyone in the vicinity jump. **

'**It's good, isn't it?' said Luna happily. 'I wanted to have it chewing up a serpent to represent Slytherin, you know, but there wasn't time. Anyway… good luck, Ronald!' **

"I don't know if it's good or not, but at least it shows Luna supports Gryffindor," said Remus. "And to make a hat like that shows that she's very good at Transfiguration and Charms."

**She drifted away. They had not quite recovered from the shock of Luna's hat before Angelina came hurrying towards them, accompanied by Katie and Alicia, whose eyebrows had mercifully been returned to normal by Madam Pomfrey. **

'**When you're ready,' she said, 'we're going to go straight down to the pitch, check out conditions and change.' **

'**We'll be there in a bit,' Harry assured her. 'Ron's just got to have some breakfast.' **

"With the state Ron's in, he's not going to be able to eat anything more," remarked James.

**It became clear after ten minutes, however, that Ron was not capable of eating anything more and Harry thought it best to get him down to the changing rooms. As they rose from the table, Hermione got up, too, and taking Harry's arm she drew him to one side. **

'**Don't let Ron see what's on those Slytherin badges,' she whispered urgently. **

**Harry looked questioningly at her, but she shook her head warningly; Ron had just ambled over to them, looking lost and desperate. **

'**Good luck, Ron,' said Hermione, standing on tiptoe and kissing him on the cheek. **

"That was unexpected," said Peter. "Maybe Hermione and Ron will end up together."

'**And you, Harry –' **

**Ron seemed to come to himself slightly as they walked back across the Great Hall. He touched the spot on his face where Hermione had kissed him, looking puzzled, as though he was not quite sure what had just happened. He seemed too distracted to notice much around him, but Harry cast a curious glance at the crown-shaped badges as they passed the Slytherin table, and this time he made out the words etched on to them: ****_Weasley is our King_.**

"This can't be good," said Sirius. He added to his Slytherin list.

**With an unpleasant feeling that this could mean nothing good, he hurried Ron across the Entrance Hall, down the stone steps and out into the icy air. **

**The frosty grass crunched under their feet as they hurried down the sloping lawns towards the stadium. There was no wind at all and the sky was a uniform pearly white, which meant that visibility would be good without the drawback of direct sunlight in the eyes. Harry pointed out these encouraging factors to Ron as they walked, but he was not sure that Ron was listening. **

**Angelina had changed already and was talking to the rest of the team when they entered. Harry and Ron pulled on their robes (Ron attempted to do his up back-to-front for several minutes before Alicia took pity on him and went to help), then sat down to listen to the pre-match talk while the babble of voices outside grew steadily louder as the crowd came pouring out of the castle towards the pitch. **

**'OK, I've only just found out the final line-up for Slytherin,' said Angelina, consulting a piece of parchment. 'Last year's Beaters, Derrick and Bole, have left, but it looks as though Montague's replaced them with the usual gorillas, rather than anyone who can fly particularly well. They're two blokes called Crabbe and Goyle, I don't know much about them ‐' **

"Malfoy's goons are the _Beaters_?" demanded Remus. "They'll be rubbish, then. In flying, at any rate."

'**We do,' said Harry and Ron together. **

**'Well, they don't look bright enough to tell one end of a broom from the other,' said Angelina, pocketing her parchment, 'but then I was always surprised Derrick and Bole managed to find their way on to the pitch without signposts.' **

They all chuckled and Sirius said, "Crabbe and Goyle are the same."

'**Crabbe and Goyle are in the same mould,' Harry assured her. **

**They could hear hundreds of footsteps mounting the banked benches of the spectators' stands. Some people were singing, though Harry could not make out the words. He was starting to feel nervous, but he knew his butterflies were as nothing compared to Ron's, who was clutching his stomach and staring straight ahead again, his jaw set and his complexion pale grey. **

"Looks like Ron hasn't gotten over his nerves yet," said James dismally.

'**It's time,' said Angelina in a hushed voice, looking at her watch. 'C'mon everyone… good luck.' **

**The team rose, shouldered their brooms and marched in single file out of the changing room and into the dazzling sunlight. A roar of sound greeted them in which Harry could still hear singing, though the cheers and whistles muffled it.**

**The Slytherin team was standing waiting for them. They, too, were wearing those silver crown-shaped badges. The new Captain, Montague, was built along the same lines as Dudley Dursley, with massive forearms like hairy hams. Behind him lurked Crabbe and Goyle, almost as large, blinking stupidly in the sunlight, swinging their new Beaters' bats. Malfoy stood to one side, the sunlight gleaming on his white-blond head. He caught Harry's eye and smirked, tapping the crown-shaped badge on his chest. **

**'Captains, shake hands,' ordered the referee Madam Hooch, as Angelina and Montague reached each other. Harry could tell that Montague was trying to crush Angelina's fingers, though she did not wince. 'Mount your brooms…' **

**Madam Hooch placed her whistle in her mouth and blew. **

**The balls were released and the fourteen players shot upwards. Out of the corner of his eye Harry saw Ron streak off towards the goalhoops. Harry zoomed higher, dodging a Bludger, and set off on a wide lap of the pitch, gazing around for a glint of gold; on the other side of the stadium, Draco Malfoy was doing exactly the same. **

'**And it's Johnson - Johnson with the Quaffle, what a player that girl is, I've been saying it for years but she still won't go out with me –' **

They all laughed over Lee Jordan's commentary. "I think you'd have better luck if you were Fred," said Lily. "After all, Angelina did go with Fred to the Yule Ball."

'**JORDAN!' yelled Professor McGonagall. **

**'- Just a fun fact, Professor, adds a bit of interest - and she's ducked Warrington, she's passed Montague, she's — ouch – been hit from behind by a Bludger from Crabbe… Montague catches the Quaffle, Montague heading back up the pitch and - nice Bludger there from George Weasley, that's a Bludger to the head for Montague, he drops the Quaffle, caught by Katie Bell, Katie Bell of Gryffindor reverse-passes to Alicia Spinnet and Spinnet's away –'**

**Lee Jordan's commentary rang through the stadium and Harry listened as hard as he could through the wind whistling in his ears and the din of the crowd, all yelling and booing and singing. **

**'- Dodges Warrington, avoids a Bludger - close call, Alicia - and the crowd are loving this, just listen to them, what's that they're singing?'**

**And as Lee paused to listen, the song rose loud and clears from the sea of green and silver in the Slytherin section of the stands: **

'_**Weasley cannot save a thing, He cannot block a single ring, That's why Slytherins all sing: Weasley is our King.**_

_'_**_Weasley was born in a bin, He always lets the Quaffle in, and Weasley will make sure we win, Weasley is our King_.'**

"Oh no," groaned Peter. "The Slytherins are singing a song making fun of Ron."

Sirius cursed and added to his Slytherin list and the others looked outraged.

**—**** And Alicia passes back to Angelina!' Lee shouted, and as Harry swerved, his insides boiling at what he had just heard, he knew Lee was trying to drown out the words of the song. 'Come on now, Angelina — looks like she's got just the Keeper to beat! - SHE SHOOTS - SHE - aaaah…' **

**Bletchley, the Slytherin Keeper, had saved the goal; he threw the Quaffle to Warrington who sped off with it, zig-zagging in between Alicia and Katie; the singing from below grew louder and louder as he drew nearer and nearer Ron. **

'**_Weasley is our King, Weasley is our King, He always lets the Quaffle in Weasley is our King._'**

"The song isn't going to help Ron's confidence any," said James grimly. "If anything, it'll just make Ron more likely to not block the goals."

**Harry could not help himself: abandoning his search for the Snitch, he wheeled around to watch Ron, a lone figure at the far end of the pitch, hovering before the three goalhoops while the massive Warrington pelted towards him. **

**'- And it's Warrington with the Quaffle, Warrington heading for goal, he's out of Bludger range with just the Keeper ahead -' **

**A great swell of song rose from the Slytherin stands below: **

'**_Weasley cannot save a thing, He cannot block a single ring_...'**

**'- So it's the first test for new Gryffindor Keeper Weasley, brother of Beaters Fred and George, and a promising new talent on the team - come on, Ron!' **

**But the scream of delight came from the Slytherins' end: Ron had dived wildly, his arms wide, and the Quaffle had soared between them straight through Ron's central hoop. **

They all groaned loudly, but didn't say anything about Ron's miss.

'**Slytherin score!' came Lee's voice amid the cheering and booing from the crowds below, 'so that's ten-nil to Slytherin - bad luck, Ron.' **

**The Slytherins sang even louder: **

'_**WEASLEY WAS BORN IN A BIN **_

_**HE ALWAYS LETS THE QUAFFLE IN**_**…' **

**'- and Gryffindor back in possession and it's Katie Bell tanking up the pitch - ' cried Lee valiantly, though the singing was now so deafening that he could hardly make himself heard above it.**

'_**WEASLEY WILL MAKE SURE WE WIN **_

**_WEASLEY IS OUR KING_…'**

'**Harry, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?' screamed Angelina, soaring past him to keep up with Katie. 'GET GOING!' **

**Harry realised he had been stationary in midair for over a minute, watching the progress of the match without sparing a thought for the whereabouts of the Snitch; horrified, he went into a dive and started circling the pitch again, staring around, **

"Yeah, get your mind back on looking for the Snitch, Harry!" snapped Sirius.

**trying to ignore the chorus now thundering through the stadium: **

'_**WEASLEY**__** IS**_**_ OUR KING, WEASLEY IS OUR KING_****…' **

**There was no sign of the Snitch anywhere he looked; Malfoy was still circling the stadium just as he was. They passed one another midway around the pitch, going in opposite directions, and Harry heard Malfoy singing loudly: **

'_**WEASLEY WAS BORN IN**_**_ A BIN_****…' **

'—**and it's Warrington again,' bellowed Lee, 'who passes to Pucey, Pucey's off past Spinnet, come on now, Angelina, you can take him - turns out you can't - but nice Bludger from Fred Weasley, I mean, George Weasley, oh, who cares, one of them, anyway, and Warrington drops the Quaffle and Katie Bell — er – drops it, too - so that's Montague with the Quaffle, Slytherin Captain Montague takes the Quaffle and he's off up the pitch, come on now, Gryffindor, block him!' **

**Harry zoomed around the end of the stadium behind the Slytherin goalhoops, willing himself not to look at what was going on at Ron's end. As he sped past the Slytherin Keeper, he heard Bletchley singing along with the crowd below: **

'**_WEASLEY CANNOT SAVE A THING_…' **

'‐ **and Pucey's dodged Alicia again and he's heading straight for goal, stop it, Ron!' **

"I think it's too much to hope for," said Peter.

**Harry did not have to look to see what had happened; there was a terrible groan from the Gryffindor end, coupled with f****resh screams and applause from the Slytherins. **

Lily and the Marauders groaned again. "Oh, will this ever end?" asked Remus.

**Looking down, Harry saw the pug-faced Pansy Parkinson right at the front of the stands, her back to the pitch as she conducted the Slytherin supporters who were roaring: **

'_**THAT'S WHY SLYTHERINS ALL SING WEASLEY IS OUR KING**_**.' **

**But twenty-nil was nothing, there was still time for Gryffindor to catch up or catch the Snitch. A few goals and they would be in the lead as usual, Harry assured himself, bobbing and weaving through the other players in pursuit of something shiny that turned out to be Montague's watchstrap. **

**But Ron let in two more goals. There was an edge of panic in Harry's desire to find the Snitch now. If he could just get it soon and finish the game quickly. **

"Yeah, the only way Gryffindor will win now is if Harry catches the Snitch very soon," said Lily. They all looked worried.

**'‐and Katie Bell of Gryffindor dodges Pucey, ducks Montague, nice swerve, Katie, and she throws to Johnson, Angelina Johnson takes the Quaffle, she's past Warrington, she's heading for goal, come on now, Angelina - GRYFFINDOR SCORE! It's forty-ten, forty-****ten to Slytherin and Pucey has the Quaffle –' **

They all cheered. "Gryffindor is starting to catch up!" exclaimed James.

**Harry could hear Luna's ludicrous lion hat roaring amidst the Gryffindor cheers and felt heartened; only thirty points in it, that was nothing, they could pull back easily. Harry ducked a Bludger that Crabbe had sent rocketing in his direction and resumed his frantic scouring of the pitch for the Snitch, keeping one eye on Malfoy in case he showed signs of having spotted it, but Malfoy, like him, was continuing to soar around the stadium, searching fruitlessly… **

**'— Pucey throws to Warrington, Warrington to Montague, Montague back to Pucey -Johnson intervenes, Johnson takes the Quaffle, Johnson to Bell, this looks good - I mean bad - Bells hit by a Bludger from Goyle of Slytherin and it's Pucey in possession –' **

'_**WEASLEY WAS BORN IN A BIN**_

_**HE**__** ALWAYS LETS THE QUAFFLE**_** _IN_**

_**WEASLEY WILL MAKE SURE WE WIN –'**_

"Oh, why can't they Slytherins stop seeing that stupid song?" demanded Remus.

**But Harry had seen it at last: the tiny fluttering Golden Snitch was hovering feet from the ground at the Slytherin end of the pitch. **

"Finally," said Sirius. "Well, Gryffindor will win the match now, at least."

**He dived… In a matter of seconds, Malfoy was streaking out of the sky on Harry's left, a green and silver blur lying flat on his broom… **

**The Snitch skirted the foot of one of the goalhoops and scooted off towards the other side of the stands; its change of direction suited Malfoy, who was nearer; Harry pulled his Firebolt around, he and Malfoy were now neck and neck… **

**Feet from the ground, Harry lifted his right hand from his broom, stretching towards the Snitch… to his right, Malfoy's arm extended too, was reaching, groping… **

**It was over in two breathless, desperate, windswept seconds - Harry's fingers closed around the tiny, struggling ball - Malfoy's fingernails scrabbled the back of Harry's hand hopelessly - Harry pulled his broom upwards, holding the struggling ball in his hand and the Gryffindor spectators screamed their approval… **

They all cheered loudly. "Hooray for Harry!" shouted Peter. "Gryffindor wins!"

**They were saved, it did not matter that Ron had let in those goals, nobody would remember as long as Gryffindor had won - WHAM. **

**A Bludger hit Harry squarely in the small of the back and he flew forwards off his broom. **

"What!" cried Lily, outraged. "Who hit that Bludger at my son?"

**Luckily he was only five or six feet above the ground, having dived so low to catch the Snitch, but he was winded all the same as he landed flat on his back on the frozen pitch. He heard Madam Hooch's shrill whistle, an uproar in the stands compounded of catcalls, angry yells and jeering, a thud, then Angelina's frantic voice. **

'**Are you all right?' **

'**Course I am,' said Harry grimly, taking her hand and allowing her to pull him to his feet. Madam Hooch was zooming towards one of the Slytherin players above him, though he could not see who it was from this angle. **

Sirius dipped his quill in ink and prepared to add to the Slytherin list.

'**It was that thug Crabbe,' said Angelina angrily, 'he whacked the Bludger at you the moment he saw you'd got the Snitch - but we won, Harry, we won!' **

**Harry heard a snort from behind him and turned around, still holding the Snitch tightly in his hand: Draco Malfoy had landed close by. White-faced with fury, he was still managing to sneer. **

'**Saved Weasley's neck, haven't you?' he said to Harry. 'I've never seen a worse Keeper… but then he was **_**born**_** in a bin****… did you like my lyrics, Potter?' **

"Nobody except the rest of the Slytherins liked those stupid lyrics!" snapped Sirius, busily adding to his list.

**Harry didn't answer. He turned away to meet the rest of the team who were now landing one by one, yelling and punching the air in triumph; all except Ron, who had dismounted from his broom over by the goalposts and seemed to be making his way slowly back to the changing rooms alone. **

'**We wanted to write another couple of verses!' Malfoy called, as Katie and Alicia hugged Harry. 'But we couldn't find rhymes for fat and ugly - we wanted to sing about his mother, see -' **

"How dare he!" cried Lily, furious. "Oh, I wish I could get my hands on him!"

'**Talk about sour grapes,' said Angelina, casting Malfoy a disgusted look. **

**'- We couldn't fit in ****useless loser**** either - for his father, you know -' **

**Fred and George had realised what Malfoy was talking about. Halfway through shaking Harry's hand, they stiffened, looking round at Malfoy. **

'**Leave it!' said Angelina at once, taking Fred by the arm. 'Leave it, Fred, let him yell, he's just sore he lost, the jumped-up little -' **

"Yes, but you can't allow Malfoy to go around insulting your parents, can you?" demanded Remus.

'**- But you like the Weasleys, don't you, Potter?' said Malfoy, sneering. 'Spend holidays there and everything, don't you? Can't see how you stand the stink, but I suppose when you've been dragged up by Muggles, even the Weasleys' hovel smells OK -' **

"The Weasleys don't live in a hovel, and it doesn't stink!" snapped Peter.

**Harry grabbed hold of George. Meanwhile, it was taking the combined efforts of Angelina, Alicia and Katie to stop Fred leaping on Malfoy, who was laughing openly. Harry looked around for Madam Hooch, but she was still berating Crabbe for his illegal Bludger attack. **

'**Or perhaps,' said Malfoy, leering as he backed away, 'you can remember what your mother's house stank like, Potter, and Weasleys pigsty reminds you of it —' **

"That is going too far!" shouted James, bolting to his feet and red with rage. He pointed his wand at a table and in his anger, turned it to dust.

Lily grabbed James's arm and pulled him back into sitting. "James, please ignore it. He's just mad at losing, so that's why he's insulting the Weasleys and me."

**Harry was not aware of releasing George, all he knew was that a second later both of them were sprinting towards Malfoy. He had completely forgotten that all the teachers were watching: all he wanted to do was cause Malfoy as much pain as possible; with no time to draw out his wand, he merely drew back the fist clutching the Snitch and sank it as hard as he could into Malfoy's stomach – **

"You'll get in trouble, Harry!" protested Lily. "The teachers won't care that Malfoy provoked you into fighting."

**'Harry! HARRY! GEORGE! NO!' **

**He could hear girls' voices screaming, Malfoy yelling, George swearing, a whistle blowing and the bellowing of the crowd around him, but he did not care. Not until somebody in the vicinity yelled '****Impedimenta****!' and he was knocked over backwards by the force of the spell, did he abandon the attempt to punch every inch of Malfoy he could reach. **

'**What do you think you're doing?' screamed Madam Hooch, as Harry leapt to his feet. It seemed to have been her who had hit him with the Impediment Jinx; she was holding her whistle in one hand and a wand in the other; her broom lay abandoned several feet away. Malfoy was curled up on the ground, whimpering and moaning, his nose bloody; George was sporting a swollen lip; the three Chasers were still forcibly restraining Fred, and Crabbe was cackling in the background. 'I've never seen behaviour like it - back up to the castle, both of you, and straight to your Head of House's office! Go! Now.'**

"McGonagall will give them a week's detention at the very least," said James, shaking his head.

**Harry and George turned on their heels and marched off the pitch, both panting, neither saying a word to the other. The howling and jeering of the crowd grew fainter and fainter until they reached the Entrance Hall, where they could hear nothing except the sound of their own footsteps. Harry became aware that something was still struggling in his right hand, the knuckles of which he had bruised against Malfoy's jaw. Looking down, he saw the Snitch's silver wings protruding from between his fingers, struggling for release. **

**They had barely reached the door of Professor McGonagall's office when she came marching along the corridor behind them. She was wearing a Gryffindor scarf, but tore it from her throat with shaking hands as she strode towards them, looking livid. **

"Well, of course she would," said Remus.

**'In,' she said furiously, pointing to the door. Harry and George entered. She strode around behind her desk and faced them, quivering with rage as she threw the Gryffindor scarf aside on to the floor. **

**Well****?' she said. 'I have never seen such a disgraceful exhibition. Two on one! Explain yourselves!' **

'**Malfoy provoked us,' said Harry stiffly. **

'**Provoked you?' shouted Professor McGonagall, slamming a fist on to her desk so that her tartan tin slid sideways off it and burst open, littering the floor with Ginger Newts. 'He'd just lost, hadn't he? Of course he wanted to provoke you! But what on earth he can have said that justified what you two —' **

'**He insulted my parents,' snarled George. 'And Harry's mother.' **

'**But instead of leaving it to Madam Hooch to sort out, you two decided to give an exhibition of Muggle duelling, did you?' bellowed Professor McGonagall. **

"But Madam Hooch was busy telling off Crabbe," said Peter.

'**Have you any idea what you've -?' **

**'Hem, hem.'**

**Harry and George both wheeled round. Dolores Umbridge was standing in the doorway wrapped in a green tweed cloak that greatly enhanced her resemblance to a giant toad, and was smiling in the horrible, sickly, ominous way that Harry had come to associate with imminent misery. **

'**May I help, Professor McGonagall?' asked Professor Umbridge in her most poisonously sweet voice. **

"Oh no, this does not look good," said Lily, shaking her head.

**Blood rushed into Professor McGonagall's face. **

**'Help?' she repeated, in a constricted voice. 'What do you mean, help?' **

**Professor Umbridge moved forwards into the office, still smiling her sickly smile. 'Why, I thought you might be grateful for a little extra authority.' **

"Well, you can shove your authority up your –!" began Sirius.

"Sirius!" interrupted Lily. "Umbitch is horrible, but please watch what you're saying."

**Harry would not have been surprised to see sparks fly from Professor McGonagall's nostrils. **

'**You thought wrong,' she said, turning her back on Umbridge. 'Now, you two had better listen closely. I do not care what provocation Malfoy offered you, I do not care if he insulted every family member you possess, your behaviour was disgusting and I am giving each of you a week's worth of detentions! Do not look at me like that, Potter, you deserve it! And if either of you ever -'**

_**Hem**_**hem**

**Professor McGonagall closed her eyes as though praying for patience as she turned her face towards Professor Umbridge again. **

**'Yes?'**

'**I think they deserve rather more than detentions,' said Umbridge, smiling still more broadly. **

"But since McGonagall is their Head of House, it's what she decides that counts," said James.

**Professor McGonagall's eyes flew open. **

'**But unfortunately,' she said, with an attempt at a reciprocal smile that made her look as though she had lockjaw, 'it is what I think that counts, as they are in my House, Dolores.' **

**'Well,****actually****, Minerva,' simpered Professor Umbridge, 'I think you'll find that what I think **_**does **_**count. Now, where is it? Cornelius just sent it… I mean,' she gave a false little laugh as she rummaged in her handbag, 'the Minister just sent it… ah yes…' **

**She had pulled out a piece of parchment which she now unfurled, clearing her throat fussily before starting to read what it said. **

**"Hem, hem… 'Educational Decree Number Twenty-five'."**

"Not another one!" said Peter, groaning. "Is this one going to give Umbitch power to overrule McGonagall?"

'**Not another one!' exclaimed Professor McGonagall violently. **

**'Well, yes,' said Umbridge, still smiling. 'As a matter of fact, Minerva, it was you who made me see that we ****needed**** a further amendment… you remember how you overrode me, when I was unwilling to allow the Gryffindor Quidditch team to reform? How you took the case to Dumbledore, who insisted that the team be allowed to play? Well, now, I couldn't have that. I contacted the Minister at once, and he quite agreed with me that the High Inquisitor has to have the power to strip pupils of privileges, or she - that is to say, I - would have less authority than common teachers!**

"I knew nothing good would come out of McGonagall overriding Umbitch," said Remus, groaning.

"**And you see now, don't you, Minerva, how right I was in attempting to stop the Gryffindor team reforming? ****Dreadful**** tempers… anyway, I was reading out our amendment… ****hem, hem****… 'The High Inquisitor will henceforth have supreme authority over all punishments, sanctions and removal of privileges pertaining to the students of Hogwarts, and the power to alter such punishments, sanctions and removals of privileges as may have been ordered by other staff members. Signed, Cornelius Fudge, Minister for Magic, Order of Merlin First Class, etc., etc.'"**

**She rolled up the parchment and put it back into her handbag, still smiling. **

**'So… I really think I will have to ban these two from playing Quidditch ever again,' she said, looking from Harry to George and back again. **

"_What_!?!" shouted James, practically spitting in rage. "How dare she!"

"Maybe Dumbledore can overturn it," said Peter. "Surely Headmaster has more power than a High Inquisitor."

"Besides, it's only in effect as long as Umbitch is at Hogwarts," said Lily. "She'll be gone by the end of the year, since the Defence post is supposedly jinxed."

"I don't care!" snapped James. "I am going to kill that b!tch for what she did!"

Sirius was attempting to write down Umbridge's latest infaction, but he was so angry that he kept blotting the parchment. Once, he snapped the quill in half. At that point, he threw down the broken quill in frustration. Remus took a fresh quill and wrote down the Quidditch ban on the list for Sirius.

**Harry felt the Snitch fluttering madly in his hand. **

'**Ban us?' he said, and his voice sounded strangely distant. 'From playing… ever again?' **

**'Yes, Mr. Potter, I think a lifelong ban ought to do the trick,' said Umbridge, her smile widening still further as she watched him struggle to comprehend what she had said. 'You ****and**** Mr. Weasley here. And I think, to be safe, this young man's twin ought to be stopped, too - if his team-mates had not restrained him, I feel sure he would have attacked young Mr. Malfoy as well. **

"But Fred did nothing!" protested Sirius. "So why punish him?" He added to the Umbitch list, muttering angrily under his breath.

**I will want their broomsticks confiscated, of course; I shall keep them safely in my office, to make sure there is no infringement of my ban. But I am not unreasonable, Professor McGonagall,' she continued, turning back to Professor McGonagall who was now standing as still as though carved from ice, staring at her. 'The rest of the team can continue playing, I saw no signs of violence from any of****them****. Well… good afternoon to you.' **

**And with a look of the utmost satisfaction, Umbridge left the room, leaving a horrified silence in her wake. **

"Oh great, this is the worst year Harry's ever had," said Peter, sounding dismal.

**'Banned,' said Angelina in a hollow voice, late that evening in the common room. '****Banned****. No Seeker and no Beaters… what on earth are we going to do?' **

"Hold tryouts and get new ones," said Lily. "Though where you're going to find Beaters and a Seeker that's as good as the twins and Harry, I don't know."

**It did not feel as though they had won the match at all. Everywhere Harry looked there were disconsolate and angry faces; the team themselves were slumped around the fire, all apart from Ron, who had not been seen since the end of the match.**

'**It's just so unfair,' said Alicia numbly. 'I mean, what about Crabbe and that Bludger he hit after the whistle had been blown? Has she banned him?'**

**'No,' said Ginny miserably; she and Hermione were sitting on either side of Harry. 'He just got lines, I heard Montague laughing about it at dinner.' **

"But that's so unfair!" protested James. "Crabbe should be banned as well!"

'**And banning Fred when he didn't even do anything!' said Alicia furiously, pummelling her knee with her fist. **

'**It's not my fault I didn't,' said Fred, with a very ugly look on his face, 'I would've pounded the little scumbag to a pulp if you three hadn't been holding me back.' **

**Harry stared miserably at the dark window. Snow was falling. The Snitch he had caught earlier was now zooming around and around the common room; people were watching its progress as though hypnotised and Crookshanks was leaping from chair to chair, trying to catch it. **

'**I'm going to bed,' said Angelina, getting slowly to her feet. 'Maybe this will all turn out to have been a bad dream… maybe I'll wake up tomorrow and find we haven't played yet…' **

"That's not going to happen," said Sirius. "What a terrible day."

**Alicia and Katie soon followed her. Fred and George sloped off to bed some time later, glowering at everyone they passed, and Ginny went not long after that. Only Harry and Hermione were left beside the fire. **

'**Have you seen Ron?' Hermione asked in a low voice. **

**Harry shook his head. **

"He feels bad about his rubbish playing and is avoiding you guys," said Remus.

'**I think he's avoiding us,' said Hermione. 'Where do you think he -?' **

**But at that precise moment, there was a creaking sound behind them as the Fat Lady swung forwards and Ron came clambering through the portrait hole. He was very pale indeed and there was snow in his hair. When he saw Harry and Hermione, he stopped dead in his tracks. **

'**Where have you been?' said Hermione anxiously, springing up. **

**'Walking,' Ron mumbled. He was still wearing his Quidditch things. **

'**You look frozen,' said Hermione. 'Come and sit down!' **

**Ron walked to the fireside and sank into the chair furthest from Harry's, not looking at him. The stolen Snitch zoomed over their heads. 'I'm sorry,' Ron mumbled, looking at his feet. **

'**What for?' said Harry. **

'**For thinking I can play Quidditch,' said Ron. 'I'm going to resign first thing tomorrow.' **

"You can't," said James. "Otherwise there will be only three players left."

'**If you resign,' said Harry testily, 'there'll only be three players left on the team.' And when Ron looked puzzled, he said, 'I've been given a lifetime ban. So've Fred and George.' **

**'What?' Ron yelped. **

**Hermione told him the full story; Harry could not bear to tell it again. When she had finished, Ron looked more anguished than ever. **

'**This is all my fault –' **

"It is not!" exclaimed Peter. "It's not like you made Harry and George beat up Malfoy!"

'**You didn't ****make**** me punch Malfoy,' said Harry angrily. **

'**- If I wasn't so terrible at Quidditch –' **

'**- It's got nothing to do with that.' **

'**- It was that song that wound me up –' **

'**- It would've wound anyone up.'**

**Hermione got up and walked to the window, away from the argument, watching the snow swirling down against the pane. **

'**Look, drop it, will you!' Harry burst out. 'It's bad enough, without you blaming yourself for everything!' **

**Ron said nothing but sat gazing miserably at the damp hem of his robes. After a while he said in a dull voice, 'This is the worst I've ever felt in my life.' **

"Harry feels the same way," said Lily. "Oh, I really want to do something horrible to Umbitch. Maybe I'll force her to copy out every single book in the Hogwarts library with that blood quill of hers."

"That would be a suitable punishment," agreed Sirius. He jotted down the idea.

'**Join the club,' said Harry bitterly. **

**'Well,' said Hermione, her voice trembling slightly. 'I can think of one thing that might cheer you both up.' **

"Oh, and what would that be?" asked James sceptically.

'**Oh yeah?' said Harry sceptically. **

**'Yeah,' said Hermione, turning away from the pitch-black, snow-flecked window, a broad smile spreading across her face. 'Hagrid's back.' **

"Well, that is good news," said Peter. "I hope they go and visit Hagrid now."

"I'm sure they will," said Remus. "Here, I'll read next." He took the book.


	20. Hagrid's Tale

Author's Note: I am very sorry about the long time updating, but I was busy with _James and Jade North and the Philosopher's Stone_, an AU fic that I am collaborating with my sister, Lady Alianne. It will grow into a series, eventually, and we have many ideas for it. Changes will be made to canon, though not so much for the first book. Oh, if anyone has any suggestions for the other fic Lady Alianne and I are collaborating on, please let us know. It's entitled _A Different Future_, about what happens after the Marauders and Lily read the Harry Potter book, and we're have no ideas on how to make things interesting. I mean, once the Horcruxes are gone and the Potters' and Longbottoms' two kids defeat Voldemort, the wizarding world is peacful. There's nothing to worry about (unless a new dark lord comes to power), and we can't just write about the Black, Potter, Longbottom, Weasley, and Lovegood kids having fun together and going to Hogwarts without stuff like the Chamber of Secrets happening. It would get very boring quickly and nobody wants to read about sunshine and roses every single chapter.

This chapter is dedicated to lady clark of books, petites sorcieres, The Queen of Confusion, PadyandMoony, and LupinandHarry.

**CHAPTER TWENTY  
Hagrid's Tale  
Harry sprinted up to the boys' dormitories to fetch the Invisibility Cloak and the Marauder's Map from his trunk; he was so quick that he and Ron were ready to leave at least five minutes before Hermione hurried back down from the girls' dormitories, wearing scarf, gloves and one of her own knobbly elf hats.  
'Well, it's cold out there!' she said defensively, as Ron clicked his tongue impatiently.**

"True," said Lily. "I hope Harry's properly bundled up. I don't want him to catch cold."

**They crept through the portrait hole and covered themselves hastily in the Cloak - Ron had grown so much he now needed to crouch to prevent his feet showing - then, moving slowly and cautiously, they proceeded down the many staircases, pausing at intervals to check on the map for signs of Filch or Mrs Norris. They were lucky; they saw nobody but Nearly Headless Nick, who was gliding along absent-mindedly humming something that sounded horribly like 'Weasley is our King'. They crept across the Entrance Hall and out into the silent, snowy grounds. With a great leap of his heart, Harry saw little golden squares of light ahead and smoke coiling up from Hagrid's chimney. He set off at a quick march, the other two jostling and bumping along behind him. They crunched excitedly through the thickening snow until at last they reached the wooden front door. When Harry raised his fist and knocked three times, a dog started barking frantically inside.**

**'Hagrid, its us!' Harry called through the keyhole.**

**'Shoulda known!' said a gruff voice.**

"Well, of course," said James. "The trio are the only ones that are really close to Hagrid in the books and would visit him the instant they discover that he's back."

**They beamed at each other under the Cloak; they could tell by Hagrid's voice that he was pleased. 'Bin home three seconds... out the way, Fang... out the way, yeh dozy dog...'  
The bolt was drawn back, the door creaked open and Hagrid's head appeared in the gap. Hermione screamed.**

"Why would Hermione scream?" asked Peter. "Hagrid's not scary."

"Maybe something about his appearance frightened her," suggested Remus.

**'Merlin's beard, keep it down!' said Hagrid hastily, staring wildly over their heads. 'Under that Cloak, are yeh? Well, get in, get in!'**

**'I'm sorry!' Hermione gasped, as the three of them squeezed past Hagrid into the house and pulled the Cloak off themselves so he could see them. 'I just - oh, Hagrid!'**

**'It's nuthin', it's nuthin'!' said Hagrid hastily, shutting the door behind them and hurrying to close all the curtains, but Hermione continued to gaze up at him in horror.**

"It looks as if something about Hagrid did scare Hermione," said Sirius.

**Hagrid's hair was matted with congealed blood and his left eye had been reduced to a puffy slit amid a mass of purple and black bruising. There were many cuts on his face and hands, some of them still bleeding, and he was moving gingerly, which made Harry suspect broken ribs. **

"Oh dear," said Lily. "Hagrid doesn't look like his usual self."

"That's an understatement," said James. "I think the giants must have roughed him up."

**It was obvious that he had only just got home; a thick black travelling cloak lay over the back of a chair and a haversack large enough to carry several small children leaned against the wall inside the door. Hagrid himself, twice the size of a normal man, was now limping over to the fire and placing a copper kettle over it.**

**'What happened to you?' Harry demanded, while Fang danced around them all, trying to lick their faces.**

"Hagrid was with the giants," said Remus. "Probably to get them to try and join Dumbledore. But some of them must have attacked him."

**'Told yeh, nuthin',' said Hagrid firmly. 'Want a cuppa?'**

**'Come off it,' said Ron, 'you're in a right state!'**

**'I'm tellin' yeh, I'm fine,' said Hagrid, straightening up and turning to beam at them all, but wincing. 'Blimey, it's good ter see yeh three again - had good summers, did yeh?'**

"Not really," said Peter. "Moldywart's back, dementors attacked Harry and he was almost expelled, and there was a hearing."

**'Hagrid, you've been attacked!' said Ron.**

**'Fer the las' time, it's nuthin'!' said Hagrid firmly.**

"It is not nothing!" exclaimed Remus. "You've turned up with your face smashed into a bloody pulp! Obviously they'd be concerned."

**'Would you say it was nothing if one of us turned up with a pound of mince instead of a face?' Ron demanded.**

**'You ought to go and see Madam Pomfrey, Hagrid,' said Hermione anxiously, 'some of those cuts look nasty.'**

**'I'm dealin' with it, all righ'?' said Hagrid repressively.**

"How?" asked Lily. "It's not like you can heal yourself, Hagrid."

**He walked across to the enormous wooden table that stood in the middle of his cabin and twitched aside a tea towel that had been lying on it. Underneath was a raw, bloody, green-tinged steak slightly larger than the average car tyre.**

**'You're not going to eat that, are you, Hagrid?' said Ron, leaning in for a closer look. 'It looks poisonous.'**

**'It's s'posed ter look like that, it's dragon meat,' Hagrid said. 'An' I didn' get it ter eat.'**

**He picked up the steak and slapped it over the left side of his face. Greenish blood trickled down into his beard as he gave a soft moan of satisfaction. 'Tha's better. It helps with the stingin', yeh know.'**

"Yes, but it's not going to heal his face," said James worriedly. "He really needs to have Madam Pomfrey heal it."

**'So, are you going to tell us what's happened to you?' Harry asked.**

**'Can't, Harry. Top secret. More'n me job's worth ter tell yeh that.'**

**'Did the giants beat you up, Hagrid?' asked Hermione quietly.**

**Hagrid's fingers slipped on the dragon steak and it slid squelchily on to his chest.**

**'Giants?' said Hagrid, catching the steak before it reached his belt and slapping it back over his face, 'who said anythin' abou' giants? Who yeh bin talkin' to? Who's told yeh what I've - who's said I've bin - eh?'**

"Nobody," said Peter. "They've guessed, and so have we."

**'We guessed,' said Hermione apologetically.**

**'Oh, yeh did, did yeh?' said Hagrid, surveying her sternly with the eye that was not hidden by the steak.**

**'It was kind of... obvious,' said Ron. Harry nodded.**

**Hagrid glared at them, then snorted, threw the steak back on to the table and strode over to the kettle, which was now whistling. ****'Never known kids like you three fer knowin' more'n yeh oughta,' he muttered, splashing boiling water into three of his bucket-shaped mugs. "An' I'm not complimentin' yeh, neither. Nosy, some'd call it. Interferin'." ****But his beard twitched.**

"Obviously Hagrid isn't as annoyed as he sounds," said Sirius, grinning.

**'So you have been to look for giants?' said Harry, grinning as he sat down at the table.**

**Hagrid set tea in front of each of them, sat down, picked up his steak again and slapped it back over his face.**

**"Yeah, all righ'," he grunted, "I have."**

**'And you found them?' said Hermione in a hushed voice.**

**'Well, they're not that difficult ter find, ter be honest,' said Hagrid. 'Pretty big, see.'**

**'Where are they?' said Ron.**

**'Mountains,' said Hagrid unhelpfully.**

**'So why don't Muggles -?'**

"They do, but their deaths are hushed up," said Remus. "Probably put down as accidents due to avalanches and stuff."

**'They do,' said Hagrid darkly. 'On'y their deaths are always put down ter mountaineerin' accidents, aren' they?'  
He adjusted the steak a little so that it covered the worst of the bruising.**

**'Come on, Hagrid, tell us what you've been up to!' said Ron. 'Tell us about being attacked by the giants and Harry can tell you about being attacked by the Dementors -'**

**Hagrid choked in his mug and dropped his steak at the same time; a large quantity of spit, tea and dragon blood was sprayed over the table as Hagrid coughed and spluttered and the steak slid, with a soft splat, on to the floor.**

"Yuck!" they all exclaimed, making disgusted faces.

**'Whadda yeh mean, attacked by Dementors?' growled Hagrid.**

**'Didn't you know?' Hermione asked him, wide-eyed.**

"Obviously not," said Lily. "Then again, it was probably difficult for him to hear any news when he's away visiting the giants."

**'I don' know anythin' that's bin happenin' since I left. I was on a secret mission, wasn' I, didn' wan' owls followin' me all over the place - ruddy Dementors! Yeh're not serious?'**

**'Yeah, I am, they turned up in Little Whingmg and attacked my cousin and me, and then the Ministry of Magic expelled me -'**

**'WHAT?'**

"They didn't expell Harry in the end," said James. "He got off at his hearing."

**'- and I had to go to a hearing and everything, but tell us about the giants first.'**

**'You were expelled!'**

**'Tell us about your summer and I'll tell you about mine.'**

**Hagrid glared at him through his one open eye. Harry looked right back, an expression of innocent determination on his face.**

**'Oh, all righ',' Hagrid said in a resigned voice. ****He bent down and tugged the dragon steak out of Fang's mouth.**

"He's not going to put the steak back on his face, is he?" asked Remus. "Right after it was in Fang's mouth?"

**'Oh, Hagrid, don't, it's not hygien—' Hermione began, but Hagrid had already slapped the meat back over his swollen eye.**

"Yep, looks like it," said Sirius, wincing. "That's disgusting." The others nodded in agreement and made face.

**He took another fortifying gulp of tea, then said, 'Well, we set off righ' after term ended -'**

"We?" asked Peter. "Who else went with Hagrid?"

"Obviously Madam Maxime," responded Lily. "Hagrid mentioned something about talking Madam Maxime around in the last book."

**'Madame Maxime went with you, then?' Hermione interjected.**

**'Yeah, tha's righ',' said Hagrid, and a softened expression appeared on the few inches of face that were not obscured by beard or green steak. 'Yeah, it was jus' the pair of us. An' I'll tell yeh this, she's not afraid of roughin' it, Olympe. Yeh know, she's a fine, well-dressed woman, an' knowin' where we was goin' I wondered 'ow she'd feel abou' clamberin' over boulders an' sleepin' in caves an' tha', bu' she never complained once.'**

**'You knew where you were going?' Harry repeated. 'You knew where the giants were?'**

"Well, if Hagrid didn't know, Dumbledore would know and tell him," said Sirius.

**'Well, Dumbledore knew, an' he told us,' said Hagrid.**

**'Are they hidden?' asked Ron. 'Is it a secret, where they are?'**

**'Not really.' said Hagrid, shaking his shaggy head. 'It's jus' that mos' wizards aren' bothered where they are, 's long as it's a good long way away. But where they are is very difficult ter get ter, fer humans anyway, so we needed Dumbledore's instructions. Took us abou' a month ter get there -'**

**'A month?' said Ron, as though he had never heard of a journey lasting such a ridiculously long time. 'But - why couldn't you just grab a Portkey or something?'**

"Portkeys have to be authorised, so they're not going to risk having an unauthorised one," said James.

**There was an odd expression in Hagrid's unobscured eye as he surveyed Ron; it was almost pitying. 'We're bein' watched, Ron,' he said gruffly.**

**'What d'you mean?'**

**'Yeh don' understand,' said Hagrid. 'The Ministry's keepin' an eye on Dumbledore an' anyone they reckon's in league with 'im, an' -'**

**'We know about that,' said Harry quickly keen to hear the rest of Hagrid's story, 'we know about the Ministry watching Dumbledore -'**

**'So you couldn't use magic to get there?' asked Ron, looking thunderstruck, 'you had to act like Muggles all the way?'**

**'Well, not exactly all the way.' said Hagrid cagily. 'We jus' had ter be careful, 'cause Olympe an' me, we stick out a bit —'**

"Well, duh," said Peter. "You're half-giants and taller than humans!" Sirius and James chuckled.

**Ron made a stifled noise somewhere between a snort and a sniff and hastily took a gulp of tea.**

**'- so we're not hard ter follow. We was pretendin' we was goin' on holiday together, so we got inter France an' we made like we was headin' fer where Olympe's school is, 'cause we knew we was bein' tailed by someone from the Ministry. We had to go slow, 'cause I'm not really s'posed ter use magic an' we knew the Ministry'd be lookin' fer a reason ter run us in. But we managed ter give the berk tailin' us the slip round abou' Dee-John —'**

"That's good," said Remus. Seeing Peter's puzzled look, he added, "Hagrid means Dijon, a place in France."

**'Ooooh, Dijon?' said Hermione excitedly. 'I've been there on holiday, did you see -?'**

**She fell silent at the look on Ron's face.**

**'We chanced a bit o' magic after that an' it wasn' a bad journey. Ran inter a couple o' mad trolls on the Polish border an' I had a sligh' disagreement with a vampire in a pub in Minsk, bu' apart from tha' couldn't a bin smoother.  
'An' then we reached the place, an' we started trekkin' up through the mountains, lookin' fer signs of 'em...We had ter lay off the magic once we got near 'em. Partly 'cause they don' like wizards an' we didn' want ter put their backs up too soon, an' partly 'cause Dumbledore had warned us You-Know-Who was bound ter be after the giants an' all. Said it was odds on he'd sent a messenger off ter them already. Told us ter be very careful of drawin' attention ter ourselves as we got nearer in case there was Death Eaters around.'**

**Hagrid paused for a long draught of tea.**

**'Go on!' said Harry urgently.**

**'Found 'em,' said Hagrid baldly. 'Went over a ridge one nigh' an' there they was, spread ou' underneath us. Little fires burnin' below an' huge shadows... it was like watchin' bits o' the mountain movin'.'**

"How big are giants exactly?" asked Lily.

"I read that they're usually around twenty feet tall," responded Remus. "Some might be a few feet taller."

**'How big are they?' asked Ron in a hushed voice.**

**'Bout twenty feet,' said Hagrid casually. 'Some o' the bigger ones mighta bin twenty-five.'**

**'And how many were there?' asked Harry.**

**'I reckon abou' seventy or eighty,' said Hagrid.**

**'Is that all?' said Hermione.**

"Most likely," said James, sounding dismal. "Giants are dying out. Wizards killed some of them and when they're forced to live together like that, they get into fights and kill each other off."

**'Yep,' said Hagrid sadly, 'eighty left, an' there was loads once, musta bin a hundred diff'rent tribes from all over the world. Bu' they've bin dyin' out fer ages. Wizards killed a few, o' course, bu' mostly they killed each other, an' now they're dyin' out faster than ever. They're not made ter live bunched up together like tha'. Dumbledore says it's our fault, it was the wizards who forced 'em to go an' made 'em live a good long way from us an' they had no choice bu' ter stick together fer their own protection.'**

**'So,' said Harry, 'you saw them and then what?'**

**'Well, we waited till morning, didn' want ter go sneakin' up on 'em in the dark, fer our own safety,' said Hagrid. 'Bout three in the mornin' they fell asleep jus' where they was sittin'. We didn' dare sleep. Fer one thing, we wanted ter make sure none of 'em woke up an' came up where we were, an' fer another, the snorin' was unbelievable. Caused an avalanche near mornin'.**

**'Anyway, once it was light we wen' down ter see 'em.'**

**'Just like that?' said Ron, looking awestruck. 'You just walked right into a giant camp?'**

"Well, I'm sure they were told the right way about entering a giant camp," said Sirius.

**'Well, Dumbledore'd told us how ter do it,' said Hagrid. 'Give the Gurg gifts, show some respect, yeh know.'**

"What's the Gurg?" asked Peter curiously.

"It's the title giants give to their chief," answered James.

**'Give the what gifts?' asked Harry.**

**'Oh, the Gurg - means the chief.'**

**'How could you tell which one was the Gurg?' asked Ron.**

"Probably the biggest and ugliest of the lot," said Sirius, chuckling.

**Hagrid grunted in amusement. 'No problem,' he said. 'He was the biggest, the ugliest an' the laziest. Sittin' there waitin' ter be brought food by the others. Dead goats an' such like. Name o' Karkus. I'd put him at twenty-two, twenty-three feet an' the weight o' a couple o' bull elephants. Skin like rhino hide an' all.'**

**'And you just walked up to him?' said Hermione breathlessly.**

**'Well... down ter him, where he was lyin' in the valley. They was in this dip between four pretty high mountains, see, beside a mountain lake, an' Karkus was lyin' by the lake roarin' at the others ter feed him an' his wife. Olympe an' I went down the mountainside -'**

**'But didn't they try and kill you when they saw you?' asked Ron incredulously.**

**'It was def'nitely on some o' their minds,' said Hagrid, shrugging, 'but we did what Dumbledore told us ter do, which was ter hold our gift up high an' keep our eyes on the Gurg an' ignore the others. So tha's what we did. An' the rest of 'em went quiet an' watched us pass an' we got right up ter Karkus's feet an' we bowed an' put our present down in front o' him.'**

"What kind of present would you give a giant?" asked Lily.

"Well, giants like magic, except when it's being used against them," replied Remus. "So the gift would probably be along those lines."

**'What do you give a giant?' asked Ron eagerly. 'Food?'**

**'Nah, he can get food all righ' fer himself,' said Hagrid. 'We took him magic. Giants like magic, jus' don' like us usin' it against 'em. Anyway, that firs' day we gave 'im a branch o' Gubraithian fire.'**

"Wow!" they all exclaimed, except Peter.

"What's Grub- Gubr- that fire?" asked Peter.

"Everlasting fire," responded Lily. "It'll never die out. Professor Flitwick told us about it before, Peter."

**Hermione said, 'Wow!' softly, but Harry and Ron both frowned in puzzlement.**

**'A branch of -?'**

**'Everlasting fire,' said Hermione irritably, 'you ought to know that by now. Professor Flitwick's mentioned it at least twice in class!'**

"Well, obviously they weren't paying attention," said Sirius.

**"Well, anyway," said Hagrid quickly, intervening before Ron could answer back, "Dumbledore'd bewitched this branch to burn fer evermore, which isn' somethin' any wizard could do, an' so I lies it down in the snow by Karkus's feet and says, 'A gift to the Gurg of the giants from Albus Dumbledore, who sends his respectful greetings.'"**

**'And what did Karkus say?' asked Harry eagerly.**

**'Nothin',' said Hagrid. 'Didn' speak English.'**

"What?!" exclaimed Peter. "Is Hagrid kidding?"

Remus sighed. "No, Peter. Not all giants can speak English. I'm sure Karkus had the giants that can speak English translate for him."

**'You're kidding!'**

**'Didn' matter,' said Hagrid imperturbably, 'Dumbledore had warned us tha' migh' happen. Karkus knew enough to yell fer a couple o' giants who knew our lingo an' they translated fer us.'**

**'And did he like the present?' asked Ron.**

**"Oh yeah, it went down a storm once they understood what it was," said Hagrid, turning his dragon steak over to press the cooler side to his swollen eye. "Very pleased. So then I said, 'Albus Dumbledore asks the Gurg to speak with his messenger when he returns tomorrow with another gift.'"**

**'Why couldn't you speak to them that day?' asked Hermione.**

"It's best to take things slow when dealing with giants," said Sirius. "Impress them with nice gifts and show them that you keep promises and stuff."

**'Dumbledore wanted us ter take it very slow,' said Hagrid. 'Let 'em see we kept our promises. We'll come back tomorrow with another present, an' then we do come back with another present - gives a good impression, see? An' gives them time ter test out the firs' present an' find out it's a good one, an' get 'em eager fer more. In any case, giants like Karkus - overload 'em with information an' they'll kill yeh jus' to simplify things. So we bowed outta the way an' went off an' found ourselves a nice little cave ter spend that night in an' the followin' mornin' we went back an' this time we found Karkus sittin' up waitin' fer us lookin' all eager.'**

**'And you talked to him?'**

**'Oh yeah. Firs' we presented him with a nice battle helmet - goblin-made an' indestructible, yeh know - an' then we sat down an' we talked.'**

**'What did he say?'**

**'Not much,' said Hagrid. 'Listened mostly. Bu' there were good signs. He'd heard o' Dumbledore, heard he'd argued against the killin' o' the last giants in Britain. Karkus seemed ter be quite int'rested in what Dumbledore had ter say. An' a few o' the others, 'specially the ones who had some English, they gathered round an' listened too. **

"Well, that sounds promising," said Sirius. "Karkus knows Dumbledore's good and might be willing to side with Dumbledore."

**We were hopeful when we left that day. Promised ter come back next mornin' with another present...  
'Bu' that night it all wen' wrong.'**

"What happened?" asked Lily, sounding worried. "Did some of the giants not want to join Dumbledore and convinced Karkus to do the same?"

**'What d'you mean?' said Ron quickly.**

**'Well, like I say, they're not meant ter live together, giants,' said Hagrid sadly. 'Not in big groups like that. They can' help themselves, they half kill each other every few weeks. The men fight each other an' the women fight each other; the remnants of the old tribes fight each other, an' that's even without squabbles over food an' the best fires an' sleepin' spots. Yeh'd think, seein' as how their whole race is abou' finished, they'd lay off each other, bu' ... '**

"Oh no," groaned James, having a good idea what had happened. "I think there was a fight and Karkus was removed from power. Another giant took over as Gurg."

**Hagrid sighed deeply. ****'That night a fight broke out, we saw it from the mouth of our cave, lookin' down on the valley. Went on fer hours, yeh wouldn' believe the noise. An' when the sun came up the snow was scarlet an' his head was lyin' at the bottom o' the lake.'**

**'Whose head?' gasped Hermione.**

**'Karkus's,' said Hagrid heavily. 'There was a new Gurg, Golgomath.' **

"Oh no," gasped Peter. "Do you think the new Gurg's not willing to side with Dumbledore?"

"I think so," said Remus heavily. "He either doesn't want to have anything to do with humans, or he's going to join Voldemort."

**He sighed deeply. 'Well, we hadn' bargained on a new Gurg two days after we'd made friendly contact with the firs' one, an' we had a funny feelin' Golgomath wouldn' be so keen ter listen to us, bu' we had ter try.'**

**'You went to speak to him?' asked Ron incredulously. 'After you'd watched him rip off another giant's head?'**

**'Course we did,' said Hagrid, 'we hadn' gone all that way ter give up after two days! We wen' down with the next present we'd meant ter give ter Karkus.**

**"I knew it was no go before I'd opened me mouth. He was sitting there wearin' Karkus's helmet, leerin' at us as we got nearer. He's massive, one o' the biggest ones there. Black hair an' matchin' teeth an' a necklace o' bones. Human-lookin' bones, some of 'em. Well, I gave it a go - held out a great roll o' dragon skin - an' said, 'A gift fer the Gurg of the giants —' Nex' thing I knew, I was hangin' upside-down in the air by me feet, two of his mates had grabbed me."**

"Oh no!" gasped Lily, clapping a hand to her mouth. "How in heaven's name did he get out of there?"

"I'm sure Madam Maxime did some magic that allowed them to escape," answered James.

**Hermione clapped her hands to her mouth.**

**'How did you get out of that?' asked Harry.**

**'Wouldn'ta done if Olympe hadn' bin there,' said Hagrid. 'She pulled out her wand an' did some o' the fastes' spellwork I've ever seen. Ruddy marvellous. Hit the two holdin' me right in the eyes with Conjunctivitus Curses an' they dropped me straightaway - bu' we were in trouble then, 'cause we'd used magic against 'em, an' that's what giants hate abou' wizards. We had ter leg it an' we knew there was no way we was going ter be able ter march inter the camp again.'**

"That's terrible," said Peter. "So why did it take Hagrid so long to get home if he was only there for three days?"

**'Blimey, Hagrid,' said Ron quietly.**

**'So, how come it's taken you so long to get home if you were only there for three days?' asked Hermione.**

**'We didn' leave after three days!' said Hagrid, looking outraged. 'Dumbledore was relyin' on us!'**

**'But you've just said there was no way you could go back!'**

**'Not by daylight we couldn', no. We just had ter rethink a bit. Spent a couple o' days lyin' low up in the cave an' watchin'. An' wha' we saw wasn' good.'**

"Did the new Gurg rip off more heads or something?" asked Sirius, shuddering.

**'Did he rip off more heads?' asked Hermione, sounding squeamish.**

**'No,' said Hagrid, 'I wish he had.'**

**'What d'you mean?'**

**'I mean we soon found out he didn' object ter all wizards - just us.'**

Remus groaned. "Then that means he's siding with the Death Eaters."

**'Death Eaters?' said Harry quickly.**

**'Yep,' said Hagrid darkly. 'Couple of 'em were visitin' him ev'ry day, bringin' gifts ter the Gurg, an' he wasn' dangling them upside-down.'**

**'How d'you know they were Death Eaters?' said Ron.**

**'Because I recognised one of 'em,' Hagrid growled. 'Macnair, remember him? Bloke they sent ter kill Buckbeak? Maniac, he is. Likes killin' as much as Golgomath; no wonder they were gettin' on so well.'**

"Great," said James dismally. "The Death Eaters convinced the giants to join Voldemort."

**'So Macnairs persuaded the giants to join You-Know-Who?' said Hermione desperately.**

**'Hold yer Hippogriffs, I haven' finished me story yet!' said Hagrid indignantly, who, considering he had not wanted to tell them anything in the first place, now seemed to be rather enjoying himself. 'Me an' Olympe talked it over an' we agreed, jus' 'cause the Gurg looked like favourin' You-Know-Who didn' mean all of 'em would. We had ter try an' persuade some o' the others, the ones who hadn' wanted Golgomath as Gurg.'**

"Well, how would be able to tell which ones they were?" inquired Peter.

"I'm sure there's some way of telling," replied Lily. "Maybe it's the ones that are staying as far away from Golgomath as possible."

**'How could you tell which ones they were?' asked Ron.**

**'Well, they were the ones bein' beaten to a pulp, weren' they?' said Hagrid patiently. 'The ones with any sense were keepin' outta Golgomath's way, hidin' out in caves roun' the gully jus' like we were. So we decided we'd go pokin' round the caves by night an' see if we couldn' persuade a few o' them.'**

"They actually went poking around the caves at night looking for giants?" demanded Sirius, sounding impressed and awed.

**'You went poking around dark caves looking for giants?' said Ron, with awed respect in his voice.**

**'Well, it wasn' the giants who worried us most,' said Hagrid. 'We were more concerned abou' the Death Eaters. Dumbledore had told us before we wen' not ter tangle with 'em if we could avoid it, an' the trouble was they knew we was around — 'spect Golgomath told 'em abou' us. At night, when the giants were sleepin' an' we wanted ter be creepin' inter the caves, Macnair an' the other one were sneakin' round the mountains lookin' fer us. I was hard put to stop Olympe jumpin' out at 'em,' said Hagrid, the corners of his mouth lifting his wild beard, 'she was rarin' ter attack 'em... she's somethin' when she's roused, Olympe... fiery, yeh know... 'spect it's the French in her...'**

**Hagrid gazed misty-eyed into the fire. Harry allowed him thirty seconds of reminiscence before clearing his throat loudly. 'So, what happened? Did you ever get near any of the other giants?'**

**'What? Oh... oh, yeah, we did. Yeah, on the third night after Karkus was killed we crept outta the cave we'd bin hidin' in an' headed back down inter the gully, keepin' our eyes skinned fer the Death Eaters. Got inside a few o' the caves, no go - then, in abou' the sixth one, we found three giants hidin'.'**

**'Cave must've been cramped,' said Ron.**

**'Wasn' room ter swing a Kneazle,' said Hagrid.**

**'Didn't they attack you when they saw you?' asked Hermione.**

**'Probably woulda done if they'd bin in any condition,' said Hagrid, 'but they was badly hurt, all three o' them; Golgomath's lot had beaten 'em unconscious; they'd woken up an' crawled inter the nearest shelter they could find. Anyway, one o' them had a bit of English an' 'e translated fer the others, an' what we had ter say didn' seem ter go down too badly. So we kep' goin' back, visitin' the wounded... I reckon we had abou' six or seven o' them convinced at one poin'.'**

"That's great!" exclaimed Sirius. "Are the six or seven giants going to come here and help Dumbledore?"

"Sirius, weren't you paying attention?" demanded Remus. "Hagrid said 'at one point'!" That means they might not be convinced now!"

**'Six or seven?' said Ron eagerly. 'Well that's not bad - are they going to come over here and start fighting You-Know-Who with us?'**

**But Hermione said, "What do you mean 'at one point', Hagrid?"**

**Hagrid looked at her sadly.**

**'Golgomath's lot raided the caves. The ones tha' survived didn' wan' no more ter to do with us after that.'**

"So no giants are coming," said James sadly. "What rotten luck."

**'So... so there aren't any giants coming?' said Ron, looking disappointed.**

**'Nope,' said Hagrid, heaving a deep sigh as he turned over his steak and applied the cooler side to his face, 'but we did wha' we meant ter do, we gave 'em Dumbledore's message an' some o' them heard it an' I spect some o' them'll remember it. Jus' maybe, them that don' want ter stay around Golgomath'll move outta the mountains, an' there's gotta be a chance they'll remember Dumbledore's friendly to 'em... could be they'll come.'**

"I hope so," said Peter. "But it doesn't seem very likely now."

**Snow was filling up the window now. Harry became aware that the knees of his robes were soaked through: Fang was drooling with his head in Harry's lap.**

**'Hagrid?' said Hermione quietly after a while.**

**'Mmm?'**

**'Did you... was there any sign of... did you hear anything about your... your... mother while you were there?'**

**Hagrid's unobscured eye rested upon her and Hermione looked rather scared.**

**'I'm sorry... I... forget it -'**

**'Dead,' Hagrid grunted. 'Died years ago. They told me.'**

"Poor Hagrid," said Lily. "Though since his mother took off when he was little, Hagrid probably doesn't remember her much."

**'Oh... I'm... I'm really sorry,' said Hermione in a very small voice. Hagrid shrugged his massive shoulders.**

**'No need,' he said shortly. 'Can't remember her much. Wasn' a great mother.'**

**They were silent again. Hermione glanced nervously at Harry and Ron, plainly wanting them to speak. **

**'But you still haven't explained how you got in this state, Hagrid,' Ron said, gesturing towards Hagrid's bloodstained face.**

**'Or why you're back so late,' said Harry. 'Sirius says Madame Maxime got back ages ago -'**

**'Who attacked you?' said Ron.**

**'I haven' bin attacked!' said Hagrid emphatically. 'I -'**

**But the rest of his words were drowned in a sudden outbreak of rapping on the door. Hermione gasped; her mug slipped through her fingers and smashed on the floor; Fang yelped. All four of them stared at the window beside the ****doorway. The shadow of somebody small and squat rippled across the thin curtain.**

"Oh no, it's Umbitch!" exclaimed Remus. "They'd better hide or they'll be in big trouble!"

**'It's her!' Ron whispered.**

**'Get under here!' Harry said quickly; seizing the Invisibility Cloak, he whirled it over himself and Hermione while Ron tore around the table and dived under the Cloak as well. Huddled together, they backed away into a corner. Fang was barking madly at the door. Hagrid looked thoroughly confused.**

**'Hagrid, hide our mugs!'**

**Hagrid seized Harry and Ron's mugs and shoved them under the cushion in Fang's basket. Fang was now leaping up at the door; Hagrid pushed him out of the way with his foot and pulled it open.**

**Professor Umbridge was standing in the doorway wearing her green tweed cloak and a matching hat with earflaps. ****Lips pursed, she leaned back so as to see Hagrid's face; she barely reached his navel.**

**'So,' she said slowly and loudly, as though speaking to somebody deaf. 'You're Hagrid, are you?'**

**Without waiting for an answer she strolled into the room, her bulging eyes rolling in every direction.**

**'Get away,' she snapped, waving her handbag at Fang, who had bounded up to her and was attempting to lick her face.**

"Fang has absolutely no sense sometimes," said Sirius. "If I were him I would be growling at her."

**'Er - I don' want ter be rude,' said Hagrid, staring at her, 'but who the ruddy hell are you?'**

**'My name is Dolores Umbridge.'**

**Her eyes were sweeping the cabin. Twice they stared directly into the corner where Harry stood, sandwiched between Ron and Hermione.**

**'Dolores Umbridge?' Hagrid said, sounding thoroughly confused. 'I thought you were one o' them Ministry - don' you work with Fudge?'**

**'I was Senior Undersecretary to the Minister, yes,' said Umbridge, now pacing around the cabin, taking in every tiny detail within, from the haversack against the wall to the abandoned travelling cloak. 'I am now the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher -'**

**'Tha's brave of yeh,' said Hagrid, 'there's not many'd take tha' job any more.'**

**'- and Hogwarts High Inquisitor,' said Umbridge, giving no sign that she had heard him.**

**'Wha's that?' said Hagrid, frowning.**

**'Precisely what I was going to ask,' said Umbridge, pointing at the broken shards of china on the floor that had been Hermione's mug.**

"How is Hagrid going to explain that?" asked Peter.

"He could just say that he accidentally broke it," responded James.

**'Oh,' said Hagrid, with a most unhelpful glance towards the corner where Harry, Ron and Hermione stood hidden, 'oh, tha' was... was Fang. He broke a mug. So I had ter use this one instead.'**

"Well, that also works," said Remus. "Though he shouldn't have glanced at that corner. That's suspicious."

**Hagrid pointed to the mug from which he had been drinking, one hand still clamped over the dragon steak pressed to his eye. Umbridge stood facing him now, taking in every detail of his appearance instead of the cabin's.**

**'I heard voices,' she said quietly.**

**'I was talkin' ter Fang,' said Hagrid stoutly.**

**'And was he talking back to you?'**

**'Well... in a manner o' speakin',' said Hagrid, looking uncomfortable. 'I sometimes say Fang's near enough human -'**

"Okay, Hagrid's not the best of liars," said Lily, shaking her head.

**'There are three sets of footprints in the snow leading from the castle doors to your cabin,' said Umbridge sleekly.**

"Why didn't they think of wiping away the footprints?" asked Remus.

**Hermione gasped; Harry clapped a hand over her mouth. Luckily, Fang was sniffing loudly around the hem of Professor Umbridge's robes and she did not appear to have heard.**

**'Well, I on'y jus' got back,' said Hagrid, waving an enormous hand at the haversack. 'Maybe someone came ter call earlier an' I missed 'em.'**

**'There are no footsteps leading away from your cabin door.'**

"Darn!" exclaimed Sirius. "She's too observant."

**'Well, I... I don' know why that'd be...' said Hagrid, tugging nervously at his beard and again glancing towards the corner where Harry, Ron and Hermione stood, as though asking for help. 'Erm...'**

**Umbridge wheeled round and strode the length of the cabin, looking around carefully. She bent and peered under the bed. She opened Hagrid's cupboards. She passed within two inches of where Harry, Ron and Hermione stood pressed against the wall; Harry actually pulled in his stomach as she walked by. After looking carefully inside the enormous cauldron Hagrid used for cooking, she wheeled round again and said, 'What has happened to you? How did you sustain those injuries?'**

**Hagrid hastily removed the dragon steak from his face, which in Harry's opinion was a mistake, because the black and purple bruising all around his eye was now clearly visible, not to mention the large amount of fresh and congealed blood on his face. 'Oh, I ... had a bit of an accident,' he said lamely.**

"Definitely not a good liar," said James.

**'What sort of accident?'**

**'I - I tripped.'**

**'You tripped,' she repeated coolly.**

**'Yeah, tha's right. Over... over a friend's broomstick. I don' fly, meself. Well, look at the size o' me, I don' reckon there's a broomstick that'd hold me. Friend o' mine breeds Abraxan horses, I dunno if you've ever seen 'em, big beasts, winged, yeh know, I've had a bit of a ride on one o' them an' it was -'**

"Okay, stop babbling," said Peter. "It's not helping, Hagrid."

**'Where have you been?' asked Umbridge, cutting coolly through Hagrid's babbling.**

**'Where've I -?'**

**'Been, yes,' she said. 'Term started two months ago. Another teacher has had to cover your classes. None of your colleagues has been able to give me any information as to your whereabouts. You left no address. Where have you been?'**

**There was a pause in which Hagrid stared at her with his newly uncovered eye. Harry could almost hear his brain working furiously.**

**'I - I've been away for me health,' he said.**

"I don't think Umbridge is going to believe that," said Lily.

**'For your health,' repeated Professor Umbridge. Her eyes travelled over Hagrid's discoloured and swollen face; dragon blood dripped gently and silently on to his waistcoat. 'I see.'**

**'Yeah,' said Hagrid, 'bit o' - o' fresh air, yeh know -'**

**'Yes, as gamekeeper fresh air must be so difficult to come by,' said Umbridge sweetly. The small patch of Hagrid's face that was not black or purple, flushed.**

"This is not good," said Peter. "If only Hagrid were a better liar. Like Sirius."

"Except that some of Sirius's lies are too outrageous," pointed out Remus. "Though on the other hand, they way he tells them doesn't show that he's lying."

**'Well — change o' scene, yeh know -'**

**'Mountain scenery?' said Umbridge swiftly.**

"Oh no, she knows!" gasped James. "This is really not good."

**She knows, Harry thought desperately.**

**'Mountains?' Hagrid repeated, clearly thinking fast. 'Nope, South o' France fer me. Bit o' sun an' ... an' sea.'**

**'Really?' said Umbridge. 'You don't have much of a tan.'**

**'Yeah... well... sensitive skin,' said Hagrid, attempting an ingratiating smile. Harry noticed that two of his teeth had been knocked out. Umbridge looked at him coldly; his smile faltered. Then she hoisted her handbag a little higher into the crook of her arm and said, 'I shall, of course, be informing the Minister of your late return.'**

**'Righ',' said Hagrid, nodding.**

**'You ought to know, too, that as High Inquisitor it is my unfortunate but necessary duty to inspect my fellow teachers. So I daresay we shall meet again soon enough.'**

"And since Umbitch hates 'half-breeds', what's the bet that she'll purposely put Hagrid on probabtion?" remarked Sirius. "And she'll probably pick the class Harry's in and only ask the Slytherins about Hagrid's teaching."

**She turned sharply and marched back to the door.**

**'You're inspectin' us?' Hagrid repeated blankly, looking after her.**

**'Oh, yes,' said Umbridge softly, looking back at him with her hand on the door handle. 'The Ministry is determined to weed out unsatisfactory teachers, Hagrid. Goodnight.'**

"This is horrible!" burst out Lily. "Umbitch will definitely find Hagrid unsatisfactory."

**She left, closing the door behind her with a snap. Harry made to pull off the Invisibility Cloak but Hermione seized his wrist.**

**'Not yet,' she breathed in his ear. 'She might not be gone yet.'  
Hagrid seemed to be thinking the same way; he stumped across the room and pulled back the curtain an inch or so.**

**'She's goin' back ter the castle,' he said in a low voice. 'Blimey... inspectin' people, is she?'**

"Yes, she is," said Peter. "Trelawney's already on probation and she'll likely do the same to you."

**'Yeah,' said Harry, pulling off the Cloak. 'Trelawney's on probation already...'**

**'Um... what sort of thing are you planning to do with us in class, Hagrid?' asked Hermione.**

**'Oh, don' you worry abou' that, I've got a great load o' lessons planned,' said Hagrid enthusiastically, scooping up his dragon steak from the table and slapping it over his eye again. 'I've bin keepin' a couple o' creatures saved fer yer OWL year; you wait, they're somethin' really special.'**

"This does not bode well," said Remus. "I don't think he's planning to do stuff like Crups and Knarls."

**'Erm... special in what way?' asked Hermione tentatively.**

**'I'm not sayin',' said Hagrid happily. 'I don' want ter spoil the surprise.'**

**'Look, Hagrid,' said Hermione urgently, dropping all pretence, 'Professor Umbridge won't be at all happy if you bring anything to class that's too dangerous.'**

**'Dangerous?' said Hagrid, looking genially bemused. 'Don' be silly, I wouldn' give yeh anythin' dangerous! I mean, all righ', they can look after themselves -'**

**'Hagrid, you've got to pass Umbridge's inspection, and to do that it would really be better if she saw you teaching us how to look after Porlocks, how to tell the difference between Knarls and hedgehogs, stuff like that!' said Hermione earnestly.**

**'But tha's not very interestin', Hermione,' said Hagrid. 'The stuff I've got's much more impressive. I've bin bringin' 'em on fer years, I reckon I've got the on'y domestic herd in Britain.'**

"Well, it can't be too dangerous then," said Sirius uncertainly. "But Hagrid still should stick to Porlocks and stuff."

"I wonder what he's planning to show," said James. "It can't be hippogriffs again. Maybe it could be thestrals, because the ones pulling the school carriages are a domestic herd."

"But we don't know if they're the only domestic herd in Britain," pointed out Lily. "Though I hope it does turn out to be thestrals, because they're not really dangerous creatures at all."

**'Hagrid... please...' said Hermione, a note of real desperation in her voice. 'Umbridge is looking for any excuse to get rid of teachers she thinks are too close to Dumbledore. Please, Hagrid, teach us something dull that's bound to come up in our OWL.'**

"I don't know if Hagrid will listen to you, Hermione," said Peter.

**But Hagrid merely yawned widely and cast a one-eyed look of longing towards the vast bed in the corner.**

**'Lis'en, it's bin a long day an' it's late,' he said, patting Hermione gently on the shoulder, so that her knees gave way and hit the floor with a thud. 'Oh - sorry -' He pulled her back up by the neck of her robes. 'Look, don' you go worryin' abou' me, I promise yeh I've got really good stuff planned fer yer lessons now I'm back... now you lot had better get back up to the castle, an' don' forget ter wipe yer footprints out behind yeh!'**

"Well, that's good advice," said Remus. "But Hagrid really needs to listen to Hermione and plan his lessons along the lines of the ones Professor Grubbly-Plank had."

**'I dunno if you got through to him,' said Ron a short while later when, having checked that the coast was clear, they walked back up to the castle through the thickening snow, leaving no trace behind them due to the Obliteration Charm Hermione was performing as they went.**

**'Then I'll go back again tomorrow,' said Hermione determinedly. 'I'll plan his lessons for him if I have to. I don't care if she throws out Trelawney but she's not getting rid of Hagrid!'**

"Yeah," said Sirius. "If Umbitch sacks Hagrid I will think up the worst punishment in the world for her. Who's reading next?"

"I will," volunteered James. He took the book and flipped to the next chapter.


	21. The Eye of the Snake

Happy Easter, everyone!

This chapter is dedicated to iLoVeMoOnYnPaDfOoT, Blueshadows2010, montogma, Gred Forge vs Marauder, and LilyGinnyBlack.

**— CHAPTER TWENTY‐ONE —  
The Eye of the Snake**

"What kind of chapter title is that?" asked Peter.

"We'll just have to read the chapter and find out," answered Remus, shrugging.

**Hermione ploughed her way back to Hagrid's cabin through two feet of snow on Sunday morning. Harry and Ron wanted to go with her, but their mountain of homework had reached an alarming height again, so they remained grudgingly in the common room, trying to ignore the gleeful shouts drifting up from the grounds outside, where students were enjoying themselves skating on the frozen lake, tobogganing and, worst of all, bewitching snowballs to zoom up to Gryffindor Tower and rap hard on the windows.**

**'Oi!' bellowed Ron, finally losing patience and sticking his head out of the window, 'I am a prefect and if one more snowball hits this window ‐ OUCH!'**

**He withdrew his head sharply, his face covered in snow.  
'It's Fred and George,' he said bitterly, slamming the window behind him. 'Gits...'**

"I bet the twins did that on purpose," said James, chuckling.

**Hermione returned from Hagrid's just before lunch, shivering slightly, her robes damp to the knees.**

**'So?' said Ron, looking up when she entered. 'Got all his lessons planned for him?'**

**'Well, I tried,' she said dully, sinking into a chair beside Harry. She pulled out her wand and gave it a complicated little wave so that hot air streamed out of the tip; she then pointed this at her robes, which began to steam as they dried out. 'He wasn't even there when I arrived, I was knocking for at least half an hour. And then he came stumping out of the Forest ‐'**

They all groaned. "This does not sound good," said Lily. "Anything from the forest, other than unicorns, aren't suitable."

**Harry groaned. The Forbidden Forest was teeming with the kind of creatures most likely to get Hagrid the sack. 'What's he keeping in there? Did he say?' he asked.**

**'No,' said Hermione miserably. 'He says he wants them to be a surprise. I tried to explain about Umbridge, but he just doesn't get it. He kept saying nobody in their right mind would rather study Knarls than Chimaeras ‐ oh, I don't think he's got a Chimaera,' she added at the appalled look on Harry and Ron's faces, 'but that's not for lack of trying, from what he said about how hard it is to get eggs. I don't know how many times I told him he'd be better off following Grubbly‐Plank's plan, I honestly don't think he listened to half of what I said. He's in a bit of a funny mood, you know. He still won't say how he got all those injuries.'**

"Why won't Hagrid listen to Hermione?" asked Sirius, sounding miserable. "I don't want him sacked or on probation."

**Hagrid's reappearance at the staff table at breakfast next day was not greeted by enthusiasm from all students. Some, like Fred, George and Lee, roared with delight and sprinted up the aisle between the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff tables to wring Hagrid's enormous hand; others, like Parvati and Lavender, exchanged gloomy looks and shook their heads. Harry knew that many of them preferred Professor Grubbly‐Plank's lessons, and the worst of it was that a very small, unbiased part of him knew that they had good reason: Grubbly‐Plank's idea of an interesting class was not one where there was a risk that somebody might have their head ripped off.**

"True," said Peter, shaking his head. "I'm dreading the lesson."

**It was with a certain amount of apprehension that Harry, Ron and Hermione headed down to Hagrid's on Tuesday, heavily muffled against the cold. Harry was worried, not only about what Hagrid might have decided to teach them, but also about how the rest of the class, particularly Malfoy and his cronies, would behave if Umbridge was watching them.**

**However, the High Inquisitor was nowhere to be seen as they struggled through the snow towards Hagrid, who stood waiting for them on the edge of the Forest. He did not present a reassuring sight; the bruises that had been purple on Saturday night were now tinged with green and yellow and some of his cuts still seemed to be bleeding. Harry could not understand this: had Hagrid perhaps been attacked by some creature whose venom prevented the wounds it inflicted from healing? As though to complete the ominous picture, Hagrid was carrying what looked like half a dead cow over his shoulder.**

"So whatever creature Hagrid is showing eats meat," said Sirius slowly. "I just hope it's not too dangerous."

"Well, at least it can't be Blast-Ended Skwerts again," said James, in an attempt to look on the bright side.

**'We're workin' in here today!' Hagrid called happily to the approaching students, jerking his head back at the dark trees behind him. 'Bit more sheltered! Anyway, they prefer the dark.'**

**'What prefers the dark?' Harry heard Malfoy say sharply to Crabbe and Goyle, a trace of panic in his voice. 'What did he say prefers the dark ‐ did you hear?'**

**Harry remembered the only other occasion on which Malfoy had entered the Forest before now; he had not been very brave then, either. He smiled to himself; after the Quidditch match anything that caused Malfoy discomfort was all right with him.**

They all chuckled.

**'Ready?' said Hagrid cheerfully, looking around at the class. 'Right, well, I've bin savin' a trip inter the Forest fer yer fifth year. Thought we'd go an' see these creatures in their natural habitat. Now, what we're studyin' today is pretty rare, I reckon I'm probably the on'y person in Britain who's managed ter train 'em.'**

"It doesn't sound too bad," said Remus hopefully. "Not if Hagrid's managed to train them."

**'And you're sure they're trained, are you?' said Malfoy, the panic in his voice even more pronounced. 'Only it wouldn't be the first time you'd brought wild stuff to class, would it?'  
The Slytherins murmured agreement and a few Gryffindors looked as though they thought Malfoy had a fair point, too.**

**'Course they're trained,' said Hagrid, scowling and hoisting the dead cow a little higher on his shoulder.**

**'So what happened to your face, then?' demanded Malfoy.**

"Mind your own business, Malfoy!" snapped Lily.

**'Mind yer own business!' said Hagrid, angrily. 'Now, if yeh've finished askin' stupid questions, follow me!'**

**He turned and strode straight into the Forest. Nobody seemed much disposed to follow. Harry glanced at Ron and Hermione, who sighed but nodded, and the three of them set off after Hagrid, leading the rest of the class.**

**They walked for about ten minutes until they reached a place where the trees stood so closely together that it was as dark as twilight and there was no snow at all on the ground. With a grunt, Hagrid deposited his half a cow on the ground, stepped back and turned to face his class, most of whom were creeping from tree to tree towards him, peering around nervously as though expecting to be set upon at any moment.**

**'Gather roun', gather roun',' Hagrid encouraged. 'Now, they'll be attracted by the smell o' the meat but I'm goin' ter give 'em a call anyway, 'cause they'll like ter know it's me.'**

**He turned, shook his shaggy head to get the hair out of his face and gave an odd, shrieking cry that echoed through the dark trees like the call of some monstrous bird. Nobody laughed: most of them looked too scared to make a sound.  
Hagrid gave the shrieking cry again. A minute passed in which the class continued to peer nervously over their shoulders and around trees for a first glimpse of whatever it was that was coming. And then, as Hagrid shook his hair back for a third time and expanded his enormous chest, Harry nudged Ron and pointed into the black space between two gnarled yew trees.**

**A pair of blank, white, shining eyes were growing larger through the gloom and a moment later the dragonish face, neck and then skeletal body of a great, black, winged horse emerged from the darkness. It surveyed the class for a few seconds, swishing its long black tail, then bowed its head and began to tear flesh from the dead cow with its pointed fangs.**

They all gave a great sigh of relief. "It's thestrals," said Lily. "They're not too dangerous or anything."

**A great wave of relief broke over Harry. Here at last was proof that he had not imagined these creatures, that they were real: Hagrid knew about them too. He looked eagerly at Ron, but Ron was still staring around into the trees and after a few seconds he whispered, 'Why doesn't Hagrid call again?'**

**Most of the rest of the class were wearing expressions as confused and nervously expectant as Ron's and were still gazing everywhere but at the horse standing feet from them. There were only two other people who seemed to be able to see them: a stringy Slytherin boy standing just behind Goyle was watching the horse eating with an expression of great distaste on his face; and Neville, whose eyes were following the swishing progress of the long black tail.**

**'Oh, an' here comes another one!' said Hagrid proudly, as a second black horse appeared out of the dark trees, folded its leathery wings closer to its body and dipped its head to gorge on the meat. 'Now... put yer hands up, who can see 'em?'  
Immensely pleased to feel that he was at last going to understand the mystery of these horses, Harry raised his hand. Hagrid nodded at him.**

**'Yeah… yeah, I knew you'd be able ter, Harry,' he said seriously. 'An' you too, Neville, eh? An' ‐'**

**'Excuse me,' said Malfoy in a sneering voice, 'but what exactly are we supposed to be seeing?'**

**For an answer, Hagrid pointed at the cow carcass on the ground. The whole class stared at it for a few seconds, then several people gasped and Parvati squealed. Harry understood why: bits of flesh stripping themselves away from the bones and vanishing into thin air had to look very odd indeed.**

**'What's doing it?' Parvati demanded in a terrified voice, retreating behind the nearest tree. 'What's eating it?'**

"Thestrals are eating it," responded Sirius, rolling his eyes.

**'Thestrals,' said Hagrid proudly and Hermione gave a soft 'Oh!' of comprehension at Harry's shoulder. 'Hogwarts has got a whole herd of 'em in here. Now, who knows ‐?'**

**'But they're really, really unlucky!' interrupted Parvati, looking alarmed. 'They're supposed to bring all sorts of horrible misfortune on people who see them. Professor Trelawney told me once ‐'**

**'No, no, no,' said Hagrid, chuckling, 'tha's jus' superstition, that is, they aren' unlucky, they're dead clever an' useful! Course, this lot don' get a lot o' work, it's mainly jus' pullin' the school carriages unless Dumbledore's takin' a long journey an' don' want ter Apparate ‐ an' here's another couple, look ‐'**

**Two more horses came quietly out of the trees, one of them passing very close to Parvati, who shivered and pressed herself closer to the tree, saying, 'I think I felt something, I think it's near me!'**

"It's not going to attack you!" exclaimed James, sounding slightly exasperated.

**'Don' worry, it won' hurt yeh,' said Hagrid patiently. 'Righ', now, who can tell me why some o' yeh can see 'em an' some can't?'**

**Hermione raised her hand.  
'Go on then,' said Hagrid, beaming at her.**

**'The only people who can see Thestrals,' she said, 'are people who have seen death.'**

**'Tha's exactly right,' said Hagrid solemnly, 'ten points ter Gryffindor. Now, Thestrals ‐'**

**'Hem, hem.'**

"Oh great, Umbitch has arrived," groaned Peter.

**Professor Umbridge had arrived. She was standing a few feet away from Harry, wearing her green hat and cloak again, her clipboard at the ready. Hagrid, who had never heard Umbridge's fake cough before, was gazing in some concern at the closest Thestral, evidently under the impression that it had made the sound.**

**'Hem, hem.'**

**'Oh, hello!' Hagrid said, smiling, having located the source of the noise.**

**'You received the note I sent to your cabin this morning?' said Umbridge, in the same loud, slow voice she had used with him earlier, as though she were addressing somebody both foreign and very slow. **

"Just because Hagrid is half-giant doesn't mean he's less smart than anyone else!" snapped Remus.

**'Telling you that I would be inspecting your lesson?'**

**'Oh, yeah,' said Hagrid brightly. 'Glad yeh found the place all righ'! Well, as you can see ‐ or, I dunno ‐ can you? We're doin' Thestrals today ‐'**

**'I'm sorry?' said Professor Umbridge loudly, cupping her hand around her ear and frowning. 'What did you say?'  
Hagrid looked a little confused.**

**'Er ‐ Thestrals!' he said loudly. 'Big ‐ er ‐ winged horses, yeh know!'**

**He flapped his gigantic arms hopefully. Professor Umbridge raised her eyebrows at him and muttered as she made a note on her clipboard: 'Has... to... resort... to... crude... sign... language.'**

"How dare she!" cried Lily, outraged. "I thought she might do something to purposely get Hagrid to fail his inspection, but I never thought she'd do this!"

**'Well... anyway...' said Hagrid, turning back to the class and looking slightly flustered, 'erm... what was I sayin'?'**

**'Appears... to... have... poor... short... term... memory,' muttered Umbridge, loudly enough for everyone to hear her. Draco Malfoy looked as though Christmas had come a month early; Hermione, on the other hand, had turned scarlet with suppressed rage.**

They all looked angry. James began muttering curses under his breath, and Sirius added to the Umbridge list.

**'Oh, yeah,' said Hagrid, throwing an uneasy glance at Umbridge's clipboard, but ploughing on valiantly. 'Yeah, I was gonna tell yeh how come we got a herd. Yeah, so, we started off with a male an' five females. This one,' he patted the first horse to have appeared, 'name o' Tenebrus, he's my special favourite, firs' one born here in the Forest ‐'**

**'Are you aware,' Umbridge said loudly, interrupting him, "that the Ministry of Magic has classified Thestrals as 'dangerous'?"**

"They're not really dangerous!" snapped James. "They're like hippogriffs, who don't attack unless somebody really annoys them or they're threatened."

**Harry's heart sank like a stone, but Hagrid merely chuckled.**

**'Thestrals aren' dangerous! All righ', they might take a bite outta yeh if yeh really annoy them ‐'**

**'Shows... signs... of... pleasure... at... idea... of... violence,' muttered Umbridge, scribbling on her clipboard again.**

**'No ‐ come on!' said Hagrid, looking a little anxious now. 'I mean, a dog'll bite if yeh bait it, won' it ‐ but Thestrals have jus' got a bad reputation because o' the death thing ‐ people used ter think they were bad omens, didn' they? Jus' didn' understand, did they?'**

**Umbridge did not answer; she finished writing her last note, then looked up at Hagrid and said, again very loudly and slowly, 'Please continue teaching as usual. I am going to walk,' she mimed walking (Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson were having silent fits of laughter) 'among the students' (she pointed around at individual members of the class) 'and ask them questions.' She pointed at her mouth to indicate talking.**

Sirius had not bothered to set down his quill at all, but kept it poised over the parchment, adding to his list when necessary. James's voice was full of suppressed rage as he read and he practically spat out everything Umbridge was saying.

**Hagrid stared at her, clearly at a complete loss to understand why she was acting as though he did not understand normal English. Hermione had tears of fury in her eyes now.**

**'You hag, you evil hag!' she whispered, as Umbridge walked towards Pansy Parkinson. 'I know what you're doing, you awful, twisted, vicious ‐'**

"We agree completely, Hermione," muttered Sirius darkly.

**'Erm... anyway,' said Hagrid, clearly struggling to regain the flow of his lesson, 'so ‐ Thestrals. Yeah. Well, there's loads o' good stuff abou' them...'**

**'Do you find,' said Professor Umbridge in a ringing voice to Pansy Parkinson, 'that you are able to understand Professor Hagrid when he talks?'**

**Just like Hermione, Pansy had tears in her eyes, but these were tears of laughter; indeed, her answer was almost incoherent because she was trying to suppress her giggles.  
'No... because... well... it sounds... like grunting a lot of the time."**

"It does not!" exclaimed Peter indignantly. "Sure, Hagrid has an accent, but we can understand him fine!"

**Umbridge scribbled on her clipboard. The few unbruised bits of Hagrid's face flushed, but he tried to act as though he had not heard Pansy's answer.**

**'Er... yeah... good stuff abou' Thestrals. Well, once they're tamed, like this lot, yeh'll never be lost again. 'Mazin' sense o' direction, jus' tell 'em where yeh want ter go ‐'**

**'Assuming they can understand you, of course,' said Malfoy loudly, and Pansy Parkinson collapsed in a fit of renewed giggles. Professor Umbridge smiled indulgently at them and then turned to Neville.**

**'You can see the Thestrals, Longbottom, can you?' she said.  
Neville nodded.**

**'Who did you see die?' she asked, her tone indifferent.**

**'My... my grandad,' said Neville.**

**'And what do you think of them?' she said, waving her stubby hand at the horses, who by now had stripped a great deal of the carcass down to bone.**

**'Erm,' said Neville nervously, with a glance at Hagrid. 'Well, they're... er... OK...'**

**'Students... are... too... intimidated... to... admit... they... are... frightened,' muttered Umbridge, making another note on her clipboard.**

"The foul, twisted hag!" cried Remus. "Neville's not frightened of the thestrals! He's just nervous about not making Hagrid look good."

**'No!' said Neville, looking upset. 'No, I'm not scared of them!'**

**'It's quite all right,' said Umbridge, patting Neville on the shoulder with what she evidently intended to be an understanding smile, though it looked more like a leer to Harry. 'Well, Hagrid,' she turned to look up at him again, speaking once more in that loud, slow voice, 'I think I've got enough to be getting along with. You will receive' (she mimed taking something from the air in front of her) 'the results of your inspection' (she pointed at the clipboard) 'in ten days' time.' She held up ten stubby little fingers, then, her smile wider and more toadlike than ever before beneath her green hat, she bustled from their midst, leaving Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson in fits of laughter, Hermione actually shaking with fury and Neville looking confused and upset.**

"Oh, when I get my hands on her," muttered Sirius, finally putting down his quill.

"Forcing her to copy out the entire Bible with the Blood Quill isn't enough punishment for her!" snapped Lily, causing the others to look at her in surprise.

Remus raised a brow. "Are you sure, Lily? The Bible is probably the longest book in existance, and Umbridge would run out of blood before she was halfway through the Old Testament."

"Yes, I'm sure!" retorted Lily. "We can feed Umbitch blood replenshing potions while she's writing so she can copy out the entire Bible. Then we can devise some other punishments for her."

"Remind me to never get you angry, Lily," said James. "I don't want to know what revenge you'd get on me."

**'That foul, lying, twisting old gargoyle!' stormed Hermione half an hour later, as they made their way back up to the castle through the channels they had made earlier in the snow. 'You see what she's up to? It's her thing about half-breeds all over again ‐ she's trying to make out Hagrid's some kind of dimwitted troll, just because he had a giantess for a mother ‐ and oh, it's not fair, that really wasn't a bad lesson at all ‐ I mean, all right, if it had been Blast‐Ended Skrewts again, but Thestrals are fine ‐ in fact, for Hagrid, they're really good!'**

Peter nodded.

**'Umbridge said they're dangerous,' said Ron.**

**'Well, it's like Hagrid said, they can look after themselves,' said Hermione impatiently, 'and I suppose a teacher like Grubbly‐Plank wouldn't usually show them to us before NEWT level, but, well, they are very interesting, aren't they? The way some people can see them and some can't! I wish I could.'**

**'Do you?' Harry asked her quietly.**

**She looked suddenly horrorstruck.  
'Oh, Harry ‐ I'm sorry ‐ no, of course I don't ‐ that was a really stupid thing to say.'**

**'It's OK,' he said quickly, 'don't worry.'**

**'I'm surprised so many people could see them,' said Ron. 'Three in a class ‐'**

**'Yeah, Weasley, we were just wondering,' said a malicious voice. Unheard by any of them in the muffling snow, Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle were walking along right behind them. 'D'you reckon if you saw someone snuff it you'd be able to see the Quaffle better?'**

"Shut it," muttered Sirius, adding to the Slytherin list. "Maybe if you saw someone die, it might help you see the Snitch better."

**He, Crabbe and Goyle roared with laughter as they pushed past on their way to the castle, then broke into a chorus of 'Weasley is our King'. Ron's ears turned scarlet.**

**'Ignore them, just ignore them,' intoned Hermione, pulling out her wand and performing the charm to produce hot air again, so that she could melt them an easier path through the untouched snow between them and the greenhouses.**

**December arrived, bringing with it more snow and a positive avalanche of homework for the fifth-years. Ron and Hermione's prefect duties also became more and more onerous as Christmas approached. They were called upon to supervise the decoration of the castle ('You try putting up tinsel when Peeves has got the other end and is trying to strangle you with it,' said Ron), to watch over first- and second-years spending their break-times inside because of the bitter cold ('And they're cheeky little snot-rags, you know, we definitely weren't that rude when we were in first year,' said Ron) and to patrol the corridors in shifts with Argus Filch, who suspected that the holiday spirit might show itself in an outbreak of wizard duels ('He's got dung for brains, that one,' said Ron furiously). **

"It's obvious that Ron isn't liking all this," remarked Peter.

"Well, it isn't so fun for me, either, Peter," said Remus.

**They were so busy that Hermione had even stopped knitting elf hats and was fretting that she was down to her last three.**

**'All those poor elves I haven't set free yet, having to stay here over Christmas because there aren't enough hats!'**

**Harry, who had not had the heart to tell her that Dobby was taking everything she made, bent lower over his History of Magic essay. In any case, he did not want to think about Christmas. For the first time in his school career, he very much wanted to spend the holidays away from Hogwarts. **

"Oh dear, Harry is having a horrible year if he doesn't want to be at Hogwarts for Christmas," commented Lily sadly.

**Between his Quidditch ban and worry about whether or not Hagrid was going to be put on probation, he felt highly resentful towards the place at the moment. The only thing he really looked forward to were the DA meetings, and they would have to stop over the holidays, as nearly everybody in the DA would be spending the time with their families. Hermione was going skiing with her parents, something that greatly amused Ron, who had never heard of Muggles strapping narrow strips of wood on to their feet to slide down mountains. Ron was going home to The Burrow. Harry endured several days of envy before Ron said, in response to Harry asking him how he was going to get home for Christmas: 'But you're coming too! Didn't I say? Mum wrote and told me to invite you weeks ago!'**

"Well, that's good," said James, grinning. "Harry gets to spend Christmas with the Weasleys."

**Hermione rolled her eyes, but Harry's spirits soared: the thought of Christmas at The Burrow was truly wonderful, though slightly marred by Harry's guilty feeling that he would not be able to spend the holiday with Sirius. He wondered whether he could possibly persuade Mrs. Weasley to invite his godfather for the festivities. Even though he doubted whether Dumbledore would permit Sirius to leave Grimmauld Place anyway, he could not help but think Mrs. Weasley might not want him; they were so often at loggerheads. Sirius had not contacted Harry at all since his last appearance in the fire, and although Harry knew that with Umbridge on constant watch it would be unwise to attempt to contact him, he did not like to think of Sirius alone in his mother's old house, perhaps pulling a lonely cracker with Kreacher.**

"I very much doubt that Kreacher would want to pull a cracker with me," said Sirius.

**Harry arrived early in the Room of Requirement for the last DA meeting before the holidays and was very glad he had, because when the torches burst into flame he saw that Dobby had taken it upon himself to decorate the place for Christmas. He could tell the elf had done it, because nobody else would have strung a hundred golden baubles from the ceiling, each showing a picture of Harry's face and bearing the legend: 'HAVE A VERY HARRY CHRISTMAS!'**

The Marauders laughed, while Lily looked torn between laughter and thinking that it was cute. Finally she said, "Well, it was awfully nice of Dobby to do something like this," before indulging in some laughter herself.

**Harry had only just managed to get the last of them down before the door creaked open and Luna Lovegood entered, looking as dreamy as usual.**

**'Hello,' she said vaguely, looking around at what remained of the decorations. 'These are nice, did you put them up?'**

**'No,' said Harry, 'it was Dobby the house‐elf.'**

**'Mistletoe,' said Luna dreamily, pointing at a large clump of white berries placed almost over Harry's head. **

They chuckled and James said, "I wonder how Harry is going to deal about having mistletoe over him."

**He jumped out from under it. 'Good thinking,' said Luna very seriously. 'It's often infested with Nargles.'**

"What are Nargles?" asked Peter.

"Apparently some creature that likes to infest mistletoe," replied Remus. "Though it likely exists only in Luna's imagination."

**Harry was saved the necessity of asking what Nargles are by the arrival of Angelina, Katie and Alicia. All three of them were breathless and looked very cold.**

**'Well,' said Angelina dully, pulling off her cloak and throwing it into a corner, 'we've finally replaced you.'**

**'Replaced me?' said Harry blankly.**

**'You and Fred and George,' she said impatiently. 'We've got another Seeker!'**

**'Who?' said Harry quickly.**

"Ginny?!" exclaimed James. "That's a surprise. I suppose she must be a decent player, though. And since she comes from a family of good Quidditch players, she has to have talent."

**'Ginny Weasley,' said Katie.**

**Harry gaped at her.**

**'Yeah, I know,' said Angelina, pulling out her wand and flexing her arm, 'but she's pretty good, actually. Nothing on you, of course,' she said, throwing him a very dirty look, 'but as we can't have you...'**

**Harry bit back the retort he was longing to utter: did she imagine for a second that he did not regret his expulsion from the team a hundred times more than she did?**

**'And what about the Beaters?' he asked, trying to keep his voice even.**

**'Andrew Kirke,' said Alicia without enthusiasm, 'and Jack Sloper. Neither of them are brilliant, but compared to the rest of the idiots who turned up...'**

"The people that tried out for Beater must have been rubbish," commented Sirius dismally.

**The arrival of Ron, Hermione and Neville brought this depressing discussion to an end, and within five minutes the room was full enough to prevent Harry seeing Angelina's burning, reproachful looks.**

**'OK,' he said, calling them all to order. 'I thought this evening we should just go over the things we've done so far, because it's the last meeting before the holidays and there's no point starting anything new right before a three‐week break ‐'**

**'We're not doing anything new?' said Zacharias Smith, in a disgruntled whisper loud enough to carry through the room. 'If I'd known that, I wouldn't have come.'**

**'We're all really sorry Harry didn't tell you, then,' said Fred loudly.**

The Marauders and Lily all chuckled at this.

**Several people sniggered. Harry saw Cho laughing and felt the familiar swooping sensation in his stomach, as though he had missed a step going downstairs.**

**'‐ we can practise in pairs,' said Harry. We'll start with the Impediment Jinx, for ten minutes, then we can get out the cushions and try Stunning again.'**

**They all divided up obediently; Harry partnered Neville as usual. The room was soon full of intermittent cries of 'Impedimenta!' People froze for a minute or so, during which their partner would stare aimlessly around the room watching other pairs at work, then would unfreeze and take their turn at the jinx.**

**Neville had improved beyond all recognition. **

"That's great of Neville," remarked Lily. "He's improving in Defence and maybe he'll start improving in other areas, too."

**After a while, when Harry had unfrozen three times in a row, he had Neville join Ron and Hermione again so that he could walk around the room and watch the others. When he passed Cho she beamed at him; he resisted the temptation to walk past her several more times.**

**After ten minutes on the Impediment Jinx, they laid out cushions all over the floor and started practising Stunning again. Space was really too confined to allow them all to work this spell at once; half the group observed the others for a while, then swapped over.**

**Harry felt himself positively swelling with pride as he watched them all. True, Neville did Stun Padma Patil rather than Dean, at whom he had been aiming, but it was a much closer miss than usual, and everybody else had made enormous progress.**

"That's great," commented Peter. "Everybody's doing well, and Harry's a wonderful teacher."

**At the end of an hour, Harry called a halt.**

**'You're getting really good,' he said, beaming around at them. 'When we get back from the holidays we can start doing some of the big stuff ‐ maybe even Patronuses.'**

**There was a murmur of excitement. The room began to clear in the usual twos and threes; most people wished Harry a ****'Happy Christmas' as they went. Feeling cheerful, he collected up the cushions with Ron and Hermione and stacked them neatly away. Ron and Hermione left before he did; he hung back a little, because Cho was still there and he was hoping to receive a 'Merry Christmas' from her.**

**'No, you go on,' he heard her say to her friend Marietta and his heart gave a jolt that seemed to take it into the region of his Adam's apple.**

**He pretended to be straightening the cushion pile. He was quite sure they were alone now and waited tor her to speak. Instead, he heard a hearty sniff.**

"Cho's crying?" asked Remus. "What would she have to cry about?"

**He turned and saw Cho standing in the middle of the room, tears pouring down her face.  
'Wha—?'**

**He didn't know what to do. She was simply standing there, crying silently.**

**'What's up?' he said, feebly.  
She shook her head and wiped her eyes on her sleeve.**

**'I'm ‐ sorry,' she said thickly. 'I suppose... it's just... learning all this stuff... it just makes me... wonder whether... if he'd known it all… he'd still be alive.'**

"Oh, she's thinking about Cedric," said Lily. "Harry won't like that, though."

**Harry's heart sank right back past its usual spot and settled somewhere around his navel. He ought to have known. She wanted to talk about Cedric.**

**'He did know this stuff,' Harry said heavily. 'He was really good at it, or he could never have got to the middle of that maze. But if Voldemort really wants to kill you, you don't stand a chance.'**

**She hiccoughed at the sound of Voldemort's name, but stared at Harry without flinching.  
'You survived when you were just a baby,' she said quietly.**

"That's different," said James heavily. "And Harry's not completely sure why it happened, either."

**'Yeah, well,' said Harry wearily, moving towards the door, 'I dunno why nor does anyone else, so it's nothing to be proud of.'**

**'Oh, don't go!' said Cho, sounding tearful again. 'I'm really sorry to get all upset like this... I didn't mean to...'**

**She hiccoughed again. She was very pretty even when her eyes were red and puffy. Harry felt thoroughly miserable. He'd have been so pleased with just a 'Merry Christmas'.**

**'I know it must be horrible for you,' she said, mopping her eyes on her sleeve again. 'Me mentioning Cedric, when you saw him die... I suppose you just want to forget about it?'**

**Harry did not say anything to this; it was quite true, but he felt heartless saying it.**

**'You're a r‐really good teacher, you know,' said Cho, with a watery smile. 'I've never been able to Stun anything before.'**

**'Thanks,' said Harry awkwardly.**

**They looked at each other for a long moment. Harry felt a burning desire to run from the room and, at the same time, a complete inability to move his feet.**

**'Mistletoe,' said Cho quietly, pointing at the ceiling over his head.**

**'Yeah,' said Harry. His mouth was very dry. 'It's probably full of Nargles, though.'**

Sirius stifled a laugh and Peter asked, "Why is Harry talking about some creature Luna believes in?"

**'What are Nargles?'**

**'No idea,' said Harry. She had moved closer. His brain seemed to have been Stunned. 'You'd have to ask Loony. Luna, I mean.'**

**Cho made a funny noise halfway between a sob and a laugh. She was even nearer to him now. He could have counted the freckles on her nose.**

**'I really like you, Harry.'**

**He could not think. A tingling sensation was spreading through him, paralysing his arms, legs and brain.  
She was much too close. He could see every tear clinging to her eyelashes...**

**He returned to the common room half an hour later to find Hermione and Ron in the best seats by the fire; **

"Darn!" exclaimed Sirius, pouting. "We don't get to see them kiss."

"How do we even know they kissed when it doesn't say so, Sirius?" asked Remus.

"Well, what else could have happened?" retorted Sirius.

There was a flash of light and suddenly a television and DVD player appeared, along with a note. Lily read, "I'll be nice and allow you to see the scene in the movie of the fifth book. The Muggle things will disappear once you're done watching the scene." The television turned on magically and the DVD player automatically took it to the correct scene.

The Marauders and Lily watched as Daniel Radcliffe and Katie Leung stood in front of a mirror. Cho asked about Cedric, which Harry replied to. Then Cho pointed out the mistletoe, and Harry said that it must be full of Nargles. When she asked what they were, he replied, "No idea." Then the two kissed, and as they did so, the mistletoe grew larger. Then the scene shifted to Harry talking to Ron and Hermione in the Gryffindor common room and the television and DVD player disappeared.

Another note appeared, telling the Marauders and Lily who the actors and actresses playing the trio and Cho were. After James had read the note, they five of them commented on the scene they saw. Lily thought it very sweet, while Peter commented on how the mistletoe grew as Cho and Harry kissed. Finally James resumed reading.

**nearly everybody else had gone to bed. Hermione was writing a very long letter; she had already filled half a roll of parchment, which was dangling from the edge of the table. Ron was lying on the hearthrug, trying to finish his Transfiguration homework.**

**'What kept you?' he asked, as Harry sank into the armchair next to Hermione's.**

**Harry didn't answer. He was in a state of shock. Half of him wanted to tell Ron and Hermione what had just happened, but the other half wanted to take the secret with him to the grave.**

"Well, if we didn't see the scene from the movie, that would definitely prove that Cho and Harry kissed," said Remus.

**'Are you all right, Harry?' Hermione asked, peering at him over the tip of her quill.**

**Harry gave a half-hearted shrug. In truth, he didn't know whether he was all right or not. 'What's up?' said Ron, hoisting himself up on his elbow to get a clearer view of Harry. 'What's happened?'**

**Harry didn't quite know how to set about telling them, and still wasn't sure whether he wanted to. Just as he had decided not to say anything, Hermione took matters out of his hands.**

"I don't know to be annoyed at Hermione or not," said James.

**'Is it Cho?' she asked in a businesslike way. 'Did she corner you after the meeting?'**

**Numbly surprised, Harry nodded. Ron sniggered, breaking off when Hermione caught his eye.**

**'So ‐ er ‐ what did she want?' he asked in a mock casual voice.**

**'She ‐' Harry began, rather hoarsely; he cleared his throat and tried again. 'She ‐ er ‐'**

**'Did you kiss?' asked Hermione briskly.**

**Ron sat up so fast he sent his ink bottle flying all over the rug. Disregarding this completely, he stared avidly at Harry.  
'Well?' he demanded.**

**Harry looked from Ron's expression of mingled curiosity and hilarity to Hermione's slight frown, and nodded.**

"That clinches it," said Peter.

**'HA!'  
Ron made a triumphant gesture with his fist and went into a raucous peal of laughter that made several timid-looking second-years over beside the window jump. A reluctant grin spread over Harry's face as he watched Ron rolling around on the hearthrug.**

**Hermione gave Ron a look of deep disgust and returned to her letter.**

**'Well?' Ron said finally, looking up at Harry. 'How was it?'**

**Harry considered for a moment. 'Wet,' he said truthfully.**

Remus raised a brow. "Wet? That doesn't sound good."

"Well, Cho was crying," pointed out Lily. "That might be why it was wet."

**Ron made a noise that might have indicated jubilation or disgust, it was hard to tell.**

**'Because she was crying,' Harry continued heavily.**

**'Oh,' said Ron, his smile fading slightly. 'Are you that bad at kissing?'**

"My son can't be bad at kissing!" exclaimed James indignantly. "I'm not!" To prove it, he leaned over and kissed Lily, who blushed when the kiss broke off.

**'Dunno,' said Harry, who hadn't considered this, and immediately felt rather worried. 'Maybe I am.'**

**'Of course you're not,' said Hermione absently, still scribbling away at her letter.**

"And how would Hermione know?" asked Peter. "It's not like she ever kissed Harry."

**'How do you know?' said Ron very sharply.**

**'Because Cho spends half her time crying these days,' said Hermione vaguely. 'She does it at mealtimes, in the loos, all over the place.'**

**'You'd think a bit of kissing would cheer her up,' said Ron, grinning.**

**'Ron,' said Hermione in a dignified voice, dipping the point of her quill into her inkpot, 'you are the most insensitive wart I have ever had the misfortune to meet.'**

**'What's that supposed to mean?' said Ron indignantly. 'What sort of person cries while someone's kissing them?'**

"Well, Cho was talking about Cedric and feeling sad about him before she kissed Harry," said Sirius.

**'Yeah,' said Harry, slightly desperately, 'who does?'**

**Hermione looked at the pair of them with an almost pitying expression on her face.  
'Don't you understand how Cho's feeling at the moment?' she asked.**

**'No,' said Harry and Ron together.**

**Hermione sighed and laid down her quill.**

**'Well, obviously, she's feeling very sad, because of Cedric dying. Then I expect she's feeling confused because she liked Cedric and now she likes Harry, and she can't work out who she likes best. Then she'll be feeling guilty, thinking it's an insult to Cedric's memory to be kissing Harry at all, and she'll be worrying about what everyone else might say about her if she starts going out with Harry. And she probably can't work out what her feelings towards Harry are, anyway, because he was the one who was with Cedric when Cedric died, so that's all very mixed up and painful. Oh, and she's afraid she's going to be thrown off the Ravenclaw Quidditch team because she's been flying so badly.'**

"Cho's feeling all _that_?" asked Peter incredulously. "No wonder she's crying."

**A slightly stunned silence greeted the end of this speech, then Ron said, 'One person can't feel all that at once, they'd explode.'**

"Not everyone has the emotional range of a spoon like you, Ron," said Lily, shaking her head.

**'Just because you've got the emotional range of a teaspoon doesn't mean we all have,' said Hermione nastily picking up her quill again.**

"Hermione agrees with you there, Lily," commented Sirius.

**'She was the one who started it,' said Harry. 'I wouldn't've ‐ she just sort of came at me ‐ and next thing she's crying all over me ‐ I didn't know what to do —'**

**'Don't blame you, mate,' said Ron, looking alarmed at the very thought.**

**'You just had to be nice to her,' said Hermione, looking up anxiously. 'You were, weren't you?'**

**'Well,' said Harry, an unpleasant heat creeping up his face, 'I sort of ‐ patted her on the back a bit.'**

"Well, it could have been worse," said Lily. "I wish I could be there to give my son adivce about girls."

**Hermione looked as though she was restraining herself from rolling her eyes with extreme difficulty.**

**'Well, I suppose it could have been worse,' she said. 'Are you going to see her again?'**

**'I'll have to, won't I?' said Harry. 'We've got DA meetings, haven't we?'**

"Is Harry thick, or is he purposedly acting like he misunderstands Hermione's meaning?" asked Remus.

**'You know what I mean,' said Hermione impatiently.**

**Harry said nothing. Hermione's words opened up a whole new vista of frightening possibilities. He tried to imagine going somewhere with Cho — Hogsmeade, perhaps ‐ and being alone with her for hours at a time. Of course, she would have been expecting him to ask her out after what had just happened... the thought made his stomach clench painfully.**

"Poor Harry," said Sirius, shaking his head. "He obviously doesn't have a way with the ladies like I do."

**'Oh well,' said Hermione distantly, buried in her letter once more, 'you'll have plenty of opportunities to ask her.'**

**'What if he doesn't want to ask her?' said Ron, who had been watching Harry with an unusually shrewd expression on his face.**

"Well, Harry has some difficulty with bringing himself to ask Cho out now," said Remus. "But he fancies her and will probably work up the courage to ask her out eventually."

**'Don't be silly,' said Hermione vaguely, 'Harry's liked her for ages, haven't you, Harry?'**

**He did not answer. Yes, he had liked Cho for ages, but whenever he had imagined a scene involving the two of them it had always featured a Cho who was enjoying herself, as opposed to a Cho who was sobbing uncontrollably into his shoulder.**

**'Who're you writing the novel to, anyway?' Ron asked Hermione, trying to read the bit of parchment now trailing on the floor. Hermione hitched it up out of sight.**

**'Viktor.'**

**'Krum?'**

**'How many other Viktors do we know?'**

**Ron said nothing, but looked disgruntled. They sat in silence for another twenty minutes, Ron finishing his Transfiguration essay with many snorts of impatience and crossings-out, Hermione writing steadily to the very end of the parchment, rolling it up carefully and sealing it, and Harry staring into the fire, wishing more than anything that Sirius's head would appear there and give him some advice about girls. But the fire merely crackled lower and lower, until the red-hot  
embers crumbled into ash and, looking around, Harry saw that they were, yet again, the last ones in the common room.**

**'Well, night,' said Hermione, yawning widely as she set off up the girls' staircase.**

**'What does she see in Krum?' Ron demanded, as he and Harry climbed the boys' stairs.**

"And Ron's showing his jealousy again," sighed Lily. "You don't need to worry, Ron. Hermione only sees Viktor Krum as a friend and I'm sure the two of you will end up together someday."

**'Well,' said Harry, considering the matter, 'I s'pose he's older, isn't he... and he's an international Quidditch player...'**

**'Yeah, but apart from that,' said Ron, sounding aggravated. 'I mean, he's a grouchy git, isn't he?'**

**'Bit grouchy, yeah,' said Harry, whose thoughts were still on Cho.**

**They pulled off their robes and put on pyjamas in silence; Dean, Seamus and Neville were already asleep. Harry put his glasses on his bedside table and got into bed but did not pull the hangings closed around his four-poster; instead, he stared at the patch of starry sky visible through the window next to Neville's bed. If he had known, this time last night, that in twenty-four hours' time he would have kissed Cho Chang...**

"Well, we weren't expecting that either," said Peter.

**'Night,' grunted Ron, from somewhere to his right.**

**'Night,' said Harry.**

**Maybe next time... if there was a next time... she'd be a bit happier. He ought to have asked her out; she had probably been expecting it and was now really angry with him... or was she lying in bed, still crying about Cedric? He did not know what to think. Hermione's explanation had made it all seem more complicated rather than easier to understand.**

**That's what they should teach us here, he thought, turning over on to his side, how girls' brains work... it'd be more useful than Divination, anyway...**

"Yeah, it would be," said Peter wistfully. "I could use a class like that."

**Neville snuffled in his sleep. An owl hooted somewhere out in the night.**

**Harry dreamed he was back in the DA room. Cho was accusing him of luring her there under false pretences; she said he had promised her a hundred and fifty Chocolate Frog Cards if she showed up. Harry protested... Cho shouted, 'Cedric gave me loads of Chocolate Frog Cards, look!' And she pulled out fistfuls of Cards from inside her robes and threw them into the air. Then she turned into Hermione, who said, 'You did promise her, you know, Harry... I think you'd better give her something else instead... how about your Firebolt?' And Harry was protesting that he could not give Cho his Firebolt, because Umbridge had it, and anyway the whole thing was ridiculous, he'd only come to the DA room to put up some Christmas baubles shaped like Dobby's head...**

"Okay, that dream didn't make much sense," said Sirius.

**The dream changed...**

**His body felt smooth, powerful and flexible. He was gliding between shining metal bars, across dark, cold stone... he was flat against the floor, sliding along on his belly... it was dark, yet he could see objects around him shimmering in strange, vibrant colours... he was turning his head... at first glance the corridor was empty... but no... a man was sitting on the floor ahead, his chin drooping on to his chest, his outline gleaming in the dark...**

**Harry put out his tongue... he tasted the man's scent on the air... he was alive but drowsy... sitting in front of a door at the end of the corridor...**

**Harry longed to bite the man... but he must master the impulse... he had more important work to do...**

**But the man was stirring... a silver Cloak fell from his legs as he jumped to his feet; and Harry saw his vibrant, blurred outline towering above him, saw a wand withdrawn from a belt... he had no choice... he reared high from the floor and struck once, twice, three times, plunging his fangs deeply into the man's flesh, feeling his ribs splinter beneath his jaws, feeling the warm gush of blood...**

"Oh no!" gasped Lily, clutching James's arm. "This is not good."

**The man was yelling in pain... then he fell silent... he slumped backwards against the wall... blood was splattering on to the floor...**

**His forehead hurt terribly… it was aching fit to burst...**

"This dream must involve Voldemort somehow," said Remus. "Or that snake of his."

**'Harry! HARRY!'**

**He opened his eyes. Every inch of his body was covered in icy sweat; his bed covers were twisted all around him like a strait-jacket; he felt as though a white-hot poker were being applied to his forehead.**

**'Harry!'**

**Ron was standing over him looking extremely frightened. There were more figures at the foot of Harry's bed. He clutched his head in his hands; the pain was blinding him... he rolled right over and vomited over the edge of the mattress.**

**'He's really ill,' said a scared voice. 'Should we call someone?'**

**'Harry! Harry!'**

**He had to tell Ron, it was very important that he tell him... taking great gulps of air, Harry pushed himself up in bed, willing himself not to throw up again, the pain half-blinding him.**

**'Your dad,' he panted, his chest heaving. 'Your dad's... been attacked...'**

"_What_?!" they all exclaimed, exchanging looks. They were all wondering if Harry was somehow seeing a real event in his dream.

**'What?' said Ron uncomprehendingly.**

**'Your dad! He's been bitten, it's serious, there was blood everywhere...'**

**'I'm going for help,' said the same scared voice, and Harry heard footsteps running out of the dormitory.**

**'Harry, mate,' said Ron uncertainly, 'you... you were just dreaming...'**

**'No!' said Harry furiously; it was crucial that Ron understand. ****'It wasn't a dream... not an ordinary dream... I was there, I saw it... I did it...'**

"Okay, then somehow Harry was somehow in the snake's mind and saw everything," said Peter.

**He could hear Seamus and Dean muttering but did not care. The pain in his forehead was subsiding slightly, though he was still sweating and shivering feverishly. He retched again and Ron leapt backwards out of the way.**

**'Harry, you're not well,' he said shakily. 'Neville's gone for help.'**

**'I'm fine!' Harry choked, wiping his mouth on his pyjamas and shaking uncontrollably. 'There's nothing wrong with me, it's your dad you've got to worry about ‐ we need to find out where he is ‐ he's bleeding like mad ‐ I was ‐ it was a huge snake.'**

**He tried to get out of bed but Ron pushed him back into it; Dean and Seamus were still whispering somewhere nearby. Whether one minute passed or ten, Harry did not know; he simply sat there shaking, feeling the pain recede very slowly from his scar... then there were hurried footsteps coming up the stairs and he heard Neville's voice again.**

**'Over here, Professor.'**

**Professor McGonagall came hurrying into the dormitory in her tartan dressing gown, her glasses perched lopsidedly on the bridge of her bony nose.**

**'What is it, Potter? Where does it hurt?'**

**He had never been so pleased to see her; it was a member of the Order of the Phoenix he needed now, not someone fussing over him and prescribing useless potions.**

"Thank Merlin," said James. "McGonagall can help."

**'It's Ron's dad,' he said, sitting up again. 'He's been attacked by a snake and it's serious, I saw it happen.'**

**'What do you mean, you saw it happen?' said Professor McGonagall, her dark eyebrows contracting.**

**'I don't know... I was asleep and then I was there...'**

**'You mean you dreamed this?'**

**'No!' said Harry angrily; would none of them understand? 'I was having a dream at first about something completely different, something stupid... and then this interrupted it. It was real, I didn't imagine it. Mr. Weasley was asleep on the floor and he was attacked by a gigantic snake, there was a load of blood, he collapsed, someone's got to find out where he is...'**

They all shuddered. "Let's hope McGonagall believes Harry," said Remus.

**Professor McGonagall was gazing at him through her lopsided spectacles as though horrified at what she was seeing.**

**'I'm not lying and I'm not mad!' Harry told her, his voice rising to a shout. 'I tell you, I saw it happen!'**

**'I believe you, Potter,' said Professor McGonagall curtly. 'Put on your dressing gown ‐ we're going to see the Headmaster.'**

"Good," said Sirius. "Dumbledore can sort things out and get Arthur help."

Lily volunteered to read next and took the book from James.


	22. St Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladys

Author's Note: I am really, really sorry about the long time it took to update this. I lost interest in this for awhile, because I was running out of original stuff for the Marauders and Lily to say, and so never got around to updating earlier. Then I remembered all of my fans, who read and liked the series. Also, there were several reviews asking when I was going to update. As I can't disappoint my readers, I won't give up on this fic, though I can't exactly update frequently. I have other things to do besides write fanfiction, and I am collaborating with my sister on other fics. However, I promise to complete all seven books.

This chapter is dedicated to Cosmic-Writer, ChristinaAngel, ElleGrey, LunaSky, and Lady Potter of Tortall.

**— CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO —  
St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries**

**Harry was so relieved she was taking him seriously that he did not hesitate, but jumped out of bed at once, pulled on his dressing gown and pushed his glasses back on to his nose.**

"Thank Merlin for McGonagall," remarked James. "Everything will be taken care of once Dumbledore is told."

**'Weasley, you ought to come too,' said Professor McGonagall.**

**They followed Professor McGonagall past the silent figures of Neville, Dean and Seamus, out of the dormitory, down the spiral stairs into the common room, through the portrait hole and off along the Fat Lady's moonlit corridor. Harry felt as though the panic inside him might spill over at any moment; he wanted to run, to yell for Dumbledore; Mr. Weasley was bleeding as they walked along so sedately, and what if those fangs (Harry tried hard not to think 'my fangs') had been poisonous? **

"Considering the snake is likely Voldemort's, the fangs probably were poisonous," said Sirius.

**They passed Mrs. Norris, who turned her lamplike eyes upon them and hissed faintly, but Professor McGonagall said, 'Shoo!' Mrs. Norris slunk away into the shadows, and in a few minutes they had reached the stone gargoyle guarding the entrance to Dumbledore's office.**

**'Fizzing Whizzbee,' said Professor McGonagall.**

**The gargoyle sprang to life and leapt aside; the wall behind it split in two to reveal a stone staircase that was moving continually upwards like a spiral escalator. The three of them stepped on to the moving stairs; the wall closed behind them with a thud and they were moving upwards in tight circles until they reached the highly polished oak door with the brass knocker shaped like a griffin.**

**Though it was now well past midnight there were voices coming from inside the room, a positive babble of them. It sounded as though Dumbledore was entertaining at least a dozen people.**

"He's talking to the portraits, I bet," said Remus.

**Professor McGonagall rapped three times with the griffin knocker and the voices ceased abruptly as though someone had switched them all off. The door opened of its own accord and Professor McGonagall led Harry and Ron inside.**

**The room was in half-darkness; the strange silver instruments standing on tables were silent and still rather than whirring and emitting puffs of smoke as they usually did; the portraits of old headmasters and headmistresses covering the walls were all snoozing in their frames. **

"They're just pretending to be asleep," said Peter. "We noticed when we were in Dumbledore's office before."

**Behind the door, a magnificent red and gold bird the size of a swan dozed on its perch with its head under its wing.**

**'Oh, it's you, Professor McGonagall... and... ah.'**

**Dumbledore was sitting in a high-backed chair behind his desk; he leaned forward into the pool of candlelight illuminating the papers laid out before him. He was wearing a magnificently embroidered purple and gold dressing gown over a snowy white nightshirt, but seemed wide-awake, his penetrating light blue eyes fixed intently upon Professor McGonagall.**

"Dumbledore's favorite color must be purple," said Lily.

**'Professor Dumbledore, Potter has had a... well, a nightmare,' said Professor McGonagall. 'He says...'**

**'It wasn't a nightmare,' said Harry quickly.**

**Professor McGonagall looked round at Harry, frowning slightly. 'Very well, then, Potter, you tell the Headmaster about it.'**

**'I... well, I was asleep...' said Harry and, even in his terror and his desperation to make Dumbledore understand, he felt slightly irritated that the Headmaster was not looking at him, but examining his own interlocked fingers. 'But it wasn't an ordinary dream... it was real... I saw it happen...' He took a deep breath, 'Ron's dad - Mr. Weasley - has been attacked by a giant snake.'**

**The words seemed to reverberate in the air after he had said them, sounding slightly ridiculous, even comic. There was a pause in which Dumbledore leaned back and stared meditatively at the ceiling. Ron looked from Harry to Dumbledore, white-faced and shocked.**

**'How did you see this?' Dumbledore asked quietly, still not looking at Harry.**

**'Well... I don't know,' said Harry, rather angrily - what did it matter? 'Inside my head, I suppose -'**

**'You misunderstand me,' said Dumbledore, still in the same calm tone. 'I mean... can you remember — er - where you were positioned as you watched this attack happen? Were you perhaps standing beside the victim, or else looking down on the scene from above?'**

"What kind of question is that?" demanded James. "You don't think Dumbledore has an idea as to what kind of dream it was?"

**This was such a curious question that Harry gaped at Dumbledore; it was almost as though he knew...  
'I was the snake,' he said. 'I saw it all from the snake's point of view.'**

**Nobody else spoke for a moment, then Dumbledore, now looking at Ron who was still whey-faced, asked in a new and sharper voice, 'Is Arthur seriously injured?'**

**'Yes,' said Harry emphatically - why were they all so slow on the uptake, did they not realise how much a person bled when fangs that long pierced their side? And why could Dumbledore not do him the courtesy of looking at him?**

**But Dumbledore stood up, so quickly it made Harry jump, and addressed one of the old portraits hanging very near the ceiling. 'Everard?' he said sharply. 'And you too, Dilys!'**

"Good, Dumbledore is taking action," said Sirius.

"What do those two portraits have to do with things?" asked Lily.

"There's a portrait of Everard in the Ministry," explained Remus. "And Dilys was a Healer before becoming headmistress, so there's a portrait of her in St. Mungo's. So those two can go back and forth between their portraits."

**A sallow-faced wizard with a short black fringe and an elderly witch with long silver ringlets in the frame beside him, both of whom seemed to have been in the deepest of sleeps, opened their eyes immediately.**

**'You were listening?' said Dumbledore.**

**The wizard nodded; the witch said, 'Naturally.'**

**'The man has red hair and glasses,' said Dumbledore. 'Everard, you will need to raise the alarm, make sure he is found by the right people ‐'**

"Good, Arthur will be taken care of," said Peter.

**Both nodded and moved sideways out of their frames, but instead of emerging in neighbouring pictures (as usually happened at Hogwarts) neither reappeared. One frame now contained nothing but a backdrop of dark curtain, the other a handsome leather armchair. Harry noticed that many of the other headmasters and mistresses on the walls, though snoring and drooling most convincingly, kept sneaking peeks at him from under their eyelids, and he suddenly understood who had been talking when they had knocked.**

**'Everard and Dilys were two of Hogwarts's most celebrated Heads,' Dumbledore said, now sweeping around Harry, Ron and Professor McGonagall to approach the magnificent sleeping bird on his perch beside the door. 'Their renown is such that both have portraits hanging in other important wizarding institutions. As they are free to move between their own portraits, they can tell us what may be happening elsewhere...'**

**'But Mr. Weasley could be anywhere!' said Harry.**

**'Please sit down, all three of you,' said Dumbledore, as though Harry had not spoken, 'Everard and Dilys may not be back for several minutes. Professor McGonagall, if you could draw up extra chairs.'**

**Professor McGonagall pulled her wand from the pocket of her dressing gown and waved it; three chairs appeared out of thin air, straight-backed and wooden, quite unlike the comfortable chintz armchairs that Dumbledore had conjured up at Harry's hearing. Harry sat down, watching Dumbledore over his shoulder. Dumbledore was now stroking Fawkes's plumed golden head with one finger. The phoenix awoke immediately. He stretched his beautiful head high and observed Dumbledore through bright, dark eyes.**

**'We will need,' Dumbledore said very quietly to the bird, 'a warning.'**

"Why do they need a warning?" wondered Sirius.

"Probably because Umb!tch would try to interfere if she knew what was going on," answered Lily.

**There was a flash of fire and the phoenix had gone.**

**Dumbledore now swooped down upon one of the fragile silver instruments whose function Harry had never known, carried it over to his desk, sat down facing them again and tapped it gently with the tip of his wand.**

**The instrument tinkled into life at once with rhythmic clinking noises. Tiny puffs of pale green smoke issued from the minuscule silver tube at the top. Dumbledore watched the smoke closely, his brow furrowed. After a few seconds, the tiny puffs became a steady stream of smoke that thickened and coiled in the air... a serpent's head grew out of the end of it, opening its mouth wide. Harry wondered whether the instrument was confirming his story: he looked eagerly at Dumbledore for a sign that he was right, but Dumbledore did not look up.**

"I wonder what Dumbledore's doing," mused Remus. "And what is that instrument?"

"I don't think we'll find out, though," said Peter.

**'Naturally, naturally,' murmured Dumbledore apparently to himself, still observing the stream of smoke without the slightest sign of surprise. 'But in essence divided?'**

**Harry could make neither head nor tail of this question. The smoke serpent, however, split itself instantly into two snakes, both coiling and undulating in the dark air. With a look of grim satisfaction, Dumbledore gave the instrument another gentle tap with his wand: the clinking noise slowed and died and the smoke serpents grew faint, became a formless haze and vanished.**

**Dumbledore replaced the instrument on its spindly little table. Harry saw many of the old headmasters in the portraits follow him with their eyes, then, realising that Harry was watching them, hastily pretend to be sleeping again. Harry wanted to ask what the strange silver instrument was for, but before he could do so, there was a shout from the top of the wall to their right; the wizard called Everard had reappeared in his portrait, panting slightly.**

**'Dumbledore!'**

**'What news?' said Dumbledore at once.**

**'I yelled until someone came running,' said the wizard, who was mopping his brow on the curtain behind him, 'said I'd heard something moving downstairs - they weren't sure whether to believe me but went down to check - you know there are no portraits down there to watch from. Anyway, they carried him up a few minutes later. He doesn't look good, he's covered in blood, I ran along to Elfrida Cragg's portrait to get a good view as they left -'**

"Oh no," said James. "I really hope Arthur recovers from this."

**'Good,' said Dumbledore as Ron made a convulsive movement. 'I take it Dilys will have seen him arrive, then -'**

**And moments later, the silver-ringleted witch had reappeared in her picture, too; she sank, coughing, into her armchair and said, 'Yes, they've taken him to St Mungo's, Dumbledore... they carried him past my portrait... he looks bad...'**

Peter wrung his hands. "Well, they got to him in time."

**'Thank you,' said Dumbledore. He looked round at Professor McGonagall. ****'Minerva, I need you to go and wake the other Weasley children.'**

**'Of course...'**

**Professor McGonagall got up and moved swiftly to the door. Harry cast a sideways glance at Ron, who was looking terrified.**

**'And Dumbledore - what about Molly?' said Professor McGonagall, pausing at the door.**

**'That will be a job for Fawkes when he has finished keeping a lookout for anybody approaching,' said Dumbledore. 'But she may already know... that excellent clock of hers...'**

**Harry knew Dumbledore was referring to the clock that told, not the time, but the whereabouts and conditions of the various Weasley family members, and with a pang he thought that Mr. Weasley's hand must, even now, be pointing at mortal peril. But it was very late. Mrs. Weasley was probably asleep, not watching the clock. Harry felt cold as he remembered Mrs. Weasley's Boggart turning into Mr. Weasley's lifeless body, his glasses askew, blood running down his face... but Mr. Weasley wasn't going to die... he couldn't...**

"He's not!" exclaimed Lily fiercely. "Harry had the dream and so enabled Arthur to be found in time!"

**Dumbledore was now rummaging in a cupboard behind Harry and Ron. He emerged from it carrying a blackened old kettle, which he placed carefully on his desk. He raised his wand and murmured, 'Portus!' For a moment the kettle trembled, glowing with an odd blue light; then it quivered to rest, as solidly black as ever.**

"Dumbledore's making a portkey!" exclaimed Remus. "But why?"

**Dumbledore marched over to another portrait, this time of a clever-looking wizard with a pointed beard, who had been painted wearing the Slytherin colours of green and silver and was apparently sleeping so deeply that he could not hear Dumbledore's voice when he attempted to rouse him. 'Phineas. Phineas.'**

Sirius made a face. "I suppose Dumbledore has a message for me that he wants my great-great grandfather to deliver?"

**The subjects of the portraits lining the room were no longer pretending to be asleep; they were shifting around in their frames, the better to watch what was happening. When the clever-looking wizard continued to feign sleep, some of them shouted his name, too.**

**'Phineas! Phineas! PHINEAS!'**

**He could not pretend any longer; he gave a theatrical jerk and opened his eyes wide.**

**'Did someone call?'**

**'I need you to visit your other portrait again, Phineas,' said Dumbledore. 'I've got another message.'**

**'Visit my other portrait?' said Phineas in a reedy voice, giving a long, fake yawn (his eyes travelling around the room and focusing on Harry). 'Oh, no, Dumbledore, I am too tired tonight.'**

"Stop lying," said James. "Besides, I though all the portraits have to serve the present Headmaster or mistress."

**Something about Phineas's voice was familiar to Harry, where had he heard it before? But before he could think, the portraits on the surrounding walls broke into a storm of protest.**

**'Insubordination, sir!' roared a corpulent, red-nosed wizard, brandishing his fists. 'Dereliction of duty!'**

**'We are honour-bound to give service to the present Headmaster of Hogwarts!' cried a frail-looking old wizard whom Harry recognised as Dumbledore's predecessor, Armando Dippet. 'Shame on you, Phineas!'**

**'Shall I persuade him, Dumbledore?' called a gimlet-eyed witch, raising an unusually thick wand that looked not unlike a birch rod.**

"Well, the other portraits know what is due to Dumbledore and is taking Phineas to task," commented Remus.

**'Oh, very well,' said the wizard called Phineas, eyeing the wand with mild apprehension, 'though he may well have destroyed my picture by now, he's done away with most of the family ‐'**

**'Sirius knows not to destroy your portrait,' said Dumbledore, and Harry realised immediately where he had heard Phineas's voice before: issuing from the apparently empty frame in his bedroom in Grimmauld Place. 'You are to give him the message that Arthur Weasley has been gravely injured and that his wife, children and Harry Potter will be arriving at his house shortly. Do you understand?'**

**'Arthur Weasley, injured, wife and children and Harry Potter coming to stay,' repeated Phineas in a bored voice. 'Yes, yes... very well.'**

**He sloped away into the frame of the portrait and disappeared from view at the very moment the study door opened again. Fred, George and Ginny were ushered inside by Professor McGonagall, all three of them looking dishevelled and shocked, still in their night things.**

**'Harry - what's going on?' asked Ginny, who looked frightened. 'Professor McGonagall says you saw Dad get hurt ‐'**

"Yes, he did," said James.

**'Your father has been injured in the course of his work for the Order of the Phoenix,' said Dumbledore, before Harry could speak. 'He has been taken to St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries. I am sending you back to Sirius's house, which is much more convenient for the hospital than The Burrow. You will meet your mother there.'**

**'How're we going?' asked Fred, looking shaken. 'Floo powder?'**

"I don't think so," said Lily. "Dumbledore made a Portkey, so that's probably how you're all going."

**'No,' said Dumbledore, 'Floo powder is not safe at the moment, the Network is being watched. You will be taking a Portkey.' He indicated the old kettle lying innocently on his desk. 'We are just waiting for Phineas Nigellus to report back... I want to be sure that the coast is clear before sending you -'**

**There was a flash of flame in the very middle of the office, leaving behind a single golden feather that floated gently to the floor.**

**'It is Fawkes's warning,' said Dumbledore, catching the feather as it fell. 'Professor Umbridge must know you're out of your beds... Minerva, go and head her off - tell her any story -'**

**Professor McGonagall was gone in a swish of tartan.**

**'He says he'll be delighted,' said a bored voice behind Dumbledore; the wizard called Phineas had reappeared in front of his Slytherin banner. 'My great-great-grandson has always had an odd taste in house-guests.'**

"Of course I'll be delighted," said Sirius. "My godson and the Weasleys are coming over to visit, so I won't be alone in the house with only Kreacher for company. Maybe my future self should start being more civil to Kreacher, even if he is a git."

**'Come here, then,' Dumbledore said to Harry and the Weasleys. 'And quickly, before anyone else joins us.'  
Harry and the others gathered around Dumbledore's desk.**

**'You have all used a Portkey before?' asked Dumbledore, and they nodded, each reaching out to touch some part of the blackened kettle. 'Good. On the count of three, then... one... two...'**

**It happened in a fraction of a second: in the infinitesimal pause before Dumbledore said 'three', Harry looked up at him - they were very close together ‐ and Dumbledore's clear blue gaze moved from the Portkey to Harry's face.**

**At once, Harry's scar burned white-hot, as though the old wound had burst open again - and unbidden, unwanted, but terrifyingly strong, there rose within Harry a hatred so powerful he felt, for that instant, he would like nothing better than to strike - to bite - to sink his fangs into the man before him —  
'... three.'**

**Harry felt a powerful jerk behind his navel, the ground vanished from beneath his feet, his hand was glued to the kettle; he was banging into the others as they all sped forwards in a swirl of colours and a rush of wind, the kettle pulling them onwards... until his feet hit the ground so hard his knees buckled, the kettle clattered to the ground, and somewhere close at hand a voice said:**

**'Back again, the blood-traitor brats. Is it true their father's dying?'**

"Or maybe not, if Kreacher's going to act like this," said Sirius.

"Sirius!" admonished Lily. "Maybe if you were nicer to him, he wouldn't be acting like this!"

**'OUT!' roared a second voice.**

**Harry scrambled to his feet and looked around; they had arrived in the gloomy basement kitchen of number twelve, Grimmauld Place. The only sources of light were the fire and one guttering candle, which illuminated the remains of a solitary supper. Kreacher was disappearing through the door to the hall, looking back at them malevolently as he hitched up his loincloth; Sirius was hurrying towards them all, looking anxious. He was unshaven and still in his day clothes; there was also a slightly Mundungus-like whiff of stale drink about him.**

**'What's going on?' he said, stretching out a hand to help Ginny up. 'Phineas Nigellus said Arthur's been badly injured —'**

**'Ask Harry,' said Fred.**

**'Yeah, I want to hear this for myself,' said George.**

**The twins and Ginny were staring at him. Kreacher's footsteps had stopped on the stairs outside.**

**'It was -' Harry began; this was even worse than telling McGonagall and Dumbledore. **

"Poor Harry," said Peter sympathetically.

**'I had a - a kind of - vision...'**

**And he told them all that he had seen, though he altered the story so that it sounded as though he had watched from the sidelines as the snake attacked, rather than from behind the snake's own eyes. Ron, who was still very white,  
gave him a fleeting look, but did not speak. When Harry had finished, Fred, George and Ginny continued to stare at him for a moment. Harry did not know whether he was imagining it or not, but he fancied there was something accusatory in their looks. Well, if they were going to blame him just for seeing the attack, he was glad he had not told them that he had been inside the snake at the time.**

"I don't think they blame him," said Remus. "They're just not reacting to what Harry said very well at the moment."

**'Is Mum here?' said Fred, turning to Sirius.**

**'She probably doesn't even know what's happened yet,' said Sirius. 'The important thing was to get you away before Umbridge could interfere. I expect Dumbledore's letting Molly know now.'**

**'We've got to go to St. Mungo's,' said Ginny urgently. She looked around at her brothers; they were of course still in their pyjamas. 'Sirius, can you lend us cloaks or anything?'**

"But you can't just go rushing off to St. Mungo's now!" exclaimed Lily, alarmed. "How will it look when you arrive to see your father when your mother hasn't even been notified by the hospital yet!"

**'Hang on, you can't go tearing off to St. Mungo's!' said Sirius.**

**'Course we can go to St. Mungo's if we want,' said Fred, with a mulish expression. 'He's our dad!'**

**'And how are you going to explain how you knew Arthur was attacked before the hospital even let his wife know?'**

**'What does that matter?' said George hotly.**

**'It matters because we don't want to draw attention to the fact that Harry is having visions of things that are happening hundreds of miles away!' said Sirius angrily. 'Have you any idea what the Ministry would make of that information?'**

"They'd either lock Harry up for being a nutter, or try to use the ability to their advantage," said James sourly.

**Fred and George looked as though they could not care less what the Ministry made of anything. Ron was still ashen-faced and silent.**

**Ginny said, 'Somebody else could have told us... we could have heard it somewhere other than Harry.'**

"Oh really?" asked Remus sarcastically. "And who was this person that you could have heard it from?"

**'Like who?' said Sirius impatiently. 'Listen, your dad's been hurt while on duty for the Order and the circumstances are fishy enough without his children knowing about it seconds after it happened, you could seriously damage the Order's ‐'**

**'We don't care about the dumb Order!' shouted Fred.**

**'It's our dad dying we're talking about!' yelled George.**

**'Your father knew what he was getting into and he won't thank you for messing things up for the Order!' said Sirius, equally angry. This is how it is - this is why you're not in the Order - you don't understand - there are things worth dying for!'**

"Yeah," said Peter. "But my future self in this series obviously didn't think so."

"Well, you think so now and you're changing it, so it doesn't matter, Peter," said Lily.

**'Easy for you to say, stuck here!' bellowed Fred. 'I don't see you risking your neck!'**

"That's going too far," said Sirius. "My future self would be going out and fight if Dumbledore hadn't forbidden me! The wizarding world thinks I'm a criminal, so I can't exactly walk about outside!"

**The little colour remaining in Sirius's face drained from it. He looked for a moment as though he would quite like to hit Fred, but when he spoke, it was in a voice of determined calm.  
'I know it's hard, but we've all got to act as though we don't know anything yet. We've got to stay put, at least until we hear from your mother, all right?'**

**Fred and George still looked mutinous. Ginny, however, took a few steps over to the nearest chair and sank into it. Harry looked at Ron, who made a funny movement somewhere between a nod and a shrug, and they sat down too. The twins glared at Sirius for another minute, then took seats either side of Ginny.**

"Well, at least they're doing as Sirius says," said Remus.

**'That's right,' said Sirius encouragingly, 'come on, let's all... let's all have a drink while we're waiting. Accio Butterbeer!'**

**He raised his wand as he spoke and half a dozen bottles came flying towards them out of the pantry, skidded along the table, scattering the debris of Sinus's meal, and stopped neatly in front of the six of them. They all drank, and for a while the only sounds were those of the crackling of the kitchen fire and the soft thud of their bottles on the table.**

**Harry was only drinking to have something to do with his hands. His stomach was full of horrible hot, bubbling guilt. They would not be here if it were not for him; they would all still be asleep in bed. And it was no good telling himself that by raising the alarm he had ensured that Mr. Weasley was found, because there was also the inescapable business of it being he who had attacked Mr. Weasley in the first place.**

"You didn't attack Arthur!" exclaimed James. "It was the snake that did it, Harry! You just happened to see it through the snake's eyes."

**Don't be stupid, you haven't got fangs, he told himself, trying to keep calm, though the hand on his Butterbeer bottle was shaking, you were lying in bed, you weren't attacking anyone...**

**But then, what just happened in Dumbledore's office? he asked himself. I felt like I wanted to attack Dumbledore, too...  
He put the bottle down a little harder than he meant to, and it slopped over on to the table. No one took any notice. Then a burst of fire in midair illuminated the dirty plates in front of them and, as they gave cries of shock, a scroll of parchment fell with a thud on to the table, accompanied by a single golden phoenix tail feather.**

"A message deliver by Fawkes!" exclaimed Peter. "Must be from Dumbledore or Molly."

**'Fawkes!' said Sirius at once, snatching up the parchment. 'That's not Dumbledore's writing - it must be a message from your mother - here -'**

**He thrust the letter into George's hand, who ripped it open and read aloud: 'Dad is still alive. I am setting out for St. Mungo's now. Stay where you are. I will send news as soon as I can. Mum.'**

**George looked around the table. 'Still alive...' he said slowly. 'But that makes it sound...'**

The five of them flinched as they realized what George was getting at. "Oh, Arthur can't die!" cried Lily, face pale.

**He did not need to finish the sentence. It sounded to Harry, too, as though Mr. Weasley was hovering somewhere between life and death. Still exceptionally pale, Ron stared at the back of his mother's letter as though it might speak words of comfort to him. Fred pulled the parchment out of George's hands and read it for himself, then looked up at Harry, who felt his hand shaking on his Butterbeer bottle again and clenched it more tightly to stop the trembling.**

**If Harry had ever sat through a longer night than this one, he could not remember it. Sirius suggested once, without any real conviction, that they all go to bed, but the Weasleys' looks of disgust were answer enough. They mostly sat in silence around the table, watching the candle wick sinking lower and lower into liquid wax, occasionally raising a bottle to their lips, speaking only to check the time, to wonder aloud what was happening, and to reassure each other that if there was bad news, they would know straightaway, for Mrs. Weasley must long since have arrived at St. Mungo's.**

**Fred fell into a doze, his head lolling sideways on to his shoulder. Ginny was curled like a cat on her chair, but her eyes were open; Harry could see them reflecting the firelight. Ron was sitting with his head in his hands, whether awake or asleep it was impossible to tell. Harry and Sirius looked at each other every so often, intruders upon the family grief, waiting... waiting...**

**At ten past five in the morning by Ron's watch, the kitchen door swung open and Mrs. Weasley entered the kitchen. She was extremely pale, but when they all turned to look at her, Fred, Ron and Harry half rising from their chairs, she gave a wan smile.**

"It looks like Arthur's going to be all right!" cried James. "Or she wouldn't be looking like this!"

**'He's going to be all right,' she said, her voice weak with tiredness. 'He's sleeping. We can all go and see him later. Bill's sitting with him now; he's going to take the morning off work.'**

The Marauders and Lily cheered.

**Fred fell back into his chair with his hands over his face. George and Ginny got up, walked swiftly over to their mother and hugged her. Ron gave a very shaky laugh and downed the rest of his Butterbeer in one.**

**'Breakfast!' said Sirius loudly and joyfully, jumping to his feet. 'Where's that accursed house-elf? Kreacher! KREACHER!'  
But Kreacher did not answer the summons.**

**'Oh, forget it, then,' muttered Sirius, counting the people in front of him. 'So, it's breakfast for - let's see - seven... bacon and eggs, I think, and some tea, and toast -'**

**Harry hurried over to the stove to help. He did not want to intrude on the Weasleys' happiness and he dreaded the moment when Mrs. Weasley would ask him to recount his vision. However, he had barely taken plates from the dresser when Mrs. Weasley lifted them out of his hands and pulled him into a hug.**

**'I don't know what would have happened if it hadn't been for you, Harry,' she said in a muffled voice. 'They might not have found Arthur for hours, and then it would have been too late, but thanks to you he's alive and Dumbledore's been able to think up a good cover story for Arthur being where he was, you've no idea what trouble he would have been in otherwise, look at poor Sturgis...'**

"Yeah," said Remus. "But I don't think Molly's gratitude is going to make Harry feel any better."

**Harry could hardly bear her gratitude, but fortunately she soon released him to turn to Sirius and thank him for looking after her children through the night.**

**Sirius said he was very pleased to have been able to help, and hoped they would all stay with him as long as Mr. Weasley was in hospital.**

**'Oh, Sirius, I'm so grateful... they think he'll be there a little while and it would be wonderful to be nearer... of course, that might mean we're here for Christmas.'**

"I don't mind!" exclaimed Sirius. "That means I won't have to spend Christmas alone!"

**'The more the merrier!' said Sirius with such obvious sincerity that Mrs. Weasley beamed at him, threw on an apron and began to help with breakfast.**

**'Sirius,' Harry muttered, unable to stand it a moment longer. 'Can I have a quick word? Er - now?'**

**He walked into the dark pantry and Sirius followed. Without preamble, Harry told his godfather every detail of the vision he had had, including the fact that he himself had been the snake who had attacked Mr. Weasley.  
When he paused for breath, Sirius said, 'Did you tell Dumbledore this?'**

**'Yes,' said Harry impatiently, 'but he didn't tell me what it meant. Well, he doesn't tell me anything any more.'**

"If it had something to worry about, I think Dumbledore would have told you," said Peter.

**'I'm sure he would have told you if it was anything to worry about,' said Sirius steadily.**

**'But that's not all,' said Harry, in a voice only a little above a whisper. 'Sirius, I... I think I'm going mad. Back in Dumbledore's office, just before we took the Portkey... for a couple of seconds there I thought I was a snake, I felt like one - my scar really hurt when I was looking at Dumbledore - Sirius, I wanted to attack him!'**

"Maybe it's because of Harry's connection to Voldemort through the scar?" suggested Remus.

**He could only see a sliver of Sirius's face; the rest was in darkness.**

**'It must have been the aftermath of the vision, that's all,' said Sirius. 'You were still thinking of the dream or whatever it was and -'**

**'It wasn't that,' said Harry, shaking his head, 'it was like something rose up inside me, like there's a snake inside me.'**

**'You need to sleep,' said Sirius firmly. 'You're going to have breakfast, then go upstairs to bed, and after lunch you can go and see Arthur with the others. You're in shock, Harry; you're blaming yourself for something you only witnessed, and it's lucky you did witness it or Arthur might have died. Just stop worrying.'**

"Yeah, listen to me, Harry," said Sirius.

**He clapped Harry on the shoulder and left the pantry, leaving Harry standing alone in the dark.**

**Everyone but Harry spent the rest of the morning sleeping. He went up to the bedroom he and Ron had shared over the last few weeks of summer, but while Ron crawled into bed and was asleep within minutes, Harry sat fully clothed, hunched against the cold metal bars of the bedstead, keeping himself deliberately uncomfortable, determined not to fall into a doze, terrified that he might become the serpent again in his sleep and wake to find that he had attacked Ron, or else slithered through the house after one of the others...**

"You didn't become the serpent!" exclaimed Lily. "Harry, you simply saw what happened through the serpent's mind."

**When Ron woke up, Harry pretended to have enjoyed a refreshing nap too. Their trunks arrived from Hogwarts while they were eating lunch, so they could dress as Muggles for the trip to St. Mungo's. Everybody except Harry was riotously happy and talkative as they changed out of their robes into jeans and sweatshirts. When Tonks and Mad-Eye turned up to escort them across London, they greeted them gleefully, laughing at the bowler hat Mad-Eye was wearing at an angle to conceal his magical eye and assuring him, truthfully, that Tonks, whose hair was short and bright pink again, would attract far less attention on the Underground.**

**Tonks was very interested in Harry's vision of the attack on Mr. Weasley, something Harry was not remotely interested in discussing.**

**'There isn't any Seer blood in your family, is there?' she enquired curiously, as they sat side by side on a train rattling towards the heart of the city.**

"Of course not!" exclaimed James. "I don't want to be like Trelawney."

**'No,' said Harry, thinking of Professor Trelawney and feeling insulted.**

**'No,' said Tonks musingly, 'no, I suppose it's not really prophecy you're doing, is it? I mean, you're not seeing the future, you're seeing the present... it's odd, isn't it? Useful, though...'**

"Harry's not going to find it useful," said Peter.

**Harry didn't answer; fortunately, they got out at the next stop, a station in the very heart of London, and in the bustle of leaving the train he was able to allow ****Fred and George to get between himself and Tonks, who was leading the way. They all followed her up the escalator, Moody clunking along at the back of the group, his bowler tilted low and one gnarled hand stuck in between the buttons of his coat, clutching his wand. Harry thought he sensed the concealed eye staring hard at him. Trying to avoid any more questions about his dream, he asked Mad-Eye where St. Mungo's was hidden.**

**'Not far from here,' grunted Moody as they stepped out into the wintry air on a broad store-lined street packed with Christmas shoppers. He pushed Harry a little ahead of him and stumped along just behind; Harry knew the eye was rolling in all directions under the tilted hat. 'Wasn't easy to find a good location for a hospital. Nowhere in Diagon Alley was big enough and we couldn't have it underground like the Ministry - wouldn't be healthy. In the end they managed to get hold of a building up here. Theory was, sick wizards could come and go and just blend in with the crowd.'**

**He seized Harry's shoulder to prevent them being separated by a gaggle of shoppers plainly intent on nothing but making it into a nearby shop full of electrical gadgets.**

**'Here we go,' said Moody a moment later.**

**They had arrived outside a large, old-fashioned, red-brick department store called Purge &Dowse Ltd. The place had a shabby, miserable air; the window displays consisted of a few chipped dummies with their wigs askew, standing at random and modelling fashions at least ten years out of date. Large signs on all the dusty doors read: 'Closed for Refurbishment'. **

"It's always been closed for refurbishment," said James.

**Harry distinctly heard a large woman laden with plastic shopping bags say to her friend as they passed,**

**'It's never open, that place...'**

**'Right,' said Tonks, beckoning them towards a window displaying nothing but a particularly ugly female dummy. Its false eyelashes were hanging off and it was modelling a green nylon pinafore dress. 'Everybody ready?'**

**They nodded, clustering around her. Moody gave Harry another shove between the shoulder blades to urge him forward and Tonks leaned close to the glass, looking up at the very ugly dummy, her breath steaming up the glass. 'Wotcher,' she said, 'We're here to see Arthur Weasley.'**

**Harry thought how absurd it was for Tonks to expect the dummy to hear her talking so quietly through a sheet of glass, with buses rumbling along behind her and all the racket of a street full of shoppers. Then he reminded himself that dummies couldn't hear anyway. Next second, his mouth opened in shock as the dummy gave a tiny nod and beckoned with its jointed finger, and Tonks had seized Ginny and Mrs. Weasley by the elbows, stepped right through the glass and vanished.**

"So that's how you get to St. Mungo's!" exclaimed Lily. "I've never had to go there before."

**Fred, George and Ron stepped after them. Harry glanced around at the jostling crowd; not one of them seemed to have a glance to spare for window displays as ugly as those of Purge & Dowse Ltd; nor did any of them seem to have noticed that six people had just melted into thin air in front of them.**

**'C'mon,' growled Moody, giving Harry yet another poke in the back, and together they stepped forward through what felt like a sheet of cool water, emerging quite warm and dry on the other side.**

**There was no sign of the ugly dummy or the space where she had stood. They were in what seemed to be a crowded reception area where rows of witches and wizards sat upon rickety wooden chairs, some looking perfectly normal and perusing out-of-date copies of _Witch Weekly_, others sporting gruesome disfigurements such as elephant trunks or extra hands sticking out of their chests. The room was scarcely less quiet than the street outside, for many of the patients were making very peculiar noises: a sweaty-faced witch in the centre of the front row, who was fanning herself vigorously with a copy of the Daily Prophet, kept letting off a high-pitched whistle as steam came pouring out of her mouth; a grubby-looking warlock in the corner clanged like a bell every time he moved and, with each clang, his head vibrated horribly so that he had to seize himself by the ears to hold it steady.**

"Either a spell gone wrong or someone hexed them," said Sirius.

**Witches and wizards in lime-green robes were walking up and down the rows, asking questions and making notes on clipboards like Umbridge's. Harry noticed the emblem embroidered on their chests: a wand and bone, crossed.**

**'Are they doctors?' he asked Ron quietly.**

"No, they're Healers and Medwitches and wizards," said Remus.

**'Doctors?' said Ron, looking startled. 'Those Muggle nutters that cut people up? Nah, they're Healers.'  
**

**'Over here!' called Mrs. Weasley above the renewed clanging of the warlock in the corner, and they followed her to the queue in front of a plump blonde witch seated at a desk marked Enquiries. The wall behind her was covered in notices and posters saying things like: A CLEAN CAULDRON KEEPS POTIONS FROM BECOMING POISONS and ANTIDOTES ARE ANTI-DON'TS UNLESS APPROVED BY A QUALIFIED HEALER. There was also a large portrait of a witch with long silver ringlets which was labelled:  
Dilys Derwent  
St. Mungo's Healer 1722‐1741  
Headmistress of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry **

**Dilys was eyeing the Weasley party closely as though counting them; when Harry caught her eye she gave a tiny wink, walked sideways out of her portrait and vanished.**

"Dumbledore must have asked her to notify him when the Weasley party showed up," remarked Peter.

**Meanwhile, at the front of the queue, a young wizard was performing an odd on-the-spot jig and trying, in between yelps of pain, to explain his predicament to the witch behind the desk.**

**'It's these - ouch - shoes my brother gave me - ow - they're eating my - OUCH - feet - look at them, there must be some kind of - AARGH - jinx on them and I can't - AAAAARGH - get them off.' He hopped from one foot to the other as though dancing on hot coals.**

"Your brother must have a bone to pick with you if he sent you jinxed shoes," commented Sirius.

**'The shoes don't prevent you reading, do they?' said the blonde witch, irritably pointing at a large sign to the left of her desk. 'You want Spell Damage, fourth floor. Just like it says on the floor guide. Next!'**

**As the wizard hobbled and pranced sideways out of the way, the Weasley party moved forward a few steps and Harry read the floor guide:**

**ARTEFACT ACCIDENTS... Ground floor  
Cauldron explosion, wand backfiring, broom crashes, etc.  
CREATURE-INDUCED INJURIES... First floor  
Bites, stings, burns, embedded spines, etc.  
MAGICAL BUGS... Second floor  
Contagious maladies, e.g. dragon pox, vanishing sickness, scrojungulus, etc.  
POTION AND PLANT POISONING... Third floor  
Rashes, regurgitation, uncontrollable 2, etc.  
SPELL DAMAGE... Fourth floor  
Unliftable jinxes, hexes, incorrectly applied charms, etc.  
VISITORS' TEAROOM / HOSPITAL SHOP... Fifth floor  
IF YOU ARE UNSURE WHERE TO GO, INCAPABLE OF NORMAL SPEECH OR UNABLE TO REMEMBER WHY YOU ARE HERE, OUR WELCOMEWITCH WILL BE PLEASED TO HELP.**

**A very old, stooped wizard with a hearing trumpet had shuffled to the front of the queue now. 'I'm here to see Broderick Bode!' he wheezed.**

**'Ward forty-nine, but I'm afraid you're wasting your time,' said the witch dismissively. 'He's completely addled, you know - still thinks he's a teapot. Next!'**

**A harassed-looking wizard was holding his small daughter tightly by the ankle while she flapped around his head using the immensely large, feathery wings that had sprouted right out through the back of her romper suit.**

"I wonder how that happened," said James. "Maybe it was accidental magic."

**'Fourth floor,' said the witch, in a bored voice, without asking, and the man disappeared through the double doors beside the desk, holding his daughter like an oddly shaped balloon. 'Next!'**

**Mrs. Weasley moved forward to the desk.**

**'Hello,' she said, 'my husband, Arthur Weasley, was supposed to be moved to a different ward this morning, could you tell us ‐?'**

**'Arthur Weasley?' said the witch, running her finger down a long list in front of her. 'Yes, first floor, second door on the right, Dai Llewellyn Ward.'**

**'Thank you,' said Mrs Weasley. 'Come on, you lot.'  
They followed her through the double doors and along the narrow corridor beyond, which was lined with more portraits of famous Healers and lit by crystal bubbles full of candles that floated up on the ceiling, looking like giant soapsuds. More witches and wizards in lime-green robes walked in and out of the doors they passed; a foul-smelling yellow gas wafted into the passageway as they passed one door, and every now and then they heard distant wailing. They climbed a flight of stairs and entered the Creature-Induced Injuries corridor, where the second door on the right bore the words: 'Dangerous' Dai Llewellyn Ward: Serious Bites. Underneath this was a card in a brass holder on which had been handwritten: Healer-in-Charge: Hippocrates Smethwyck. Trainee Healer: Augustus Pye.**

**'We'll wait outside, Molly,' Tonks said. 'Arthur won't want too many visitors at once... it ought to be just the family first.'**

**Mad-Eye growled his approval of this idea and set himself with his back against the corridor wall, his magical eye spinning in all directions. Harry drew back, too, but Mrs. Weasley reached out a hand and pushed him through the door, saying, 'Don't be silly, Harry, Arthur wants to thank you.'**

"It's nice that the Weasleys see Harry as family," said Lily. "If he breaks up with Cho and ends up with Ginny, then he could really be part of the Weasley family."

**The ward was small and rather dingy, as the only window was narrow and set high in the wall facing the door. Most of the light came from more shining crystal bubbles clustered in the middle of the ceiling. The walls were of panelled oak and there was a portrait of a rather vicious-looking wizard on the wall, captioned: Urquhart Rackharrow, 1612—1697, Inventor of the Entrail-expelling Curse.**

**There were only three patients. Mr. Weasley was occupying the bed at the far end of the ward beside the tiny window. Harry was pleased and relieved to see that he was propped up on several pillows and reading the _Daily Prophet_ by the solitary ray of sunlight falling on to his bed. He looked up as they walked towards him and, seeing who it was, beamed.**

"Phew, he seems okay," said Peter in relief. "He just needs to heal from the snake bite."

**'Hello!' he called, throwing the _Prophet_ aside. 'Bill just left, Molly, had to get back to work, but he says he'll drop in on you later.'**

**'How are you, Arthur?' asked Mrs. Weasley, bending down to kiss his cheek and looking anxiously into his face. 'You're still looking a bit peaky.'**

**'I feel absolutely fine,' said Mr. Weasley brightly, holding out his good arm to give Ginny a hug. 'If they could only take the bandages off, I'd be fit to go home.'**

**'Why can't they take them off, Dad?' asked Fred.**

**'Well, I start bleeding like mad every time they try,' said Mr. Weasley cheerfully, reaching across for his wand, which lay on his bedside cabinet, and waving it so that six extra chairs appeared at his bedside to seat them all. 'It seems there was some rather unusual kind of poison in that snake's fangs that keeps wounds open. They're sure they'll find an antidote, though; they say they've had much worse cases than mine, and in the meantime I just have to keep taking a Blood-Replenishing Potion every hour. But that fellow over there,' he said, dropping his voice and nodding towards the bed opposite in which a man lay looking green and sickly and staring at the ceiling. 'Bitten by a werewolf, poor chap. No cure at all.'**

Remus winced. "Poor guy."

**'A werewolf?' whispered Mrs. Weasley, looking alarmed. 'Is he safe in a public ward? Shouldn't he be in a private room?'**

**'It's two weeks till full moon,' Mr. Weasley reminded her quietly. 'They've been talking to him this morning, the Healers, you know, trying to persuade him he'll be able to lead an almost normal life. I said to him - didn't mention names, of course - but I said I knew a werewolf personally, very nice man, who finds the condition quite easy to manage.'**

"That's because I take Wolfsbane Potion in the future and have dealt with it for most of my life."

**'What did he say?' asked George.**

**'Said he'd give me another bite if I didn't shut up,' said Mr. Weasley sadly. 'And that woman over there,' he indicated the only other occupied bed, which was right beside the door, 'won't tell the Healers what bit her, which makes us all think it must have been something she was handling illegally. Whatever it was took a real chunk out of her leg, very nasty smell when they take off the dressings.'**

**'So, you going to tell us what happened, Dad?' asked Fred, pulling his chair closer to the bed.**

**'Well, you already know, don't you?' said Mr. Weasley, with a significant smile at Harry. 'It's very simple - I'd had a very long day, dozed off, got sneaked up on and bitten.'**

**'Is it in the Prophet, you being attacked?' asked Fred, indicating the newspaper Mr. Weasley had cast aside.**

"I doubt it," replied Remus. "I don't think the Ministry would want everyone to know that a big serpent got in and attacked someone."

**'No, of course not,' said Mr. Weasley, with a slightly bitter smile, 'the Ministry wouldn't want everyone to know a dirty great serpent got —'**

**'Arthur!' Mrs. Weasley warned him.**

**'- got - er - me,' Mr. Weasley said hastily, though Harry was quite sure that was not what he had meant to say.**

**'So where were you when it happened, Dad?' asked George.**

**'That's my business,' said Mr. Weasley, though with a small smile. He snatched up the Daily Prophet, shook it open again and said, 'I was just reading about Willy Widdershins's arrest when you arrived. You know Willy turned out to be behind those regurgitating toilets back in the summer? One of his jinxes backfired, the toilet exploded and they found him lying unconscious in the wreckage covered from head to foot in -'**

They all winced, imagining what Willy Widdershins could have been covered in.

**"When you say you were 'on duty'," Fred interrupted in a low voice, "what were you doing?"**

**'You heard your father,' whispered Mrs. Weasley, 'we are not discussing this here! Go on about Willy Widdershins, Arthur.'**

**'Well, don't ask me how, but he actually got off the toilet charge,' said Mr. Weasley grimly. 'I can only suppose gold changed hands -'**

"Probably," said Sirius darkly. "That or information was exchanged for hsi release."

**'You were guarding it, weren't you?' said George quietly. 'The weapon? The thing You-Know-Who's after?'**

**'George, be quiet!' snapped Mrs. Weasley.**

**'Anyway,' said Mr. Weasley, in a raised voice, 'this time Willy's been caught selling biting doorknobs to Muggles and I don't think he'll be able to worm his way out of it because, according to this article, two Muggles have lost fingers and are now in St. Mungo's for emergency bone re-growth and memory modification. Just think of it, Muggles in St. Mungo's! I wonder which ward they're in?'**

"Arthur better calm down," said Peter. "He can't leave his bed and go looking for them."

**And he looked eagerly around as though hoping to see a signpost.**

**'Didn't you say You-Know-Who's got a snake, Harry?' asked Fred, looking at his father for a reaction. 'A massive one? You saw it the night he returned, didn't you?'**

**'That's enough,' said Mrs. Weasley crossly. 'Mad-Eye and Tonks are outside, Arthur, they want to come and see you. And you lot can wait outside,' she added to her children and Harry. 'You can come and say goodbye afterwards. Go on.'**

**They trooped back into the corridor. Mad-Eye and Tonks went in and closed the door of the ward behind them. Fred raised his eyebrows.**

**'Fine,' he said coolly, rummaging in his pockets, 'be like that. Don't tell us anything.'**

**'Looking for these?' said George, holding out what looked like a tangle of flesh-coloured string.**

"Extendable Ears!" exclaimed James and Sirius. "Perfect!"

**'You read my mind,' said Fred, grinning. 'Let's see if St. Mungo's puts Imperturbable Charms on its ward doors, shall we?'**

**He and George disentangled the string and separated five Extendable Ears from each other. Fred and George handed them around. Harry hesitated to take one.**

**'Go on, Harry, take it! You saved Dad's life. If anyone's got the right to eavesdrop on him, it's you.'  
Grinning in spite of himself, Harry took the end of the string and inserted it into his ear as the twins had done.**

**'OK, go!' Fred whispered.**

**The flesh-coloured strings wriggled like long skinny worms and snaked under the door. At first, Harry could hear nothing, then he jumped as he heard Tonks whispering as clearly as though she were standing right beside him.**

**'... they searched the whole area but couldn't find the snake anywhere. It just seems to have vanished after it attacked you, Arthur... but You-Know-Who can't have expected a snake to get in, can he?'**

"So it looks like Voldemort's involved, as we thought," said Remus.

**'I reckon he sent it as a lookout,' growled Moody, 'cause he's not had any luck so far, has he? No, I reckon he's trying to get a clearer picture of what he's facing and if Arthur hadn't been there the beast would've had a lot more time to look around. So, Potter says he saw it all happen?'**

**'Yes,' said Mrs. Weasley. She sounded rather uneasy. 'You know, Dumbledore seems almost to have been waiting for Harry to see something like this.'**

"_What_!?" exclaimed Lily. "Is it because of my son's connection to Voldemort?"

**'Yeah, well,' said Moody, 'there's something funny about the Potter kid, we all know that.'**

**'Dumbledore seemed worried about Harry when I spoke to him this morning,' whispered Mrs. Weasley.**

**'Course he's worried,' growled Moody. 'The boy's seeing things from inside You-Know-Who's snake. Obviously, Potter doesn't realise what that means, but if You-Know-Who's possessing him —'**

"Voldemort can't be possessing my son!" shouted James. "Harry would know if that was the case! He's have blanked-out times in his memory, where he doesn't remember what he was doing. That was what happened with Ginny when she was possessed by the diary! She couldn't remember what she did and so couldn't explain the paint or chicken feathers on her robes."

**Harry pulled the Extendable Ear out of his own, his heart hammering very fast and heat rushing up his face. He looked around at the others. They were all staring at him, the strings still trailing from their ears, looking suddenly fearful.**

"This is not good," said Peter. "Not good at all."

Lily sighed and took the book from Remus to read next.


	23. Christmas on the Closed Ward

Author's Note: I am sorry that it's been ages since I updated. I've been very busy with real life, and I also lost some interest in it. However, thanks to a preteen that e-mailed me, asking for copies of my first four fics and as to when I'd finish, spurred me to update. I did promise her in my reply, after all, that I would do my best to have a chapter or two up this weekend, and now I'm fulfilling it. I don't want to disappoint her, or any of my other readers, for that matter. Oh, if you wish to read the previous four fics in the series, e-mail me and I will send you copies. I would prefer e-mail, since not everyone who PMs me has their e-mail address on their profile page, and the only way their address shows up in a PM is if they actually write out things like 'dot' and 'at' instead of using '.' or '', or spacing things out, for some reason.

This chapter is dedicated to reviewers fathermoony, Sakura Reservoir Chronicles, Liria Nai, Half-Blood Metamorphmagus, and to Katherine, the person that spurred me to update.

**— CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE —  
Christmas on the Closed Ward **

**Was this why Dumbledore would no longer meet Harry's eyes? Did he expect to see Voldemort staring out of them, afraid, perhaps, that their vivid green might turn suddenly to scarlet, with catlike slits for pupils? Harry remembered how the snakelike face of Voldemort had once forced itself out of the back of Professor Quirrell's head and ran his hand over the back of his own, wondering what it would feel like if Voldemort burst out of his skull.**

"Not exactly," said Lily uncertainly. "But if you have access to Voldemort's thoughts and stuff, then the opposite could happen. Dumbledore obviously wouldn't want Voldemort reading his mind through Harry's."

**He felt dirty, contaminated, as though he were carrying some deadly germ, unworthy to sit on the Underground train back from the hospital with innocent, clean people whose minds and bodies were free of the taint of Voldemort… he had not merely seen the snake, he had been the snake, he knew it now…**

**A truly terrible thought then occurred to him, a memory bobbing to the surface of his mind, one that made his insides writhe and squirm like serpents.**

**What's he after, apart from followers?**

**Stuff he can only get by stealth… like a weapon. Something he didn't have last time. I'm the weapon, Harry thought, and it was as though poison were pumping through his veins, chilling him, bringing him out in a sweat as he swayed with the train through the dark tunnel. **

"Okay, Harry, you're being idiotic," said James. "The weapon is whatever the Order's guarding, not you, son."

Sirius sighed. "Maybe we should bring Harry and his friends back again and have a talk. And we can fix it so that they can stay longer. Like have the Room return them the exact time they left when it's for them to leave us. And maybe we can have them come from a different time, like after the end of the last book or something."

The others were intrigued by this idea and agreed. A moment later, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Neville, and Luna appeared. The Marauders and Lily noticed that Ron and Hermione were holding hands, which prompted Sirius to think _It's about bloody time those two got together, after it was made quite clear in the last book that they had a thing for each other._ Harry and Ginny were also holding hands, but they had let go a second after arrival, so nobody noticed that.

After looking around, Harry asked, "Why are we here again? Though I don't mind being back."

"Well, we're halfway through the book about your fifth year, Harry," said Remus. "And something that we read caused us to want to summon you and your friends."

"What is it?" asked Harry curiously.

"It's right after you and the Weasleys were visiting Arthur in St. Mungo's and you overheard that conversation," said Peter nervously.

Harry frowned, then remembered what Peter was talking about. "Oh, that. I was being stupid. But then Hermione turned up and Ginny spoke with me, so I got over it."

"Okay," said Lily. "Anyway, why don't you guys stay for awhile and read the books with us? We can ask the Room to return you to exact same time you left so nobody else in the future will know that you've gone. Oh, and what time did we take you guys from? We wished for the time after the end of the last book, but we could have messed up."

"I don't think you messed up," said Hermione. "That is, if the last book is about what went on during -" A note appeared from Perdita, warning her, plus her friends, to not give away anything that the Marauders and Lily hadn't read about yet that was really important, or they would be returned to their own time. Hermione quickly changed what she had to say to "During seventh year. And sixth year for Ginny and Luna."

Another note appeared from Perdita. "Well, not including the epilogue, the last book is about the final year, so there is no mess up. Anyway, Lily, continue reading, and then Harry or one of his friends can read the next chapter."

**I'm the one Voldemort's trying to use, that's why they've got guards around me everywhere I go, it's not for my protection, it's for other people's, only it's not working, they can't have someone on me all the time at Hogwarts… I did attack Mr. Weasley last night, it was me. Voldemort made me do it and he could be inside me, listening to my thoughts right now –**

"If that's the case, how did you leave the castle, Harry?" demanded Lily.

Harry rolled his eyes. "Hermione already told me that I was wrong, so you don't need to get on my case, Mum." He felt slightly weird calling someone that was almost his age 'Mum', but he didn't exactly feel comfortable calling her 'Lily' either.

Ginny cuffed him on the arm. "That's no way to talk to your mother, Harry!"

"Sorry, Mum, it's just that this has already happened." Lily accepted the apology and continued reading.

"**Are you all right, Harry, dear?" whispered Mrs. Weasley leaning across Ginny to speak to him as the train rattled along through its dark tunnel. "You don't look very well. Are you feeling sick?"**

**They were all watching him. He shook his head violently and stared up at an advertisement for home insurance.**

"**Harry, dear, are you sure you're all right?" said Mrs. Weasley in a worried voice, as they walked around the unkempt patch of grass in the middle of Grimmauld Place. "You look ever so pale… are you sure you slept this morning? You go upstairs to bed right now and you can have a couple of hours of sleep before dinner, all right?"**

"I'm really glad Molly's there for you if we can't," James said, a sad smile on his face. Harry nodded, and though he and his father were currently about the same age, got up and hugged him.

**He nodded; here was a ready-made excuse not to talk to any of the others, which was precisely what he wanted, so when she opened the front door he hurried straight past the troll's-leg umbrella stand, up the stairs and into his and Ron's bedroom.**

**Here, he began to pace up and down, past the two beds and Phineas Nigellus's empty picture frame, his brain teeming and seething with questions and ever more dreadful ideas.**

**How had he become a snake? Perhaps he was an Animagus… no, he couldn't be, he would know… perhaps Voldemort was an Animagus… yes, thought Harry, that would fit, he would turn into a snake of course… **

"Though that is possible, it's more likely that Moldywart was possessing his snake, Nagini," said Remus thoughtfully.

**and when he's possessing me, then we both transform… that still doesn't explain how I got to London and back to my bed in the space of about five minutes… but then Voldemort's about the most powerful wizard in the world, apart from Dumbledore, it's probably no problem at all to him to transport people like that.**

Hermione snorted. "Harry, how thick are you? If I had known that you were thinking _that_, I would have done more than what I did to talk sense into you."

"I'm glad you didn't," replied Harry. "Besides, what you did worked."

**And then, with a terrible stab of panic, he thought, but this is insane - if Voldemort's possessing me, I'm giving him a clear view into the Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix right now!**

**He'll know who's in the Order and where Sirius is… and I've heard loads of stuff I shouldn't have, everything Sirius told me the first night I was here…**

**There was only one thing for it: he would have to leave Grimmauld Place straightaway. **

Everyone looked at Harry. "How could you even think that?" asked Lily incredulously. "Use your brain!"

"Yeah, if Dumbledore had you go to Grimmauld Place, then that would tell you that it's safe to be there," said Peter.

"See?" said James. "Even Peter is thinking straight, and he's not really the smartest person in the world. No offense, Wormtail."

"None taken," said Peter, shrugging. "Besides, it's true."

**He would spend Christmas at Hogwarts without the others, which would keep them safe over the holidays at least… but no, that wouldn't do, there were still plenty of people at Hogwarts to maim and injure. What if it was Seamus, Dean or Neville next time? He stopped his pacing and stood staring at Phineas Nigellus's empty frame. A leaden sensation was settling in the pit of his stomach. He had no alternative: he was going to have to return to Privet Drive, cut himself off from other wizards entirely.**

Everyone looked at Harry again, who snapped, "It's already happened! Hermione, Ron, and Ginny talked some sense into me and I didn't follow through on that thought."

"Okay, Bolter," said Sirius. At Harry's questioning look, he added, "That's the Marauder nickname we came up for you. Ron and Hermione are Firecannon and Shimi, which is 'bookworm' in Japanese."

Ron was pleased with his Marauder name, Hermione was a bit uncertain but in the end accepted it, and Harry wasn't exactly thrilled with his nickname. It wasn't until Lily suggested, "Then maybe we can call you Bambi instead" that Harry decided that Bolter wasn't so bad after all. The non-Muggleborns in the room looked confused until Hermione explained that there was a Muggle movie about a fawn named Bambi and reminded Ginny, Luna, and Neville that James's Animagus form was a stag.

The Marauders looked intrigued and Lily continued, "If we compared Harry to Bambi, then maybe Ron and Hermione would be Thumper the rabbit and Flower the skunk, Bambi's two best friend. But who would Faline be?"

"Who's Faline?" asked Neville.

"Bambi's girlfriend," replied Hermione. "They met as fawns and started out as ordinary friends, but when they grew up they fell in love."

Harry, who had seen _Bambi_ in primary school, said, "But in the movie, didn't Thumper fall in love with a female rabbit and Flower with a female skunk? So the comparasion wouldn't really work for you and Ron after a certain point."

"True," said James, recalling that Hermione and Ron had been holding hands when they'd appeared. "Anyway, who would Faline be? Cho Chang?"

"Nope," answered Ginny, grinning, knowing perfectly well that she was the equvalient of Faline. "It's someone else, but I can't tell you who."

James and Lily looked thoughtfully at her, having an idea as to whom it might be, due to the thing about Potter men falling in love with redheads, but didn't say anything.

**Well, if he had to do it, he thought, there was no point hanging around. Trying with all his might not to think how the Dursleys were going to react when they found him on their doorstep six months earlier than they had expected, he strode over to his trunk, slammed the lid shut and locked it, then glanced around automatically for Hedwig before remembering that she was still at Hogwarts - well, her cage would be one less thing to carry - he seized one end of his trunk and had dragged it halfway towards the door when a snide voice said, "Running away, are we?"**

**He looked around. Phineas Nigellus had appeared on the canvas of his portrait and was leaning against the frame, watching Harry with an amused expression on his face.**

"Maybe my something great-grandfather will be able to talk some sense into Harry," said Sirius, though he sounded doubtful.

"**Not running away, no," said Harry shortly, dragging his trunk a few more feet across the room.**

"**I thought," said Phineas Nigellus, stroking his pointed beard, "that to belong in Gryffindor house you were supposed to be brave! It looks to me as though you would have been better off in my own house. We Slytherins are brave, yes, but not stupid. For instance, given the choice, we will always choose to save our own necks."**

"**It's not my own neck I'm saving," said Harry tersely, tugging the trunk over a patch of particularly uneven, moth-eaten carpet right in front of the door.**

"**Oh, I see," said Phineas Nigellus, still stroking his beard, "this is no cowardly flight - you are being noble."**

"Harry, do you always have to be so noble?" asked Lily.

Harry shrugged and thinking about the final battle, said, "Sometimes being so noble comes in handy, Mum. And I am a Gryffindor, and most of us are noble."

**Harry ignored him. His hand was on the doorknob when Phineas Nigellus said lazily, "I have a message for you from Albus Dumbledore."**

**Harry spun round.**

"**What is it?"**

"'**Stay where you are.'"**

"**I haven't moved!" said Harry, his hand still upon the doorknob. "So what's the message?"**

"I think that was Dumbledore's message, Harry," Remus said.

"**I have just given it to you, dolt," said Phineas Ni gellus smoothly. "Dumbledore says, 'Stay where you are.'"**

"**Why?" said Harry eagerly, dropping the end of his trunk. "Why does he want me to stay? What else did he say?"**

"**Nothing whatsoever," said Phineas Nigellus, raising a thin black eyebrow as though he found Harry impertinent.**

**Harry's temper rose to the surface like a snake rearing from long grass. He was exhausted, he was confused beyond measure, he had experienced terror, relief, then terror again in the last twelve hours, and still Dumbledore did not want to talk to him!**

"**So that's it, is it?" he said loudly. "'Stay where you are'! That's all anyone could tell me after I got attacked by those Dementors, too! Just stay put while the grown-ups sort it out, Harry! We won't bother telling you anything, though, because your tiny little brain might not be able to cope with it!"**

"Harry James Potter!" exclaimed Lily. "You need to control your temper!" Harry looked apologetic.

"**You know," said Phineas Nigellus, even more loudly than Harry "this is precisely why I loathed being a teacher! Young people are so infernally convinced that they are absolutely right about everything. Has it not occurred to you, my poor puffed-up popinjay, that there might be an excellent reason why the Headmaster of Hogwarts is not confiding every tiny detail of his plans to you? Have you never paused, while feeling hard-done-by, to note that following Dumbledore's orders has never yet led you into harm? No. No, like all young people, you are quite sure that you alone feel and think, you alone recognize danger, you alone are the only one clever enough to realize what the Dark Lord may be planning -"**

"**He is planning something to do with me, then?" said Harry swiftly.**

"**Did I say that?" said Phineas Nigellus, idly examining his silk gloves. "Now, if you will excuse me, I have better things to do than listen to adolescent agonising… good-day to you."**

**And he strolled to the edge of his frame and out of sight.**

"**Fine, go then!" Harry bellowed at the empty frame. "And tell Dumbledore thanks for nothing!"**

"Harry!" exclaimed Hermione. "I can't believe you said that!"

"Well, it's too late to do anything about it now. And I did feel sorry for what I said later on."

**The empty canvas remained silent. Fuming, Harry dragged his trunk back to the foot of his bed, then threw himself face down on the moth-eaten covers, his eyes shut, his body heavy and aching.**

**He felt as though he had journeyed for miles and miles… it seemed impossible that less than twenty-four hours ago Cho Chang had been approaching him under the mistletoe… he was so tired… he was scared to sleep… yet he did not know how long he could fight it… Dumbledore had told him to stay… that must mean he was allowed to sleep… but he was scared… what if it happened again?**

**He was sinking into shadows…**

**It was as though a film in his head had been waiting to start. ****He was walking down a deserted corridor towards a plain black door, past rough stone walls, torches, and an open doorway on to a flight of stone steps leading downstairs on the left…**

**He reached the black door but could not open it… he stood gazing at it, desperate for entry… something he wanted with all his heart lay beyond… a prize beyond his dreams… if only his scar would stop prickling… then he would be able to think more clearly…**

"What's going on?" asked Peter. "Why are you keep dreaming about this corridor?"

"Because Moldywart wants me to," answered Harry, wishing that he had learned Occulemency properly and so wouldn't have kept dreaming about the corridor and getting the false vision about Sirius.

"**Harry," said Ron's voice, from far, far away, "Mum says dinner's ready, but she'll save you something if you want to stay in bed."**

**Harry opened his eyes, but Ron had already left the room.**

"Actually, I did wait a minute for you to answer me, but when you didn't, I left," said Ron.

"Oh, I didn't know that," apologized Harry.

**He doesn't want to be on his own with me, Harry thought. Not after what he heard Moody say.**

**He supposed none of them would want him there any more, now that they knew what was inside him.**

**He would not go down to dinner; he would not inflict his company on them. He turned over on to his other side and, after a while, dropped back off to sleep. He woke much later, in the early hours of the morning, his insides aching with hunger and Ron snoring in the next bed. **

**Squinting around the room, he saw the dark outline of Phineas Nigellus standing again in his portrait and it occurred to Harry that Dumbledore had probably sent Phineas Nigellus to watch over him, in case he attacked somebody else.**

**The feeling of being unclean intensified. He half-wished he had not obeyed Dumbledore… if this was how life was going to be for him in Grimmauld Place from now on, maybe he would be better off in Privet Drive after all.**

**Everybody else spent the following morning putting up Christmas decorations. Harry could not remember Sirius ever being in such a good mood; he was actually singing carols, apparently delighted that he was to have company over Christmas. **

"That's great!" exclaimed James. "It's nice that you'll have a happy Christmas, Padfoot."

**Harry could hear his voice echoing up through the floor in the cold drawing room where he was sitting alone, watching the sky growing whiter outside the windows, threatening snow, all the time feeling a savage pleasure that he was giving the others the opportunity to keep talking about him, as they were bound to be doing.**

"Well, we weren't talking about you in the way you were thinking," said Ginny. "We were more worried about you than anything else."

**When he heard Mrs. Weasley calling his name softly up the stairs around lunchtime, he retreated further upstairs and ignored her.**

**Around six o'clock in the evening the doorbell rang and Mrs. Black started screaming again.**

**Assuming that Mundungus or some other Order member had come to call, Harry merely settled himself more comfortably against the wall of Buckbeak's room where he was hiding, trying to ignore how hungry he felt as he fed dead rats to the Hippogriff. It came as a slight shock when somebody hammered hard on the door a few minutes later.**

"Sounds like Hermione," said Sirius with a grin. "She was banging on the door when Hagrid holed himself up after Skeeter's article."

"**I know you're in there," said Hermione's voice. "Will you please come out? I want to talk to you."**

"**What are you doing here?" Harry asked her, pulling open the door as Buckbeak resumed his scratching at the straw-strewn floor for any fragments of rat he may have dropped. "I thought you were skiing with your mum and dad?"**

"Why did you open the door to Hermione when you weren't talking to anyone?" asked Peter.

"She just caught me off guard with that," responded Harry. "If Ron or Ginny had done the same, I probably would have opened the door for them too."

"**Well, to tell the truth, skiing's not really my thing," said Hermione. "So, I've come here for Christmas." There was snow in her hair and her face was pink with cold. "But don't tell Ron. I told him it's really good because he kept laughing so much. **

"I knew it," Ron said, laughing.

**Mum and Dad are a bit disappointed, but I've told them that everyone who is serious about the exams is staying at Hogwarts to study. They want me to do well, they'll understand. Anyway," she said briskly, "let's go to your bedroom, Ron's mum has lit a fire in there and she's sent up sandwiches."**

**Harry followed her back to the second floor. When he entered the bedroom, he was rather surprised to see both Ron and Ginny waiting for them, sitting on Ron's bed.**

"Reminds me what happened when James told me he knew I was a werewolf," commented Remus. "I was afraid that he was going to stop being my friend, but then he dragged me up to our dorm room, where Sirius and Peter were, and the three of them proceeded to tell me that they were still my friends and were going to find a way to keep me company during the full moon so I wouldn't have to suffer alone. I couldn't talk them out of the last bit, though."

"**I came on the Knight Bus," said Hermione airily, pulling off her jacket before Harry had time to speak. "Dumbledore told me what had happened first thing this morning, but I had to wait for term to end officially before setting off. Umbridge is already livid that you lot disappeared right under her nose, even though Dumbledore told her Mr. Weasley was in St. Mungo's and he'd given you all permission to visit. So…"**

**She sat down next to Ginny, and the two girls and Ron all looked up at Harry.**

"**How're you feeling?" asked Hermione.**

"**Fine," said Harry stiffly.**

"**Oh, don't lie, Harry," she said impatiently. "Ron and Ginny say you've been hiding from everyone since you got back from St. Mungo's."**

"**They do, do they?" said Harry, glaring at Ron and Ginny. Ron looked down at his feet but Ginny seemed quite unabashed.**

"That's a switch," commented James. "Ginny used to be the one that would hide from Harry's gaze."

"Well, I got over my fangirl crush and started showing my true self around Harry," said Ginny.

"**Well, you have!" she said. "And you won't look at any of us!"**

"**It's you lot who won't look at me!" said Harry angrily.**

"**Maybe you're taking it in turns to look, and keep missing each other," suggested Hermione, the corners of her mouth twitching.**

The Marauders and Lily couldn't help smiling at this.

"**Very funny," snapped Harry, turning away.**

"**Oh, stop feeling all misunderstood," said Hermione sharply. "Look, the others have told me what you overheard last night on the Extendable Ears -"**

"**Yeah?" growled Harry, his hands deep in his pockets as he watched the snow now falling thickly outside. "All been talking about me, have you? Well, I'm getting used to it."**

"**We wanted to talk to you, Harry," said Ginny, "but as you've been hiding ever since we got back -"**

"**I didn't want anyone to talk to me," said Harry, who was feeling more and more nettled.**

"**Well, that was a bit stupid of you," said Ginny angrily, "seeing as you don't know anyone but me who's been possessed by You-Know-Who, and I can tell you how it feels."**

James and Lily shook their heads. "You really didn't think of that, did you, Harry?" asked James.

"Well, I sort of forgot about that, Dad, er, James," said Harry. He felt awkward saying Dad, but saying 'James' wasn't that comfortable either, though it was better than 'Dad'.

**Harry remained quite still as the impact of these words hit him. Then he wheeled round.**

"**I forgot," he said.**

"**Lucky you," said Ginny coolly.**

"**I'm sorry" Harry said, and he meant it. "So… so, do you think I'm being possessed, then?"**

"**Well, can you remember everything you've been doing?" Ginny asked. "Are there big blank periods where you don't know what you've been up to?"**

**Harry racked his brains.**

"**No," he said.**

"**Then You-Know-Who hasn't ever possessed you," said Ginny simply. "When he did it to me, I couldn't remember what I'd been doing for hours at a time. I'd find myself somewhere and not know how I got there."**

**Harry hardly dared believe her, yet his heart was lightening almost in spite of himself.**

"I'm glad I could help," Ginny said with a smile.

"**That dream I had about your dad and the snake, though —"**

"**Harry you've had these dreams before," Hermione said. "You had flashes of what Voldemort was up to last year."**

"**This was different," said Harry, shaking his head. "I was inside that snake. It was like I was the snake… what if Voldemort somehow transported me to London —?"**

"**One day," said Hermione, sounding thoroughly exasperated, "you'll read _Hogwarts, A History_, and perhaps it will remind you that you can't Apparate or Disapparate inside Hogwarts. Even Voldemort couldn't just make you fly out of your dormitory, Harry."**

"**You didn't leave your bed, mate," said Ron. "I saw you thrashing around in your sleep for at least a minute before we could wake you up."**

**Harry started pacing up and down the room again, thinking. What they were all saying was not only comforting, it made sense… without really thinking, he took a sandwich from the plate on the bed and crammed it hungrily into his mouth.**

**I'm not the weapon after all, thought Harry. His heart swelled with happiness and relief, and he felt like joining in as they heard Sirius tramping past their door towards Buckbeak's room, singing "God Rest Ye, Merry Hippogriffs" at the top of his voice.**

"Okay, I think Sirius, or should I say Snuffles, has lost it now," said James, chortling.

"Hey, I'm just glad that my godson and the Weasleys are spending Christmas with me," huffed Sirius. "And don't call me Snuffles. Just because my future self came up with that silly alias doesn't mean you can call me that."

**How could he have dreamed of returning to Privet Drive for Christmas? Sirius's delight at having the house full again, and especially at having Harry back, was infectious. He was no longer their sullen host of the summer; now he seemed determined that everyone should enjoy themselves as much, if not more than they would have done at Hogwarts, and he worked tirelessly in the run-up to Christmas Day, cleaning and decorating with their help, so that by the time they all went to bed on Christmas Eve the house was barely recognisable. The tarnished chandeliers were no longer hung with cobwebs but with garlands of holly and gold and silver streamers; magical snow glittered in heaps over the threadbare carpets; a great Christmas tree, obtained by Mundungus and decorated with live fairies, blocked Sirius's family tree from view, and even the stuffed elf-heads on the hall wall wore Father Christmas hats and beards.**

**Harry awoke on Christmas morning to find a stack of presents at the foot of his bed and Ron already halfway through opening his own, rather larger, pile.**

"**Good haul this year," he informed Harry through a cloud of paper. "Thanks for the Broom Compass, it's excellent; beats Hermione's - she got me a homework planner–"**

"So you didn't like it," said Hermione, looking disappointed.

"Did you expect me to?" demanded Ron. "You know I'm not like you when it comes to homework and stuff like that."

**Harry sorted through his presents and found one with Hermione's handwriting on it. She had given him, too, a book that resembled a diary except that it said things like "Do it today or later you'll pay!" every time he opened a page.**

"Why did you give them that?" asked Remus. "You usually give them stuff that they like."

"Well, it was OWL year and they weren't focusing as much on their schoolwork, so I thought it would help," defended Hermione.

**Sirius and Lupin had given Harry a set of excellent books entitled _Practical Defensive Magic and Its Use Against the Dark Arts_, which had superb, moving color illustrations of all the counterjinxes and hexes it described. Harry flicked through the first volume eagerly; he could see it was going to be highly useful in his plans for the D.A.. Hagrid had sent a furry brown wallet that had fangs, which were presumably supposed to be an anti-theft device, but unfortunately prevented Harry putting any money in without getting his fingers ripped off. Tonks's present was a small, working model of a Firebolt, ****which Harry watched fly around the room, wishing he still had his full-size version; Ron had given him an enormous box of Every-Flavour Beans, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley the usual hand-knitted jumper and some mince pies, and Dobby a truly dreadful painting that Harry suspected had been done by the elf himself. He had just turned it upside-down to see whether it looked better that way when, with a loudcrack, Fred and George Apparated at the foot of his bed.**

"**Happy Christmas," said George. "Don't go downstairs for a bit."**

"**Why not?" said Ron.**

"**Mum's crying again," said Fred heavily. "Percy sent back his Christmas jumper."**

"I can't believe he did that!" snapped Sirius. "What a git."

"Percy did redeem himself eventually," said Ron. "Though I can't tell you how."

"It better be good," said Sirius furiously. "Especially after the way he's been behaving."

"**Without a note," added George. "Hasn't asked how Dad is or visited him or anything."**

The Marauders and Lily looked angry, and the rest, except for Luna and Neville, who didn't really know Percy well, looked uncomfortable. Percy had redeemed himself and the Weasleys and Harry and Hermione had forgiven him, but the book was making them remember the bad things he had done.

"**We tried to comfort her," said Fred, moving around the bed to look at Harry's portrait. "Told her Percy's nothing more than a humungous pile of rat droppings."**

"**Didn't work," said George, helping himself to a Chocolate Frog. "So Lupin took over. Best let him cheer her up before we go down for breakfast, I reckon."**

"Yeah, he's the most sensitive of us Marauders," said James.

"**What's that supposed to be, anyway?" asked Fred, squinting at Dobby's painting. "Looks like a gibbon with two black eyes."**

"**It's Harry!" said George, pointing at the back of the picture, "says so on the back!"**

"Must look exactly like you then," said Sirius, smirking. There were chuckles from everyone except Harry and James, who glared at Sirius.

"**Good likeness," said Fred, grinning. Harry threw his new homework diary at him; it hit the wall opposite and fell to the floor where it said happily: "If you've dotted the 'i's and crossed the 't's then you may do whatever you please!"**

**They got up and dressed. They could hear the various inhabitants of the house calling "Happy Christmas" to one another. On their way downstairs they met Hermione.**

"**Thanks for the book, Harry," she said happily. "I've been wanting that _New Theory of Numerology_ for ages! **

"Well, you kept mentioning for the past couple of months, Hermione," pointed out Harry with a wry smile.

**And that perfume's really unusual, Ron."**

"You gave her perfume!" James exclaimed. He and the other males in the room, besides Ron and Remus, laughed at this.

"Come on, it's just another hint that Ron and Hermione will get together," said Remus. "And judging from the fact that they were holding hands when they appeared, I'd say that they did end up together."

"How was the perfume, Hermione?" asked Lily. "Did you like it?'

"Yes," Hermione nodded. "Not something I'd wear every day, but it was a nice scent."

"**No problem," said Ron. "Who's that for, anyway?" he added, nodding at the neatly wrapped present she was carrying.**

"**Kreacher," said Hermione brightly.**

"**It had better not be clothes!" Ron warned her. "You know what Sirius said: Kreacher knows too much, we can't set him free!"**

"**It isn't clothes," said Hermione, "although if I had my way I'd certainly give him something to wear other than that filthy old rag. No, it's a patchwork quilt, I thought it would brighten up his bedroom."**

"If it came from you, then I doubt he'll use it," said Sirius sourly.

"**What bedroom?" said Harry, dropping his voice to a whisper as they were passing the portrait of Sirius's mother.**

"**Well, Sirius says it's not so much a bedroom, more a kind of -den," said Hermione. "Apparently he sleeps under the boiler in that cupboard off the kitchen."**

**Mrs. Weasley was the only person in the basement when they arrived there. She was standing at the stove and sounded as though she had a bad head cold as she wished them "Happy Christmas," and they all averted their eyes.**

"**So, is this Kreacher's bedroom?" said Ron, strolling over to a dingy door in the corner opposite the pantry. Harry had never seen it open.**

"**Yes," said Hermione, now sounding a little nervous. "Er… I think we'd better knock."**

**Ron rapped on the door with his knuckles but there was no reply.**

"**He must be sneaking around upstairs," he said, and without further ado pulled open the door. "Urgh!"**

**Harry peered inside. Most of the cupboard was taken up with a very large and old-fashioned boiler, but in the foot's space underneath the pipes Kreacher had made himself something that looked like a nest. A jumble of assorted rags and smelly old blankets were piled on the floor and the small dent in the middle of it showed where Kreacher curled up to sleep every night. Here and there among the material were stale bread crusts and mouldy old bits of cheese. In a far corner glinted small objects and coins that Harry guessed Kreacher had saved, magpie-like, from Sirius's purge of the house, and he had also managed to retrieve the silver-framed family photographs that Sirius had thrown away over the summer. Their glass might be shattered, but still the little black-and-white people inside them peered up at him haughtily, including - he felt a little jolt in his stomach - the dark, heavy-lidded woman whose trial he had witnessed in Dumbledore's Pensieve: Bellatrix Lestrange. **

Lily choked right after she read that and Sirius looked angry, though not as much as Neville.

**By the looks of it, hers was Kreacher's favorite photograph; he had placed it to the fore of all the others and had mended the glass clumsily with Spellotape.**

"**I think I'll just leave his present here," said Hermione, laying the package neatly in the middle of the depression in the rags and blankets and closing the door quietly. "He'll find it later, that'll be fine."**

"**Come to think of it," said Sirius, emerging from the pantry carrying a large turkey as they closed the cupboard door, "has anyone actually seen Kreacher lately?"**

"**I haven't seen him since the night we came back here," said Harry. "You were ordering him out of the kitchen."**

"**Yeah…" said Sirius, frowning. "You know, I think that's the last time I saw him, too… he must be hiding upstairs somewhere."**

"**He couldn't have left, could he?" said Harry. "I mean, when you said 'out', maybe he thought you meant get out of the house?"**

"**No, no, house-elves can't leave unless they're given clothes. They're tied to their family's house," said Sirius.**

"Looks like my future self doesn't know about Dobby," said Sirius, frowning. "This doesn't sound good.:"

"**They can leave the house if they really want to," Harry contradicted him. "Dobby did, he left the Malfoys' to give me warnings two years ago. He had to punish himself afterwards, but he still managed it."**

**Sirius looked slightly disconcerted for a moment, then said, "I'll look for him later, I expect I'll find him upstairs crying his eyes out over my mother's old bloomers or something. Of course, he might have crawled into the airing cupboard and died… but I mustn't get my hopes up."**

"Sirius!" Hermione admonished. "Don't say that."

"And Kreacher didn't turn out so-" Harry broke off as he realized that it would be revealing stuff in the last book.

"I suppose Kreacher redeemed himself in the end like Percy did," said Sirius heavily, having guessed what Harry was going to say. "Okay, I'm sorry for what I said."

**Fred, George and Ron laughed; Hermione, however, looked reproachful.**

**Once they had eaten their Christmas lunch, the Weasleys, Harry and Hermione were planning to pay Mr. Weasley another visit, escorted by Mad-Eye and Lupin. Mundungus turned up in time for Christmas pudding and trifle, having managed to 'borrow' a car for the occasion, as the Underground did not run on Christmas Day. The car, which Harry doubted very much had been taken with the knowledge or consent of it's owner, had had a similar Enlarging Spell put upon it as the Weasley's old Ford Anglia; although normally proportioned outside, ten people with Mundungus driving were able to fit into it quite comfortably. Mrs. Weasley hesitated before getting inside - Harry knew her disapproval of Mundungus was battling with her dislike of traveling without magic - but, finally, the cold outside and her children's pleading triumphed, and she settled herself into the back seat between Fred and Bill with good grace.**

**The journey to St. Mungo's was quite quick as there was very little traffic on the roads. A small trickle of witches and wizards was creeping furtively up the otherwise deserted street to visit the hospital. Harry and the others got out of the car, and Mundungus drove off around the corner to wait for them. They strolled casually towards the window where the dummy in green nylon stood, then, one by one, stepped through the glass.**

**The reception area looked pleasantly festive: the crystal orbs that illuminated St. Mungo's had been colored red and gold to become gigantic, glowing Christmas baubles; holly hung around every doorway; and shining white Christmas trees covered in magical snow and icicles glittered in every corner, each one topped with a gleaming gold star. It was less crowded than the last time they had been there, although halfway across the room Harry found himself shunted aside by a witch with a walnut jammed up her left nostril.**

"Ah, the usual argument when family members get together for Christmas," said James, chuckling.

"**Family argument, eh?" smirked the blonde witch behind the desk. "You're the third I've seen today… Spell Damage, fourth floor."**

**They found Mr. Weasley propped up in bed with the remains of his turkey dinner on a tray on his lap and a rather sheepish expression on his face.**

"Sounds like Arthur did something," commented Peter. "I wonder what he did?"

"**Everything all right, Arthur?" asked Mrs. Weasley, after they had all greeted Mr. Weasley and handed over their presents.**

"**Fine, fine," said Mr. Weasley, a little too heartily. "You — er — haven't seen Healer Smethwyck, have you?"**

"**No," said Mrs. Weasley suspiciously, "why?"**

"Looks like he did do something," said Remus, sahking his head.

"I hope it was something good that we can all laugh about!" said Sirius, grinning.

"**Nothing, nothing," said Mr. Weasley airily, starting to unwrap his pile of gifts. "Well, everyone had a good day? What did you all get for Christmas? Oh, Harry - this is absolutely wonderful!" For he had just opened Harry's gift of fuse-wire and screwdrivers.**

Everyone chuckled over that and Lily remarked, "Well, you know what kind of gifts people will like, Harry."

**Mrs. Weasley did not seem entirely satisfied with Mr. Weasley's answer. As her husband leaned over to shake Harry's hand, she peered at the bandaging under his nightshirt.**

"**Arthur," she said, with a snap in her voice like a mousetrap, "you've had your bandages changed. Why have you had your bandages changed a day early, Arthur? They told me they wouldn't need doing until tomorrow."**

"**What?" said Mr. Weasley, looking rather frightened and pulling the bed covers higher up his chest. "No, no - it's nothing - it's -I-"**

**He seemed to deflate under Mrs. Weasley's piercing gaze.**

"**Well - now don't get upset, Molly, but Augustus Pye had an idea… he's the Trainee Healer, you know, lovely young chap and very interested in… um… complementary medicine… I mean, some of these old Muggle remedies… well, they're called stitches, Molly, and they work very well on - on Muggle wounds -"**

"What are stitches?" asked James.

"It's when wounds get sewn back together," explained Hermione. "Only it didn't work very well for Mr. Weasley, since there's something the venom that probably dissovled them. But they work very well on non-magical wounds."

**Mrs. Weasley let out an ominous noise somewhere between a shriek and a snarl. Lupin strolled away from the bed and over to the werewolf, who had no visitors and was looking rather wistfully at the crowd around Mr. Weasley; Bill muttered something about getting himself a cup of tea and Fred and George leapt up to accompany him, grinning.**

"**Do you mean to tell me," said Mrs. Weasley, her voice growing louder with every word and apparently unaware that her fellow visitors were scurrying for cover, "that you have been messing about with Muggle remedies?"**

"**Not messing about, Molly, dear," said Mr. Weasley imploringly, "it was just - just something Pye and I thought we'd try - only, most unfortunately — well, with these particular kinds of wounds - it doesn't seem to work as well as we'd hoped -"**

"**Meaning?"**

"**Well… well, I don't know whether you know what - what stitches are?"**

"**It sounds as though you've been trying to sew your skin back together," said Mrs. Weasley with a snort of mirthless laughter, "but even you, Arthur, wouldn't be that stupid —"**

"Actually, he was," said Sirius with a laugh.

"**I fancy a cup of tea, too," said Harry, jumping to his feet.**

**Hermione, Ron and Ginny almost sprinted to the door with him. As it swung closed behind them, they heard Mrs. Weasley shriek, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, TH AT'S THE GENERAL IDEA?"**

Neville looked at the trio and Ginny. "So is that why you I ran into you guys?"

"Yeah," answered Ron, turning red.

"**Typical Dad," said Ginny, shaking her head as they set off up the corridor. "Stitches… I ask you…"**

"**Well, you know, they do work well on non-magical wounds," said Hermione fairly. "I suppose something in that snake's venom dissolves them or something. I wonder where the tearoom is?"**

"**Fifth floor," said Harry, remembering the sign over the welcome witch's desk.**

**They walked along the corridor, through a set of double doors and found a rickety staircase lined with more portraits of brutal-looking Healers. As they climbed it, the various Healers called out to them, diagnosing odd complaints and suggesting horrible remedies. Ron was seriously affronted when a medieval wizard called out that he clearly had a bad case of spattergroit.**

The trio and Ginny smiled at that, since that was what the ghoul disgused as Ron pretended to have when the trio were on the Horcrux hunt.

"**And what's that supposed to be?" he asked angrily, as the Healer pursued him through six more portraits, shoving the occupants out of the way.**

"**Tis a most grievous affliction of the skin, young master, that will leave you pockmarked and more gruesome even than you are now -"**

"**Watch who you're calling gruesome!" said Ron, his ears turning red.**

"**- the only remedy is to take the liver of a toad, bind it tight about your throat, stand naked at the full moon in a barrel of eels' eyes -"**

Everyone was shaking with laughter, even Ron, who now found it funny in retrospect.

"**I have not got spattergroit!"**

"**But the unsightly blemishes upon your visage, young master -"**

"**They're freckles!" said Ron furiously. "Now get back in your own picture and leave me alone!" He rounded on the others, who were all keeping determinedly straight faces.**

"**What floor's this?"**

"**I think it's the fifth," said Hermione.**

"**Nah, it's the fourth," said Harry, "one more —"**

**But as he stepped on to the landing he came to an abrupt halt, staring at the small window set into the double doors that marked the start of a corridor signposted SPELL DAMAGE. A man was peering out at them all with his nose pressed against the glass. He had wavy blond hair, bright blue eyes and a broad vacant smile that revealed dazzlingly white teeth.**

"It sounds like Lockhart," said Peter. "But it can't be."

"It is," answered Ginny.

"**Blimey!" said Ron, also staring at the man.**

"**Oh, my goodness," said Hermione suddenly, sounding breathless. "Professor Lockhart!"**

**Their ex-Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher pushed open the doors and moved towards them, wearing a long lilac dressing gown.**

"**Well, hello there!" he said. "I expect you'd like my autograph, would you?"**

"It looks like he still remembers some stuff," said James, grinning.

"**Hasn't changed much, has he?" Harry muttered to Ginny, who grinned.**

"**Er — how are you, Professor?" said Ron, sounding slightly guilty. It had been Ron's malfunctioning wand that had damaged Professor Lockhart's memory so badly that he had landed in St. Mungo's in the first place,**

"The prat deserved it," said Sirius dismissively.

"Oh, is that how it happened?" asked Luna. "I thought Wrackspurts had gotten in his brain and fuzzed his thoughts so that he couldn't remember a thing."

**though as Lockhart had been attempting to permanently wipe Harry and Ron's memories at the time, Harry's sympathy was limited.**

"**I'm very well indeed, thank you!" said Lockhart exuberantly, pulling a rather battered peacockfeather quill from his pocket. "Now, how many autographs would you like? I can do joined-up writing now, you know!"**

"**Er - we don't want any at the moment, thanks," said Ron, raising his eyebrows at Harry, who asked, "Professor, should you be wandering around the corridors? Shouldn't you be in a ward?"**

**The smile faded slowly from Lockhart's face. For a few moments he gazed intently at Harry, then he said, "Haven't we met?"**

"**Er… yeah, we have," said Harry. "You used to teach us at Hogwarts, remember?"**

"**Teach?" repeated Lockhart, looking faintly unsettled. "Me? Did I?"**

**And then the smile reappeared upon his face so suddenly it was rather alarming.**

"**Taught you everything you know, I expect, did I? **

"He definitely hasn't changed much," said Remus, shaking his head.

**Well, how about those autographs, then? Shall we say a round dozen, you can give them to all your little friends then and nobody will be left out!"**

**But just then a head poked out of a door at the far end of the corridor and a voice called, "Gilderoy, you naughty boy, where have you wandered off to?"**

**A motherly-looking Healer wearing a tinsel wreath in her hair came bustling up the corridor, smiling warmly at Harry and the others.**

"**Oh, Gilderoy, you've got visitors! How lovely, and on Christmas Day, too! Do you know, he never gets visitors, poor lamb, and I can't think why, he's such a sweetie, aren't you?"**

"**We're doing autographs!" Gilderoy told the Healer with another glittering smile. "They want loads of them, won't take no for an answer! I just hope we've got enough photographs!"**

"**Listen to him," said the Healer, taking Lockhart's arm and beaming fondly at him as though he were a precocious two-year-old. "He was rather well known a few years ago; we very much hope that this liking for giving autographs is a sign that his memory might be starting to come back. Will you step this way? He's in a closed ward, you know, he must have slipped out while I was bringing in the Christmas presents, the door's usually kept locked… not that he's dangerous! But," she lowered her voice to a whisper, "he's a bit of a danger to himself, bless him… doesn't know who he is, you see, wanders off and can't remember how to get back… it is nice of you to have come to see him."**

"**Er," said Ron, gesturing uselessly at the floor above, "actually, we were just — er -"**

**But the Healer was smiling expectantly at them, and Ron's feeble mutter of "going to have a cup of tea" trailed away into nothingness. They looked at each other helplessly, then followed Lockhart and his Healer along the corridor.**

"I feel sorry for you guys," said James. "Having to put up with Lockhart."

"It gets worse," muttered Harry, but only his friends heard him.

"It's all right," Neville replied in the same quiet tone. "At least this way, you don't find out when Bellatrix and the rest break out from Azkaban and wonder why I'm so worked up and all."

"But we never comforted you or anything!" protested Hermione.

"I didn't mind, especially since I didn't want any pity or anything like that from you guys," said Neville.

"What are you guys talking about?" asked Peter.

"We can't tell you," answered Ginny. "You'll find out in a few minutes, though."

"**Let's not stay long," Ron said quietly.**

**The Healer pointed her wand at the door of the Janus Thickey Ward and muttered, "Alohomora."**

**The door swung open and she led the way inside, keeping a firm grasp on Gilderoy's arm until she had settled him into an armchair beside his bed.**

"**This is our long-term residents' ward," she informed Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny in a low voice. "For permanent spell damage, you know. Of course, with intensive remedial potions and charms and a bit of luck, we can produce some improvement. Gilderoy does seem to be getting back some sense of himself; and we've seen a real improvement in Mr. Bode, he seems to be regaining the power of speech very well, though he isn't speaking any language we recognize yet. Well, I must finish giving out the Christmas presents, I'll leave you all to chat."**

**Harry looked around. The ward bore unmistakable signs of being a permanent home to its residents. They had many more personal effects around their beds than in Mr. Weasley's ward; the wall around Gilderoy's headboard, for instance, was papered with pictures of himself, all beaming toothily and waving at the new arrivals. He had autographed many of them to himself in disjointed, childish writing. The moment he had been deposited in his chair by the Healer, Gilderoy pulled a fresh stack of photographs towards him, seized a quill and started signing them all feverishly.**

"**You can put them in envelopes," he said to Ginny, **

"Oh, I loved doing that," said Ginny sarcastically, though she laughed at the same time.

**throwing the signed pictures into her lap one by one as he finished them. "I am not forgotten, you know, no, I still receive a very great deal of fan mail… Gladys Gudgeon writes weekly… I just wish I knew why." He paused, looking faintly puzzled, then beamed again and returned to his signing with renewed vigour. "I suspect it is simply my good looks…"**

**A sallow-skinned, mournful-looking wizard lay in the bed opposite staring at the ceiling; he was mumbling to himself and seemed quite unaware of anything around him. Two beds along was a woman whose entire head was covered in fur; Harry remembered something similar happening to Hermione during their second year, although fortunately the damage, in her case, had not been permanent.**

**At the far end of the ward flowery curtains had been drawn around two beds to give the occupants and their visitors some privacy.**

The ones from the future, besides Luna, looked uncomfortable at this, Neville most of all.

"**Here you are, Agnes," said the Healer brightly to the furry-faced woman, handing her a small pile of Christmas presents. "See, not forgotten, are you? And your son's sent an owl to say he's visiting tonight, so that's nice, isn't it?"**

**Agnes gave several loud barks.**

"**And look, Broderick, you've been sent a potted plant and a lovely calendar with a different fancy Hippogriff for each month; they'll brighten things up, won't they?" said the Healer, ****bustling along to the mumbling man, setting a rather ugly plant with long, swaying tentacles on the bedside cabinet and fixing the calendar to the wall with her wand. "And - oh, Mrs. Longbottom, are you leaving already?"**

**Harry's head span round. The curtains had been drawn back from the two beds at the end of the ward and two visitors were walking back down the aisle between the beds: a formidable-looking old witch wearing a long green dress, a moth-eaten fox fur and a pointed hat decorated with what was unmistakeably a stuffed vulture and, trailing behind her looking thoroughly depressed - Neville.**

**With a sudden rush of understanding, Harry realized who the people in the end beds must be. He cast around wildly for some means of distracting the others so that Neville could leave the ward unnoticed and unquestioned, **

"Thanks, Harry," said Neville. "Hey, I never asked you how you know about my parents."

"I found out in a memory of Dumbledore's," explained Harry. "It was about the trial of the Lestranges and Crouch Jr. Dumbledore made me promise not to tell anyone."

"Would you have told someone if you hadn't promised?"

"Maybe Ron and Hermione, since I tell them just about everything, but definitely not anyone else, Neville."

**but Ron had also looked up at the sound of the name "Longbottom", and before Harry could stop him had called out, "Neville!"**

**Neville jumped and cowered as though a bullet had narrowly missed him.**

"**It's us, Neville!" said Ron brightly, getting to his feet. "Have you seen -? Lockhart's here! Who've you been visiting?"**

"**Friends of yours, Neville, dear?" said Neville's grandmother graciously, bearing down upon them all.**

**Neville looked as though he would rather be anywhere in the world but here. A dull purple flush was creeping up his plump face and he was not making eye contact with any of them.**

"**Ah, yes," said his grandmother, looking closely at Harry and sticking out a shrivelled, clawlike hand for him to shake. "Yes, yes, I know who you are, of course. Neville speaks most highly of you."**

"**Er - thanks," said Harry, shaking hands. Neville did not look at him, but surveyed his own feet, the color deepening in his face all the while.**

"**And you two are clearly Weasleys," Mrs. Longbottom continued, proffering her hand regally to Ron and Ginny in turn. "Yes, I know your parents — not well, of course — but fine people, fine people… and you must be Hermione Granger?"**

**Hermione looked rather startled that Mrs. Longbottom knew her name, but shook hands all the same.**

"Yeah, I've mentioned you guys a few times to Gran," said Neville, looking embarrassed.

"We don't mind," said Hermione kindly.

"**Yes, Neville's told me all about you. Helped him out of a few sticky spots, haven't you? He's a good boy," she said, casting a sternly appraising look down her rather bony nose at Neville, "but he hasn't got his father's talent, I'm afraid to say." **

"That's not nice of her," said Lily, frowning. "Your grandmother doesn't need to be so hard on you."

Neville shrugged. "She's proud of me eventually."

**And she jerked her head in the direction of the two beds at the end of the ward, so that the stuffed vulture on her hat trembled alarmingly.**

"**What?" said Ron, looking amazed. (Harry wanted to stamp on Ron's foot, but that sort of thing is much harder to bring off unnoticed when you're wearing jeans rather than robes.) "Is that your dad down the end, Neville?"**

"**What's this?" said Mrs. Longbottom sharply. "Haven't you told your friends about your parents, Neville?"**

**Neville took a deep breath, looked up at the ceiling and shook his head. Harry could not remember ever feeling sorrier for anyone, but he could not think of any way of helping Neville out of the situation.**

"**Well, it's nothing to be ashamed of!" said Mrs. Longbottom angrily. "You should be proud, Neville, proud! They didn't give their health and their sanity so their only son would be ashamed of them, you know!"**

"**I'm not ashamed," said Neville, very faintly, still looking anywhere but at Harry and the others.**

"That's the truth," said Neville quietly. "I just didn't want people knowing because I didn't want them pitying me or being nice to me because of it."

Lily got up and hugged him, then returned to reading.

**Ron was now standing on tiptoe to look over at the inhabitants of the two beds.**

"**Well, you've got a funny way of showing it!" said Mrs. Longbottom. "My son and his wife," she said, turning haughtily to Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny, "were tortured into insanity by You- Know-Who's followers."**

**Hermione and Ginny both clapped their hands over their mouths. Ron stopped craning his neck to catch a glimpse of Neville's parents and looked mortified.**

"**They were Aurors, you know, and very well respected within the wizarding community" Mrs. Longbottom went on. "Highly gifted, the pair of them. I - yes, Alice dear, what is it?"**

**Neville's mother had come edging down the ward in her nightdress. She no longer had the plump, happy-looking face Harry had seen in Moody's old photograph of the original Order of the Phoenix. Her face was thin and worn now, her eyes seemed overlarge and her hair, which had turned white, was wispy and dead-looking. She did not seem to want to speak, or perhaps she was not able to, **

"She can't talk," said Neville quietly, a sad look on his face.

**but she made timid motions towards Neville, holding something in her outstretched hand.**

"**Again?" said Mrs. Longbottom, sounding slightly weary. "Very well, Alice dear, very well - Neville, take it, whatever it is."**

**But Neville had already stretched out his hand, into which his mother dropped an empty Drooble's Best Blowing Gum wrapper.**

"**Very nice, dear," said Neville's grandmother in a falsely cheery voice, patting his mother on the shoulder. But Neville said quietly, "Thanks, Mum."**

**His mother tottered away, back up the ward, humming to herself. Neville looked around at the others, his expression defiant, as though daring them to laugh, but Harry did not think he'd ever found anything less funny in his life.**

The Marauders looked very sad and Lily began crying. "This is horrible! And Alice is a good friend of mine too! It was bad enough reading what happened in the last book, but actually reading about what they are like in the future is ten times worse!" James patted her and when she had calmed down, she resumed reading.

"**Well, we'd better get back," sighed Mrs Longbottom, drawing on long green gloves. "Very nice to have met you all. Neville, put that wrapper in the bin, she must have given you enough of them to paper your bedroom by now."**

**But as they left, Harry was sure he saw Neville slip the candy wrapper into his pocket.**

"I always keep them," said Neville, blinking as if he was holding back tears. "Like Gran said, I have enough to paper my bedroom." Lily hugged hugged him again before she continued reading.

**The door closed behind them.**

"**I never knew," said Hermione, who looked tearful.**

"**Nor did I," said Ron rather hoarsely.**

"**Nor me," whispered Ginny.**

**They all looked at Harry.**

"**I did," he said glumly. "Dumbledore told me but I promised I wouldn't tell anyone… that's what Bellatrix Lestrange got sent to Azkaban for, using the Cruciatus Curse on Neville's parents until they lost their minds."**

"**Bellatrix Lestrange did that?" whispered Hermione, horrified. "That woman Kreacher's got a photo of in his den?"**

**There was a long silence, broken by Lockharts angry voice.**

"**Look, I didn't learn joined-up writing for nothing, you know!"**

"That's the end of the chapter," said Lily sadly, wishing for a way to comfort Neville besides her hugs. Just then a note appeared, that read, "You know, you can bring other people to this room, though you will have to tell them about what's happened so far in the books."

She frowned at it, then realized something. Taking the Marauders aside, she said, "We could bring Frank and Alice here so that way Neville can see his parents when they're not like the way they are in St. Mungo's. They're trustworthy, and I am friends with Alice. And it's hardly fair for Harry to get to spend time with James and me and Neville can't spend some time with his parents. Even if we're currently the same age as them."

"You have a point, Lily," said James. "So should we do it?"

Author's Note: It is up to the readers to decide if Frank and Alice Longbottom appear, get briefed on the books, and get to stay for the rest of the reading and spend some time with Neville. Please go to my profile page and vote in the poll on it. Thanks.


	24. Occlumency

Author's Note: The votes have been tallied and a majority of people have wanted Franks and Alice Longbottom to appear. So they have come, be briefed on everything, stay around for the rest of the book at the very least, and spend time with Neville.

This chapter is dedicated to Buffy8fan, 14hp1, The Queen of Confusion, Rose Midnight Moonlight Black, and A Cromwell Witch.

The Marauders and Lily decided to have Frank and Alice appear, since Neville deserved a chance to get to know his parents when they were well. So they told Harry and his friends of their decision and made their wish. A second later, Frank and Alice appeared, arms entwined around each other and snogging. Neville turned red and looked away, embarrassed, while James and Sirius started laughing. Lily cleared her throat as Alice and Frank sprang apart and looked around, confused. "You're in the Room of Requirement," Lily explained. "We wished for the two of you to appear." She went on to explain why they wished them here.

Finally food appeared (courtesy of the house-elves), and everyone ate dinner while the books were summarised very thoroughly. Frank and Alice were quite shocked to find out their fate in the future, or at least the future if it wasn't changed, and the deaths of Lily and James. They were excited to meet their future son and his friends, though, and pleased with the measures that had been taken so far to keep the future in the books from happening. When dinner and the summary of the books were over, Alice took the fifth book and began reading.

**— CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE —  
Occlumency**

**Kreacher, it transpired, had been lurking in the attic. Sirius said he had found him up there, covered in dust, no doubt looking for more relics of the Black family to hide in his cupboard. Though Sirius seemed satisfied with this story, it made Harry uneasy. Kreacher seemed to be in a better mood on his reappearance, his bitter muttering had subsided somewhat and he submitted to orders more docilely than usual, though once or twice Harry caught the house-elf staring at him avidly, but always looking quickly away whenever he saw that Harry had noticed.**

"This doesn't sound good," said Sirius worriedly, a frown on his face. "What is Kreacher up to?

**Harry did not mention his vague suspicions to Sirius, whose cheerfulness was evaporating fast now that Christmas was over. As the date of their departure back to Hogwarts drew nearer, he became more and more prone to what Mrs. Weasley called 'fits of the sullens', in which he would become taciturn and grumpy, often withdrawing to Buckbeak's room for hours at a time. His gloom seeped through the house, oozing under doorways like some noxious gas, so that all of them became infected by it.**

"It's not as if the place could get any worse," muttered Sirius, still frowning over Kreacher's behavior.

**Harry didn't want to leave Sirius again with only Kreacher for company; in fact, for the first time in his life, he was not looking forward to returning to Hogwarts. Going back to school would mean placing himself once again under the tyranny of Dolores Umbridge, who had no doubt managed to force through another dozen decrees in their absence; there was no Quidditch to look forward to now that he had been banned; there was every likelihood that their burden of homework would increase as the exams drew even nearer; and Dumbledore remained as remote as ever. In fact, if it hadn't been for the D.A., Harry thought he might have begged Sirius to let him leave Hogwarts and remain in Grimmauld Place.**

Sirius looked at Harry in shock, who simply shrugged and said, "I just wanted to be with you and not leave you alone with Kreacher."

**Then, on the very last day of the holidays, something happened that made Harry positively dread his return to school.**

"**Harry, dear," said Mrs. Weasley, poking her head in to his and Ron's bedroom, where the pair of them were playing wizard chess watched by Hermione, Ginny and Crookshanks, "could you come down to the kitchen? Professor Snape would like a word with you."**

"What for?" asked Frank, surprised.

"Something terrible, I bet," said James darkly.

"But it could be something else," said Alice reasonably. "Dumbledore might have wanted Snape to pass on a message or-"

"If it was a message, Dumbledore could have asked the portrait of Phineas Nigellus to do that," pointed out Remus. "It must be for a different reason."

**Harry did not immediately register what she had said; one of his castles was engaged in a violent tussle with a pawn of Ron's and he was egging it on enthusiastically.**

"**Squash him - squash him, he's only a pawn, you idiot. Sorry, Mrs. Weasley, what did you say?"**

"**Professor Snape, dear. In the kitchen. He'd like a word."**

**Harry's mouth fell open in horror. He looked around at Ron, Hermione and Ginny, all of whom were gaping back at him. Crookshanks, whom Hermione had been restraining with difficulty for the past quarter of an hour, leapt gleefully on to the board and set the pieces running for cover, squealing at the top of their voices.**

"**Snape?" said Harry blankly.**

"**Professor Snape, dear," said Mrs. Weasley reprovingly. "Now come on, quickly, he says he can't stay long."**

"**What's he want with you?" said Ron, looking unnerved as Mrs. Weasley withdrew from the room. "You haven't done anything, have you?"**

"I don't think so, or we would have read about it," said Peter nervously.

"It's not about something I've done wrong," said Harry. "You'll find out what it is after the next few paragraphs."

"**No!" said Harry indignantly, racking his brains to think what he could have done that would make Snape pursue him to Grimmauld Place. Had his last piece of homework perhaps earned a T? A minute or two later, he pushed open the kitchen door to find Sirius and Snape both seated at the long kitchen table, glaring in opposite directions. The silence between them was heavy with mutual dislike. A letter lay open on the table in front of Sirius.**

"**Er," said Harry, to announce his presence.**

**Snape looked around at him, his face framed between curtains of greasy black hair.**

"**Sit down, Potter."**

"**You know," said Sirius loudly, leaning back on his rear chair legs and speaking to the ceiling, "I think I'd prefer it if you didn't give orders here, Snape. It's my house, you see."**

"Sirius, don't antagonise Severus," reproved Lily. "Then he'll just be meaner to Harry."

**An ugly flush suffused Snape's pallid face. Harry sat down in a chair beside Sirius, facing Snape across the table.**

"**I was supposed to see you alone, Potter," said Snape, the familiar sneer curling his mouth, "but Black -"**

"**I'm his godfather," said Sirius, louder than ever.**

"**I am here on Dumbledore's orders," said Snape, whose voice, by contrast, was becoming more and more quietly waspish, "but by all means stay, Black, I know you like to feel… involved."**

"**What's that supposed to mean?" said Sirius, letting his chair fall back on to all four legs with a loud bang.**

"**Merely that I am sure you must feel - ah - frustrated by the fact that you can do nothing useful," Snape laid a delicate stress on the word, "for the Order."**

There were immediate protests and everyone was glaring at the book, except for Harry, who had given up hating Snape after seeing those memories, Hermione, and Luna.

**It was Sirius's turn to flush. Snape's lip curled in triumph as he turned to Harry.**

"**The Headmaster has sent me to tell you, Potter, that it is his wish for you to study Occlumency this term."**

"Oh," said Neville. "Is that what you were doing, Harry? You told us that you had Remedial Potions."

"Snape told me not to tell anyone, so I didn't, except for Hermione and Ron, since I tell them just almost everything anyway."

"Then that means the greasy bas- (here Lily glared) er, git, taught you! But why couldn't Dumbledore teach you Occlumency?" grumbled Sirius.

"Dumbledore's probably too busy," answered Remus. "And if Moldywarts has access to Harry's mind, then Dumbledore would hardly want to open his mind to being read."

"**Study what?" said Harry blankly.**

**Snape's sneer became more pronounced.**

"**Occlumency, Potter. The magical Defense of the mind against external penetration. An obscure branch of magic, but a highly useful one."**

"Is it just me, or has Snape gotten worse than he is now?" asked Frank.

"He's gotten worse," replied James. "Though he has saved Harry's life before, so I guess he's not that bad." Harry wondered what everyone's reactions would be when they got towards the end of the last book and read about Snape's memories, and wished things had turned out better for Snape, minus the ending up with Lily part. Harry couldn't stand the thought of not exisiting, or exisiting, but having Snape for a father instead of James.

**Harry's heart began to pump very fast indeed. Defense against external penetration? But he was not being possessed, they had all agreed on that…**

"No, but that doesn't mean that people can't read your mind," said Lily.

"**Why do I have to study Occlu — thing?" he blurted out.**

"**Because the Headmaster thinks it a good idea," said Snape smoothly. "You will receive private lessons once a week, but you will not tell anybody what you are doing, least of all Dolores Umbridge. You understand?"**

**"Yes," said Harry. "Who's going to be teaching me?"**

**Snape raised an eyebrow.**

"**I am," he said.**

Lily hugged her son and James frowned, wishing that Dumbledore, or someone else that Harry trusted, could have taught Harry.

**Harry had the horrible sensation that his insides were melting.**

**Extra lessons with Snape - what on earth had he done to deserve this? He looked quickly round at Sirius for support.**

"**Why can't Dumbledore teach Harry?" asked Sirius aggressively. "Why you?"**

"**I suppose because it is a headmaster's privilege to delegate less enjoyable tasks," said Snape silkily. "I assure you I did not beg for the job." He got to his feet. "I will expect you at six o'clock on Monday evening, Potter. My office. If anybody asks, you are taking Remedial Potions. Nobody who has seen you in my classes could deny you need them."**

"Harry's only rubbush at Potions because of you!" snapped Remus. "I'm sure Harry would do well if you weren't the teacher!"

"That's not quite true," Harry muttered under his breath, so only Ron, Hermione, and Ginny heard him.

**He turned to leave, his black traveling cloak billowing behind him.**

"**Wait a moment," said Sirius, sitting up straighter in his chair.**

**Snape turned back to face them, sneering.**

"**I am in rather a hurry, Black. Unlike you, I do not have unlimited leisure time."**

"**I'll get to the point, then," said Sirius, standing up. He was rather taller than Snape who, Harry noticed, balled his fist in the pocket of his cloak over what Harry was sure was the handle of his wand. "If I hear you're using these Occlumency lessons to give Harry a hard time, you'll have me to answer to."**

"**How touching," Snape sneered. "But surely you have noticed that Potter is very like his father?"**

"**Yes, I have," said Sirius proudly.**

"**Well then, you'll know he's so arrogant that criticism simply bounces off him," Snape said sleekly.**

"That's not true!" cried Lily angrily. "Harry is more like me! So why can't you see past the similarities in looks to James and find me in him! My son has my own eyes, after all."

Harry hugged his mother and patted her, whispering, "It's all right."

**Sirius pushed his chair roughly aside and strode around the table towards Snape, pulling out his wand as he went. Snape whipped out his own. They were squaring up to each other, Sirius looking livid, Snape calculating, his eyes darting from Sirius's wand-tip to his face.**

"**Sirius!" said Harry loudly, but Sirius appeared not to hear him.**

"**I've warned you, Snivellus," said Sirius, his face barely a foot from Snape's, "I don't care if Dumbledore thinks you've reformed, I know better -"**

Harry grimaced, not liking this part. Sirius was definitely going to have to eat his words at the end of the seventh book. Snape might not have been the nicest person on earth, but he certainly had been on Dumbledore's side, for the sake of Lily.

"**Oh, but why don't you tell him so?" whispered Snape. "Or are you afraid he might not take very seriously the advice of a man who has been hiding inside his mother's house for six months?"**

"**Tell me, how is Lucius Malfoy these days? I expect he's delighted his lapdog's working at Hogwarts, isn't he?"**

"**Speaking of dogs," said Snape softly, "did you know that Lucius Malfoy recognized you last time you risked a little jaunt outside? Clever idea, Black, getting yourself seen on a safe station platform… gave you a cast-iron excuse not to leave your hidey-hole in future, didn't it?"**

**Sirius raised his wand.**

"**NO!" Harry yelled, vaulting over the table and trying to get in between them. "Sirius, don't!"**

"**Are you calling me a coward?" roared Sirius, trying to push Harry out of the way, but Harry would not budge.**

"**Why, yes, I suppose I am," said Snape.**

"**Harry - get - out - of - it!" snarled Sirius, pushing him aside with his free hand.**

"I'm not going to move," said Harry. "I didn't want the two of you to start dueling."

**The kitchen door opened and the entire Weasley family, plus Hermione, came inside, all looking very happy, with Mr. Weasley walking proudly in their midst dressed in a pair of striped pajamass covered by a mackintosh.**

"**Cured!" he announced brightly to the kitchen at large. "Completely cured!"**

**He and all the other Weasleys froze on the threshold, gazing at the scene in front of them, which was also suspended in mid-action, both Sirius and Snape looking towards the door with their wands pointing into each other's faces and Harry immobile between them, a hand stretched out to each, trying to force them apart.**

"**Merlin's beard," said Mr. Weasley, the smile sliding off his face, "what's going on here?"**

"Starting up an old ruvalry again," said Remus, casting a stern look at Sirius, who actually had the grace to look somewhat embarrassed.

**Both Sirius and Snape lowered their wands. Harry looked from one to the other. Each wore an expression of utmost contempt, yet the unexpected entrance of so many witnesses seemed to have brought them to their senses. Snape pocketed his wand, turned on his heel and swept back across the kitchen, passing the Weasleys without comment. At the door he looked back.**

"**Six o'clock, Monday evening, Potter."**

**And he was gone. Sirius glared after him, his wand at his side.**

"**What's been going on?" asked Mr. Weasley again.**

"**Nothing, Arthur," said Sirius, who was breathing heavily as though he had just run a long distance. "Just a friendly little chat between two old school friends." **

"Liar," said Remus, looking sternly at Sirius again.

**With what looked like an enormous effort, he smiled. "So… you're cured? That's great news, really great."**

"**Yes, isn't it?" said Mrs. Weasley, leading her husband forward to a chair. "Healer Smethwyck worked his magic in the end, found an antidote to whatever that snake's got in its fangs, and Arthur's learned his lesson about dabbling in Muggle medicine, haven't you, dear?" she added, rather menacingly.**

"**Yes, Molly, dear," said Mr. Weasley meekly.**

**That night's meal should have been a cheerful one, with Mr. Weasley back amongst them. Harry could tell Sirius was trying to make it so, yet when his godfather was not forcing himself to laugh loudly at Fred and George's jokes or offering everyone more food, his face fell back into a moody, brooding expression. Harry was separated from him by Mundungus and Mad-Eye, who had dropped in to offer Mr. Weasley their congratulations. He wanted to talk to Sirius, to tell him he shouldn't listen to a word Snape said, that Snape was goading him deliberately and that the rest of them didn't think Sirius was a coward for doing as Dumbledore told him and remaining in Grimmauld Place. But he had no opportunity to do so, and, eyeing the ugly look on Sirius's face, Harry wondered occasionally whether he would have dared to mention it even if he had the chance. **

"Sirius must have sat away from you on purpose," said James. "He likes to brood by himself sometimes."

**Instead, he told Ron and Hermione under his voice about having to take Occlumency lessons with Snape.**

"**Dumbledore wants to stop you having those dreams about Voldemort," said Hermione at once. "Well, you won't be sorry not to have them any more, will you?"**

"**Extra lessons with Snape?" said Ron, sounding aghast. "I'd rather have the nightmares!"**

"But what if something terrible happened as a result?" asked Frank. Harry flinched, remembering Sirius's death.

**They were to return to Hogwarts on the Knight Bus the following day, escorted once again by Tonks and Lupin, both of whom were eating breakfast in the kitchen when Harry, Ron and Hermione came down next morning. **

"Having breakfast with my cousin, are you?" asked Sirius, one eyebrow raised.

"She's probably much better company than you," retorted Remus good-naturedly.

"The next thing I know, you'll probably end up dating her and maybe get married," joked Sirius. The ones from the future tried to contain their laughter.

"Don't be silly," snapped Remus, blushing. "She's at least ten years younger than me, and I'm a werewolf."

"Being a werewolf shouldn't matter," said Alice. "If I wasn't in love with Frank, I'd consider dating and possibly marrying you, Remus."

**The adults seemed to have been mid-way through a whispered conversation as Harry opened the door; all of them looked round hastily and fell silent.**

**After a hurried breakfast, they all pulled on jackets and scarves against the chilly grey January morning. Harry had an unpleasant constricted sensation in his chest; he did not want to say goodbye to Sirius. He had a bad feeling about this parting; he didn't know when they would next see each other and he felt it was incumbent upon him to say something to Sirius to stop him doing anything stupid -**

"Don't worry, Sirius won't do anything stupid," assured James.

Frank looked skeptical. "I seem to remember Sirius doing a lot of stupid things."

"Not when it's something like this," said Remus. "He can be serious sometimes."

"I'm always Sir-" began Sirius.

"Go any further with that overused pun and I'll hex all your hair off and turn your robes pink and frilly," threatened Lily.

**Harry was worried that Snape's accusation of cowardice had stung Sirius so badly he might even now be planning some foolhardy trip beyond Grimmauld Place. Before he could think of what to say, however, Sirius had beckoned him to his side.**

"**I want you to take this," he said quietly, thrusting a badly wrapped package roughly the size of a paperback book into Harry's hands.**

"**What is it?" Harry asked.**

"**A way of letting me know if Snape's giving you a hard time. No, don't open it in here!" said Sirius, with a wary look at Mrs. Weasley, who was trying to persuade the twins to wear handknitted mittens. "I doubt Molly would approve - but I want you to use it if you need me, all right?"**

"Oh, I think I know what it is!" exclaimed James excitedly. Sirius grinned.

"What is it?" Lily asked.

"One of our two-way mirrors," responded Sirius. "James and I use them to talk to each other when we have separate detentions."

"That's perfect," said Remus, also smiling. "It's a safe way for Harry to talk with Sirius without being overheard."

Harry didn't look happy at all, but only his friends noticed. _If Sirius had told me what it was, then I would have sued it and then maybe his death wouldn't have happened_, he thought.

"**Okay," said Harry, stowing the package away in the inside pocket of his jacket, but he knew he would never use whatever it was. **

The smiles faded from the ones from the past. "But you should use it," said Peter. "So why didn't you?"

"I didn't want to get Sirius in trouble," answered Harry. "He was safe in Grimmauld Place."

"I'm not stupid enough to go charging out if Snivellus was being mean to you," said Sirius. "I would have spoken to Dumbledore about it."

**It would not be he, Harry, who lured Sirius from his place of safety, no matter how foully Snape treated him in their forthcoming Occlumency classes.**

"**Let's go, then," said Sirius, clapping Harry on the shoulder and smiling grimly, and before Harry could say anything else, they were heading upstairs, stopping before the heavily chained and bolted front door, surrounded by Weasleys.**

"**Goodbye, Harry, take care," said Mrs. Weasley, hugging him.**

"**See you, Harry, and keep an eye out for snakes for me!" said Mr. Weasley genially, shaking his hand.**

"**Right - yeah," said Harry distractedly; it was his last chance to tell Sirius to be careful; he turned, looked into his godfather's face: and opened his mouth to speak, but before he could do so Sirius was giving him a brief, one-armed hug, and saying gruffly, "Look after yourself, Harry." Next moment, Harry found himself being shunted out into the icy winter air, with Tonks (today heavily disguised as a tall, tweedy woman with iron-grey hair) chivvying him down the steps.**

**The door of number twelve slammed shut behind them. They followed Lupin down the front steps. As he reached the pavement, Harry looked round. Number twelve was shrinking rapidly as those on either side of it stretched sideways, squeezing it out of sight. One blink later, it had gone.**

"**Come on, the quicker we get on the bus the better," said Tonks, and Harry thought there was nervousness in the glance she threw around the square. Lupin flung out his right arm.**

**BANG.**

**A violently purple, triple-decker bus had appeared out of thin air in front of them, narrowly avoiding the nearest lamppost, which jumped backwards out of its way.**

**A thin, pimply, jug-eared youth in a purple uniform leapt down on to the pavement and said, "Welcome to the -"**

"**Yes, yes, we know, thank you," said Tonks swiftly. "On, on, get on -"**

"Dora seems quite testy," said Sirius. "I wonder why."

**And she shoved Harry forwards towards the steps, past the conductor, who goggled at Harry as he passed.**

"So Stan Shunpike is still conductor," mused Remus.

"**Ere - it's 'Arry -!"**

"**If you shout his name I will curse you into oblivion," muttered Tonks menacingly, now shunting Ginny and Hermione forwards.**

"**I've always wanted to go on this thing," said Ron happily, joining Harry on board and looking around.**

Ron made a face. "I certainly changed my mind after that."

"But it's such a fun ride," said Luna happily. "I liked riding it." Everyone looked at her, then shook their heads and didn't comment.

**It had been evening the last time Harry had traveled by Knight Bus and its three decks had been full of brass bedsteads. Now, in the early morning, it was crammed with an assortment of mismatched chairs grouped haphazardly around windows. Some of these appeared to have fallen over when the bus stopped abruptly in Grimmauld Place; a few witches and wizards were still getting to their feet, grumbling, and somebody's shopping bag had slid the length of the bus: an unpleasant mixture of frogspawn, cockroaches and custard creams was scattered all over the floor.**

"**Looks like we'll have to split up," said Tonks briskly, looking around for empty chairs. "Fred, George and Ginny, if you just take those seats at the back… Remus can stay with you."**

**She, Harry, Ron and Hermione proceeded up to the very top deck, where there were two unoccupied chairs at the very front of the bus and two at the back. Stan Shunpike, the conductor, followed Harry and Ron eagerly to the back. Heads turned as Harry passed and, when he sat down, he saw all the faces flick back to the front again.**

**As Harry and Ron handed Stan eleven Sickles each, the bus set off again, swaying ominously. It rumbled around Grimmauld Place, weaving on and off the pavement, then, with another tremendous BANG, they were all flung backwards; Ron's chair toppled right over and Pigwidgeon, who had been on his lap, burst out of his cage and flew twittering wildly up to the front of the bus where he fluttered down on to Hermione's shoulder instead. Harry, who had narrowly avoided falling by seizing a candle bracket, looked out of the window: they were now speeding down what appeared to be a motorway.**

"**Just outside Birmingham," said Stan happily, answering Harry's unasked question as Ron struggled up from the floor. "You keepin' well, then, 'Arry? **

Everyone chuckled and Peter remarked, "Well, he's no longer calling you Neville."

**I seen your name in the paper loads over the summer, but it weren't never nuffink very nice. I said to Ern, I said, 'e didn't seem like a nutter when we met 'im, just goes to show, dunnit?"**

**He handed over their tickets and continued to gaze, enthralled, at Harry. Apparently, Stan did not care how nutty somebody was, if they were famous enough to be in the paper. The Knight Bus swayed alarmingly, overtaking a line of cars on the inside. Looking towards the front of the bus, Harry saw Hermione cover her eyes with her hands, Pigwidgeon swaying happily on her shoulder.**

**BANG.**

**Chairs slid backwards again as the Knight Bus jumped from the Birmingham motorway to a quiet country lane full of hairpin bends. Hedgerows on either side of the road were leaping out of their way as they mounted the verges. From here they moved to a main street in the middle of a busy town, then to a viaduct surrounded by tall hills, then to a windswept road between high-rise flats, each time with a loud BANG.**

"**I've changed my mind," muttered Ron, picking himself up from the floor for the sixth time, "I never want to ride on this thing again."**

"But it's such a great ride," said Luna dreamily.

"For you, maybe, but not for me," said Ron firmly.

"**Listen, it's 'Ogwarts stop after this," said Stan brightly, swaying towards them. "That bossy woman up front 'oo got on with you, she's given us a little tip to move you up the queue. We're just gonna let Madam Marsh off first, though -" there was more retching from downstairs, followed by a horrible spattering sound "- she's not feeling 'er best."**

**A few minutes later, the Knight Bus screeched to a halt outside a small pub, which squeezed itself out of the way to avoid a collision. They could hear Stan ushering the unfortunate Madam Marsh out of the bus and the relieved murmurings of her fellow passengers on the second deck. The bus moved on again, gathering speed, until -**

**BANG.**

**They were rolling through a snowy Hogsmeade. Harry caught a glimpse of the Hog's Head down its side street, the severed boar's head sign creaking in the wintry wind. Flecks of snow hit the large window at the front of the bus. At last they rolled to a halt outside the gates to Hogwarts.**

**Lupin and Tonks helped them off the bus with their luggage, then got off to say goodbye. Harry glanced up at the three decks of the Knight Bus and saw all the passengers staring down at them, noses flat against the windows.**

"They were more likely staring at you, Harry," said Neville.

"But they were with me," pointed out Harry. "So they would have seen them too."

"**You'll be safe once you're in the grounds," said Tonks, casting a careful eye around at the deserted road. "Have a good term, okay?"**

"**Look after yourselves," said Lupin, shaking hands all round and reaching Harry last. "And listen…" he lowered his voice while the rest of them exchanged last-minute goodbyes with Tonks, "Harry, I know you don't like Snape, but he is a superb Occlumens and we all - Sirius included - want you to learn to protect yourself, so work hard, all right?"**

"**Yeah, all right," said Harry heavily, looking up into Lupin's prematurely lined face. "See you, then."**

**The six of them struggled up the slippery drive towards the castle, dragging their trunks.**

**Hermione was already talking about knitting a few elf hats before bedtime. Harry glanced back when they reached the oaken front doors; the Knight Bus had already gone and he half-wished, given what was coming the following evening, that he was still on board.**

**Harry spent most of the next day dreading the evening. His morning double-Potions lesson did nothing to dispel his trepidation, as Snape was as unpleasant as ever. His mood was further lowered by the D.A. members constantly approaching him in the corridors between classes, asking hopefully if there would be a meeting that night.**

"**I'll let you know in the usual way when the next one is," Harry said over and over again, "but I can't do it tonight, I've got to go to - er - remedial Potions."**

"**You take remedial Potions!" asked Zacharias Smith superciliously, having cornered Harry in the Entrance Hall after lunch. "Good Lord, you must be terrible. Snape doesn't usually give extra lessons, does he?"**

"What an annoying git," muttered Sirius. "You should hex him."

The ones from the future made faces, remembering that Zacharias was the only member of the D.A. who had not taken part in the Final Battle, but in fact had pushed through the younger students in his haste to be one of the first to evacuate. Colin, who was underage, had sneaked back to join the fight and had lost his life, but someone from a house that embodied loyalty didn't dare do that.

**As Smith strode away in an annoyingly buoyant fashion, Ron glared after him.**

"**Shall I jinx him? I can still get him from here," he said, raising his wand and taking aim between Smith's shoulder blades.**

"You should, that prat deserves it," said James.

**"Forget it," said Harry dismally. "It's what everyone's going to think, isn't it? That I'm really stup —"**

"**Hi, Harry," said a voice behind him. He turned round and found Cho standing there.**

"**Oh," said Harry as his stomach leapt uncomfortably. "Hi."**

"**We'll be in the library, Harry," said Hermione firmly as she seized Ron above the elbow and dragged him off towards the marble staircase.**

"But I wanted to see that," protested Ron.

"That's why I dragged you away," Hermione said sternly. "I didn't want you saying something stupid and ruining Harry's chance."

"**Had a good Christmas?" asked Cho.**

"**Yeah, not bad," said Harry.**

"**Mine was pretty quiet," said Cho. For some reason, she was looking rather embarrassed.**

"**Erm… there's another Hogsmeade trip next month, did you see the notice?"**

"**What? Oh, no, I haven't checked the noticeboard since I got back."**

"Ooh, she's trying to get you to ask her out!" exclaimed Lily with delight.

"**Yes, it's on Valentine's Day…"**

"That's even better!" exclaimed Lily. "You better have had asked her out, Harry."

"**Right," said Harry, wondering why she was telling him this. "Well, I suppose you want to -?"**

"**Only if you do," she said eagerly.**

**Harry stared. He had been about to say, "I suppose you want to know when the next D.A. meeting is?" but her response did not seem to fit.**

"Oh, Harry, don't you know anything about women at all?" asked James, shaking his head.

"Like you're any better," said Lily. "Always asking me to go out with you in front of everyone and doing stupid things just to get me to notice you. At least Harry doesn't do that with Cho."

"**I - er —" he said.**

"**Oh, it's okay if you don't," she said, looking mortified. "Don't worry. I - I'll see you around."**

**She walked away. Harry stood staring after her, his brain working frantically. Then something clunked into place.**

"**Cho! Hey - CHO!"**

**He ran after her, catching her halfway up the marble staircase.**

"**Er - d'you want to come into Hogsmeade with me on Valentine's Day?"**

"Finally got the point and asked her out," said Frank, stifling laughter.

**"Oooh, yes!" she said, blushing crimson and beaming at him.**

"**Right… well… that's settled then," said Harry, and feeling that the day was not going to be a complete loss after all, he headed off to the library to pick up Ron and Hermione**** before their afternoon lessons, walking in a rather bouncy way himself.**

**By six o'clock that evening, however, even the glow of having successfully asked out Cho Chang could not lighten the ominous feelings that intensified with every step Harry took towards Snape's office.**

**He paused outside the door when he reached it, wishing he were almost anywhere else, then, taking a deep breath, he knocked and entered.**

**The shadowy room was lined with shelves bearing hundreds of glass jars in which slimy bits of animals and plants were suspended in variously colored potions. In one corner stood the cupboard full of ingredients that Snape had once accused Harry - not without reason - of robbing.**

**Harry's attention was drawn towards the desk, however, where a shallow stone basin engraved with runes and symbols lay in a pool of candlelight. Harry recognized it at once - it was Dumbledore's Pensieve. Wondering what on earth it was doing there, he jumped when Snape's cold voice came out of the shadows.**

""Probably so Snape could put any memories he doesn't want Harry to see in there," said Remus.

"**Shut the door behind you, Potter."**

**Harry did as he was told, with the horrible feeling that he was imprisoning himself. When he turned back into the room, Snape had moved into the light and was pointing silently at the chair opposite his desk. Harry sat down and so did Snape, his cold black eyes fixed unblinkingly upon Harry, dislike etched in every line of his face.**

"**Well, Potter, you know why you are here," he said. "The Headmaster has asked me to teach you Occlumency. I can only hope that you prove more adept at it than at Potions."**

"I'm good as long as Snape isn't there in person and I follow the directions of the book," said Harry.

"**Right," said Harry tersely.**

"**This may not be an ordinary class, Potter," said Snape, his eyes narrowed malevolently, "but I am still your teacher and you will therefore call me 'sir' or 'professor' at all times."**

"Then get past your grudge and start acting like an adult, Severus!" snapped Lily.

"**Yes… sir," said Harry.**

**Snape continued to survey him through narrowed eyes for a moment, then said, "Now, Occlumency. As I told you back in your dear godfather's kitchen, this branch of magic seals the mind against magical intrusion and influence."**

"**And why does Professor Dumbledore think I need it, sir?" said Harry, ****looking directly into Snape's eyes and wondering whether Snape would answer.**

**Snape looked back at him for a moment and then said contemptuously, "Surely even you could have worked that out by now, Potter? The Dark Lord is highly skilled at Legilimency -"**

"**What's that? Sir?"**

"**It is the ability to extract feelings and memories from another persons mind -"**

"**He can read minds?" said Harry quickly, his worst fears confirmed.**

"Essentially, yes," said Lily. 'There's more to it, though."

"**You have no subtlety, Potter," said Snape, his dark eyes glittering. "You do not understand fine distinctions. It is one of the shortcomings that makes you such a lamentable potion-maker."**

**Snape paused for a moment, apparently to savor the pleasure of insulting Harry, before continuing.**

"**Only Muggles talk of 'mind-reading'. The mind is not a book, to be opened at will and examined at leisure. Thoughts are not etched on the inside of skulls, to be perused by any invader. The mind is a complex and many-layered thing, Potter - or at least, most minds are." He smirked. "It is true, however, that those who have mastered Legilimency are able, under certain conditions, to delve into the minds of their victims and to interpret their findings correctly. The Dark Lord, for instance, almost always knows when somebody is lying to him. Only those skilled at Occlumency are able to shut down those feelings and memories that contradict the lie, and so can utter falsehoods in his presence without detection."**

"But that's just basically what mind-reading is," protested Alice. "It's not as if people actually think that the mind is like a book."

**Whatever Snape said, Legilimency sounded like mind-reading to Harry, and he didn't like the sound of it at all.**

"**So he could know what we're thinking right now? Sir?"**

"First, Hogwarts is far away from where Moldywart is and has numerous protections, and second, you need eye contact for it to really be effective," said Remus.

"**The Dark Lord is at a considerable distance and the walls and grounds of Hogwarts are guarded by many ancient spells and charms to ensure the bodily and mental safety of those who dwell within them," said Snape. "Time and space matter in magic, Potter. Eye contact is often essential to Legilimency."**

"**Well then, why do I have to learn Occlumency?"**

**Snape eyed Harry, tracing his mouth with one long, thin finger as he did so.**

"**The usual rules do not seem to apply with you, Potter. The curse that failed to kill you seems to have forged some kind of connection between you and the Dark Lord. The evidence suggests that at times, when your mind is most relaxed and vulnerable - when you are asleep, for instance - you are sharing the Dark Lord's thoughts and emotions. ****The Headmaster thinks it inadvisable for this to continue. He wishes me to teach you how to close your mind to the Dark Lord."**

**Harry's heart was pumping fast again. None of this added up.**

"**But why does Professor Dumbledore want to stop it?" he asked abruptly. "I don't like it much, but it's been useful, hasn't it? I mean… I saw that snake attack Mr. Weasley and if I hadn't, Professor Dumbledore wouldn't have been able to save him, would he? Sir?"**

"True, but I wouldn't be surprised if Moldywart knew about the connection now," said James darkly.

**Snape stared at Harry for a few moments, still tracing his mouth with his finger. **

**When he spoke again, it was slowly and deliberately, as though he weighed every word.**

"**It appears that the Dark Lord has been unaware of the connection between you and himself until very recently. Up till now it seems that you have been experiencing his emotions, and sharing his thoughts, without his being any the wiser. However, the vision you had shortly before Christmas -"**

"**The one with the snake and Mr. Weasley?"**

"**Do not interrupt me, Potter," said Snape in a dangerous voice. "As I was saying, the vision you had shortly before Christmas represented such a powerful incursion upon the Dark Lord's thoughts -"**

"**I saw inside the snake's head, not his!"**

"But Moldywart was there too, so it doesn't matter!" exclaimed Alice.

"**I thought I just told you not to interrupt me, Potter?"**

**But Harry did not care if Snape was angry; at last he seemed to be getting to the bottom of this business; he had moved forwards in his chair so that, without realizing it, he was perched on the very edge, tense as though poised for flight.**

"**How come I saw through the snakes eyes if it's Voldemort's thoughts I'm sharing?"**

"**Do not say the Dark Lord's name!" spat Snape.**

**There was a nasty silence. They glared at each other across the Pensieve.**

"**Professor Dumbledore says his name," said Harry quietly.**

"**Dumbledore is an extremely powerful wizard," Snape muttered. "While he may feel secure enough to use the name… the rest of us…" **

"It's just a name," said Sirius, annoyed. "There's no need to be so scared of it. Or you can just call him Moldywart."

"Er, if Snape did that and Moldywart found out, then he'd be dead in an instant," pointed out Lily.

Sirius wanted to mutter, "Not much of a loss," but didn't for fear of arousing Lily's anger.

**He rubbed his left forearm, apparently unconsciously, on the spot where Harry knew the Dark Mark was burned into his skin.**

**"I just wanted to know," Harry began again, forcing his voice back to politeness, "why -"**

"**You seem to have visited the snake's mind because that was where the Dark Lord was at that particular moment," snarled Snape. "He was possessing the snake at the time and so you dreamed you were inside it, too."**

"**And Vol— he - realized I was there?"**

"**It seems so," said Snape coolly.**

"**How do you know?" said Harry urgently. "Is this just Professor Dumbledore guessing, or -?"**

"**I told you," said Snape, rigid in his chair, his eyes slits, "to call me 'sir'."**

"**Yes, sir," said Harry impatiently, "but how do you know -?"**

"**It is enough that we know," said Snape repressively. "The important point is that the Dark Lord is now aware that you are gaining access to his thoughts and feelings. He has also deduced that the process is likely to work in reverse; that is to say, he has realized that he might be able to access your thoughts and feelings in return -"**

"**And he might try and make me do things?" asked Harry. "Sir?" he added hurriedly.**

"**He might," said Snape, sounding cold and unconcerned. "Which brings us back to Occlumency."**

**Snape pulled out his wand from an inside pocket of his robes and Harry tensed in his chair, but Snape merely raised the wand to his temple and placed its tip into the greasy roots of his hair.**

**When he withdrew it, some silvery substance came away, stretching from temple to wand like a thick gossamer strand, which broke as he pulled the wand away from it and fell gracefully into the Pensieve, where it swirled silvery-white, neither gas nor liquid. Twice more, Snape raised the wand to his temple and deposited the silvery substance into the stone basin, then, without offering any explanation of his behavior, he picked up the Pensieve carefully, removed it to a shelf out of their way and returned to face Harry with his wand held at the ready.**

"**Stand up and take out your wand, Potter."**

**Harry got to his feet, feeling nervous. They faced each other with the desk between them.**

**"You may use your wand to attempt to disarm me, or defend yourself in any other way you can think of," said Snape.**

**"And what are you going to do?" Harry asked, eyeing Snape's wand apprehensively.**

"**I am about to attempt to break into your mind," said Snape softly. "We are going to see how well you resist. I have been told that you have already shown aptitude at resisting the Imperius Curse. You will find that similar powers are needed for this… brace yourself, now. Legilimens!"**

"What!" exclaimed Lily, incredulous. "He's not even going to explain anything? The least he could do is tell Harry to empty his mind."

"You can't just empty your mind on command," pointed out Sirius.

"Funny that you should be the one to say that, Padfoot," remarked Remus with a smirk. "You should be very good at Occlumency then." That set everyone, except Sirius, off into laughter.

"Shut up, Moony," snapped Sirius, pouting. "Is this pick-on-Sirius day again?"

**Snape had struck before Harry was ready, before he had even begun to summon any force of resistance. The office swam in front of his eyes and vanished; image after image was racing through his mind like a flickering film so vivid it blinded him to his surroundings.**

**He was five, watching Dudley riding a new red bicycle, and his heart was bursting with jealousy… he was nine, and Ripper the bulldog was chasing him up a tree and the Dursleys were laughing below on the lawn… he was sitting under the Sorting Hat, and it was telling him he would do well in Slytherin… Hermione was lying in the hospital wing, her face covered with thick black hair… a hundred Dementors were closing in on him beside the dark lake… Cho Chang was drawing nearer to him under the mistletoe…**

"**No," said a voice inside Harry's head, as the memory of Cho drew nearer, "you're not watching that, you're not watching it, it's private –"**

**He felt a sharp pain in his knee. Snape's office had come back into view and he realized that he had fallen to the floor; one of his knees had collided painfully with the leg of Snape's desk. He looked up at Snape, who had lowered his wand and was rubbing his wrist. There was an angry weal there, like a scorch mark.**

"Well, you resisted it," said Lily brightly.

"Yeah, after I let Snape see a bunch of memories," Harry said with some bitterness.

"But the point is you did resist, Harry, even if did take a while," said James. "And with Snivelly as your teacher, that's not too bad, since he's not doing a very good job of it."

"**Did you mean to produce a Stinging Hex?" asked Snape coolly.**

"**No," said Harry bitterly, getting up from the floor.**

"**I thought not," said Snape, watching him closely. "You let me get in too far. You lost control."**

"**Did you see everything I saw?" Harry asked, unsure whether he wanted to hear the answer.**

"**Flashes of it," said Snape, his lip curling. "To whom did the dog belong?"**

"**My Aunt Marge," Harry muttered, hating Snape.**

"**Well, for a first attempt that was not as poor as it might have been," said Snape, raising his wand once more. **

"And that's the most praise you'll be getting from that bas-git," said Sirius.

"**You managed to stop me eventually, though you wasted time and energy shouting. You must remain focused. Repel me with your brain and you will not need to resort to your wand."**

"**I'm trying," said Harry angrily, "but you're not telling me how!"**

"**Manners, Potter," said Snape dangerously. "Now, I want you to close your eyes."**

**Harry threw him a filthy look before doing as he was told. He did not like the idea of standing there with his eyes shut while Snape faced him, carrying a wand.**

"**Clear your mind, Potter," said Snape's cold voice. "Let go of all emotion…"**

"After you've just made him angry, how do you expect Harry to clear his mind and let go of his emotions?" demanded Alice,

**But Harry's anger at Snape continued to pound through his veins like venom. Let go of his anger? He could as easily detach his legs…**

"**You're not doing it, Potter… you will need more discipline than this… focus, now…"**

**Harry tried to empty his mind, tried not to think, or remember, or feel…**

"**Let's go again… on the count of three… one - two - three -Legilimens!"**

**A great black dragon was rearing in front of him… his father and mother were waving at him out of an enchanted mirror… Cedric Diggory was lying on the ground with blank eyes staring at him…**

"**NOOOOOOO!"**

**Harry was on his knees again, his face buried in his hands, his brain aching as though someone had been trying to pull it from his skull.**

"**Get up!" said Snape sharply. "Get up! You are not trying, you are making no effort. You are allowing me access to memories you fear, handing me weapons!"**

**Harry stood up again, his heart thumping wildly as though he had really just seen Cedric dead in the graveyard. Snape looked paler than usual, and angrier, though not nearly as angry as Harry was.**

"**I - am - making - an - effort," he said through clenched teeth.**

"**I told you to empty yourself of emotion!"**

"**Yeah? Well, I'm finding that hard at the moment," Harry snarled.**

"**Then you will find yourself easy prey for the Dark Lord!" said Snape savagely. "Fools who wear their hearts proudly on their sleeves, who cannot control their emotions, who wallow in sad memories and allow themselves to be provoked so easily - weak people, in other words - they stand no chance against his powers! **

"Well, you're not exactly doing a great job hiding your emotions yourself," said Ginny sarcastically.

"But there's a difference between Harry and Voldemort," said Hermione. "Snape knows to keep his emotions and true thoughts hidden around Voldemort and will have no problem doing so. With Harry, Snape is more free to show his feelings."

**He will penetrate your mind with absurd ease, Potter!"**

"**I am not weak," said Harry in a low voice, fury now pumping through him so that he thought he might attack Snape in a moment.**

"**Then prove it! Master yourself!" spat Snape. "Control your anger, discipline your mind! We shall try again! Get ready, now! Legilimens!"**

"That would be good advice if Snape didn't sound so angry," remarked Frank, shaking his head.

**He was watching Uncle Vernon hammering the letterbox shut… a hundred Dementors were drifting across the lake in the grounds towards him… he was running along a windowless passage with Mr. Weasley… they were drawing nearer to the plain black door at the end of the corridor… Harry expected to go through it… but Mr. Weasley led him off to the left, down a flight of stone steps…**

"**I KNOW! I KNOW!"**

**He was on all fours again on Snape's office floor, his scar was prickling unpleasantly, but the voice that had just issued from his mouth was triumphant. He pushed himself up again to find Snape staring at him, his wand raised. It looked as though, this time, Snape had lifted the spell before Harry had even tried to fight back.**

"**What happened then, Potter?" he asked, eyeing Harry intently.**

"**I saw - I remembered," Harry panted. "I've just realized…"**

"**Realized what?" asked Snape sharply.**

**Harry did not answer at once; he was still savoring the moment of blinding realization as he rubbed his forehead…**

**He had been dreaming about a windowless corridor ending in a locked door for months, without once realizing that it was a real place. Now, seeing the memory again, he knew that all along he had been dreaming about the corridor down which he had run with Mr. Weasley on the twelfth of August as they hurried to the courtrooms in the Ministry; it was the corridor leading to the Department of Mysteries and Mr. Weasley had been there the night that he had been attacked by Voldemort's snake.**

**He looked up at Snape.**

"**What's in the Department of Mysteries?"**

"Why did you have to ask Snape that?" asked James.  
"Well, it's not like I could ask anyone else when Snape was the only other person in the room," defended Harry.

"**What did you say?" Snape asked quietly and Harry saw, with deep satisfaction, that Snape was unnerved.**

"**I said, what's in the Department of Mysteries, sir?" Harry said.**

"**And why," said Snape slowly, "would you ask such a thing?"**

"**Because" said Harry, watching Snape's face closely, "that corridor I've just seen - I've been dreaming about it for months — I've just recognized it - it leads to the Department of Mysteries… and I think Voldemort wants something from —"**

"**I have told you not to say the Dark Lord's name!"**

**They glared at each other. Harrys scar seared again, but he did not care. Snape looked agitated; but when he spoke again he sounded as though he was trying to appear cool and unconcerned.**

"**There are many things in the Department of Mysteries, Potter, few of which you would understand and none of which concern you. Do I make myself plain?"**

"Actually, one of them concerned me," muttered Harry, wondering how things would have turned out if he already knew about the prophecy.

"**Yes," Harry said, still rubbing his prickling scar, which was becoming more painful.**

"**I want you back here same time on Wednesday. We will continue work then."**

"**Fine," said Harry. He was desperate to get out of Snape's office and find Ron and Hermione.**

**"You are to rid your mind of all emotion every night before sleep; empty it, make it blank and calm, you understand?"**

"**Yes," said Harry, who was barely listening.**

"**And be warned, Potter… I shall know if you have not practiced."**

"You didn't do much of that, did you, Harry?" asked Lily.

"I can't answer, Mum," responded Harry. "It'd give stuff away." Lily looked skeptical, but didn't pursue the matter.

"**Right," Harry mumbled. He picked up his schoolbag, swung it over his shoulder and hurried towards the office door. As he opened it, he glanced back at Snape, who had his back to Harry and was scooping his own thoughts out of the Pensieve with the tip of his wand and replacing them carefully inside his own head. Harry left without another word, closing the door carefully behind him, his scar still throbbing painfully.**

**Harry found Ron and Hermione in the library, where they were working on Umbridge's most recent ream of homework.**** Other students, nearly all of them fifth-years, sat at lamp-lit tables nearby, noses close to books, quills scratching feverishly, while the sky outside the mullioned windows grew steadily blacker. The only other sound was the slight squeaking of one of Madam Pince's shoes, as the librarian prowled the aisles menacingly, breathing down the necks of those touching her precious books.**

**Harry felt shivery; his scar was still aching, he felt almost feverish.**

**When he sat down opposite Ron and Hermione, he caught sight of himself in the window opposite; he was very white and his scar seemed to be showing up more clearly than usual.**

"**How did it go?" Hermione whispered, and then, looking concerned. "Are you all right, Harry?"**

"**Yeah… fine… I dunno," said Harry impatiently, wincing as pain shot through his scar again. "Listen… I've just realized something"**

**And he told them what he had just seen and deduced.**

"**So… so are you saying…" whispered Ron, as Madam Pince swept past, squeaking slightly, "that the weapon - the thing You-Know-Who's after — is in the Ministry of Magic?"**

"**In the Department of Mysteries, it's got to be," H arry whispered. "I saw that door when your dad took me down to the courtrooms for my hearing and it's definitely the same one he was guarding when the snake bit him."**

**Hermione let out a long, slow sigh.**

"**Of course," she breathed.**

"**Of course what?" said Ron rather impatiently.**

"**Ron, think about it… Sturgis Podmore was trying to get through a door at the Ministry of Magic… it must have been that one, it's too much of a coincidence!"**

"That's right!" exclaimed Remus. "That must have been what happened. Good thinking, Hermione." Hermione beamed with pleasure.

"**How come Sturgis was trying to break in when he's on our side?" said Ron.**

"**Well, I don't know," Hermione admitted. "That is a bit odd…"**

"**So what's in the Department of Mysteries?" Harry asked Ron. "Has your dad ever mentioned anything about it?"**

"**I know they call the people who work in there 'Unspeakables',"said Ron, frowning. "Because no one really seems to know what they do - weird place to have a weapon."**

"Not really," Frank said. "There are all kinds of mad stuff down there that they're studying."

"**It's not weird at all, it makes perfect sense," said Hermione. "It will be something top secret that the Ministry has been developing, I expect… Harry, are you sure you're all right?"**

**For Harry had just run both his hands hard over his forehead as though trying to iron it.**

"**Yeah… fine…" he said, lowering his hands, which we re trembling. "I just feel a bit… I don't like Occlumency much."**

"**I expect anyone would feel shaky if they'd had their mind attacked over and over again," said Hermione sympathetically. "Look, let's get back to the common room, we'll be a bit more comfortable there."**

**But the common room was packed and full of shrieks of laughter and excitement; Fred and George were demonstrating their latest bit of joke shop merchandise.**

The Marauders were very excited at this, and even Lily, Frank, and Alice showed some interest.

**"Headless Hats!" shouted George, as Fred waved a pointed hat decorated with a fluffy pink feather at the watching students. "Two Galleons each, watch Fred, now!"**

**Fred swept the hat on to his head, beaming. For a second he merely looked rather stupid; then both hat and head vanished.**

"That's bloody brillant!" exclaimed James and Sirius at the same time.

"Language," said Lily, but was too impressed to really mean it.

**Several girls screamed, but everyone else was roaring with laughter.**

"**And off again!" shouted George, and Fred's hand groped for a moment in what seemed to be thin air over his shoulder; then his head reappeared as he swept the pink-feathered hat from it.**

**"How do those hats work, then?" said Hermione, distracted from her homework and watching Fred and George closely. "I mean, obviously it's some kind of Invisibility Spell, but it's rather clever to have extended the field of invisibility beyond the boundaries of the charmed object… I'd imagine the charm wouldn't have a very long life though."**

"You know, Fred and George were really happy when they heard you say that," commented Ginny.

"Well, it was very impressive magic," replied Hermione.

**Harry did not answer; he was feeling ill.**

"**I'm going to have to do this tomorrow," he muttered, pushing the books he had just taken out of his bag back inside it.**

"**Well, write it in your homework planner then!" said Hermione encouragingly. "So you don't forget!"**

**Harry and Ron exchanged looks as he reached into his bag, withdrew the planner and opened it tentatively.**

"**Don't leave it till later, you big second-rater!" chided the book as Harry scribbled down Umbridge's homework. Hermione beamed at it.**

"**I think I'll go to bed," said Harry, stuffing the homework planner back into his bag and making a mental note to drop it in the fire the first opportunity he got.**

"Harry!" Hermione exclaimed. "You didn't!"

"Of course I didn't," said Harry. Then so only Ron could hear him, he muttered, "That's because I never got around to it."

**He walked across the common room, dodging George, who tried to put a Headless Hat on him, and reached the peace and cool of the stone staircase to the boys' dormitories. He was feeling sick again, just as he had the night he had had the vision of the snake, but thought that if he could just lie down for a while he would be all right.**

**He opened the door of his dormitory and was one step inside it when he experienced pain so severe he thought that someone must have sliced into the top of his head. He did not know where he was, whether he was standing or lying down, he did not even know his own name. **

**Maniacal laughter was ringing in his ears… he was happier than he had been in a very long time… jubilant, ecstatic, triumphant… a wonderful, wonderful thing had happened…**

"Oh dear," said Alice. "If Moldywart's happy, then it's terrible news." Neville turned pale, remembering what would happen in the next chapter, and moved closer to his mum.

"**Harry? HARRY!"**

**Someone had hit him around the face. The insane laughter was punctuated with a cry of pain.**

**The happiness was draining out of him, but the laughter continued…**

**He opened his eyes and, as he did so, he became aware that the wild laughter was coming out of his own mouth. The moment he realized this, it died away; Harry lay panting on the floor, staring up at the ceiling, the scar on his forehead throbbing horribly. Ron was bending over him, looking very worried.**

"**What happened?" he said.**

"**I… dunno…" Harry gasped, sitting up again. "He's really happy… really happy…"**

"**You-Know-Who is?"**

"**Something good's happened," mumbled Harry. **

Everyone stared at him. "You mean something terrible-" began Hermione.

"I meant from Voldemort's point of view," interrupted Harry.

**He was shaking as badly as he had done after seeing the snake attack Mr. Weasley and felt very sick. "Something he's been hoping for."**

**The words came, just as they had back in the Gryffindor changing room, as though a stranger was speaking them through Harry's mouth, yet he knew they were true. He took deep breaths, willing himself not to vomit all over Ron.**

"I'm glad you didn't," said Ron with a small smile.

**He was very glad that Dean and Seamus were not here to watch this time.**

"**Hermione told me to come and check on you," said Ron in a low voice, helping Harry to his feet. "She says your Defenses will be low at the moment, after Snape's been fiddling around with your mind… still, I suppose it'll help in the long run, won't it?" He looked doubtfully at Harry as he helped him towards his bed. Harry nodded without any conviction and slumped back on his pillows, aching all over from having fallen to the floor so often that evening, his scar still prickling painfully. He could not help feeling that his first foray into Occlumency had weakened his mind's resistance rather than strengthening it, and he wondered, with a feeling of great trepidation, what had happened to make Lord Voldemort the happiest he had been in fourteen years.**

"Probably finding a wall to become all powerful," muttered Sirius darkly. Alice handed the book to Hermione and then she and Frank took Neville aside for a bit so they could get to know their son better. After an hour, they rejoined the others and Hermione began reading.


	25. The Beetle at Bay

This chapter is dedicated to Patamon32, Azelmaand Eponie, HappilyBlue, mizz-shy-gurl, and leoshunny1985. Happy Memorial Day to those living in the U.S. and Happy Remembrance Day to those in Canada and Britain.

Author's Note: I apologize for the mix-up with this chapter. I have fixed it now.

**— CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR —**

**The Beetle at Bay**

"What kind of chapter title is that?" asked Peter. "We don't know any beetles."

"Actually, we do," replied Lily. "Though it's the Animagus form of Rita Skeeter."

"What would that idiotic reporter have to do with things?" demanded James.

"Well, let's read this chapter and we'll find out," said Remus reasonably.

**Harry's question was answered the very next morning. When Hermione's **_**Daily Prophet**_** arrived she smoothed it out, gazed for a moment at the front page and gave a yelp that caused everyone in the vicinity to stare at her.**

"**What?" said Harry and Ron together.**

**For an answer she spread the newspaper on the table in front of them and pointed at ten black-and- white photographs that filled the whole of the front page, nine showing wizards' faces and the tenth, a witch's. Some of the people in the photographs were silently jeering; others were tapping their fingers on the frame of their pictures, looking insolent. Each picture was captioned with a name and the crime for which the person had been sent to Azkaban.**

The ones from the past gasped and exchanged horrified looks. "Oh no, there was a mass breakout!" exclaimed Alice.

"That means my bitch of a cousin is out," muttered Sirius angrily.

_**Antonin Dolohov**_**, read the legend beneath a wizard with a long, pale, twisted face who was sneering up at Harry,**_** convicted of the brutal murders of Gideon and Fabian Prewett.**_

Ron and Ginny sighed sadly, having never gotten to know their uncles. When the ones from the past looked curiously at them, Harry explained, "Mrs. Weasley was their sister."

_**Augustus Rookwood**_**, said the caption beneath a pockmarked man with greasy hair who was leaning against the edge of his picture, looking bored, **_**convicted of leaking Ministry of Magic secrets to He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.**_

**But Harry's eyes were drawn to the picture of the witch. Her face had leapt out at him the moment he had seen the page. She had long, dark hair that looked unkempt and straggly in the picture, though he had seen it sleek, thick and shining. She glared up at him through heavily lidded eyes, an arrogant, disdainful smile playing around her thin mouth. Like Sirius, she retained vestiges of great good looks, but something - perhaps Azkaban - had taken most of her beauty.**

Everyone looked angry, especially the Longbottoms, Sirius, and Harry.

_**Bellatrix Lestrange, convicted of the torture and permanent incapacitation of Frank and Alice Longbottom.**_

"I hope that bitch gets what she deserves," snarled Sirius.

"She did," replied Hermione. "And I wouldn't call her a bitch. It'd be an insult to all female canines, who on the whole are rather nice animals." There was laughter at this, and the ones from the future couldn't help staring at her in surprise, for they never expected Hermione to say something like that.

**Hermione nudged Harry and pointed at the headline over the pictures, which Harry, concentrating on Bellatrix, had not yet read.**

**MASS BREAKOUT FROM AZKABAN**

**MINISTRY FEARS BLACK IS 'RALLYING POINT' FOR OLD DEATH EATERS**

Sirius cursed loudly and angrily. "Stupid idiots," spat James. "How can they think something like that?"

"**Black?" said Harry loudly. "Not -?"**

"**Shh!" whispered Hermione desperately. "Not so loud - just read it!"**

_**The Ministry of Magic announced late last night that there has been a mass breakout from Azkaban.**_

_**Speaking to reporters in his private office, Cornelius Fudge, Minister for Magic, confirmed that ten high-security prisoners escaped in the early hours of yesterday evening and that he has already informed the Muggle Prime Minister of the dangerous nature of these individuals.**_

"_**We find ourselves, most unfortunately, in the same position we were two and a half years ago when the murderer Sirius Black escaped," said Fudge last night. "Nor do we think the two breakouts are unrelated. An escape of this magnitude suggests outside help, and we must remember that Black, as the first person ever to break out of Azkaban, would be ideally placed to help others follow in his footsteps. We think it likely that these individuals, who include Black's cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange, have rallied around Black as their leader.**_

"I would rather die than help that bitch or any other Death Eater out!" spat Sirius, pacing the room angrily. The ones from the future winced, as Sirius did die, and in fact by Bellatrix's hand.

_**We are, however, doing all we can to round up the criminals, and we beg the magical community to remain alert and cautious. On no account should any of these individuals be approached."**_

"**There you are, Harry," said Ron, looking awestruck. "That's why he was happy last night."**

"**I don't believe this," snarled Harry, "Fudge is blaming the breakout on Sirius?"**

"Considering that he spent the past half year saying you and Dumbledore are liars, he can hardly say now that Dumbledore warned him that Moldywart was back and got the Dementors on his side so that Death Eaters can escape," Frank said sourly.

"You know, I said something similar," commented Hermione.

"**What other options does he have?" said Hermione bitterly. "He can hardly say, 'everyone, Dumbledore warned me this might happen, the Azkaban guards have joined Lord Voldemort' - stop whimpering, Ron - 'now Voldemort's worst supporters have broken out, too.' I mean, he's spent a good six months telling everyone you and Dumbledore are liars, hasn't he?"**

"If he thinks he'll look bad now, imagine how he'll look when Moldywart shows himself and everyone has to accept that he is back," said Remus.

**Hermione ripped open the newspaper and began to read the report inside while Harry looked around the Great Hall. He could not understand why his fellow students were not looking scared or at least discussing the terrible piece of news on the front page, but very few of them took the newspaper every day like Hermione. There they all were, talking about homework and Quidditch and who knew what other rubbish, when outside these walls ten more Death Eaters had swollen Voldemort's ranks.**

**He glanced up at the staff table. It was a different story there: Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall were deep in conversation, both looking extremely grave. Professor Sprout had the Prophet propped against a bottle of ketchup and was reading the front page with such concentration that she was not noticing the gentle drip of egg yolk falling into her lap from her stationary spoon. Meanwhile, at the far end of the table, Professor Umbridge was tucking into a bowl of porridge. For once her pouchy toad's eyes were not sweeping the Great Hall looking for misbehaving students. She scowled as she gulped down her food and every now and then she shot a malevolent glance up the table to where Dumbledore and McGonagall were talking so intently.**

"**Oh my -" said Hermione wonderingly, still staring at the newspaper.**

"**What now?" said Harry quickly; he was feeling jumpy.**

"**It's… horrible," said Hermione, looking shaken. She folded back page ten of the newspaper and handed it to Harry and Ron.**

**TRAGIC DEMISE OF MINISTRY OF MAGIC WORKER**

"Who died?" asked Peter worriedly.

_**St. Mungo's Hospital promised a full inquiry last night after Ministry of Magic worker Broderick Bode, 49, was discovered dead in his bed, strangled by a potted-plant. Healers called to the scene were unable to revive Mr. Bode, who had been injured in a workplace accident some weeks prior to his death.**_

_**Healer Miriam Strout, who was in charge of Mr. Bode's ward at the time of the incident, has been suspended on full pay and was unavailable for comment yesterday, but a spokeswizard for the hospital said in a statement:**_

"_**St. Mungo's deeply regrets the death of Mr. Bode, whose health was improving steadily prior to this tragic accident.**_

"_**We have strict guidelines on the decorations permitted on our wards but it appears that Healer Strout, busy over the Christmas period, overlooked the dangers of the plant on Mr. Bode's bedside table. As his speech and mobility improved, Healer Strout encouraged Mr. Bode to look after the plant himself, unaware that it was not an innocent Flitterbloom, but a cutting of Devil's Snare which,**_

The ones from the past gasped. "Who would do such a thing?" asked Sirius. "Sending a Devil's Snare disguised as a potted plant?"

"Someone who wanted him dead, obviously," answered Remus. "It was murder."

"I wish I had recognised it," said Neville. "Since I know so much about Herbology and all."

"Don't beat yourself up over it, Neville," said Ron. "We were there too and could have recognized it, after dealing with a Devil's Snare at the end of our first year."

_**when touched by the convalescent Mr. Bode, throttled him instantly.**_

"_**St. Mungo's is as yet unable to account for the presence of the plant on the ward and asks any witch or wizard with information to come forward."**_

"**Bode…" said Ron. "Bode. It rings a bell…"**

"**We saw him," Hermione whispered. "In St. Mungo's, remember? He was in the bed opposite Lockhart's, just lying there, staring at the ceiling. And we saw the Devil's Snare arrive. She - the Healer - said it was a Christmas present."**

**Harry looked back at the story. A feeling of horror was rising like bile in his throat.**

"**How come we didn't recognize Devil's Snare? We've seen it before… we could've stopped this from happening."**

"Well, it's not as if you expected to see a Devil's Snare disguised as a potted plant," said Lily soothingly.

"**Who expects Devil's Snare to turn up in a hospital disguised as a pot plant?" said Ron sharply. "It's not our fault, whoever sent it to the bloke is to blame! They must be a real prat, why didn't they check what they were buying?"**

"**Oh, come on, Ron!" said Hermione shakily. "I don't think anyone could put Devil's Snare in a pot and not realize it tries to kill whoever touches it? This - this was murder… a clever murder, as well… if the plant was sent anonymously, how's anyone ever going to find out who did it?"**

**Harry was not thinking about Devil's Snare. He was remembering taking the lift down to the ninth level of the Ministry on the day of his hearing and the sallow-faced man who had got in on the. Atrium level.**

"**I met Bode," he said slowly. "I saw him at the Ministry with your dad."**

**Ron's mouth fell open.**

"**I've heard Dad talk about him at home! He was an Unspeakable - he worked in the Department of Mysteries!"**

"Definitely murder," said Frank. "Probably the Death Eaters. They didn't want Bode talking about whatever he saw, since he was recovering."

**They looked at each other for a moment, then Hermione pulled the newspaper back towards her, closed it, glared for a moment at the pictures of the ten escaped Death Eaters on the front, then leapt to her feet.**

"**Where are you going?" said Ron, startled.**

"**To send a letter," said Hermione, swinging her bag on to her shoulder. "It… well, I don't know whether… but it's worth trying… and I'm the only one who can."**

"You really should have told me what you were doing, Hermione," said Harry. Then he remembered that if he had known, then his date with Cho wouldn't have been a disaster, and that could have led to him not falling in love with Ginny his sixth year. He decided not to pursue the matter.

"**I hate it when she does that," grumbled Ron, as he and Harry got up from the table and made their own, slower way out of the Great Hall. "Would it kill her to tell us what she's up to for once? It'd take her about ten more seconds - hey, Hagrid!"**

**Hagrid was standing beside the doors into the Entrance Hall, waiting for a crowd of Ravenclaws to pass. He was still as heavily bruised as he had been on the day he had come back from his mission to the giants and there was a new cut right across the bridge of his nose.**

"**All righ', you two?" he said, trying to muster a smile but managing only a kind of pained grimace.**

"**Are you okay, Hagrid?" asked Harry, following him as he lumbered after the Ravenclaws.**

"**Fine, fine," said Hagrid with a feeble assumption of airiness; he waved a hand and narrowly missed concussing a frightened-looking Professor Vector, who was passing. "Jus' busy, yeh know, usual stuff lessons ter prepare - couple o' salamanders got scale rot - an' I'm on probation," he mumbled.**

The ones from the past were furious when they heard this. Sirius began cursing loudly, then remembered his Umbridge list and added to it. "Stupid bi-" He broke off as he realized that he couldn't really call her that particular name either, after what Hermione had said.

"**You're on probation?" said Ron very loudly, so that many of the passing students looked around curiously. "Sorry - I mean - you're on probation?" he whispered.**

"**Yeah," said Hagrid. "S'no more'n I expected, ter tell yeh the truth. Yeh migh' not've picked up on it, bu' that inspection didn' go too well, yeh know… anyway," he sighed deeply. "Bes' go an' rub a bit more chilli powder on them salamanders or their tails'll be hangin' off 'em next. See yeh, Harry… Ron…"**

**He trudged away, out of the front doors and down the stone steps into the damp grounds. Harry watched him go, wondering how much more bad news he could stand.**

**The fact that Hagrid was now on probation became common knowledge within the school over the next few days, but to Harry's indignation, hardly anybody appeared to be upset about it; indeed, some people, Draco Malfoy prominent among them, seemed positively gleeful. As for the freakish death of an obscure Department of Mysteries employee in St. Mungo's, Harry, Ron and Hermione seemed to be the only people who knew or cared. **

"I'm sure the Order knows and cares," pointed out Frank.

"I was referring to the students," replied Harry.

**There was only one topic of conversation in the corridors now: the ten escaped Death Eaters, whose story had finally filtered through the school from those few people who read the newspapers. Rumors were flying that some of the convicts had been spotted in Hogsmeade, that they were supposed to be hiding out in the Shrieking Shack and that they were going to break into Hogwarts, just as Sirius Black had once done.**

**Those who came from wizarding families had grown up hearing the names of these Death Eaters spoken with almost as much fear as Voldemort's; the crimes they had committed during the days of Voldemort's reign of terror were legendary. There were relatives of their victims among the Hogwarts students, who now found themselves the unwilling objects of a gruesome sort of reflected fame as they walked the corridors: Susan Bones, whose uncle, aunt and cousins had all died at the hands of one of the ten, said miserably during Herbology that she now had a good idea what it felt like to be Harry.**

"**And I don't know how you stand it - it's horrible," she said bluntly, dumping far too much dragon manure on her tray of Screechsnap seedlings, causing them to wriggle and squeak in discomfort.**

**It was true that Harry was the subject of much renewed muttering and pointing in the corridors these days, yet he thought he detected a slight difference in the tone of the whisperers' voices. **

**They sounded curious rather than hostile now, and once or twice he was sure he overheard snatches of conversation that suggested that the speakers were not satisfied with the Prophets version of how and why ten Death Eaters had managed to break out of the Azkaban fortress. In their confusion and fear, these doubters now seemed to be turning to the only other explanation available to them: the one that Harry and Dumbledore had been expounding since the previous year.**

"It's about time people started using their brains and realized that Harry and Dumbledore are telling the truth," said James grumpily.

Remus looked thoughtful and wondered if the chapter title had something to do with this.

**It was not only the students' mood that had changed. It was now quite common to come across two or three teachers conversing in low, urgent whispers in the corridors, breaking off their conversations the moment they saw students approaching.**

"**They obviously can't talk freely in the staff room any more," said Hermione in a low voice, as she, Harry and Ron passed Professors McGonagall, Flitwick and Sprout huddled together outside the Charms classroom one day. "Not with Umbridge there."**

"**Reckon they know anything new?" said Ron, gazing back over his shoulder at the three teachers.**

"**If they do, we're not going to hear about it, are we?" said Harry angrily. "Not after Decree… what number are we on now?" For new notices had appeared on the house noticeboards the morning after news of the Azkaban breakout:**

_**BY ORDER OF THE HIGH INQUISITOR OF HOGWARTS**_

_**Teachers are hereby banned from giving students any information that is not strictly related to the subjects they are paid to teach.**_

_**The above is in accordance with Educational Decree Number Twenty-six.**_

_**Signed: Dolores Jane Umbridge, High Inquisitor**_

"And wouldn't that mean that teachers aren't allowed to tell off students when they break rules?" asked Sirius, smirking. "Fred and George are going to have fun with this."

**This latest Decree had been the subject of a great number of jokes among the students. Lee Jordan had pointed out to Umbridge that by the terms of the new rule she was not allowed to tell Fred and George off for playing Exploding Snap in the back of the class.**

"**Exploding Snap's got nothing to do with Defense Against the Dark Arts, Professor! That's not information relating to your subject!"**

**When Harry next saw Lee, the back of his hand was bleeding rather badly. Harry recommended essence of Murtlap.**

"She actually used the blood quill on other students too?" demanded Alice incredulously. Harry nodded.

**Harry had thought the breakout from Azkaban might have humbled Umbridge a little, that she might have been abashed at the catastrophe that had occurred right under the nose of her beloved Fudge. It seemed, however, to have only intensified her furious desire to bring every aspect of life at Hogwarts under her personal control. She seemed determined at the very least to achieve a sacking before long, and the only question was whether it would be Professor Trelawney or Hagrid who went first.**

"It better not be Hagrid," snapped Remus.

**Every single Divination and Care of Magical Creatures lesson was now conducted in the presence of Umbridge and her clipboard. **

"Great, you have to see that ugly toad even more," grumbled Sirius.

"I wouldn't call her that, since it's an insult to all toads," said Neville in amusement. "Trevor definitely wouldn't like it."

Everyone laughed and Sirius said, "Okay, I'll find some other name to call her that won't offend any animals."

**She lurked by the fire in the heavily perfumed tower room, interrupting Professor Trelawney's increasingly hysterical talks with difficult questions about ornithomancy and heptomology, insisting that she predicted students' answers before they gave them and demanding that she demonstrate her skill at the crystal ball, the tea leaves and the rune stones in turn. Harry thought Professor Trelawney might soon crack under the strain. **

**Several times he passed her in the corridors - in itself a very unusual occurrence as she generally remained in her tower room - muttering wildly to herself, wringing her hands and shooting terrified glances over her shoulder, and all the while giving off a powerful smell of cooking sherry. If he had not been so worried about Hagrid, he would have felt sorry for her - but if one of them was to be ousted from their job, there could be only one choice for Harry as to who should remain.**

"Why do I have the feeling that both of them are more likely to be sacked than just one of them?" asked Lily.

"Because that woman is horrible and foul," responded James darkly.

**Unfortunately, Harry could not see that Hagrid was putting up a better show than Trelawney.**

**Though he seemed to be following Hermione's advice and had shown them nothing more frightening than a Crup — a creature indistinguishable from a Jack Russell terrier except for its forked tail - since before Christmas, he too seemed to have lost his nerve. He was oddly distracted and jumpy during lessons, losing the thread of what he was saying to the class, answering questions wrongly, and all the time glancing anxiously at Umbridge. **

"Oh dear," said Alice. "Hagrid is clearly not himself."

**He was also more distant with Harry, Ron and Hermione than he had ever been before, and had expressly forbidden them to visit him after dark.**

"**If she catches yeh, it'll be all of our necks on the line," he told them flatly, and with no desire to do anything that might jeopardize his job further they abstained from walking down to his hut in the evenings.**

**It seemed to Harry that Umbridge was steadily depriving him of everything that made his life at Hogwarts worth living: visits to Hagrid's house, letters from Sirius, his Firebolt and Quidditch.**

Sirius added to his list and the rest of the people from the past spent the next few minutes verbally abusing Umbridge.

**He took his revenge the only way he could - by redoubling his efforts for the D.A..**

**Harry was pleased to see that all of them, even Zacharias Smith, had been spurred on to work harder than ever by the news that ten more Death Eaters were now on the loose,**

"Not that he used it in the final battle," muttered Ron darkly. "Bloody coward."

**but in nobody was this improvement more pronounced than in Neville. The news of his parents' attackers' escape had wrought a strange and even slightly alarming change in him. He had not once mentioned his meeting with Harry, Ron and Hermione on the closed ward in St. Mungo's and, taking their lead from him, they had kept quiet about it too. Nor had he said anything on the subject of Bellatrix and her fellow torturers' escape. In fact, Neville barely spoke during the D.A. meetings any more, but worked relentlessly on every new jinx and counter-curse Harry taught them, his plump face screwed up in concentration, apparently indifferent to injuries or accidents and working harder than anyone else in the room. He was improving so fast it was quite unnerving and when Harry taught them the Shield Charm - a means of deflecting minor jinxes so that they rebounded upon the attacker - only Hermione mastered the charm faster than Neville.**

"We're really proud of you, Neville," said Alice, smiling, and Frank nodded in agreement and patted his son on the back.

"Thanks, Mum and Dad," said Neville, returning the smile.

**Harry would have given a great deal to be making as much progress at Occlumency as Neville was making during the D.A. meetings. **

"Yeah, you were becoming as good in Defense as you were in Herbology," said Harry. "I think I was starting to feel jealous of you, Neville."

Neville shrugged and said modestly, "It was only because I had something to fight for."

**Harry's sessions with Snape, which had started badly enough, were not improving. On the contrary Harry felt he was getting worse with every lesson.**

**Before he had started studying Occlumency, his scar had prickled occasionally, usually during the night, or else following one of those strange flashes of Voldemort's thoughts or mood that he experienced every now and then. Nowadays, however, his scar hardly ever stopped prickling, and he often felt lurches of annoyance or cheerfulness that were unrelated to what was happening to him at the time, which were always accompanied by a particularly painful twinge from his scar. He had the horrible impression that he was slowly turning into a kind of aerial that was tuned in to tiny fluctuations in Voldemort's mood, and he was sure he could date this increased sensitivity firmly from his first Occlumency lesson with Snape. What was more, he was now dreaming about walking down the corridor towards the entrance to the Department of Mysteries almost every night, dreams which always culminated in him standing longingly in front of the plain black door.**

"**Maybe it's a bit like an illness," said Hermione, looking concerned when Harry confided in her and Ron. "A fever or something. It has to get worse before it gets better."**

"Well, it is hard work to master Occlumency," said Remus.

"**The lessons with Snape are making it worse," said Harry flatly. "I'm getting sick of my scar hurting and I'm getting bored with walking down that corridor every night." He rubbed his forehead angrily. "I just wish the door would open, I'm sick of standing staring at it -"**

"**That's not funny," said Hermione sharply. "Dumbledore doesn't want you to have dreams about that corridor at all, or he wouldn't have asked Snape to teach you Occlumency. You're just going to have to work a bit harder in your lessons."**

"**I am working!" said Harry nettled. "You try it some time - Snape trying to get inside your head - it's not a bundle of laughs, you know!"**

"**Maybe…" said Ron slowly.**

"**Maybe what?" said Hermione, rather snappishly.**

"**Maybe it's not Harry's fault he can't close his mind," said Ron darkly.**

"**What do you mean?" said Hermione.**

"**Well, maybe Snape isn't really trying to help Harry…"**

"Yeah, maybe he's trying to make it easier for Moldywart to-" began Sirius.

"Enough, Sirius," interrupted Harry firmly. "Snape isn't the nicest person in the world, but he's on Dumbledore's side."

**Harry and Hermione stared at him. Ron looked darkly and meaningfully from one to the other.**

"**Maybe," he said again, in a lower voice, "he's actually trying to open Harry's mind a bit wider… make it easier for You-Know —"**

"**Shut up, Ron," said Hermione angrily. "How many times have you suspected Snape, and when have you ever been right? Dumbledore trusts him, he works for the Order, that ought to be enough."**

"**He used to be a Death Eater," said Ron stubbornly. "And we've never seen proof that he really swapped sides."**

"We'll see proof two years from now," muttered Harry.

"**Dumbledore trusts him," Hermione repeated. "And if we can't trust Dumbledore, we can't trust anyone."**

Sirius looked grumpy, but Hermione did have a point.

**With so much to worry about and so much to do - startling amounts of homework that frequently kept the fifth-years working until past midnight, secret D.A. sessions and regular classes with Snape - January seemed to be passing alarmingly fast. Before Harry knew it, February had arrived, bringing with it wetter and warmer weather and the prospect of the second Hogsmeade visit of the year. Harry had had very little time to spare for conversations with Cho since they had agreed to visit the village together, but suddenly found himself facing a Valentine's Day spent entirely in her company.**

"Oooh, we get to read about your date!" exclaimed Sirius. "Harry and Cho, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-"

"Shut up," interrupted Harry, face red. A glare from Lily kept Sirius from further teasing.

**On the morning of the fourteenth he dressed particularly carefully. He and Ron arrived at breakfast just in time for the arrival of the post owls. Hedwig was not there - not that Harry had expected her - but Hermione was tugging a letter from the beak of an unfamiliar brown owl as they sat down.**

"**And about time! If it hadn't come today…" she said, eagerly tearing open the envelope and pulling out a small piece of parchment. Her eyes sped from left to right as she read through the message and a grimly pleased expression spread across her face.**

"**Listen, Harry," she said, looking up at him, "this is really important. Do you think you could meet me in the Three Broomsticks around midday?"**

"You're asking Harry to interrupt his first date?" asked Lily incredulously. "I mean his first date with Cho?" (Since his first date was with Parvati at the Yule Ball.)

"It was really important, or I wouldn't have asked," defended Hermione.

"**Well… I dunno," said Harry uncertainly. "Cho might be expecting me to spend the whole day with her. We never said what we were going to do."**

"**Well, bring her along if you must," said Hermione urgently. "But will you come?"**

"**Well… all right, but why?"**

"**I haven't got time to tell you now, I've got to answer this quickly."**

**And she hurried out of the Great Hall, the letter clutched in one hand and a piece of toast in the other.**

"**Are you coming?" Harry asked Ron, but he shook his head, looking glum.**

"**I can't come into Hogsmeade at all; Angelina wants a full day's training. Like it's going to help; we're the worst team I've ever seen. You should see Sloper and Kirke, they're pathetic, even worse than I am." He heaved a great sigh. "I dunno why Angelina won't just let me resign."**

"**It's because you're good when you're on form, that's why," said Harry irritably.**

**He found it very hard to be sympathetic to Ron's plight, when he himself would have given almost anything to be playing in the forthcoming match against Hufflepuff. Ron seemed to have noticed Harry's tone, because he did not mention Quidditch again during breakfast, and there was a slight frostiness in the way they said goodbye to each other shortly afterwards. **

"Actually, I was too depressed to notice your tone, Harry," said Ron,.

**Ron departed for the Quidditch pitch and Harry, after attempting to flatten his hair while staring at his reflection in the back of a teaspoon, proceeded alone to the Entrance Hall to meet Cho, feeling very apprehensive and wondering what on earth they were going to talk about.**

**She was waiting for him a little to the side of the oak front doors, looking very pretty with her hair tied back in a long pony-tail. Harry's feet seemed to be too big for his body as he walked towards her and he was suddenly horribly aware of his arms and how stupid they must look swinging at his sides.**

The Marauders and Frank burst into laughter and even Lily and Alice were amused, though Lily did her best to hide it, since she felt some pity for her son.

"**Hi," said Cho slightly breathlessly.**

"**Hi," said Harry.**

**They stared at each other for a moment, then Harry said, "Well - er — shall we go, then?"**

"**Oh - yes…"**

**They joined the queue of people being signed out by Filch, occasionally catching each other's eye and grinning shiftily, but not talking to each other. **

**Harry was relieved when they reached the fresh air, finding it easier to walk along in silence than just stand about looking awkward. It was a fresh, breezy sort of a day and as they passed the Quidditch stadium Harry glimpsed Ron and Ginny skimming along over the stands and felt a horrible pang that he was not up there with them.**

"**You really miss it, don't you?" said Cho.**

**He looked round and saw her watching him.**

"**Yeah," sighed Harry. "I do."**

"**Remember the first time we played against each other, in the third year?" she asked him.**

"**Yeah," said Harry, grinning. "You kept blocking me."**

"**And Wood told you not to be a gentleman and knock me off my broom if you had to," said Cho, smiling reminiscently. "I heard he got taken on by Pride of Portree, is that right?"**

"**Nah, it was Puddlemere United; I saw him at the World Cup last year."**

"**Oh, I saw you there, too, remember? We were on the same campsite. It was really good, wasn't it?"**

"If I remember correctly, you spilled water down the front of your shirt when you saw Cho at the Cup," Sirius said in a teasing tone, a grin on his face.

"Shut up Sirius," Harry snapped, face crimson.

**The subject of the Quidditch World Cup carried them all the way down the drive and out through the gates. Harry could hardly believe how easy it was to talk to her - no more difficult, in fact, than talking to Ron and Hermione -and he was just starting to feel confident and cheerful when a large gang of Slytherin girls passed them, including Pansy Parkinson.**

"**Potter and Chang!" screeched Pansy, to a chorus of snide giggles. "Urgh, Chang, I don't think much of your taste… at least Diggory was good-looking!"**

James snarled, "Shut up, you c-" He broke off and said, "Damn, I need to come up with something else to call her, since I don't want to insult any cows and cause them to refuse to give milk."

**The girls sped up, talking and shrieking in a pointed fashion with many exaggerated glances back at Harry and Cho, leaving an embarrassed silence in their wake. Harry could think of nothing else to say about Quidditch, and Cho, slightly flushed, was watching her feet.**

"**So… where d'you want to go?" Harry asked as they entered Hogsmeade. The High Street was full of students ambling up and down, peering into the shop windows and messing about together on the pavements.**

"**Oh… I don't mind," said Cho, shrugging. "Urn… shall we just have a look in the shops or something?"**

**They wandered towards Dervish and Banges. **

"That's not a romantic place," said James. "You need to find somewhere else."

"But not Madam Puddifoot's," said Alice. "Frank and I went there once and we didn't like it. Too frilly and lacy and not at all to our taste.."

**A large poster had been stuck up in the window and a few Hogsmeaders were looking at it. They moved aside when Harry and Cho approached and Harry found himself staring once more at the pictures of the ten escaped Death Eaters. The poster, By Order of the Ministry of Magic, offered a thousand-Galleon reward to any witch or wizard with information leading to the recapture of any of the convicts pictured.**

"**It's funny, isn't it," said Cho in a low voice, gazing up at the pictures of the Death Eaters, "remember when that Sirius Black escaped, and there were Dementors all over Hogsmeade looking for him? And now ten Death Eaters are on the loose and there are no Dementors anywhere…"**

"That's because they're no longer under Ministry control, the Ministry has no idea where the Death Eaters are, and unlike Sirius, they're not believed to be after Harry."

"**Yeah," said Harry, tearing his eyes away from Bellatrix Lestrange's face to glance up and down the High Street. "Yeah, that is weird."**

**He wasn't sorry that there were no Dementors nearby, but now he came to think of it, their absence was highly significant. They had not only let the Death Eaters escape, they weren't bothering to look for them… it looked as though they really were outside Ministry control now.**

**The ten escaped Death Eaters were staring out of every shop window he and Cho passed. It started to rain as they passed Scrivenshaft's; cold, heavy drops of water kept hitting Harry's face and the back of his neck.**

"**Um… d'you want to get a coffee?" said Cho tentatively, as the rain began to fall more heavily.**

"**Yeah, all right," said Harry, looking around. "Where?"**

"**Oh, there's a really nice place just up here; haven't you ever been to Madam Puddifoot's?" she said brightly, **

"Oh no, she's one of the girls that actually like the place," said Alice. "Poor Harry."

"Well, we don't like it," said Hermione and Ginny. Ron and Harry exchanged thankful looks that their girlfriends didn't care for the tea shop.

"Their tea and coffee are really good, though," said Luna.

**leading him up a side road and into a small teashop that Harry had never noticed before. It was a cramped, steamy little place where everything seemed to have been decorated with frills or bows. Harry was reminded unpleasantly of Umbridge's office.**

"So you definitely didn't like the place," said Lily, holding back laughter.

"**Cute, isn't it?" said Cho happily.**

"**Er… yeah," said Harry untruthfully.**

"**Look, she's decorated it for Valentine's Day!" said Cho, indicating a number of golden cherubs that were hovering over each of the small, circular tables, occasionally throwing pink confetti over the occupants.**

**They sat down at the last remaining table, which was over by the steamy window. Roger Davies, the Ravenclaw Quidditch Captain was sitting about a foot and a half away with a pretty blonde girl. They were holding hands. The sight made Harry feel uncomfortable, particularly when, looking around the teashop, he saw that it was full of nothing but couples, all of them holding hands. Perhaps Cho would expect him to hold her hand.**

"You should do it, Harry," said Sirius.

"**What can I get you, m'dears?" said Madam Puddifoot, a very stout woman with a shiny black bun, squeezing between their table and Roger Davies's with great difficulty.**

"**Two coffees, please," said Cho.**

**In the time it took for their coffees to arrive, Roger Davies and his girlfriend had started kissing over their sugar bowl. Harry wished they wouldn't; he felt that Davies was setting a standard with which Cho would soon expect him to compete.**

"What's so bad about that?" asked Frank.

"Because I was really nervous and she wasn't the love of my life," responded Harry.

**He felt his face growing hot and tried staring out of the window, but it was so steamed up he couldn't see the street outside. To postpone the moment when he would have to look at Cho, he stared up at the ceiling as though examining the paintwork and received a handful of confetti in the face from their hovering cherub.**

"You really aren't good at dating, are you?" asked Lily, looking sympathetic.

"Well, I think he's wonderful at it," said Ginny. The ones from the past turned to look at her in surprise.

"You don't end up with Harry, do you?" asked Sirius.

"Maybe yes, maybe no," answered Ginny with a mysterious smile. "I can't tell you without the risk of getting us sent back to our own time."

**After a few more painful minutes, Cho mentioned Umbridge. Harry seized on the subject with relief and they passed a few happy moments abusing her, but the subject had already been so thoroughly canvassed during D.A. meetings it did not last very long. Silence fell again. Harry was very conscious of the slurping noises coming from the table next door and cast wildly around for something else to say.**

"**Er… listen, d'you want to come with me to the Three Broomsticks at lunchtime? I'm meeting Hermione Granger there."**

"You really shouldn't have said it like that," said Alice, shaking her head.

"Yes, you shouldn't have, Harry," said Hermione. "If I had known that you would say it like that … I really should have remembered that you're a boy."

**Cho raised her eyebrows.**

"**You're meeting Hermione Granger? Today?"**

"**Yeah. Well, she asked me to, so I thought I would. D'you want to come with me? She said it wouldn't matter if you did."**

"**Oh… well… that was nice of her."**

**But Cho did not sound as though she thought it was nice at all. On the contrary, her tone was cold and all of a sudden she looked rather forbidding.**

"But Hermione's his best friend," said Peter. "What's the big deal in meeting your best -"

"Not when his best friend is a girl," interrupted Remus. "And there was Skeeter's article last year about a love triangle between them and Krum."

**A few more minutes passed in total silence, Harry drinking his coffee so fast that he would soon need a fresh cup. Beside them, Roger Davies and his girlfriend seemed glued together at the lips.**

**Cho's hand was lying on the table beside her coffee and Harry was feeling a mounting pressure to take hold of it. Just do it, he told himself, as a fount of mingled panic and excitement surged up inside his chest, just reach out and grab it. Amazing, how much more difficult it was to extend his arm twelve inches and touch her hand than it was to snatch a speeding Snitch from midair…**

"It's not like that with me, is it?" asked Ginny in an undertone.

"Nope, it's completely natural," replied Harry. She beamed happily.

**But just as he moved his hand forwards, Cho took hers off the table. She was now watching Roger Davies kissing his girlfriend with a mildly interested expression.**

"**He asked me out, you know," she said in a quiet voice. "A couple of weeks ago. Roger. I turned him down, though."**

"Why is she mentioning Roger?" asked Peter, confused.

"Because she wants to make Harry jealous," responded Lily.

**Harry, who had grabbed the sugar bowl to excuse his sudden lunging movement across the table, could not think why she was telling him this. If she wished she were sitting at the next table being heartily kissed by Roger Davies, why had she agreed to come out with him? He said nothing. Their cherub threw another handful of confetti over them; some of it landed in the last cold dregs of coffee Harry had been about to drink.**

"**I came in here with Cedric last year," said Cho.**

**In the second or so it took for him to take in what she had said, Harry's insides had become glacial. He could not believe she wanted to talk about Cedric now, while kissing couples surrounded them and a cherub floated over their heads.**

**Cho's voice was rather higher when she spoke again.**

"**I've been meaning to ask you for ages… did Cedric - did he - m - m - mention me at all before he died?"**

**This was the very last subject on earth Harry wanted to discuss, and least of all with Cho.**

"**Well - no -" he said quietly. "There - there wasn't time for him to say anything. Erm… so… d'you… d'you get to see a lot of Quidditch in the holidays? You support the Tornados, right?"**

"That's not going to work," said Remus.

**His voice sounded falsely bright and cheery. To his horror, he saw that her eyes were swimming with tears again, just as they had been after the last D.A. meeting before Christmas.**

"**Look," he said desperately, leaning in so that nobody else could overhear, "let's not talk about Cedric right now… let's talk about something else."**

**But this, apparently, was quite the wrong thing to say.**

James shook his head. "Cho is the wrong girl for you, Harry. She clearly hasn't gotten over Cedric, and you need to be with a redhead. Like Ginny."

Lily looked annoyed. "James! You didn't have to add the ridiculous redhead thing!"

"But it's true!" protested James. "Potter men end up with redheads. I fell for you and will marry you one day, and you're a redhead. My mother's a redhead too. And my grandmum had red hair, and Dad says his grandmum had red hair also."

"**I thought," she said, tears spattering down on to the table, "I thought you'd u - u - understand! I need to talk about it! Surely you n - need to talk about it t - too! I mean, you saw it happen, d - didn't you?"**

**Everything was going nightmarishly wrong; Roger Davies's girlfriend had even unglued herself to look round at Cho crying.**

"**Well - I have talked about it," Harry said in a whisper, "to Ron and Hermione, but -"**

"That's not going to go well," said Remus, shaking his head.

"**Oh, you'll talk to Hermione Granger!" she said shrilly, her face now shining with tears. Several more kissing couples broke apart to stare. "But you won't talk to me! P - perhaps it would be best if we just… just p-paid and you went and met up with Hermione G-Granger, like you obviously want to!"**

**Harry stared at her, utterly bewildered, as she seized a frilly napkin and dabbed at her shining face with it.**

"**Cho?" he said weakly, wishing Roger would seize his girlfriend and start kissing her again to stop her goggling at him and Cho.**

"**Go on, leave!" she said, now crying into the napkin. "I don't know why you asked me out in the first place if you're going to make arrangements to meet other girls right after me… how many are you meeting after Hermione?"**

"**It's not like that!" said Harry, and he was so relieved at finally understanding what she was annoyed about that he laughed, **

"And that's your third mistake," said Remus. "Or is it fourth? Anyway, I think you can say good-bye to your relationship, Harry." Sirius couldn't help smirking.

"Looks like you don't have much luck with certain girls, son." said James.

"Like you're any better, James!" retorted Lily. "It took you asking me at least ten thousand times before I finally agreed to go out with you."

**which he realized a split second too late was also a mistake.**

**Cho sprang to her feet. The whole tearoom was quiet and everybody was watching them now.**

"**I'll see you around, Harry," she said dramatically, and hiccoughing slightly she dashed to the door, wrenched it open and hurried off into the pouring rain.**

"**Cho!" Harry called after her, but the door had already swung shut behind her with a tuneful tinkle.**

**There was total silence within the teashop. Every eye was on Harry. He threw a Galleon down on to the table, shook pink confetti out of his hair, and followed Cho out of the door.**

**It was raining hard now and she was nowhere to be seen. He simply did not understand what had happened; half an hour ago they had been getting along fine.**

"**Women!" he muttered angrily, sloshing down the rain-washed street with his hands in his pockets. "What did she want to talk about Cedric for, anyway? Why does she always want to drag up a subject that makes her act like a human hosepipe?"**

"Not very sensitive, are you, Harry?" asked Sirius.

"You're one to talk," said Remus. "You're not very sensitive yourself."

**He turned right and broke into a splashy run, and within minutes he was turning into the doorway of the Three Broomsticks. He knew he was too early to meet Hermione, but he thought it likely there would be someone in here with whom he could spend the intervening time. He shook his wet hair out of his eyes and looked around. Hagrid was sitting alone in a corner, looking morose.**

"**Hi, Hagrid!" he said, when he had squeezed through the crammed tables and pulled up a chair beside him.**

**Hagrid jumped and looked down at Harry as though he barely recognized him. Harry saw that he had two fresh cuts on his face and several new bruises.**

"Why does Hagrid keep getting these injuries?" asked Frank.

Sirius shrugged. "Maybe he befriended a giant," he joked. "Or played with Fluffy."

"**Oh, it's yeh, Harry," said Hagrid. "Yeh all right?"**

"**Yeah, I'm fine," lied Harry; but, next to this battered and mournful-looking Hagrid, he felt he didn't really have much to complain about. "Er - are you okay?"**

"**Me?" said Hagrid. "Oh yeah, I'm grand, Harry, grand."**

**He gazed into the depths of his pewter tankard, which was the size of a large bucket, and sighed. **

**Harry didn't know what to say to him. They sat side by side in silence for a moment. Then Hagrid said abruptly, "In the same boat, yeh an' me, aren' we, 'Arry?"**

"**Er -" said Harry.**

"**Yeah… I've said it before… both outsiders, like," said Hagrid, nodding wisely. "An' both orphans. Yeah… both orphans."**

**He took a great swig from his tankard.**

"**Makes a diff'rence, havin' a decent family," he said. "Me dad was decent. An' your mum an' dad were decent. If they'd lived, life woulda bin diff'rent, eh?"**

Everyone in the room looked sad at this.

"**Yeah… I s'pose," said Harry cautiously. Hagrid seemed to be in a very strange mood.**

"**Family," said Hagrid gloomily. "Whatever yeh say, blood's important…"**

**And he wiped a trickle of it out of his eye.**

Frank frowned and looked thoughtful. He couldn't help wondering if Sirius's joke about Hagrid befriending a giant was true. It made sense with Hagrid's talk about family, that is if the giant in question was a relative.

"**Hagrid," said Harry, unable to stop himself, "where are you getting all these injuries?"**

"**Eh?" said Hagrid, looking startled. "Wha' injuries?"**

"**All those!" said Harry, pointing at Hagrid's face.**

"**Oh… tha's jus' normal bumps an' bruises, Harry," said Hagrid dismissively, "I got a rough job."**

**He drained his tankard, set it back on the table and got to his feet.**

"**I'll be seein' yeh, Harry… take care now."**

**And he lumbered out of the pub looking wretched, and disappeared into the torrential rain. Harry watched him go, feeling miserable. Hagrid was unhappy and he was hiding something, but he seemed determined not to accept help. What was going on? But before Harry could think about it any further, he heard a voice calling his name.**

"**Harry! Harry, over here!"**

"That sounds like Colin Creevy," said James.

"I did not sound like that," snapped Hermione, but not really angry as she remembered Colin's fate in the final battle.

"So that was you?" asked Sirius in surprise.

"Yes," she replied, glaring at him.

**Hermione was waving at him from the other side of the room. He got up and made his way towards her through the crowded pub. He was still a few tables away when he realized that Hermione was not alone. She was sitting at a table with the unlikeliest pair of drinking mates he could ever have imagined: Luna Lovegood and none other than Rita Skeeter, ex-journalist on the **_**Daily Prophet **_**and one of Hermione's least favorite people in the world.**

"Oh, so that explains the chapter title," said Peter. "Though why is she there?"

"You'll find out," said Luna with a dreamy smile.

"**You're early!" said Hermione, moving along to give him room to sit down. "I thought you were with Cho, I wasn't expecting you for another hour at least!"**

"**Cho?" said Rita at once, twisting round in her seat to stare avidly at Harry. "A girl?"**

**She snatched up her crocodile-skin handbag and groped within it.**

"**It's none of your business if Harry's been with a hundred girls," Hermione told Rita coolly. "So you can put that away right now."**

**Rita had been on the point of withdrawing an acid-green quill from her bag. Looking as though she had been forced to swallow Stinksap, she snapped her bag shut again.**

"**What are you up to?" Harry asked, sitting down and staring from Rita to Luna to Hermione.**

"**Little Miss Perfect was just about to tell me when you arrived," said Rita, taking a large slurp of her drink. "I suppose I'm allowed to talk to him, am I?" she shot at Hermione.**

"**Yes, I suppose you are," said Hermione coldly.**

**Unemployment did not suit Rita. **

"Good," said just about everyone in the room.

**The hair that had once been set in elaborate curls now hung lank and unkempt around her face. The scarlet paint on her two-inch talons was chipped and there were a couple of false jewels missing from her winged glasses. She took another great gulp of her drink and said out of the corner of her mouth, "Pretty girl, is she, Harry?"**

"**One more word about Harry's love life and the deal's off and that's a promise," said Hermione irritably.**

"**What deal?" said Rita, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand. "You haven't mentioned a deal yet, Miss Prissy, you just told me to turn up. Oh, one of these days…" She took a deep shuddering breath.**

"Oh!" exclaimed Lily. "You're blackmailing Rita to write an article telling the truth about Moldywart's return, Hermione! And you're going to have it printed in your father's magazine, Luna! Am I right?" Hermione and Luna both nodded.

"**Yes, yes, one of these days you'll write more horrible stories about Harry and me," said Hermione indifferently. "Find someone who cares, why don't you?"**

"**They've run plenty of horrible stories about Harry this year without my help," said Rita, shooting a sideways look at him over the top of her glass and adding in a rough whisper, "How has that made you feel, Harry? Betrayed? Distraught? Misunderstood?"**

"**He feels angry, of course," said Hermione in a hard, clear voice. "Because he's told the Minister for Magic the truth and the Minister's too much of an idiot to believe him."**

"**So you actually stick to it, do you, that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is back?" said Rita, lowering her glass and subjecting Harry to a piercing stare while her finger strayed longingly to the clasp of the crocodile bag. "You stand by all this garbage Dumbledore's been telling everybody about You-Know-Who returning and you being the sole witness?"**

"He wasn't the sole witness," snapped Sirius. "There were Lucius Malfoy, Wormtail, Avery, Crabbe and Goyle Senior, Macnair, and several other Death Eaters present too."

"**I wasn't the sole witness," snarled Harry. "There were a dozen-odd Death Eaters there as well. Want their names?"**

"**I'd love them," breathed Rita, now fumbling in her bag once more and gazing at him as though he was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. "A great bold headline: 'Potter Accuses… ' A sub-heading, 'Harry Potter Names Death Eaters Still Among Us'. And then, beneath a nice big photograph of you, 'Disturbed teenage survivor of You-Know-Who's attack, Harry Potter, 15, caused outrage yesterday by accusing respectable and prominent members of the wizarding community of being Death Eaters… '"**

"Other than the jibes against you, Harry, that sounds pretty good," declared James.

**The Quick-Quotes Quill was actually in her hand and halfway to her mouth when the rapturous expression on her face died.**

"**But of course," she said, lowering the quill and looking daggers at Hermione, "Little Miss Perfect wouldn't want that story out there, would she?"**

"**As a matter of fact," said Hermione sweetly, "that's exactly what Little Miss Perfect does want."**

**Rita stared at her. So did Harry. Luna, on the other hand, sang Weasley is our King dreamily under her breath and stirred her drink with a cocktail onion on a stick.**

"**You want me to report what he says about He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?" Rita asked Hermione in a hushed voice.**

"**Yes, I do," said Hermione. "The true story. All the facts. Exactly as Harry reports them. He'll give you all the details, he'll tell you the names of the undiscovered Death Eaters he saw there, he'll tell you what Voldemort looks like now - oh, get a grip on yourself," she added contemptuously, throwing a napkin across the table, for, at the sound of Voldemort's name, Rita had jumped so badly she had slopped half her glass of Firewhisky down herself.**

**Rita blotted the front of her grubby raincoat, still staring at Hermione. Then she said baldly, "The **_**Prophet**_** wouldn't print it. In case you haven't noticed, nobody believes his cock-and-bull story. Everyone thinks he's delusional. Now, if you let me write the story from that angle -"**

"There's no point, since there's lots of those already," snapped Alice.

"**We don't need another story about how Harry's lost his marbles!" said Hermione angrily. "We've had plenty of those already, thank you! I want him given the opportunity to tell the truth!"**

"**There's no market for a story like that," said Rita coldly.**

"**You mean the **_**Prophet**_** won't print it because Fudge won't let them," said Hermione irritably.**

**Rita gave Hermione a long, hard look. Then, leaning forwards across the table towards her, she said in a businesslike tone, "All right, Fudge is leaning on the **_**Prophet**_**, but it comes to the same thing. They won't print a story that shows Harry in a good light. Nobody wants to read it. It's against the public mood. This last Azkaban breakout has got people quite worried enough. People just don't want to believe You-Know-Who's back."**

"**So the **_**Daily Prophet **_**exists to tell people what they want to hear, does it?" said Hermione scathingly.**

**Rita sat up straight again, her eyebrows raised, and drained her glass of Firewhisky.**

"**The **_**Prophet**_** exists to sell itself, you silly girl," she said coldly.**

"**My dad thinks it's an awful paper," said Luna, chipping into the conversation unexpectedly.** **Sucking on her cocktail onion, she gazed at Rita with her enormous, protuberant, slightly mad eyes. "He publishes important stories he thinks the public needs to know. He doesn't care about making money."**

"Which is very admirable of him," said Lily. "We need more people like that."

"Thank you," said Luna, beaming.

**Rita looked disparagingly at Luna.**

"**I'm guessing your father runs some stupid little village newsletter?" she said. "Probably, **_**Twenty--Five Ways to Mingle With Muggles **_**and the dates of the next Bring and Fly Sale?"**

"**No," said Luna, dipping her onion back into her Gillywater, "he's the editor of **_**The Quibbler**_**."**

**Rita snorted so loudly that people at a nearby table looked round in alarm.**

"'**Important stories he thinks the public needs to know', eh?" she said witheringly. "I could manure my garden with the contents of that rag."**

"**Well, this is your chance to raise the tone of it a bit, isn't it?" said Hermione pleasantly. "Luna says her father's quite happy to take Harry's interview. That's who'll be publishing it."**

"How did you think of having _The Quibbler_ publish it?" asked Alice curiously.

"Well, I knew the _Prophet_ wouldn't," responded Hermione. "And I knew Luna and that her father was likely to want to publish such an article."

**Rita stared at them both for a moment, then let out a great whoop of laughter.**

"_**The Quibbler**_**!" she said, cackling. "You think people will take him seriously if he's published in **_**The Quibbler**_**!"**

"**Some people won't," said Hermione in a level voice. "But the **_**Daily Prophet's **_**version of the Azkaban breakout had some gaping holes in it. I think a lot of people will be wondering whether there isn't a better explanation of what happened, and if there's an alternative story available, even if it is published in a -" she glanced sideways at Luna, "in a - well, an unusual magazine - I think they might be rather keen to read it."**

**Rita didn't say anything for a while, but eyed Hermione shrewdly, her head a little to one side.**

"**All right, let's say for a moment I'll do it," she said abruptly. "What kind of fee am I going to get?"**

"Probably nothing," said Sirius.

"**I don't think Daddy exactly pays people to write for the magazine," said Luna dreamily. "They do it because it's an honor and, of course, to see their names in print."**

**Rita Skeeter looked as though the taste of Stinksap was strong in her mouth again as she rounded on Hermione.**

"**I'm supposed to do this for free?"**

"Yeah, or Hermione will tell the authorities that you're an unregistered Animagus," said James with a smirk.

"**Well, yes," said Hermione calmly, taking a sip of her drink. "Otherwise, as you very well know, I will inform the authorities that you are an unregistered Animagus. Of course, the **_**Prophet**_** might give you rather a lot for an insider's account of life in Azkaban."**

**Rita looked as though she would have liked nothing better than to seize the paper umbrella sticking out of Hermione's drink and thrust it up her nose.**

"**I don't suppose I've got any choice, have I?" said Rita, her voice shaking slightly. She opened her crocodile bag once more, withdrew a piece of parchment, and raised her Quick-Quotes Quill.**

"**Daddy will be pleased," said Luna brightly. A muscle twitched in Rita's jaw.**

"**Okay, Harry?" said Hermione, turning to him. "Ready to tell the public the truth?"**

"**I suppose," said Harry, watching Rita balancing the Quick-Quotes Quill at the ready on the parchment between them.**

"**Fire away, then, Rita," said Hermione serenely, fishing a cherry out from the bottom of her glass.**

"This is excellent," commented Remus. "The public's going to get the complete truth about Moldywart's return."

"Can you imagine the look on Umbitch's face when the article comes out?" asked Sirius, laughing. "I apologize to any female canines that were offended by that."

"She was pretty mad about it," said Ginny, taking the book to read next.

Everyone grinned and then Ginny started on the next chapter.


End file.
